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5 Ways To Humble Your Ego

July 8, 2015 by Power of Positivity

The ego, also known as the “false self,” wants you to believe that you are a separate entity from the rest of your reality. It must maintain control and power at all times in order to survive. And this attitude is why we see so much destruction and pain in this 3D paradigm. As a collective, we still allow our egos to dictate our lives, and as such, we see the same patterns repeating themselves over and over.

One of the hardest battles you will fight in life is the one against your own ego. That’s because it constantly needs attention and validation. The ego, ruled by the mind, tricks you into thinking your identity is built on your worldly labels. It hangs your worth on factors like your job title, how much money you make, what religion you follow, the color of your skin, your ethnicity, your political views, etc.

Everyone is born from the same consciousness, only knowing love and compassion for others. However, at an early age, most people are taught that their worth lies in other’s opinions of them. This leads people to seek attention, love, and acceptance outside of themselves. That shift in thinking means they are operating on the terms of the Ego.

Related article: 9 Signs Your Ego is Running Your Life

So, how can you humble your ego so that you can start living through your higher, more conscious self? Truthfully, it takes consistent commitment and practice in order to truly master yourself, but these tips can get you started on the right foot:

1. Ask yourself who you are outside of your earthly labels.

When you first wake up in the morning or before you go to sleep at night, sit quietly in your room and just ask yourself “Who am I?” Allow your thoughts and feelings to come to the surface, and don’t judge them. Just observe what comes up, and notice if most of your thoughts center around your job, possessions, money, or other things you’ve accumulated. You see, your thoughts don’t represent you, because you don’t own your thoughts. We don’t even truly own our bodies; we simply borrow them in this lifetime.

As you delve deeper into your true identity, as you strip away every false layer of your old self, you will find that you are simply the universe expressing itself through form. You are a fragment of this grand consciousness, swirling through space with endless possibilities. We are all Light in pure form, and as you realize and accept this truth, all the outdated beliefs and thought processes that stem from fear will melt away.

2. Help others often.

The Ego gains even more power as one obsesses over him or herself and attaches those thoughts or beliefs to his or her identity. However, when you volunteer or just lend a helping hand to others, you forget about your Self for a while and instead shift your attention outward to your fellow humans in need. This paradigm shift going on is about releasing our obsession with “I” and instead focusing on “We.” Offering your hands and heart to others will help you dissolve your ego and feed your soul, an ever-lasting body of energy, instead.

3. Listen more, talk less.

Another habit of those who live through their egos is talking more than they listen. The ego always wants to be heard, and it won’t let others take center stage. The false self wants all the limelight and praise and finds it difficult to let others have attention for any length of time. One way to overcome this is to develop a new habit: listening more than you talk. Allow others to fully finish what they have to say before you respond or bring up a new topic; this way, you will learn to have a balanced relationship with others rather than one solely built on an out-of-control ego.

This will also help you relax and go with the flow rather than always having to control a situation and overtake the conversation.

4. Make meditation a habit.

Now, with all this talk of the ego, you might think you should fight the ego since it constantly wants control of you. However, resisting the ego will only cause more problems, because as you might know, what you resist persists. There’s nothing inherently wrong with the ego; after all, we must have some sense of self in order to ward off predators, establish relationships, develop self-worth, etc. It becomes an issue when you allow your ego to take control and dictate your whole life; when you believe that your ego IS you.

Meditation can help you see past your ego and get in touch with your higher self, the one that most accurately represents your soul. Breathe deeply and just let go – explore yourself beyond your thoughts and feelings, and you will get to know a whole world that exists inside yourself, where you can run and play freely without any attachments or limiting beliefs.

5. Resist the urge to always be right.

A trademark of the ego is that it always wants to have the last word. Furthermore, it can’t handle being wrong in any way. It must always fight back until others see through it’s eyes, but this can never happen. When the ego rules, it’s a classic scenario of the revolving door; it must repeat itself infinitely because it will always need validation. It cannot survive without this, and any opposition causes the ego to go on a rampage.

To overcome this, remember that others will always have different opinions than you. Realize that their opinions don’t invalidate yours; they simply see things from a different point of view, and they’re entitled to that. Once you allow others to express themselves and be themselves without feeling offended, you have made a marked step on the path to becoming humble and dissolving the ego.

5 Negative Emotions That May Be Stuck In Your Body

July 7, 2015 by Power of Positivity

As you may already know, all thoughts. emotions and feelings carry with them a certain vibration or energetic frequency.

