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What Causes People To Have Stress (And How to Avoid It)

Stress – it’s a serious problem out there.

Maybe there’s a serious problem in there, with you. Don’t fret, my friend. You’re in the company of billions of others.

We’re all perpetually stressed.

It’s easy, and justifiable, to place some blame on the external world (“modern society”) and the feverish pace we’re instructed to live our lives.

What makes it worse is that we’re told: “That’s life.” Got a job you hate? “That’s life.” Barely making ends meet? “That’s life.”

No. The phrase “That’s life” is paradoxical as it is pointless.

The truth that evades so many of us is this: external influences affect us as much as we allow and no more.

Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults in the United States age 18 and older, or 18.1% of the population every year. ~ The Anxiety and Depression Association Of America

A lesson from long ago…

Siddhartha Gautama, otherwise known as the Buddha, was a real, historical figure, born into a royal family in ancient India. He had everything: wealth, loving parents, the best clothing, servants, and so forth.

But he was deeply discontented.

For a long period, Siddhartha didn’t know exactly why he felt this way. His father, knowing the struggles of the masses, refused to let the young man outside of the palace walls.

The young Prince had enough of his father’s protectionism.

All it took was one jaunt outside of his palace to see the multitudes suffering from poverty, sickness, and despair.

Now young Siddhartha knew why he was disturbed; which led to another question (naturally): why is there so much suffering?

The Prince shed his royal garb, said his goodbyes, and went on a deeply personal search.

After a long period of searching for answers to no avail, Siddhartha refused to move from under a Bodhi tree until he received some sensible answers.

The story goes that Siddhartha sat there for days in meditation. When he awoke, the story goes, Siddhartha was no longer. He was enlightened and became the Buddha.

Buddhists use the term enlightenment to describe “an internal awakening.”

His words would penetrate the souls of people who listened and have categorically baffled the brightest skeptics to this day.

Case In Point

Robert Wright, a world-renowned professor and author of Why Buddhism Is True says:

“The reason we suffer and the reason why we make other people suffer is that we don’t see the world clearly…Buddhism’s diagnosis of the human predicament is deeply valid and urgently important.”

Wright goes on to explain that Buddha knew this well before his time.

Furthermore, Wright explains – like so many other scholars have – that Buddha’s insights into the human mind and meditation are astonishing to the point that they’re just now being recognized as “valid” by legions of brain scientists and their ilk.

What Causes People To Have Stress (And How to Avoid It)

From Buddha to the Brain

Perhaps following the Buddha’s claims, psychologists and neuroscientists continue to show – over and over again – that external “pleasures” can not make us happy for long.

In fact, the very things we “can’t live without” can be detrimental to our mental well-being if used to excess. Yes, this means our cell phones, computers, makeup, cigarettes, alcohol, and every type of luxury.

On a neuroscientific level, our brain’s have evolved considerably over the millennia. However, we are still stuck with the reptilian brain, the amygdala, which is responsible for the fight-or-flight response.

What’s considerably different is the trigger.

That is, we’re not on-edge about some carnivorous predator that may or may not be lurking in the bushes. Instead, we’re overstimulated by noise and busyness.

stress

We’re perpetually “rushed.” Our fight-or-flight response is also triggered by the very possessions so many of us cherish.

None of this is good for the mind, body, or soul.

What’s the solution?

The answer here is “simple”: you must rid yourself of modern society’s “triggers” at least some of the time.

Logically, there’s no reason to have our cell phones on and by our side 24/7. Rationally, watching 4 or more hours of television is unhealthy and intellectually worthless. Sensibly, consuming a diet of mostly processed foods is foolish and unwholesome.

Minimalism

There’s a reason why things like minimalism, meditation, organic foods, vegetarianism, mindfulness, aromatherapy, acupuncture, and prayer exist.

There’s a reason why people give up their “stuff” and seek a different path.

We needn’t be drastic in our actions. For example, this author found a wonderful white noise application that calms his mind. The phone stays out of his eye line. Organic food is consumed whenever possible. Meditation is practiced for a minimum of half an hour daily.

