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Counselor Reveals Four Toxic Behaviors That Ruin Relationships

Counselor Reveals Four Toxic Behaviors That Ruin Relationships

No matter how hard you try to function as a perfectly reasonable and stable human, you are bound to express certain toxic behaviors. And that doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s just that emotions govern people, and it can be hard to be rational. Especially when it comes to romantic relationships, which are arguably the connections that require the most emotional effort.

Not to mention that people are never taught how to have healthy relationships. The divorce rate is the highest it’s ever been, meaning most people come from broken homes. So, they have probably never had an example of how a relationship should look like. Even if your parents had a great relationship, it’s not like anyone gave you a crash course on dating.

When you eventually enter a relationship, you are bound to make mistakes. Maybe you and your partner are both great people. But that doesn’t mean you won’t sometimes bring out the worst in each other. Besides that, the world is individualistic. And it’s good to have your best interests in mind when it comes to career and things like that. But in a relationship, you also need to consider your partner’s needs and wants.

Still, that’s sometimes easier said than done. So, most toxic behaviors in relationships are tied to that in one way or another. Plus, it can be hard enough to process your own emotions. Understanding and considering someone else’s feelings can be almost impossible, given that people aren’t even taught how to take care of their own.

But if you display any of these behaviors, don’t panic. Your relationship is not doomed, nor are you a bad person for making mistakes. You need to understand what these toxic behaviors are so you can stop using them.

Four Toxic Behaviors That Ruin Relationships

toxic behaviors

1.      Criticism

Criticism can be a hard thing to get right. People don’t know how to phrase their suggestions in a way that helps others. But that’s not the only issue. In relationships, it’s not just how you express your criticism that creates problems between the partners. It’s that criticism is often used as a way to belittle others or to show your superiority over them.

You might hard it find to believe it, but it’s something that happens way more than you might think. And it’s a tactic that you have likely engaged in. This toxic behavior doesn’t have to come from malice. It’s simply a bad defense mechanism. When a couple fights, it can quickly turn into a power struggle. Which is why you might feel the need to prove your superiority. If you succeed, you can technically “win” the fight.

Winning Is Satisfying

Even though there are no winners in such fights, most people seem to believe differently. And they get satisfaction from proving their partner wrong. That’s when destructive criticism is used as a means to an end. But, a situation that’s even more common is where one partner is held accountable for something they did. The mistake many people make is that they start spewing criticism to take the heat of their own mistake and spin it on their partner.

Not to mention that sometimes, people throw around criticisms just for the sake of it. So, if you struggle with something like this in a relationship, you must make some changes. No matter how much instant gratification this behavior might bring you at that moment, it will just ruin your relationship. You don’t need to stop voicing pertinent criticisms.

But you need to learn how to make it constructive. Don’t just throw around all your issues with your partner and storm off afterward. Instead, explain why you have a certain issue and talk it through. You have to discuss the issue and allow your partner to present their perspective so you can reach a solution.

2.      Defensiveness

When it comes to toxic behaviors, defensiveness might be the most common. But it’s also the hardest to spot. Most people don’t understand why this harms a relationship. You must realize that being defensive can impede healthy communication between you and your partner.

When you can’t properly communicate, you can’t solve your issues. These issues will eventually build up, and it’ll be too late to solve them. It’s a natural emotional response to get defensive. But just because it’s natural doesn’t mean it’s good. Defensiveness often happens when people fight. In the heat of the moment, logic seems to be thrown out the window. Instead, there’s a high likelihood you’ll feel cornered and like you need to defend your position.

Also, people sometimes find it hard to take accountability for their actions. Instead of understanding that taking responsibility is the best step, they just feel like it’ll somehow come back to bite them. This toxic behavior often stems from childhood trauma. As you know, most kids aren’t taught how to take accountability and fix mistakes. Instead, they get punished if they have even the slightest slip-up.

So, this kind of behavior often affects all the relationships they will have as adults. So, if you get too defensive, you need to share this issue with your partner to work out why this happens. Maybe it’s because of trauma or because you don’t know how to be accountable for your actions. But you can work through these issues with your partner’s help.

relationships

3.      Stonewalling

As you’ve probably picked up by now, most toxic behaviors stem from childhood trauma. And this is often the case with stonewalling. You might not be familiar with the term, but you have undoubtedly experienced the behavior. Stonewalling is one’s refusal to communicate or express emotions. But, again, this is often done as a response to a fight.

And it happens because most people weren’t encouraged to communicate as kids. They would get chastised for doing something and be told to go to their room as a punishment. Or, they would be ignored when they tried to talk to their parents about something. So, it seemed like a better idea for many kids to give their parents the silent treatment.

