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Psychologist Reveals Why Everyone Should Have A Bucket List

“Bucket lists are helpful in that they’re a way of listening to your inner wisdom. It’s so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day grind, to-do lists, going to work and coming home, doing chores, and the like – you can lose sight of that inner compass.” – Dr. Shilagh Mirgain

Shilagh Mirgain is no ordinary athlete. Mirgain holds a PhD, and is an accomplished health psychologist at the University of Wisconsin (UW) School of Medicine and Public Health. According to her faculty profile on the UW website, Dr. Mirgain pursues clinical interests that span anxiety disorders; to sport psychology; to the treatment of Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS).

She’s also exceptional in another way, having climbed the highest peak in Africa – Mount Kilimanjaro. The task was mountainous (pun intended), with Dr. Mirgain rigorously preparing for the journey over four years. First, beginning with basic jaunts in simple hiking boots; to working out every day; to simulating the rigorous hike with a weighted backpack.

Dr. Mirgain’s choice to add climbing the mountain to her bucket list came from a simple postcard. People she’d met that were climbing the mountain had sent it to her, and she kept it someplace visible, vowing to one day accomplish the same.

Much easier said, than done.

Mount Kilimanjaro is indeed a massive landmark, reaching a peak of 5,895 meters (about 19,340 feet): the tallest freestanding mountain in the entire world. According to many sources, only about 40 percent of those that try ever reach the summit of the mountain. About 10 people a year die trying.

So, how did Dr. Mirgain accomplish such an extraordinary feat? Well, she had a bucket list. No joke. “I keep pictures of my bucket list items on my refrigerator. When I complete something I take that photo down and put it on another board in my home, along with a photo of myself at that place,” says Dr. Mirgain, whose own bucket list focuses heavily on travel and adventure.

So, why should you have a bucket list?

According to Dr. Mirgain, bucket lists are especially useful for keeping goals at the forefront of our mind. As we all know, it is quite easy to be overwhelmed by the heavy sense of day-to-day responsibilities and obligations. A bucket list is a way of keeping us grounded.

In other words: a bucket list is a way of connecting people with something that is greater than themselves.

Many of us have a schedule that looks very similar: work, family, eat, sleep, repeat. Dr. Mirgain insists that keeping a bucket list helps us remember what is truly important regarding our own sense of self-fulfillment.

Sufficient anecdotal evidence exists supporting the link between bucket lists and goal achievement; however, it was not until only recently that research backs up this claim, as well. Perhaps more importantly, keeping a bucket list may also translate into a more fulfilling life.

It turns out that a bucket list, similar to many other “lists,” is effective for a couple of very important reasons:

First, a bucket list helps to increase motivation – an essential attribute for the accomplishment of a goal. The correlation between goals and motivation is so strong, that many psychologists include the words “goal” and “motivation” interchangeably when defining one or the other. For instance, Terence Mitchell – a prominent behavioral psychologist and prolific author – defines motivation as: “those psychological processes that cause the arousal, direction, and persistence of voluntary actions that are goal directed.”

Second, a bucket list increases achievement. Hundreds of studies have discovered a direct link between goal setting and achievement. These studies span goal-setting and academics; goal-setting and health; goal-setting and recreation (e.g. travel); goal-setting and money management…and so forth.

So, should you create a bucket list?

Well, of course, this is completely up to you. Perhaps you really enjoy living a spontaneous life, and see no need for “listing out” you wish to do. Perhaps you are a busy person that can see the immense benefit of keeping what’s important at the forefront of your mind.

These basic observations aside, science appears to support the notion that bucket listing is an effective activity; not only for the achievement of lifetime goals, but for the ultimate experience we all wish to have: a more fulfilling life.

