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5 Ways to Be More Socially Intelligent

January 10, 2019 by Power of Positivity

What does it mean to be socially intelligent? Consider the person who is arguably the best example of the concept.

The Dalai Lama is beloved wherever he goes.

Just do a quick Google search and watch a few video clips. The adoration for the Dalai Lama quickly becomes apparent. People love him in Tibet (of course), but they also love him in places like India, the U.K, and even the U.S.

Why do we consider the Dalai Lama a Socially Intelligent Person?

Well, it can’t be for how he speaks. Although his English is serviceable, and his intellect razor-sharp, he can be hard to understand.

It can’t be for his religious beliefs. The Dalai Lama is a Tibetan Buddhist who often visits nations where the majority population is Hindu, Muslim, and even Christian.

It can’t even be for his fame. While most certainly recognizable, the Dalai Lama doesn’t have celebrity status in most places. Take away the multitude of cameras following him around, and most people would probably see an older man who dresses funny.

And who always seems to have a big smile on his face.

The simple truth is that the Dalai Lama is beloved because he possesses – among other qualities – a high degree of social intelligence. (For the purposes of this article, we will refer to social intelligence and emotional intelligence [EQ] synonymously.)

Let’s quickly define social intelligence as “the capacity to know oneself and to know others.” [Emphasis added]. It is in this capacity where the Dalai Lama excels.

In this article, we’re going to talk some more about how to be more socially intelligent.

Let’s get to it.

Figure: Model of Emotional Intelligence by Multi-Health Systems

The above image is a model of emotional intelligence created by Canadian researchers at Multi-Health Systems. It’s an excellent, easy-to-understand framework of emotional intelligence. Above all, it provides a much-needed simplification of what can be a confusing topic.

While we will be focusing primarily on the ‘Interpersonal’ category of the model, let’s briefly describe each. These five main categories of the model are as follows:

Self-perception
Self-expression
Interpersonal
Decision making
Stress management

We’ll also define the subcomponents of each group.

Self-perception

(Do you know your personal strengths and areas for improvement? Do you possess self-respect and authenticity?)

Emotional self-awareness: The ability to understand your emotions and their impact on your life.

Self-regard: The consideration of oneself, particularly one’s self-interests.

Self-actualization: The fulfillment of one’s talents and potentials in a way that brings contentment.

Self-expression

(How well do you communicate your emotions, including assertiveness? Do you feel comfortable with your sense of individuality?)

Emotional expression: The conveying of the state of emotions through verbal and non-verbal language.

Independence: Having a sense of individuality, along with the capacity of individual expression.

Assertiveness: The ability to stand up for oneself or others in a calm, positive, non-aggressive manner.

Interpersonal

(What is the quality of your relationships? Can you empathize with people and groups? Do you have a sense of social responsibility?)

Interpersonal relations: An intimate and mutually-felt association (i.e., bond) between two people.

Empathy: The skill of being able to consider and understand the perspective (e.g., emotions, thoughts) of another, particularly in a challenging environment or situation.

Social responsibility: Holding the interest of greater society in mind by acting in an obligatorily ethical manner.

Decision-making

(Can you aptly manage the state of your mind and emotions, no matter how difficult? How is your decision-making ability?

Impulse control: Controlling sudden convincing behaviors, emotions, and thoughts when appropriate.

Reality testing: The ability to objectively assess an emotion or thought against the backdrop of real-life situations.

Problem-solving: Dealing constructively with complex or difficult issues by finding workable solutions.

Stress management

(Can you remain flexible and tolerant in the face of stress and uncertainty?)

Flexibility: The willingness to compromise or change one’s position for the “greater good.”

Stress tolerance: The ability to be composed and relaxed in challenging situations, especially when facing strong emotions.

Optimism: Having a light-hearted and positive mindset in general.

You will notice that all of these components are interdependent. That is, it’s impossible to extract one aspect of the model without affecting the whole.

For example, consider the subcomponent of self-expression, assertiveness. Too much or too little assertiveness will influence the subcomponent interpersonal relationships (and even social responsibility) under the interpersonal category.

One must take a holistic approach to become more socially intelligent. We will discuss how to do so in the next session.

5 Ways to Become More Socially Intelligent

“Social intelligence is one of the greatest elements you can utilize to live and thrive in…society. You can.. understand how your behavior influences other people…you can hold better conversations…create better relationships, …and exist in this world with greater ease.” ~ Jonny Bell (Source)

Without further ado, here are five ways that anyone can become more socially intelligent.

Have an ‘outsider’s awareness.’

Estimates of how much communication is non-verbal vary from around 55 percent to as high as over 90 percent. You’ve no doubt heard of the “7% rule,” which claims that just 7 percent of what we communicate is verbal. Suffice to say that the majority of what we convey stems from two things: body language and tone of voice.

It’s essential, therefore, to be aware of how one comes off. You must have an outsider’s awareness.

Consider your body language. Is it engaging? Are you facing towards or away from whoever is speaking? How’s your eye contact? What about your tone? Is it inflecting or flat? Unless you’re Ben Stein, there should be at least a bit of variance.

If you don’t know, ask a friend. Many people do just that and can improve their communication skills with minimal effort.

Fine-tune your assertiveness

It is a mistake to equate assertiveness with aggression. Some people think that because they aren’t aggressive that they can’t be assertive. This is not true.

Assertiveness is simply the ability to state your thoughts and feelings with confidence. Thus, you’re asserting how you think and feel. It is very human and nothing for which to be ashamed.

It’s okay if you don’t quite yet have the confidence part down. First, understand that aggression is not an integral part of assertiveness – at least not right assertiveness. Second, take it slow; don’t try to go from 0-to-60 – from passive to assertive – too quickly. It will feel as if you’re going too hard against the grain and dampen your progress. Lastly, use a systematic approach. Research into the components of assertiveness, such as confident body language, and work on one thing at a time.