Or maybe they were given it. All these things eventually led to the kid developing the habit of stonewalling others. When you stonewall your partner, not only do you not solve the issue you were arguing about, but you also shut them out. You make them feel like you don’t care enough to let them in.

Plus, no one wants to spend hours and hours trying to convince someone to talk about what they think and feel. It can be frustrating not knowing what your partner thinks after a fight. So, this behavior is likely to affect the relationship so badly that it can end it.

Introspecting is Key

If this is something you do, you first need to introspect and understand your own emotions. Many people don’t share because they can’t process their feelings. It’s okay to take some time to think, but don’t completely shut your partner out. And don’t use stonewalling to get back at your partner.

The fights you have also affect them, and they deserve the opportunity to have a normal conversation with you so that you can fix things. Plus, they also have things they want to share with you. Remember that communicating is crucial because that’s the only way to understand what the other is going through. And a healthy relationship is one in which you take into account your partner’s feelings and needs, and they do the same for you.

4.      Contempt

You might find it hard to believe anyone could feel contempt towards their partner. After all, they are supposedly the person you love the most. But everyone goes through rough patches in relationships and can sometimes feel negative emotions towards their partner. And contempt is one of the emotions that most often becomes toxic. This one might be the most dangerous when it comes to toxic behaviors because it can even lead to you hating your partner.

On the surface, contempt comes from a feeling of superiority. But the real reason people develop this behavior is that, deep down, they feel unappreciated. They might also believe their feelings and needs aren’t acknowledged by their partner. Often, people don’t realize they are developing all these negative feelings.

That makes it so that they don’t even notice how it affects their interactions with their partner. Contempt doesn’t only have to be verbal, though sarcastic comments that mock the other are common. It can also take a non-verbal form through chuckles, eye rolls, and mocking facial expressions. These non-verbal cues are things that people don’t even realize they are doing unless someone points them out.

Dr. John Gottman, who researched all four toxic behaviors, states that contempt is arguably the behavior that affects a relationship the most. If these negative feelings are left unaddressed, there might be no going back for a couple. So, to avoid destroying your relationship because of contempt, you should let your partner know that you feel your needs aren’t respected. And you should work towards voicing your negative feelings rather than bottling them and acting like you’re superior.

toxic behaviors

Final Thoughts on Four Toxic Behaviours That Ruin Relationships

As these toxic behaviors are sometimes called, the four horsemen of the apocalypse pose one of the most dangerous threats to a relationship. And the people who engage in these behaviors often don’t even realize what they are doing. So, if you notice that your relationship is unstable, it might be because of one or more of these behaviors.

Criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, and contempt are the four toxic behaviors you need to look out for. They often stem from one’s insecurities and a lack of healthy communication in a relationship. While you need to address each behavior differently, one thing is sure. You and your partner need to work as a team to overcome the damage they have done to your relationship.

Be The Woman Who Doesn’t Seek Validation

Women have historically learned to seek validation from society, especially men, to have a fulfilled life. But this is the remains of thousands of years of misogynistic tradition that created a gender-based hierarchy. It makes sense that women don’t feel confident enough without the approval of others since it’s been a few decades since the enactment of equal rights, at least on paper.

But what’s on paper doesn’t always translate to real life. For example, just because women can legally hold positions of power doesn’t mean it always happens. And this is just one example of the things women cannot achieve as easily as men. Not to mention that men still describe women in somewhat demeaning adjectives, especially in the workplace.

There have been many instances where others considered women too emotional for managerial positions. It wouldn’t be hard to bet that you’ve never heard a man being called emotional, especially not in a demeaning way. Unfortunately, the environment is one in which women learn that they can’t be successful without a man.

Or that they can’t trust in their abilities unless someone else validates them. So, women seek everyone’s approval, from co-workers to partners, friends, and parents. Maybe this doesn’t seem like such a bad thing. After all, all people are hardwired to want the approval of those around them. But the difference is that women are taught to seek it.

They learn that they need it and that something’s wrong if they are not actively seeking it. It can even make women feel they must knock their dreams down a notch. So, what can you do to become a woman who doesn’t seek validation?

5 Ways to Become the Woman Who Doesn’t Seek Validation

validation

1.      Understand What Your Worth Is

Many women aren’t taught how to value their own worth. And that’s because society still holds on to the dated idea that women should be feminine, dainty, and pretty. Many young girls learn that their value only rests in their looks and nothing more. Young girls aren’t often called smart and encouraged to become scientists or anything like that.

They are called pretty and dressed up as princesses. So, if that’s the environment you grew up in, you’ll likely become a woman who doesn’t understand their worth. And you’re likely to feel good when you get validation from other people. What you need to understand is that your worth is not tied to your looks or anything else for that matter.

Everyone deserves a good life and to be loved without looking like a supermodel or a billionaire. So, your worth is tied to what you value and want to achieve, and no one has the right to tell you your values are wrong. If you want to create connections and be with people, then it’s enough to focus on being close to people.

