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Scientists Explain What Happens to Your Body When You Don’t Let Go of Negative Feelings

March 27, 2018 by Power of Positivity

Remember, you don’t forgive someone for his or her sake – you forgive them for your sake. ~ Stephanie A. Sarkis, Ph.D.

A Lesson from Friedrich Nietzsche

The German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche once likened forgiveness to weakness. Insisting that “God is dead” and that we are all sheep-slaves, it’s quite clear that Friedrich was a ‘tad’ more cynical than is considered healthy (a typical demeanor of philosopher-scholars.)

Had the great German philosopher understood the effects of stress on the body and mind, the end of his life may have come under slightly more favorable conditions. Nietzsche’s relentless pessimism, obsessive pursuit of “truth and inquiry,” and tireless work habits almost certainly contributed to his most unfortunate demise.

Mr. Nietzsche eventually suffered a complete mental breakdown and loss of all cognitive faculties at the age of 44. He then spent the rest of his life in a near-catatonic state in the care of his mother before dying of syphilis.

Like many others, past, present, and future, Friedrich Nietzsche was chronically stressed out. His inner and outer lives were turbulent, and he was always fighting his own demons, not to mention the expectations of his uber-religious and demanding mother.

Why Holding Onto Negative Feelings Is Really Bad

Why do we hold onto feelings like anger, anxiety, callousness, frustration, irritability, malice, rage, and resentment? Usually, something unfortunate occurs, and we delay forgiving ourselves or someone else – sometimes for life. While allowing a bit of bitterness to brew under the surface may not seem all that bad, it’s toxic to our physical and mental health.

To illustrate this point, let’s consider the effects of stressful events in early childhood – a time in one’s life that is supposed to be carefree and joyful. In an article titled “Early Childhood Stress Can Have a Lingering Effect on Your Health,” Dr. Joseph Mercola writes:

A study revealed impaired immune function in adolescents who experienced either physical abuse or time in an orphanage as youngsters. Even though their environments had changed, physiologically, they were still responding to stress. How the immune system develops is very much influenced by the environment.

The notable words within the above passage are: ‘physiologically; they were still responding to stress.’ As in, there is no longer a threat, but the body is still reacting as if there is. Both medical experts and laymen refer to this as being “wired for stress,” and this wiring kills people.

Dr. Mercola is referring to trauma – the end-result of prolonged exposure to stress. Mercola goes on to explain that childhood trauma causes lasting physical changes in the developing brain.

To be clear, environmental stimuli are (typically) more impactful for a child than an adult. However, this is not always the case, as combat veterans and other adult victims of trauma diagnosed with PTSD show.

In short: although the nervous system and immune system development slow as we age, changes do occur throughout life. Holding onto feelings that bother us – which our body perceives as nothing more than chronic stress – can lead to mild to severe physical and mental health conditions.

The Effects of Chronic Resentment

Chronic resentment, which is another way of saying chronic stress, can kill you. Consider that over 90 percent of all doctor visits are for stress-related health complaints.

Per the American Psychological Association (APA), “Chronic stress, or a constant stress experienced over a prolonged period of time, can contribute to long-term problems for the heart and blood vessels. The consistent and ongoing increase in heart rate, and the elevated stress hormones, (and elevated blood pressure)can take a toll on the body.”

WebMD lists the symptoms of long-term stress as follows:

– aches, pains, and tense muscles
– anxiety and depression
– chest pain and rapid heartbeat
– frequent colds and infections
– headaches
– insomnia
– loss of sexual desire and/or ability
– low energy
– upset stomach (constipation, diarrhea, and nausea)

Neurologically, long-term resentment can lead to a decrease in the production of new brain cells. Emotionally, the individual will likely become more emotional and forgetful.

While we may tend to ignore the physical signs of resentment, according to the late neuropharmacologist Candace Pert, “the body is your subconscious mind. Our physical body can be changed by the feelings we experience.”

Learning to Forgive

Self-forgiveness is essential for self-healing. ~ Unknown

If you are harboring feelings of anger and resentment, it is crucial to understand that your subconscious mind is in a state of continuous (perhaps low-level) stress. This “background stress” can take its toll on your body and mind.