Practice virtual social intelligence

Some people drop any semblance of social intelligence as soon as they hop online. Backwardly, they think, “Oh, no one can see me, so now I can act like a complete ass and tell everyone how I really feel!” However, this sort of attitude carries into everyday interactions, whether we realize it or not.

Others are downright atrocious at carrying social intelligence skills over from in-person to a virtual medium, like the internet. Also, some do the same with a phone call, too.

Instead, think of any social media, chat, or some other platform as a means of honing your social intelligence skills. This process entails communication with some articulation, being polite and responsive, and practicing active listening.

Be yourself (cliché!)

Putting up a front in social interactions can be exhausting. It is also entirely unnecessary.

People who use a different persona in the public sphere primarily do so out of a fear of rejection. They think that if they act a certain way that this person or group of people will like or accept them.

For a short while, one may indeed gain some acceptance. However, continually putting up a front isn’t a wise long-term solution. People will see through the ‘mask” – and you risk losing something more valuable than likeability: credibility.

Be yourself and let the chips fall where they may. This is social intelligence.

Practice active listening to become more socially intelligent

While we’ve mentioned it briefly above, the art of active listening deserves its place.

All people fall into one of four categories when listening. A non-listener, where someone is paying zero attention to what’s being said; a marginal listener, where one’s reception and understanding of what’s said is not absent, but weak; an evaluative listener, wherein the person is listening critically in the anticipation of responding, whether than genuinely listening, and an active listener, which describes a person that is open and receptive to communication.

Active listening is a skill that can only be practiced when fully concentrating one’s attention on what is being said or conveyed. So to actively listen means you’ll become more socially intelligent by doing the following:

Ignoring any impulse to interrupt the other person
Displaying (genuine) interest on what is said
Practicing empathy when appropriate
Having open, receptive body language
Remembering pertinent details

5 Signs of a Strong Woman

January 10, 2019 by Kristen Butler

What does it mean to be a strong woman, exactly? What sets these women apart from all the others? Basically, they don’t take crap from anyone. They stand tall alone and don’t let anything ruffle their feathers like a tree withstanding a terrible storm. They know their worth and don’t let anyone squash it.

These days, we all have to muster up strength to get through this crazy world, but strong women have already mastered the art of living life on their own terms. They can show us valuable lessons about resilience in the face of adversity and rising above the obstacles that life might put before us.

If you believe you have a strong woman in your life, you might recognize her by the following signs.

Here are 5 telltale signs of a strong woman:

“The world needs strong women; women who will lift & build others, who will love & be loved, women who live bravely, both tender & fierce; women of indomitable will.” – Amy Tenney

1. She respects herself and others.

A strong woman respects herself enough not to get treated like a doormat and gives that same respect to others. She knows that everyone deserves to have a voice and be heard; she expects people to give her that same courtesy. Rather than getting upset when people don’t treat her as she would like to get treated, however, she simply becomes the bigger person and kills them with kindness.

It takes a lot of maturity for a person to stand tall and not let other people’s behavior drag them down. The strong woman continues to surprise people with her wisdom and humility. She strikes the right balance between arrogance and low self-esteem because she demands respect but doesn’t have a superiority complex about her.

In other words, she treats everyone equally and expects the same from others.

Her parents raised her to treat the janitor the same as the CEO, and this lesson carried over into her adult life. We can learn much about how to treat people from a strong woman.

2. She’s independent.

She doesn’t need any man or woman to help her get through life. She’d rather do things on her own than have others disappoint her, anyway. She has high standards for herself. You’ll find her constantly crossing goals and achievements off her list, because she doesn’t want to look back on her life with regrets.

However, this independent streak can get her into trouble sometimes. In an article on Psychology Today, Marcia Reynolds, a leadership coach and holder of a doctorate in psychology, says, “We strong women often feel we need to tough it out on our own. We forget to give others the gift of letting them help us.”

Strong women have often been raised with the “winner’s mentality,” meaning that their parents see them as high achievers who can accomplish a great deal on their own. They have been bred for greatness, which makes it hard for strong women to allow others to help them. They don’t really think they need help, which can lead to them taking on more than they can handle.

Independence is a double-edged sword in that way. If you’re a strong woman, try to see the benefit of allowing yourself to need others, too.

3. She knows how to control her emotions.

A strong woman knows the power of her mind and doesn’t allow it to control her life. She masters her emotions and doesn’t let them govern her. This woman knows emotions change constantly, just like the weather, so she doesn’t see much value in dwelling on situations or feelings. She allows herself to feel the emotion and then moves on.

On another note, she doesn’t allow people or events to dictate how she feels. Instead of letting others control her energy, she puts her own energy out into the world. She leaves a lasting imprint on others because she knows exactly what she wants to bring to the table in any situation. She doesn’t allow fear or doubts to control her energy, because she knows these emotions won’t allow her to achieve the desired result.

She sees life much like a game. To win, the strong woman knows that she must always bring her best self to the table. She puts on a brave face and conquers whatever stands in her path, and does so with a balanced, controlled state of mind.

4. A strong woman takes risks.

The strong woman knows when to push her luck and when to fold. She knows that life requires us to push ourselves if we want to grow and learn; staying stuck in fear will only breed complacency. She takes risks in order to become better-rounded and test her limitations. This woman knows that a lot of our boundaries can be crossed if we jump the mental hurdles first.

As kids, we believe we can do anything because our parents and teachers tell us we can. We don’t have any fear because the world’s programming hasn’t affected us yet. If we fall down and get hurt as a child, we don’t fixate on the event and allow it to grow into a fear. We face our fear over and over until we have learned to master it. Kids remain in the present moment because they have open minds. They want to absorb everything life can teach them.

Then, as we grow up, we start to put up walls and tell ourselves we can’t do certain things. We form an image of ourselves in our heads that becomes our identity. After a while, we become fixed. We don’t believe we can bend and mold ourselves into something new. However, the strong woman breaks this cycle often. She pushes herself to do new things so that her identity and self-image don’t solidify. She doesn’t allow fear to control her because she knows that she can’t learn unless she’s in a calm, confident state of mind.