If you want a successful career, you should focus on that. Your worth comes from chasing your dreams and being a good person. Ultimately, the only validation you need is your own.

2.      Acknowledge Your Successes and Strengths

Many women are taught that they are egoistic and self-centered if they cheer themselves on. But being modest doesn’t mean you should never acknowledge when you are making progress and doing well for yourself. But it can even be that girls are taught they don’t have strengths or that their successes don’t matter. No matter what people tell you, you can succeed even if others don’t acknowledge it. And you don’t need approval from anyone.

As a woman, you might learn you only have strengths tied to your physical aspects, as discussed above. And, if you try to show your intellectual strengths, those might not be approved by others. Even if it’s nice to have people cheering you on, you are the one who knows yourself best. You are the only one who can decide what your strengths are.

And once you identify them, you can use them to your advantage. You can enhance them and use them to boost whatever area of your life you want, whether that’s work, social life, or anything else. And the best way to get validation is not through listening to what others are saying about you. Instead, it’s through seeing how you progress and become a better version of yourself as days pass.

3.      Practice Self-Care and Focus on Yourself

Validation is something that you’d much rather have come from within. But, if you sit around waiting for other people to complement and support you, you might be waiting for a long time. And, especially as a woman, it’s best to focus on yourself and not let other people tear you down.

Because if you allow yourself to be influenced by other people, you’ll never be truly fulfilled. You might hear some words of approval, but they will always come accompanied by insults or people tearing you down in one way or another. So instead, become that woman who is focused on bettering herself.

Self-care isn’t just something people do for fun or because they are high-maintenance. It’s been proven that it has many psychological benefits. It’s something relaxing and rewarding. But, most importantly, taking that time to be alone and care for yourself also allows you time for introspection. It’s not just about putting on a face mask. It’s about being alone for a couple of hours and focusing entirely on yourself without distractions.

But that’s not the only thing you can do to focus on yourself. You can also work to achieve your dreams, start whatever hobbies attract you, and hang with the people who make you happy. Seeing how you progress and become better every day will mean more to you than someone’s words.

approval

4.      Learn How to Love Yourself Without the Validation of Others

Everyone struggles with loving and accepting themselves just the way they are. But this issue is more prominent when it comes to women. Again, this goes back to the way girls are raised and the fact that they are taught that their worth is tied to superficial aspects such as looks. But self-love is something that you can learn to incorporate into your life.

And it’s a way to achieve the validation you need instead of seeking the approval of others. One of the things you need to do is to stop comparing yourself to others. You are on your own path, and there’s nothing you owe anything to. If you are working on yourself and trying to be happy, that’s more than enough. Plus, you need to remember that you are allowed to make mistakes.

Even if other people might call you out on those mistakes, don’t listen to them. Those opinions don’t matter. Sure, it’s essential to listen to constructive criticism. But if people tear you down, that’s an opinion that you shouldn’t even listen to. Self-love is about putting yourself first and being kind to yourself even if you fail or stumble. Instead, you need to focus on growth and achieving your goals.

5.      Practice Self-Confidence Instead of Seeking Validation

Some people are naturally more confident than others. But the environment is potentially the factor that influences your confidence the most. Parents often teach girls to be quiet and submissive. So, many of them grow up struggling to be confident. As a result, they are often quiet and try to blend in the background.

And the only time they get close to being confident is when they get external validation. Sure, this is not the case for all women. But the feeling of having to rely on others’ approval is something almost all women can relate to. And you can stop feeling the need to have external validation by becoming self-confident.

Self-confidence is about trusting your abilities to control your life even when things don’t seem to be going your way. It often stems from doing things that can help improve how you see yourself. You won’t be able to wake up one day and suddenly become confident. But, by taking the time to work on yourself, you’ll start being more and more self-assured.

But, besides practicing self-care, working out, eating better, and focusing on your goals, you also need to practice positive self-talk. When negative thoughts start creeping in, you need to reframe them. If you think that no one will listen to you in a meeting, you need to make an effort to be positive and talk yourself into speaking.

Even if you tell yourself that you’ll at least share your point of view, there’s nothing to lose. Besides that, you need to surround yourself with positive people. If someone doesn’t like you or tries to tear you down, those are people you don’t need in your life. But being around positive people will make you more confident, allowing you to stop seeing validation at all costs.

validation

Final Thoughts on How to Become the Woman Who Doesn’t Seek Validation

Being a woman has never been easy. Though it has become easier to have freedom and follow your dreams, there are still a lot of societal expectations and pressures that can impede women from achieving their highest potential. And there are many areas where women are still not equal to men.