Positive thoughts can increase your frequency by 10 Hz. On the other hand, negative thoughts decrease your energy by 12 Hz or more. That’s according to Dr. Gary Young, an expert on essential oils and how they can heal the body.

If your “frequency” becomes too low, your body becomes the perfect environment for dis-ease to thrive. And this can manifest in the form of depression, anxiety, irritable bowel syndrome, and candida, just to name a few. Disease simply cannot exist in a body and mind that operates on a higher frequency. That’s because expanded, oxygenated cells stave off disease.

Conversely, deoxygenated, contracted cells feed disease. With such a high rate of illness and disease, it’s important for all of us to raise our energetic frequency. That balance is needed so we can bring our physical, emotional, and spiritual health back into alignment.

Your mind can, in fact, make you sick, and holding in emotions allows the disease to spread because of the lower energies associated with these thoughts and feelings.

So, what are the main negative emotions you should look out for, and how can you release them?

Here are 5 Negative Emotions That Might Be Trapped In Your Body (And How To Release Them)

1. Anxiety

Anxiety occurs when we focus too much on the future, leading us to feel afraid of the unknown, and a sense of foreboding often overtakes those who feel anxious. When you fixate on the future, it manifests as an overwhelming state of worry and pensiveness within the body, and this can cause a slew of diseases, including COPD and heart disease.

2. Sadness and emotions that cause depression

Contrary to anxiety, sadness often gets lodged in our cells when we ruminate on the past, whether that includes grief about lost loved ones, sadness about a breakup, or anything else that causes us to feel depressed. Many times, people actually don’t even know they harbor these feelings because they haven’t given themselves a chance to acknowledge them. For example, you may still feel pain about a past breakup but never gave yourself the opportunity to go through the grieving process because of life responsibilities and demands.

Remedy: Smudging.

Smudging is actually an ancient practice used by indigenous cultures in order to cleanse the energy in a room or person. You can opt to perform a whole ceremony, or simply do a quick waft of the area if you think it doesn’t need that much attention. It consists of burning a bundle of sage or other herbs in order to clear out negative energy and invite more uplifting energy into the room or body.

You can read more about how to perform a smudging ceremony here.

3. Anger

Anger can stick to our energetic fields when we hold back our feelings, hold a grudge, or feel resentment toward a person or situation. Wrath can overtake our minds and bodies, disturbing our peace and distorting our view of the world. It can lead us to engage in unnecessary and even violent conflicts with people if these deep-seated feelings of hate and fury are not resolved.

Remedy: Voice your feelings or write them down.

Anger can easily build up if you don’t express how you feel in a calm manner. Once you have calmed down, make sure you talk to the person you had a disagreement with and explain rationally and logically how you feel. Or, if you can’t talk to the person directly, or the feelings aren’t directed toward a person, write them down in a journal. Always make sure to breathe deeply and think about what you say before you speak, though, to ensure that the conversation goes smoothly and conflicts get resolved.

4. Self-loathing

Hatred towards oneself usually results from negative self-talk and neglecting one’s needs. It can also be the product of a difficult or traumatic upbringing, where one didn’t get the attention and love that they needed in order to establish self-esteem. So many of us allow others to define our worth, which means we only see our value through other’s eyes.

Remedy: Positive affirmations.

In order to remove these lodged emotions like of worthlessness, you must counter any negative thoughts with positive ones. So, if you wake up saying that you hate yourself most mornings, start saying “I love myself” instead. Or, you could even say, “I am worthy,” or whatever statement makes you feel good about yourself.

5. Humiliation

This feeling also stems from putting too much value in other people’s opinions of you. Maybe you had an embarrassing experience in years past and allowed the remnants of that situation to stick with you. Humiliation is a loss of pride or dignity that results from trying to live up to society’s expectations. The outcome makes people feel like a failure when they don’t measure up.

Remedy: EFT Tapping.

The Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT, works to remove negative energy. In it, you practice tapping with the fingers on the meridians or energy pathways in the body. It’s very similar to Chinese acupuncture, just without the use of needles. Studies have shown that EFT can remove psychological stress by getting the blood flowing again within the body. Before EFT, the cells are often clumped together, but after, they move freely and independently once again. Studies have shown significant reductions in cortisol and emotion responses in the brainwaves of those that have undergone EFT.

15 Things to Remember When You Don’t Believe in Yourself

July 6, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Even the most positive people need encouragement and support. No one is immune to periods of self-doubt, so here are quotes to help you believe in yourself.

15 things to remember when you don’t believe in yourself.

1. Belief in yourself begins within.

“A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him.” – David Brinkley

There will always be haters and naysayers in life, and they become more apparent when we are feeling down. Don’t look outside for approval or validation, all we need to do is look inside our heart.

