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11 Quotes To Remember When You Feel Angry

April 28, 2016 by Power of Positivity

Anger can swallow you up and eat you whole if you allow it. When something unfavorable happens in our lives, it can seem all too easy to lash out, get angry, become defensive, and overreact before really thinking about the consequences of our words and actions.

This world can be incredibly frustrating, and it’s easy to lose our tempers every once in a while. When you feel your blood start to boil next time, refer to these quotes to keep your anger under control.

11 Quotes To Remember When You Feel Angry

1. Every day you must unlearn the ways that hold you back. You must rid yourself of negativity, so you can learn to fly. – Leon Brown

Even if your day begins in a way that makes you frustrated and overwhelmed, remember to take a few deep breaths, center yourself, and remember your intentions for the day. You don’t have the power to control every single thing that happens to you, but you can control how you react to it and what type of energy you will bring into each moment.

2. I knew I matured when I realized every situation doesn’t need a reaction, sometimes you just have to leave people to do the things they do.

You don’t have to give everything in life a reaction. Sometimes the best thing to do is stay silent and walk away instead of becoming angry. Not much is worth getting angry over, so remember that you have the power to choose how you will react, and you have a limited amount of energy. Don’t waste it on things and people that don’t really matter in the end.

3. A couple of years from now, everything you’re stressing about won’t even matter. Keep moving forward.

What matters so much now will seem insignificant down the road. Don’t overreact or put too much emphasis on the little things. Look at the bigger picture, enjoy life, and don’t take the ride too seriously.

4. Put your focus into loving and creating, not gossip and hating. – Kristen Butler

So much unnecessary hatred and animosity flows rampantly in society, and it doesn’t have to. We can create the world we wish, so if we want a more loving, compassionate world, we must do away with uncalled for angry feelings and low vibrational conversations.

5. Do not get upset with people or situations. Both are powerless without your reaction.

Your reaction basically allows a situation to unfold in a certain manner. Therefore, by not giving your energy to people and things that don’t require it, you can conserve that energy for things that truly matter to you. Being upset only means that you have given up your power to others and will allow people to control your emotions. Always remember that you have ultimate governance over your own emotions, and you don’t have to let others get under your skin.

6. Sometimes…you have to let go to allow better things to come into your life.

Sometimes a closed door only means that better things are on their way from another direction. You have to eventually let go of what no longer serves you in order to attract what will serve the evolution of your consciousness in the best way.

7. The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present. – Barbara De Angelis

Holding onto the past will only delay the gifts you can receive in the present and the blessings that await you in the future. The past serves a purpose, but it can only teach you if you apply those lessons to the present and the future. Dwelling in the past won’t allow you to move on, and it will keep you in a state of constant frustration and anger.

8. I don’t get mad anymore. I just accept it for what it is and move on.

Anger only hurts you in the end, so remember that you have the ultimate power to either accept it and learn a lesson from it, or to hold it in and allow the event or person to control you. We cannot control what happens in this world, but we can control how we respond to it.

9. Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

Like we’ve said already, anger only hurts you in the end. Don’t hold onto emotions that drain you mentally, physically, and emotionally. Allow the anger to pass through you, feel it fully, and release it so that you may move on and not hold onto harmful energy.

10. You can come out bitter or you can come out better. There is purpose in your pain.

Always remember that being angry serves a purpose that we may not always have awareness of. Either the anger exists to show you a new perspective, move on, or realize something within you that you still need to work on. However, all of these reasons have a purpose, and it will get better in time.

11 Life Changing Lessons From Ram Dass

April 27, 2016 by Power of Positivity

Dr. Richard Alpert, better known as Ram Dass, didn’t begin his journey of spirituality until taking a variety of psychedelics. While he grew up Jewish and even had a bar mitzvah, he didn’t “have one whiff of God until [he] took psychedelics.” Ram Dass taught psychology at Harvard University and heavily researched psychedelics with Dr. Timothy Leary. His whole life changed when he took a trip to India in 1967, where he met his guru Neem Karoli Baba, who took him down the path of true spirituality. After this trip, Richard Alpert changed his name and began sharing what he had learned.