With that said, it’s enormously beneficial to practice forgiveness. Remember, forgiveness implies that you’re making peace with the pain and trying to let it go – it is something that you do for yourself.

To begin the process of forgiveness, first find a peaceful place that allows you to be alone with your thoughts. Then, try the following four steps:

1. Recall the incident. The first step is about acceptance; accepting that it happened; accepting how you felt and still feel about it, and how you reacted.

2. Acknowledge lessons learned. The second step involves bringing to mind how the event affects you. It’s likely that you’ve experienced a bit of growth or learned some valuable lesson about yourself and others.

3. Decide to forgive. Think about the other person involved. While it may be hard, remembering that all of us are flawed and have weaknesses may help alleviate some of the negative emotions you’re experiencing.

Finally, say “I forgive you,” either to the other person or yourself. You may feel that explaining why you forgive them – and that’s completely okay, even healthy!

We part ways with one final quote, courtesy of Louis B. Smedes:

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”

https://youtu.be/FWMSYeRHWU4

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

Sources:
https://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2009/02/21/early-childhood-stress-can-have-a-lingering-eff
https://bebrainfit.com/effects-chronic-stress-brain/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mindful-anger/201409/how-do-you-forgive-even-when-it-feels-impossible-part-1
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201102/30-quotes-forgiveness
https://www.webmd.com/balance/stress-management/stress-symptoms-effects_of-stress-on-the-body
https://www.webmd.com/depression/news/20000225/holding-a-grudge-can-be-bad-for-your-health#1

5 Early Warning Signs of Tonsil Stones (And How to Prevent Them)

March 27, 2018 by Power of Positivity

Until you have one, you might not even know what tonsil stones are.

So… what are they?

Tonsil stones are hardened yellow or white bumps that appear on or within the tonsils. Small as a grain of rice, many people who acquire tonsil stones remain unaware of their presence.

After some time, the stones – which consist of food debris, dead cells, mucus, and saliva – can cause health complications. Bacteria and fungi also feed on tonsil stones, creating a distinct, unpleasant odor.

Why do tonsil stones appear? We’re all born with two tonsils, which reside in a kidney-bean-shaped crevice on both sides of the tongue near the pharynx. This area that constitutes our tonsils is full of nooks and crannies, allowing debris to settle. Over time, the debris may harden (or calcify) into stones.

What Are the Tonsil Stones?

The ‘tonsillolith’ produces five main (sometimes early) symptoms, provided the tonsil stone is large enough. Here are the symptoms you should know:

Learn seven causes of salivary stones aka mouth stones…and how to prevent them.

1. Bad breath

Also known as halitosis, progressively lousy breath often accompanies a tonsil stone. In one study of patients, researchers discovered that 75 percent of tonsil stones contain unstable sulfur compounds. Sulfur produces a notoriously bad smell, which is thought to be the catalyst for the terrible breath that accompanies the stones. This sulfur is produced by the anaerobic bacteria that feed on the stone’s debris.

2. Whitish or Yellowish Debris

While some tonsil stones are visible in the back of the throat, some are hidden. Stones that are just visible are often surrounded by a solid, plaque-like white substance (similar to the substance that appears on the tongue.) Additionally, the stone may appear as tiny rocks that stay trapped in your mouth.

3. Secondary oral health conditions

People who do not regularly brush or floss their teeth are more vulnerable to tonsil stones. Poor oral health may also contribute to a second condition, namely gum disease, oral infections, or tooth decay. Furthermore, untreated tonsil stones may produce plaque-like patches at the back of the throat.

4. Trouble swallowing

Swollen tonsils and tonsil stones can make it more difficult to swallow. Whether or not this symptom arises depends on the size and location of it. Difficulty swallowing is symptomatic of numerous medical conditions, so an exam may be necessary to determine the root cause.

5. Ear pain

Tonsil stones can grow any place in or around the tonsil. Due to shared nerve pathways, they may cause a person to feel pain in the ear, even though the stone itself is not touching the ear.