Related article: 25 Things You Should Do While You’re Still Young

References:
LaBianca, J. (2016, October 24). How a bucket list can make your life more meaningful | reader’s digest. Retrieved November 25, 2016, from Everyday Wellness, http://www.rd.com/health/wellness/bucket-list-benefits/
Nelson, M. (2010, February 19). Ten interesting facts about Mt. Kilimanjaro | Blog posts | WWF. Retrieved November 25, 2016, from World Wildlife Fund, http://www.worldwildlife.org/blogs/good-nature-travel/posts/ten-interesting-facts-about-mt-kilimanjaro
Turkay, S. (2014). Setting Goals: Who? Why? How? Manuscript submitted for publication, Harvard University, Cambridge Massachusetts, Cambridge. Retrieved November 25, 2016, from http://hilt.harvard.edu/files/hilt/files/settinggoals.pdf
UW School of Medicine. Shilagh A. Mirgain, PhD. (2016, November 21). Retrieved November 25, 2016, from University of Wisconsin School of Medicine and Public Health, http://www.uwhealth.org/findadoctor/profile/shilagh-a-mirgain-phd/6930
(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

25 Things Every Person Needs To Know Before Having Kids

The struggle is real. You have no idea until you have a baby in your house full time. No amount of babysitting, classes or books can really prepare you. It is a trial by poop. Lots and lots of poop. Before you dive off into the deep end, you should know some things about having kids.

25 Things Every Person Needs To Know Before Having Kids

1. Every Kid Needs Something a Little Different

Every kid needs something a little different from you. Some need attention constantly and some need to be left alone. Your kid will let you know what they need in subtle and not so subtle ways.

2. Kids Develop At Their Own Pace

Potty training, talking, eating on their own – these are all things kids do, but every kid tackles them at different stages and takes a different amount of time to develop them. Hang in there and keep trying. They will get it eventually.

3. Lighten Up

Develop a sense of humor or cultivate the one you already have. You are going to need it. A sense of humor will keep you sane.

4. Sleep Deprivation Is Real

Eight hours of uninterrupted sleep is a figment of your imagination. Sleeping in? HA! Hasta la vista baby. Take a page from the military veterans and learn to sleep when you can, anywhere you can.

tired parents

5. Kids Freak Out Over Literally Nothing

Kids will completely lose their sh*t over nothing. You didn’t do anything wrong. They just aren’t in control of their emotions.

6. Kids Push Boundaries

Tell them not to do something and they will smile and slowly do that very thing right in front of you to see what they can get away with. They will push the boundaries that you set for them. Stand firm. Kids need boundaries to keep them safe and to teach them what is and isn’t acceptable behavior.

7. Kids Want To Explore

Kids will get into everything. They are a miniature Houdini when they want to be. They want to explore and learn. Their developing brain is driving them to seek out new things. Be watchful, but indulge their learning whenever possible.

8. Buy Mac n Cheese

Buy the sh*t out of this stuff. It is like an addiction with them.

9. Keep Your Head On A Swivel

Develop your situational awareness. They will wander off or get into something when you get distracted from them. If it is quiet, then they are up to something.

10. Develop Your Patience

They are not adults and not completely in control of themselves. They will piss you off. Take a deep breath and let it go. Don’t respond to them in anger. Be firm but be in control of yourself. They will test your patience.

11. Embrace Repetition

Kids learn through repetition. They will repeat phrases, words, songs or actions. They will watch the same movie or show or listen to the same songs hundreds of times. You will have to repeat things for them until they get them.

12. Let Go Of Control

Set boundaries and then let them loose within those boundaries. Don’t try to control their every action or decision. They have their own agency. Let them figure out who they are within the limits of safety and decency.

13. Embrace Routine

Find a routine that works for you both and get used to it. Kids love routines and will flip out when those routines are changed. This is doubly true of kids with mental disabilities.

14. Don’t Manipulate With Rewards or Punishments

Bribery and threats only work for the very short term. Then, kids figure out how to work the system or get tired of the reward / punishment. Positive encouragement and known punishments for bad behavior work when applied consistently.

15. Be Mindful Of Your Words

They hear everything you say and will repeat it at the worst possible time.

16. Be Mindful Of Your Actions

They will mimic your behavior and tone. You have to lead by example.

17. You Are Not Their Buddy

If they are happy with you all of the time, then you are neglecting your duties. You are not their friend. You are their parent, and sometimes that means being the bad guy.

18. You Like Cartoons Right?

You will know every song and every line of dialogue. You will find yourself watching their shows when they are not around.

19. Manage Your Time Wisely

They have a routine and you have a job. You both have interests. You will need to find time for all of you to not only indulge your personal sports or hobbies, but also to spend time together.

20. Kids Are A Roller Coaster Ride

One minute they are happy as can be, and the next, it is the apocalypse, then back to being chipper. A kid’s emotional range is vast and they will swing back and forth. Roll with it. Enjoy the ride.

