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6 Behaviors of Socially Awkward People (And How To Avoid Them)

Tripping over your words, feeling anxious, and struggling to find the right words to say are common behaviors of socially awkward people. Lacking social skills can be overcome with some courage and practice, as well as some positive thoughts about your ability to be a conversational genius.

Humans are social beings. Much of what we need to survive we get by relying on others. Our ability to communicate well with others in social settings is important to our total well-being.

There are some traits of social awkwardness which, when taken to more severe levels, are the traits of adults with low-support autism or Asperger’s syndrome. Researchers created an Awkward Moments Test, which is a series of video clips of characters experiencing socially uncomfortable moments. The researchers then ask people to watch the videos and describe the emotional state of the person in the video.

Human communication includes many subtle styles that can be hard to detect. Pretending, being ironic, joking, telling a white lie, using a figure of speech, or persuading someone are all situations where we might misunderstand what is being said and have a socially awkward situation.

Let’s look at 6 behaviors of socially awkward people and how to avoid them so you can stop avoiding social situations.

6 Behaviors of Socially Awkward People (and how to avoid them)

socially awkward

1. Getting anxious around other people

Fear of judgment, fear of crowds, fear of saying the wrong thing. As a matter of fact, fear is one thing that can keep people away from situations where they have to interact with others. Fear is a feeling in your body that something isn’t right. The good news is that you can talk yourself out of it.

Feeling a moment of fear is a way for your social awkwardness to help you recognize that you need to take action. Associate professor of psychology, Joshua Clegg says that social awkwardness is like an early warning system. For example, you feel the moment of awkwardness when someone tells an insulting joke. Use the feeling to act by excusing yourself to go refresh a drink.

2. Missing non-verbal social cues

Missing the cues that tell us when someone is no longer interested in talking can be one thing that makes your social encounters awkward. Look for the following signs that your conversation is over.

Non-verbal cues that someone is finished speaking or ready to move on to a new topic:

  • Feet pointed away from you
  • Torso or head pointed away from you
  • Starts doing another activity
  • No longer making eye contact
  • Fidgeting
  • Moving further away

Look for the non-verbal cues that someone is ready to end a conversation and let them exit gracefully. Say ‘Did you need to get going?’ or ‘Well (name) it was great to see you again’ to start wrapping up the conversation in a pleasant way.

Related article: 7 Ways To Respond To Verbally Aggressive People

Verbal cues that someone is finished speaking or ready to move on to a new topic:

  • Changing the topic
  • No longer asking questions
  • Speaking only in short phrases like ‘Um hmm’ or ‘Yes/No’

When you catch on to these verbal cues, wrap up your own speaking and ask the other person a question.

3. Talking too much or too little

A good conversation has a flow of giving and take, talking and listening. Socially awkward people can tend to talk so much that they monopolize the conversation. If this is your awkward conversational style, try to slow your rate of speaking and limit yourself to 4 sentences, then pause to let your partner speak.

Sometimes though, they aren’t sure what to say, so they stand there quietly, wondering if, or when, they should speak. When you aren’t sure what to say, try small talk. Small talk is the art of talking about nothing much really.

Small talk topics can include the weather, your outfit, TV shows, good restaurants to try, etc. Basically these are everyday things that we can discuss that do not usually arouse negative emotions in people.

4. Talking about awkward or touchy subjects

Most people know that talking about politics, sex, or religion are very sensitive subjects. Socially awkward people may have missed the lesson on this because they tend to be the ones to make you cringe when they bring up controversial topics in conversation.

Related article: 5 Little Things That Will Improve Your Relationship

Topics that people feel passionately about should be avoided rather than bringing up feelings of anger when one person’s view is different than another person’s.

Avoid talking about touchy subjects, but take your cue from the person you are speaking with. If they bring up a sensitive topic, try saying ‘Well we might be getting into a sensitive area here but if you’d like to know my opinion I will tell you.’

5. Being too honest

Mastering the social graces usually requires some small form of lying, or at least withholding what you really feel about someone. We call these white lies. In other words, you should not tell a person that you really hate the clothes they are wearing.

