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11 Quotes to Remember When You’re Stuck In The Past

May 20, 2017 by Power of Positivity

You cannot move forward or enjoy the present when stuck in the past.

“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” – The Buddha

This quote by Buddha is a global favorite regarding the past, present, and future – it’s one of my favorite quotes, period. Let’s break down quickly what The Buddha was saying here:

“Do not dwell in the past” is to resist the mind’s attempts to define ourselves by our mistakes. “Do not dream of the future,” as this takes away the joy described in Buddha’s final point, to “concentrate the mind on the present moment.”

To not dwell on the past is much easier said than done. We all have an innate negativity bias, which is (unfortunately) the brain’s natural, default state.

Negativity bias (also known as the negativity effect) can be defined as “Things of a more negative nature (e.g. unpleasant thoughts, emotions, or social interactions; harmful/traumatic events) have a greater effect on one’s psychological state and processes than do neutral or positive things.”

We’re also prone to remembering negative events than positive ones. This is one of the reasons why psychological illnesses like depression, anxiety, PTSD, and others can be tough to overcome.

Do you feel stuck? Nobody wants to live in the past, certainly not those who have experienced a degree of harm and trauma that eludes most of us.

Why are quotes so powerful?

Many people will turn to a motivational quote for encouragement when things get tough. Why is this? Simply put, human beings are aspirational; we desire to become better versions of ourselves. Importantly, this truth holds whether the circumstances surrounding our need for aspiration are positive or negative.

To illustrate the above point, let’s use a fictional story of two people going through a set of two very different circumstances.

Kim, a successful and driven businesswoman, one day aspires to be the head of her company. She knows this is not an easy path, particularly for women, who are still woefully underrepresented in corporate leadership positions. Kim always seems to find inspiration from quotes by Mary Barra, the CEO of General Motors. One of Kim’s favorites:

“I never want to get a job because I’m female. I want to get it because I’ve earned it and I deserve it…Whether my hair is (blue or purple), people should be judged on how well they do their job.”

Larry is a victim of clinical depression and finds it difficult to get out of bed. His illness seems to have deprived him of his natural disposition as a proud and vigorous man. But Larry knows there’s something still there – and this quote by Helen Keller gives hope and strength:

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”

Indeed, quotes can be beautiful and inspirational. Though fictional in this story, Kim and Larry represent two very real types of individuals in today’s society.

11 Quotes to Remember When You’re Stuck In The Past

1. “Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” – Buddha

2. “Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” – Melody Beattie

3. “Yesterday’s the past, tomorrow’s the future, but today is a gift. That why it’s called the present.” – Bil Keane

4. “Live out your imagination. Not your history.” – Stephen R. Covey

5. “A ship does not sail with yesterday’s wind.” – Louis L’Amour, The Walking Drum

6. “Holding on is believing that there’s a past; letting go is knowing that there’s a future.” – Daphne Rose Kingma

7. “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need.” – Lao Tzu

8. “Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.” – Oprah Winfrey

9. “The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” – Steve Maraboli

10. “Suffering is not holding you. You are holding suffering. When you become good at the art of letting sufferings go, then you’ll come to realize how unnecessary it was for you to drag those burdens around with you. You’ll see that no one else other than you was responsible. The truth is that existence wants your life to become a festival.” – Osho

11. “Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.” – Mother Teresa

5 Ways to Flush Gluten Out Of Your Body

May 20, 2017 by Power of Positivity

Individuals with celiac disease, a hereditary autoimmune condition that affects 3 million Americans, or roughly 1 percent of the population, must avoid gluten. – U.S. News and World Report

The chances are that you have heard all of the hoopla surrounding this “gluten,” but are unsure about what the hubbub is all about. Well, let’s (attempt to) properly educate you before going any further.

Gluten is an ingredient – a protein composite – found in several types of grains, including barley, rye, spelt and wheat. Gluten comprises of two proteins: gliadin and glutenin.