How to Get Rid of Tonsil Stones

There are several effective methods available for removing tonsil stones. While the success of these techniques may vary depending on individual cases, they can be beneficial in dislodging these troublesome formations. Let’s delve into some additional approaches:

Nasal irrigation: They can sometimes be dislodged by performing nasal irrigation. This involves using a saline solution to flush out the nasal passages, which can help remove any trapped debris, including tonsil stones. This method targets the nasal cavity and can reach the tonsils, providing a thorough cleanse.
Oral irrigators: Oral irrigators, such as water flossers, are commonly used for dental hygiene. But they can also be employed to tackle tonsil stones. By directing a stream of water at the back of the throat, these devices can dislodge and flush out the stones, effectively minimizing their presence.
Non-alcoholic mouthwash: Rinsing your mouth with a non-alcoholic mouthwash can help alleviate the discomfort associated with this condition and contribute to their removal. The mouthwash’s antiseptic properties can assist in loosening the stones, making it easier to dislodge them.
Saltwater gargling with added pressure: While gargling with salt water can help alleviate throat discomfort caused by this condition, applying additional pressure during gargling can enhance the dislodging process. Vigorously swishing the saltwater solution around your mouth and directing it toward the back of your throat increases the likelihood of dislodging the stones.
Professional removal: In cases where self-removal methods prove ineffective or if you experience severe complications, seeking professional assistance is advisable. An otolaryngologist, or ENT specialist, can evaluate your condition and perform procedures such as laser treatment or surgical removal of the tonsils (tonsillectomy). Tonsil stones are most common in those who acquire chronic tonsillitis. The surgical removal of the tonsils (a tonsillectomy) eliminates the possibility of stones developing for this demographic. However, various research studies showing the high complication rate of the procedure (around 20 percent) and the severe conditions (e.g., deep infection of the tonsil or tonsil abscess) are giving some a second pause.

How to Prevent Tonsil Stones

Preventing tonsil stones is crucial for those who want to avoid the discomfort and inconvenience they can bring. In addition to the aforementioned techniques, there are a few more preventive measures you can incorporate into your daily routine:

Practice good oral hygiene: Alongside regular brushing and flossing, paying attention to the back of your tongue can significantly reduce the formation of tonsil stones. Bacteria will often accumulate on the tongue’s surface, providing a breeding ground for the debris contributing to these stones’ formation. Use a tongue scraper or your toothbrush to gently clean the back of your tongue during your oral hygiene routine.
Quit smoking: Smoking damages overall health and increases the risk of developing this condition. The chemicals and toxins in cigarettes can irritate and inflame the tonsils, promoting the accumulation of debris and the formation of stones. By quitting smoking, you can significantly reduce the likelihood of developing tonsil stones and improve your overall well-being.
Stay hydrated: Drinking adequate water throughout the day is essential for maintaining optimal oral health. Proper hydration helps prevent the buildup of bacteria and debris in the mouth, reducing the chances of this formation. Aim to drink at least eight glasses of water daily, and consider using a humidifier in dry environments to prevent excessive drying of the throat and mouth.

Final Thoughts on Understanding How to Deal With Tonsil Stones

In conclusion, dealing with this condition can be uncomfortable and frustrating. However, you can effectively manage and prevent their formation with the right knowledge and techniques. From gentle home remedies to seeking professional assistance when necessary, various options are available to help you remove tonsil stones and alleviate any associated symptoms.

Remember to exercise caution when dislodging tonsil stones, as improper techniques may lead to complications. If self-removal methods prove ineffective or if you experience persistent issues, it’s always wise to consult a healthcare professional for proper evaluation and guidance.

By practicing good oral hygiene, staying hydrated, and making healthy lifestyle choices such as quitting smoking, you can reduce the likelihood of stone formation and maintain better oral health. Stay proactive in your oral care routine, and don’t hesitate to seek help. With these preventive measures and the right approach, you can effectively manage tonsil stones and enjoy a healthier, more comfortable life.

9 Adult Behaviors of Someone That Had Emotionally Unavailable Parents As A Child

March 27, 2018 by Power of Positivity

The children of parents who were emotionally unavailable eventually grow up into adults. In adulthood, those people may have difficulty pinpointing exactly what went wrong in their childhood. It’s only through observation of behaviors that therapists and psychologists can reveal what happens to children who emotionally unavailable parents. Here are some of the most common adult behaviors of someone with emotionally unavailable parents.

