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Are You Afraid Of Falling In Love? 5 Ways To Let Go

Vulnerability. We resist it. That’s why it can be so scary to open yourself up. Falling in love marks a transition, and it’s only natural that you’d be afraid of potential failure.

Whether you’ve been hurt in the past or just aren’t sure you’re prepared to fall in love, you could be missing out on someone who can take your life to a new level. If you’ve found yourself avoiding social interactions or staying away from those to whom you know you’re attracted deep down inside, there are five ways to let go of the fear and enjoy the excitement only romance has to offer.

Are you afraid of falling in love? Here are 5 ways to let go of that fear:

1. Learn to Love Yourself

You can’t fall in love with someone else if you don’t love yourself . Yes, most of us feel like we value ourselves, but to truly love yourself is another concept altogether.

How to Love Yourself

If you haven’t yet mastered loving yourself, this is a critical step that’s all too often skipped. Just a few ways to make sure you’re comfortable enough in your own skin to fall in love include:

  • You take time to do things you love.
  • Get enough exercise.
  • You allow time to yourself in your busy schedule.
  • You’re thankful for the blessings in your life.

2. Set Your Boundaries Early

All too often, we get caught up in the excitement of a new relationship. During this “honeymoon period,” it can be easy to overlook our own boundaries and let seemingly little things slip by. The trouble is, once the relationship progresses, you’ve already given the green light to behaviors you don’t approve of.

It can be confusing to your partner to suddenly find you want to change them when these things didn’t bother you before. It’s important to set these boundaries early on in the relationship. If they can’t handle it, you can go your separate ways now before you develop strong feelings that lead to years of hurt.

3. Be Prepared to Give Away Some of Your Freedom

Falling in love requires accepting that your time is not yours , at least not all of it. While it’s important to make time for yourself, you must keep in mind that you now have a romantic partner who has made the decision to make you their priority.

Balancing “Me Time” and “We Time

The trick is to balance “me time” and “we time”. Make time for nights out together, especially as the relationship progresses. However, let your partner know early on that you have your own interests and hobbies that are non-negotiable. If you’ve found the right one, they will be happy to accommodate your division of time.

4. Let Love Happen

One of the biggest mistakes those afraid of falling in love make is looking for love. Yes, it sounds confusing, but think about it. You can only learn so much about a person from an online dating profile. When you start seeking out love, you make the decision to pursue a romantic relationship too early.

It’s ideal to let love happen. Rather than seeking out a romantic partner, get involved in social events and situations in which you’ll meet new people. Do volunteer work. Join a book club. Exposure to new people over time allows you to meet and naturally get to know potential romantic partners without the pressures of being “on the prowl”.

5. Don’t Push the “L” Word

Yes, we want to feel loved, and we want to hear it expressed. However, this will happen when the time’s right. If you’ve been dating for less than a year, your partner may not have developed this level of feeling for you.

How to Tell the Love Isn’t There

While you shouldn’t push your partner to tell you they love you, make sure you’re not getting used. If they say they love you too soon, they could be using the line to take advantage of you.

falling in love

If it’s been over a year with no expression of love, it may not be there, or they may be struggling with deep-rooted issues that should be discussed. Test the waters and get to know your partner. Either they just don’t have the feelings for you a partner should or you have a unique opportunity to grow even closer.

Let Your Vulnerability Shine

Falling in love requires allowing your vulnerability to shine. Yes, it’s scary. Nothing easy is worth doing, and falling in love has plenty of lifelong benefits. From sharing your time together to leaning on each other for support and more, the risk can very well prove to be worth it.

By following these five tips, you can be on your way to finding lasting love. Can you get hurt along the way? Sure. However, when you do it right, you can get back on your feet and try again. When you love yourself and learn how to let go of the past, the sky’s the limit.

