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5 Signs You’re In A Relationship With A Narcissist

5 Signs You’re In A Relationship With A Narcissist

After reading the definition below, I think most of us could agree that being in a relationship with a narcissist is no fun.

Narcissistic personality disorder:  a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance; a deep need for admiration and a lack of empathy for others…Behind this mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem that’s vulnerable to the slightest criticism.  – Mayo Clinic

Yeah, we wouldn’t think so either. Because we all know for a relationship to be fruitful, it has to be a true partnership – can we agree on this as well?

Exactly – and the problem is that in being in a relationship with a narcissist, there will only be one person that matters: themselves.

Here’s another thing that’s interesting: narcissism isn’t all that rare! In a study that includes a representative sample of 35,000 Americans, it was found that 1 in 16 had experienced narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) at some point in their lives. By comparison, about 1 in 100 has developed symptoms of psychosis (break with reality). About 6% of Americans experience depression, which is at about the same rate as those that are narcissistic.

Before we get into the signs that you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, it’s important to understand that we’ve all likely displayed some of these traits at one time or another. The key word in that last sentence is one time or another. Those that are textbook narcissists display this type of behavior regularly and without regret.

With that said, here are 5 signs that you’re in a relationship with a narcissist:

1. They project a false image

If you’re in a relationship with a narcissistic, you’ll notice they will use external things to display their superiority. For them, this is a necessary facade and one that is designed to cover up their “true self” – the one that feels profoundly inferior. One psychologist calls this the “trophy complex,” in which the narcissist often uses objects, people, status or accomplishments to represent the self; again substituting these things for their inadequate, “real” self. If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, here’s a few things they might say:

“My accomplishments are my life.”

“I got plastic surgery because it’s the best way to get a rich man’s attention and make other women jealous.”

“Poor people are to be avoided. I certainly don’t want to look poor, which is why I drive a luxury car.”

2. They have a grandiose personality

Ever heard the song ‘You’re So Vain’? Carly Simon sang this hit song by back in ’88 – and is a perfect song for narcissists. A couple lines:

Well I heard you went up to Saratoga and your horse naturally won

Then you flew your Lear Jet up to Nova Scotia

To see total eclipse of the sun

She’s singing (albeit, fictionally) about a man that talks about going to see his horses race, who of course won. He then supposedly flies his private jet out of country, simply to watch an eclipse. While certainly exaggeratory (funny even) for most of us, it’s not out of the realm of possibility to someone with narcissism to at least lie about doing these things in order to feel superior.

3. They only want to discuss themselves

Most conversations are a two-way street and go back and forth naturally. If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, the conversation will go quite differently. They only want to talk about themselves; and if the other person begins discussing things going on in their life, the narcissist is quick to interrupt. Those in a relationship with a narcissist will usually just let them talk, as what they have to personally say wouldn’t matter to them much anyways; either that or they’ll just ignore the narcissist completely.

Here’s what one person had to say:

“Communicating with a narcissist usually goes one of two ways. He is either doing all the talking or he isn’t responding at all. You see, either way he controls the conversation.”

4. They use manipulation to suit themselves

If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, you’ll notice that they will make unreasonable demands from those that are close to them in order to satisfy some kind of self-serving need. They will do this with parents, friends, spouses, and even children. They usually do this out of inadequacy – they feel flawed and need someone else to fill the resulting void.

In a relationship with a narcissist, your partner will often use guilt to get what they want. Guilt-tripping is a useful tool for the narcissist, as it can – often, effectively – replace any emotions that the other person has and scheme them into taking action that services their own needs.

To find out if your partner is trying to manipulate you, read more here.

5. They feel entitled to everything

In a relationship with a narcissist, your partner will often feel as if they “deserve” something that they haven’t earned. Instead of pulling up their pants and getting to work, they’ll feel that’s beneath them and insist on someone else doing it. We often see this in relationships where one person will refuse to get a job, even if they’re in a tight financial situation.