“People THRIVE on positive reinforcement. They wither with criticism.” – Patti Henry

Here Are 9 Behaviors Of Someone Who Had Emotionally Unavailable Parents

1. Difficulty with attachments

Adults who had emotionally unavailable parents may have difficulty with commitment and attachments in their lives. “Unstable people first have to get themselves stable before they can truly commit to a relationship—and that could take a long time,” says licensed marriage and family therapist Neil Rosenthal.

Adults raised by emotionally unavailable parents are unstable and, hence, struggle with relationships. They tend to have a fear of both attachment and love. Adults with attachment issues may not notice that they sabotage their relationships or become distant when attachment seems probable.

2. Children of emotionally unavailable parents may have identity issues

Children learn a lot about their identity through their parents. Emotionally unavailable parents tend to have less of an impact on their children, which means that the children don’t grasp their identities as well. When growing into adulthood, these people tend to have identity issues and tend to have a loss of direction in life. They don’t know where to go or what to do in life.

3. Difficulty accepting change

Adults who were raised by emotionally distant parents tend to have issues with change. They’re not very adaptable and often prefer that things stay the same. This is because their parents never taught them to handle their emotions appropriately. Change can be difficult for children. When they don’t have good guidance on how to deal with it, these children tend to grow up into adults who still can’t handle change.

4. Children of emotionally unavailable parents may have low self-esteem

For much of their life, children rely on their parents to meet their emotional needs. When those emotional needs aren’t getting met, children develop low self-esteem. This low self-esteem doesn’t end when the children grow into adulthood, either.

“Often the roots of low self- esteem lie deep in a wounded child within us who feels “not good enough.” As children we feel accepted only to the extent we feel unconditionally loved and supported by our parents,” says Dr. Sonera Jhaveri.

Thus, adults with emotionally absent parents often think poorly of themselves and characterize themselves as “not good enough”.

5. Doesn’t understand emotions

When children are raised with emotionally unavailable parents, they never learn how to communicate their emotions. This leads to children carrying this misunderstanding of emotions into adulthood. One of the most common behaviors of an adult with emotionally unavailable parents is a lack of understanding about their emotions. They may be unable to identify their feelings, even if you ask.

6. Sensitivity to rejection

Adults with emotionally unavailable parents may be extremely sensitive to rejection or even perceived rejection. For example, an adult with emotionally unavailable parents may become distressed at the idea that someone at their workplace that they admire didn’t like their presentation. This is commonly known as “rejection sensitive dysphoria” and can cause extreme distress at even the perception of rejection, such as a neutral response over an enthusiastic one.

7. Perfectionism

Perfectionism is highly likely for those carrying the weight of an emotionally unavailable parent into adulthood. Due to the sensitivity of rejection and the deep-seated drive for acceptance and affirmation, adults whose parents were emotionally unavailable need everything they do to be perfect. This can carry over into their workplace, relationships, and hobbies.

8. Trouble setting boundaries

Adults who had emotionally unavailable parents were never taught how to set healthy boundaries. This results in these adults now trying to replicate a parental relationship with other people in their lives. This often involves men or women seeking out romantic partners who can fill the role of a parental figure – which inevitably causes upset in the relationship.

9. Lying

Lying is often a behavior that we consider manipulative, but sometimes lying can result from emotionally absent parents. Most often, adults who have emotionally absent parents tend to lie because they’re trying to get a specific reaction out of the people that they’re lying to. While this is a manipulative tactic, these people are doing it to receive some affirmation, which they didn’t receive as children.

Final Thoughts on Growing Up With Emotionally Unavailable Parents

Knowing the adult behaviors of an emotionally absent parent is important for therapists and people trying to move on from their past. While the idea of an adult still suffering from absent parents is saddening, it isn’t the end of the road. Mental health experts have long been figuring out the best way to lead people onto the road of recovery when it comes to emotionally unavailable parents. It’s never too late for someone to get help and address maladaptive behaviors.

15 Traits That Reveal You Are A Spiritual Healer (And Don’t Know It)

March 25, 2018 by Power of Positivity

Now more than ever, we need healers to come forward with their gifts and raise the world’s vibration. Healers are a particular group that can help others come out of suffering and into the light. Many people don’t have any hope left due to the current state of affairs, but spiritual healers can lift the broken and wounded up and restore their faith in humanity. The worn-out, fear-based programming doesn’t work anymore for the majority of people, and so grand healing is now taking place on the planet.