But that doesn’t mean your worth stems from validation from virtual strangers. Nor do you need to seek it. To become a woman who doesn’t seek validation, you need to understand what your worth is–it does not come from the approval you get. You also need to acknowledge your success and strengths and appreciate every little progress you make.

Besides that, you need to learn new behaviors that will teach you to focus on yourself. Practicing self-care and self-love are potentially the things that will help you become the best woman you can be. And, by being confident, you’ll make sure you don’t need anyone’s approval but the one you give yourself.

10 Under Eye Care Tips to Reduce Wrinkles

No one wants wrinkles and dark circles under their eyes, but it’s a common occurrence as people age. Even younger people experience eye puffiness and swelling due to stress, sleep deprivation, and other causes. While appearance certainly isn’t everything, it can hinder your confidence if you have bags under your eyes.

As you age, the skin beneath the eyes begins to sag, causing fluid retention under the eyes. Certain factors, such as changes in the weather, allergies, and heredity, can weaken skin near the eyes. However, lifestyle choices such as alcohol, drugs, smoking, and diet can also affect the skin’s appearance.

Usually, eye bags don’t signal a serious underlying condition, so you don’t have to worry if you notice them. However, dark circles under the eyes may sometimes indicate an allergic reaction, especially if you experience pain or swelling. It’s essential to see a doctor immediately if you have any severe symptoms like these.

With that said, let’s discuss a few tips to help prevent wrinkles and lines around the eyes from forming.

10 Natural Eye Care Tips to Prevent Wrinkles

wrinkles

1. Manage allergy symptoms that can cause dark circles and puffiness.

As we said above, allergies can cause itchy, puffy eyes, especially in the spring and fall when pollen counts are high. Make sure to take antihistamines, exercise frequently, and drink plenty of water to reduce allergy symptoms. Taking care of your health from the inside out will help keep your allergies under control.

2. Avoid overeating salt.

Eating an abundance of salt can cause fluid retention, even beneath the eyes. Try eating whole, fresh foods without added salt to avoid wrinkles and puffy eyes. Too much sodium can cause other health issues, such as high blood pressure, strokes, and heart disease. It’s best for overall health to eat a maximum of 2,300mg of sodium daily, according to the USDA.

3. Exercise frequently to eliminate wrinkles.

Exercise helps your body eliminate toxins and excess fluids through sweat, which can benefit your eye health. It also helps slow down the signs of aging, which include wrinkles and sagging skin. In addition to physical exercises like cardio and weight training, facial workouts may improve your skin’s appearance.

Studies show that doing “face yoga” for thirty minutes daily can reduce wrinkles and strengthen facial muscles. Some ideas for face exercises include eye-openers, forehead lifters, cheek lifters, and jaw stretches.

4. Eat more collagen in your diet to avoid wrinkles.

If you don’t consume enough collagen, your skin will lose elasticity and strength. This happens naturally due to aging, but you can slow down the process by upping your collagen intake. Collagen is the most abundant protein in our bodies, found in the muscles, bones, tendons, and skin. So, if you want firmer, smoother skin, try eating chicken bone broth, meat, eggs, dairy, legumes, and soy. These foods are rich in collagen and provide other essential nutrients like calcium, magnesium, potassium, and iron.

5. Choose the right concealer to hide wrinkles.

It’s not always easy to find the right shade of concealer that suits your skin. A good rule of thumb is to buy a concealer one or two shades lighter than your natural skin tone. The lighter shade helps highlight your face, creates an even complexion, and reduces the appearance of wrinkles. Make sure not to apply too much, as overdoing it can make wrinkles more prominent.

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6. Take off your makeup before going to bed.

Keeping your makeup on all night is a recipe for disaster and can cause puffy eyes the following day. Eye makeup can irritate the eyes and cause infections if left on too long. Use a washcloth or face wash to remove your makeup before bed each night. Of course, this won’t help reduce wrinkles, but it’s an essential step for proper hygiene.

7. Limit or avoid alcohol.

Try to drink water instead of alcohol since the latter can dehydrate the skin. Dehydration often creates dark circles beneath the eyes and can also exacerbate wrinkles. Not to mention, drinking too much alcohol can lead to bloodshot eyes, making eye bags even more noticeable. Opt for water instead to increase vitality and give your skin a youthful appearance.

8. Steer clear of cigarettes to reduce wrinkles.

Smoking cigarettes can cause numerous health issues, including premature aging and wrinkles around the eyes. While these are merely aesthetic reasons to avoid smoking, most people would love to hold onto their youth as long as possible. Cigarettes contain myriad harmful ingredients and toxic chemicals that can rapidly accelerate aging. It’s best to quit smoking for your general health, not just for superficial reasons.