Your next question may be “Is gluten bad?” Not necessarily from a medical perspective; unless you have celiac disease (CD) or are gluten intolerant. CD is a hereditary condition that requires the person to abstain entirely from gluten. Gluten intolerance (i.e. Gluten Sensitivity) is defined as “digestive and (other) health problems caused by eating gluten or wheat.”

The debate about whether or not gluten is “healthy” persists, and is beyond the scope of this article. Various medical publications conclude that abstinence from gluten without any medical reason, such as CD or wheat intolerance, can deprive a person of necessary nutrients.

This article focuses on methods of purging the body of gluten. The five methods described below are incredibly healthy and helpful for people who do not tolerate gluten well.

For the gluten intolerant, or for those that have been “glutened” (having eaten the stuff with a medical condition accidentally) this article is for you.

Here are five ways to flush gluten out of your body:

1. Rest, rest, and rest

For someone who can’t tolerate gluten, the physiological effects of consumption can be stressful and worrisome. For children with CD, for example, consuming gluten can lead to stomach pain and cramping, chronic diarrhea, constipation, vomiting, fatigue, irritability, and other severe symptoms.

It is certainly not advisable for a person experiencing the nasty aftereffects of gluten ingestion to carry on as usual. The “treatment” regimen of rest – and other recommendations forthcoming – should get you back to feeling normal within a couple of days.

2. Eat probiotics

Probiotics are healthy bacteria for the gut – and should be considered an essential in flushing the body of gluten. Consuming gluten wreaks havoc on the gut, including the gastrointestinal tract (GI) and other parts of the digestive system. Probiotics will keep some of the nasty side effects at bay until the gut can recover.

Probiotic-rich foods include sauerkraut, fermented vegetables, miso soup, tempeh, pickles, kefir, and yogurt. Natural foods are the best sources of probiotics, though quality supplements are available on the market.

3. Drink water

Drinking plenty of water helps to flush any toxins or unnatural fluids that have accumulated in the system. Additionally, consuming gluten may lead to an array of symptoms which water may help alleviate; these symptoms include brain fog, diarrhea, fatigue, constipation, headaches, and dizziness.

Gas and bloating is another common issue, and a combination of warm water with ginger and lemon may help. Coconut water, high in electrolytes, may help to expedite the body’s recovery from glucose exposure.

4. Avoid “trigger foods”

Certain foods may exacerbate the symptoms associated with gluten intolerance. Any known foods that cause the slightest of allergic reactions are best avoiding, as are any foods that may counteract the body’s attempts of eliminating gluten. Common foods that fit this description include dairy, eggs, nuts, seeds, and gluten-free grains.

Here are some well-tolerated foods to consider: sweet potatoes, fruits, vegetables, organic meats, and quality fats. Avocados, coconut oil, and olive oil are all considered “healing fats” by some.

5. Light exercise

Depending on the severity of symptoms, a light workout – one just enough to stimulate blood circulation – may assist with gluten recovery. Proper circulation of blood permits the transporting of oxygen and nutrients to organs and muscles – something considered essential when recovering from illness.

Dynamic stretching is a good regimen for those recovering from gluten exposure and accomplishes the aims mentioned above.

Dynamic stretching exercises involve “(moving) a muscle in and out of the stretched position in a controlled and repeated manner.” Examples of dynamic exercises include arm circles, front lunges, jumping jacks, high knees, and side lunges.

If you’re too tired or weak to perform dynamic stretches, try simple stretching exercises instead. (Think “chair exercises” that people do at work.)

References:
Gorman, F. Does Stretching Help Blood Flow Through Muscles? (n.d.). Retrieved May 9, 2017, from http://healthyliving.azcentral.com/stretching-blood-flow-through-muscles-13314.html
Harvard Health Publications. (2009, June). Getting out the gluten. Retrieved May 9, 2017, from http://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/getting-out-the-gluten
Hoffman, S.K. (2011, November 30). 6 Things I Do When Gluten Attacks. Retrieved May 9, 2017, from http://www.sarahkayhoffman.com/2011/11/30/6-things-i-do-when-gluten-attacks

Research Reveals The Most Important Exercise For Your Brain

May 20, 2017 by Power of Positivity

Exercise in any form is, arguably, the best thing you can do for a healthy body and brain (along with excellent nutrition!).