You might know a healer in your life or feel like you’re one yourself, but sometimes, these gifts present themselves in subtle ways. Here are some signs to look out for in yourself and others that may point to being a spiritual healer.

Here are 15 traits that reveal you’re a spiritual healer (and don’t know it):

Spiritual healers are the ones who heal themselves first and create a ripple outward for others…

1. A spiritual healer will often identify as an empath.

This world is oh-so draining for empaths and highly sensitive people. The noise, busyness, fast pace, social interactions, greed, violence, and other adverse occurrences leave a spiritual healer utterly exhausted. Empaths and lightworkers absorb the energy of the world around them, which often leaves them feeling frazzled and overwhelmed. Their sensitivity is a blessing because it can help heal the planet, but healers often feel cursed by this trait due to how heavy it can make them feel emotional.

2. You crave alone time often.

Healers don’t dislike people; they thrive better on their own. As we said, the world’s energy can drain an empath or spiritual healer, so they need tons of time to recharge and rebalance their energies.

3. You feel that life is more than just paying bills.

Spiritual healers feel trapped in this system because it’s centered around making money, not following one’s purpose. Healers can get quite frustrated with the world because they want to help others, but they feel that making money can get in the way due to time and financial constraints.

If you feel trapped in your current job and dream of helping others, you might be a healer.

4. People are always coming to a spiritual healer for advice.

People come to your left and right to help them with their problems because they know you’ll have the answers. You might not know how to solve the problems in your own life, but you know how to drop everything and listen to someone else’s struggles. Because you’re highly sensitive, you can easily relate to other people’s troubles and help them escape the darkness.

5. You’re highly intuitive.

A spiritual healer runs on emotions, not logic. Your gut feelings are king in decision-making because they have yet to steer you wrong. You “know” when something doesn’t feel right, so you follow that instinct and don’t question it. If this sounds like you, you’re probably a spiritual healer.

6. You’ve had struggles with mental health.

Many spiritual healers suffer from mental disorders because they feel they don’t fit in. They don’t know where to turn because every path seems to lead to stress and confusion, which can cause anxiety and depression. Spiritual healers are more sensitive to the overwhelming stimuli on the planet, which can cause them to retreat into solitude and avoid the world entirely. Speaking of which…

7. Social situations drain your energy.

You feel exhausted afterward, even if it’s just going out to do errands. Dealing with traffic, big crowds, your job, and conversations with others can quickly zap your energy and leave you daydreaming about crawling into bed and staying there for a while.

8. You can sense other people’s emotions.

This is perhaps one of the most evident signs of being a healer. If you can read someone else just by the emotions on their face or their body language, you’re probably destined to be a spiritual healer.

9. You feel drawn to healing professions.

If you feel drawn to a career in energy work such as Reiki or work that benefits the planet, like environmental sustainability, you are probably a healer. Healers don’t do well in careers like sales or management because their talents don’t shine in these fields. They prefer jobs that genuinely have a purpose, not just those that are centered on increasing profits.

10. People feel calm or happy around you.

Despite your struggles, people can see past them and into your true nature. They say you make them feel centered, balanced, calm, or any other positive emotion. Healers can lift other people and give them hope, so if this sounds like you, you’re a truly special soul.

11. A spiritual healer may just feel “different.”

You can’t explain it to people, but you’ve felt like an outcast your whole life. You don’t understand the world’s ways because many of them cause suffering, which causes great pain. It almost feels like you have no emotional skin because many things about the world impact you deeply. You don’t relate to the shallowness of society, which is why you choose to remain an outcast, and you don’t see this as a bad thing.

12. You are an idealist.

Your head is always in the clouds because it sure beats being on the ground! You feel like the world could be so simple, but we make it incredibly complicated. Why can’t we share our resources instead of fighting over them and destroying them? Why do we build a world that disconnects us from the natural one we were born into?

13. You are a deep thinker.

Because you’re an idealist, you’re also a visionary that can see the bigger picture. You are always contemplating life on this planet to try to make sense of things and work them out in your mind.

14. You feel deeply connected to nature and animals.

Humans don’t make much sense to you, so you gravitate toward animals and nature to feel peace and serenity.