4 Easy Ways to Lose A Beer Belly

Here’s a scenario that gets played out a lot: a gal or guy notices a bit of a beer belly hanging out around the waistline; so, the said gal or guy joins a gym or buys a bunch of equipment with the intent of getting rid of said beer belly. The gal or guy is hitting it hard, every day, doing what they’ve set out to do.

There’s just one small problem: while they see improvements in pretty much every other area of their body, they can’t seem to get rid of that belly. What in the h-e-c-k is going on?

Welcome to Stubbornfatville. Population: Everyone. Yes, everybody seems to have problem areas that don’t seem to want to cooperate with their “get my a** in shape” motivation.

The most common culprit? The dreaded Beer belly a.k.a. “Keg” or “Beer Storage Unit.” While this seems to be a problem for just about everyone, it is arguably more prominent in men. (There’s a good reason it is called “beer belly” and not “wine belly,” after all.)

Why is fat harder to lose in some areas of the body, specifically the belly? For the sake of not turning this article into a physiology paper, suffice it to say that the fat-burning “receptors” found in cells are far sparser in trouble areas.

Traditionally, for men, two significant problem areas are the belly and lower back. For most women, these areas are the butt, hips, and thighs. But belly fat is undoubtedly the most commonly shared problem area between the sexes.

But you needn’t worry. Regardless of whatever “bad hand” your genetics or body type have dealt, there are indeed easy ways to help you lose the beer belly.

Here are four ways to lose your beer belly:

  1. Get caffeine

Caffeine is a proven substance when it comes to accelerating fat loss. How proven? Well, consider that nearly every good fat-loss product contains a heavy dose of it. It isn’t necessary to spend 50 to 100 bucks on the “latest and greatest” overly-hyped, heavily marketed weight loss supplement, however.

Caffeine works by increasing the output of epinephrine in the blood. Epinephrine is transported quickly to fat tissues, which are then “instructed” to begin dissolving fats and releasing them into the bloodstream. Of course, this release – in and of itself – works far better when coupled with regular exercise.

Speaking of which…

  1. Have fun with exercise

Sure, you can probably lose weight without exercise – but it’s most certainly not a good idea. There are two good reasons (probably many more) why it’s counterproductive to lay off working out.

First, even if you do lose weight, you’ll end up mostly losing muscle and shedding water weight instead of fat. As a result, you lose strength and fail to target those problem areas.

Second, there is nothing better for your health and well-being than regular exercise. Numerous studies conclude that exercise improves brain function, reduces fatigue, and lowers the risk of cancer. Exercise also promotes heart health and may lower cholesterol.

While it seems overly obvious to include exercise as a prescription for losing belly fat, you’d be surprised how many people rely on diet alone or, worse, buy into the “lose weight fast without lifting a finger!” malarkey.

Regardless if you’re a regular gym-goer or just starting out, here is a solid piece of advice: do something fun! Bike, play basketball, go hiking, take up tennis, or walk around a beautiful park. You’re far more likely to stick with exercise if it boosts your mood!

  1. Do Planks

If you’re going to lose that beer belly, you’re much better off mixing in some effective abdominal exercises. The basic plank may be the most effective core conditioning exercise of them all. Just make sure that you’re also performing other ab movements. Here’s how to perform a plank:

  • Lie face down on the floor, in a “pre-pushup” position, palms flat against the floor or mat.
  • Keeping your upper and lower body straight and rigid, lift yourself up using your forearms. (The upper arms and forearms should form a near-perfect 90-degree angle.)
  • Supporting your entire body with your forearms and toes, keep your body as straight as possible from head to toe.
  • Engage your abdominal muscles by sucking in your belly inwards towards your spine. Hold this position for 30 to 60 seconds.
  1. Leave sugar alone

We’ve said this before, but here it is again: manufactured sugar is an utterly worthless ingredient. It has no dietary value and is harmful to health. Per Harvard Medical School, the leading sources of foods with added sugar include candy, cakes, cookies, cereal, soft drinks (including so-called “sports” and “energy” drinks), and processed foods. Harvard goes on to state that people who derive more than 17 percent of their calories from sugar are at nearly a 40-percent higher risk of death from heart disease.

beer belly

Per a study published in the journal Nutrients, added sugars are tied to an “increased risk of a variety of chronic disease including obesity, cardiovascular disease, diabetes and non-alcoholic fatty liver disease (NAFLD).” Health experts believe that sugar’s effect on insulin resistance and blood sugar levels give way to craving unhealthy foods; and hence, obesity.