All of these things, which are ways of life for many, are the answer to why we experience so much stress. Bear in mind that not everyone will have the same “answer.”

We cannot possibly eradicate all stress.

We can – and should – reduce our exposure to it.

Put your phone away, get out into nature, take a mindfulness meditation course.

Breathe.

5 Reasons to Eat Spinach Every Day, According to Science

“You may have witnessed the short-term effects of food on your brain: a sugar rush after too much candy or mental fog from hunger. But what we eat also affects us in the long term. Starting in the womb and continuing into old age, our diets don’t just shape our bodies, but our brains as well.” ~ Society for Neuroscience

Western Diets & Nutrient Deficiency

The term “Western Diet” is synonymous with bad health – and for a good reason. Westerners have earned the notorious reputation for engorging on hot dogs, cheeseburgers, ice cream cake, and others – all of which have originated in Western countries.

Of the 20 most obese countries in the world, over half consume  “Western diets.” In short, this means more additives and preservatives, less fresh fruits and vegetables, and more processed foods.

When our body is deprived of nutrients, a state that occurs far too often in Western countries, our body responds by craving just about anything.

We’re more vulnerable to the dollar menus and fast food joints; the “quick fixes.”

While this may be good for McDonald’s bottom line, it’s not good for us.

The Answer: More Superfoods!

A superfood is defined as “a nutrient-rich food considered to be especially beneficial for health and well-being.”

Why do we need more of them? Here are a few key reasons:

– Fight off hunger pangs (and the “quick fixes.”)

– Maintain a healthy body weight.

– Feel good about ourselves.

– Stabilize our blood sugar.

And, of course, Feed The Brain!

Spinach: An Impressive Superfood

spinach

Megan Ware, a registered dietitian and private practitioner, writes in MedicalNewsToday:

“Popeye was definitely on to something. Spinach is a super food loaded with tons of nutrients in a low-calorie package. Dark, leafy greens like spinach are important for skin, hair, and bone health. They also provide protein, iron, vitamins, and minerals.”

Now that we’ve established the importance of spinach on our body’s overall health, let’s about five cerebral benefits to eating Popeye’s go-to veggie.

Do You Eat Spinach? Here are Five Reasons Why You Should

1. Spinach boosts memory

A diet that’s deficient in folate, one of the B-vitamins (B9), can cause all sorts of problems. Anxiety, confusion, depression, fatigue, and forgetfulness among them. B-vitamins are critical to brain function, especially for memory health.

The typical “Western” diet – filled with refined sugars and unhealthy fats – can be devastating to both short-term and long-term memory.

Spinach, meanwhile, is one of the most potent memory-boosters. One cup of spinach contains 65% of the recommended daily value (RDV) of folate and over 20% of your RDV for vitamin B6.

2. Spinach enhances focus 

The amino acid L-tyrosine is critical for synthesizing (combining) the neurochemicals dopamine and norepinephrine.

Dopamine is essential for drive and motivation; norepinephrine is the brain’s natural stress deterrent. Drive, motivation, and stress-resistance are crucial for concentration and focus.

One cup of spinach includes 20% RDV of tyrosine. Other tyrosine-rich foods include avocados, beans, meat, tuna, poultry, salmon, seed, and walnuts.

3. Spinach prevents inflammation harmful to brain function

High levels of inflammation increase the risk of many diseases. While we relate chronic inflammation to conditions of the body; it can adversely affect our brain function.

Folate reduces the inflammatory agent homocysteine, which, according to the American Journal of Psychiatry, impedes the activity of the brain’s neurotransmitters.

4. Spinach helps sharpen cognition

Per a study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, a group of older adults who ate a diet high in dietary fiber scored higher on cognitive tests than those who did not.

Dietary fiber helps ease digestion and is an essential nutrient for healthy gut function. Numerous studies have demonstrated the important relationship between gut health and brain function. In fact, the two are so intricately connected; scientists refer to the gut as the “Second Brain.”