5. She tries to remain positive.

Positive thinking stays in the forefront of her mind, because she knows that she can’t live a positive life with a negative view of the world. A strong woman knows that positivity can change one’s life, taking them from the depths of despair to the highest altitudes of joy. It can shift their perspective and help them make the best of any situation.

Therefore, the strong woman utilizes the power of positive thinking in her daily life. She doesn’t let the clouds block her sunshine; instead, she becomes the light source. For example, if she lost her job recently, she doesn’t let negative thinking trick her into believing that she will never find another job. Instead, she looks at the positives.

Maybe she’d be better off without that job. Maybe she wasn’t loving it as much as she thought she did. She looks toward the future and believes that she’ll find something better. She knows she’ll have a much better chance of turning her thoughts into reality by putting out that energy.

This woman doesn’t fixate on the problems but focuses on solutions. The strong woman looks at what she can do to improve her situation, such as looking up jobs and calling on her support network to see if they can help her.

Other Key Traits of a Strong Woman

She knows what she wants from life and isn’t afraid to go after it.
A strong woman likes to be in control, but knows when it’s someone else’s time to shine.
She’s creative and uses her imagination to create her reality.
They don’t like drama or gossip and steer clear of people who engage in these shallow behaviors.
They don’t sugarcoat anything. They tell it like it is and expect others to do the same.
Strong women care for their health and happiness and don’t expect others to do it for them.
They need a lot of time to recharge their energy since they use so much of it daily.
A strong woman surrounds herself with positive, empowered people. She doesn’t mesh well with negative people.
They constantly want to learn new things and test their limits.
They have an open mind and believe they can do anything in life.
She doesn’t let anyone manipulate her. She knows her worth and doesn’t believe in keeping her mouth shut just so she doesn’t rock the boat.

Final Thoughts on Signs of a Strong Woman

Strong women are special people who make big changes in this world. They have a vision and don’t stop until their dreams become reality. To them, life is too short to shrink into a lesser version of themselves. They rise up and meet themselves to become the person they were meant to be. A strong woman will shake this world to its core and make a permanent imprint on the universe.

51 Best Falling In Love Quotes

January 9, 2019 by Power of Positivity

There are many amazing moments in life; buying your first car, receiving your first kiss, going on your dream vacation, etc. Falling in love for someone is definitely at the top of the list.

What if you can’t find the proper arrangement of words to express your love for the person you’ve fallen for? What if you’ve forgotten what it felt like to fall in love and you long to feel that emotion again?

No matter what the reason, these falling in love quotes will certainly help you with the problem you’re facing. Continue reading to find Falling at First Sight Quotes, Soulmates Falling in Love Quotes, Falling For Her Quotes, Falling For Him Quotes, and Falling For You Quotes.

51 Falling in Love Quotes That Will Give You Butterflies

Falling at First Sight Quotes

1. “I knew right away that you were it for me, there were no reservations or second thoughts, I saw you and in an instant knew in my bones, my soul had known your soul lifetimes ago.” ~Beau Taplin

2. “When I saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew.” ~Arrigo Boito

3. “This is going to sound crazy, but… from the moment I first set eyes on you I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. ~Leigh Fallon, Carrier of the Mark

4. “I didn’t plan on falling in love with you, and I doubt if you planned on falling in love with me. But once we met, it was clear that neither of us could control what was happening to us.” ~Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

5. “Just one kiss. Sometimes that’s all it takes for a heart to lose its balance.” ~JM Storm

6. “It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight.” ~Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita

7. “It’s not exactly love at first sight. It is more like soul recognition.” ~Lynette Simeone

8. “I didn’t choose you. I just took one look at you, and then there was just no turning back.” ~Unknown

9. “This was love at first sight, love everlasting: a feeling unknown, unhoped for, unexpected–in so far as it could be a matter of conscious awareness; it took entire possession of him, and he understood, with joyous amazement, that this was for life.” ~Thomas Mann

10. “Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight, for I ne’er saw true beauty till this night.” ~William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

Soulmates Falling in Love Quotes

11. “I cannot remember exactly the first time your soul whispered to mine, but I know you woke it. And it has never slept since.” ~JM Storm

12. “You cannot look into someone’s soul and not fall in love with them. I looked into your soul once, I am trapped for eternity.” ~Cynthia Go

13. “There is something unusual about us. Something deeply spiritual. The way we fall into one another so naturally as if our love was carved from the earth. There are star systems bursting at our fingertips when we touch. We are in tune. Our hearts croon the same old song. The universe planned for it. I know it. I know it.” ~Beau Taplin

14. “…And then my soul saw you and it kind of went, “Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking for you.” ~Iain Thomas

15. “Falling for him wasn’t falling at all. It was walking into a house and suddenly knowing you’re home.” ~R.I.D

16. “It was instinctive, the way I fell for you. Like an effortless intake of breath.” ~Josh Walker

17. “I think some souls have a way of connecting without our knowledge. That’s why you can meet someone for the first time, but inside you just know. You know it is not the first time you’ve felt them.” ~JM Storm

18. “Do you think the universe fights for souls to be together?
Some things are too strange and strong to be coincidences.” ~Emery Allen

19. “I got a little close and that is all it took. I was captured. Because sometimes that is what happens when the heart recognizes home.” ~JM Storm

20. “They knew it. Time, distance, nothing could separate them because they knew. It was right. It was real.” ~Meg Ryan, Sleepless in Seattle

Falling For Her Quotes

21. “They told me that to make her fall in love, I had to make her laugh. But every time she laughs, I’m the one who falls in love.” ~Tommaso Ferraris

22. “And in her smile, I see something more beautiful than the stars.” ~Beth Revis, Across the Universe

23. “She is delightfully chaotic; a beautiful mess. Loving her is a splendid adventure.” ~Steve Maraboli

24. “I love how she makes me feel like anything is possible, or like life is worth it.” ~Tom Hansen, 500 Days Of Summer

25. “He stepped down, trying not to look long at her, as if she were the sun, yet he saw her, like the sun, even without looking.” ~Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina

26. “He sweeps her hair back from her ears; he swings her above his head. He says she is his émerveillement. He says he will never leave her, not in a million years.” ~Anthony Doerr, All the Light We Cannot See

27. “To love her is to dance to whatever music her heart is playing.” ~John Green

28. “I never saw so sweet a face. As that I stood before. My heart has left its dwelling place … and can return no more.” ~John Clare

29. “I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it.” ~Nicolas Cage, City of Angels

30. “But to see her was to love her, love but her, and love her forever” ~Robert Burns

Falling For Him Quotes

31. “I do believe his mouth is heaven, his kisses falling over me like stars.” ~Richard Siken, Saying Your Names

32. “but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you’ve discovered something you don’t even have a name for” ~Richard Siken, You Are Jeff

33. “He’s more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” ~Catherine Earnshaw, Wuthering Heights

34. “I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t do anything but think about him. At night I dream of him, all day I wait to see him, and when I do see him my heart turns over and I think I will faint with desire.” ~Philippa Gregory, The Other Boleyn Girl

35. “…the thought of him gone—no more—makes your chest tighten up and maybe this is your fairytale. Maybe this is your castle.” ~Charlotte Eriksson

36. “If you press me to say why I loved him, I can say no more than because he was he, and I was I.” ~Michel de Montaigne

37. “She loved him, there was no question about that. But she loved him in a way that he had yet to understand. Yet, she loved him anyway.” ~JM Storm

38. “and every night she would change herself, stay up late and grow deeper in love.” ~R.M Drake

39. “She knew one hundred little things about him, but when he kissed her she couldn’t remember her own name.” ~Michelle Hodkin

40. “She belonged to him. Not because it was something he demanded, but because it was something she couldn’t help.” ~JM Storm

Falling For You Quotes

41. “I realized I was thinking of you, and I began to wonder how long you’d been on my mind. Then it occurred to me: Since I met you, you’ve never left.” ~Unknown

42. “Sometimes your nearness takes my breath away and all the things I want to say can find no voice. Then in silence, I can only hope my eyes will speak my heart.” ~Robert Sexton

43. “I keep myself busy with things to do, but every time I pause I still think of you..” ~Cecelia Ahern

44. “I swear I couldn’t love you more than I do right now, and yet I know I will tomorrow.“ ~Leo Christopher

45. “If I had a flower for every time I thought of you, I could walk in my garden forever.” ~Alfred Lord Tennyson

46. “If I know what love is, it is because of you.” ~Herman Hesse

47. “You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I’ve ever had.” ~Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

48. “And I’m feeling it’ll just be you. All of my life…” ~Stephen Bishop, All of My Life

49. “For you see, each day I love you more. Today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.” ~Rosemonde Gerard

50. “My love for you has no depth, its boundaries are ever-expanding.” ~Christina White

51. “You’re always the first and the last thing on this heart of mine. No matter where I go, or what I do, I’m thinking of you.” ~Dierks Bentley

Final Thoughts

Sometimes, our words get jumbled up and we can’t find the right things to say to the person we love. We may also want to relive memories through words and find that strong emotion we once felt before.

We hope these 51 in love quotes were able to trigger your fondest of memories and help you find what you were looking for.

21 Foods That Boost Metabolism to Lose Weight Fast

January 9, 2019 by Power of Positivity

With the New Year upon us, many of us are thinking of ways we can lose weight or just get healthier overall. Thanks to our recent indulgences, some of us are left with sluggish metabolism and pants that fit a little too tightly.

With the adoption of New Year’s resolutions, you might be on the lookout for tasty foods that also boost your metabolism. A healthy metabolism is an integral part of good health; let’s read on to discover what Mother Nature has already provided.

Here are 21 foods that boost that fat burning furnace:

What Role Does Metabolism Play In My Health?

Metabolism is a two-part process consisting of anabolism and catabolism. During anabolism, energy is created and stored in your body. Catabolism releases that energy. Your body works to convert everything you ingest into some form of energy. Your body will use some of this energy immediately while your body stores some for later. The faster your metabolism, the faster you can burn calories, even while sleeping.

While everyone burns calories at a slightly different rate, certain factors affect its function. These include genetics, age, gender, and weight. You can either increase your energy production by eating the right foods, or make it even more sluggish by ingesting the wrong combinations. Why not crank it up a notch? Eat the following, and you’ll shed some of those unwanted pounds in no time:

Almonds

Almonds are the perfect portable snack. Power-packed with healthy fat, protein, and fiber, all these elements keep you fuller longer. They also benefit your cardiovascular system; just 14 almonds a day can dramatically reduce your risk of heart attack and stroke! Use almonds for a mid morning pick me up. Munch on a few just before going to bed to tide you over until morning. Your heart and your waistline will thank you.

Asparagus

Asparagus is a low-calorie, nutrient dense food that will naturally detoxify your system. It will speed up your metabolism at the same time. This vegetable contains B2, known to increase metabolism by aiding the absorption of carbohydrates, proteins, and fats.

Beans

Beans are packed full of fiber, which helps to promote healthy digestion. They also contain resistant starch, which is linked to faster metabolism and reduced fat storage. Add a heaping helping of black beans to rice and chicken for a healthy, low-fat meal that will satisfy you on many levels.

Cruciferous Vegetables

All cruciferous vegetables—cauliflower, broccoli, and cabbage–have very high water and fiber content. This combination increases metabolic rate by over 30 percent.

Celery

One very thermogenic food, celery is a natural fat burner. Celery has very high levels of calcium, which inhibits the body’s ability to produce calcitrol, a hormone that promotes fat storage. Pack a few stalks in your lunch for a power-packed afternoon snack, and watch those pounds fly off!

Coconut Oil

Coconut oil’s unique chain of fatty acids provide a very powerful effect on the body. Just 15-30 grams of these fatty acids will create an overall burst of energy production by 5 percent, or 120 calories. Over time, this will compound itself and cause those extra pounds to drop.