Social norms are the rules that most people agree define what is acceptable behavior for people in groups. Generally speaking, interrupting and insulting others are two behaviors that we know are frowned upon, so avoiding these behaviors will help you be less socially awkward.

6. Being unable to detect or express emotions

Your friends may think you are socially awkward when you are unable to express empathy after they describe a significant loss that affected them. The same is true if you are unable to express joy for them when they are happy about a promotion or some other joyful event.

Similarly, not being able to detect emotional signals from the body language or facial expressions of another person is connected to more frequent incidents of social awkwardness.

(C) Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

How To Make A Relationship Last 25 Years And Longer

In life, we often forget that the simple, little things in relationships truly matter the most. Life already includes enough stress and complications, so your relationship with your partner should provide you with comfort and peace. Of course, you will inevitably encounter some problems in relationships, but you can make it through anything by keeping the following small details in mind.

Using our advice about relationships, these rules can help you to stay focused on what truly matters in a relationship – unconditional love, compassion, understanding, support, gratitude, and commitment.

How To Make A Relationship Last 25 Years and Longer

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Related article: 6 Things That Happen When You Fall In Love
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6 Ways To Turn Off Your Weight Gain Hormones

Seven different hormones can cause weight gain. Once you understand how they work in your body, you can turn off their power to make you overweight.

We gain weight often can seem to be due to what is happening in our lives that cause us stress. Sometimes, even though we watch what we eat and exercise, we feel like our weight gain is out of control.

Let’s look further at how you can work with your body to turn off your weight gain hormones and have the body you desire.

6 Ways to Turn Off Your Weight Gain Hormones

Here are proactive steps you can take to jumpstart weight loss.

1. Eat plenty of protein to balance your hormones

Ghrelin is made in the digestive system, and it is called the hunger hormone because it increases your appetite when your body needs the energy to use. Being able to suppress ghrelin’s effects would help us turn off this weight gain hormone.

Research published in the American Diabetes Association found that ‘Ghrelin administration stimulates GH secretion and causes weight gain by increasing food intake and reducing fat utilization in rodents.’

The researchers looked at lean and obese people’s levels of this weight hormone. They found that ghrelin was found in lower concentrations in obese people than thin people.

To turn off your ghrelin hormone so you won’t gain weight, eat a diet high in protein and avoid high-fat foods. Protein helps suppress ghrelin production in the digestive system to keep you from eating more and gaining weight.

2. Remove sugar from your diet

Sugar is sneaky because it shows up in many forms in many foods. Getting rid of it entirely can be a challenge in label reading. However, it may be the best thing you can do to turn off your weight gain hormone insulin.

Insulin is most closely associated with diabetes, which affects millions of people worldwide. The pancreas produces insulin to help digest sugars that you eat. High insulin levels in your blood can affect your likelihood of weight gain.

Insulin helps glucose to be absorbed by the cells and stored as energy, which is why you can gain weight when you have more sugar in your diet. Storing energy in fat cells is not what you need to turn off weight gain.

3. Eat less dairy (hormone free dairy might not do the trick)

Hormone-free dairy products aren’t necessarily a safe means of avoiding extra hormones that cause weight gain.

The dairy industry has responded to public pressure to provide hormone-free dairy products to consumers. Research shows that eating animal hormones may trigger early development in teenage girls and boys.

Nutritional and medical experts have realized that the milk that cows and other animals provide is meant to grow and raise their own young, not humans. Avoid these non-human hormones that can mess with your own.

4. Avoid soy products that can cause imbalanced hormones

Women undergoing menopause experience a natural decrease in the estrogen that their body produces now that they can no longer bear children. As a result of the decreased estrogen, body fat increases. Soy products contain phytoestrogen, which can block the normal human estrogen in the body.

Estrogen has a role in the production of leptin. Leptin is one of the most important hormones to reduce weight gain because it regulates satiety. Satiety is how satisfied we feel when we eat. If we don’t feel satisfied or sated, we will continue to eat, even if we don’t need to eat.