One cup of boiled spinach contains around 17% of the RDV for fiber.

5. Spinach slows cognitive decline

One of the best things you can do for long-term brain health is eating right. We’ve established the fact that spinach contains some of the most valuable vitamins and minerals for promoting cognitive development.

As it turns out, the superfood helps fight against age-related cognitive decline. Scientists believe this is because of the vegetable’s rich amount of antioxidants.

Spinach, along with other antioxidant-rich foods, “(have) rather hopeful implications for prevention of neurological disorders in our increasingly aging population.”

Putting It All Together

We now know that the brain is “plastic” – it can grow new neural connections throughout life. Scientists call this phenomenon neuroplasticity.

Fantastic as neuroplasticity is, we can only take advantage of this ability by (1) eating right and (2) “exercising” our brain (keeping it active.)

Given that spinach (and other leafy greens) are capable of expanding our cognitive capabilities and fighting age-related mental decay, we should be doing everything we can to incorporate them into our diets!

Sources:
http://www.brainfacts.org/across-the-lifespan/diet-and-exercise/articles/2015/lets-eat-how-diet-influences-the-brain/

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-84286/How-spinach-boost-brain-power.html
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/maps-and-graphics/the-most-obese-fattest-countries-in-the-world/
http://undergroundhealthreporter.com/health-benefits-of-spinach-include-improving-memory/

Why People Need to Get Off The Couch (Before It’s Too Late)

How much time do you spend sitting on the couch?

Ponder this question for a couple of minutes – and be honest with yourself. Let’s do a bit of sampling from the U.S. population. All of these numbers are averages derived from reputable sources, e.g., Gallup.

“41 percent of Americans (do) less than 30 minutes of moderate exercise five times per week. About a third of males are physically inactive, compared to 47.4 percent of women – a difference of almost 14 points.” ~ The Lancet

  • The average commute time in the U.S. is approximately 25 minutes one-way, or 50 minutes total.
  • The average American logs around 35 hours of work per week (~ 7 hours per day)
  • If you’re keeping tract, the total is (so far):  ~ 8 hours sitting (minimum)
  • 36 percent sit for another 1-2 hours watching TV
  • 10 percent play video games for 1-2 hours
  • 25 percent lounge around for 1-2 hours
  • 29 percent use their P.C. for 1-2 hours
  • Average time sitting: ~ 13 hours
  • Average time sleeping ~ 7 hours

Total amount of sedentary (inactive) time: ~ 20 hours

Reality Check Time

“I’m doing this for your own good.” Remember your mom or dad saying this before talking some sense into you? (Or trying to.)

Well, we’re saying this for your (and our) own good. You are (again, including us) probably sitting on your butt for much longer than is healthy.  It’s much better to grudgingly accept this fact now than wait for some ailment to threaten your quality of life.

So, first, we will go over why you should get off of your derriere. Second, we will provide some excellent (if we may say) and time-effective ways for doing so.

Let’s do this!

Health Experts Urge People To Get Off The Couch Before It’s Too Late

Okay, good news or bad news? We know…

Studies are about as fun to research and disseminate as performing your own root canal. So, let’s spare you the dental procedure and cut the research down to parts:

  • Sitting 13-14 hours increases your risk of death from heart disease.
  • The more you sit, the higher your blood sugar, cholesterol, triglycerides, and even waist size.
  • A 10-year study, published in The Journals of Gerontology: Medical Sciences of participants aged 50 to 71 years, found “those who tended to sit the most and move the least had more than three times the risk of difficulty walking by the end of the study.”
  • The same study also reports “those who watched five or more hours of TV (had) a 65 percent greater risk of reporting a mobility [disability].”

T.V. and Tech Ain’t Helping

Loretta DiPietro of the Milken School of Public Health at George Washington University doesn’t mix words when it comes to TV and ill health:

“Sitting and watching TV for long periods, especially in the evening, has got to be one of the most dangerous things that older people can do.”

Bear in mind that Dr. DiPietro was referring to a study conducted in the mid-90’s to 2005. Given that use of streaming services, a la Netflix and YouTube, have seen a sharp increase since then, the problem is much likely worse.