Concerning brain benefits, any exercise promotes brain health. Here’s a snippet from a Harvard Medical School (HMS) article titled Regular exercise changes the brain to improve memory, thinking skills:

“Exercise helps memory and thinking through both direct and indirect means. The benefits of exercise come directly from its ability to reduce insulin resistance, reduce inflammation, and stimulate the release of growth factors – chemicals in the brain that affect the health of brain cells, the growth of new blood vessels in the brain, and even the abundance and survival of new brain cells.”

But have you ever wondered what the best type of exercise is for your brain is?

Research Reveals The Most Important Exercise For Your Brain

“Regular aerobic exercise will bring remarkable changes to your body, your metabolism, your heart, and your spirits. It has a unique capacity to exhilarate and relax, to provide stimulation and calm, (and) to counter and dissipate stress.” – Harvard Heath Publications

The answer: any exercise that gets you moving, gets your heart rate up, and breaks a sweat using repetitive motion – in other words, aerobic exercise.

Aerobic exercise defined

The American College of Sports Medicine (ACSM) defines aerobic exercise as “any activity that uses large muscles groups, can be maintained continuously, and is rhythmic in nature.”

When we think of the term ‘aerobic exercise,’ too often we picture someone jogging or running on a treadmill or sidewalk, but this is a misconception. Here’s a short list of aerobic exercises:

Walking
Running
Swimming
Cycling
Rowing
Boxing
Kickboxing
Dancing

The aerobic exercise and brain connection

The science supporting the link between aerobic exercise and brain health is well-documented. The benefits of regular aerobic exercise on the brain are numerous as well; all of which are attributed to behavioral and chemical changes that take place.

First, we must look at the neurochemical mechanisms of aerobic exercise. Exercise that engages the lungs and increases circulation – as aerobic exercise does – decreases the body’s levels of stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol, which explains why any aerobic exercise is effective at relieving stress.

Further, aerobic exercise stimulates the production and discharge of endorphins – brain chemicals that serve as the body’s homemade mood elevators and natural painkillers. The “runner’s high” – a sense of euphoria after the body’s been pushed – that many people experience after a grueling workout are due to this release of endorphins.

After a short period, the behavioral changes via positive reinforcement will become apparent. In other terms, you’ll not only notice a trimmer waistline and a renewed sense of strength and stamina but an improvement in your self-image and self-confidence. This positive behavioral feedback will quickly improve your quality of life; pushing you to set and achieve any current and set goals.

Perhaps just as important as the neurochemical and behavioral benefits of aerobic exercise is the “escape” that such exercise provides. When our body is moving, our mind is free from any and all worries and distractions. Exercise, then, often becomes a form of recreation – we no longer view exercise as a “must do, ” but a “want to do.”

Aerobic exercise and brain benefits

The benefits of aerobic exercise on the brain are numerous and diverse, in both the short-term and long-term. Of course, acquiring desired benefit(s) from aerobic exercise is highly dependent on the frequency and duration of activity. Age is also a factor regarding aerobic activity and benefits.

Short-term benefits on the brain and body

When engaging in aerobic exercise, you are increasing the amount of blood flow and oxygen to your brain. As mentioned, the brain also releases endorphins and reduces the production of stress hormones. In conjunction, these and other physiological mechanisms produce short-term brain benefits such as:

An increased sense of well-being
reduction in anxiety and depression symptoms
Better overall mood
Improvement in sleep quality
Increased motivation to exercise regularly (long-term)
Improved working memory

Long-term benefits on the brain and body

The most dramatic benefits of aerobic exercise on the brain are a result of regular, consistent activity. Another factor affecting long-term benefits is the level of physical exertion during exercise. For example, 30 to 45-minute HIIT sessions performed over three months produces different benefits (and to a different degree) than a 30 minute, moderately-paced jogging regimen over the same period.