Researchers studying the role that estrogen has on leptin levels found that ‘In humans, serum leptin concentration was higher in premenopausal women than in men, and in postmenopausal women, it was lower than in premenopausal women but still higher than in men.’

The same researchers found that in premenopausal women, serum leptin levels were significantly higher in the luteal phase or the later part of their menstrual cycles.

This research suggests that increasing estrogen levels through dietary changes could help increase leptin production, which can help turn off weight gain.

5. Improve hormone health by reducing stress and caffeine intake

The stress hormone cortisol is released when frustrated, overwhelmed, or feeling stuck. Stress eating is natural, and people who binge, especially on so-called ‘comfort foods,’ are likely to engage in a destructive behavior pattern that will lead to weight gain.

Rather than allowing your stress to dictate when you eat, seek to reduce sources of stress in your life to reduce cortisol levels in your body.

If work is overwhelming, delegate parts that someone else can handle. If your home life is stressful, sit outside in nature for 5 minutes while breathing deeply to relax and recharge.

Caffeine levels can also increase the level of cortisol that releases into your body. Turn off the weight gain by reducing your caffeine intake, and the hormone cortisol will be reduced as well.

6. Eliminate grains

Grain consumption links to thyroid hormone production that slows down. Reducing your intake of grains in your diet can help regulate your thyroid hormone levels and turn off weight gain.

The thyroid is one of the most important factors to consider when examining weight gain. Check with your medical professional to have your thyroid levels checked if you suspect that a low-functioning thyroid gland causes your weight gain.

Nine Other Lifestyle Changes To Help Regulate Hormones

What can you do for better hormone health besides changing your nutrition? Try these things.

1. Regular meal times

Eating your calories in smaller, more frequent meals helps regulate your body’s glucose levels that affect the secretion of insulin and cortisol. These hormones stabilize your appetite, so you don’t overeat. Staying in tune with your body and eating when you’re hungry gives your body a break. It relieves your digestion hormones, so they don’t get overworked, leading to weight gain. Create good eating habits, such as:

  • Sit down at the table to eat-Avoid walking around or eating in your car.
  • Chew slowly-Take appropriate bites and chew your food slowly. Enjoy the experience of eating.
  • Schedule your meals-Try to eat at the same time every day.
  • Be mindful of flavors-Enjoy the flavor and texture of your food.
  • Don’t add condiments until you taste the food-Taste your food before adding salt or other seasonings.

2. Exercise helps boost hormones

Exercise regulates adrenaline and cortisol, two stress hormones. It also helps stimulate the production of endorphins, peptide hormones that relieve pain and give you a feeling of general well-being.

3. Get enough sleep

Not getting enough sleep upsets your hormones levels. Lack of sleep releases stress hormones causing you to overeat, increasing your blood pressure, and making you feel exhausted.

4. Reduce your stress

When you’re stressed, your body releases adrenaline and cortisol into your bloodstream. These fight-or-flight hormones speed up your heart rate and increase your blood pressure. Living with constant stress upsets the balance of these hormones causing

  • Anxiety
  • Weight gain
  • Depression
  • Loss of focus
  • Decreased immunity
  • Auto-immune disorders

5. Stop smoking

You know the fact. Smoking isn’t healthy. Not only does it cause cancer and other diseases, but smoking upsets your body’s estrogen and testosterone levels. This imbalance can decrease fertility in women.

6. Stay hydrated

When dehydrated, toxins aren’t properly filtered out of your body. This puts stress on your body and throws off your hormonal balance. Drinking plenty of water helps your body deliver hormones via your bloodstream to your organs. This flushes out the toxins in your body and keeps your cells working properly.

7. Avoid certain foods

Skip sugary or processed foods. These foods are full of useless calories that affect the production and secretion of hormones in your gut and nervous system. Processed and fast foods have a lot of salt, fat, and sugar. Research shows that eating these foods can

  • Shorten your life
  • Age your body quicker
  • Put your brain at risk
  • Cause you to gain weight

8. Getting enough light exposure

Exposure to light affects your hormones. Getting enough light helps your body regulate the circadian rhythm function, which allows your sleep and waking cycles. Being exposed to sunlight helps you sleep better at night. You wake up with more energy since you’re well-rested. Being exposed to blue light from your electronics, especially at night, can suppress natural melatonin secretion, so you can’t sleep.