9. Apply a cold compress to your eyes to reduce dark circles.

If you suffer from swollen, puffy eyes, try applying a cold compress to your face. Ice or freezing water constricts blood vessels in your face, helping reduce wrinkles and tighten the skin. If you’d like, add a few slices of cucumbers to increase hydration and eliminate dark circles around the eyes. Lying down with a cold compress can also help you unwind after a long work day as a bonus!

10. Be mindful of sun exposure.

If you want to keep wrinkles at bay, limit your time in the sun, especially during summer. When you spend time outdoors, apply sunscreen often and shield your eyes with a pair of quality sunglasses. Also, wear a wide-brimmed hat to add an extra layer of protection against the sun’s powerful rays.

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Final Thoughts on Effective Ways to Reduce Wrinkles

Some people have an aversion to aging, likely because of the pressure in modern society to maintain a youthful image. However, nature eventually takes its course, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take steps to retain healthy-looking skin. To reduce wrinkles, adhere to the pillars of health: exercise, get plenty of sleep, eat a healthy diet, and manage stress. Also, protect yourself while in the sun and avoid alcohol and cigarettes. You can’t stay young forever, but you can do your best to slow the aging process by practicing self-care.

5 Behaviors That Reveal a Carb Addict

Most people have heard of sugar addicts, but carbs can be just as enticing. Simple carbs have the most significant appeal because they provide a quick burst of energy. Plus, most foods containing these carbs taste delicious, such as donuts or burgers. When you’re in a time crunch, you may not always be able to prepare a homemade meal. Since fast food establishments abound in America, most people choose the latter.

However, saving time on making a meal comes at a steep price when it comes to your health. One unhealthy meal every so often won’t make much of a difference. But when you make a habit out of consuming carbs that digest quickly, it can cause poor mental and physical health.

For instance, obesity, diabetes, heart disease, strokes, anxiety, and depression can result from an unhealthy diet. Numerous studies have linked the rising consumption of highly processed foods to the global overweight and obesity epidemic. According to the CDC, around 42% of adults over age 20 suffer from obesity, while 73% are overweight.

These statistics are alarming, revealing a profoundly sick society where ill health has normalized. However, that doesn’t mean we should accept diseases without trying to fix the underlying problem first. We can restore our health by eating the proper foods, exercising regularly, and remembering to prioritize self-care.

First, it’s essential to recognize the signs that you or someone you know could have a carb addiction. We’ll discuss some common behaviors of carb fanatics and ways to overcome these bad habits.

5 Common Behaviors of Carb Addicts

carb addict

1. Carb addicts crave desserts after every meal.

Many people that overeat carbs enjoy having desserts after dinner because they crave a sugar rush. Because they don’t eat enough fats or protein, they must compensate by using quick energy sources, like simple carbs. Desserts like cakes and brownies have plenty of these carbs to satisfy the need for easy calories. However, eating these types of food often can point to sugar addiction.

2. Carbs addicts are emotional eaters.

People eat food not only for energy but comfort as well. After a long, difficult day at work, most people want to put a hearty meal in their bellies. Since humans first walked the Earth, we’ve associated food with comfort because it meant we survived another day. In the modern world, people eat primarily because of mental discomfort associated with external stressors.

Simply put, food makes us feel better, and nothing increases dopamine like a slice of cake or spaghetti.

3. The carb addict could stand to lose weight.

If you feel more sluggish than usual, weight loss can help restore your energy levels. However, people with severe food addictions may struggle to adopt a healthy lifestyle without professional help. Therapists and nutritionists often work with people with disordered eating habits to help them uncover the root cause of their behavior. After all, our physical health mirrors our mental state, so obesity and overweight begin in the mind.

4. You feel tired after meals.

People who have a carb addiction often complain of feeling fatigued after eating. That happens because their insulin spikes dramatically due to the influx of sugars in the body. As the pancreas struggles to regulate blood glucose, it can cause sleepiness once insulin levels drop back to normal. The only macronutrient that can cause this reaction is carbs, as fats and protein have a minimal effect on insulin.

5. You have Type II diabetes.

While type I diabetes does not have a cure, type II diabetes can be managed or even prevented with a healthy lifestyle. For instance, cutting back on simple carbs and sugars can keep blood glucose at a normal level. Unfortunately, diabetes has become an epidemic in many Western countries because of our highly processed diets. Around 96 million Americans over age 18 have prediabetes, according to the CDC.

Three Healthy Habits that Reduce Carb Cravings

carb addict

It can feel hopeless or frustrating if you can’t seem to lower your carbohydrate intake. However, any positive habits can cancel out harmful ones with enough repetition. With consistency and willpower, you can achieve anything, including adopting a healthier diet. Below, we’ll give you three tips to kickstart your wellness journey:

1. Eat more protein with and between meals.

Both carbs and protein contain four calories per gram, but not all macronutrients are created equally. Protein requires more energy for your body to digest and reduces levels of the hunger hormone ghrelin. Eating more protein with meals ensures you remain satisfied longer than consuming processed carbs.

