Inspiration to your inbox

5 Signs A ‘Nice’ Person Secretly Has Cruel Intentions

Not every person you meet has good intentions. That’s a fact that many people find out only too late. It’s a common problem within humankind. Everyone from the rich and famous to regular folks face this within their lifetime.

“Sweetie, if you’re going to be two faced, at least make one of them pretty.” – Marilyn Monroe

The late Marilyn Monroe was a beautiful, gifted actress and model; as it turns out, she was quite insightful about the personal manipulation she almost assuredly experienced during her ever-present, adored existence. Ms. Monroe possessed the beauty, allure, and, yes, fortune, that screamed: “Take advantage of me!” But, despite her infamous reputation for playing “dumb blonde” characters, she was an astute judge of character. In fact, she was downright intolerant of those that vainly attempted such. Reportedly, she quickly disbanded those with ulterior motives.

Oh, and the “dumb blonde” reportedly had an IQ of over 160. We digress, however. This article is not about Marilyn Monroe. None of us are Marilyn Monroe, and 99.999 percent of us will never come close to achieving the fame and fortune of this intelligent and beautiful woman.

However, we share one thing in common: we’re all potential victims in the eyes of manipulators.

They’ll smile and speak innocently while deliberately attempting to deceive and control our very minds. Unfortunately, these manipulators all too often get their way.

So, what is the solution? It’s complicated, yet simple: we must remain keenly aware of those around us while never hesitating to take the appropriate action.

We’ll discuss 5 signs of an all-too-common type of manipulator: a “nice person” with diabolical intentions.

Here’s the 5 signs a nice person secretly has negative intentions:

people

1. Conversations are always one-sided if someone has cruel intentions.

No surprise here. Nice people with cruel intentions are programmed to dominate discussions. While some may lack active listening skills, ordinary people will at least attempt to engage in a dialogue. Manipulators of this type are not to be considered ordinary people as it pertains to human conversation.

Here’s the caveat. If the manipulator senses a failure in their conversational tactics, they’ll devise another method to achieve their aims. In some cases, such tactical diversion is a sudden, inexplicable interest in your life and “what’s going on” with you.

Make no mistake, such enigmatic behavior has an explanation: they’re selfish and manipulative. Manipulators are so self-focused that the dialectical spotlight will eventually shine back onto them.

2. A person with cruel intentions may keep repeatedly making demands

Another talent manipulators of this type possess is the ability to wear you down. As an individualistic person of the highest degree, they’ll constantly reiterate – often subtly–the action they wish you to take.

They’ll make demands incessantly. Why? Because their reassuring ego convinces them that their “superior” methods, however ill-conceived, will prevail over their target’s sense of self-control. Don’t allow this to happen. Challenge their words while adamantly refusing to participate in their game.

You’ll win this battle every time, but only if you’re strong enough.

3. Using persuasion as a game

The third on this list relates to the second, as dialogical maneuvers are a favorite tool of manipulators. Similarly, manipulators of this variety have a penchant for persuasion, and whether or not such diversions are effective is irrelevant. They think they are, and that’s all you need to know about such motives.

Persuasion and pressure can be potent weapons, especially when the victim lacks aptitude in discernment. Also, people who have trouble saying “no” can fall victim (sometimes knowingly) to such persuasion.

Use your best judgment, and – regardless of how difficult it may be – muster the fortitude to say no.

4. Abnormal eye contact and body language

Leveraging our interpretation of sustained eye contact can be a weapon for manipulators. To many of us, a steady and confident look indicates trustworthiness. Falsely “nice” people understand this psychological effect – and, of course, use it to their advantage.

Then, there’s the opposite side of the spectrum. Forced (i.e. “long and uncomfortable”) eye contact from the manipulator often indicates a concealed purpose; more specifically, to make someone else do what they want. Pay attention to such patterns.

Should they coincide with other eccentricities, this person – at the very least – requires a sense of caution from our end. Again, judgment and logic must dictate our next course of action.

cruel intentions

5. Feeling “bad” after talking with them

Sometimes it’s necessary to either trust or question your “gut instincts.” This is a logical function of the human brain – to question things. When dealing with a “nice person” that’s anything but, this is certainly an appropriate response.

