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8 Things A Strong Woman Should Never Apologize For

There is certainly a time and place for asking for forgiveness, and women can show strength by being humble when needed. Asking for forgiveness when we make a mistake is a positive character trait, whereas over-apologizing can be seen as a sign of weakness.

“I’m sorry” can roll off of the tongue so easily that it can leave you wondering if you did anything that was really worth apologizing for.

When an apology is called for, a strong woman does the right thing, but there are at least eight things that she should never feel that she has to apologize for.

8 Things A Strong Woman Should Never Apologize For

apology

1. Making choices against convention

Even women who consider themselves liberated from social conventions feel that they will be judged for going against the expectations that others have for women, even though that expectation has changed over time.

She can choose to focus on her career or choose not to have a career. Moreover, she can choose to stay single and childless or to have a traditional family. Indeed, women make choices that are right for them and they should never apologize for that.

2. Putting herself first

A strong woman knows that she can’t be her best for others unless she is already at her best. By taking care of her own needs before helping her family, boss or community, she is able to do more for them.

But first she has to be healthy, financially secure, and mentally strong. Strong women don’t apologize for prioritizing their to do list with taking care of her own needs.

3. Making plans without deferring to anyone

In the 1970’s a study found that prior to learning about women’s liberation, women felt the need to defer to men when making a decision. The need to ask permission of the men in their lives left them feeling resentment and anger.

Today, a strong woman knows that she is her own boss. She can make her own decisions about her future financial security, career, education, family or health. She doesn’t need to ask permission from anyone.

4. Being comfortable with sex

Consensual sex is healthy and natural to both men and women. But it’s only women who feel like we should hide the fact that we both have, and enjoy sex just as much as men do. A strong woman knows that she has control over her physical enjoyment. Beside that, she knows that she has a choice of whether or not to have a partner.

A strong woman rejects the negative labels that have been given to women who have sex frequently or outside of marriage. What she does with her body and whomever she wants is none of your business.

5. Speaking her mind

Words have power and a strong woman uses them to her advantage to communicate effectively. Strong women should never apologize for using language to express themselves; even if that includes swearing, raising her voice or saying unpopular things.

6. Saying no

‘No’ is a powerful word, and strong women will not apologize for using it liberally. A strong woman will decline to overextend herself so that she has more energy to devote to people and activities that are a priority.

Although it can be tempting to apologize for skipping your party, a strong woman knows that she’s not doing anything that needs your forgiveness. If you are upset that she can’t attend your event, that’s a negative emotion you put on yourself, not something that she has caused you to feel. Apologizing for someone else’s negative emotions is not what a strong woman will do.

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7. Having strong opinions

A strong woman will not apologize for having and expressing her unique thoughts, even if they differ from yours. She also has no need to apologize for holding seemingly conflicting beliefs.

For example when she expects a gentleman to hold the door for her while still expecting him to treat her as his equal.

Strong women are aware of the convention of devaluing traditional female roles and segregating gender in the workplace and they do not apologize for expressing their dissatisfaction with this.

Strong women will not apologize for expecting equal pay for equal work, equal treatment by the law and evolving gender roles.

8. Expecting more

A strong woman has a list of accomplishments that she wants for herself but she also knows that she is capable of much more. She not only expects herself to achieve, she expects the same of others. A strong woman knows what she wants to change and how to achieve it.

A study in Psychology of Women Quarterly found that when it comes to breaking gender barriers, women’s own expectations for their success were important to their sense of achievement.

Since gender discrimination still exists in the workplace, women bear a psychological and economic burden that men do not.

5 Ways To Live Without Regrets

After living on this planet for a while, you come to realize just how fragile and fleeting life truly is. None of us truly knows just how long we have here, so the best we can do is simply to live as if we might die tomorrow. To live freely and fully seems rare these days, but those who do tend to not have regrets at the end of their life. Regrets usually come from unsaid words, untouched dreams, and unsettled fights with those we love.

“There are no regrets in life, just lessons.”Jennifer Aniston

However, what if you could reach the end of your life and honestly say that you lived with no regrets? What if you left no stone unturned, no dream unfulfilled, and no question unanswered?

Here are 5 ways to live without regrets:

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1. Follow your heart no matter what.

Many people regret not going after their dreams when they mull over their life experiences. If your heart wants something unattainable or farfetched, follow it anyway. Take the path less traveled anyway because no one knows what you truly want except you. Your heart would never lie to you or lead you down the wrong path, so listen to it. Your intuition and subconscious are potent tools for giving your life direction, so heed their call. This way, even if your plans don’t turn out as you expected, and you have to turn around and start over, at least you can say you gave your dreams a fair shot. At least you can say you faced your fears and didn’t let them hold you back.