Coffee

Coffee is a God-given gift that not only metabolizes fats, it can boost metabolism by as much as 11 percent. You no longer have to listen to those caffeine naysayers who preach the evils of excess consumption. Drink up!

Cucumbers

Cucumbers are a natural diuretic, and they will help hydrate your body while providing vitamins, nutrients, and dietary fiber. They are also rich in vitamin C, which will naturally boost metabolism.

Berries

Berries are very high in fiber, which acts like a fat-absorbing sponge as it moves through your digestive system, carrying excess baggage with it. Blueberries and raspberries in particular contain the flavonoid anthocyanin, which is known to boost metabolism.

Ginger

Ginger has long been used for its medicinal purposes. Recent studies have also revealed its metabolic benefits as well. One study performed in 2012 showed clear connections to a higher state of thermogenesis and lower levels of hunger. Add this pungent spice to many Asian dishes for a boost of flavor and fat burning benefits.

Green Tea

Consuming green tea is one of the easiest ways to stoke the fat burning furnace. Consumption of this delicious drink can increase fat burning benefits by as much as 4 percent over a 24 hour period, and its natural boost of caffeine keeps you mentally alert and ready for what your day throws at you.

Turkey

Turkey, known for its high protein and low fat content, is a great way to add lean muscle to your physique. A study performed at Pennington Biomedical Research center concluded that, among 16 adults who were fed excess calorie diets, those who consumed higher levels of protein and leaner foods stored those extra calories as lean muscle, not fat. Bring on the drumsticks!

Citrus Fruit

Lemons, limes, and grapefruit not only have an invigorating and refreshing flavor, they are natural fat burners. High levels of vitamin C present in these fruits help to safeguard against insulin spikes that might cause excess fat storage.

Oatmeal

Oatmeal is a well-respected health food; with its high fiber content and presence of beta glucan, it will aid in keeping hypertension, insulin resistance and high levels of fat in the blood at bay. As little as one bowl per day will keep you full and satisfied for hours and balance out your blood sugar, making you less prone to snacking between meals.

Peppers

A chemical compound in peppers called capsaicin is known to increase heart rate and boost metabolism. In fact, studies show that consumption of capsaicin will increase metabolic rate by as much as 20 percent within a few hours after ingestion. Peppers with a heat factor also crank up the fat burning furnace in your body, burning more calories per hour than mild peppers in comparison. Don’t be afraid to make those taste buds sizzle as you burn off those extra pounds. Can you stand the heat?

Spinach

Chowing down on that spinach salad will give you an extra dose of magnesium, a crucial mineral for a healthy body. Lightly steamed spinach with a lightly seared chicken breast makes a delicious and satisfying dinner as well. People who consume adequate magnesium are less likely to develop type 2 diabetes.

Water

Never underestimate the power of a fresh glass of water! It is recommended that a person drink half his or her own body weight in ounces daily. It may seem excessive at first, but this recommendation is based on bringing your body and all of its systems into a state of optimum efficiency. Drinking lots of water not only aids the body in organizing its own natural detoxification process, it is known to boost metabolism by as much as 30 percent!

Salmon

Rich in omega 3 fatty acids and dripping with protein, salmon can boost natural fat burning enzymes in the body. Metabolic rate improves by as much as 400 calories daily; find a grocer that offers fresh fillets on a regular basis and make this a staple in your new, clean diet.

Apples and Pears

Apples and pears have known weight loss benefits. Both are rich in fiber and have a high water content which promote fat burning. The phrase, “an apple a day” takes on a new meaning as we see those who consume 2-3 pieces of this fruit daily drop some serious weight.

Soup

Whether you eat warm soup in the dead of winter or a nice, cool gazpacho in the summertime, soup will fill you up while slimming you down. There is no shortage of delicious flavors and combinations that become available to you as you sip and savor a cup, a bowl, or a whole tureen of your favorite. If you have a sweet tooth that must be indulged, then try a blended fruit soup, which is not only refreshing but deliciously nutritious as well. Stay away from the cream-based soups, and opt instead for powerful combinations of veggies, lean proteins, and wholesome broth. Yummy!

With all of these options for getting healthy while burning fat, it seems that there is an abundance of food that you can choose from to chow down and slim down. Now the only question that remains is, do you have the willpower to stay away from those foods that can slow down your system? The New Year is upon us, and it’s a perfect time to change your eating habits, incorporate some exercise and movement into your daily routine, and watch that waistline dwindle away! Best of luck to you as you uncover your best self this year!

5 Hidden Behaviors of An Emotional Manipulator

January 9, 2019 by Power of Positivity

An emotional manipulator is an incredibly difficult person to deal with. They drain your energy, they’re exhausting to be around, and they can bring your self-esteem down quickly. The worst part is that you may not even notice what they are doing.

Emotional manipulation is toxic. As such, it’s important that you recognize when someone in your life has a pattern of manipulating you and those around them. This will prevent you from getting hurt or being dragged into unwanted situations.

In order to avoid the negative effects of being around people like this, you need to be aware of the warning signs and red flags. Here are some hidden behaviors of an emotional manipulator to keep an eye out for.

Here Are 5 Hidden Behaviors Of An Emotional Manipulator

1. Everything is about them

An emotional manipulator constantly needs to make everything that is happening relevant to them. It’s like they’re always demanding for all eyes to be on them. They want sympathy, attention, and open, willing ears all at once.

Since no one is always naturally in the spotlight, an emotional manipulator is willing to perform a variety of toxic behaviors in order to keep themselves there. Here are some ways a person like this would make everything about them.

a) One-upping

If you tell an emotional manipulator about something negative happening in your life, they’ll be sure to inform you of how much worse they have it. They’ll imply that your problems are nothing compared to theirs in an effort to gain your sympathy.

Basically, these people turn misery and suffering into a contest instead of recognizing that everyone’s problems are just as valid as their own. They’ll inform you that you have no right to complain because they want the attention you’re receiving.

b) Craving Attention

An emotional manipulator will make up all sorts of stories in order to gain attention. They’ll exaggerate their stories, interrupting other people’s stories to tell their own, made-up “better” ones.