Also, if you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, he or she will often seem like a child that throws tantrums to get attention. If they’re not feeling like they’re getting enough attention, money, support, love, etc. they’ll display eccentric and selfish behavior in the attempt of getting what they want.

As a side note, it is important to understand that NPD is sometimes (sadly) not correctable. Specifically, if this disorder is a result of childhood deprivation of some sort, as this is due to developmental short-circuiting that has occurred. For the others, they will rarely seek treatment as it is more of an “I’m okay, it’s everyone else” attitude.

Either way, don’t suffer the headache and heartache that is sure to come when in a relationship with a narcissist.

9 Tips For Creating A Sacred Space

When we come home after a long day at work, we want to feel like we can truly relax and unwind. In each home, we should all have one sacred space – a place we can run to when life seems like too much to handle. Our space should make us feel welcomed and comforted like we can totally unravel ourselves and shake away all the stresses of the day behind us. It should feel like our ultimate sanctuary and reflect our true selves.

However, many people don’t spend time creating this space within their houses, so it just feels like a pit stop before the next day at work. If you want to make your house feel like a home, a place where you can relax and connect more to your inner self, read our tips below to get started.

Here are 9 tips for creating a sacred space:

1. Buy plants to put around your home.

Not only will bringing nature into your home help you relax, but house plants have other health benefits as well. A multitude of studies have shown that they can fight pollution, ward off allergies and colds, boost your mood, and even help your concentration and cognitive function. If you truly want to cultivate a sacred space, adding plants to your home will help you achieve this goal, plus, they add a nice touch of natural color to the space.

2. Keep your house clean and organized.

A sacred space can’t exist without cleanliness and organization; after all, a cluttered space will only make your mind feel more cluttered, too. Try to make your bed each day, and keep up other household chores regularly. Not only will this help you combat laziness, but it also makes you more productive and mindful of your space. A messy home only reflects the messes inside of ourselves, so keeping things tidy will help you keep your mind clear and balanced.

3. Turn off your electronic devices a few hours before bed.

Multiple studies have proven how electronic devices can hinder sleep if you use them right before bed. The bright light from phone and tablet screens actually signals to our brains to wake up, and suppresses melatonin levels in our brains. This means it will take much longer to actually fall asleep than we may have intended, resulting in feeling very tired the next day for work or school.

sleeping habits

Not to mention, using your phone or tablet for hours on end poses other health ramifications, including back and neck problems, anxiety, depression, and dangerous exposure to electromagnetic radiation. Being on electronic devices for too many hours a day can simply make us feel frazzled and disconnected, so make sure to turn off your electronics a few hours before bed, and pick up a good ol’ book instead. Also remember, you will create a much more sacred environment by tuning more into yourself than into the virtual world on your phone.

4. Create an altar with items that make you feel more connected to yourself.

Everyone connects to themselves and the universe differently, so use whatever feels right for you. Whether you feel more spiritually connected using candles, incense, crystals, or a Buddha sculpture, just make the space representative of what speaks to your soul the most. You can place the altar anywhere in your home, but make sure you choose a quiet, secluded place so you can focus on connecting with your higher self.

stress free home for sacred space

5. Light candles or burn your favorite incense.

Aromatherapy can help a variety of conditions, from anxiety to insomnia to physical pain. You can include candles and incense as part of your altar, or just have them separate somewhere in your room. Relaxing smells can help you feel more peaceful mentally, emotionally, and physically, and just the sight of burning candles can bring a sense of calmness to you. If you don’t want to burn candles or light incense, you can use a diffuser instead, which will give you all the benefits of the fragrances without the carcinogens.

Light candles to create a sacred space

6. Play relaxing music when you get home from work.

A surefire way to create a more mindful environment is by playing calming music throughout your home. Relaxing is relative, so just choose whatever sends you into a state of pure bliss. This will help you to slow down your thoughts, and find the sanctuary within your mind. Music can certainly heal, so find whatever resonates with your soul, and allow the sounds to permeate your home and remove any negative energy.