His most famous book, Be Here Now, brought Eastern wisdom and ancient knowledge into the Western world in an easily understandable and highly engaging format.

Ram Dass continues to share his knowledge of spirituality today, and the following are some of the most important lessons we can learn from him.

11 Life-Changing Lessons From Ram Dass

1. Love isn’t found in another person; it’s found within you – it’s a state of being.

Unconditional love really exists in each of us. It is part of our deep inner being. It is not so much an active emotion as a state of being. It’s not ‘I love you’ for this or that reason, not ‘I love you if you love me.’ It’s love for no reason, love without an object.

You are loved just for being who you are, just for existing. You don’t have to do anything to earn it. Your shortcomings, your lack of self-esteem, physical perfection, or social and economic success – none of that matters. No one can take this love away from you, and it will always be here.

If I go into the place in myself that is love, and you go into the place in yourself that is love, we are together in love. Then you and I are truly in love, the state of being love. That’s the entrance to Oneness. That’s the space I entered when I met my guru.

The universe is an example of love. Like a tree. Like the ocean. Like my body. Like my wheelchair. I see the love.

2. Ram Dass takes no experience for granted.

It is important to expect nothing, to take every experience, including the negative ones, as merely steps on the path, and to proceed.

Our plans never turn out as tasty as reality.

You can be still and still moving. Content even in your discontent.

From a Hindu perspective, you are born with what you need to deal with, and if you just try and push it away, whatever it is, it’s got you.

I have always said that the religion you were born with often becomes more important to you as you see the universality of truth.

3. Don’t allow your mind to rule your life.

From a Hindu perspective, you are born as what you need to deal with, and if you just try and push it away, whatever it is, it’s got you.

Pain is the mind. It’s the thoughts of the mind. Then I get rid of the thoughts and get in my witness, which is down in my spiritual heart. The witness that witnesses being. Then those particular thoughts that are painful – love them. I love them to death!

4. Cherish your relationships, but don’t allow them to define you.

When I look at relationships, my own and others, I see a wide range of reasons for people to be together and ways in which they are together. I see ways in which a relationship – something that exists between two or more people – for the most part, reinforces people’s separateness as individual entities.

5. Death is not the end.

I sit with people who are dying. I’m one of those unusual types that enjoy being with someone when they’re dying because I know I am going to be in the presence of Truth.

In working with those dying, I offer another human being a spacious environment in my mind in which they can die as they need to die. I have no right to define how another person should die. I’m just there to help them transition. However, they need to do it.

Working with the dying is like being a midwife for this great rite of passage of death. Just as a midwife helps a being take its first breath, you help a being take their last breath.

The stroke has given me another way to serve people. It lets me feel more deeply the pain of others, to help them know by example that ultimately, whatever happens, no harm can come. ‘Death is perfectly safe,’ I like to say.

We’re all just walking each other home.

6. Don’t take yourself for granted.

Your problem is you’re… too busy holding onto your unworthiness.

Only that in you, which is me, can hear what I’m saying.

I can do nothing for you but work on myself…you can do nothing for me but work on yourself!

7. Allow silence into your life.

The quieter you become, the more you can hear.

If you listen to your own inner voice, it will tell you where you are now, and which method will work best for you in your evolution towards the light.

We’re fascinated by the words–but where we meet is in the silence behind them.

8. Be here now.

Early in the journey you wonder how long the journey will take and whether you will make it in this lifetime. Later you will see that where you are going is HERE and you will arrive NOW…so you stop asking.

9. Don’t allow your emotions to control you.

Emotions are like waves. Watch them disappear in the distance on the vast calm ocean.

10. Don’t try too hard.

The most exquisite paradox… as soon as you give it all up, you can have it all. As long as you want power, you can’t have it. The minute you don’t want power, you’ll have more than you ever dreamed possible.

11. Self-development never truly ends.

I would like my life to be a statement of love and compassion–and where it isn’t, that’s where my work lies.