A good rule of thumb is to prioritize natural sugars, such as those found in fruits and vegetables.

Foods to lose weight

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Why Self Love Is The Real True Love

One day, you find someone who’s the most wonderful person you’ve ever met. Everything seems flawless, almost too good to believe. You’re genuinely ecstatic; your radiance is noticeable from miles away. Each one of your friends adores this new person in your life, besides a couple of skeptics. Still, you work to assure yourself that any naysayers are just jealous of your true love.

Over time, the relationship has started to level off, or even diminish. The opinions of the skeptical ones occur to resonate even more profoundly. But a voice inside is sounding for you to keep on, to not give in just yet.

Here’s why self love is the real true love:

True love happens when two people are comfortable in their own skin, as well as to each other. True love develops only after allowing your own happiness to be a high priority. Most of us are too scared to deal with or accept the flaws that we frequently fall for people for all the wrong reasons.

Whether it’s to combat loneliness, to comfort, or to ease the pain away, happiness means a lot more when it’s earned as a consequence of working toward becoming the best version of yourself. Everyone changes over the years. Be the one that grows, not the one who sinks. Discover what makes you endeavor for greatness worth it, what gets you mad, and what makes you fall in love with yourself.

Break out of your comfort zones, think positive thoughts, explore your passions, continuously succeed, and bomb until you hit the bottom. After you’ve achieved this level of mindfulness, your connection with other people, and the search for your true love will be more likely to thrive instead of setting you back.

The only game no one can ever master is time. We deal with this by pushing ahead, without regard to the situations that arise. How many instances can you remember where you got mad at yourself for fumbling chances, opportunities, people or for getting attached to the past and letting it affect your future?

Learn to let go, find out more about yourself, and let your smile shine. Happiness has to be your greatest project and it merely necessitates a single pair of hands: your own.

Long Run

We usually concentrate too much on the present and too scarcely in the future. The moment right now should feel right; it’s to be enjoyed at that moment. It shouldn’t be used for the objective of filling a void.

That kind of action doesn’t do anything but give a temporary satisfaction for emotional needs created in the past. As the hollow space arises, a new need will always find a way in. Build the ability to regulate what puts you in a good mood. Handling your own prosperity and contentment should be a lifestyle decision.

true love

Envision your dreams and hold on to the ones that make you feel the kind of emotions you want. Change can only be from within otherwise it won’t last. It’s beneficial to focus on changes that propel us and allow us the motivation to feel fortunate.

If you get yourself into a place where you’re consistently looking for someone else to change, it’s a good time to cut your losses. Concentrate on recuperating from your own wounds before seeking to patch up someone else. No one is perfect, but there’s a fine line between rejecting the truth and settling for less just to feel good temporarily. Live without holding any regrets, just lessons you’ve learned.

Dig Deep

Recently a lot more people have been realizing that you attract what you are, not what you want. Do you know the feeling where you meet somebody and instantly feel the chemistry? That instantaneous, magnetic connection that is powerful and hard to neglect? The one that excites every one of your senses but can’t be described?

If you’re outstanding, you’ll draw outstanding people into your life. If you’re a mess, however, you’ll bring in a mess. Manage your problems to be more self-aware of where you have space for improvement. There’s nothing more satisfying than looking back on your life and seeing just how far you’ve come.

Strive to be in the kind of relationship where both people have identified themselves individually. Searching for this kind of clarity with someone else’s eyes will drive to a downward spiral of irregular contentment. Dive deep within yourself to find your true self.