Relaxing music for brain - sacred space

7. Allow plenty of sunlight into your home.

Humans need sunlight to survive – it gives us Vitamin D, boosts our mood, keeps us warm, and so much more. Many people don’t get near enough sun exposure, and of course, getting it directly is best, but simply opening the blinds to allow more light in can do wonders for the energy inside your home. The sun gives us life, so naturally, you’ll feel more alive by allowing more natural light inside.

8. Paint your walls calming colors.

Try light blue, cream, light gray, pale yellow, deep red, or a soft yellow-green. In general, the colors in nature work best to create a relaxing, sacred space in the home, so you can never go wrong with choosing earthy colors for your wall color.

9. Set aside a space for yoga or meditation.

Yoga and meditation have countless health benefits, so doing some sort of exercise that promotes both inner and outer wellness can raise both your energy as well as the energy of the space you occupy. Choose a space that has enough room for you to move comfortably, but also, make sure you can get enough quiet time here so that you can fully immerse yourself in the practice.

Study Proves Experiences, Not Things, Make People Happy

Happiness – does it come from the memories you make or the possessions you accumulate? While many people already know the answer to this, a surprising number still run out to buy the latest and greatest gadgets and clothing. They hope these purchases will make them happy.

Study Proves Experiences, Not Things, Bring Satisfaction to People

Economists believe that people spend their disposable income on things rather than experiences because they view the objects as having a higher perceived value since they will last longer. Logically, this makes sense – an experience lasts a relatively short amount of time compared to the object, so of course, most people would instead put their hard-earned dollars into something that will give them value for a more extended period.

However, a new study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology finally proves that experiences make people happy rather than things, which throws all of that flawed logic out the window. While we might perceive the material object as having more value since it’s tangible and usable, we will inevitably adapt to the possession over time. Therefore, its value decreases.

On the other hand, we might not immediately recognize the value of an experience we have. But upon looking back on it and reminiscing over the memories we made, it becomes a part of us. We can relate more to others who have similar experiences than a similar car or flatscreen TV.

happyIn the study referenced above, San Francisco State Associate Professor of Psychology Ryan Howell surveyed people before and after purchasing. He came to this conclusion:

“Prior to the purchase, respondents said they believed a life experience would make them happier but a material item would be a better use of their money. After the purchase, however, respondents reported that life experiences not only made them happier but were also the better value.”

When you think about the conversations you have with people, what do you remember bonding over? The new iPhone you just bought or the trips you have been on in your lives built your character and changed your whole outlook on life?

Dr. Thomas Gilovich, a psychology professor at Cornell University, explains why we feel happy about having experiences rather than purchasing more things we don’t need:

“Our experiences are a bigger part of ourselves than our material goods.You can really like your material stuff. You can even think that part of your identity is connected to those things, but nonetheless they remain separate from you. In contrast, your experiences really are part of you. We are the sum total of our experiences.”

At the end of our lives, we won’t look back on how many cars or homes we purchased, how much money we had left in our bank, or what size TV we had. Instead, we will think back on the people who touched our hearts, who we got to share invaluable experiences with that changed us forever, and the beautiful places on this Earth we got to explore with them.

It might seem tempting to compare yourself to others who seem to have more material items than you and feel jealous of them. But remember that you don’t own the stuff. In fact, it ends up owning you. Furthermore, any big-ticket item you buy means lots of debt you’ll have to pay back, which equates to added stress and strained finances. Finally, of course, an experience can cost a lot if you choose, but at least you will have made memories and possibly new friends in the process.

happiness memeFinal Thoughts on Being Happy With Fewer Things

In short, material objects build our egos, but experiences develop our character. So which one sounds more critical and more likely to make you happy?

The next time you get paid, consciously think about where you’d like your money to go before you blow it all on a big-ticket item that will sit in your house and lose value. Instead, an experience will sit in your heart for years to come, making you feel more connected to yourself and others. Most importantly, you will feel happy. We all deserve happiness, and now that we can prove where it comes from, hopefully, more people will rush out to buy a skydiving session or excursions in foreign countries or an art class they’ve always wanted to take.