2. You are not your successes or failures.

“Remember that failure is an event, not a person,” – Zig Ziglar.

Who we are as people is based on our character, not on an outcome. We should make a point to remember the times you helped someone in need, cheered up a friend and hugged your kids. These are the acts that shape us.

3. It’s your life. Live your truth.

“I know where I’m going, and I know the truth, and I don’t have to be what you want me to be. I’m free to be what I want.” – Muhammad Ali

It’s hard to believe in ourselves when we spend our time trying to live up to other people’s expectations. Living your truth is the ultimate belief in yourself.

4. Keep moving forward.

“Opportunity does not knock; it presents itself when you beat down the door.” – Kyle Chandler

There are always times when giving up seems to be the only option. However, it rarely is. Trust that you are where you are meant to be and keep taking small steps forward.

5. You are closer than you think.

“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up” – Thomas A. Edison

There will always be tests on our way to doing something great. It’s as if the Universe wants to see how badly we want it. Success is found when we persevere.

6. You can become better.

“Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting.” – Christopher Morley

It’s hard to be the best at something right out of the gate. People become the best because they keep working at bettering their skill.

7. Do not define yourself by one moment in time.

“The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself.” – Mark Caine

Who we are and what we are capable of is not reflective of our current circumstances. Let’s not allow what happens in any given moment shape how we think of ourselves.

8. You are evolving.

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.” George Eliot

The beautiful thing about life is it gives us opportunities to evolve and continue to grow into our best selves. Know that every day contributes to the process of becoming who we are meant to be.

9. Break the big goals down.

“The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.” -Confucius

Self-doubt can creep in when we are overwhelmed by big goals. Big goals seem unattainable but when we break them down and focus on one thing at a time, they become achievable.

10. Find the courage.

“Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.” — Lord Chesterfield

We have to want to move through what is causing our self-doubt more than we want to stay where we are. Don’t dwell in the moment and instead, find the courage to face the fear that is holding us back.

11. You control the narrative.

“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” Maya Angelou

Our internal dialog handles how we look at ourselves and how we feel. Be thoughtful in your response to current circumstances and begin a dialog that is supportive and nurturing.

12. To win at life, you must get in the game.

“You can’t expect to hit the jackpot if you don’t put a few nickels in the machine.” – Flip Wilson

Just remember you win at life in one day, but the actions you take today will affect how you’ll look at tomorrow. Do something, anything, to stay in the game.

13. Focus on the good.

“I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.” – George Burns

Always seek out a good lesson. Then, you can live your truthful, more authentic life. When we choose to do things that make our heart sing, success will find its way to us.

14. Find the lessons.

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through the experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.” – Helen Keller

When we focus on the lessons, we can move forward confident in our abilities and knowing we are learning what we need to learn to keep living our best life.

15. Celebrate your uniqueness.

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” – Oscar Wilde

Let’s allow ourselves to be who we are without comparison to others. Celebrate all that makes us who we are because there is only one of each of us and our gifts are needed in the world.

10 Surprising Health Benefits of Walking Barefoot

July 5, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Also called “earthing” or “grounding,” the simple act of walking barefoot offers so many benefits that often get overlooked by mainstream society pushing the importance of wearing shoes at all times. According to Dr. Mercola, walking with your feet directly touching the soil allows your body to absorb negative electrons through the Earth, which helps to stabilize daily cortisol rhythm and create a balanced internal bioelectrical environment.

We have lost much of our connection with Mother Earth due to modern living. But making an effort to spend more time barefoot in nature can provide more benefits than you would think.

Here are 10 more health benefits of walking barefoot:

1. Walking barefoot can reduce pain and inflammation.

In this study, twelve people slept on a conductive mattress pad that mimicked the effects of sleeping directly on the Earth for eight weeks straight. All the participants complained of pain, stress, and trouble sleeping. After the test period, scientists discovered a considerable reduction in their cortisol levels. Furthermore, all subjects reported that their pain, stress, and sleep troubles had either been greatly reduced or disappeared entirely.

2. It can help improve your sleep.

Another study in PubMed revealed that earthing influences physiologic processes and induces relaxation. The Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine also reported that people who had been exposed to grounding had a better night’s sleep compared with those who did not walk barefoot regularly. Earthing is believed to stabilize circadian rhythms. Perhaps that explains why many people experience a better night’s sleep.

3. Walking barefoot strengthens the immune system.

In this comprehensive report published in the Journal of Environmental and Public Health, researchers found that walking barefoot can actually decrease white blood cell count and increase red blood cell count. This outcome indicates a positive immune response.