It’s perfectly fine to stay single a little longer and love yourself. The act of being “in a relationship” shouldn’t indicate a dependence on someone else. It can instead be a signal of empowered togetherness and true love. Be selective and careful with the one who has the honor of holding your heart. Make your future a goal of choice, not luck.

12 Fabulous Quotes About Happiness To Keep You Happy And Positive

These quotes about happiness will certainly uplift your mood.

Happiness is surprisingly difficult to define. Most people accept the psychological definition: a pleasant feeling of well-being that can range from contentment to joy.

Greek philosophers, by contrast, defined happiness more broadly as “eudaimonia” or “flourishing.” They saw it as an activity rather than an emotional state. A happy person was somebody who led a good and fulfilling life. As can be seen by the following quotes about happiness, many people had opinions about what happiness was and how one could become happy.

Quotes About Happiness

Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.” – Aristotle

In 350 BC, the Greek philosopher Aristotle wrote the “Nicomachean Ethics,” which declared that happiness was the only thing people valued for its own sake. They valued other things like love or riches, because they believed such things would make them happy. Aristotle also believed that the best and happiest life was governed by reason.

positive thinking

Quotes About Happiness and Purpose

“Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.” – Joseph Addison

“Give a man health and a course to steer, and he’ll never stop to trouble about whether he’s happy or not.” — George Bernard Shaw

Many believe that people need a sense of purpose to be happy. They need to feel that their lives have meaning and are contributing in some way to their family or community. A person who feels they have a purpose is less stressed than somebody who sees their life as pointless. As Shaw stated, the former may be too busy following their passion to worry about happiness.

Happiness Quotes About Absence of Pain

Consider these wise words about being happy.

“Happiness is not being pained in body or troubled in mind.” – Thomas Jefferson

“Happiness? That’s nothing more than health and a poor memory.” – Albert Schweitzer

Both Jefferson and Schweitzer describe happiness in its most basic form as an absence of pain. It is very hard to be cheerful if you’re ill and feel physically wretched. Schweitzer’s sarcastic comment about a “poor memory” is actually true: Happy people do not brood on misfortunes or slights.

Attitudes That Lead to Joy

“Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be.” – Abraham Lincoln

“For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Philosophers tend to view happiness as an activity because it takes self-discipline to keep yourself from fretting or brooding over things outside your control. A happy person has learned better than to worry about things they can’t change.

“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.” – J.R.R. Tolkien

The above quote comes from “The Hobbit,” and the speaker is the dying Thorin Oakenshield, who regrets both his greed and his treatment of Bilbo Baggins, the titular hobbit. Thorin realized, belatedly, that gold is less likely to lead to happiness than are the simple pleasures of spending time with friends.

“If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never be fulfilled. If your happiness depends on money, you will never be happy with yourself. Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the world belongs to you.” – Lao Tzu

 

In 2010, researchers at the Woodrow Wilson School of Princeton University studied whether money was linked to happiness. They surveyed 450,000 people over two years. They found two forms of happiness: transient happy moods and a deeper, more constant satisfaction with one’s life. The latter was greatest in people earning around $75,000 per year. A person with that income could pay for their needed things and cover the occasional emergency. The researchers thus found that it is easier to be happy without continuous worry about bills. They also found that happiness had a plateau; people who had a lot of money were no happier than those who had enough to meet their needs.

money

Final Thoughts on Quotes About Happiness and Kindness

“Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.” – Buddha

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion” – Dalai Lama

“The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer someone else up.” Mark Twain

The above quotes define happiness as a way of life that satisfies people. The happy person has found a calling and is kind to others. As the last three quotes state, happy people share their good fortune and mood with other people. Helping another person increases satisfaction in both parties. The person helped gets whatever they need, while the helper gets the satisfaction of accomplishing something worthwhile.