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21. Cherish The Little Moments

Amid the dirty diapers and tantrums over nothing, there will be fleeting moments of pure joy. They will be burned into your memory. Cherish them.

22. Embrace The Chaos

You cannot control the wind. All you can do is adjust the sails. Don’t try to maintain rigid control over them or your life. Be flexible and learn to bend before you break.

23. Pick Your Battles

You can guide them in the general direction you want them to go, but they will color outside the lines. If you fight them on everything, they will rebel even more. Be firm on the important things and be flexible with everything else.

24. Be Firm and Consistent

Kids like structure and boundaries, as do the rest of us. Establish the rules and boundaries in your household and then apply those rules consistently and firmly.

25. Giving Up Is Not An Option

Walking away from your responsibilities is unacceptable. You signed up for life when you had them. There is no do-over. No matter how much they succeed or screw up, you are there for them, forever. It is a lifetime commitment. You bleed for them, you sacrifice for them, you teach them, you lead them and when necessary, you carry them. They are the culmination of millions of years of work and effort. You both are but torch bearers in a much longer journey.

5 Words You Need to Remember To Make Your Relationship Last

A great relationship doesn’t just happen overnight. They are cultivated over many years and through hardships. They are born out of mutual respect and admiration. People with great relationships have them because each person in the relationship puts their partner’s well-being and happiness above their own. They take the time to learn each other’s needs and wants. They understand that they may give and receive love differently than each other. These couples respect boundaries that their partner sets out for them. They live their lives together by doing things together and spending time together. They laugh together and at each other. There are five words encapsulating what it means to have a great relationship with your partner.

If you want to have a great relationship that lasts, remember these five words:

1. Learn

You have to learn what makes your partner tick. Learn the little things they like, don’t like, hate or love. Spending a lot of time with your partner will help you learn some of these things organically through your interactions with them. You have to ask about some things and probe deeper into your relationship to uncover the hidden meaning behind some of their behaviors. If you take the time to understand your partner, you can see their side in an argument and get where they are coming from. Things they do or say don’t just come out of nowhere but are a logical progression from their personal history, thoughts, emotions, and beliefs.

2. Lines

Every person and every relationship has boundaries or lines that you do not cross. Learning where these lines are and why they are there is critical to a long-term relationship. Couples who have great relationships know where their partner’s lines are and respect them by not crossing them. Respecting each other’s boundaries is an extension of your love and respect for your partner.

3. Live

Live your lives together. Great couples have great relationships because they are really choosing to live their lives together, hand in hand. This sounds kind of obvious but some people are so wrapped up in their own profession, business, family and hobbies that they spend more time away from their partner than with them. People have great relationships because there is nothing that they would rather do and no one they would rather be with than their partner. They do things together, they engage in conversations more substantial than small talk and the routine “how was your day?” People need time to do their own thing and that is not only understandable but to be encouraged. People who have great relationships always return to their partner, though, because they truly enjoy each others company.

4. Laugh

Laughter is the best medicine and being able to make your partner laugh is a key ingredient to a great relationship. Couples who are happy laugh together. Whether the cause is a silly inside joke or a witty observation about something serious, it doesn’t matter. Getting your partner to laugh when they are in a crappy mood or had a rough day can burn away stress that otherwise might accumulate to unbearable levels. Couples in great relationships are also very good at laughing at themselves. They don’t take themselves or each other too seriously. Also, they don’t hold onto old hurts or get bent out of shape over little things. They let them go and laugh them off.

relationship

5. Love

Everyone gives and receives love differently. People who have great relationships understand this and seek to give their partner the type of love they need from them. They also understand that they are different and that what works for one person probably doesn’t work for the other. They learn how to love each other in a way that makes the other person in the relationship happiest. Additionally, they are dedicated to loving each other even when they don’t like each other very much. Couples are going to piss each other off at some point or fight about something important. It happens to everyone. What sets the great relationship apart is that both people understand and forgive each other and love them even when they disagree.