15. A spiritual healer is a superb listener.

You might not like talking much, but you know how to listen. You don’t just hear people but tune into what they’re saying and their subtle body language. You understand people well, which is why you attract those who need help.

Final Thoughts on Awakening to the Fact That You Are a Spiritual Healer

Perhaps you always knew you somehow felt as though you were not of this world or experienced any of the sensations described in this article. Now, this should make sense to you, and this newfound knowledge can help you share your gifts with the world.

Psychologist Explains: People Who Are ‘Original’ Thinkers Do These 5 Things…

March 25, 2018 by Power of Positivity

“… being original is not easy, but I have no doubt about this: it’s the best way to improve the world around us.” – Adam Grant

Original thinkers are people who are able to create things from seemingly nothing. They are the artists, inventors, writers, and entrepreneurs of the world. Some people may think that original thinkers are born that way. Well, sometimes that’s true. But there are also habits that original thinkers all exhibit. Psychologists have pinpointed the things that original thinkers do. These habits not only mark them as original thinkers, but also help them have those original, creative and out-of-this-world ideas in the first place.

Here Are 5 Things That Original Thinkers Do Differently

1. Original thinkers aren’t afraid to have bad ideas

Not everything that an original thinker comes up with is going to be golden. In fact, original thinkers have just as many bad ideas and rough starts as the rest of us. The difference between original thinkers and everyone else, is that original thinkers aren’t afraid to have bad ideas. The only way that you can make a bad idea into a great one, is to have the idea in the first place.

“Originals are also afraid of failing, but what sets them apart from the rest of us is that they’re even more afraid of failing to try,” says psychology professor Adam Grant.

Great ideas aren’t born; they’re made. Original thinkers know that everyone has to start somewhere. They’re not afraid to do poorly in order to learn how to be better.

2. Original thinkers procrastinate

Many people have been told that procrastination isn’t a good thing. This can be true sometimes. Other times, procrastination can be vital for a creative outlet. Many original thinkers have a hard time getting started. They may spend a lot of time thinking about their idea rather than planning it out. If your goal is productivity, procrastination can be a bit detrimental.

But, if the goal is creativity, then the time crunch can really give you a boost in the right direction. Original thinkers don’t always mean to procrastinate … but in the end, they end up waiting until the last minute to get that extra boost of adrenaline-fueled creativity.

3. Original thinkers embrace their weaknesses

Admitting and embracing your weaknesses may seem counterproductive to original thinking, but it’s actually a great tool. Original thinkers have a unique ability to admit their weaknesses and flaws, and then turn around and embrace them. Of course, this doesn’t mean that original thinkers just accept the things they’re not good at without trying.

Rather, this means that an original thinker is more likely to ask for help when they need it. If they know there is a skill that they’re not particularly good at, they find a way to make themselves good at it. People who are trapped by their limitations aren’t likely to become original thinkers.

Derek Sivers was quoted saying, “In a fixed mindset, you want to hide your flaws so you’re not judged or labeled a failure. In a growth mindset, your flaws are just a TO-DO list of things to improve.”

4. Original thinkers are able to overcome “groupthink”

“Groupthink” is a term that denotes the idea of going along with something just because a group of people think the exact same thing. In environments like school or work, this can be pretty hard to avoid. Giving into groupthink doesn’t mean you’re a weak person.

After all, our society is designed to get us to agree with the popular opinion. However, original thinkers take the time to step back and question the popular opinion. They’re far more likely to go against the flow of the group, which means they’ll be much more likely to have original thoughts and ideas.

5. Original thinkers have role models and influences

Contrary to popular belief, original thinkers don’t just come up with these grand ideas all on their own. Everything influences us, from conversations we overhear on the subway to the television show we watch before bedtime. No one is exempt from influence, especially original thinkers.

Michelle Obama said, “We know that our greatness comes from when we appreciate each other’s strengths, when we learn from each other, when we lean on each other…we’re all in this together. We always have been.”

The difference between original thinkers and everyone else, is that they take those influences and role models and make something completely new, original and exciting out of them. They use their influence to help propel their own creativity, rather than trying to rehash the same old idea. People who want to be original thinkers should never be afraid to find influence and inspiration in their role models.