“Even 5 minutes is better than nothing.”

That’s an actual quote from an actual doctor – and it’s true. A simple solution? Get out of your chair every half-hour and “stand up, march in place, jump around, kick legs – do anything to move for at least one to two minutes.”

For a healthy and mobile person, there is no excuse not to do something as easy as getting up and moving for a minute or two.

One tough lady…

Let’s look at 61-year-old Denver businesswoman Liz King. Ms. King is an entrepreneur who spends eight hours “at least, (looking) at the screen and sitting in the chair.”

As many of you business owners out there know, you don’t just “punch in and punch out.” Most business owners spend far longer than eight hours at their computers. They’re on the phone with customers, looking after employees, and handling administrative tasks for 10-plus hours a day.

Despite her crazy schedule, the 61-year old manages to get in a “brisk” 20-minute walk every day. This lovely woman may take a picture or two of the “occasional wildflower” on her stroll, but she doesn’t slack.

Some Ideas to Get You Off the Couch and Moving

Every time we write an article about anything exercise or health-related (usually the two are mutually inclusive), we try to include the following phrase:

“Exercise DOESN’T need to be boring or time-consuming!”

One more time? Let’s all repeat this together – and with some gusto!

“Exercise DOESN’T need to be boring or time-consuming!”

It doesn’t matter what you do. If you enjoy walking like Ms. King, by all means, walk for 20-30 minutes.

If you love to shoot hoops, that’s exercise!

If you love to ride your bike, that’s exercise!

If you love Jai Alai, that’s exercise! (Do you? I’ve never found anyone.)

Anyways, you get the picture. It’s as simple as finding something you enjoy and breaking a sweat three times per week.

Readers: we’d love to hear any and all recommendations for fitting activity into your day!

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved
Sources:
http://www.npr.org/2011/04/25/135575490/sitting-all-day-worse-for-you-than-you-might-think
http://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2017/09/04/547580952/get-off-the-couch-baby-boomers-or-you-may-not-be-able-to-later

8 Signs You Have A Manipulative Partner

Manipulative people are everywhere.

And when we say everywhere, we mean everywhere. Is this fact saddening? Yes, but it can also be empowering.

The knowledge and acceptance of the omnipresence of manipulation is empowering because you’re less likely to be played “as a fool.”

Perhaps there is no other scenario wherein detecting manipulation early can save us more heartache than in a relationship. Knowing this, we’re going to discuss eight potential signs you’re living with a manipulative partner.

8 Signs You Have A Manipulative Partner

“Healthy social influence occurs between most people, and is part of the give and take of constructive relationships. (However) in psychological manipulation, one person is used for the benefit of another.” ~ Preston Ni, M.S.B.A.

manipulative

1. They don’t help resolve problems

Unhealthy relationships are often teeming with unresolved conflicts. As we’ve mentioned before, some people are more conflict avoidant than others – it’s simply part of their personality.

But frequent and prolonged conflict avoidance in a relationship can be a warning sign, says relationship expert Suzannah Weiss:

“If conflict from days, weeks, or months ago still bother you though you’ve discussed them with your partner, it’s possible they manipulated you into believing the discussion was over before it was,” Weiss says.

2. They weaken your self-confidence

Barrie Davenport, a certified relationship coach, says:

“Emotional manipulators seek out the vulnerabilities of people in order to exploit them. In fact, they may consciously or unconsciously create relationships with people who are the most vulnerable and willing to be controlled.”

Manipulators are close cousins of narcissists. In fact, narcissists are well-known for their extreme manipulative behavior.

If you always seem to be contending with a “push and pull” feeling with your partner, do not ignore it. Many kind people fall into an emotional trap set by manipulators; the important thing now is to act.

3. They have a bunch of “small favors”

A classic manipulative behavior is to throw a bunch of “small favors” at you before getting to the point.