4. Walking barefoot can reduce the risk of heart disease.

According to a study published in the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, earthing increases the surface charge of red blood cells. This results in the reduction of clumping in the cells, which therefore decreases blood thickness. Since high viscosity has been directly linked as a risk factor in heart disease, earthing therefore reduces the risk of heart disease significantly.

5. Walking barefoot regulates the nervous system, decreasing feelings of anxiety and stress.

Going outside, in general, can help regulate emotions and balance the nervous system. However, letting your body come in contact with the soil directly decreases anxiety and stress even more. That’s because the Earth carries a negative charge with it. And we have a positive charge due to all the electromagnetic waves we come in contact with daily, spending time connecting with Earth is vital to your emotional and physical health.

6. It helps normalize biological rhythms.

In the book Earthing by Clint Ober, Dr. Stephen Sinatra MD, and Martin Zucker, the authors explain that “…the biological clock of the body needs to be continually calibrated by the pulse of the Earth that governs the circadian rhythms of all life on the planet.”

Earthing helps to reestablish regular sleeping patterns and resets the biological clock within us all. Environmental pollution, including lights, chemicals, and other factors, greatly affects our sleeping patterns, so coming in contact with Earth’s negatively charged electrons can help immensely with your body’s circadian rhythm and other biological processes.

7. Walking barefoot can even lessen the severity of menstrual cramps!

Because grounding reduces overall pain, it should come as no surprise that walking barefoot can ease menstrual cramps, as well. In a sense, all pain we feel within the body first begins in the mind and manifests as stress, which can greatly impact menstrual cramps. Going outdoors and letting your bare feet grace the Earth does wonders for the body, mind, and soul. Pharmacies sell many pain pills specifically for women with cramps. But earthing provides the same benefits without the side effects. Plus, you’ll save a lot of cash!

8. Walking barefoot helps loosen tense muscles and even eliminate headaches.

A pilot study found that earthing can prevent delayed onset muscle soreness from occurring after engaging in physical exercise, so this can certainly apply to other situations that cause tense muscles, such as working at a desk all day, for example. Migraines have been linked in some instances to prolonged exposure to radiation, and since earthing literally grounds the body and reduces free radicals, it can alleviate headaches as well.

9. Earthing boosts energy levels.

This one might seem obvious by now, but it’s still worth mentioning. Any time you immerse yourself in the natural world, you pick up on the higher frequencies emitted from nature. Therefore, you increase your own energy levels. Exposure to modern society can definitely affect your vitality. So make sure to spend as much time in nature as you can!

10. It protects the body from dangerous EMFs (electromagnetic fields).

As we have touched on previously, earthing can reduce the electromagnetic charge within the body. Plus, it may prevent you from the harmful effects of EMF’s. For more information on the incredible ways that walking barefoot can improve your health, consider reading the book Earthing: The Most Important Health Discovery Ever?

In it, you will find studies and other information from doctors, an electrical engineer, and a cardiologist. Also, you will find first-hand stories about the benefits of earthing.

10 Signs Someone Is Depressed

July 5, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Depression is a troubling illness, both for the afflicted and those that care about them. Many times, the depressed doesn’t know why it’s happening; sometimes they think that it’s a personal failing or weakness.

Nothing could be farther from the truth.

Depression is a very complex disease that is often linked to biological, environmental, genetic, and psychological factors. In simplest terms, depression is a disorder of the brain. Imaging technologies such as Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) and positron emission tomography (PET) have discovered that the depressed brain is different in various functionalities than the normal brain.

The brain areas that are affected by depression include the Amygdala, Thalamus and the Hippocampus. The amygdala is associated with emotions such as anger, fear, pleasure, sorrow and sexual arousal. Studies have shown that the amygdala registers higher activity when a person is sad or clinically depressed; this likely accounts for the episodes of mania that people experience in manic depression.

The hippocampus is another limbic system structure that is responsible for processing long-term memory and recollection. Some studies have shown that the hippocampus is smaller in some depressed people and that continuous exposure to stress hormones can impair the growth of nerve cells in this region of the brain.

What causes this shift in the chemical functioning of the brain?

Many things, including psychological or physical trauma, relationship difficulties, loss of a loved one, or any other stressful situation may initiate these brain changes.

Regardless of the cause, it is important to be able to recognize depression – for your own health and those that you love and care for. There are certain behavioral traits that are quite common in depressed individuals and are worth being aware of.

