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How to Release Emotional Attachments to Feeling Guilty

June 10, 2018 by Power of Positivity

Self-blame and feeling guilty are the most common reactions to something going wrong with your life. If you’ve done something bad, or something suddenly breaks down for no apparent reason, you always look for someone to blame. If there’s no other obvious option, that someone often turns out to be you. While it’s good to be self-reflective and aware of your own actions, guilt can be very damaging.

We can even feel guilt after things that people often find pleasurable – like going on a shopping spree or indulging in unhealthy food. That kind of attitude can only be detrimental to the way we experience pleasure and emotional attachment to people and activities. You’re not allowing yourself to be happy or to move on from something because of the residual guilt. Here are some tips to help you get rid of a guilt-ridden consciousness and move on with a positive mindset.

“Guilt is not a response to anger; it is a response to one’s own actions or lack of action.” – Audre Lorde

Here Are 6 Ways to Release Emotional Attachments to Feeling Guilty

1. Write it down.

This is the most rational approach to feeling guilty about something. Keep a journal about the things that make you feel guilty and the reasons why you feel guilty after doing them. Bullet journaling is a preferred form of journaling these days; however, you can also take notes in a notebook. That way, at the end of the day, you can look back at all the things that made you feel guilty and rationalize whether you need to experience that residual guilt at all. It also helps to show your notes to your friends or any other third parties that might not have the commitment you do to the things that make you feel guilty. They’ll give you a rational, outsider’s view of the situation and help you process your guilt in a healthy way.

2. Appreciate yourself and the things that you do every day.

Another way journaling can help you get over guilt is if you write down everything you did well during each day. Take notes of the things you achieved, or how you’ve been productive during the day, or what it was you did that will help you do better tomorrow. It’s a great way to go back to what you were feeling guilty about and remember there are many positive things in your world to look forward to. Teach yourself to focus on the positive things in life rather than the negative.

3. If it was your best friend instead of you, would you blame them the same way?

A great technique to rationalizing your self-deprecating thoughts is putting your friend or your partner or someone you really love in the same shoes as you. If they had done the same thing, would you approve of them feeling guilty? Would you feel like they can’t be forgiven? Nine times out of ten, you would give someone the benefit of doubt rather than convincing yourself that they have failed. So why can’t you do the same thing for yourself? It’s another technique you can use to learn being kinder and more patient with yourself.

4. Stop thinking in black and white.

No one is perfect. No one has an enviable life, and no one has it all figured out. Cut yourself some slack and remember that you are doing your best and that should be enough. Nothing is as clear-cut as being good or bad. There is a big grey area around most of what we do and experience in life. The sooner you find that, the sooner you’ll be able to banish your feelings of guilt. Remember, you react in a way that makes sense for you, not anyone else. And that’s okay.

5. What else is there?

Normally, it’s not just guilt – there are other emotions lurking underneath the surface. Is it anger? Loneliness? Is it a sense of being unfulfilled and unhappy with your life? The sooner you figure these out, the sooner you’ll have healthy coping methods of dealing with them. Guilt is often caused by an inner conflict more powerful than simply feeling like you owe someone something. First, try and find out what causes it. Then, think positively towards resolving it rather than wallowing in the guilty feelings.

6. Learn forgiveness.

We all do things that we wish we could take back and pretend they never happened. To err is human. Guilt is often caused by those mistakes we make along the way. The ones we feel can never be fixed. The sooner you realize that isn’t true, the sooner you’ll know that guilt only stops you from searching for a healthy solution to the problem. In the same way that you’d forgive your friends, learn to forgive yourself. Remind yourself that you can’t change the past. What’s done is done, and from now on you just need to move on and get on with your life. Take time to remind yourself of all the good things you can do with this situation from now on.

Final thoughts

Feeling guilty can be a debilitating and frightening emotion to deal with. Remember that there are healthy and unhealthy ways of coping with it. Try to focus on severing any unhealthy emotional attachments as soon as you can. The more you stay invested with guilt, the more you’ll feel yourself giving in to negative thoughts, which can lead to depression. Clear your mind and open your heart to new experiences. That way, you’ll find out life is something to be enjoyed and not something you should feel bad about.