Darlene Lancer, a Marriage and Family Therapist, calls this the ‘foot-in-the-door’ technique, in which the manipulator “(makes) a small request that you agree to, which is followed by the real request. It’s harder to say no, because you’ve already said yes…Now it’s all about them and their complaints, and you’re on the defense.”

4. Emotional blackmail

Emotional blackmail is an abusive type of manipulation that uses guilt, intimidation, rage, shame, or threats. It’s a sick, twisted game that manipulators use to gain the upper hand.

As an illustration, someone in a relationship may hear this from their partner: “I’ve trusted you with my life; now you go and do this. You ought to be ashamed and disgusted. If you pull this again, I’ll just pack up and leave. You can die alone.”

This sounds extreme, right? Well, these type of conversations happen all the time. Bear in mind that the victim has done nothing wrong – it’s all a mirage.

manipulative

5. Use of charm and flattery

On the opposite end of the emotional spectrum is the generous deployment of charming and flattering behaviors – a type of passive-aggressive behavior.

For example, the manipulator may say whatever they think their partner wants to hear. They’re evasive and will offer favors, help, and even gifts in order to be loved and accepted.

Why is this manipulation? Because the person intentionally evades uncomfortable questions, uses criticism, guilt, and self-pity, and always plays the victim. They do these things for no other reason than to “get” the love and respect that has “escaped” them so far in life.

6. Silent treatment

Make no mistake. Extreme quiet is not a typical behavior when resolving a conflict. Preston Ni, a professor of communication and renowned relationship expert, writes “The silent treatment is a head game where silence is used as a form of leverage.”

Silent treatment becomes abusive when the manipulator has established a sense of dominance. It’s a twisted act that renders their partner powerless.

7. Playing dumb

Oh yes, manipulators can turn dumb in a hurry. Clearly, feigning obliviousness isn’t always obvious – if it were, the manipulator would be at a disadvantage.

Instead, they’ll activate their dummy mode under one of two conditions: (1) when they’re called out for doing something wrong, and/or (2) when they’re responsible for doing something (chores, paying a bill, etc.)

Ni states: “Some children use this tactic in order to delay, stall, and manipulate adults into doing for them what they don’t want to do. Some grown-ups use this tactic as well when they have something to hide, or an obligation they wish to avoid.”

8. They’ll hurry a decision

Most normal people will take a bit of time before making an important decision.

Manipulators know this, and will do everything in their power to hurry you up. Why? Because time constraints cloud your judgment. Our working memory – the ‘bottleneck’ that holds information for processing – isn’t effective under such conditions.

Ni states “By applying tension and control onto you, it is hoped that you will ‘crack’ and give in to the aggressor’s demands.”

10 Signs A Man Is Ready to Give You His Heart

Is your guy ready to give his heart to you?

Men can be hard to figure out sometimes, especially if you’re trying to figure out how he feels about you. Society demands that men should talk less about their feelings. In fact, some can often shame them for being too emotional. But, all the same, men do things like fall in love. But when they do, women are often left wondering how they feel about them!

It can be difficult to tell the difference between a guy who is genuinely falling in love, a guy who is just being friendly, and a guy who just wants in your pants. Thankfully, here are some tried and true methods for figuring out whether or not he’s falling for you.

love quote

Here Are 10 Signs A Man Is Ready to Give His Heart to You

“A priceless moment is when the person that you have fallen in love with, looks you right in the eyes to tell you that they have fallen in love with you.” – Unknown

1. He wants to talk on the phone

Like, all the time. Guys who are just your friend or who just want something from you tend to go a more indirect route, like texting or DMing. But when a guy wants to spend his free time talking to you on the phone, it’s a sure sign that he’s got some feelings for you, and they’re very sweet indeed!

It’s a sign that he wants to hear your voice, which is always romantic.

2. He uses pet names when he’s ready to give his heart

When a guy is falling for you, he’s going to use pet names – but something that’s a little more original. He might call you something special, like a pet name that’s more of an inside joke between the two of you. He wants to set you apart from all the other people in his life. Sex expert and author of the ‘Good In Bed’ series Ian Kerner says, “Names like honey, baby, babe, sweetheart (etc.) connote a special intimacy that’s reserved for your significant other.