Remember, you don’t get to go back in time and redo the choices you made. So commit to living in the present and doing things that genuinely make you happy.

8 Signs Your Partner Is Trying to Control You

When did this relationship go from being a loving romance to an emotionally draining combat zone? If you’re wondering how to escape from the toxic partner that you’re with, it could be a sign that your partner is trying to control and maybe even command your relationship. Here are some red flags to look out for.

8 Warning Signs Your Partner Is Trying to Control You

Do you spot any of these signs of a controlling loved one? If so, it might be time to examine the relationship more carefully.

1. They put conditions on their love.

Your partner should give love effortlessly without making rules about whether or not you deserve their affection. When someone uses language like “If you’d only act differently, I could love you,” they are putting a limit on their love.

In a healthy relationship, your partner would recognize that we are all working on becoming better people, and although you may have things that you want to change about yourself, they love you just the same.

control2. They restrict your interactions with others.

When your partner limits who, when, or where you can talk to other people, they are trying to control you in an unhealthy way. You should have the freedom to have an active social life without being made to feel guilty for talking to others, whether they be of the same or opposite sex.

Healthy partnerships allow each person the freedom to grow and develop within the boundaries of a supportive relationship. Restricting your social interaction is a sign of an insecure partner who wants to control you.

3. They manipulate your emotions.

Your partner is trying to control you if they try to make you feel guilty, anxious, jealous, afraid, or depressed. Although you control your emotions and how you respond to someone’s actions or words, a manipulative person will act in ways that attempt to elicit these negative emotions from you.

A manipulator can be very good at hiding their tactics. You can read more about how to recognize a manipulator here.

4. They have trust issues.

In a study of couples who experienced a significant conflict, those who felt less secure in their relationships perceived more conflict with their dating partners and reported a tendency for conflicts to escalate in severity. An insecure partner can quickly make an argument go from a minor one to an intense one.

If you haven’t given your partner any reason to not trust you, but they spy on you or check your phone and computer when you aren’t looking, they are attempting to control your level of privacy.

Your partner may make assumptions about who you spend time with and make accusations about your unfaithful behavior, even if they do not have any reason to suspect it. The only way this type of controlling person feels comfortable is when they know what you are doing at all times.

Don’t let someone control your actions. A healthy partnership has a foundation of trust and honesty. If you or your partner cannot trust each other, the relationship may be unable to survive.

5. They put you down.

There are healthy ways to disagree with your partner. Use of language that is belittling or insulting is uncalled for, even during an argument. The use of hurtful language to each other is a sign that your partner wants to control you by keeping you in a negative emotional state.

6. They are hostile toward you.

Signs of extreme anger, violent actions, threats of violence, threats of punishment, or violent sex are all very concerning signs in a relationship. For the sake of your safety, get to a safe location immediately. A person who uses physical violence to control another person is dangerous to themselves and others.

According to the National Violence Against Women Survey, the lifetime prevalence of physical assault by a partner was 22.1% for women and 7.4% for men. You can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE (7233) and speak confidentially to someone 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

7. You feel emotionally drained.

When you notice that feelings of sadness, depression, or thoughts of being trapped in this controlling relationship have been happening to you, it’s time to seek help or exit the relationship.

A healthy partnership should make you feel safe, secure, happy, and emotionally fulfilled most of the time. All couples will experience conflict and times of sadness, but those should be less frequent.

toxic partner8. You have low self-esteem.

Suppose you take your partner’s actions or words personally and have begun to feel like you are less critical as a person than you were before the relationship started. In that case, that is a sign that you’re in a controlling relationship.

When you notice that you have changed, but it’s not for the better, your mental well-being is at stake. If this is the wrong relationship for you, make a change now for your health and happiness.

The ONE Thing That May Be Causing Your Back Pain

What if that backache pain that you feel is easily fixed by increasing your intake of one vitamin? You may not realize it, but it’s easy to mistake lower back pain as a sign of an injury. Joint pain can also mimic symptoms of this vitamin deficiency.