These Things Happen To Your Body When You Quit Smoking

April 27, 2016 by Power of Positivity

If you are a smoker, you already know the better-known facts about your habit. But it bears reminding–smoking causes much damage to your body. In fact, it might trigger even more health problems than you might realize.

The goal of this article is not to shame any readers for their personal choices. Instead, we aim to give you the facts and data you need in the hope that the information inspires you to kick your nicotine habit to the curb–once and for all!

These Ten Things Happen When You Quit Smoking

To read how quitting smoking is good for your health, here is a link to the Surgeon General’s report on The Health Benefits of Smoking Cessation. Here are a few health-related and lifestyle, and well-being-related things that happen when you quit smoking.

1. Sleep Better When You Quit Smoking

Nicotine is a stimulant, so if you smoke anywhere from one to three hours before your bedtime, your heart is a little faster than a resting rate would be for a non-smoker. When you remove this stimulant nicotine from your daily intake, you help yourself reach a calm physical state before bedtime.

2. You Smell Fresher When You Quit Smoking

Your skin, hair, fingernails, and clothes have all been absorbing the smell of cigarette smoke. Cigarette smoke is not a pleasant smell to non-smokers, so you will have a more attractive scent to both yourself and others by quitting.

Pursing your lips into that smoker’s pucker repeatedly is an excellent way to wrinkle the skin around your lips and cause you to look older than you are. Although you can use wrinkle creams to repair the damage, you can stop adding to the injury by quitting smoking.

3. Better Senses of Taste, Smell

Food will taste better and less bland to you. Flavors that were too subtle for your dull palate to pick up will become more evident. You will feel like a gourmet restaurant critic describing the new sensations you discover. Of course, non-smokers knew this the whole time.

Your sense of smell will be less dull now too. The scent of cigarette smoke will be gone, masked part of the ordinary essences floating around your living environment. Still, you will also be able to pick up on subtle, hardly noticeable scents now that you have quit smoking.

4. Less Coughing and Better Lung Health

Breathing better, more profound, more full, and more relaxing breaths are one of the most immediate benefits of quitting smoking. Your lung capillaries were constricted before you quit smoking, and now they can receive more blood. When the veins fill, the lung lining can expand to full size to accommodate more air per breath.

According to the Surgeon General’s report on The Health Benefits of Smoking Cessation, ‘The risk of dying from lung cancer is 22 times higher among male smokers and 12 times higher among female smokers.’ When you finally quit smoking, the risk decreases between 30-50% of what it would be if you continued smoking, but this is only after ten years.

But don’t let that daunting timeframe bother you. Quit now and start the countdown to less lung cancer risk starting today. An ancient Chinese proverb says ‘The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is today.’

5. You Develop Your Self-control Muscle

Researchers studying self-control see habits like smoking as a failure of self-control. They compare self-control to the function of a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it gets.

Your choice to smoke and continue to smoke is a decision to self-medicate in response to stress. Start developing your toolkit to handle stress in other ways (meditating, reading, laughing, exercise, yoga, etc.), and you will feel more confident in your ability to exercise your self-control.

6. Quit Smoking for More Energy

A recent non-smoker reported feeling more energetic within eight days of quitting. Think how much more you could accomplish in your day with more energy.

7. Your Voice Changes (for the better!)

You lose that husky, throaty, deep phlegmy voice that smokers have.

8. You Get More Done When You Stop Smoking

Now that you have both hands free, you can be more productive. You also don’t have to sneak outside on a smoke break and stand several feet away from the building so that others don’t have to walk through your second-hand smoke. You can also act superior to other smokers or be compassionate to them since you’ve been in their shoes.

9. You Have More Time and Money for Other Things

One smoker who smoked about a pack per day calculated his monthly expense at around $500. It’s hard to be upset about having that much more income per month. This is one of our favorite things that happen when you quit smoking.

You no longer have to drive to the store for cigarettes or stop on your way home. You don’t have to find someone you can bum a smoke off of. So you gain back all of that time you would be spending smoking and greater productivity when you would have been multi-tasking while smoking.