It bears repeating that manipulative people emit a sense of confusion and mystique to people whom they encounter. As mentioned above, communication is a powerful weapon of manipulators. Their innate ability to disrupt normal thought patterns is one reason why so many have fallen for their gimmicks.

This is when it pays dividends to trust your innate sense regarding the individual’s character. Confusion, anger, frustration, and misunderstanding are among the negative thoughts and feelings you may experience after conversing with such a person.

Here’s the bottom line. One of two facts remains: (1) the other’s personality doesn’t resonate with your own, or (2) the other person possesses manipulative notions.

Either way, they’re not to be considered an ally. Staying friends with this toxic person will become self-destructive in the long run.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

How To Train Your Brain To Stop Worrying

Worrying is an unnecessary evil when it comes to your mental health. Some consider it simply a bad habit that can be unlearned with practice. Some think worrying serves a purpose for the brain, such as helping us to learn from past experiences and prepare for new ones. Whether good or bad, the anxiety that results from worry occupies our brains as we focus on a future we can’t control.

Some say that depression is a focus on past events you wish you could change. They also caution how worrying is focusing on future events you have no control over. Notably, instead of worrying, you can choose to take action by preparing for whatever it is that has you worried. In this article, we will look at active ways you can train your brain to stop worrying.

How To Train Your Brain To Stop Worrying

worrying meme

1. Stop your brain from worrying by writing it down.

This technique might be the most valuable when you are training your brain to stop worrying. If your brain keeps you up at night by thinking about something, put it down on paper. (Electronic formats also work.) This action lets your brain breathe a mental sigh of relief by no longer spending energy trying to remember these details. If you’re worrying about what to serve for a gathering of friends, write down “What to serve?”

Writing it down also is a way for you to put your brain on notice. In other words, you tell your brain, “This is important enough to write down.” Your brain has now been alerted to put resources toward solving this problem rather than being worried.

Why write it down? Researchers now have evidence that chronic worriers may be chronic problem-avoiders, too. Scientists in the journal Anxiety, Stress & Coping allowed worriers to write down three possible outcomes for problematic situations. Then, they analyzed their answers for practical solutions.

The scientists say, “When participants’ problem elaborations were rated for concreteness, both studies showed an inverse relationship between degree of worry and concreteness. The more participants worried about a given topic, the less concrete was the content of their elaboration. The results challenge the view that worry may promote better problem analyses. Instead, they conform to the view that worry is a cognitive avoidance response.”

2. Meditate for a worry-free brain.

Meditation can help train your brain to stop worrying. Researchers in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine studied the effects of meditation and found that meditation is perfect for reducing cognitive anxiety. Although some people believe they do not have time to meditate, meditation is as easy as closing your eyes for thirty seconds or longer. The act of tuning out other sources of stress actively trains your brain to stop worrying.

When you consciously take a few moments to avoid any non-natural noise in your life, you center around what is most important to you. Worrisome thoughts may come to you while you meditate, yet this is normal. Those who have mastered the art of brain-training recommend observing worrisome thoughts as they enter the mind and simply watching them pass like clouds on a breezy day.

3. Exercise to train your body and brain to stop worrying.

Worry is how your brain learns to survive by deciding whether or not to activate the fight-or-flight system. If a cougar jumps out at you, you instantly feel a rush of adrenaline. This fear response is the same thing happening to your body when you worry, just at a much lower level over a more extended period.

The same study in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine found that exercise, on the other hand, is good for you, especially when your body feels anxiety symptoms. If your body feels fewer physical symptoms of stress, your mind will interpret that there must be less to fret about because the body is not in a state of heightened arousal.

Exercise gives the body a secondary reason for the rapid heart rate and perspiration that we may feel when we worry. Exercise can help lower blood pressure, which is another physical symptom of stress in the body. If you identify that you are worrying, go for a five to ten minute walk – get outside if possible. Appreciate the sights and sounds of nature while focusing on the motion of your limbs and the breaths you take.

anxiety

4. Practice mindfulness to stay present and reduce worry

Mindfulness is a powerful technique for staying present and reducing worry. It involves paying full attention to the present moment, with acceptance and without judgment. By practicing mindfulness, you can train your brain to focus on the current situation rather than dwelling on past regrets or future anxieties.