You may notice that, when you’re around an emotional manipulator, you find yourself always listening and never getting a chance to speak.

c) Playing The Martyr

When an emotional manipulator seems to agree to do something positive, things might seem good at first. Whether it’s volunteering, helping someone out, or taking on an extra task, they’ll seem eager to assist.

But then, things go bad – fast. The person begins to complain about all the work they have to do. They act like they’re taking on a huge burden and constantly demand praise from everyone around them. Needless to say, they pretend they’re not reluctant at all and really want to help. Because they’re good actors, you might think they’re just a good person with positive thinking … until the complaining begins.

2. Twisting words, facts, and situations

Facts are the enemy of an emotional manipulator because they prove that their actions are wrong. This is why many individuals who seek to psychologically manipulate others try to twist facts, statements, and even incidents in their favor. Here are some ways they do so.

a) Gaslighting

Gaslighting is an act whereby someone attempts to trick those around them into questioning their perception of reality. If you confront an emotional manipulator about something, they will lie and twist everything to make it look like you’re wrong and they’re right. This means that an emotional manipulator may:

Lie about a sequence of events
Make you believe you said something you didn’t
Convince you that you misheard, misspoke, or misremembered something
Insist that your problems aren’t real

This is very dangerous and toxic behavior to be around. It can make you question your sanity. A manipulator will do this to take advantage of you and make you believe you’re crazy. It’s a very dangerous tactic

b) Playing the victim

Emotional manipulators want you to know that they are never, ever in the wrong. They are quick to blame others and insist that nothing is ever their fault. No matter what they’ve done, they’ll be sure to point fingers at everyone except themselves.

If an emotional manipulator fails to complete a task, they will blame your high expectations of them. When their partner breaks up with them, they will call them afraid of commitment. If they make you angry, they will say you are too sensitive. If they get fired, their boss was a jerk.

Basically, emotional manipulators never take responsibility for their mistakes. They refuse to be held accountable and will be the first to throw others under the bus to protect themselves.

c) Outright lying

Emotional manipulators will lie to your face with no remorse. Many of them have symptoms of pathological lying and may fib compulsively. They might:

Twist your words to make you sound bad
Exaggerate situations and spin them in their favor
Claim to forget information that they should know
Make excuses that aren’t valid
Justify their negative behavior

Be careful when listening to an emotional manipulator. If you’re remembering what happened completely differently from how they claim things went down, they could be lying to you.

d) Playing dumb

Pretending not to know something can make someone look innocent. This is probably why emotional manipulators do this so often. They play “dumb” in order to be released from obligations or hide truths. Seeing as they know nothing, how can they be in the wrong?

3. They fight unfairly

We know that disagreements are a part of life. But there are healthy, effective, and efficient ways to have a fair and reasonable argument.

According to Preston Ni, who works at Foothill College in their Communication Studies Department, an emotional manipulator does not abide by these methods. Instead, they go out of their way to use any unfair tactics they can to gain higher ground over those they argue with. Here’s how they might do so.

a) Taking you out of your element

When someone wants to manipulate you and win a debate, they’ll want to be on their home turf. Someone who only ever wants to pick a fight with you in their home, office, or personal “territory” is trying to gain a psychological upper hand.

b) Listening first

At first, it seems like someone’s decision to listen to what you have to say first is a positive thing. But they’re not just trying to hear you out – they’re mentally memorizing your points in your argument and finding ways to refute them.

Emotional manipulators also use this opportunity to catch a glimpse into your personal ideals and perspectives, so they can evaluate your weaknesses and strengths.

This tactic is used by those in sales and marketing, too. It’s definitely not pleasant coming from someone who isn’t trying to sell you anything more than a manipulative argument.

c) Aggression

Sometimes, manipulators try to intimidate you or make you feel uncomfortable by being overly aggressive. They might use strong, harsh language, gesture in wild or fierce ways, or speak very loudly in order to derail any chance at a fair discussion.

d) Information overload

There’s nothing wrong with using facts to support an argument. In fact, it’s recommended and a great way to have a good discussion. But manipulators will use only “alleged” factual information with no proof in their arguments.

This means an emotional manipulator might throw out random statistics and present inaccurate data repeatedly to overwhelm you and pressure you into believing them. They don’t seek to educate you – only to win with falsehood.

e) Pressure

It’s reasonable to expect a person to need some time to think about making a decision or coming up with a response. An emotional manipulator will relentlessly pressure you to make a choice before you’re comfortable.

This is because this pressure creates a sense of urgency that is entirely false, prompting tension that might just make you give in to their argument or desires.

4. Guilt tripping

The ever-famous guilt trip is a tactic utilized by most emotional manipulators. It involves trying to make you feel guilty for something that happens in order to gain an upper hand and make you fold to them.

If you feel bothered by something they do, they will try to make you feel guilty and unreasonable for feeling that way. When you have plans that don’t involve them, they will act upset and claim that you care about others more than them. If they make a mistake, they’ll tell you how hard they tried and how awful it feels to fail.

An emotional manipulator is always ready to turn something positive into something negative. They are experts at using your conscience against you, prompting you to feel guilty even when you have done nothing wrong.

If you find that the person you’re around always makes you feel like you’re in the wrong, you are likely dealing with an emotional manipulator. The same goes for someone who makes you feel bad just because you’re having fun or enjoying yourself.

You should also watch out for an emotional manipulator who makes sure they always sound sweet and genuine, no matter what. They might pretend to be concerned about you but then they’ll say something that subtly provides a guilt trip and makes you feel bad.

This type of behavior is often overlooked because an emotional manipulator will look and sound sincerely kind and thoughtful when they do this; however, their end goal is still to guilt trip you into doing what they want.

5. Judging and criticizing constantly

Everything you do can be wrong in the eyes of an emotional manipulator. Many people who behave this way are seeking to control you. They can do so by making you feel insecure and constantly criticizing your actions.

