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10 Signs You Deserve More In Your Relationship

You deserve more from your relationship if you are less than blissfully happy right now. Being unsatisfied in your relationship means that your current level of happiness with your partner is not meeting your expectations.

This doesn’t mean that you need to leave your partner, it means that you need to evaluate your expectations, ask for what you need, and work with your partner to make sure that you are getting all of your needs met.

You deserve more from your relationship if you feel like your needs aren’t being met. Let’s look at the signs that you deserve more from your relationship and some ways to get it.

10 Signs You Deserve More From Your Relationship

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1. You haven’t cuddled in months

Cuddling releases the hormone oxytocin, which is why it has been given the nickname ‘the cuddle hormone.’ Oxytocin is released when mothers nurse their infants and when humans who care for each other are touching and in close contact with each other.

Your craving for oxytocin is perfectly natural. Going without it is like going on a crash diet where you starve yourself. Physical touch is important to create a bond of trust, intimacy and emotional well-being. If you need more touch, ask for it.

2. You feel insecure about your partner

Feeling insecure is different from actually being insecure. Your relationship is not secure if your partner has already threatened to leave or is taking action to exit the relationship. Feeling like your partner is going to leave or worrying about it when there is no evidence that they are considering leaving is another type of insecurity.

Psychologists studying adult attachment style in romantic relationships have identified three styles; secure, anxious-ambivalent (fears rejection and wants security), or avoidant (emotionally distant). These attachment styles have to do with how we feel about our partner’s ability to meet our needs. Those with anxious-ambivalent and avoidant attachment styles in relationships feel less secure with their partners.

In a study of 118 male and female college students, people who had either the anxious-ambivalent or avoidant attachment styles also had more irrational beliefs about their relationship than those with a secure adult attachment style. People who worried about their partner leaving them had lower overall relationship satisfaction.

3. You give more than you get

Some people are just naturally more giving than others and they enjoy doing it. If your partner takes advantage of your giving nature, you can feel like your relationship is out of balance.

A one-sided relationship is what you’re in if you give more to your partner. You deserve someone who can anticipate your needs. Your romantic partner should be able to at least provide for your basic mental and emotional needs.

4. Your partner doesn’t express gratitude

Being taken for granted is a sign that you deserve more from your relationship.

Researchers in the European Journal of Personality studied people who stayed in relationships compared to those who left. They found that ‘Being dependable rather than being dependent seemed to be a protective factor for relationship continuation.’

In other words, being able to manage their own well-being away from their partner helped them to feel more self-reliance. Being self-reliant helped people to stick it out in a relationship where they felt unappreciated by their partner.

5. You take the lead most of the time

If not for you, you would be homebodies who never went out, never had plans with friends and never celebrated a birthday or anniversary. You are the one always making plans and your partner is along for the ride.

6. Your partner spends a lot of time away

Being around your partner is the highlight of your day, but your partner doesn’t seem to feel the same way. At least that’s how you feel when they spend a lot of their time on other activities with other people.

Related article: 5 Signs You’re In A Relationship With Your Soulmate

7. You are excluded from family events

Your partner should treat you as a priority in all things, including family events. You are your partner’s most important family member and they need to treat you as such. Feeling left out is a sign you deserve more from your relationship.

8. Your partner doesn’t act accountable

Your partner should be able to admit when they were wrong and choose to act differently in the future. You may find that you are saying ‘I’m sorry’ more often than your partner does after a fight.

9. You daydream often

Your future that you fantasize about doesn’t have your partner in it. The reason is that you don’t see your partner supporting you in your ideal future so your daydreams don’t include them either.

10. You’re feeling resentful

When the balance of power in your relationship is tilted away from your favor, you begin to feel anger and resentment that your partner has it better than you do.

7 Habits of Inspired People

Learning the success habits of inspired people is not hard; it is just a matter of practicing being who you aspire to be. It’s easier to turn the alarm off than to get up and go work out, but the person you want to be is already back from a run and making breakfast.

In this article we will look at the habits that make up the go-getters, the movers and shakers, and the early birds that are out there getting the worm before you. Let’s learn how to be motivated, disciplined, and inspiring to others.