10. You Quit Hanging out in Unsafe Places

Let’s face it, smokers who are sometimes without their crutch often feel compelled to hit up another smoker for a cigarette. The best place to find a smoker who can lend you a smoke is outside a convenience store or gas station. These places are not the safest of environments, and the folks you are hitting up for a small favor might not be the most upstanding people in the neighborhood.

Twenty Harmful Health Consequences of Smoking

Smoking seems cool, and it may calm your nerves, but it’s pretty dangerous to ingest the poisons in cigarettes. According to the CDC, there are over 7,000 chemicals in smokes, and seven of them are carcinogens that cause cancer. Here are some other shocking health consequences of smoking.

1. Smoking Can Cause Lung Diseases

One of the most notorious health risks from smoking is a lung disease, especially since your lungs inhale the toxic smoke. It usually leads to persistent cough, chronic bronchitis, and emphysema. These and other lung issues can work together to cause chronic obstructive pulmonary disease or COPD. It can also lead to various cancers of the lungs that are often fatal.

2. Coronary Disease

Your heart and lungs work together to supply oxygen-rich blood throughout your body. If something like tobacco smoke affects your lungs, your heart will also be affected. A fact sheet published by the CDC states that smoking can cause plaque buildup, which blocks your arteries.

3. Dental Issues May Arise from Smoking

Burning tobacco produces heat, ash, and a lot of smoke. Like any other combustion, the smoke can cause buildup and staining issues. People who smoke often battle nicotine-stained teeth.

An article published by the CDC warns that long-term tobacco use can lead to severe gum disease. Germs and bacteria get trapped in your gums and cause an infection. If it goes untreated, you risk losing your teeth, and there can be bone loss in your jaws.

4. Premature Aging Skin

The next time you’re tempted to light one up, look in the mirror. This terrible habit wreaks havoc on your complexion. Exposure to the burning chemicals weakens your skin’s elasticity, giving it premature wrinkles and a leathery appearance.

5. Complications with Diabetes Type II

If you want to avoid the risks of developing diabetes Type II, kicking the nicotine habit is wise. An article published by the FDA explains that smokers have a thirty to forty percent greater chance of developing this condition. According to the report, nicotine can make your body more insulin resistant, causing imbalances in your blood glucose levels.

6. Smoking May Cause a Loss of Appetite

Many people who quit using tobacco notice that they gain a few pounds. When you smoke, it affects your ability to taste, so you often eat less. As soon as you quit, your tongue livens up, and you enjoy eating again.

7. Reduced Sense of Smell and Taste

Smokers often complain that they can’t appreciate scents and tastes anymore. Nicotine and other chemicals in burning tobacco affect taste buds, and the olfactory nerve controls smell. If you smoke, it’s one of the reasons you can’t smell the putrid smoky scent on you and in your house.

8. Cholesterol Issues

If you have problems regulating your cholesterol, consider tossing the tobacco. Its toxic chemicals raise your harmful LDL levels while reducing your good HDL levels. They also can increase your triglycerides, which is yet another health risk.

9. Smoking Can Impair Your Vision

Remember the classic love song about smoke getting in your eyes? Billowing smoke clouds from burning love may be sweet, but not when they’re from tobacco. Puffing on these toxic products can eventually lead to visual problems like cataracts and glaucoma.

10. Increase the Likelihood of Blood Clots

According to an article published by the American Heart Association, smokers have more risks of developing blood clots. The inhaled poisons get in your bloodstream and cause platelets to adhere to each other. These clots can be lethal if they strike your brain, heart, or lungs.

11. Infertility Issues

Think again before you light up a smoke after intimate moments, especially if you want children. The nicotine habit can lead to fertility problems in both men and women, and these issues can be short or long-term.

12. Pregnancy Issues and Increased Risks of Birth Defects

If you’re already pregnant or are considering becoming pregnant, think of your baby and don’t smoke. An article published by Oxford Journals warns that the toxins in tobacco can raise genetic disability risks significantly. The fetus is more likely to develop malformations and other serious prenatal conditions.