2. Remain active so you don’t eat out of boredom.

Have you ever known someone who mindlessly eats when they have nothing to do? Many people find themselves adopting this unhealthy habit in the modern world. Combating eating out of boredom begins with staying active and keeping your mind busy. If you don’t have as much time to eat, you naturally will eat fewer calories.

3. Consume healthy fats.

Both fats and protein can help you feel fuller and are essential for a healthy diet. Fats contain nine calories per gram, so when combined with protein, they quickly increase satiety. Try cooking chicken breasts or tofu in ghee or olive oil for a healthy dose of fats and proteins. However, steer clear of hydrogenated oils in margarine and shortening, as these can raise LDL cholesterol levels.

carb addict

Final Thoughts on Habits of  the Carbohydrate Addict

We need a healthy amount of carbohydrates in our diets to function optimally. However, numerous advertisements bombard us with images of burgers and fries, appealing to our most basic, primitive desires. Feeling motivated to cook a homemade meal is difficult when you have temptations in your face left and right. But you can overcome a carb addiction and practice healthy living if you believe in yourself. Start by adopting one healthy habit per month until you’ve reached your goal.

5 Ways to Slow Down Deforestation

Deforestation rates have risen dramatically in the last century due to the population explosion and agricultural developments. To put this into perspective, half of the global forest loss occurred from 8,000 BC to 1900. The other half occurred only since the turn of the century.

You would think that with over eight billion people on the planet, sprawling urban populations cause the most significant deforestation. However, cities account for just 1% of worldwide habitable land; agriculture far surpasses urban land use regarding forest loss. In the last 10,000 years, humans have destroyed one-third of global forests due to agricultural land expansion. That equates to an area twice the size of the U.S., with most losses occurring in tropical forests.

Revealing the Harm of Deforestation

As awareness about the climate and biodiversity crises grows, leaders worldwide have started brainstorming solutions. Reversing or slowing down deforestation won’t solve all our problems, but it’s a step in the right direction. We need trees to survive as they provide the oxygen we breathe and absorb carbon in the air.

They also play a crucial role in reducing flooding and balancing weather systems. Finally, they have a natural air purifying effect which can help immensely with global pollution. Without trees, we wouldn’t exist, so protecting this precious resource is in our best interest.

Unfortunately, the UN estimates that we’ve lost 13 million hectares of global forest annually since 1990. Most of the deforestation occurs in tropical forests in Brazil, Indonesia, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo. However, losses have also been reported in temperate and boreal forests in the US, Canada, and Russia. While the latter contains the largest area of natural forests globally, the country has led the way in deforestation since 2000.

Still, we shouldn’t feel hopeless about tackling forest loss globally. In fact, 2021 research found that almost 59 million hectares of forests – roughly the size of France – have regrown since 2000. The greatest gains have occurred in the Atlantic Forest in Brazil, where an estimated 4.2 million hectares have been regenerated.

While countries have made significant progress in restoring forests, many areas still face threats from habitat loss. Ecologists and governments worldwide have come together to solve one of humanity’s most pressing problems. They’ve come up with several solutions that could help slow down deforestation and climate change.

Five Ways to Tackle Deforestation

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1. Give power back to the people.

Industrialized nations have benefited immensely from the destruction of nature, economically speaking. As their populations boomed, forests disappeared to accommodate houses, roads, and other modern infrastructure. Resources began to dwindle, so they turned to poorer countries to provide more food and fuel.

However, many Western countries have taken an authoritarian approach to obtaining these vital resources. In particular, they want to control how developing nations utilize their forests, not considering how this impacts local citizens. For example, cocoa farmers in Ghana must adhere to strict guidelines when trading with the EU. They can’t even cut trees on their land without special permits; if they violate this policy, they’re accused of illegal logging.

So, giving power back to local people can slow down deforestation rates because they intimately understand how to care for nature. If they have a stake in the economic benefits the trees can provide, they will have even more incentive to adopt sustainable practices.

2. Call on indigenous populations for conservation practices.

Another effective strategy to tackle forest loss involves giving indigenous people more control of the land. A 2021 study found that deforestation rates on Indigenous lands are far lower than in non-protected areas. The researchers found that tree-felling declined by 20% in regions managed by indigenous communities. In some cases, native lands had even lower tree loss rates than national parks.

Since indigenous cultures have historically been remarkable stewards of the land, it only makes sense to call on them for advice. We could learn much from their ancient wisdom and spiritual connection to the Earth.