7 Habits of Inspired People

1. Set SMART Goals for Yourself

A goal that is non-specific can set you up for failure. How will you know if you’ve achieved your goal unless you give it some details? That is what SMART goals are meant to do.

A SMART goal is:

Specific – It spells out what exactly you want to achieve

Measurable – You or someone else will know if you’ve gotten there because you can measure it.

Attainable -You know that it is within the realm of possibility to do this.

Relevant – It is important to you now and it will still be important to you in the future.

Time-bound – There is a deadline when you want to achieve this goal by

So an example of a non-specific goal might be, ‘I want to save money to go on a vacation.?’ A SMART goal would be ‘I want to save $3400 by May 1, 2017 for a vacation to Ireland.’

2. Take accountability

You alone, or maybe with the help of a couple of your best supporters, are able to accomplish what you want to achieve. Taking accountability means taking responsibility for your action or lack of action.

Related article: 9 Things You Never Knew Your Brain Could Do

Whose fault is it that you didn’t go for a run when it was raining? Let’s look at your choices if your goal is to run every day and it’s rainy:

1. Get wet and run anyway

2. Exercise indoors

3. Make up the run on another day

4. Sleep in

The truth is that it was your own fault and no one else’s if you chose to sleep in. Accept that you made this choice consciously and now make another choice to choose differently next time.

3. Know yourself

When you know your likes and dislikes, you can help yourself to be successful. For example, if you know that you don’t cook at home very often because you hate planning and preparing meals, then get help with this step. If you know that you won’t workout unless you do it in the morning, make sure you get to exercise in the morning.

Avoid your known pitfalls, know what excites you and use that information to get yourself going. Say ‘When I achieve this goal I will be able to ____.’

4. Do what you are dreading right away

That one thing that you don’t want to do and have been avoiding doing? That’s the one you should be tacking first. Once it’s done, everything else will be easier.

Brian Tracy, author of Eat That Frog and more than 60 other books on success, productivity, learning, and more says ‘Mark Twain once said that if the first thing you do each morning is to eat a live frog, you can go through the day with the satisfaction of knowing that that is probably the worse things that is going to happen to you all day long. Your ‘frog’ is your biggest, most important task, the one you are most likely to procrastinate on if you don’t do something about it.’

Related article: 5 Things You Can Do In 5 Minutes That You’ll Use Forever

Procrastinating is part of why you have not reached your goal yet. The fear of the one activity or project hat you need to do is blocking your progress for the rest of the day. Rip the bandaid off.

5. Be more militant

Create some military discipline around your life by dictating how things must be in order for you, and the members of your team if there are any, to achieve the goals that you have spelled out.

Craft your day to build success and progress toward your goal. You might schedule a 12:00 meeting with yourself to check in and see how you are doing on your progress.

Make this an efficient, quick meeting by setting an agenda:

1. Ask yourself what obstacles are keeping you from making forward progress and make a decision to get rid of them

2. Say some motivating words to yourself

3. Get back to work.

6. Celebrate progress

If your goal is to lose 20 lbs then an inspired person doesn’t reward themselves with an ice cream sundae once they’ve lost 5 lbs. What you can do instead to reward yourself for this accomplishment is buy a new workout outfit or something that supports your goal and keeps you inspired.

7. Plan for setbacks and learn to avoid them

You are an inspired work in progress and each day is a chance to start over. Give yourself a break if you’ve slipped in working toward your goal and make a plan for how to prevent slipping in the future.

For example, if you forgot your gym shoes in your bag, set them out for the next morning. Make this a habit to prevent yourself from sabotaging your efforts to get healthy. Set yourself up for success by making it harder to fail next time.

7 Signs Your Partner Is Depressed

Depression is a term often thrown about when we’re feeling down – when things aren’t going according to plan. But behind depressed is much more than just that.

Using depression to describe a mood that is fleeting isn’t an accurate description of the disease that, according to the World Health Organization (WHO), affects over 350 million people globally. “Sadness is an emotion, whereas depression is an illness,” says psychiatrist Ken Robbins of the University of Wisconsin-Madison.