2. Live life on the edge with no worries or regrets.

Don’t worry so much about staying inside the lines and following the rules. Take risks sometimes, be daring, and be a rebel. Life becomes more meaningful and rewarding when you can leave behind inhibitions and embrace the wild side. At the end of your life, you will regret what you didn’t do, not what you did. So, what do you have to lose? Buy a plane ticket to your favorite country, leave the job you hate, tell people you love them, and eat that slice of chocolate cake if you want it. Your life = your rules.

3. Let your true self shine through.

Too many people live shackled to other people’s opinions of them. They want to please everyone, so they disappoint themselves by attempting to do so. Remember that you only have to worry about loving and pleasing yourself; the right people will manifest themselves when you stay true to your heart. Whatever your message, could you not hold it back? Your existence tells a story, so what do you want to say to the world? How do you want to present yourself to the person looking back at you in the mirror? Make yourself proud, and live by your truth. Nothing else matters but what you think about yourself.

4. Love as hard as possible and as often as possible.

Imagine how different our world would look if everyone gave love openly and freely. People wouldn’t live so much in fear and wouldn’t allow their walls to block out compassion and true love. It does take time and practice to become so vulnerable and willing to accept and give love, but with some dedication, you can master the idea of unconditional love. First, you must accept and love yourself before you can do the same for others. When we talk about giving and receiving love, we also mean self-love and self-acceptance.

Many people fear what will happen when they wear their hearts on their sleeves, but even if someone breaks your heart, nothing feels worse than locking your love away and throwing away the key. Don’t be selfish with your love; the world could use much more of it.

strong women have no regrets

5. Don’t worry about things out of your control.

Please don’t allow your mind to obsess over everything that could go wrong in life; come back to the present moment, and lose yourself in it. Anxiety occurs when we give our minds permission to run wildly like a kid in a candy store; we must put our feet down and not allow this behavior. Regrets will only destroy your happiness, and make you feel powerless and weak. You own your mind, body, and soul, so focus solely on developing yourself. Leave everything else alone, and you will live a much more peaceful, joyous life.

10 Signs You’re Having Trouble Letting Go Of A Relationship

Clinging to the idea of a happy relationship after it’s already ended can leave you in emotional limbo. You feel sad, lonely and hopeless and hoping to end the pain. Some relationships end dramatically, but some just linger without coming to a resolution.

The pain of the loss of a close romantic partnership can’t end until you take action to heal yourself emotionally. Letting go is a normal part of releasing a past failed relationship. Feeling stuck? Read on to find out if you’re holding onto past relationships.

10 Signs You’re Having Trouble Letting Go Of A Relationship:

1. You can’t forgive your ex

At the end of a relationship you may harbor feelings of anger or resentment toward your ex. This is perfectly normal, but continuing to feel these negative emotions can drain your energy.

To find your happy again, release the anger that you feel toward your ex. Instead of clinging to the past, let go of the hurt that you feel by expressing forgiveness to your ex. You can do this privately to yourself or in writing in a personal journal.

2. You can’t forgive yourself

Letting go after a breakup will involve some evaluation of your own role in the end of the relationship. Even if your behavior was not the problem that caused the breakup, your role may have been allowing it to continue for longer than necessary.

To move on, look back objectively at what actions or inaction you took that contributed to the breakup. Forgive yourself for your part in the breakup and make a decision to learn from the experience.

3. You’re focusing only on what was good

You’re having trouble letting go if you can only remember the best parts of your relationship. Rather than seeing the frustrations and arguments that were part of your partnership, you only remember how good you felt when your ex loved you.

4. You’re emotionally blocked

Bottling up your emotions is unhealthy. We need to find productive ways to express feelings of sadness and regret at the loss of a romantic relationship. To help you move on, try writing your feelings about the breakup.

Researchers found that people who wrote about the positive emotional aspects of a relationship after a breakup were more likely to feel positive about the breakup afterward. Those who were able to write about the positive emotions that they felt reported feelings of comfort, confidence, empowerment, energy, happiness, optimism, relief, satisfaction, thankfulness, and wisdom.

5. You’re afraid of being alone

Being alone isn’t scary if you like the person that you’re with. Remember that you weren’t always with your former partner and you did just fine on your own. You can read more about coping with being alone here.

6. You fantasize about what might have been

If you could go back in time, you wouldn’t have to worry about letting go because you’d do things differently to prevent the breakup. Living in fantasies about what might have been is counter-productive to healing from the breakup.

Unless you are actively trying to rekindle things with your ex, letting go and focusing on how good the future could be without them is what you should be fantasizing about.

7. You’re reluctant to change

Personal growth after a breakup is one benefit that can come from an otherwise negative experience. Rather than clinging to the past, focus on what you have learned as a result of the failure of the relationship. Think about how you have grown as a person and what you would do differently next time.