References:

5 Simple but Often Forgotten Ways to Keep a Relationship Strong


http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/5-foundations-every-successful-relationship-needs.html

Text(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

8 Hidden Behaviors Of A Bully

Bullying is as old as humanity and rises from a single primordial source: fear. Fear is a common emotion for everyone and everyone deals with their own fear in different ways. Some ways are healthy and rational and some are destructive and harmful. A bully, at heart, is afraid. They are insecure in their feelings about themselves and so they fight that fear by causing fear in others. Anyone has the capacity to be a bully if they are fearful enough.

It is easy enough to spot a bully if you are the victim, but it is much harder to tell if you are the one doing the bullying.

Here are 8 hidden behaviors of a bully (and how to avoid having them):

Do you see these red flags that might reveal a bully?

bully behaviors

1. A Need To Control And Dominate Others

People are afraid they aren’t good enough, strong enough, smart enough or powerful enough, and so they feel the need to prove to everyone, especially themselves, that they are. They seek to control everything and everyone because they feel that their lives are out of control, or they feel that someone can hurt them if they don’t have complete control of a situation. They seek to dominate others in order to make sure that no one can rise up and hurt them.

The best way to deal with this is to confront your own inner fears about your self-worth. Confront the individuals in your life that made you feel unworthy or insufficient. Identify your control issues and find the underlying reason you feel the need to control everything and everyone around you.

2. Quick To Anger

Part of a bully’s fear of being out of control is that their own emotions are not completely in their control. They may be emotionally unbalanced or under a lot of emotional strain and lash out more frequently because of this.

In order to deal with this, you need to find the underlying cause of your anger and deal with that. Anger management classes and finding other ways to deal with powerful emotions can help control those emotions better.

3. Poor Impulse Control

Anger and fear can override our better judgment and eliminate obstacles to acting on those emotions. People with poor impulse control struggle to control just about every emotion. There are fewer mental breakwaters to drain the power out of a tsunami of emotions. When a powerful emotion like fear or anger rises up, there is very little within a bully’s mind to slow it down and prevent them from acting on that emotion.

Confronting the fears themselves will help with this as will attending anger management classes. Being able to recognize when you are getting dangerously angry and then leaving that encounter before things get out of hand is also a good skill to learn. Preventing incidents is much better than dealing with the aftermath.

4. Lack of Empathy For Others

Dehumanizing someone makes it much easier to inflict mental or physical violence on someone. When a person you are dealing with ceases to be a person and instead become merely an obstacle to your will, then you are dehumanizing them. When you mentally categorize that person by their job instead of by their name, then you are dehumanizing them. It is easier to cuss out the customer service representative than Sally who has two kids and works two other jobs to make ends meet since her husband got sick with cancer.

You can stop a situation from escalating by recognizing that the obstacle in front of you is a person with their own issues they are dealing with. Try to understand that they may be having a crappy day just like you. When you can connect to another person’s situation, then you are less likely to mistreat them.

5. Intolerant of Differences

People are social creatures and it is easy to identify with a group. It is an instinct to sort ourselves out into “tribes” and anyone who isn’t one of “us” is a threat. Religious, political, economic and social groups can easily dehumanize and demonize members of opposing groups because they are part of another “tribe.” This stems from fear of the other and from anger at perceived grievances between groups. Social media has taken this to the extreme with “manufactured outrage” whereby you stir up the emotions of one group against another group in order to make money.

When you accept those that are different than you and understand that everyone sees the same things from different points of view, then you can try to find common ground and meet in the middle. Instead of jumping to conclusions about someone’s opinions or beliefs, try to understand why they believe those things in the first place.

bully behaviors

6. Does Not Accept Responsibility For Their Actions

Serial bullies refuse to accept the responsibility for their violence and instead will shift blame to someone or something else. They don’t see their bullying as their fault. That’s because they are reactive rather than proactive. They are reacting out of fear and anger at someone else’s misconduct. They see themselves as the victim or the hero. Most compelling villains see themselves as the hero of their own story. They aren’t responsible for their outrageous actions because they were just protecting something else like national sovereignty, religious orthodoxy or racial purity.

Regardless of the situation, you are responsible for your own actions. You choose to act or not to act by your own volition. You can choose to be gracious and understanding. Finally, you can choose to educate the other person in a rational and reasonable manner. If you threaten violence or use violence in order to get your way, then you need to accept responsibility for that action because you could have chosen differently.