The worst part is that this behavior likely ties in with the other four behaviors we’ve discussed. This means an emotional manipulator might tell you that you take things too seriously when you get upset. They might encourage you to lighten up and learn to take a joke. They may tell you that you need to work on your positive thinking.

However it plays out, being the subject of judgment from an emotional manipulator is toxic and isn’t easy to avoid. You will have to actively work to cut that person off or allow their criticisms to go unacknowledged.

Final Thoughts On Hidden Behaviors Of An Emotional Manipulator

Emotional manipulation is a kind of abuse often overlooked. Many people make the mistake of believing that, because it is a non-physical form of negative behavior, it isn’t that serious. This is far from the truth.

An emotional manipulator can ruin your self-esteem, make you feel inadequate, and cause crippling self-doubt. As such, keeping an eye out for these 5 hidden behaviors of an emotional manipulator will help you protect yourself against this serious form of toxicity.

21 High Protein Foods For Weight Loss

January 9, 2019 by Power of Positivity

High protein foods are an important macro-nutrient that helps our bodies recovery from strenuous activities such as running or lifting weights as well as from normal everyday wear and tear. Without protein, our bodies would not be able to function properly.

When most people think of high protein foods, they typically think of meat. For a vegan trying to lead a healthy lifestyle, while losing a bit of weight, this doesn’t help much. What many are unaware of though is that there are plenty of non-animal-based high protein foods that are perfectly fit for a vegan diet!

Read on for a list of 21 great vegan high protein foods that aid in weight loss:

1. Seitan

Seitan is one of the most popular sources of protein amongst vegan and vegetarian dieters, and with good reason!

Commonly marketed as a meat alternative, Seitan is made from wheat gluten. One 3.5 ounce serving can provide you with 25 grams of protein, making it the richest plant-based protein source!

Aside from Seitan’s high protein content, it is also a great source of selenium while also containing a good amount of calcium, iron, and phosphorus!

2. Lentils

Lentils are one of the healthiest foods you can eat, whether you’re a vegan or an avid meat eater! Coming in at 18 grams of protein per cup cooked, lentils and an amazing source of vegan protein!

Lentils are incredibly versatile and lend themselves well to a range of dishes, from soups to salads, stews and curries!

Lentils are also a great source of fiber which is vital for satiety and gut health and contain the vitamins folate, iron, and manganese in substantial amounts!

3. Tofu

Tofu is a good product produced by the fermentation of soybeans. This soy product is one of the few complete proteins available to those following a vegan diet and so should be a regular feature of yours! A complete protein is a food that provides your body with all of the amino acids deemed essential for health.

Tofu by itself has a mild flavor and is easily able to absorb the flavors of other ingredients it is used with. This makes it incredibly versatile!

4. Chickpeas

One cup of cooked chickpeas packs a whopping 15 grams of protein! Like other beans and legumes, chickpeas are high in fiber as well which makes them a great addition to anyone’s diet!

Besides chickpeas’ high protein and fiber content, they’re also an amazing source of iron, phosphorus, folate,
potassium, manganese, amongst many other beneficial nutrients!

Several studies have been done that indicate a diet rich in beans or legumes can help control blood sugar levels, lower your blood pressure, and decrease cholesterol!

5. Spelt and Teff

Spelt and teff belong to a category of food commonly referred to as ancient grains. Both spelt and teff pack a whopping 11 grams of protein per cooked cup, making them a great source of protein for the vegan looking to lose a bit of weight!

Fiber, complex carbs, iron, magnesium, manganese, and phosphorus are all found in high amounts in both spelt and teff, making them a very nutrient dense and healthy protein rich food choice

6. Nutritional Yeast

Nutritional yeast is sold in either powder or flake form and is made from a deactivated strain of Saccharomyces cerevisiae yeast. It is commonly used as a cheese substitute and can be enjoyed in dishes such as mashed potatoes or can be sprinkled on top of pasta in place of cheese.

Nutritional Yeast is another complete protein source and per one ounce serving it contains 14 grams of protein plus 7 grams of fiber! You can find fortified versions of nutritional yeast that make it also a great source of magnesium, zinc, copper, manganese, and all the essential B vitamins!

7. Green Peas

A single serving of green peas contains more than 25% of the fiber you need in a day! Packing 9 grams of protein per cup cooked, peas are a nutritional powerhouse and a great addition to anyone’s diet!

Besides being a great source of fiber and protein, green peas contain Vitamins A, C, K, folate, thiamine, and manganese in substantial amounts!

8. Hempseed

Hempseeds are the seeds of the Cannabis Sativa plant, known more commonly as marijuana! No need to worry about catching a buzz, hempseeds contain only minuscule amounts of THC, the active compound in Cannabis that produces its euphoric effects.

Hempseeds are another great complete source of vegan protein, containing 10 grams per one ounce serving. Hempseeds are also a great source of iron, magnesium, calcium, zinc, and selenium and also contain omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids in the ideal ratio for human health!

9. Sprouted Grain Breads

Bread made from sprouted grains are typically much higher in protein and fiber, making them a great option for a vegan looking to drop a few pounds. It’s not uncommon to find wheat, barley, millet, spelt as well as lentils and even soybeans in just a single loaf of sprouted grain bread!

A typical serving of sprouted grain bread can contain up to or more than 8 grams of protein, which is significantly more than what’s commonly found in bread.

10. Spirulina

Spirulina is a blue-green colored algae that is packed with nutrients and protein. Two tablespoons contain 8 grams of complete protein as well as many other nutrients; Iron, thiamin, copper, magnesium, riboflavin, manganese, and potassium are all found in substantial quantities!

Spirulina also contains Phycocyanin, a powerful anti-inflammatory with antioxidant and anti-cancer properties!

11. Soy Milk

One cup of soy milk contains 7 grams of protein, making it a great vegan alternative to cow’s milk! Soy milk is commonly fortified with other vitamins and essential nutrients such as vitamins D, B12, and calcium!