13. Anxiety and Depression

Have smokers told you that their nicotine habit relaxes their frayed nerves? One of the first things you notice when you quit is uncomfortable nicotine withdrawal. Being hooked on this toxin can eventually increase your anxiety, depression, and other mental conditions.

14. Smoking Causes Early Menopause for Some Women

When you feel the heat coming from your burning cigarette, think about experiencing hot flashes. Women who are addicted to nicotine might start menopause earlier than nonsmoking ones. Plus, you’re more likely to battle more hot flashes.

15. Immunity System Issues

People who are addicted to tobacco seem to have poorer health in general. According to an article published by the National Library of Medicine, cigarettes can suppress your immune system and make you more susceptible to disease. You’re also apt to experience more respiratory infections.

16. Higher Risks of Other Cancers

Countless cancers may be attributed to the carcinogens that smokers inhale. Among these are the cancer of the mouth, skin, lungs, and cervix. The American Cancer Society reveals that at least thirty percent of cancer deaths in America each year are from people who smoke.

17. Discolored and Brittle Fingernails

Your fingers always tell the secret of the many tale-tale signs of nicotine use. Smoke and nicotine leave unsightly yellow stains on your fingers and nails. It also makes your nails more brittle and unhealthier.

18. Increase Risk of Hypertension

Abusing tobacco products produces a negative effect on all your blood vessels. Not only does it cause plaque buildup, but it damages the vessel walls. The results can be poor circulation and an increased risk of high blood pressure.

19. Compromising the Health of Others with Secondhand Smoke

As you’re puffing on a cigarette, at least you have the dubious advantage of a filter. Those around you must inhale your smoke without a screen, which can be devastating to their health. Those who are especially vulnerable to secondhand smoke are children, seniors, pregnant mothers, and those with compromised immune systems.

20. Negative Social Effects

When you light up every day, your nose usually becomes blinded to the disgusting smell. Nasty smoke permeates your hair, breath, body, clothes, and everything you own. It can be a big turnoff in a potential love relationship and keep family and friends away.

Final Thoughts on Breaking Your Smoking Habit

Addiction is a powerful condition that can affect your entire well-being. Smoking cessation is probably one of the best decisions for you and your loved ones. Life is too precious to allow it to go up in smoke.

Doing This ONE Thing Will Make You Better In Bed

April 27, 2016 by Power of Positivity

Everyone wants to be at their best when it comes to enjoying intimacy with their partner, and new scientific research is showing that ONE simple lifestyle change can not only make you a better partner in the bed, but can also have incredible health benefits as well…

Are you willing to make this one change for you and your partner?

Making the choice to eat a vegan diet can seriously change the relationship between you and your partner’s closest moments. Here’s why…

Although they are avoiding animal proteins, the vegan diet is incredibly diverse compared to that of most meat-eaters. Vegans are more likely to have a taste palate for unusual flavors, ways of cooking food and unusual imported vegetables. Does all of this dietary open-mindedness means that vegans are also likely to be more willing to explore their sense of taste and smell in bed? It’s possible, and it certainly wouldn’t hurt to ask your vegan partner to try a taste.

Here are 5 Reasons a Vegan Lifestyle can make you a better partner…

1. Sexual potency may be higher in males who are vegans

In a study of veganism and masculinity, researchers say ‘Veganism, a diet that focuses on the exclusion of animal meat and byproducts, challenges hegemonic masculinity. Hegemonic masculinity, the concept of men attempting to live up to an ideal form of masculinity, asks men to exude power and domination, not compassion and empathy.’

The scientists also mention that previous research has shown that men, particularly older men report pursuing a vegan lifestyle for health reasons, particularly to help improve their sex drive.

2. A vegan diet increases your sex hormone

Researchers studying the blood hormone levels of vegans as compared to omnivores found that vegans had higher levels of sex hormone-binding globulin (SHBG), which helps the sex hormones to circulate in your bloodstream.

Lower cholesterol in the blood that vegan lovers have gives them better blood flow also.

3. Vegans have more energy (in bed an out!)

The same researchers who found that SHBG was higher in vegans found that actual physiological, metabolic energy is also higher in male vegans than in male omnivores. Increased stamina is also important in maintaining a healthy physical relationship with your partner.