7. Feelings of Superiority

Bullies often feel superior and use that feeling to dehumanize others as mere inferiors. Bullies can feel economically, socially, racially or physically superior. They use that feeling to justify their actions. When they feel that they are better than you, it gives them the justification they need to treat you like crap.

Once you realize that no one is intrinsically superior to anyone else, you can empathize with them. Everyone has something that they are good at, even though everything is not compensated equally well. You might be the most successful investment banker in the world, but without mechanics, computer techs, or carpenters, then you would have no way to get to work, nothing to work on when you got there and nowhere to live. Everyone has something special to offer the world.

8. Blame The Victim

Because bullies find it hard to accept responsibility for their actions, they often blame the victim instead. “He/She made me do it,” is a common excuse. You are either in control of your actions or you are not. No amount of hateful words or physical violence is ever justified against a peaceful person or group.

If you find yourself blaming another person or group for your violence or abusive words, then you might be a bully. Accept responsibility for your actions and your words. Using violence or intimidation to rob someone of their property, self-worth or rights is always wrong. You can choose a different path. It is your choice whether or not to victimize someone else. Learn to get what you want without violence and intimidation. Choose a better path.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

6 Foods That Cause Inflammation In Your Body

The food choices you make influence how much inflammation you have in your body. One high-fat meal will trigger a release of specific molecules that set off an inflammatory response. Having too much inflammation in your body can lead to dangerous illnesses. It’s worth knowing which foods to avoid so you can decrease your levels of inflammation. Here are the six most common foods that trigger inflammation, leading to severe disease.

The Connection Between Inflammation and Disease

Doctors warn that inflammation is a common factor in diabetes, certain cancers, and cardiovascular disease. These diseases account for approximately 70% of all deaths in the United States every year. Other conditions that may stem from inflammation include these:

  • Arthritis
  • Crohn’s disease
  • Colitis
  • IBS
  • Asthma
  • Alzheimer’s disease
  • Parkinson’s disease

6 Foods That Cause Inflammation

Here are six foods to avoid if you have inflammatory diseases or conditions.

inflammation

1 – Refined carbohydrates

A group of researchers at Harvard found that people who ate a diet high in sugary drinks, processed meats, and refined carbohydrates were 38% more likely to end up with heart disease than people who didn’t eat these foods. Refined carbohydrates are grains that have the bran and fiber removed. These refined carbohydrates raise your blood sugar levels after you eat them. Several hours later, you end up with a blood sugar crash that makes you feel hungry and craving the foods again. Refined carbohydrates include these everyday pantry staples:

  • White bread
  • White rice
  • Pasta
  • Sugary cereals
  • Pastries
  • Sweet desserts
  • Crackers
  • Rolls

2 – Sugar

Inflammation isn’t a new medical concept. 2,000 years ago, Roman doctors noticed that they got warm to the touch, painful, and swollen as wounds healed. The word Inflammare Latin for “to set on fire,” became the word doctors used to describe this phenomenon. Only centuries later, the medical community understood the cause of inflammation-your body’s immune system fighting off threatening germs and toxins. This is the good side of inflammation, but inflammation also has a harmful side.

Glucose, a type of sugar, can lead to an inflammatory response. A diet high in sugary drinks, baked goods, or candy sets you up to have daily inflammation. Over time, this constant inflammation leads to chronic inflammation, which leads to diseases and even conditions like depression. Foods that contain a lot of sugar include the following:

  • Soft drinks
  • Fruit juices
  • Punch
  • Desserts
  • Pastries
  • Candies
  • Snacks

When you read food labels, be aware that some ingredients are the sugar in disguise. If you see these ingredients on a brand, they are sugar.

  • Corn syrup
  • Dextrose
  • Fructose
  • Golden syrup
  • Maltose
  • Sorghum syrup
  • Sucrose

3 – Saturated Fats and Trans-fats

It does not a surprise that foods that lead to inflammation are unhealthy. Foods high in unhealthy fats and trans-fats cause you to gain weight, which puts you at risk of inflammation. Foods like

  • Deep-fried foods
  • Fast foods
  • Commercially baked foods, especially hydrogenated oil, margarine, or vegetable shortening.
  • Bread
  • Granola bars
  • Salad dressings

The food manufacturers know consumers don’t want to buy foods with trans-fats, so they use different names on the labels. Regulations allow food companies to hide ½ gram of trans fat per serving. Typically, you end up eating a lot more than 1 gram of trans fat, which is the recommended amount per day for adults.