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References:
https://www.bakadesuyo.com/2015/11/how-to-stop-feeling-guilty/
https://www.rd.com/advice/relationships/stop-feeling-guilty/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/the-mindful-self-express/201703/8-empowering-ways-stop-feeling-guilty

8 Signs of Loneliness and Depression You Should Never Ignore

June 10, 2018 by Power of Positivity

Let’s face it – we all have bad days. The car won’t start. You step in a mud puddle on the way into work. You open up a carton of spoiled yogurt when you sit down to lunch. These are normal inconveniences that most people can easily shake off, but for someone suffering from loneliness and depression, these events can send you into a downward spiral that is difficult to recover from.

Mental and emotional disorders are plaguing people in our society today. With all of the treatment resources available to us, it is essential we learn to recognize signs of loneliness and depression so that our friends and family can be given back their quality of life.

Loneliness and depression affect one in ten Americans. Depression is categorized as a “persistent feeling of sadness and lethargy that persist for more than two weeks.” If left untreated, loneliness and depression can affect day-to-day function, relationships, and even our physical health. Learning to recognize the symptoms of these disorders will ensure that we can provide proper treatment to overcome loneliness and depression.

8 Signs of Loneliness and Depression

Symptoms of loneliness and depression might be hard to recognize at first, especially if you or someone you live with is suffering. Once you learn what to look for, however, you can consider positive options for treatment.

1. Anger and Irritability

When people report symptoms of depression, these symptoms are often coupled with feelings of resentment, anger, irritability, and even periods of violence. If these feelings go unattended, patterns of passive-aggressive behavior develop, and it becomes difficult to manage. It is helpful to discuss feelings of anger and aggression with a counselor who is trained to help you find healthy ways to express these emotions without damaging your relationships.

2. Self-Criticism

Although we all have an inner critic that is fairly easy to silence for most of us, people that suffer from loneliness and depression find it incredibly hard to silence this negative inner influence. This pattern of “stinking thinking” becomes a downward spiral that just exacerbates other self-destructive behaviors. Pay attention to your own self-talk, and notice if you lean toward the positive or negative. Learn to combat negative, judgemental thoughts with positive self-talk, and your mood will improve.

3. Feelings of Hopelessness

People suffering from depression often report that one of the most debilitating emotions that they experience is feeling hopeless. In extreme cases, people can feel like their symptoms will never subside, causing some to seek to end their lives. Small steps can help you begin to climb out of the hole that these feelings cause. Importantly, experiencing little success in relationships and in life will, over time, reduce these feelings and provide emotional relief.

4. Loss of Interest in Relationships and Life in General

When people suffer from depression, they lose interest in things that they used to enjoy. Suddenly, things, like going to movies, enjoying time spent with family and friends, and even participating in recreational activities, becomes mundane and uninteresting. People who suffer from depression develop an aversion to keeping up their social lives, which can contribute to feelings of isolation and loneliness. This becomes a vicious cycle that perpetuates itself if help is not offered. Recognizing this symptom and then reaching out for help and support is key to breaking the cycle.

5. Changes in Weight and Appearance

Many people suffering from depression lose interest in food, which can contribute to significant weight loss. Others suffering from depression eat to excess in an attempt to make themselves feel better. Of course, this produces the undesirable effect of weight gain and poor health. Focusing on eating healthy, nutrition-rich foods that stimulate brain cell development will alleviate and reduce depressive symptoms.

6. Changes in Sleeping Habits

According to recent studies, nearly three-fourths of people suffering from depression also suffer from insomnia. Fear, anxiety, and the inability to “switch off” anxious thoughts contribute to feelings of frustration and hopelessness. These not only disturb sufferers during the day but also affect normal sleep and rest patterns. Many patients try to compensate by adopting irregular sleep patterns or consuming caffeine to excess, which does not allow the body to adopt their natural circadian rhythms. It is important to find things that help you relax at night. Also, realize that as you treat your symptoms, you will eventually feel better about your sleep cycle.

7. Fatigue

Because you may not be getting the restorative sleep that you need, you will most likely experience fatigue at some point during your day. Depressed bodies are in a constant state of stress. It can be exhausting to try to recover your energy and balance your system while under mental and emotional duress.