Final thoughts

Original thinkers are some of the most creative people in the world. There’s always room to become an original thinker. There’s no reason that anyone should feel that they can’t practice these habits that turn ordinary thinkers into original ones. Everyone has an original thinker inside of them; they just need to know the habits that will bring it out.

https://youtu.be/YHAZ6q-WbnE

References:
https://ideapod.com/psychology-professor-reveals-4-surprising-habits-original-thinkers/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=link&utm_campaign=goalcast
https://medium.com/personal-growth/5-fascinating-ways-to-transform-your-weaknesses-into-strengths-ab78862cfeb7

Top 10 Lies People Tell Their Partner

March 24, 2018 by Power of Positivity

Unless you’re the human embodiment of perfection, you have probably told a lie. We all have. It’s human nature to fib a little or omit the truth in order to save yourself from an uncomfortable conversation, embarrassment, or backlash.

“In all of our relationships – whether romantic, friendly or in the workplace – trust is a very important issue and necessary for a healthy relationship dynamic. Until you are in a genuinely committed relationship with someone you know well, and know has your best interests at heart, the only person you can really rely on is yourself,” says psychologist and life coach Honey Langcaster-James

In a relationship, people tend to lie to one another more than you might think. Here are some of the most common lies that people tell their partners.

Here Are 10 Lies People Tell Their Partner (That they don’t even have to)

“A single lie destroys a whole reputation of integrity.” – Baltasar Gracian

1. “I’m fine.”

Have you ever heard this phrase? Maybe you’ve uttered it yourself once or twice. This little white lie is one of the most told lies in a relationship.

“The one thing couples should never lie about is how they feel… Whether you are replying to the actual question or showing that you’re fine or good based on your verbal or body language, you must be truthful and open with your partner about how you feel,” says relationship coach Chris Armstrong.

Maybe you didn’t want to get into how you were feeling, or maybe you just wanted to avoid an argument. Either way, most people tell this lie once or twice (or more!).

2. How many partners you’ve had

Most people tend to fib on the lower side of how many partners they’ve had. Even if the number isn’t particularly large, or the list particularly long, we always want our current partner to feel special. If you’ve fudged the number of people you’ve been with, don’t worry. Everyone else is doing it too.

3. You like their parents

Not everyone gets along with their in-laws, or future in-laws. People tend to lie about how much they actually like their partner’s parents. They either do this to keep the peace, or because they really don’t see the point in telling the truth about their feelings. After all, for some people, blood is definitely thicker than water.

4. How much money you spend

“Couples should never lie to each other about finances. There should be an open discussion, agreements and transparency between the two of them when it comes to finances,” says psychologist Nikki Martinez.

Have you ever gone out on a little “treat yo’ self!” shopping spree, and then had to hastily hide the receipt and make up a lie about how everything was on sale? How much money that gets spent is one of the most common lies couples tell one another.

“Debt and spending habits are dealbreakers,” says relationship expert April Masini.

5. “You look great.”

This little white lie is something we sometimes have to break out in order to not hurt our partner’s feelings. Whether you’re lying about the suit that looks totally hideous, or the dress that accentuates all the wrong features, lying about how your partner looks in something is probably the most common lie told in relationships.

6. You never think about your ex

We share our love and our lives with so many different people. Even if your last relationship ended mutually, or even if you were the one to call things off, your feelings don’t just disappear. It’s not a bad thing to think about your ex sometimes, and to remind yourself of the feelings you had. But, it might cause jealousy, so that’s why some people choose to fib about it to their current partners.

7. You like their cooking

If your partner isn’t particularly skilled in the kitchen, you’ve probably mastered the art of chewing with a straight face … or getting to the kitchen to start dinner first. Most people lie about the skill of cooking that their partners have. After all, if they never try, how are they going to get better? Sometimes, a little white lie is a good thing.

“Many of us don’t want to hear the awful truth every time. Say someone asks you how she looks. She probably wants to hear that she looks great. If she doesn’t look great, and we tell her the truth, we create a conflict and have to deal with the results,” adds a study on the University of Rochester Medical Center.

8. “I agree with you.”

Being in a relationship is about having each other’s backs. If your partner gets into an argument, or disagreement, with someone else, you’ve probably stood up for them. Even though people may not particularly agree with their partner in the argument, they’re probably going to lie and say they do. After all, solidarity in a relationship is important.