In the winter, most of the northern hemisphere gets less sun than it will during the Spring, Summer and Fall. The temperatures are also lower, so we cover up and stay inside our heated homes and workplaces as much as possible.

As a result, we leave our homes bundled up, get into our transportation, enter our workplaces, and return home having rarely had any skin exposed to the sun. We lose the benefit of direct sunlight on exposed skin which produces our Vitamin D quota for the day.

We have been told that skin cancer is such a high risk that we should cover up or apply sunscreen to any exposed skin. But it that really necessary? The risk of sunscreen versus the benefit of naturally absorbed Vitamin D in one health decision where we tend to err on the side of caution.

Since we would rather avoid skin cancer from too much ultraviolet radiation from the sun, we lose the benefit of Vitamin D that natural sunlight provides.

This Common Vitamin Deficiency Causes Back and Joint Pain

When we lack adequate Vitamin D, we reduce our body’s ability to absorb calcium which strengthens our bones. Something as correctible as a Vitamin D deficiency can cause back and joint pain to such a degree that we might seek the help of a medical professional.

Thai massage pain

Pain and Vitamin deficiency

In a study of 360 patients (90% women and 10% men) who reported lower back pain and visited a spinal and internal medicine clinic over a 6-year period, 83% of the study patients had an abnormally low level of vitamin D.

These were patients, ages 15 to 52, who had low back pain with no obvious cause for longer than 6 months. After treatment with Vitamin D supplements, measurable improvement in symptoms was seen in all the groups that had a low level of vitamin D, and in 95% of all the patients.

Bone and joint pain as a result of Vitamin D deficiency

Vitamin D is important for the absorption of dietary calcium. When someone is deficient in vitamin D, the amount of calcium absorbed is less than what is needed to satisfy the body’s calcium requirement. This results in an increase in the production of parathyroid hormone (PTH). Parathyroid hormone conserves calcium by increasing the reabsorption of calcium by the kidneys. The kidneys then produce a hormonally active form of vitamin D.

When we are deficient in vitamin D, not of the hormonally active form of Vitamin D is produced to maintain calcium absorption. When this happens, the skeleton becomes the source of calcium for the body. This results in osteopenia and osteoporosis.

When we lack enough Vitamin C to properly mineralize our bones and help them be solid, there is an effect of outward pressure on the membrane that covers our bones which has sensory pain fibers. This explains why patients with a Vitamin D deficiency often experience dull. aching pain in their bones.

Many patients with this general bone pain are misdiagnosed by their doctors as having fibromyalgia. The symptom of generalized whole-body bone and joint pain as a result of vitamin deficiency is easily correctible.

In a study of women undergoing treatment for breast cancer, one of the typical treatments (with aromatase inhibitors) led to reports of severe joint pain to the point that the women felt disabled. Supplementing with 50,000 units of Vitamin D per week reduced the frequency of women reporting this severe joint pain.

Prevention of back and joint pain from Vitamin D deficiency

The amount of sun exposure needed to correct this deficiency in Vitamin D is minimal. It is estimated that as little as 10 minutes in the sun, with skin exposed on the face, arms, and legs is enough for a fair-skinned person in the summer months to produce 10,000 units of Vitamin D.

However, if you live north of Atlanta, GA in the winter, you aren’t getting enough sunlight. Darker-skinned people are less able to absorb UVB radiation from the sun which is required to produce Vitamin D. Elderly people are also at higher risk for Vitamin D deficiency.

Treatment of Vitamin D deficiency

A Vitamin D deficiency can be treated easily by giving the patient a dose of 50,000 units of vitamin D once a week for 8 weeks. Long-term treatment of vitamin D deficiency can be accomplished by giving 50,000 units of vitamin D once or twice a month.