9. Makeup (surprisingly) can impact hormones

Did you know that some makeup contains harmful substances that affect your estrogen levels? These hormone disruptors, Xenoestrogens, block estrogen production, so they can’t work as they should. Chemicals called phthalates also disrupt your hormones. These are in hairsprays, nail polish, and hair straighteners.

(C) Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

6 Things That Happen When You Fall In Love

People say that love is a drug, and your body might agree when you understand what happens to your body when you fall in love. There are a lot of physiological changes in your mind and body that are normal for someone who is falling in love, but it can feel like you are going through puberty again with all of the chemical and hormonal changes that your body is experiencing.

This Is What Happens When You Fall In Love

You release pheromones

Pheromones are chemicals that have a faintly detectable scent. As a person falling in love, you often feel sexually attracted before you feel true, deep love. That initial spark of attraction is likely due to your inhalation of your partner’s pheromones.

Related article: 5 Things That Make A Woman Beautiful (Besides Her Looks)

Adrenaline

When you fall in love, your body releases a spike in adrenaline. The adrenaline rush gives you that feeling of butterflies in your stomach. This is a similar feeling you get when something ‘just doesn’t feel right.’ That gut feeling is a way for your body to tell you to pay close attention because something important is happening.

Related article: 5 Ways to Strengthen Your Gut Instinct

Obviously, falling in love and getting a gut instinct that something is wrong are very different emotionally. One is a happy emotion and the other one is a fear response. The tingling in your belly is a way for your body to tell you that something is about to change your life, either for the good or the bad.

Hormone level changes

Researchers studied the hormone levels of people who had fallen in love within the last 6 months and compared them to the hormones of people in long-term relationships or those who were single. They found ‘Cortisol levels were significantly higher amongst those subjects who had recently fallen in love, as compared with those who had not. FSH [follicle-stimulating hormone] and testosterone levels were lower in men in love, while women of the same group presented higher testosterone levels.’

The scientists explain that the research on the biological chemistry of falling in love is limited, and that they are unsure why the reverse levels of testosterone happen for men and women falling in love.

You increase serotonin

Your body and your brain undergo chemical changes that cement the new bond of love that you are forming with your partner. These changes happen when you fall in love as an evolutionary tool to help us to reproduce and sustain the population of our human species.

A joint study between the University of Pisa, Italy and the University of California at San Diego looked at the neurotransmitter serotonin and the brains of people who were falling in love. They found that the levels of a serotonin transporter were as high as they were in the brains of patients with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

No wonder you can’t quit your partner. 5-HT is the serotonin transmitter that you makes you obsessed about your partner. The scientists say that the increase in 5-HT ‘might mediate more enduring and ‘romantic’ forms of love, characterized by ‘obsessive’ pre-occupations about the partner and, consequently, a greater likelihood of bonding and faithfulness to the relationship.’

Related Article: 5 Ways To Increase The Serotonin In Your Brain

You increase your levels of other neurotransmitters

Dopamine and oxytocin are two other neurotransmitters that make you feel good. Oxytocin is such a strong naturally-produced pain-killer that it is given to women during childbirth. Increased levels of oxytocin is one thing that happens to your body when you fall in love. Oxytocin is often called the ‘cuddle hormone’ because it is also produced during intimate snuggle time.

Dopamine levels also increase when you fall in love. Dopamine is like a happy drug for your brain and it makes you want more of the good stuff. To get more dopamine, you want more love from your partner.

Your heart rate and breathing synchronizes to your partner’s

Does your heart beat only for your true love? That’s entirely possible because researchers at the University of California at Davis say couples who were connected to monitors measuring their heart rates and rates of respiration had heart rates that were in sync. The research also revealed that the couples breathed in and out at the same intervals.