3. He remembers what you say

This could be about anything – he remembers what your opinion on a certain movie is, or what kind of food you like at a certain restaurant. This is a sign that he’s both listening, and he values your opinions on things. Not only that, but when the topic comes up again, he’s able to remember your exact words.

4. He makes up excuses to talk to you

Whether it’s on the phone, by text or social media, he finds reasons to pay you a little bit of extra attention. When you post a new selfie on Instagram, he’s always the first one in the comments. He always has something interesting to share with you via text, or he’s always finding reasons to drop by and have a chat. He just can’t get enough of you!

relationships

5. He’s chivalrous

A lot of people think that chivalry is dead, but with him, it’s alive and well. He’s always making sure that you’re comfortable. He’ll do everything from holding doors open for you, to pulling out your chair, to making sure that the temperature in the room is just right. If you’re cold, he’ll probably even offer you his jacket. He wants to make sure that you’re feeling good, and will go to great lengths to ensure it.

6. When he sees you, his whole face lights up

You’ve probably experienced having your whole face light up before – it’s something you can physically feel happening to you, and it’s not altogether voluntary! The same thing happens to him when he sees you from across the room, or walking toward him down the street. He can’t stop the light in his eyes or the big, dopey, love-struck grin when he sees you.

7. He brings you gifts

Relationship expert Dr. Pam Spurr says this:

If he’s given you a nice piece of jewelry then he’s seriously committed to your relationship. Men just don’t give the good stuff unless you mean something special.

The gifts that he brings you don’t always have to be expensive or extravagant. In fact, he’ll most likely bring you little things, but often. Perhaps he learns your coffee order, and brings it to you in the morning.

Or, maybe he brings you a book that you mentioned wanting to read – or even a book that he just thinks you might like! It’s the little things that count, and a guy who pays attention enough to know what you like is a guy who’s falling for you.

8. He’s protective of you

A guy who’s falling in love with you will want to make sure that you feel safe and secure wherever you go together. He’ll often walk you home and right up to your door, or wait in the car outside to make sure you get in safe. He’ll hold your hand when you walk through a crowd, or guide you with a hand on the back of your shoulders.

9. He’s genuinely interested in you

He wants to know what you have to say about everything! No topic of conversation is off limits for you two. Not only that, but no topic of conversation seems too boring for him to engage in.

He’ll be happy to listen to you talk about your favorite TV show, or how awful your co-workers have been that week. Whatever it is, he’s always interested in what you have to say.

relationship stages

10. He’s planning for the future if he’s ready to give his heart

A guy who isn’t interested in the long haul isn’t likely to make plans more than a couple of weeks in advance. On the other hand, when a guy is falling for you, he’s going to plans three or four months into the future. It means that he’s seeing you in his future plans. Moreover, he wants you to be there with him every step of the way.

Like online dating expert Julie Spira mentions, “While the conversation might not include ring shopping, if he’s suggesting things he wants to do in the future, such as a weekend away, going with him to a concert, or even discussing relationship goals, he’s a guy that sees you by his side.

Sure, sometimes guys are hard to get to talk about their feelings – but actions always speak louder than words! A guy who is acting like this is most certainly falling in love, even if he has a hard time saying it. Learning to read his affection in the things that he does will make it much easier to figure out if a guy is ready, willing, and able to give his heart to you.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved.

Relationship Experts Explain What Happens When You Meet The Woman of Your Dreams

Some people (men and women alike) may know right away when the woman they’re seeing is the One. Others may be a bit slower on the uptake. Some may not know the signs to look for.

What exactly should you be looking for to make sure you’re dating the woman of your dreams? According to wedding officiant and author Rev. Laurie Sue Brockway, “There is usually a telltale sign that lets you know when true love has arrived – a voice in your head, a sense of recognition or a gut feeling that this is someone special to you.”

If you’re connecting with your soulmate, there are certain things that you’ll experience that are out of the ordinary from all of the other women you’ve ever dated.