As explained by the University of Massachusetts Memorial Medical Center, mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) significantly decreases worry and associated symptoms. To practice mindfulness, start by taking a few minutes each day to focus on your breath, observe your thoughts and feelings, and engage fully with your surroundings. This practice can help you develop a more balanced perspective and reduce your worries.

5. Establish a regular sleep schedule to enhance mental well-being

Maintaining a consistent sleep schedule is essential for mental health and can significantly reduce worry and stress. Adequate and quality sleep allows the brain to process emotions, consolidate memories, and enhance decision-making skills. When we are well-rested, we are better equipped to handle challenges and manage stressors effectively.

To establish a regular sleep schedule, aim to go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, even on weekends. Create a relaxing bedtime routine to signal to your body that it’s time to wind down. Avoid stimulants such as caffeine and nicotine close to bedtime, and limit exposure to screens, as the blue light emitted can interfere with melatonin production and disrupt sleep.

By prioritizing sleep and ensuring you get the recommended 7-9 hours per night, you can improve your mood, cognitive function, and overall resilience, making it easier to manage worry and maintain a positive outlook.

6. Seek professional help when needed

Sometimes, worries can become overwhelming and interfere with daily life. In such cases, seeking professional help can be beneficial. Therapists and counselors are trained to help individuals develop coping strategies, address underlying issues contributing to worry, and improve mental well-being.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is particularly effective in treating chronic worry and generalized anxiety disorder. Don’t hesitate to reach out to a mental health professional if you find your worries are persistent and affecting your quality of life.

worrying

Final Thoughts on Training Yourself to Stop Worrying

Training your brain to stop worrying is a valuable skill that can significantly improve your quality of life. You can develop a more balanced and resilient mindset by incorporating techniques such as mindfulness, gratitude, and seeking professional help when needed. Remember, it’s normal to worry from time to time, but with practice and persistence, you can reduce the impact of worry on your well-being.

So, addressing worry is not about eliminating it altogether. Instead, it is all about learning how to manage it effectively. Consistent practice of the abovementioned techniques can help you build mental resilience, foster a positive outlook, and navigate life’s challenges with greater ease. Remember that everyone’s journey is unique, so be patient with yourself and stay committed to your mental health journey.

25 Secret Signs He’s Confessing His Love For You

Are you wondering if your new partner is falling in love with you?

“Well, it seems to me that the best relationships – the ones that last – are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship…one day you look at a person and you see something more…Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is…suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.” Gillian Anderson

In the above quote, Ms. Anderson is right on the money – at least when friends become lovers.

Her insight in this regard, however, can extend to the many ways in which people’s feelings transform from something else into love for another; whether such transformation takes place during friendship or dating, the premise is the same: we will ultimately “confess” our love.

In most cases, but not all, the woman is more upfront about her feelings, whatever they may be. As for men, well, the picture is often a bit more opaque.

Some guys are comfortable expressing affection, but most men have a hard time expressing romantic feelings – at least  verbally (e.g. “I love you,” “You’re beautiful”). It’s much easier to decipher the man’s behavior. We call these “love signs,” or “secret signs.”

EDITOR’S NOTE: If you’d life to find an article about the behaviors when a female confesses love, here’s a companion article to read.

being compassionate

Here are 25 such signs that a man is confessing his love for you:

1. In a social setting, the man will most often give you more attention than anyone else in the room.

2. He restrains from acting annoyed, even if something you do is a pet peeve or “pushes his buttons.”

3. He remembers meaningful days, such as your birthday or other dates of importance.

4. He doesn’t hesitate to make you his number one priority, even if it means going out of his way.

5. He defends you if someone attempts to bad talk or harm you in any imaginable way.

6. He always wants to spend time with you and loves every second of it. He’ll seemingly always go out of his way to do so, if necessary.