Depression afflicts so many people worldwide, so it’s likely that you or someone you know has battled the disease at some point in their life. Being in a relationship with someone who suffers from depression isn’t easy, and it’s especially more difficult if you aren’t aware that they are affected by it. Pay attention to the following signs in your partner, as these might point to concealed depression.

Seven Signs Your Partner Is Depressed

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1. ISOLATION

When someone is depressed, they’re often reluctant to be in the company of others. Part of this is a lack of interest, and part is the fear of being the Debbie Downer of the group. There is also a fear of being rejected by others, which increases the reluctance to engage socially.

They might have one or more of these characteristics:

– Few or no friends

– Labeled as newly “anti-social”

– Cancelling social events at the last minute

– Avoiding face-to-face contact with others

– Friends, family and others are concerned with lack of interaction

– Pessimism

– Low self-esteem

2. LOSS OF INTEREST

This is a big one. Activities that used to bring such joy and fulfillment to the person no longer do. Needless to say, this is painful for both the individual and those who care for them. The afflicted person can even lose interest in their spouse or children, often leading to bigger problems.

It’s also worth mentioning that necessary but less engaging tasks (work, chores, etc.) become more arduous and are often ignored or done hastily.

3. SUBSTANCE ABUSE

Navigating the ups and downs of life is difficult enough, but for the depressed it is nearly impossible at times. To escape this trap, they often turn to the use of alcohol or drugs. Understandably, alcohol and drug use occurs because the person is seeking to numb their pain or feel the happiness that they long for. However, this only works for a short while and as tolerance increases so does the likelihood of addiction.

Related article: 8 Signs You May Have Depression

4. MOOD SWINGS

Chemical imbalances in the brain often lead to abrupt changes in mood. A depressed person can go from happy to crying to something else within a short span of time. Things and events that used to cause little to no reaction – a sarcastic joke, for example – now cause fits of anger or irritability. If someone you care about is demonstrating these sorts of changes, understand that it can be due to depression. Don’t judge too hastily, however; normal changes in hormones can lead to mood swings as well.

5. CHANGES IN APPETITE

This is a tricky one because “changes in appetite” can be a depressed person not touching food on a plate (“are they not hungry?”) or someone scarfing a gallon of ice cream (“maybe they just feeling like binging…”) until it’s gone. The former doesn’t have the willingness to eat, as they are too busy attending to their thoughts while the latter uses food as much-needed source of comfort. Either way, drastic changes in appetite are often a clear sign of depression.

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6. EXHAUSTION

A lethargic approach to many of one’s responsibilities is only natural for people lacking enthusiasm. People with depression constantly deal with the internal chatter of their minds, which is exhausting in itself. It is no wonder then why they have very little energy for anything else. Excessive states of tiredness could indicate the presence of depression.

7. INSOMNIA

You may think that because of #6 a depressed person would have no issue with sleeping. As with many other depressive symptoms, however, sleep problems can vary widely. Some will sleep the majority of the day while others will skimp by on maybe a couple of hours if that. A drastic change in sleep pattern is often one of the more obvious signs of depression.

 

11 Quotes To Remember When You Have Problems

Living on Earth comes with a certain amount of problems that happen – I think we can all agree on that. No human can become exempt from this inevitable fact, but we can all learn how to deal with the challenges in better ways. With the responsibilities on our backs and the stress of daily life on our hearts, we can easily become overwhelmed and allow our emotions to get the best of us.

However, next time you feel frazzled by all of the problems you face, keep these quotes in mind to get you through the day.

11 Quotes To Remember When Problems Happen

1. You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.

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Nothing in life lasts – everything is temporary, including your pain. Accept the situation at hand instead of fighting it, and life will go a lot more smoothly. What we resist, persists. So, by embracing whatever reality you currently face and going with the flow, you can more easily deal with life’s challenges.

2. “You can’t control everything. Sometimes you just need to relax and have faith that things will work out. Let go a little and just let life happen.” – Kody Keplinger

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Trying to control everything is a fruitless endeavor. The only thing you really have control over is yourself, so let everything else go. You can’t control everything that happens in life, so only focus on what you do have control over.