8. Unexplained Aches And Pains

A common complaint of people suffering from depression is that they experience generalized aches and pains. Neurotransmitters such as serotonin and norepinephrine not only influence mood but many biochemical processes in the body as well. When these natural chemicals are blocked in your brain, it can result in a heightened experience of pain. With a tendency to indulge in negative thinking, pain can be perceived as more severe than it actually is.

Final Thoughts: Acknowledge Your Struggle, There Is Help Available

In order to overcome loneliness and depression, you must first acknowledge that there is a problem. Importantly, embrace your opportunities for assistance. Then, surround yourself with loving and caring people who want to support you as you learn to restore your mental, emotional, and physical health.

A combination of cognitive behavior therapy and medication, combined with lifestyle changes, can be effective in treating and even eradicating symptoms of depression. So if you suspect that you or a loved one is suffering from these conditions, reach out. A better quality of life depends on you making the choice to receive help, and help is readily available. You deserve it!

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5 Behaviors That Reveal Someone Has Emotional Intelligence

June 9, 2018 by Power of Positivity

In our humble opinion, we need more emotional intelligence in this world. Emotional intelligence simply means possessing the ability to perceive, control, and assess the emotions of yourself and others. Though you cannot control other people’s emotions, you can control your own, which helps you control how you react to other people’s emotions.

“If your emotional abilities aren’t in hand, if you don’t have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can’t have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far.” – Daniel Goleman

People who have a high EQ (emotional intelligence) have a superpower that they probably don’t give themselves enough credit for. Our society seems to place great emphasis on IQ but gives very little attention to EQ, which might actually have more importance in our society.

Referencing the quote above by Daniel Goleman, a psychologist and one of the pioneers of emotional intelligence, being smart doesn’t mean much if you don’t have the empathy to go along with it. In Dr. Goleman’s book, Emotional Intelligence – Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, he outlined five main elements that make up emotional intelligence.

Now that we’ve discussed the importance of EQ in society let’s discuss those five behaviors that Dr. Goleman wrote about.

Here are 5 behaviors that reveal someone has emotional intelligence:

1. They are self-aware

According to the book, self-awareness is the first element of someone with a high EQ. People with high emotional intelligence have a sense of mindfulness about their emotions, which allows them to understand how these feelings affect themselves and others.

They don’t ever ignore their feelings, but they don’t allow those feelings to control them, either. Emotionally smart people simply pay attention to their feelings and keep them in check. They also are brutally honest with themselves because they know their own strengths and weaknesses. People with a high EQ use this knowledge and awareness to improve themselves and stay in tune with how they feel at all times.

2. They know how to control their emotions

People who are emotionally smart don’t let their emotions control them; they show those emotions who are boss. The emotionally intelligent know that feelings come and go, so they don’t get attached to any one emotion. They allow themselves to feel the emotions, yet don’t label them as “good” or “bad.”

Emotionally smart people know that humans display a variety of emotions, and they understand that this is perfectly healthy. At the same time, those with a superior EQ know how to regulate their emotions so that they don’t say something they don’t mean or make a careless decision in the heat of the moment.

3. They are motivated

People with a high EQ don’t play the victim card; they take full responsibility for their lives and feelings in any situation. Because they don’t allow their feelings to get in the way, they have greater productivity and drive than people with a lower EQ.

They might have a bad day, but they don’t allow it to become a bad week. Those with emotional intelligence take the lessons they learned on any given day and use it as fuel to keep moving toward their goals.

4. They have empathy for others

Perhaps the most important aspect of emotional intelligence is its empathy toward people. Empathy means recognizing how someone else feels and having compassion for them. Those with a high EQ never disregard the feelings of others; in fact, they really do care about others’ emotions. They have a deep desire to help people and many people sense this concern and choose to approach them for advice and support.

Emotionally smart people can read people like a book, and they often know how someone feels before they even speak. At the same time, they choose to listen and let the other person feel important and valuable. They spend a lot of time observing others and, therefore, can anticipate their needs.

5. They have great social skills

People who are emotionally smart enjoy communicating with people. Because of their self-awareness and empathy, they can make conversations run smoothly and easily get to the heart of what’s being discussed.