Even foods containing zero grams of trans fats contain unhealthy fats. They use different names for these fats, such as

  • Hydrogenated oils
  • Partially hydrogenated oils

4 – Food Additives

When you consume food with food additives, it changes the microbes in your stomach, causing intestinal problems and inflammation. They used food additives in processed foods to thicken, add texture, or increase the shelf life. Processed foods lack fiber, minerals, and vitamins. They’re usually high in sugar, fat, and calories. Today there are more regulations for using food additives than in the past. However, scientists must still conduct more studies to better understand food additives’ long-term effects.

Unhealthy food additives include those on the following list:

  • Partially hydrogenated vegetable oil
  • Hydrogenated oils
  • Aspartame-found in Equal and NutraSweet
  • Sodium nitrate
  • Stevia
  • Sulfites
  • Artificial colors
  • Saccharin
  • Olestra

5 – Red and Processed Meats

Overeating red meat will trigger an inflammatory response over time. This outcome puts you at risk for heart disease and cancer. Red meats include these:

  • Beef
  • Lamb
  • Pork

They processed certain types of meat using smoke, salt, curing, or chemicals. They have linked processed meats to inflammation-causing diseases like colon and rectum, esophagus, and lung cancer. Meats that are processed include the following:

  • Ham
  • Sausage
  • Salami
  • Pepperoni

So limit the amount of red meat you eat. Replace it with fish, poultry, or vegetables. When you consume red meat, choose grass-fed meat if possible.

inflammation

6 – Alcohol

High alcohol consumption causes inflammation of your esophagus, larynx, and your liver. Chronic inflammation can lead to cancer in these areas of your body. Alcohol also puts a burden on your liver, so it can’t function thoroughly. Examples of drinks that can increase your inflammation include these things:

  • Beer
  • Liquors
  • Wines
  • Liqueurs
  • Ciders

Doctors suggest that you drink moderately to reduce your risk of alcohol-related inflammation and other problems. The 2020-2025 CDC guidelines for men, the recommended amount is two drinks of alcohol or less per day, and for women, the recommended amount is one drink of alcohol or less per day.

What Foods Can Fight Inflammation?

The best way to fight inflammation isn’t taking a pill but eating anti-inflammatory foods. These foods help fight free radicals that interfere with your body’s proper function. Here are some of the best foods you can eat to fight inflammation in your body.

  • High-fiber foods-Fresh fruits, fresh vegetables, legumes, and whole grains
  • Omega3 fatty acids-Salmon, mackerel, sardines, tuna, flaxseed oil, walnuts, flaxseeds, leafy greens
  • Unsaturated fats-almonds, pecans, walnuts, pumpkin, and flaxseeds. Sesame and plant oils.
  • Polyphenols-These are plant chemicals in dark chocolate, berries, apples, citrus, onions, tea, or seeds.

How Do You Start to Eat to Fight Inflammation?

You may not want to start a completely new lifestyle eating plan all at once. It’s best to make changes slowly. Otherwise, you’ll feel deprived of the foods you love. When you’re at the store, hang out in the fresh produce aisle longer than you usually do. Look around and see if there’s produce you’ve never noticed. Try something new from the produce aisle like kale, fresh mango, or fresh red beets. Take it home and research how to prepare your newfound fruit or veggie. You may find that you love the taste.

Buy whole-wheat spaghetti pasta and brown rice instead of white. Avoid sugary snacks. Try getting your sweet tooth fixed by eating frozen mixed berries or a little dark chocolate. Skip your everyday processed food. Substitute things like

  • Instant mashed potatoes: Make real potatoes. They are super easy!
  • Salad dressing: Make your oil and vinegar.
  • Flavored popcorn: Make your popcorn with a particular popcorn maker that goes in your microwave. When you pull your popcorn out of the microwave, drizzle it with olive oil and a little salt or spices.
  • Tomato pasta sauce-Store bought tomato pasta sauce has lots of sugar. Instead of buying that, make your own. It’s easy. Chop up tomatoes. Saute them for a few minutes in a skillet with fresh garlic and basil. Drizzle your pasta with olive oil and top with your homemade pasta sauce.
  • Pita chips-Make your own by cutting a pita into fourths. Lay them on a baking sheet, then spray with olive oil. Bake in an oven 350 degrees Fahrenheit for 15 minutes or until desired crispiness.