Many of our grocery items are fortified with additional Vitamin D. Adding a supplement in the winter of 2,000 units per day may be required to maintain bone and joint health.

pain

8 Ways to Increase Your Vitamin D (and Avoid Pain)

If a vitamin D deficiency causes your back pain or discomfort, there are things you can do to alleviate it. Increasing your Vitamin D intake can make all the difference, and it’s easier than you think.

1. Eat Egg Yolks

Egg yolks are a great source of Vitamin D, and they’re easy to add to your diet. Try to get your eggs from pasture-raised or free-range chickens. They offer up to 15% more of your recommended daily intake of Vitamin D than eggs from a conventionally raised chicken.

If you can find chickens that eat vitamin D enriched grain, their eggs could offer over 100% of your recommended daily intake. However, no matter where you get your eggs, you’re sure to consume more vitamin D than if you didn’t eat egg yolks.

2. Eat Mushrooms

Mushrooms make vitamin D when exposed to UV light, making them a beneficial source to add to your diet. Mushrooms produce D2 or ergocalciferol vitamin D, and humans produce D3 or cholecalciferol. While D3 is more beneficial, both types raise levels in your body.

The Vitamin D content varies for different mushroom types, but wild maitake mushrooms tend to have the highest amount. They provide nearly 300% of your recommended daily intake, ensuring you reach your goal. If you can’t find wild mushrooms, you can typically buy mushrooms treated with UV light.

3. Spend Some Time in the Sun

The sun is one of the best sources of vitamin D, so get outside as often as you can. Your skin contains a type of cholesterol that turns to vitamin D upon exposure to the sun. Research shows that vitamin D derived from the sun stays in your body twice as long as that from food sources or supplements.

If you have darker skin, you’ll have to spend more time outside to produce the vitamin D. Darker skin has more melanin, making vitamin D production harder. Age impacts vitamin D production, as well, because it becomes less efficient as you get older.

Additionally, your proximity to the equator makes a difference in vitamin D production. The closer you live to the equator, the more time of the year you’ll be able to bask in the benefits of sunshine. If you live close to it, you’ll have year-round proximity, but living further away means you’ll only reap the benefits part of the year.

When you spend time in the sun, don’t forget to protect yourself with sunscreen. However, some types of sunscreens can hinder the production of vitamin D. Experts say that you can spend 8-15 minutes in the sun without protection to ensure you receive the vitamins.

4. Eat Foods Fortified with Vitamin D

There aren’t many foods that naturally contain sufficient amounts of vitamin D. Some foods are fortified with the nutrient, making it easier to find it in food sources. Some common fortified foods include:

  • Orange juice
  • Milk, including cow’s, soy, almond, and hemp
  • Cereal
  • Yogurt
  • Tofu

Be sure you read the ingredients list to ensure it’s a fortified product. Many options will make it clear on the front of the container, but you might have to look a little harder for others.

5. Sit by a Window

If you sit near an open window, you can receive the benefit of the sun without going outside. The window must be open as many windows block the kind of sunlight you need. If you work from home, move your desk near a window. Otherwise, place your favorite chair near a window you can open and sit in it whenever the sun shines through.

6. Eat Seafood and Fatty Fish

Seafood and fatty fish contain up to 50% of your recommended daily intake of Vitamin D. As one of the richest natural sources of vitamin D, these foods are a great addition to your diet. The amount of nutrients you receive in the food depends on the type and species, but they’re all beneficial.

Some types of seafood and fatty fish that contain vitamin D include:

  • Oysters
  • Shrimp
  • Tuna
  • Sardines
  • Mackerel
  • Anchovies
  • Cod

Additionally, cod liver oil is a good option for taking in more Vitamin D. It contains high amounts of the nutrient, and you can consume it with warm water or by taking a capsule.

7. Use a UV Lamp

You can invest in a lamp that emits UV-B radiation, boosting your vitamin D levels. Exposure to this radiation triggers your skin to produce vitamin D just like it would in sunlight. If you live far from the equator, you could benefit from having a year-round option.

Using a UV lamp comes with some concerns, so you must be careful. Too much exposure can cause sunburn, so don’t use it for more than 15 minutes at a time.