Dietitians Explain 10 Foods That Make You Lose Weight Fast

When it comes right down to it, there are three fundamental rules regarding food and weight loss: choose a variety of healthy foods, eat 4-5 times per day, and drink plenty of water. In this article, we’ll focus on the first rule, but with a bit of an edge. We’ll talk about foods that will make you lose weight fast.

Without further ado, here are ten foods that will help you lose weight fast:

  1. Avocados

While it is true that avocados are high in fat, nearly all of it falls under the “healthy fats” umbrella. Two of the three fats – monounsaturated and polyunsaturated – are considered healthy and comprise 85 percent of the avocado’s fat content.

Avocados also contain anti-inflammatory properties. Additionally, these properties help stabilize blood pressure, lower “bad” cholesterol levels, and lower the risk of heart disease.

  1. Broccoli

Broccoli contains the “one-two fat loss punch”: low in calories and fat, and loaded with dietary fiber. Put simply, despite being a rather plain food, broccoli will fill you up and help you lose weight fast – without added calories.

Broccoli also contains a bunch of minerals, nutrients, and vitamins, including vitamin A, B2, B6, C, and K, folate, magnesium, and protein.

  1. Chia seeds

Omega fatty acids will help you lose weight fast. Mechanically, the omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids in chia seeds stimulate fat burning. They also activate enzymes that transport fat to be used for energy. More fat used to power cells means less fat stored in the belly!

Chia seeds are also loaded with fiber. Just two tablespoons contain 10 grams of quality fiber or 40 percent of the recommended daily allowance (RDA). They help you to lose weight fast.

  1. Cranberries

Cranberries are packed with vitamins and minerals. Also, the drink’s ursolic acid makes the cranberry a potent fat-fighting food. Ursolic acid, in numerous studies, demonstrates an ability to stimulate muscle growth, accelerate metabolic rate, and burn fat.

You only need a handful of cranberries for weight loss. Watch out for some cranberry drinks, because they often contain added sugars.

  1. Eggs

Let’s put this to rest once and for all: eggs are not bad for you! We have seen more flip-flopping about the healthy (or unhealthy) nature of eggs than about any other food.

Not only are eggs healthy, but they are also considered a “superfood,” meaning that they’re brimming with nutrients. In terms of weight loss, studies show that eating eggs for breakfast stabilizes insulin levels and curbs hunger, which will help you lose weight fast.

  1. Fatty fish

Here’s another food where scientists don’t seem to know what in the heck is going on at any given time. Fatty fish (e.g., salmon, mackerel, etc.) are awesome for weight loss. Rich in omega-3s, fatty fish provide quality protein, necessary to curb the appetite and build muscle.

Try having fish as an entree at least once per week. Your brain, heart, and tummy will thank you!

  1. Grapefruit

A groundbreaking 2004 study conducted by the Nutrition and Metabolic Research Center at Scripps Clinic in San Diego, California, found that adding grapefruit to one’s diet can ramp up weight loss in a serious way.

Eating half a grapefruit before each meal or drinking a serving of grapefruit juice three times a day helped participants lose an average of 3.6 and 3.3 pounds, respectively. Many of the study’s subjects lost more than ten pounds over a 12-week period!

  1. Lentils

Packed with fiber, lentils also contain a fair amount of protein. For vegans and vegetarians, lentils (along with soy) are two of the better plant-based sources of protein.

Lentils serve as an excellent fat-loss food because they stabilize blood sugar and are slow to digest. This means that you’re prone to fewer cravings and will probably eat less throughout the rest of the day.

  1. Oatmeal

Similar to lentils, oatmeal also takes a while to digest while helping normalize blood sugar levels. Oats contain a viscous gel formed by the submersion of soluble fibers, which helps to promote healthy digestion and lower cholesterol levels.

Oatmeal is also incredibly versatile in that you can add pretty much any fruit. Add some sliced apples for a serious weight loss combo!

lose weight fast

  1. Spiced foods

Eating foods that are flavored with black pepper or chili pepper may boost your metabolism by more than 20 percent! Researchers believe that spicy foods help you lose weight fast by increasing body temperature – a process known as thermogenesis.