7. He always talks and opens up to you about nearly everything in his life – from his friends to his work.

8. He can’t stay mad at you for very long. He’ll often make the effort to apologize or accept your apology.

9. He tries hard to “fit in” with your friends and family members. He cares a lot about what they have to say.

10. He’ll sacrifice his happiness, comfort, and so on, if it means that you are better off.

11. He’ll text or call you before heading to bed. Often, you’re the person he speaks with last.

12. He is always respectful regardless of the situation. He won’t doe-eye other girls in your presence, or cut you off while you’re speaking.

13. He keeps you informed about his life and what’s going on; even if it’s a small matter.

14. He won’t be afraid to swallow his pride and apologize to you in the event he does something hurtful.

15. He’ll help whenever he’s asked, from the smallest favor to something that demands his full attention and effort.

16. He eagerly wants to know about your life, from your childhood to work – and everything in between.

17. He’s protective of you in many ways. For example, does he request a call or text to know you got home safely? Does he “guide” you across the street or while walking?

18. He’ll include the word “we” instead of “Me” or “I” when discussing something that includes you. He often does this by choice, as he wants to include you in many things as possible.

19. He’ll hold you or stand close when you’re in the presence of other men. It’s his way of “claiming” you, and subtly suggesting that other men should be aware of this.

20. He cherishes your opinions, even if they may starkly differ from his own. He’ll want to know what you think when making choices that involve you both.

21. He holds your hand or touches your back when walking in public. This is a subtle display of his protective and reassuring nature.

22. He has big dreams and always seems to include you. Maybe he mentions moving in together, buying a home, or having a child.

23. He quickly accommodates your needs, from the most minor thing – like needing a few more minutes to get ready, to the bigger things – such as taking time off work to care for you when sick.

self care plan

24. He’s courteous and gentlemanly in everything he does with you.

25. He remembers your conversations, especially the things that you’ve said, even it took place a long time ago.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

Two Words To Never Say To Someone When They’re Stressed Out

How easy is it to get tongue-tied when suddenly approached by someone who is completely stressed out? When we’re in this frame of mind (and we all have been!), we’ll often spout some pretty aggressive language, or perhaps display our escalated frustrations by forgetting all etiquette relating to body language.

Indeed, it can be very difficult to know what to do and say in these cases. After all, there is no ‘framework’ for how to deal with stressed out people…and God forbid we say or do the wrong thing and become a newly-acquired target for their stressed-out antics!

When approached by someone in a stressed out frame of mind, it is as important (if not more) to know what not to say. Again, this can be a difficult predicament since all we want to do is help and make them feel better. Logically, we’d think that speaking some “pearls of wisdom” would make a person feel better.

Which brings us to the topic of this article: what not to say to someone that is about to blow a gasket. We’ll discuss a few techniques for listening and conversing with such a person. We’ll also discuss the TWO words never (ever!) to say to someone when they’re stressed out.

The thing to remember when you feel stressed…

The people most likely to approach you all stressed out are your friends. Not many of us desire to voice our stressors to some acquaintance or co-worker. With this in mind, it is important to consider that how we respond in this delicate situation can potentially affect the relationship moving forward.

The one thing to remember is this: the stressed person wants to vent and contemplate their feelings with you. Receiving advice is a distant second, in most cases. As such, the practice of active listening is essential.

Active listening is simply listening and conversing with someone in a mutually understandable way. One practices active listening by focusing intently when they’re speaking and – here is the hard part – not getting distracted by conversational pauses OR thinking about your response beforehand.

Using active listening in this situation is, in essence, a means of prevention – we’re preventing the escalation of an already tense situation. Further, we’re alleviating much of the pressure by not attempting to “fix” the problem. This is not to say that we won’t help in some way; but any conversational outcome with someone stressed is not the ultimate goal. In fact, it shouldn’t be considered a “goal” at all. Remember, it’s about them, not you.

In other words, a friend in a crisis doesn’t need “counseling” when they seek you out. They need a friend who’s willing to listen.