In a study conducted by researchers from the University of British Columbia, scientists discovered that regular aerobic exercise increased the volume of the hippocampus, “a key part of the inner brain involved in forming, storing, and processing memory.” Promisingly, the greatest benefits were observed in older participants with mild cognitive impairment (MCI), which is often an antecedent of dementia.

Aside from boosting the size of the hippocampus, other long-term brain benefits of aerobic exercise may include:

Improved spatial abilities
Increased self-awareness
Better emotional regulation
Improved overall cognitive function (thinking, reasoning)
Dramatic decrease in risk of dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease

11 Signs A Man Respects You In A Relationship

May 19, 2017 by Power of Positivity

Do you know how to tell if someone respects you in a love relationship? Respect is the profound admiration for someone, their abilities, qualities, or accomplishments.

People with “good, valuable, or important” qualities are another way of describing respect. Respecting someone’s humanity is perhaps the best kind of respect we can give (and receive.) How much more should we respect someone who has given us their heart?

Regarding respect and relationships, having one without the other isn’t possible. The two qualities are mutually inclusive in every healthy relationship.

NOTE: We acknowledge that women display respect in slightly different ways than men. Thus, we address signs a woman respects her relationship in a separate companion article.

Five Reasons Why It Is Essential That Your Man Respects Your Relationship

Respectfulness is a crucial element for building and maintaining a healthy love relationship. It is the foundation of any meaningful relationship and serves as a guiding principle in how partners treat and interact. In a healthy love relationship, respect is essential for fostering trust, communication, and a sense of safety and security.

Trusting your partner

First and foremost, respect is essential for fostering trust in a relationship. Trust is built on mutual respect and honesty. Without it, the relationship is likely to crumble. When partners show respect towards each other, they create a safe space where they can be vulnerable and share their innermost thoughts and feelings. This trust is essential for building a deep emotional connection and for overcoming obstacles that may arise in the relationship.

Better communication to keep the relationship strong

Communication is also essential in a healthy love relationship, and respect plays a significant role in creating effective communication between partners. Respectful communication involves actively listening to each other, understanding each other’s perspectives, and valuing each other’s input. In a relationship where respect is present, partners feel heard and valued, leading to deeper conversations and a stronger emotional bond.

Feeling a sense of security

Respect is essential for creating a sense of safety and security in a relationship. When partners respect each other, they create an environment where each person feels comfortable being themselves without fear of judgment or criticism. This environment allows partners to be vulnerable with each other and fosters a sense of emotional security in the relationship. In contrast, a relationship lacking in respect can create an atmosphere of tension and uncertainty, leading to feelings of insecurity and doubt.

Relationship equality builds both partners

Another way in which respectfulness is necessary for a healthy love relationship is by promoting fairness and equality between partners. When partners show respect towards each other, they treat each other fairly and as equals, valuing each other’s opinions, needs, and desires. In contrast, a relationship lacking in respect can create an imbalance of power, leading to one partner dominating or controlling the other. Such an imbalance can lead to resentment and tension, ultimately damaging the relationship.

Fairer fights

Respectfulness also helps partners navigate those inevitable conflicts healthily and productively. In a respectful relationship, partners work together to find solutions to conflicts, using open and honest communication to address their issues. They do not resort to name-calling, blaming, or personal attacks, and instead, focus on finding common ground and working towards a solution that benefits both partners. This approach to conflict resolution promotes a sense of teamwork and strengthens the emotional bond between partners.

11 Signs A Man Respects You In A Relationship

In this article, we list and discuss 11 signs that the man you’re in a relationship with respects you. Let’s get started!