3. One day you’re going to look back and laugh at all of this.

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We tend to take life so seriously sometimes, but forget how quickly it’s over. Instead of stressing out about every little thing, remember to keep smiling through all of the storms and appreciate the little things. Those are the things you’ll remember at the end of the day, anyway. At the end of your life, you won’t care if you paid the electric bill, how much money you have in your account, or that silly argument you had with your friend. Remember what counts.

4. The more you love yourself, the less nonsense you’ll tolerate.

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Loving yourself is the key to unlocking everything that’s good in life. Without love for yourself, you can’t attract healthy relationships, fruitful job opportunities, or anything that will bring you long-term happiness. Focus on bettering yourself, and the world around you will start to look better.

5. Today I refuse to stress myself out about things I cannot control or change.

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Stress doesn’t do anything for us except make us mentally and physically unhealthy. Instead of allowing stress to overtake your body and mind, bring yourself to a state of quiet awareness. Focus on what you can change, and forget about everything else.

6. Good things are coming down the road. Just don’t stop walking.

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Life can seem challenging at times, but we can learn valuable lessons through it all. Keep on going, no matter what you have on your plate. You WILL reach the light at the end of the tunnel if you just keep the faith.

7. The pain you’ve been feeling can’t compare to the joy that is coming.

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We tend to think that everything that happens to us will last forever, but it is all temporary. The pain will take you to the place you’ve always wanted to go, a state of bliss and relief. You just have to trust the process and remember that there’s a lesson in every obstacle.

8. Sometimes it takes a good fall to really know where you stand.

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When problems happen, remember that you sometimes have to fall in order to get back up stronger than ever. Problems don’t define you; your attitude about the situation does. You’ll know yourself better after going through tough times, so don’t discount their purpose.

9. “You’re a beautiful combination of stardust and ocean waves; you are human and it’s okay to mess up.” – Katherine Murphy

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Don’t set too high standards for yourself or beat yourself up if you make a mistake. You didn’t come to this world perfect, and no human being can ever stand up to perfection. Accept your flaws, and realize that they make you beautiful.

10. You may have had a bad past but you don’t have to have a bad future. Leave it behind you and stay positive.

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Don’t allow your past to define you. Look ahead to the future with optimism, and look to the present moment with awareness and gratitude.

11. It’s amazing how differently you can see something after leaving it for a while and then revisiting it later.

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Problems seem so serious when we focus too much on them, but by zooming out for a second, we can get a clearer picture.

Who Is Your Perfect Partner Based On Your Zodiac Sign?

Are you looking for love in all the wrong places? Has this tiresome activity left you wondering where to find your perfect partner? Your compatible zodiac mate is out there waiting for you, so let’s look at what astrological sign is most likely to be a perfect match for you.

Who Is Your Perfect Partner Based On Your Zodiac Sign?

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Aries’ love style: this sign of the zodiac is usually the one doing the chasing rather than being chased. An Aries is assertive about what they desire, and if they want you, you will know it right away. The Aries wants clear communication and lots of passion, yet they also want a balance of relaxation time with a loving touch or massage from their partner.

Perfect partner for Aries: a Libra is the Aries’ perfect partner. Gemini, Leo, Sagittarius, Scorpio, and Aquarius make compatible matches as well.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Taurus’ love style: a Taurean has a love of sensuality; they will deeply appreciate intimate times shared with their partner. Arouse Taurus’ senses of touch, smell, sight, hearing, and taste, and they will be on fire. Know, however, that the Taurus likes to select a partner with extreme care. They can be slow to trust.

Perfect partner for Taurus: the Scorpio makes the perfect partner for this zodiac sign. Cancer, Virgo, Pisces, and Capricorn make compatible partner matches as well.

Gemini (May 21 – June 21)

Gemini’s love style: the Gemini is relaxed about sex and has no hang-ups about nudity. A Gemini often enjoys flirting with the wild side of sex; being intimate in a variety of places with varying styles will please them. Communication and fun are also important to Gemini.

Perfect partner for Gemini: Sagittarius is the perfect partner for Gemini. Libra, Leo, Aries, Gemini, Sagittarius, and Aquarius are also compatible.