15871669_10154129688437371_262981144032811476_n

Framing the conversation

Okay, so we know that our stressed out friend will likely dominate the conversation – at least in the beginning. However, they will, at some point, expect you to interject with your thoughts.

This is when that all-important active listening will pay large dividends. When it’s your turn to speak, you already know the situation (right?) and can somewhat identify with you friend’s feelings (right?). If you can’t answer both of these questions with a definitive ‘Yes,’ then you must ask the person to reexplain. If this isn’t possible because of time constraints, elevated emotions, etc., then offer a time and place where you can focus on them, and them alone.

So here are a few tidbits when it’s your time to talk:

#1: Beware of ‘Why?’ questions

Asking ‘Why?’ about how someone is feeling can seem judgmental or condescending. The person may feel like you’re patronizing them, which is the last thing a stressed out person needs.

#2: Ask Open-ended questions

Opened-ended questions are those that cannot be answered by “yes” or “no”. Remember, they are coming to you because they want to explore their feelings. Open-ended questions allow them to do just that.

Open-ended questions accomplish three important things: (1) it shows that you’re actively listening, (2) that you care enough to inquire about their problems, and (3) allows the person to evaluate, rationalize and verbalize their (often complex) feelings.

#3: The TWO words to avoid

“Bob, you should be doing/feeling/thinking this/that/the other.” Saying ‘You should’ when somebody is emotionally vulnerable is not only selfish, it completely invalidates (and attempts to replace) their thoughts and feelings.

It’s basically saying “How you feeling/think is wrong, and you should do what I feel/think.” This is the act of a coach or a counselor, which isn’t appropriate in this scenario.

In closing…

Put simply: your stressed out friend is seeking you out for support. You saying the “right thing at the right time” is really not on their mind; if it is, then it’ an unfair expectation on their part. In fact, it’s a completely different discussion.

Be a friend, listen with attentiveness, be empathetic, be mindful of your words…and things will be fine. Both for them and for yourself.

8 Questions Women Secretly Want to Ask In A Relationship

At the beginning of a relationship, partners typically ask questions to get to know each other. Usually, conversations revolve around what you do for work, your families, and perhaps past relationships. As time goes on, you feel more comfortable with each other and start sharing things you may keep hidden from others. You might talk about past trauma or secret insecurities, for instance.

Your partner should feel like your best friend, someone you can talk to about anything without judgment. In a healthy, committed relationship, partners will have no barriers to communication and feel secure with each other.

Men and women tend to have different communication styles, with men being more direct. Women aren’t as easy to read sometimes and may withhold information until they feel ready to share.

However, after a certain amount of time in a relationship, a woman will start to have questions for her partner. Below, we’ll go over a few common questions that arise in a woman’s mind when she’s in a long-term relationship.

NOTE: We understand that men, too, have relationship questions. We address the things they hope to ask in a companion article.

8 Questions Women May Have For Their Partner

short women

1.     Where is this relationship headed?

After being together for a few months, your partner may want to know what the future holds. A woman needs to feel secure with her man, and not feel like she’s being strung along. So, she may directly ask you where you see the relationship going, and if you’re interested in taking things further.

If you don’t feel the sparks flying with her, it’s best to end things before they get too serious. After all, there’s no point in continuing a relationship that isn’t meant to last. But, if you do feel something special with her, she will want you to express these emotions somehow.

Every relationship reaches this point where you can either part ways or continue your journey together. It’s a typical question that a woman secretly wants to ask, so don’t hesitate to lay the cards on the table.

2.     Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

If you’re planning a future together, a woman will want to know about your aspirations. If you have a certain vision or goal in mind, it can impact every aspect of your life. For instance, wanting to become an actor or film director may require a move to a different state. Of course, if a woman truly loves you, she will have no issue moving to support your dreams. Questions about the future will inevitably arise in a relationship, and discussing them can help you plan ahead.

3.     What do you love most about me?

In a study on questions that generate closeness between partners, sharing positive characteristics about your SO topped the list. Especially in women who prefer words of affirmation as their love language, kind words can foster a deeper connection. The study found that asking this question early in the relationship may accelerate the bond between partners.