The scientists found that women tended to adjust their heart rate and breathing to match that of their male partners, rather than the other way around. The researchers explain this as similar to the tendency of women to adapt to their partners’ preferences in a relationship and their tendency to have a higher capacity for emotional empathy as well.

The couples were a few feet away from each other and did not touch each other or speak. When couples who are in love have been separated from each other, their heart rates spike when they see each other again.

(C) Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

This Is For Every Person Who Has Ever Had Anxiety

In the fast-paced, chaotic world we live in today, it seems that more people suffer from anxiety than ever before.

In fact, according to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, 40 million adults age 18 or older in the United States have some anxiety disorder, making anxiety the most common mental illness in America.

Often, anxiety can feel incredibly isolating, lonely, and scary and can make the sufferer feel like no one truly understands. Anxiety only rests while you sleep, and even then, sleep seems to evade you more nights than it should. Anxiety clouds your mind so much that you can barely differentiate reality from the one you’ve created inside your mind. Indeed, the one within speaks so much louder. Does the battle ever end? Do hope, love, and happiness ever win?

As someone who suffers from anxiety herself, I can relate to how debilitating, hopeless, and frustrating you feel if you have anxiety. The following letter goes out to everyone who battles their mind daily and might need a little something to keep them going.

This Is For Everyone Who Has Ever Had Anxiety

stress and anxietyAnxiety doesn’t care whether you feel tired or fed up; it persists despite your weariness. Moreover, it trudges on and infiltrates your mind just when you thought you’d found peace. It doesn’t let up. It only seems to get worse when you try to fight it. The moment you wish it would just leave you alone for a while, it seems to bite back twice as hard.

Anxiety haunts you in your sleep and follows you around during the day. It doesn’t let your mind rest, always making you fixate, contemplate, and suffocate. You didn’t ask for this, and you can’t understand why you can’t attain peace. Life already comes with challenges, but the anxiety makes it worse because EVERYTHING feels like a huge obstacle.

Going on simple errands seems draining before you even walk out the door, and giving a presentation at work prompts panic and significant discomfort. Life moves so quickly, and it seems that taking time to rest and refuel one’s mind and body is looked down upon. This world wasn’t made for the anxious, so where do all those who have anxiety fit in? How do we deal with a world that asks us to keep on going even when we feel we can’t take another step?

With so much to worry about, it seems that peace of mind is either a distant memory or a paradise island you can’t afford to visit. Anxiety creeps up when you least expect it and stays around long after you try to send it packing. It doesn’t ever want to leave! It builds a permanent home in your mind and robs you of all positive thoughts and feelings. You try to fit in, smile at strangers, keep up with friendships, and go about your everyday life, but inside, you know something feels wrong.

The worst part…

You try to correct these thoughts and feelings and heal them from within, but anxiety is a tricky beast to tame. Anxiety is a silent monster, sabotaging your mind and taking up valuable space when you didn’t even invite it inside. It just comes and goes when it wants and seems to stay far too long when it does visit.

Anxiety doesn’t understand you when you say you need a break or when you question the voices running through your mind. It’s persistent, resistant, and cruel, a parasite that sucks your energy and clouds your brain. Anxiety doesn’t just live in the mind, though. You know the feeling all too well. Perhaps you have jittery nerves, a racing heart, butterflies in your stomach, headaches, nausea, blushing, a lump in your throat, sweaty palms, and the sheer panic that overtakes you in a stressful situation.

The worst part is you can’t seem to differentiate between a stressful and harmless environment. Eventually, it all seems to bleed together. Everything seems stressful because your brain can’t remember how it should feel in certain situations.

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Final Thoughts on Reaching Out to Anyone Who Has Ever Had Anxiety

If you are one of the millions who suffer from an anxiety disorder, please don’t hesitate to get help if you need it. It doesn’t make you weak or a burden to ask for help. Instead, it makes you brave and strong to admit that you have a problem and need guidance. No one should have to go through this life alone. So don’t hold back your thoughts or feelings just because society tells you to. Sit down and talk with a loved one, write in a journal, meditate, or do anything that helps feel a sense of release and relaxation.