Cancer (June 22 – July 22)

Cancer’s love style: a Cancer is slow to warm up to intimacy, but once they feel they can open up, they are tender lovers. Cancers like emotion with their lovemaking, and will prefer a bond of deep caring with their partner before becoming intimate. This sign of the zodiac enjoys using all of their senses with their lover.

Perfect partner for Cancer: a Capricorn is the perfect partner for the Cancer. Taurus, Leo, Capricorn, and Pisces are compatible partner matches as well.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Leo’s love style: a Leo has the stamina, passion, and energy needed to have legendary lovemaking sessions. A Leo has natural charisma that attracts potential mates, so they rarely have to pursue love. This zodiac sign loves the pleasure of sex and foreplay, and will enjoy a playful tease with their partner.

Perfect partner for Leo: The Aquarius is Leo’s perfect partner. At the same time, Scorpio, Libra, Aries, Sagittarius, and other Leos can be compatible matches as well.

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Virgo (Aug 23 – Sept 22)

Virgo’s love style: A Virgo has a lot of physical and emotional energy to give to the art of lovemaking. The Virgo’s symbol is the virgin. Keep this in mind when you consider that they like a serene environment, and a partner who will provide slow, sensual touching of any kind as foreplay. A Virgo needs to trust you before becoming intimate, but once trust is built, they turn up the heat quickly.

Perfect partner for Virgo: Pisces is the perfect partner for Virgo. Taurus, Libra, Cancer, and Capricorn are compatible partner matches as well.

Libra (Sept 23 – Oct 22)

Libra’s love style: realize that Libra’s erogenous zone is their brain. A Libra loves communication in bed and out, so give direction and take direction well if you want to please them. Speaking words of love and intimacy also helps. Libra like visual stimulation, so artfully display your body for your partner’s appreciation.

Perfect partner for Libra: Aries is the perfect partner for Libra. Gemini, Leo, Aquarius, and Sagittarius also make compatible partner matches.

Scorpio (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

Scorpio’s love style: the Scorpio is a powerful force in intimacy. As a passionate lover with a high sex drive, Scorpio likes to play with creative scenarios involving power and control. Scorpio has a lot of energy to devote to lovemaking and they also have a deep emotional connection to their partner.

Perfect partner for Scorpio: Taurus is the perfect partner for Scorpio. Leo, Virgo, Cancer, and Pisces are compatible partner matches as well.

Sagittarius (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

Sagittarius’ love style: New is the best thing for a Sagittarius in the bedroom. If it hasn’t been tried before, bring it on. Otherwise, your Sagittarrian lover may become bored. A Sagittarius is charming and affectionate in and out of the bedroom, and enjoys having fun in a relationship.

Perfect partner for Sagittarius: Gemini is the perfect partner for Sagittarius. Leo, Aries, Libra, and Aquarius are compatible partner matches as well.

Capricorn (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

Capricorn’s love style: a Capricorn is one of the most sexual zodiac signs, as is Scorpio, but the Capricorn is more emotional. Private time with your Capricorn lover will be sensual. It will often open your heart to the love that Capricorn is pouring on. The Capricorn is slow to open their heart, so consider yourself special if they welcome you into an intimate relationship.

Perfect partner for Capricorn: Cancer is Capricorn’s perfect partner. Taurus, Pisces, Scorpio, and Virgo make compatible partners as well.

Aquarius (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Aquarius’ love style: an Aquarian likes to keep things lively in lovemaking. The Aquarius is open to suggestions and likes playfulness and flirtation. The Aquarius loves communication, both in and out of the bedroom, so keep your partner mentally aroused.

Perfect partner for Aquarius: Leo is the perfect partner for Aquarius. Gemini, Libra, Aries, Sagittarius, and Virgo are compatible partner matches as well.

Pisces (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

Pisces’ love style: a Pisces is naturally attractive and they easily charm their partner into bed. This zodiac sign is very loving and romantic, playful, yet also deep. When the Pisces speaks to their lover, the words draw you deeper into their soul.