Respect is not an option in a relationship. It is a requirement.” ~ Anon.

1. He is encouraging

A man who loves and respects you wants what you want. He desires his woman to be the best possible version of herself, something that not only makes you feel good but him as well. He may have an opinion on the matter, but he won’t dissuade you from taking any positive step in your life.

2. He respects your time and how you spend it

Another sign of a healthy relationship is regard for each other’s time – whether spent together or apart. Concerning the former, a respectful man is reliable regarding your (and others’) time. He is rarely late; when he is, he has a good explanation. When you need some time, for whatever reason, he is considerate and respectful.

(Note: spending over an hour in the bathroom may be an exception to this rule.)

3. He doesn’t get jealous

He’s devoted himself to you and is confident in your devotion to him. As such, a man who respects you doesn’t get jealous. This quality also speaks to the man’s self-confidence – something (sadly) that is absent in too many. Comment on Brad Pitt’s abs all you want, ladies!

4. He doesn’t try to control you

Controlling behavior reeks of insecurity and, of course, disrespect. As mentioned, thoughtful men are neither of these things. A respectful man who loves you wouldn’t even contemplate taking any action that could be considered controlling. Enough said.

5. Your opinions are taken seriously

Opinions are a matter of individual perspective and should always be respected. A respectful man actively listens and responds to your opinion. Moreover, the man is interested in what you have to say, regardless of whether he agrees or disagrees.

Speaking of which…

6. He doesn’t escalate disagreements

At the risk of sounding overtly obvious, every relationship has disagreements and arguments. One sign of a real man is respectful behavior – and he’s never inclined to intensify any disagreement or argument. He appreciates and respects the differences just as he does the similarities. Aside from demonstrating his respect, the ability to “agree to disagree” shows his strength and character.

7. He’s an “Honest Abe”

It can be difficult to discern whether or not someone is completely honest with you. However, a man who deeply respects his woman considers dishonest behavior abhorrent. If he says or does something he perceives as inaccurate, he’ll say so.

8. He doesn’t second-guess you

A healthy relationship requires two people to commit themselves entirely – to be selfless. A man who respects you (and vice-versa) will not ignorantly cast doubt upon your choices or judgment. He understands that you possess an admirable ability to think for yourself; otherwise, he wouldn’t be with or respect you to such a high degree.

9. He’ll discuss the relationship’s future

Some men have the impulse to evade discussing “the future.” Perhaps they’re not quite prepared for topics that you may bring up, which may scare them. But a man who respects you will actively listen to your perspective on the future and provide honest feedback, even if it’s not quite what you seek. If he’s ready for the next step, he’ll tell you. If he’s not ready, he’ll still tell you.

10. He spends a good amount of time with you

A man who respects you willingly allocates a generous amount of time to make sure you’re happy. If you enjoy certain activities, he knows and will go out of his way to make them happen. Even if he’s busy, a respectful man will sacrifice time he could spend elsewhere – at work, hanging out with friends, etc. – for you to know that you’re a priority.

11. He respects others

“Others” may be your family, social circle, or a stranger. The respect a man shows to others is equally as important to the respect he shows you. For those in the early phases of a relationship, observing how your man treats others is one of the best indications of his real character.

Final Thoughts on Signs Your Man Respects Your Relationship

Respectfulness is a necessary ingredient for building and maintaining a healthy love relationship. It promotes trust, effective communication, emotional security, fairness and equality, and productive conflict resolution. Without respect, a relationship will quickly fill with tension, resentment, and an imbalance of power. Therefore, partners must practice respect towards each other and make it a guiding principle in their relationship.

Why Crying During Movies Actually Means You’re Mentally Tough

May 19, 2017 by Power of Positivity

Social scientists know that we tend to have a prejudice against those who cry during movies. Our tendency is to see people who cry as being emotionally weak.

Rarely is crying during movies interpreted as being mentally tough. But if we can set our negative stereotypes aside, we can see how emotional outpourings like crying can help us socially. In fact, it helps connect to others by helping them see how well we relate to their emotions.