3. Ban unsustainable products from grocery stores.

deforestation

Stopping forest degradation isn’t just about allowing local populations to control the land. It also involves taking stock of what we need to survive rather than what we desire. We could prevent most deforestation by using our resources wisely and doing away with greed. Also, we should adopt a more sustainable farming approach, particularly with beef, soy, palm oil, cocoa, coffee, and wood fiber. These seven commodities cause most of the global forest loss attributed to agriculture.

If governments can pass policies to ban unsustainable versions of these products, it could significantly lower deforestation rates. Also, rewarding eco-friendly companies and products with lower tax rates and subsidies would have a positive environmental impact.

4. Reduce global meat consumption.

One of the largest drivers of deforestation is global beef consumption since raising animals for food requires vast swaths of land. However, a 2022 study discovered that reducing beef intake by 20% globally could halve forest destruction rates. If we cut back on all forms of meat, it would have an even more enormous impact on the planet.

Farmers in the global south must clear massive land areas for growing soy for livestock feed. By reducing meat consumption, more land would remain for less intensive food products. It would also help to consume more local foods to put less pressure on the global food system.

5. Put more pressure on governments.

Even if citizens worldwide united to tackle climate change, it wouldn’t matter without government support. Governments have made considerable strides to restore harmony with nature, but we still face numerous threats from a warming planet. Focusing more on implementing green, progressive policies rather than just passing them would immensely help the fight against climate change.

For example, when Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva became president of Brazil in 2003, he enforced strict tree-felling policies. As a result, deforestation rates declined for five consecutive years. A combination of robust government action and lifestyle changes can help combat forest loss and other drivers of global warming.

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Final Thoughts on How to Stop Deforestation

Deforestation rates have risen exponentially over the last century. While some areas of the globe have seen improvements in land management, others have declined even further. In the face of climate change, humanity must unite and do whatever it takes to protect the planet. We can reduce environmental damage by adopting indigenous practices and giving power back to local populations instead of corporations. Also, reducing global meat consumption, banning unsustainable products from supply chains, and demanding government action can help forests recover.

7 Stages of a Spiritual Awakening

Spiritual awakening often correlates with religion, which is why most people don’t even consider it. It’s easy to assume that this process is simply made up or that you must be religious to experience it. Since more people have moved away from organized spirituality, things such as spiritual awakening aren’t what people are interested in researching.

But whether you want to or not, you might experience it at some point. And it’s best to understand the stages to get something out of the process. Now, it’s fair to be skeptical when you hear about spirituality. Even though some things are rooted in science, some spirituality is faith-based. Belief is a big part of the concept, which is not bad.

That being said, this allows people to use spirituality to trick others. Let’s face it; everyone knows someone scammed by a witch or a palm reader. So, being anxious about believing another scam is more than understandable. But no need to worry when it comes to spiritual awakening.

This is the furthest thing from fake witches who claim they can predict your future. And it can be your first step towards better understanding your spiritual side. If you want to learn about spiritual awakening but don’t know where to start, here is a list of the seven stages you go through in this process.

What Is Spiritual Awakening?

Before getting to the stages, you must understand spirituality. This notion has existed for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. Most cultures and religions have their spin on the concept. You might have heard about it as “nirvana” or “enlightenment.” No matter what you call it, the aim is the same. It’s to transcend your present state, step away from your current life, and step back into it with a new purpose. All of this might seem a little hard to believe.

Mainly because the way most people explain the concept is pretty vague. But everything becomes much clearer when you look at the psychological explanations that support the process. Carl Jung, who is a well-known psychiatrist, has been the one who popularised spiritual awakening in Western countries. Before that, it was almost exclusively practiced in Eastern cultures. Jung explained that spiritual awakening is the process of coming back to the original Self.

spiritual awakening

Understanding the Self (Ego)

The concept of self has undergone some modifications as psychology evolved. However, Jung always refers to the union between consciousness and unconsciousness when writing about the Self. Also, in Jungian psychology, the Self represents the psyche. So, in Jung’s perspective, spiritual awakening is the process through which someone transcends their ego, which leads them to be reborn again.

Not everyone will experience a spiritual awakening throughout their life. The ego is a part of the human personality in all individuals. But getting too wrapped up and focused on the ego is easy. You’ll likely never experience a spiritual awakening if that’s the case.

Even if you aren’t obsessed with the ego, it’s still not a promise that you’ll go through this process, as it’s usually not something you can trigger. Instead, it’s triggered by big, life-changing events, such as life-threatening illnesses and accidents. And even then, it’s not always a given that you’ll go through all seven stages. Instead, you might experience one or a few of them.

The 7 Stages of Spiritual Awakening

Here are the seven steps to achieve greater spirituality.

1.      The Catalyst to Your Spiritual Awakening

Also known as the awakening, this stage is the one that triggers the whole process. Even though everyone has their path and they might experience the stages in different orders, this one is integral. Without a reason to change your life, you won’t have any reason to introspect and honestly shift your perspective on life.