We live in a stressed-out world, but this doesn’t mean you have to take on the feelings of the majority. Take time away from society, and don’t apologize for it. Nature, going within, taking care of your body, having positive people in your life, having a sense of purpose, and helping others can all help to alleviate feelings of anxiety. Never give up because the feelings won’t last forever. You have to be willing to work on yourself and have the courage to fight the demons in your mind. Remember, they can’t win if you don’t let them.

(C) Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

7 Stretches In 7 Minutes For Lower Back Pain Relief

There really is no other way to say this: back pain sucks. Anyone who has experienced a back injury or a bout with back pain can attest to how much it sucks. Back pain is also incredibly common: 31 million Americans experience back pain during any given time.

The agony caused by back pain can be excruciating and even lead to disability or handicap. Common back pain also requires due diligence in order to care for it effectively. The most common types of back pain involve aches, spasms, and stiffness – all of which contribute to an affliction that is sometimes difficult to manage or predict.

One lifestyle trend that has led to prolific back pain is the sedentary nature of our daily lives. More of us work sitting in a cubicle than at any other time in history. Spending more time in the office or working from home means more sitting and less exercise. Less exercise leads to a complacent body, which is turn leads to less muscle activity. Do you see where this is going?

The good thing is that we can do more to both prevent and heal back pain. As it turns out, stretching is one of the best methods for doing both. It doesn’t require much time either.

Back pain is the leading cause of disability in Americans under 45 years old. More than 26 million Americans between the ages of 20-64 experience frequent back pain. National Centers for Health Statistics

Here are 7 stretches that you can do in 7 minutes to help reduce back pain:

fix posture

1. The “Complete” Back Stretch

You can do this quick stretch if you have something you can grab onto – a countertop, desk, couch, table, etc. –. Simply hold onto the surface and walk backward, maneuvering the back until it is at a 90 degree angle. Make sure to push the butt upwards until pressure can be felt in the lower back. Hold this position for about 15 seconds. Repeat.

2. The Spine Stretch

Lay on the floor with legs and arms flat. Make sure the legs are together. Rest the left hand around the abdominal area, keeping the right arm straight and flat against the floor. Keeping the legs together, bend them towards the waist. Slowly rotate the legs leftwards as far as possible while keeping the rest of the body in position. Hold for about 20 seconds. Repeat.

3. The Hamstring Stretch That Reduces Back Pain

Lay flat on your back and place your hands behind the thigh. Slowly lift the leg with your hands while sliding them down towards the foot until fully stretched. Hold this position for about 20 seconds and repeat with the other leg. This stretch is particularly effective for instances of lower back pain.

4. The Knee To Chest Stretch

This stretch is performed exactly as advertised. Simply lay flat on the ground, eyes upwards. Flex either leg at the knee and place your hands on the shin. Pull your knee towards the chest until you feel tight. Hold this position for about 20 seconds and then repeat with the opposite leg. Repeat two or three times.

5. The Piriformis Stretch

While this stretch sounds complicated, it is relatively easy. Lay on your back and cross the left leg over the right, resting your left ankle on the right knee. Grab ahold of your left knee with your hands and gently pull it toward the opposite shoulder. Hold this position for 20 seconds and relax. Switch sides and repeat twice.

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6. The Hip Flexors Stretch for Back Pain

There are a few different variations of this stretch. The one we’ll describe here is arguably the simplest and most effective. Get yourself into a half-kneeling position – the back leg is the one that is to be stretched. Drive your hips forward until the back knee is resting on the group. This exercise should stretch the iliopsoas, a primary hip flexor that, when stretched, can alleviate lower back pain.

7. The Lying Down Quadriceps Stretch

The quadriceps are also attached to your lower back. Loosening up and relaxing these muscles can help to relax any tension, which is often the source of lower back pain. Lay on your side with a hand supporting your head. Grab the lower shin and pull the leg back behind the body as far as possible. Hold the position for about 20 seconds. Switch sides and repeat once or twice more.

 

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