8. Take Supplements to Decrease Pain

Sometimes it’s best to take a vitamin D supplement to reach your recommended daily intake. Look for a high-quality supplement that contains vitamin D3 or cholecalciferol for the best results. However, if you don’t want supplements from animal sources, you might want to choose D2 instead.

Your supplements should be tested for purity and quality, and the United States doesn’t require this of all products. Make sure you take the time to choose the best and safest supplements.

pain

5 Other Ways to Decrease Back Pain Without Medicine

Increasing your vitamin D intake isn’t the only way to decrease back discomfort. There are many other natural remedies to soothe your discomfort without taking medication.

1. Reduce Pain by Sleeping in a Comfortable Bed

Research shows that your back won’t hurt as much during the day when you get enough sleep at night. Restorative sleep has healing benefits that leave you feeling refreshed. Sleep disturbances can cause or worsen your discomfort, and a lack of sleep affects your pain tolerance.

According to the CDC, adults should get between seven and nine hours of sleep each night. If you can’t seem to reach that goal, find some ways to get more sleep, including implementing a routine.

Your mattress or pillows can affect your sleep, so make sure they’re comfortable. Choose pillows that are the right size, allowing your back and neck to align. If you sleep on your side, you should also place a pillow between your knees to ensure bodily alignment.

2. Stretch or Do Yoga to Relieve Pain

Stretching your joints and soft tissues can effectively alleviate your back pain. Simple stretches such as touching your toes can help loosen your back muscles. Additionally, doing yoga is a beneficial way to stretch, and there are many poses you can try.

It stretches your back, improves your muscle and joint health, and distributes healing nutrients throughout your body. When you start doing yoga, stretch your body slowly and stop if you experience any discomfort. Do it in the morning to loosen your spine, reduce stiffness, and alleviate aches in your back.

3. Wear Different Shoes

Shoes that don’t fit properly or offer no support could lead to back pain as it causes muscle strain. High heels throw off your alignment, causing lower back discomfort. If you frequently wear them for long periods, it might be best if you find a more practical option.

Flat shoes with no support can also cause feet and back strain, leading to back pain. Instead, choose shoes that fit well and offer support.

4. Use Heating Pads and Cold Packs

Alternating heat and cold can effectively alleviate back pain. Ice packs are best after an injury or muscle strain. Wrap a towel around your ice pack for protection before applying it to your skin.

Cold packs can reduce inflammation and can provide a numbing effect for discomfort. If you don’t have a cold pack, you can use frozen vegetables, but don’t forget to cover them to protect yourself. Leave the ice on your back for no more than twenty minutes at a time.

A heating pad alleviates pain from stiff or aching muscles. Ensure the temperate is comfortable because some heating pads can get too hot.

If you don’t have a heating pad, a hot water bottle will do the trick. You can also fill a cloth bag with uncooked rice and heat it in the microwave. Additionally, you can use self-activating heat patches to get relief at work or anywhere else you can’t easily use a heat pack.

5. Avoid Pain That Comes From Sitting in the Same Position for Too Long

Avoid excessively sitting for long durations to prevent stress on the muscles and joints of your hip and spine. If you work at a desk, consider using a standing desk part of the day. Otherwise, get up and walk around every hour to alleviate the load on your spinal discs.

Additionally, check your posture throughout the day and adjust your body. Your neck, shoulder, and back should align to prevent or alleviate back pain.

You should also rotate activities often to give your muscles and joints a break. When you use different parts of your body, it prevents certain areas from being over-fatigued. Let your muscles and joints relax before returning to the previous activity.

shoulder pain

Final Thoughts on Decreasing Pain by Increasing Your Vitamin D

Back pain is a struggle and can be debilitating. Determining the cause and finding ways to alleviate the discomfort can make all the difference in your life. Increase your vitamin D intake, and you’ll notice a quick improvement in how you feel. Additionally, try some other tips to alleviate and prevent back pain.