Start Fighting Inflammation One Meal at a Time

  • Try to think about each meal instead of an entire day of eating. For instance, you can eat with berries and walnuts, coffee, or tea for a leisurely breakfast.
  • Lunch: Open-faced sandwich of mashed avocado on a slice of whole-wheat bread. Sprinkle with olive oil, chopped tomatoes, salt, and pepper.
  • Dinner: Make grilled salmon sprinkled with olive oil, lemon, and pepper. Add brown rice and a leafy green salad. For dessert, try a wedge of dark chocolate or some inflammation-fighting berries like strawberries, blueberries, and raspberries.

Every little healthy choice you make adds to less inflammation and risk of health problems in the future. If you’re unsure what healthy foods to eat or avoid, you can follow the Mediterranean Diet. One of the most nutritious lifestyle diets emphasizes eating lots of plants, lean like poultry, whole grains, and olive oil.

inflammation

Final Thoughts on Eating to Beat Inflammation

Your food choices make a massive difference in the amount of inflammation you have in your body. They link a lifestyle of unhealthy inflammation to disease and health problems. Avoiding these foods can reduce your inflammation and help you feel better. If you avoid these six common foods that trigger inflammation and begin eating more anti-inflammatory foods, you’ll be on the road to better health today and tomorrow.

10 Things A Highly Sensitive Person Should Never Have To Deal With

The physical and emotional senses of a highly sensitive person are far more heightened than the average person. Office lighting that is perfectly normal for the average person may induce a migraine in very sensitive people. The light is that much brighter to them. Sounds are that much louder. Colors are more vibrant, and emotions are an avalanche that cannot be stopped or delayed.

They are typically hyper-aware of the things in their environment, and small things most people would tune out or not even notice will drive a sensitive person completely nuts. They live in a much “louder” world than the rest of the population.

What Does the Term Highly Sensitive Person Mean, Precisely?

highly sensitive people

Dr. Elaine Aron, an acclaimed psychotherapist, coined the term highly sensitive person (HSP) in 1991.

Dr. Aron realized that about fifteen to twenty percent of people displayed a unique personality trait. She called this trait “sensory-processing sensitivity,” or SPS.

She observed that people with SPS reacted to both internal and external stimuli more strongly than those with a lower threshold. Situations that impacted this population keenly included loud noises, bright lights, learning of sad news, and dealing with physical pain.

The HSP lives life with an amplified perspective of everything happening in the world around them. Things that many people don’t see as problematic, like crowded stores or the blaring of sirens in traffic, become intolerable for the HSP.

Being HSP Is a Precious Gift

While that explanation makes it sound like a curse, the highly sensitive person adjusts and learns how to turn this personality trait into a gift.

Dr. Aron noticed that the HSP is likely to display the following abilities:

  • Heightened creativity
  • Greater appreciation for Mother Nature
  • The ability to recognize distress or pain in others
  • More empathy for others
  • An innate sense of kindness
  • Deeper personal relationships

Are You a Highly Sensitive Person?

If the traits above sound like what you experience, perhaps you are a highly sensitive person. This personality type might explain why you feel depleted during a party when the loud music and large crowd charge everyone else up. Or, it explains why the coffee commercial where the service member surprises his family by coming home for a holiday makes you cry tears of joy.

Dr. Aron developed this special assessment tool to help you evaluate whether or not you display the traits that indicate HSP.

Here are ten things that sensitive people shouldn’t have to deal with.

Every HSP should avoid these situations whenever possible.

1. Holding Back

The HSP finds it nearly impossible to hold back their feelings. Doing so makes them feel tormented; they have to let them out.

Their emotions are a giant ocean wave. You cannot stop it. All they can do is ride it out and try to stay on the surface. They feel more deeply and more powerfully than the average person. Highly sensitive people wear their hearts on their sleeves. They learn early that it is pointless and suppress their emotions, so they give into them and let them all out.

2. Watching Horror Movies

They cannot fathom why anyone would delight in another person’s pain and torture, even a fictitious one on a movie screen. Even the fake Hollywood re-enactment of a scene of murder or torture is unbelievably twisted and perverse to them.