9. “You’re the best.”

When it comes to being physically intimate, people tend to lie to their partners about how good they are in bed. That isn’t to say that people don’t enjoy the things they do with their partners. They just tend to fib about HOW good, and whether or not they’re the best partner they’ve ever had. There’s no reason to make your partner self-conscious or jealous about relationships in the past. So, people tend to fib.

10. What you really look like

Unless you live together, and your partner sees you every day, you might be lying (just a little!) to your partner about what you really look like. Maybe you only send your best-looking selfies, or maybe you only see one another when you’re done up and looking your best. This is one of the most common little white lies that partners tell one another.

Final thoughts

Lying isn’t a good practice in a relationship. In fact, the best thing to do is to try and omit these lies without being hurtful with your honesty. But no one is perfect, and most of these are lies that help keep the peace and avoid hurting your partner’s feelings. If you find yourself telling these lies in your relationship, don’t worry. You’re not alone.

https://youtu.be/tHMUnm-vDNk

References:
http://www.swnsdigital.com/2017/03/i-was-listening-honest-the-top-20-lies-we-tell-our-partners/?dm_i=2KU4,1117O,6GPR0W,30L5R,1
https://www.bustle.com/articles/144284-the-one-thing-couples-should-never-lie-to-each-other-about
https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/content.aspx?contenttypeid=1&contentid=528

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What Are the Tonsil Stones?

1. Bad breath

2. Whitish or Yellowish Debris

3. Secondary oral health conditions

4. Trouble swallowing

5. Ear pain

How to Get Rid of Tonsil Stones

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Final Thoughts on Understanding How to Deal With Tonsil Stones

Here Are 9 Behaviors Of Someone Who Had Emotionally Unavailable Parents

1. Difficulty with attachments

2. Children of emotionally unavailable parents may have identity issues

3. Difficulty accepting change

4. Children of emotionally unavailable parents may have low self-esteem

5. Doesn’t understand emotions

6. Sensitivity to rejection

7. Perfectionism

8. Trouble setting boundaries

9. Lying

Final Thoughts on Growing Up With Emotionally Unavailable Parents

Here are 15 traits that reveal you’re a spiritual healer (and don’t know it):

1. A spiritual healer will often identify as an empath.

2. You crave alone time often.

3. You feel that life is more than just paying bills.

4. People are always coming to a spiritual healer for advice.

5. You’re highly intuitive.

6. You’ve had struggles with mental health.

7. Social situations drain your energy.

8. You can sense other people’s emotions.

9. You feel drawn to healing professions.

10. People feel calm or happy around you.

11. A spiritual healer may just feel “different.”

12. You are an idealist.

13. You are a deep thinker.

14. You feel deeply connected to nature and animals.

15. A spiritual healer is a superb listener.

Final Thoughts on Awakening to the Fact That You Are a Spiritual Healer

Here Are 5 Things That Original Thinkers Do Differently

1. Original thinkers aren’t afraid to have bad ideas

2. Original thinkers procrastinate

3. Original thinkers embrace their weaknesses

4. Original thinkers are able to overcome “groupthink”

5. Original thinkers have role models and influences

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

References: https://ideapod.com/psychology-professor-reveals-4-surprising-habits-original-thinkers/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=link&utm_campaign=goalcast https://medium.com/personal-growth/5-fascinating-ways-to-transform-your-weaknesses-into-strengths-ab78862cfeb7

Here Are 10 Lies People Tell Their Partner (That they don’t even have to)

1. “I’m fine.”

2. How many partners you’ve had

3. You like their parents

4. How much money you spend

5. “You look great.”

6. You never think about your ex

7. You like their cooking

8. “I agree with you.”

9. “You’re the best.”

10. What you really look like

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Rise and Shine On! Master Your Day with the Ultimate Positive Morning Guide + Checklist

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Every day is a day to shine. Shine on!

References:
https://ideapod.com/psychology-professor-reveals-4-surprising-habits-original-thinkers/?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=link&utm_campaign=goalcast
https://medium.com/personal-growth/5-fascinating-ways-to-transform-your-weaknesses-into-strengths-ab78862cfeb7

Rise and Shine On!
Master Your Day with the Ultimate Positive Morning Guide + Checklist