The ability to feel vulnerable forms the foundation of a healthy partnership, but allowing someone into your heart requires trust as well. As soon as you both feel comfortable, share a few things that you admire about each other. Most women secretly want to ask this question, as it reaffirms your feelings about her.

4.     Is there anything you want me to change?

Some women may harbor insecurities about relationships, perhaps due to partners in the past. As such, she may want to ask questions regarding weird quirks or habits you dislike about her. Maybe she genuinely wants to ensure your happiness by seeing how she can improve. Or, it could be a way to ease into a conversation about things she’d like you to change.

Either way, this question doesn’t necessarily signal a problem in the relationship. Being able to talk openly about difficult topics is actually a sign of a thriving partnership, on the contrary.

5.     What life goals do you have?

Questions about the future creep into a woman’s mind quite often in relationships. She will eventually want to know more about your dreams, not necessarily tied to a career. For instance, maybe you have longed to travel the world since childhood. She may share your passion for seeing new places and want to tag along, which means you’re on the same page. It’s important to discuss long-term goals and desires in relationships to gauge how well you mesh with each other.

6.     Do you want children?

Perhaps one of the most crucial questions to ask your partner, the topic of children can easily make or break a relationship. For example, if you want children and your partner doesn’t, that will create tension in the long term. Relationships can only last if both people want the same things in life, generally speaking. So, this question will likely come up in the early stages of a relationship to test compatibility.

7.     What does your family think about me?

A woman will usually want to ask this question to see how well she fits in with her family. Most people have close relationships with their parents and want a partner who can blend easily. When the in-laws approve of a relationship, it makes future interactions much smoother and more enjoyable. So, women naturally want to ensure they’re making a good impression with their partner’s family.

8.     Why did your past relationships end?

Women who ask these types of questions want to know how they compare to their exes. This isn’t necessarily because they feel jealous or insecure; they just wonder what makes them different. They want to know what you see in them that you didn’t find in your past relationships. Also, in the early stages of a relationship, they may ask this to understand your relationship patterns and habits.

women

Final Thoughts on Common Questions Women Ask in Relationships

As inquisitive beings, women tend to have a laundry list of questions for their partners. In fact, most people interested in a committed relationship will naturally ask questions to understand their partner better. In the beginning, many couples prefer sticking to small talk and “safe” conversational topics. However, the discussions usually become more meaningful after a couple feels comfortable with one another.

So, if your woman asks you the questions listed above, it may mean she’s interested in something more serious.

10 Signs Your Partner Is Going to Cheat

Do you think your partner is going to cheat?

Many possible life events occur for which we generally do not prepare. For instance, we do not generally expect or look for the death of a loved one, being diagnosed with cancer, falling victim to a mental illness, and so on. The simple yet complex reason for this unpreparedness is that we grow accustomed to a particular way of life. When a formidable obstruction complicates life, we search desperately for answers. We may even feel like losing hope. Hopefully, we will find the wherewithal to search for answers and a solution.

Infidelity is one of those “possible life events” that we don’t prepare for. Finding that a partner is cheating is particularly hurtful because we tend to give our all into a relationship. When you give your love, heart, and soul to another human being, you expect the same in return. You don’t expect your partner will cheat on you. A commonly-cited axiom in the medical community is, “Prevention is the best cure.” Apply this to a relationship with a potential cheater. Why suffer the consequences when they can be prevented in the first place?

Relationships can be extraordinarily complex. Combined with our quirks, precaution is a warranted measure when approaching someone who might tend to infidelity. In this piece, we present ten signs that someone has the potential to cheat on a partner. As with any behavior, it can be difficult to decipher their intentions. At the same time, the more “symptoms” present, the likelier it is that a real problem exists.

That said, here are ten signs of someone who might cheat:

“It is necessary to the happiness of man that he be mentally faithful to himself. Infidelity does not consist in believing, or in disbelieving, it consists in professing to believe what he does not believe.” – Thomas Paine, The Age of Reason

authentic love - cheat

1. Someone who might cheat is emotionally distant

This is pretty easy to observe for the victim but extraordinarily difficult to accept. Emotional detachment from someone you love is like a punch to the heart. Unfortunately, disconnection often preludes a deteriorating relationship. A potential cheat finds it easier to distance himself or herself emotionally from someone than to confront the real problem. It’s a cowardly act, in many ways.