Eating spicy food may also help promote satiety or the feeling of fullness. The active ingredient of chili peppers, called capsaicin, may also reduce LDL (“bad”) cholesterol levels and reduce inflammation.

Here Is Why You Should Stop Looking For A Soul Mate And Be Your Own

Are you searching to find your one true love or soulmate?

Most people cling to the idea of soulmates. That is to say, people who believe in soulmates believe that they only have one true love. However, research shows this is a disempowering way to think about love. It also leaves a person perpetually longing for someone to come along and complete him/ her. The truth is becoming a whole, the self-actualized person gives you a better chance of attracting the right person.

If you are one of those people who consider yourself unlucky in love and who may be wondering why it’s so difficult to attract a soulmate, continue reading. You may just decide that saving yourself for that one person may pale in comparison to becoming the person you were always meant to be.

“Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.”― Tina Fey, Bossypants

Here’s why you should be your own soulmate instead of looking for one:

soulmate

1. Mission Impossible: Attract Soulmate

Before you embark on your journey to the self, you must first know why you should forego finding your one true love, at least for now. If you believe in destiny, that is to say. It’s possible to attract a soulmate; you have less chance of finding lasting, fulfilling love.

The article points out that if you believe that your love has been fated, you will believe that any trouble your relationship encounters is the wrong relationship. In theory, you could go through relationship after relationship, constantly looking for the perfect relationship but never finding it. And you won’t because it doesn’t exist.

If instead, you approach relationships as if they’re a journey, then you stand a better chance of having a successful, long-lasting relationship. These relationships tend to last longer because the goal isn’t to have a perfect relationship or to find a soulmate but rather to experience a relationship that has the potential to make you grow.

2. Preventing Codependency

People who cannot be themselves tend to attract codependent relationships. The goal for these relationships is to keep the relationship together rather than forming a relationship that promotes growth for both people. If “attract soulmate at all costs” is your mission, you will be paying for a bad relationship for a long time.

Becoming codependent can happen anytime. However, some instances can make you even more prone to fall into the codependency trap. If you have no friends outside of the relationship or if you’re on the rebound, you’re probably not going to make the best relationship decisions. In both cases, you’re looking for someone to fill a need that you should be filling yourself.

Additionally, sometimes it’s good to learn to romance yourself. Simple acts, like taking yourself to lunch or wandering around your favorite bookstore, change your mindset. Falling in love with and romancing yourself helps you set the right expectations for future relationships: You show your subconscious mind how you expect someone else to treat you before you get into a relationship. If you do this, high expectations for how you want to be treated will come more automatically.

3. Learn What You Like

People often believe they know what they want in a relationship but don’t. This speaks to the codependency issue. However, it goes beyond codependency. If you have no sense of self and what you bring to a relationship, how can you know what you want a partner to give you?

soulmate

Additionally, you may not know what you want from life in general. This will have repercussions on your relationship as well. When you know what’s important to you, you spend time pursuing that passion. You take classes, meet up with like-minded people, etc. When you don’t know what fulfills you, you look to the person you’re with to fill that hole. But what happens when you discover that what you thought was your passion isn’t? You now have a relationship with a person who believes you are someone you are not. That kind of relationship rarely ends well.

Final Words

Searching for your soulmate can be a losing proposition. It’s not that you’ll never find a satisfying relationship. It’s just that when you do, you may ultimately end up being disappointed because people who look for a soulmate tend to have unrealistic relationship expectations. It’s better to approach a relationship like it’s a journey.

Moreover, having a healthy relationship is impossible if you’re not comfortable being single first. People who can’t be alone tend to attract codependent relationships. Instead of looking for a relationship, practice developing yourself. This teaches you what you want from a relationship, which puts you in a better position to have a good relationship when you finally have one.

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