Why Crying During Movies Actually Means You’re Mentally Tough

Crying during movies means you have the skills of an empath. Empathy is a skill that allows you to understand how someone else must be feeling based on what you either know about the situation they are experiencing or by their observable behavior.

The character Commander Deanna Troi on the TV series Star Trek: Next Generation is the best popular culture reference to understand what an empathetic or empathic person is like.

Crying during movies means you possess the ability to relate to the emotional state that another person is experiencing based on their situation and facial expressions.

Although you know that this pain belongs to someone else, for example an actor in a movie, you know what it feels like to hurt, grieve, yearn, or rejoice and you can relate to a fellow human being who is showing the same emotion.

Empaths have to be mentally tough because emotional outpourings can drain physical energy. Connection like this to fellow people on the planet is an important social skill that is often overlooked or undervalued. The ability to relate in important ways will help you be successful with your education, career, and romantic partnerships.

Crying during movies connects to emotional intelligence, extroversion, and self-esteem

Researchers studying crying during movies found that several personality traits were found to be associated with crying and sadness. These include empathy, extroversion, femininity, self-esteem, and prior stress levels.

Women who cried during a movie also reported being sad to the researchers afterward. Conversely, men who cried reported no emotional connection to the film.

Mentally tough people usually take the leadership role in social interactions. And that seems to conflict with the image of someone who cries at movies. However, being extroverted was one of the surprising personality trait results of the above experiment.

The researchers found that these personality traits were associated with crying during movies and ego strength or self-esteem levels, which is the mental toughness in knowing oneself to be worthy of respect.

You might say that people who cry during movies have an advantage over others. Picking up on emotional cues based on tone, facial expressions, body language, micro-expressions, and your gut instinct helps you to identify if the people you interact with are pleased or displeased.

Here’s how these observed responses connect to emotions:

Understanding Tone

The tone of voice is crucial to communication, revealing emotions and attitudes that may not be explicitly stated. It encompasses pitch, volume, and pace. Indeed, it can indicate feelings like anger, happiness, or uncertainty. For instance, a raised voice might signify anger or excitement, while a monotonous tone could suggest boredom or disinterest. By attentively listening to the tone, you can gauge the emotional state and intent of the speaker, which aids in better understanding their perspective.

Interpreting Facial Expressions

Facial expressions are powerful indicators of someone’s emotional state. Through facial cues, humans instinctively recognize emotions such as happiness, sadness, anger, and surprise. A smile, for example, generally indicates happiness or approval, while a frown usually signifies displeasure or concern. Learning to interpret these expressions accurately can provide valuable insight into how someone is feeling, even if they don’t verbalize it.

Reading Body Language

Body language is a non-verbal communication that includes gestures, posture, and movements. Open body language, like uncrossed arms, can indicate receptiveness and comfort, while closed body language, such as crossed arms or avoiding eye contact, might suggest defensiveness or discomfort. Observing body language in conjunction with other cues can better understand someone’s emotional state.

Analyzing Micro-Expressions

Microexpressions are brief, involuntary facial expressions that reveal genuine emotions. They are often difficult to catch and interpret, as they occur fleetingly. These expressions can be crucial in detecting hidden feelings or lies. For example, a quick flash of contempt on someone’s face might go unnoticed in a casual interaction but can indicate underlying negative feelings.

Trusting Your Gut Instinct

Gut instinct, or intuition, plays a significant role in reading others. It’s an instinctive feeling that often arises without conscious reasoning. Trusting your gut can help quickly judge someone’s intentions or feelings. Past experiences and knowledge shape this instinct, and while it’s not infallible, it can be a valuable tool for understanding social dynamics.

This is the kind of information that marketing professionals harness to determine consumer preference for or against a product.