Those with a high EQ normally like to work with others, which means they help build people up instead of bringing them down. The emotionally intelligent make excellent leaders due to their ability to manage conflict and extend compassion to the people in their lives.

Sources:
https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newCDV_59.htm
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-brain-and-emotional-intelligence/201310/how-focus-changed-my-thinking-about-emotional-intel

10 Happiness Quotes That Will Make You Smile Again

June 9, 2018 by Power of Positivity

If you live in America, you’re probably working toward living a happy life. The movement toward finding happiness has grown so prevalent. We have dozens of Twitter accounts that dispense quotes about happiness. You can find T-shirts and home decor with happiness quotes. We even celebrate an International Day of Happiness. Happiness quotes remind us how we can cultivate peace and pleasant feelings in our lives.

Seeking happiness, however, takes more than reading quotes about happiness. It’s a journey, not a destination. According to a recent World Happiness Report, researchers conducted studies in which they ranked countries on their levels of happiness. These levels directly correlated to the country’s GDP, life expectancy, freedom, and corruption. Since happiness grows through our relationships, through giving and receiving kindness, and helping each other, cultivating happiness is within our reach.

Some of these quotes on happiness are backed by research. Current studies on self-compassion suggest that when we are kind to ourselves, we become happier, more resilient, and improve our mental health. In other words, when we feel compassion toward ourselves, we are more likely to express compassion for others. You may have heard the happiness quote, “Happiness is an inside job.”

In other words, we have the power to create our own happiness, but it takes work. We can increase our happiness and well-being through daily adjustments to our attitudes and habits (such as reading and retaining happiness quotes.)

Ten Happiness Quotes to Boost Your Mood

“The only thing that will make you happy is being happy with who you are, and not who people think you are.” Goldie Hawn
“The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don’t have.” Woody Allen
“The art of being happy lies in the power of extracting happiness from common things.” Henry Ward Beecher
“Happiness is not something you postpone for the future; it is something you design for the present.” Jim Rohn
“There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved.” George Sand
“Happiness is a choice. You can choose to be happy. There’s going to be stress in life, but it’s your choice whether you let it affect you or not.” Valerie Bertinelli
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” Mahatma Gandhi
“The key to being happy is knowing you have the power to choose what to accept and what to let go.” Dodinsky
“You deserve to be happy. You deserve to live a life you are excited about. Don’t let others make you forget that.” Lifehack
“A mind always employed is always happy. This is the true secret, the grand recipe, for felicity.” Thomas Jefferson

Happiness is an inside job

Although we all want to be happy, happiness is elusive for most people. People tend to believe that happiness comes from external factors, including material possessions, a high-paying promotion, or an exciting new romantic relationship. However, we hear repeatedly, especially from quotes about happiness, that it comes from within, and from focusing on the “little things” that exist in our lives. It’s one of the reasons people are encouraged to read and remember quotes on happiness, and perhaps to keep a gratitude journal. When you transcribe on paper all the things—food on the table, beloved family members, the morning sun—in your life you are grateful for, it boosts your mood. Recognizing and enjoying the little things can help lead to a happier life.

Another way to cultivate happiness is to focus on the present. One quote about happiness suggests that focusing on the past causes depression, focusing on the future causes anxiety, and focusing on the present causes peace. When you focus on what’s in front of you—a satisfying meal, a baby’s giggle, a dog inviting you to rub her belly—you are forced to slow down and enjoy simple pleasures. This takes time and focus (and sometimes work) but the priceless reward may be your own happiness. And don’t forget to read your happiness quotes!

8 Ways to Find Your Soul mate Using The Law of Attraction

June 9, 2018 by Power of Positivity

The Law of Attraction is a powerful force. You can harness this power to attract what you want! Your soul mate is out there. You may feel unhappy and lonely. Do not despair. There are many people out there who feel unwanted, unloved, and hopeless. Know that you’re worthy of love and wanted. Focus on what you want in a partner. It will bring you all the happiness love has to offer. It’s especially potent when you love yourself.

The Law of Attraction is a real force based on research, experience, belief, energy, and love. Its basis is that your life is the manifestation of your thoughts. It flows where you invest your energy. Knowing more will help you learn how to find your soul mate using the Law of Attraction.