Letting go after a breakup will require you to change your perspective. What used to be good is now gone. Getting over the breakup will help you to be more emotionally resilient when you encounter a loss in the future.

8. Your negative emotions are concerning

Your thoughts are so negative that you feel hopeless, depressed, and anxious about the future. Other potentially concerning thoughts are those that involve harm to self or others. You should seek the help of a professionally licensed therapist if you are experiencing any deeply disturbing emotions that are making it difficult to let go.

A study in the Journal of Positive Psychology found that positive emotions can occur following a break-up, particularly when the previous relationship did not contribute any opportunities for personal growth. Experiencing positive emotions was especially true when personal growth occurred after the break-up.

9. You haven’t let yourself grieve

The breakup of a romantic relationship can require a grieving process similar to the loss of a loved one. We go through the stages of grief including denial, bargaining, anger and acceptance.

Finding a way to let go of the past, make up for the loss and go on living without the relationship can take anywhere from several days to months or even years. Pain and loss is something that we all experience as a part of human nature. Learning to handle loss in a way that helps you to move toward positive emotions will be a valuable skill that you can use to emotionally protect yourself when loss happens again.

10. You can’t picture your future after the end

Letting go of your ex means an uncertain future and right now, that’s difficult to imagine. Rather than dwelling on what could have been, picture yourself happy in the future. You can chose to stay single or seek a new romantic partner. The freedom to be the master of your future can help you to see a positive side of letting go.

10 Things To Avoid Before Bed

Getting enough sleep is necessary if we are to be our best selves. Unfortunately, many of us don’t – 35% of the population state that they don’t get a minimum of seven hours of sleep a night. Consequently, a lack of bed rest is a public health epidemic. Wait, an epidemic? Is it that serious? The Center for Disease Control – the U.S. foremost public health authority–says it is.

The reason for this is simple: sleep deprivation does not only harm the individual (which is reason enough), but harms our entire society. Sleep insufficiency can cause the following harmful outcomes:

  • motor vehicle crashes
  • industrial disasters
  • medical errors
  • other occupational errors

Also, individuals with sleep deficiencies are more likely to suffer from health issues like hypertension, diabetes, depression, obesity, increased mortality, cancer, and reduced quality of life. Around fifty to seventy million Americans are estimated to have a sleep or wakefulness disorder.

But it’s not just the “severe” consequences of sleep deprivation that concern public health officials. Consider these self-reported statistics of sleep-related difficulties reported by adults 20 years or older.

  • 23.2% (49.2 million) have difficulty concentrating.
  • 18.2% (38.8 million) have difficulty remembering things.
  • 10.5% (22.3 million) have difficulty taking care of finances.

Certainly, our schedules are loaded with things to do. Work, school, kids, spouses, and other responsibilities take up much of our day. But is there something that we are doing that’s causing such poor sleep habits? The Center for Disease Control and other health officials give a resounding “YES!” to that question.

Here are 10 of the most common habits to avoid before bed:

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1. Going to sleep or waking up at different hours

According to Dr. Brandon Peters at About Health, we should select a wake time that is observable during both nights and weekends. For most people this would involve selecting a time that allows us to go to work or school and then getting up at the same time on Saturday and Sunday. The reason for this is that our bodies follow what is called the circadian rhythm, which relies on consistency. This means that our bodies signal when we should be truly awake and when we should be sleeping. We’re more alert and better prepared for work, school, etc., when we follow this pattern. We also sleep much better.

2. Drinking water immediately before bedtime

Notice the word immediately. Nobody is saying that drinking water isn’t essential, it is! But if we’ve done our part and hydrated appropriately throughout the day (7-8 12 oz. glasses), drinking a bunch of H2O at night becomes less necessary. Drinking water causes us to pee, and waking up to pee disrupts sleep. Pretty simple stuff here!

3. Consuming alcohol or tobacco

Alcohol and nicotine are sleep disruptors. One is a depressant (alcohol), and one is a stimulant (nicotine or tobacco); neither is conducive to a good night’s sleep. Alcohol reduces REM (Rapid Eye Movement), or deep sleep. Nicotine stimulates the brain and body, which makes it more difficult for us to settle in and drift off. For a good night’s rest, lay off the wine and cigarettes!

4. Eating a large meal

Ingesting a lot of food before bedtime can disrupt sleep. The reason is that our metabolism has to kick in, which makes it difficult to fall asleep and stay asleep. Further, a large amount of food in the stomach can become uncomfortable, which makes us prone to waking up. If that still isn’t enough, consider that eating large meals before bedtime has been associated with weight gain, gastroesophageal reflux disease, and other nasty physical effects.

5. Using a tablet or smartphone

Yep, this one kind of sucks…for everyone involved. We love our gadgets, and what is better than playing a game, texting, or reading an e-book while snuggled under the covers? We love it, but our bodies hate it. More specifically, our brains hate it. The reason is that electronics stimulate our cognitive faculties, making it more difficult for our brains and bodies to transition into a state that invites sleep. For a good night’s rest, lay off these gadgets while preparing to fall asleep.