Final Thoughts on Crying During Movies

Crying during movies is part of the experience of totally immersing yourself in a movie. In another study, researchers looked at the illusion of having two bodies simultaneously during a movie. They say that although we know that the movie is not real, more perceptive people are simultaneously aware of being inside the film and outside of it.

This conflict between being both here in the seat of the theater and also participating in the movie experience of the actors can cause viewers to experience “dizziness and nausea, an unsettling yet – to a certain degree – pleasurable feeling, which is significantly intensified in media environments such as 3-D films and virtual reality.”

References:
Neither Here nor There The Paradoxes of Immersion.
http://web.a.ebscohost.com/abstract?direct=true&profile=ehost&scope=site&authtype=crawler&jrnl=18718787&AN=116581281&h=v7VKcOQddTGnzzUGgFgq%2fOK5sGTxjzy%2b2JR6DlKPJHPBQbkVDnSQGw9hyJ8U7UcXLEphMwLom9I%2fLaNxi%2b6Okw%3d%3d&crl=c&resultNs=AdminWebAuth&resultLocal=ErrCrlNotAuth&crlhashurl=login.aspx%3fdirect%3dtrue%26profile%3dehost%26scope%3dsite%26authtype%3dcrawler%26jrnl%3d18718787%26AN%3d116581281

4 Reasons Women are Scared to Date

May 19, 2017 by Power of Positivity

We all have different perspectives about dating. Some people see it as fun and full of possibilities; others hate it. For the latter group, their glum outlook on dating is understandable, as the path to finding a partner is often a difficult one. “How many more guys/girls can I deal with?” “What the heck is wrong with me?” “What on Earth is wrong with them?”

For those in a relationship, odds are you didn’t find your partner right away. A few of us have even gone through hell and back before finding our love – a time of tremendous joy accompanied by a sense of relief.

The dating uncertainty has made some people fearful – a natural response to vulnerability. Dating is a risk, plain and simple. For women afraid to date, such feelings must be okay. Be patient and wait for when you’re ready.

This article is for you. Here, we discuss four reasons why women are scared to date. For our male readers, you may find that some of these words describe your thoughts and feelings on the subject of dating, as well.

Here are four reasons why women are scared of dating:

“Dating is a risk, with a great reward, just remember you can keep going, or stop at any time, this is your life.” – Anon.

1. She’s afraid of rejection

In two words, rejection sucks. Unfortunately, dating often involves plenty of it – which quickly becomes disheartening. In essence, being rejected is similar to being told “You’re not good enough.”

In addition to the influx of negative emotions, rejection damages psychological well-being. Using Functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging (fMRI), scientists have found that rejection follows the same pathways of the brain that receive pain signals. Rejection literally hurts from a neurological perspective.

Considering the brain’s tendency to relive adverse life events – and the manifestation of emotional and physical pain that rejection brings – it quickly becomes apparent why a woman who has been hurt would fear the notion of dating.

2. She’s dated a person with serious issues

If you’ve ever been with a woman who you deeply cared for, only to have your chances squashed by some ex, then you understand the immense frustration and hurt that affects both people.

Maybe her former was an alcoholic or drug addict, womanizer, manipulator, narcissist, control freak, or any other one of a thousand things. Unfortunately, she’s still wrestling with the abuse to which she was subjected.

Being the target of emotional, psychological, or physical abuse is traumatizing. Sadly, it’s also far too common. According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), 48 percent of women have experienced psychological abuse, 40 percent have experienced emotional manipulation and control, and 19 percent have been physically threatened or harmed.

3. She’s afraid of not being single

There’s a minority out there that loves being single, and the reason is quite simple: they can do whatever, whenever. No partner = no problem. While these women may occasionally “hear it” from their family and friends, it isn’t enough to surrender the awesomeness of “me.” While this perspective is more common in younger women, plenty of happy and successful people have the desire to “get out there.”

For most women who value their singlehood, a time comes when they long for a person to share their life with. This feeling is analogous to dipping your toe in cold water. Jumping in may be refreshing. But first, you’ve got to leap. Remind yourself that there’s no “time limit” to dating aside from those that are self-imposed. Take your time.