2. Lack of sex or intimacy

When two people are in love, intimacy and sex naturally occur. A partner’s lack of interest in intimacy may be a sign of infidelity. This is especially true if no prior issues existed in this area. If nothing else, this behavior indicates some emotional or physical disconnection. A physical connection is vital in a healthy relationship. If you are facing this issue, you might want to have a serious discussion with your partner.

3. The need for “privacy.”

This is not to disregard the reality that every person in a relationship requires some “me time,” There is absolutely nothing wrong with this. However, when your “other half” constantly says things like, “I need to be alone,” “Just let me be,” or “I need some time to think,” there is almost certainly some problem.

4. A sudden defensive attitude could indicate someone could cheat

Two people in a serious relationship should understand the differences between each other’s personalities. Hopefully, you understand your partner’s flaws and accept them. It is then peculiar for a partner to suddenly become defensive regarding apparent behavior shifts. Rational dialogue is necessary for any relationship; if this becomes a problem, you might consider there’s some issue.

5. Irregular financial habits

Two people involved in a serious relationship understand the importance of monetary resources. Usually, any outgoing money is acknowledged and accounted for. If your partner drifts from this mutual understanding and engages in “splurges” for which they cannot account, it may be a sign of detachment at best – and a cheat at worst.

cheat

6. Becoming “fashion-conscious.”

We all want to look our best for various reasons, commonly to look respectable and professional. However, an abrupt change in appearance without explanation is uncommon, especially for those who have previously shown little interest in appearance. Those in a midlife crisis often cite a change in fashion as a “motivation” to look younger and more presentable. Of course, the desire to appear more attractive to the opposite sex is a real possibility.

7. They ignore your “inner circle” if they are going to cheat

One telltale sign of a cheater is a sudden disconnection from your circle of friends. This may forewarn a relationship problem. It is much easier and more convenient for a cheat to separate from those close to you than to be upfront about their true feelings. This is even more conspicuous if your partner has always been close to your social circle.

8. They guard their phone and other technology.

Nobody likes having their phone tampered with. However, meditating with your partner’s phone in a serious relationship or marriage isn’t strange. Really, it’s not that big of a deal…unless they either have something to hide or are simply in a bad mood. If your significant other suddenly object to what was not an issue previously, you may consider additional caution.

9. They’re always excessively late

Anyone in a committed relationship will tell you that a schedule is paramount to making things work. This is especially true if someone is married, has kids, or has other obligations for which they are responsible. A sudden abdication of responsible behavior is strange, particularly if that person cannot account for such conduct.

10. “Something came up at work” is an excuse when someone tends to cheat

Things happen at work. Sometimes, we’re asked to go “above and beyond” to do our jobs. Similar to many other things on this list, context is key. Something is likely amiss if your partner cannot explain the rationale behind working late. Having to work is a common and convenient excuse because it is so commonplace. That said, your partner should be able to fill you in on details regarding these work requests.

What Causes Someone to Cheat on a Partner

There are various reasons why a person may cheat on their partner, some of which include the following:

  • Lack of emotional or physical satisfaction in the current relationship
  • Opportunities or temptations outside the relationship
  • Low self-esteem or a desire for validation
  • Lack of commitment or feeling unfulfilled in the relationship
  • Boredom or seeking novelty or adventure
  • Substance abuse or addiction issues

It’s important to note that cheating is a complex issue with no single cause. Additionally, every individual and relationship is unique, and the reasons why one person cheats may be different from another.

cheat

Final Thoughts on Understanding Why a Partner Might Cheat and the Detecting the Early Signs

It hurts when one partner decides to cheat on the other. If these behaviors appear familiar or reflect your relationship, know that the cheater is responsible for his or her actions, regardless of any relationship challenges. Have a safe, open-minded conversation–with a counselor if necessary. Uncover the roots of the suspicious behaviors and seek guidance on how to move forward.

Skip to content