Not to mention that most people are just too comfortable with their routine and too scared to dive into the depths of their minds. So, they need to experience something so traumatic that it shakes their entire value system. But, of course, traumatic events are different for everyone. Sure, some events are likely to shake everyone to the core.

Accidents, sicknesses, and losing loved ones are likely catalysts for awakening. But some people even experience spirit visitations that make them reconsider everything. This might seem insane, but spirit visitations are nothing more than the projections of one’s subconscious. But, for some, they are so vivid and shocking that they trigger a spiritual awakening.

2.      A Shift in Perception

This is the stage that is most likely to follow the catalyst stage. It’s when you begin to see things differently and ask yourself questions. In this stage, you have still not completely let go of your current self. But you are on the way to getting there. This stage is one that many people experience. Still, reaching that stage is not a promise that you will finish the journey.

For some people, this shift means that you hit rock bottom. In some cultures, this stage is named “the dark night of the soul.” The catalyst has triggered changes that make you feel so unstable that you begin going through an existential crisis. You’ll likely feel overwhelmed and depressed. But if you persevere, this will lead you further down the path of spiritual awakening.

3.      Discovering a New Acceptance of Spirituality

The next stage is starting the journey of discovery. Some people call it the sponge stage because you are open to new ideas. Because you’ve gone through trauma and likely experienced the lowest of lows, you won’t care about holding on to your beliefs. Instead, you’ll find that you are open to all perspectives. Anything goes as long as you can gather knowledge.

When you start discovering the world, you won’t feel dread and depression anymore. Of course, you’re going through changes, so you’ll still be frightened. But you’ll also feel thrilled to expand your field of awareness and continue the journey of spiritual awakening.

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4.      Emergence of Self

At this point, you’ll have thousands of existential questions running through your mind and want answers for all of them. But you’ll also start to understand what you are going through and look at the world differently. And you will begin to connect to your true self.

The world isn’t about material possessions anymore. It’s more about the spiritual and emotional side as you start understanding how important it is to be true to yourself.

5.      Soul Work

Some people reach the stage of soul work, but it can take decades to complete. It’s not uncommon for this to be the last stage people reach. For it to be completed, you must do a lot of work.

In this stage, you start building a structure and a new set of values to guide your life. You’ll want a routine nurturing your body, mind, and soul. But it’ll likely take years to be pleased with how you treat yourself. To be at peace with your soul, you must learn about yourself, so your inner self can thrive. This is when you grow and heal from any trauma you might be holding on to.

6.      Surrendering to Your Newfound Spirituality

Most people struggle with surrendering the things they no longer need on their journey of spiritual awakening. Because we live in a material world, it can be almost unimaginable to disconnect from it and connect with your spiritual side, which is why most people don’t ever reach this stage. But the things that keep you connected to the material world aren’t just worldly possessions. They can also be people, old habits, or insecurities.

This stage is often described as shedding the last things that keep you shackled to the present. And, to complete it, you need to find a spiritual meaning that transcends the ego. Even though you need to let go of self-centered desires, this path is one you walk alone. But that doesn’t mean you’ll be lonely or sad. On the contrary, this is where you find happiness and confidence in your purpose.

7.      Awareness of Your Full Spiritual Awakening

You’ll integrate your spiritual side with your physical being in this stage. Or, in other words, you are reintegrating with your soul so you can start living your true life. You’ll align with your highest self and reach a connected awareness. Instead of focusing on the differences between people, you’ll start to understand that everyone is intertwined and has their purpose in the world.

You’ll understand that the Universe is an entity in which you play a vital role. When you reach that realization, you’ll complete the journey of spiritual awakening. But because this is the end of your spiritual journey, it doesn’t mean that life will suddenly stop. It’s the opposite. That’s when your life truly starts. Sure, you’ll still have mundane issues and face hurdles. But you won’t let them bring you down because you’ll always focus on being true to your true purpose.

spiritual awakening

Final Thoughts on the Stages of Spiritual Awakening

Spiritual awakening is a life-altering journey. Whether you ever finish it, you’ll learn something from any stage you experience. And if you manage to finish it, it will open you up to an entirely new perception of fulfillment. Unfortunately, the catalysts of spiritual awakening can be everyday traumatic events that trigger a wave of introspection. But, in some cases, they are fascinating events that lead to increased spirituality that can be hard to believe.

Carl Jung’s catalyst was a dream that some would describe as psychedelic. But that’s just the first stage. After the trigger, you’ll experience a shift in perception. Some people will hit rock bottom and never get back up. But those who do start a journey of discovery, the emergence of self and soul work. Most people get stuck in the fifth stage and never finish the journey. But if you surrender, you’ll reach the final stage, awareness. And that’s when your life truly starts.

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