4. Vegans have more body confidence

That low fat diet is likely to make vegans lean and physically in shape. Lean vegetable sources of protein mean lean muscles and less body fat. The look of the vegan physique is not that of a pudgy couch potato. Vegans benefit not only from a healthy diet, but also from a healthier sex life than their meat-eating friends. Even if they didn’t look hot, vegans who feel comfortable in their own skin and have body confidence appear more attractive to their partner.

Vegans also tend to have a lower BMI, lower blood cholesterol levels and they live longer. Which ultimately results in a longer lasting relationship.

5. Libido is higher for both male and female vegans

According to Mindbodygreen.com ‘Researchers have found that certain foods cause a chemical reaction in the body that increases the libido in both males and females. Foods with large levels of zinc and vitamin B complexes are said to elevate testosterone levels and boost sexual desire.’

Sexual desire is usually the first ingredient for a hot sex life, so the sex partners of vegans are definitely having more fun. Being desired by your partner is excellent for your self-esteem and mental well-being. Your vegan lover makes you feel even better about yourself. Aren’t they generous?

Need even more reasons to switch to a vegan romance? Your vegan partner likely makes more money than your meat-eating ex. Besides being good in bed, a vegan lifestyle often involves spending much more on organic groceries, specialty processed vegetarian foods, and all of the cool kitchen gadgets to cook it with.

11 Quotes To Remember When You Feel Overwhelmed

April 27, 2016 by Power of Positivity

In today’s society, it seems that many of us feel overwhelmed the majority of the time. However, in the long run, this can lead to chronic stress and major health problems, which we’d obviously want to avoid if we could help it. We might not be able to escape the stresses of everyday life, but we can learn to manage them more effectively. If you have been feeling overwhelmed lately, we hope the following quotes will help you ease your stress and remember the beauty of life even in the difficult moments.

Here are 11 quotes to remember when you feel overwhelmed:

1. “You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.” – Timber Hawkeye

When life seems like a constant rat race, remember to take time for yourself. Create a calm environment in your home and within you, so no amount of stress can pierce through the layer of tranquility you’ve created for yourself.

2. “Getting knocked down in life is a given. Getting up and moving forward is a choice.” – Zig Ziglar

We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control how we react to it. Remember that even when life knocks you down, you don’t have to stay there and let it run the show. Get up and fight back, because that is the only way you can keep going in life.

3. The less you respond to negativity, the more peaceful your life becomes.

Maybe the key to stop feeling overwhelmed lies in what you give your attention to. What you focus on expands, so remember this the next time you feel overwhelmed. You have the power to create your reality, and that starts with what you give your energy and what thoughts you allow.

4. “Take life day by day and be grateful for the little things. Don’t get stressed over what you can’t control.”

Being overwhelmed often means putting our focus in a time that isn’t the present. To avoid getting stressed, simply bring your attention back to the now. We can’t change the past and we can’t control the future, but we can do our best to create a positive experience in the present.

5. Stop stressing. Everything will be okay, just let it go.

No matter what happens in life, you can’t always control the outcome. All you can do is give it up to the universe to decide what it wants you to learn and experience.

6. Sometimes you have to stop thinking so much and just go where your heart takes you.

Oftentimes, we feel overwhelmed by trying to control our reality too much. Letting go and enjoying the process can usually alleviate any feelings of stress, because we’ve stepped back and allowed life to run its course.

7. Trust yourself. You’ve survived a lot, and you’ll survive whatever is coming.

One of the best things you can do in life is to believe in yourself. As long as you have you and your faith doesn’t waver, you can meet any challenge in life head on.

8. When something is gone; something better is coming.

Don’t focus on the past. You can learn from it, but don’t allow it to define you. The past is behind you for a reason; keep your eyes peeled for what’s in store ahead of you.

9. “Don’t give up now. Chances are your best kiss, your hardest laugh, and your greatest day are still yet to come.” – Atticus

No matter what, just keep on going. If you give up now, you won’t know the many blessings that await you in the days to come. Oftentimes, our greatest battles simply prepare us for a wonderful future.