4. She is afraid of (a) Commitment or (b) Lack of commitment

While men are usually painted as the more non-committed of the sexes, women can be just as commitment-phobic. Fear of dating, as a byproduct of commitment issues, usually results from one of two things: her fear of commitment or a potential partner’s lack thereof.

There are many reasons for a fear of commitment or being attached to one person for life: fearing the hypothetical ‘end’ of a relationship, not being able to achieve life goals; need for personal space – and so on.

Of the two, fearing lack of commitment from a partner is more ubiquitous. Of the two sexes, it is fair to say that women are considerably more sensitive. As such, women (usually) take breakups harder. Repeated exposure to someone else’s lack of commitment takes a considerable emotional toll, enough to refrain from dating for an indefinite amount of time.

“Dating is a risk, with a great reward, just remember you can keep going, or stop at any time, this is your life.”

There is no shame in admitting that you’re afraid to date – to be vulnerable. Doesn’t matter if you’ve been a victim or if you’re afraid of giving up your own life.

Most importantly, don’t allow anyone else to define happiness for you. Don’t let anyone else tell you how your life “should be.” It’s your life; pursue your version of happiness.

Final Thoughts on Why Women Today Hesitate to Date

The fear of dating is a complex and deeply personal issue for many women. Rejection, often accompanied by emotional pain, can make the prospect of dating daunting. Past relationships with individuals dealing with serious issues can leave lasting scars. As a result, it can be challenging to open up to new possibilities. Some women cherish their singlehood, but eventually, they may yearn for companionship, which can be intimidating. Commitment, whether the fear of it or the absence of it in a partner, can also be a significant barrier to dating.

Remember, there is no right or wrong timeline for dating, and no one should define your path to happiness. Dating is a risk with the potential for great rewards. Still, it’s a journey you can navigate at your own pace. Your life is yours, and pursuing your version of happiness should always be the priority. Embrace your individuality and make choices that align with your desires and aspirations.

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Why are quotes so powerful?

11 Quotes to Remember When You’re Stuck In The Past

Here are five ways to flush gluten out of your body:

1. Rest, rest, and rest

2. Eat probiotics

3. Drink water

4. Avoid “trigger foods”

5. Light exercise

Research Reveals The Most Important Exercise For Your Brain

Aerobic exercise defined

The aerobic exercise and brain connection

Aerobic exercise and brain benefits

Short-term benefits on the brain and body

Long-term benefits on the brain and body

Five Reasons Why It Is Essential That Your Man Respects Your Relationship

Trusting your partner

Better communication to keep the relationship strong

Feeling a sense of security

Relationship equality builds both partners

Fairer fights

11 Signs A Man Respects You In A Relationship

1. He is encouraging

2. He respects your time and how you spend it

3. He doesn’t get jealous

4. He doesn’t try to control you

5. Your opinions are taken seriously

6. He doesn’t escalate disagreements

7. He’s an “Honest Abe”

8. He doesn’t second-guess you

9. He’ll discuss the relationship’s future

10. He spends a good amount of time with you

11. He respects others

Final Thoughts on Signs Your Man Respects Your Relationship

Why Crying During Movies Actually Means You’re Mentally Tough

Crying during movies connects to emotional intelligence, extroversion, and self-esteem

Understanding Tone

Interpreting Facial Expressions

Reading Body Language

Analyzing Micro-Expressions

Trusting Your Gut Instinct

Final Thoughts on Crying During Movies

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Here are four reasons why women are scared of dating:

1. She’s afraid of rejection

2. She’s dated a person with serious issues

3. She’s afraid of not being single

4. She is afraid of (a) Commitment or (b) Lack of commitment

Final Thoughts on Why Women Today Hesitate to Date

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Rise and Shine On! Master Your Day with the Ultimate Positive Morning Guide + Checklist

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