They cannot help but ask, “What kind of person feels good after a horror movie?”

The HSP experiences difficulty with processing this kind of fear and overstimulation. They find the images disturbing for hours after viewing the program.

3. Criticism

Most people may see constructive criticism as a way to improve a skill or job performance. But to a sensitive person, it feels like an attack on their very person.

To them, the feedback does not show that they need to improve in that particular area but that they are personally flawed. Because they feel the sting of criticism more keenly than the average person, they will find ways to avoid criticism.

While the HSP realizes that accepting constructive criticism is a natural part of life, they cannot help but take it very personally. This struggle is one the HSP will have to work on throughout life.

4. Hesitation to Make Decision

Overthinking goes hand-in-hand with the decision-making process for a highly sensitive person.

They tend to consider everyone when making a decision and can overanalyze a problem into oblivion.

They find it difficult to make a hasty decision because they need to account for all of the variables. If they make a decision, even the right one, but end up hurting someone’s feelings in the process, they could find it more difficult to make a decision in the future.

They will second guess themselves because they will feel that any decision could wind up adversely affecting someone else.

pop meme5. Tattoos

Sensations, whether physical or emotional, are heightened in a sensitive person.

Thus, most HSPs feel physical pain acutely. They find medical procedures or even suffering minor injuries extremely stressful.

They cannot understand why anyone would voluntarily cause themselves pain for hours, even for a pretty picture on their skin. Being jabbed with a needle at the doctor’s office is bad enough. But to be jabbed a few hundred times a minute is unthinkable for most highly sensitive people.

6. Displays of Rude Behavior

Because they are sensitive to the feelings of others, they cannot understand how people can be so thoughtless and rude to others. They are very polite and have an innate sense of what is kind and fair.

Therefore, boorish people might as well be an alien species to them. It doesn’t make sense to them how someone can be so oblivious to other people’s feelings.

One Quora user, a highly sensitive person, explains that she cannot tolerate any rudeness, so she removes herself from the situation altogether.

Here is what she said:

“If they become offensive, then walk away. Just say, ‘Excuse me,’ turn around, and walk away. They may yell at you but you don’t have to respond.”

That advice seems like a perfect way to break away from a rude person without adding to the drama.

7. Group Exercise or Sports

Sensitive people tend to avoid group exercise or sports because they feel like everyone is watching them and waiting for them to screw up.

They tend to like bicycling, running, hiking, and other solo activities to ones where they compete on a team with many other people.

8. Activities that involve a crowd

Going to a club or concert with loud music and flashing lights is too much stimulation for a sensitive person. Imagine cranking up the volume to twice that and having the lights twice as bright. It would give you a headache really fast. This is how a sensitive person feels when there is too much sensory stimulation.

It is physically painful to them, so they seek out quiet and dimly lit places like bookstores and coffee shops.

Your HSP friends love being social just like you do. But they prefer tamer interactions that foster good conversation and personal connection.

Remember, the HSP uniquely processes this stimulating environment, and that energy level will fatigue them quickly.

9. Annoying Sounds

You may not notice your tapping feet or frenzied pen clicking. But the sensitive person is over there, silently cringing and wishing you would just stop. Just stop already!

Repetitive and loud noises drive sensitive people up the wall. You may not notice it, but they certainly do.

10. Open Office Plans

Sensitive people prefer to work in environments where they can control how much stimulation they receive.

They prefer to work at home or in a place that has buffers to outside stimuli. An open office with rows of cubicles–or worse yet–where there is no buffer or privacy makes it hard for someone who is hyper-aware of their surroundings to concentrate.

highly sensitive personFinal Thoughts on the Ten Things a Highly Sensitive Person Should Never Have to Deal With

Understanding that you are a highly sensitive person can alter your life. All of a sudden, you realize why you get overwhelmed so easily. It explains why you’d rather meet friends for a hot cup of coffee and a chat instead of a night out on the town.

You also know that your unique viewpoint means that you have special gifts that allow you to appreciate the most beautiful parts of life.

Finally, HSP’s realization also helps you find ways to adjust your lifestyle to suit your personality traits.  It would be best if you start by avoiding these ten things that can make a highly sensitive person feel exhausted, depleted, or even cranky.

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