10. We cannot start over, but we can create a new beginning.

Sometimes, you just need to hit the reset button. It’s not always about fixing what’s broken; sometimes it’s about moving on and creating a better future in a new place.

11. You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress, simultaneously.

No human is perfect; we’re constantly evolving and working on ways to better ourselves. Just embrace your strengths and keep developing your weaknesses. So you don’t have to be perfect, you just have to keep going and do whatever it takes to gain your own approval.

9 Comebacks For Dealing With Selfish People

April 27, 2016 by Power of Positivity

Selfish people can be so childish, but rather than passing judgment on them, we suggest using one or more of these 9 comebacks when you have to talk to a selfish person.

You would avoid a selfish person if you could, so most likely if you are reading this article, it means that you regularly have to deal with a selfish person who you cannot avoid. These can be your coworkers, family members or people in the community that you have to see often.

If only all humans could be open-minded, kind, and generous with our love we might have no more war, crime, or people suffering from depression and other mental illnesses. But until that unlikely day comes, let’s look at some comebacks for when you have to encounter selfish people

9 Comebacks for Dealing With Selfish People

You may recognize this article topic as a similar one that we have covered before. In fact, if you search our website for the word ‘comeback’ you will find multiple articles that we have done for handling toxic people, rude people, manipulators, and fake people.

What all of these have in common is helping you with the difficult language that can be involved when you confront someone’s behavior that you dislike. A comeback is your way of speaking up for yourself, setting boundaries for behavior that you will tolerate, and not allowing disrespect toward yourself.

Using your language this way is a powerful tool to protect yourself and show yourself love. Read our article 7 Warning Signs You’re In A Relationship With a Sociopath if you are concerned that the selfish person is your romantic partner. Selfish people can be manipulative, so protect yourself.

1. Silence is golden

Someone has just said something terribly selfish. Let their words hang in the air as you gaze at them in silence for a few, long, seconds. Pausing like this gives the selfish person a chance to hear their words again and process how you might have taken their meaning in a negative way.

Don’t leave them hanging too long, but make sure you let the silence speak your disappointment in their behavior. Your facial expression will probably already show your reaction to the selfish person’s words. Let that say all you need to say.

2. ‘That is not what is best for me.’

This statement may sound selfish, but it reflects your assessment of what the selfish people constantly ask for, and it sets a boundary that you do not want them to cross.

3. ‘It sounds like you want ___. Is that right?’

Let’s get really clear about what the selfish person is doing to you. When a selfish person talks, it is all about them.

4. ‘I would like a turn to speak when you are done.’

A selfish person can monopolize the conversation and unless you make your expectations clear, you might not be able to speak your mind.

5. ‘Let’s see if we can find a compromise.’

A selfish person wants things their way, and they aren’t really thinking about your wishes. You may need to give a little ground, but you certainly shouldn’t need to give up everything you want so that the selfish person can have things their way all the time.

6. ‘I want ___’

The selfish person got to tell you what they wanted, now be sure to tell them what you want. Be clear, be calm, be logical. Channel your inner Mr. Spock for this conversation.

7. ‘Can you see that what you want is not in my best interests?’

This approach is an attempt to get the selfish person to see your point of view. It might not work, but it doesn’t hurt to ask them to TRY to see things from your perspective.

8. ‘That doesn’t work for me. How about ___ instead?’

You’ve made it clear that you do not accept what the selfish person wants and you have stated your preference. What happens next is up to the selfish person’s ability to change their mindset.

9. ‘Let’s talk about what’s best for both of us.’

Again, trying to gain the cooperation of the selfish person will benefit both of you. Researchers studying selfishness found that when there was a choice between a purely selfish result and a result that would benefit the group, a brief discussion before making the choice resulted in people choosing the option that benefitted the group 100% of the time.

(BONUS TIP FOR HANDLING SELFISH PEOPLE) 10. ‘I value your suggestion.’