Experts Behind the Law of Attraction

Credible professionals across the globe believe that using the Law of Attraction will help you find your soul mate. The science behind it involves quantum physics, the Double Slit Theory, and the Observer Effect. Albert Einstein was one of the first scientists to discover that everything is made of vibrating energy.

Bob Proctor is an expert in the field. He’s Founder of the Proctor Gallagher Institute. He teaches the theories behind the Law of Attraction. The Double Slit Theory studied the influence we have on electrons. It was practiced by scientist Thomas Young in 1801. This led to the discovery of the Observer Effect. It proved that electrons behave differently while being observed. The evidence presented scientists with the reality that our thoughts directly influence the world around us.

How to Attract Your Soul Mate in 8 Steps

Holistic health expert Mica Akullian M.S. is a counselor from San Francisco. He teaches that humans create their own experiences. That’s the principle of the Law of Attraction. It can be applied to all aspects of life and love. Follow these steps to watch your love life transform.

“We are the creators of our lives.” – Mica Akullian

1. Love Yourself

Loving yourself is the first step to attract your soul mate. It can be difficult to do so when you feel down. Try to think of one thing you love about yourself each day. It may seem like an obligation at first. However, it will make a difference in your life. People are naturally attracted to confidence. It will also allow you to give perfect love to another.

2. Focus on Finding Your Soul Mate

Take time to think about the type of person you want to spend your life with. Picture everything about them. Focus on how they look, talk, smell, and think about their personality. Imagine meeting this person. Experience it fully. Imagine it like you’re there. Your mind won’t know the difference.

3. Be Grateful

It can be difficult to feel grateful when you feel like nothing goes your way. It’s alright. However, an attitude filled with gratitude vibrates on high levels. Write something you’re grateful for each day. Put it in a jar. At the end of the week, you can open it and realize everything you have to be thankful for. Practice this to attract more positive things into your world.

4. Believe It Will Happen

It isn’t your job to worry about how your soul mate will enter your life. The Law of Attraction makes it happen. Don’t focus on the obstacles in your way. You may miss important soul mate signs. The universe is a magical place. Follow its lead. It will deliver.

5. Prepare Yourself

The universe will do its work. Believe that it already has. Focus on how you’ll act when you’re in a relationship. What do you want your house to look like? What will you act like? How will you present yourself? How will you feel? Answer these questions to make your answers a reality. It’s important to become who you want to be to create space in your life for someone else.

6. Meditate

Meditation is proven to reduce stress. Stress is caused by worry. Worry will lower your vibrations and energy. Start this practice by taking ten minutes each day to find a quiet and comfortable space. Sit with your eyes closed. Focus on your breathing. Try to relax. There are several guided meditations online that are based on the Law of Attraction.

7. Control Your Thoughts

Your thoughts are a result of your beliefs. Meditation will help you be mindful of
them. The energy they create is released into the universe. It will give you vital soul mate signs. It’s your job to follow them. The Law of Attraction will lead you in the right direction when your thoughts flow in a positive way.

8. Follow Your Heart

You will start to see signs of change in your life. Apply the Law of Attraction to learn how to find your soul mate. It’s essential to follow these soul mate signs to discover your true love.

” Know without a shadow of a doubt, that what you want most is coming straight your way.” – Katherine Hurst

Final Thoughts

Experts have proven the truth about the Law of Attraction through their research. These experiments prove we are all energy. It creates our reality. People around the world find love by using this universal law. Remember that love will happen for you.

Apply the Law of Attraction to your thoughts and actions. Know that you’re loved. You will find the perfect person. In the meantime, find reasons to be grateful. Remember to focus on what you want. Have faith that the universe will do its work. Love is on its way.

REFERENCES:
HTTP://EXTRAODDINARY.COM/VIBRATION-FREQUENCY-DESIRE/
HTTP://HOLISTICHEALTH-COUNSELING.COM/YOU-ARE-THE-CREATOR

10 Easy Ways to Control Your Blood Sugar Naturally

June 9, 2018 by Power of Positivity

If you have diabetes – and about half of all US adults are either pre-diabetic or have full-blown diabetes – then it’s all about those little numbers that show up on on your meter when you prick your finger for the morning blood test. If you haven’t had the pleasure yet, medicine (especially insulin) and supplies can cost a small fortune each month. Wouldn’t it be nice if you knew how to control blood sugar naturally and inexpensively?