Perfect partner for Pisces: Virgo is a Pisces’ perfect partner. Scorpio, Cancer, Taurus, Capricorn, and Libra are compatible partner matches as well.

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5 Signs You’re Holding Onto Negative Energy

Sometimes holding onto negative energy of any kind is like drinking small dosages of poison. Over a long period of time it can kill you. It eats at the physical, emotional and spiritual bodies. Negative energy is toxic. It shows up disguised in many ways.

Here are 5 signs you might just be holding onto negative energy and don’t even know it:

Related article: 6 Signs You Need To Clear Negative Energy

1. You are overcome by guilt and anxiety.

Are you experiencing erratic chest palpitations at night? Do you partake in homemade-mind movies full of guilt and shame from the past? Are you having a difficult time sleeping? These can be signs of negative energy holding you back. As you move throughout the day you are too busy to capture these signs. Unfortunately at night when there is nothing else to be done, the mind starts recreating scenarios and causing panic.

You can’t get past the fear during the night. You are stricken by fear of the unknown. Your body starts discomfort. A research by scientists from the National Institutes Health found that cells respond to stress in many levels. “Your heart rate speeds up. Your muscles tense. Your face may even blush. Stressors threaten how cells function.”

Do not fight against this because it just makes it worse. Instead, start mindfully breathing. Hold down one nostril and breathe in through the other. Inhale profoundly and exhale deeply. Continue doing this while alternating nostrils. Become mindfully aware of the release. Allow your brain to get enough oxygen. Let your body relax enough to return to its normal state. You cannot control anything. Fear is an illusion. Anxiety is a way to get your attention.

2. You stop doing things you enjoy.

Negative energy sucks the life out of you. You go about the day full of responsibilities. When you are depressed there is only so much you can accomplish. If you feel overwhelmed by life you will have little energy to do the things that make you happy. It’s important to carve out some time to eliminate the negativity. Sit outside and drink a cup of coffee before heading to work. Walk on the grass barefooted. Allow nature to ground you and release the negativity.

When we are under negative energy it’s hard to find joy. It’s important that you try to bring back those things that you find enjoyable. Even something as simple as taking a bubble bath can shift your mood. It’s in the small things that we are brought to positive light. Start small by creating a sense of worth and happiness. You will eventually dispel the energy blockage that’s holding you back.

3. Your weight has fluctuated.

Overeating or not eating are signs of energy shifts. If your weight has changed drastically it is important to address it. The body has warning flags and fluctuation in weight is one of them. Listen to the cravings or the lack of them. Pay attention to signs of an unhealthy body or one that is just suffering from negativity through emotional obstruction. Make time for hiking, walking, swimming or yoga. Activities such as these require peace of mind that helps re-establish balance in the body.

4. You are cranky and irritable.

When we are under stress our emotions react differently. If you are normally a happy well-balanced person but, as of late, you are short-tempered, that’s a sign you are holding on to negative energy. We enter into a “fight or flight” mentality. If things are imbalanced we cannot see them in a healthy manner. Therefore, we snap at everything. We have a short fuse. We become irritated by every rub through words or touch. It’s that time that you must step back and ask for help. Journal, speak with a professional, exercise, use your creativity, or volunteer at a shelter. Sometimes seeing past our own demons allow us to find perspective. By placing a focus outside of your issues you start to create a sense of worth again.

5. You are being overly judgmental.

If you find yourself comparing and judging like never before, you are holding on to some major negative energy. When you are unhappy you find things wrong in everyone else. Judgment is a way to deflect on your own issues. By placing blame, scrutinizing and comparing others, you stop dealing with your own life. Judging is also a way to avoid confronting your emotions and the things that you fear most. You cannot change your beliefs until you change the expectations and assumptions they are built upon. It’s time to ask yourself: What is causing the criticism and judgment? What are you afraid of? What can you learn from this experience? Stepping back and taking responsibility for your thoughts and actions is a way to recharge the energy and make it positive.

We are made from negative and positive energies. It’s the duality of life. When you hold onto negativity it clouds everything around you. You know what’s best for you. Find balance, find joy, and find what works for you in order to return to the light.

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