If you’re trying to lose weight, avoid the sweetened varieties and opt for an unsweetened version. Unsweetened soy milk is much lower in calories and makes it easier to fit it into your diet!

12. Oatmeal

Oatmeal is one of the healthiest complex carbohydrate sources available but did you know that it also contains 6 grams of protein and 4 grams of fiber per half cup serving? Moreover, oatmeal is a great addition to a vegan diet; it’s packed with essential nutrients and provides long-lasting satiety.

Vitamins found in abundance in oatmeal include zinc, magnesium, phosphorus, and folate.

13. Chia Seeds

Chia seeds hail from Mexico and Guatemala and are sourced from the Salvia hispanica plant. Containing an astounding 13 grams of fiber and 6 grams of protein per 1.25 ounce serving, chia seeds are hard to pass up when filling out a vegan diet!

They’re very mild in taste and so go well with almost everything! Containing iron, calcium, magnesium, selenium, and omega-3 fatty acids, chia seeds really are a superfood!

14. Wild Rice

Compared to other long-grain rice types, wild rice contains over 1.5 times the protein, including both brown and basmati rice! One prepared up of wild rice contains a healthy amount of fiber as well as magnesium, manganese, copper, phosphorus, and B vitamins. With 7 grams of protein provide per cup, wild rice is an excellent option for anyone’s diet

Like brown rice, wild rice is not stripped of the bran which contains the majority of the vitamins, minerals, and fiber found in rice. This makes it an easy choice over white rice among carbohydrate and protein rich foods.

15. Black Beans

Black beans are considered one of the healthiest beans and legumes, and is one of the greatest sources of antioxidants among them!

Less starchy than other beans, their dark color lends them to a much richer antioxidant content! Per half cup, black beans contain 8 grams of protein, making them the ideal choice for the vegan on a diet!

16. Quinoa

1 cup of Quinoa contains 8 grams of protein as well as magnesium, fiber, and antioxidants in good amounts! Technically a seed, but used similarly to other grains such as oats and wheat, quinoa is a great gluten-free, vegan, protein rich foods choice!

17. Artichokes

When one thinks high protein foods, artichokes usually doesn’t cross one’s mind. A half-cup serving of artichoke hearts contains 4 grams of protein, which for a vegetable makes it a great choice for protein rich foods while on a vegan diet!

Regularly eating artichokes offers you a great opportunity to boost your fiber and protein intake while enjoying a lower calorie food that is still filling!

18. Amaranth

Similar to quinoa or teff, Amaranth is lumped into the ancient grain category and offers numerous nutritional benefits. 1 prepared cup of amaranth packs 7 grams of protein, making for an excellent protein source for the vegan looking to drop a few pounds.

Amaranth is also a great source of B vitamins as well as magnesium and iron, making it nutrient dense!

19. Pumpkin Seeds

Pumpkin seeds don’t usually make it on the vegan’s radar but should not be overlooked! In just a quarter cup, pumpkin seeds pack a whopping 8 grams of protein!

An excellent source of iron and magnesium, pumpkin seeds are a great, portable, vegan snack that is hard to pass up!

20. Tempeh

Tempeh, similar to seitan or tofu, is derived from the soybean. It is fermented which makes it high in probiotics and easier to digest than many other protein rich foods.

Per 1 cup serving, tempeh contains 12 grams of protein! Tempeh is low in calories and is one of the best sources of vegan proteins available.

21. Spinach

Spinach is a very low calorie leafy green vegetable that makes a great addition to the vegan diet. Per cup, spinach contains 5 grams of protein as well as many other essential nutrients, which makes for an excellent option to anyone’s diet!

Wrapping Things Up

When people think about the vegan diet, they don’t typically associate it with high protein foods. This does not have to be the case though!

With so many great tasting, healthy vegan options for high protein foods, there really is no excuse for anyone to be deficient in protein!

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Every day is a day to shine. Shine on!

Why do we consider the Dalai Lama a Socially Intelligent Person?

We’ll also define the subcomponents of each group.

Self-perception

Self-expression

Interpersonal

Decision-making

Stress management

5 Ways to Become More Socially Intelligent

Have an ‘outsider’s awareness.’

Fine-tune your assertiveness

Practice virtual social intelligence

Be yourself (cliché!)

Practice active listening to become more socially intelligent

Here are 5 telltale signs of a strong woman:

1. She respects herself and others.

2. She’s independent.

3. She knows how to control her emotions.

4. A strong woman takes risks.

5. She tries to remain positive.

Other Key Traits of a Strong Woman

Final Thoughts on Signs of a Strong Woman

51 Falling in Love Quotes That Will Give You Butterflies

Falling at First Sight Quotes

Soulmates Falling in Love Quotes

Falling For Her Quotes

Falling For Him Quotes

Falling For You Quotes

Final Thoughts

Here are 21 foods that boost that fat burning furnace:

What Role Does Metabolism Play In My Health?

Almonds

Asparagus

Beans

Cruciferous Vegetables

Celery

Coconut Oil

Coffee

Cucumbers

Berries

Ginger

Green Tea

Turkey

Citrus Fruit

Oatmeal

Peppers

Spinach

Water

Salmon

Apples and Pears

Soup

Here Are 5 Hidden Behaviors Of An Emotional Manipulator

1. Everything is about them

a) One-upping

b) Craving Attention

c) Playing The Martyr

2. Twisting words, facts, and situations

a) Gaslighting

b) Playing the victim

c) Outright lying

d) Playing dumb

3. They fight unfairly

a) Taking you out of your element

b) Listening first

c) Aggression

d) Information overload

e) Pressure

4. Guilt tripping

5. Judging and criticizing constantly

Final Thoughts On Hidden Behaviors Of An Emotional Manipulator

1. Seitan

2. Lentils

3. Tofu

4. Chickpeas

5. Spelt and Teff

6. Nutritional Yeast

7. Green Peas

8. Hempseed

9. Sprouted Grain Breads

10. Spirulina

11. Soy Milk

Rise and Shine On!
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