In a study of motivation and self-control, researchers say ‘the clash between selfish motives and behaviors that promote social acceptance, set the stage for the necessity of self-regulation.’ Exercising self-control when we do not get what we want by regulating our speech and behavior is difficult for a selfish person because if their idea is not automatically accepted, their self-esteem suffers.

This may be the most difficult for you to say, but politeness is always an excellent comeback for dealing with selfish people. Helping to boost the self-esteem of the other person may help you to receive cooperation from them.

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11 Quotes To Remember When You Feel Angry

1. Every day you must unlearn the ways that hold you back. You must rid yourself of negativity, so you can learn to fly. – Leon Brown

2. I knew I matured when I realized every situation doesn’t need a reaction, sometimes you just have to leave people to do the things they do.

3. A couple of years from now, everything you’re stressing about won’t even matter. Keep moving forward.

4. Put your focus into loving and creating, not gossip and hating. – Kristen Butler

5. Do not get upset with people or situations. Both are powerless without your reaction.

6. Sometimes…you have to let go to allow better things to come into your life.

7. The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present. – Barbara De Angelis

8. I don’t get mad anymore. I just accept it for what it is and move on.

9. Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

10. You can come out bitter or you can come out better. There is purpose in your pain.

11 Life-Changing Lessons From Ram Dass

1. Love isn’t found in another person; it’s found within you – it’s a state of being.

2. Ram Dass takes no experience for granted.

3. Don’t allow your mind to rule your life.

4. Cherish your relationships, but don’t allow them to define you.

5. Death is not the end.

6. Don’t take yourself for granted.

7. Allow silence into your life.

8. Be here now.

9. Don’t allow your emotions to control you.

10. Don’t try too hard.

11. Self-development never truly ends.

These Ten Things Happen When You Quit Smoking

1. Sleep Better When You Quit Smoking

2. You Smell Fresher When You Quit Smoking

3. Better Senses of Taste, Smell

4. Less Coughing and Better Lung Health

5. You Develop Your Self-control Muscle

6. Quit Smoking for More Energy

7. Your Voice Changes (for the better!)

8. You Get More Done When You Stop Smoking

9. You Have More Time and Money for Other Things

10. You Quit Hanging out in Unsafe Places

Twenty Harmful Health Consequences of Smoking

1. Smoking Can Cause Lung Diseases

2. Coronary Disease

3. Dental Issues May Arise from Smoking

4. Premature Aging Skin

5. Complications with Diabetes Type II

6. Smoking May Cause a Loss of Appetite

7. Reduced Sense of Smell and Taste

8. Cholesterol Issues

9. Smoking Can Impair Your Vision

10. Increase the Likelihood of Blood Clots

11. Infertility Issues

12. Pregnancy Issues and Increased Risks of Birth Defects

13. Anxiety and Depression

14. Smoking Causes Early Menopause for Some Women

15. Immunity System Issues

16. Higher Risks of Other Cancers

17. Discolored and Brittle Fingernails

18. Increase Risk of Hypertension

19. Compromising the Health of Others with Secondhand Smoke

20. Negative Social Effects

Final Thoughts on Breaking Your Smoking Habit

Are you willing to make this one change for you and your partner?

Here are 5 Reasons a Vegan Lifestyle can make you a better partner…

1. Sexual potency may be higher in males who are vegans

2. A vegan diet increases your sex hormone

3. Vegans have more energy (in bed an out!)

4. Vegans have more body confidence

5. Libido is higher for both male and female vegans

Here are 11 quotes to remember when you feel overwhelmed:

9 Comebacks for Dealing With Selfish People

1. Silence is golden

2. ‘That is not what is best for me.’

3. ‘It sounds like you want ___. Is that right?’

4. ‘I would like a turn to speak when you are done.’

5. ‘Let’s see if we can find a compromise.’

6. ‘I want ___’

7. ‘Can you see that what you want is not in my best interests?’

8. ‘That doesn’t work for me. How about ___ instead?’

9. ‘Let’s talk about what’s best for both of us.’

(BONUS TIP FOR HANDLING SELFISH PEOPLE) 10. ‘I value your suggestion.’

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