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6. Texting in bed

This one is a no-brainer, especially since we’ve already discussed #5. However, texting at night, especially in bed, is so common and sleep-disruptive that it deserves its own section. Texting in bed is a double-edged sword: (1) we’re using an electronic device (smartphone) that makes it much more difficult to sleep, and (2) text messaging is perhaps the most powerful time vacuum; we get sucked deep into a conversation and, before you know it, an hour or two has passed. Lay off chatting with your besties before bed.

7. Exercising

Chalk this one up, along with drinking water, as the one of the two healthy activities that we shouldn’t do before bedtime. Exercise is awesome any other time of the day. This isn’t healthy before bedtime because the brain becomes highly alert due to the influx of “feel-good” hormones, such as endorphins. The muscles and the heart are also stimulated, which increases this alertness – not a good combination before sleep time.

8. Eating spicy or junk foods

Eating before bedtime is not good, but eating spicy or junk food before hitting the sack is worse. Spicy food increases body temperature, which causes sleep disruption. It also further speeds up the body’s metabolism. Junk food stimulates more brain waves, which disrupts our brain’s normal evening activity. Obviously, junk food also contains a heavy amount of sugar, which is counterproductive when trying to fall and stay asleep.

9. Trying to force sleep

With all of the emphasis on getting a good night’s sleep, it may become natural to stay in bed until sleep. In fact, this is not good practice, and we are probably all guilty of doing it. Trying to force sleep doesn’t work because sleep requires a calm state of mind and body. When trying to force sleep, we become stressed and anxious and make the problem worse. Instead, we should get out of bed and do something else completely. Doing so takes our mind off of sleep and naturally tires us out a bit, making sleep easier to come by.

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10. Oversleeping

Our bodies have an internal clock that’s set for many things. One of them is sleep. Just as getting enough sleep is essential, it’s important not to overdo it. The main reason is that it jacks up our internal clocks; we feel groggy, foggy, and out-of-sorts, and getting back into a good sleep pattern becomes more challenging. We have to be careful with this next statement, but sleeping in occasionally is probably just fine!

This Powerful Christmas Ad Will Bring Tears To Your Eyes

With Christmas just around the corner, it’s the perfect time to reflect on what’s truly important in life. Most of us have very busy lives, and traveling to see all of our family members for the holidays isn’t always possible. However, this powerful video will make you think twice before you turn down an invitation to your parent’s or grandparent’s house for Christmas.

The German supermarket chain EDEKA created this ad so that people worldwide would remember the true meaning of the holiday season, and take the time to celebrate with their family. The ad starts with a disappointed father getting a message from his daughter that she and her children wouldn’t be able to make it this Christmas, and that they’d come next year instead.

We will let the rest of this “Christmas Story” unfold in the video below.

This Christmas, please remember to spend time with those you love; life goes by so fast, and we only get so many chances to embrace our loved ones, laugh with them, and create memories. In the midst of your holiday shopping and errands, don’t forget about what truly matters this Christmas.

If you like the message in this video, please share it with your friends and family for the Christmas holiday.

15 Powerful Quotes That Will Shake Your Soul

At some point in life, every one of us feels a little tired and uninspired, and wish we could just catch a break. When life begins to seem colorless and mundane, we seek sources of inspiration. Books, music, our friends and family, a new workout routine, or even a weekend drive to a special place can provide us with a whole new outlook on life. However, motivational and inspirational quotes that you can write on a Post-it and stick on your mirror can do the trick, too.

Here are 15 powerful quotes that will touch your soul:

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Read and reflect on these quotes when you need a dose of positivity in your life.

1. “Some people die at 25 and aren’t buried until 75.”  – Benjamin Franklin

2. “Be humble for you are made of earth. Be noble for you are made of stars.” – Serbian proverb

3. “The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” – Steven Furtick

4. “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day whispering, ‘I will try again tomorrow.’” – Mary Anne Radmacher

5. “You cannot dream yourself into a character: you must hammer and forge yourself into one.” – Henry David Thoreau

6. “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” – Rumi

7. “People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.” – Elizabeth Gilbert; Eat, Pray, Love

Ghandhi quote

8. “The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire.” – Field Marshal Ferdinand Foch

9. “Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” – Howard Thurman

10. “Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive — the risk to be alive and express what we really are.”  – Don Miguel Ruiz

11. “You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

12. “You must give up the life you planned in order to have the life that is waiting for you.” – Joseph Campbell

13. “I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they’re right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” – Marilyn Monroe

14. “Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.” – Henry Van Dyke

15. “Never be bullied into silence, never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life, define yourself.” – Robert Frost

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