5 Things People With Anxiety Need You To Know

Unfortunately, many people in the U.S. and worldwide suffer from some sort of anxiety disorder. In the U.S. alone, approximately 18.1% of people age eighteen and older have anxiety, which equates to about 40 million people. If you have never had anxiety, you may not understand what people who do suffer from it go through on a daily basis. This mental health disorder can affect every aspect of someone’s life, and treatment doesn’t totally eliminate the symptoms, in some cases.

People with anxiety can often feel very alienated and misunderstood, as the percentage of the population without anxiety often make incorrect assumptions about them.

Here are five things people with anxiety need you to know:

Understanding these points can help you understand people who struggle with this disorder a little better.

anxiety1. The symptoms of anxiety affect us both mentally and physically.

Anxiety doesn’t just affect our brains and the way we process the world around us – we can actually feel physical symptoms from the disorder. This mental health disorder occurs due to a combination of genetics, personality, environment, diet, and chemical imbalances in the brain. All of these factors can make anxiety feel like a burden on the physical body, and can induce headaches, cold sweats, flushing of the face, insomnia, stiff muscles, and more.

Mentally, anxiety causes us to obsess over small things, and fixate on certain situations. We try to manage our anxiety as best we can, but many of us suffer silently because we think others won’t understand.

2. We might also suffer from depression.

According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, about one-half of people with an anxiety disorder also suffer from depression. Having both of these disorders feels like being pulled in two different directions, to explain it simply. Anxiety makes us feel like we want to do everything at once, and depression makes us not want to do anything. Managing both of these disorders can feel completely overwhelming at times, and according to the Mayo Clinic, anxiety often occurs as a symptom of depression.

3. We aren’t antisocial – we just need time alone sometimes.

Anxiety can make it difficult for us to leave the house some days. So if we cancel plans on you at the last minute sometimes, don’t take it the wrong way. We actually love people, but being around others can actually exacerbate our symptoms and increase the anxiety we already feel. Of course, those who suffer from social anxiety tend to have the hardest time socializing with others, but even those with panic disorder and generalized anxiety disorder can feel anxious in social situations.

If we do go out with others, we prefer a quiet, intimate environment over a loud, crowded one.

4. Anxiety doesn’t make us weak or decrease our value in any way.

Many people label those with mental disorders as somehow less valuable or less of a person. But this stigma surrounding mental illness needs to be addressed and put to rest.

People with mental disorders have simply been too strong for too long, and anxiety and depression can occur as a result. Genetics play a part as well. However, people often can’t help what situations they grow up with and how experiences shape them. We acknowledge that overcoming anxiety, depression, and other mental disorders begins with us, but overcoming them takes time, and great effort.

Maybe because people can’t actually see our pain and suffering, they dismiss these disorders as psychosomatic and overstated. However, we go about our lives even with our mental imbalances, making us fighters, warriors, and survivors. Trying to overcome our minds and live happy, healthy lives once again makes us even more valuable, in our opinion.

people in therapy5. We don’t say we have anxiety just to get attention.

People who don’t suffer from mental problems often say that those who do just want attention and people to feel sorry for them. This couldn’t be further from the truth – people with anxiety want love and understanding, not attention. We don’t claim a mental disorder just to put on a show and have people throw us a pity party. In fact, we have real symptoms that can often be debilitating. We just want to live normal lives, but struggle to figure out how. It often feels as if our brains are on attack against us, and we have to fight back just to keep up with our everyday lives.

Anxiety feels like an ongoing battle, a constant war zone. We try everything we can to feel balanced and at peace with ourselves, but we may not ever totally get over anxiety – we can just learn to manage it. So, if you know someone with anxiety, give them compassion and a shoulder to cry on if they need it.

Often, people with anxiety have a higher sensitivity to energies than others. Therefore, they have a harder time processing our increasingly chaotic and stressed out world. Everyone struggles with something, so don’t condemn those who happen to have anxiety. They don’t want the disorder, but they have to learn how to live with it and overcome it anyway. And this makes them some of the strongest people you will ever come across.

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