Here Are 9 Things That Happen When You Meet Your Dream Girl

woman

1. You’ll be surprised by your feelings

These feelings will come hard and fast, and you’ll be completely surprised by how quickly you develop them. You may be slower to fall in love with other women, but when you’ve met your soulmate, you’ll be floored by the strength and depth of your feelings. Despite how quickly it happens, you’re not going to feel intimidated. In fact, it’ll feel like the most natural thing in the world.

2. Your attraction will keep growing

Obviously, you’ll feel attracted to her right off the bat. But the thing is, that attraction is only going to keep growing every single day. You’re never going even to want to look at another woman. Her personality and her looks are only going to keep growing on you. You’re also going to feel totally and completely satisfied. There’s nothing about her that you would change.

3. You’re not afraid of disagreements

In some relationships, an argument can be the end. However, when you meet the woman of your dreams, you won’t be afraid to have an argument or disagreement with her. You’ll know that your love is strong enough to survive any spat. In fact, you’ll find that your arguments are over quicker, and you’re more easily able to reconcile and apologize to one another.

4. You’ll always feel loved

The woman of your dreams will never leave you feeling unloved or underappreciated. Some relationships are more casual, and can leave us wanting for emotional connection. However, you’ll know that she’s the One when you feel emotionally fulfilled and appreciated. She makes you feel special every single day, and never takes you for granted.

soulmates

5. You share common goals

An important part of any long-lasting relationship is having goals and visions of the future that complement one another. When you meet the woman of your dreams, you’ll realize that you never have to sacrifice your vision of the future, because she’ll have similar goals in life.

Clinical psychologist and relationship expert Dr. Carmen Harra states, “More diminutive opinions will differ, but soulmates generally have the same virtues and values and see the world through a similar lens.”

Therefore, while you may not have the exact same goals, the things you want to achieve work side by side to make a happy life.

6. You adore each other’s annoying habits

Maybe she takes too long in the bathroom getting ready in the morning, or leaves her hair ties lying around all over the apartment. It doesn’t matter – you’re going to find those little quirks to be some of the best things about her that you love.

Brockway adds, “Soulmates often feel a sense of the familiar and a sense of comfort around each other. Many people say it’s easier to relax into that person and allow themselves to be vulnerable.” When you meet the woman of your dreams, you’re going to love every single thing about her … even the things that you disliked in past partners.

7. Your feelings will feel natural

Nothing about how you feel will be surprising or scary to you. If you’ve never been the type of man to commit to a woman before, you’ll suddenly find yourself totally ready to be with her for however long she wants you. And the best part is, these feelings will be entirely natural.

8. You’ll feel safe in each other’s company

Contrary to popular belief, even men need to feel safe and secure in a relationship. And when you meet the woman of your dreams, she’s going to make you feel entirely safe. You’ll be able to tell her things that you’ve never told anyone else.

Author Karen M. Black states, “If you’re fortunate enough to meet someone with whom you have a natural, loving relationship from the get-go, then you’re going to feel this as an unusual comfort level. A low hum. A peace and calm in your heart. A quiet certainty. A curiosity. Safety in their presence.”

Oftentimes, men have a harder time sharing their emotions. It won’t feel difficult with her – you’ll find yourself opening up and sharing things with her you haven’t told any of your past partners.

woman

9. You’ll want to protect your relationship

If you’re still hanging around with single guys who aren’t interested in a relationship, you won’t tolerate taking any jabs about how deeply you feel for your partner. You may find that you’ll want to protect your relationship more than you’ve ever wanted to before. Your relationship means more to you than any other relationship, and you’ll want to protect it – and her.

Society often finds ways to make men feel like they can’t experience the full range of emotions that come with falling in love. However, men have all the same feelings that women do, and they’ll experience all the same emotions when they meet their soulmates. Finding the woman of your dreams will be one of the most amazing things ever happening to you. You’ll find yourself putting more time and effort into this relationship than any other – and the results will be phenomenal.

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