Umm, actually you can but you might not like the method. Since type-2 diabetes is often a result of poor lifestyle choices – diet and lack of exercise mainly – that means you should be able to right the ship if you start making good choices.

10 Easy Tips on How to Control Blood Sugar Naturally

1. Move Your Body

The basic problem with diabetes is insulin insensitivity. Guess what makes you more insulin sensitive? Exercise!. You don’t have to be a world class athlete, but you do need to try weight-lifting, walking, running, biking, or even squirrel-wrangling – basically anything that gets your heart rate up and works at least a few muscles.

2. Control those Carbs

Without getting too scientific, it’s a good thing to know that the carbohydrates you consume are broken down by the body into sugar. If you eat a diet high in carbs, there’s a chance your sugar could spike or stay consistently elevated, which is a bad thing. One way to control blood sugar naturally is not to eat too many at one sitting. Better yet, try a low carb diet.

3. Fiber Up!

Fiber is like a paper towel in your digestive system. It slows carb digestion and absorbs sugar, sponging up the mess by eating too much of the wrong thing. Getting fiber in your diet helps level out sugar spikes and dips and is a good idea for either type-1 or type-2 diabetes. Keeping an approximate 2:1 fiber to sugar ratio is an underappreciated little gem of a method in how to control your blood sugar naturally.

4. Hydrate Yourself

Drinking good, old-fashioned water is another way to control blood sugar naturally. It goes to work doing this a few different ways. First, drinking plenty of water keeps the kidneys flushed so they don’t accumulate excess sugar. Second, it rehydrates the blood, a state of being that tends to moderate sugar levels. Our Western diet is often high on the caloric side. Taking it down a notch could be all you need to learn how to control blood sugar naturally.

RELATED: 10 Signs You’re Dehydrated

5. Learn the Glycemic Index

It’s hard to know how to control blood sugar naturally without understanding the particular effect an individual food has through the Glycemic Index classification system. If you are diabetic, you owe it to your health to at least be familiar with the idea that certain foods have a more severe impact on your sugar level than others.

6. Do You Have Stressyitis?

Sure, it’s a word. Check out the short-lived animated television series Stressed Eric. He’ll tell you. The important thing to remember is that stress can send your sugar numbers through the roof via the mechanism of releasing the hormones cortisol and glucagon. Don’t be Eric Feeble with that big, old vein pulsating on your forehead. Learn to chill.

7. Regular Checks

Do you tend to go days or even weeks without checking your sugar level? If your number management is so spot on that they never fluctuate, that’s fine, but if you’re avoiding the reality of an out-of-control food binge, that’s not fine. A phrase to keep in mind is “what gets measured, gets managed.” Furthermore, ignorance is only bliss until you start suffering severe side effects from high sugar levels.

8. Avoid Huge Meals

If you just remember one food related item from this list, let it be to avoid binge-out eating habits. When you have diabetes, starving yourself all day in order to squeeze every last drop of calories from a single meal is a bad idea and not at all how to control your blood sugar naturally. This sends your sugar into an over-the-moon spike, which is the opposite of the flat-line level we’re looking for.

9. The Magic of Beans

Like beans or hate them, the unavoidable reality is that they have a positive effect on blood sugars. The reason is because they digest slowly, so not only fill you up but also releases only a small amount of sugar into your bloodstream at a time.

10. Get Better Sleep

Lack of quality sleep is associated with higher incidence of type-2 diabetes. You need at least seven hours of uninterrupted slumber. Lack of sleep results in higher levels of fatty acids in the blood, which creates an environment more resistant to regulating your sugar levels.

Final Thoughts

The main point here is that learning how to control blood sugar naturally might eventually alleviate the need for medications. While you should only make adjustments to prescription dosages after consulting with your doctor, no medical professional in his or her right mind should be against any of the items just discussed. Work your way down the list, one item a time and, before you know it, you’ve got a whole new healthy lifestyle that might include a set of flashy new and smaller sugar numbers.