Here are 10 common signs someone is depressed:

#1…Aloofness

When someone is depressed, they’re often reluctant to be in the company of others. Part of this is a lack of interest, and part is the fear of being the Debbie Downer of the group. There is also a fear of being rejected by others, which increases the reluctance to engage socially.

Here are some symptoms of aloofness:

– Few or no friends

– Labeled as newly “anti-social”

– Canceling social events at the last minute

– Avoiding face-to-face contact with others

– Friends, family, and others are concerned with lack of interaction

– Pessimism

– Low self-esteem

#2… Loss of Interest

This is a big one. Activities that used to bring such joy and fulfillment to the person no longer do. Needless to say, this is painful for both the individual and those who care for them. The afflicted person can even lose interest in their spouse or children, often leading to bigger problems.

It’s also worth mentioning that necessary but less engaging tasks (work, chores, etc.) become more arduous and are often ignored or done hastily.

#3…Increased Alcohol or Drug Use

Navigating the ups and downs of life is difficult enough, but for the depressed it is nearly impossible at times. To escape this trap, they often turn to the use of alcohol or drugs. Understandably, alcohol and drug use occurs because the person is seeking to numb their pain or feel the happiness that they long for. However, this only works for a short while and as tolerance increases so does the likelihood of addiction.

#4…Mood Swings

Chemical imbalances in the brain often lead to abrupt changes in mood. A depressed person can go from happy to crying to something else within a short span of time. Things and events that used to cause little to no reaction – a sarcastic joke, for example – now cause fits of anger or irritability. If someone you care about is demonstrating these sorts of changes, understand that it can be due to depression. Don’t judge too hastily, however; normal changes in hormones can lead to mood swings as well.

#5… Changes in Appetite

This is a tricky one because “changes in appetite” can be a depressed person not touching food on a plate (“are they not hungry?”) or someone scarfing a gallon of ice cream (“maybe they just feeling like binging…”) until it’s gone. The former doesn’t have the willingness to eat, as they are too busy attending to their thoughts while the latter uses food as much-needed source of comfort. Either way, drastic changes in appetite is often a clear sign of depression.

#6…Excessive Tiredness

A lethargic approach to many of one’s responsibilities is only natural for people lacking enthusiasm. People with depression constantly deal with the internal chatter of their minds, which is exhausting in itself. It is no wonder then why they have very little energy for anything else. Excessive states of tiredness could indicate the presence of depression.

#7…Sleep Problems

You may think that because of #6 a depressed person would have no issue with sleeping. As with many other depressive symptoms, however, sleep problems can vary widely. Some will sleep the majority of the day while others will skimp by on maybe a couple of hours if that. A drastic change in sleep patterns is often one of the more obvious signs of depression.

#8…Cognitive Problems

Depression is notorious for having an impact on cognitive function. Concentration, decision making and memory are often less adept than before the depressive state. Further, cognitive impairment is often very noticeable to the depressed and makes it more difficult for them to believe that they’ll ever be well again.

#9…Self Harm

At times, the pain that builds up in one’s mind becomes so intense that inflicting pain actually becomes a relief. Of course, this is a very serious sign of depression and one that requires immediate intervention.

#10…Suicidal Ideations

Unfortunately, this is one that needs to be discussed. Repetitive bouts with one’s inner self and the conflict that their depression creates have led the individual to believe that there truly is no way out, no matter how untrue those beliefs may be. Thought of suicide almost always indicates the presence of depression and professional help becomes absolutely necessary for their protection.

What to Do…

Witnessing someone that you love go through depression can indeed be a difficult experience. Exacerbating this difficulty is the feeling of helplessness that loved ones of depressed people often feel. Fortunately, there are indeed things that you can do to help the person get better and provide some emotional relief for yourself.

The Mayo Clinic, perhaps the most prestigious health organization in the world, recommends the following:

– Talk to the person about what you’ve noticed and why you’re concerned.

– Educate the person about depression. Explain that it is not a personal failing, flaw or weakness, but a medical condition that often gets better with treatment.

– Suggest that the person see a professional – a medical doctor or mental health providers, such as a licensed counselor or psychologist.

– Offer to help the person create an outline of what to talk about, including questions to ask during the initial appointment with the doctor or mental health provider.

– Express your willingness to aid the person with appointments. For example, help them with scheduling the appointment or going with them to see the doctor.

6 Ways to Open Your Heart and Love Again

July 3, 2015 by Power of Positivity

No matter how many times you have been hurt in the past, you probably still wonder when your next boyfriend or girlfriend will walk into your life. Why? Well, humans were born to love. We were born to connect with others and share a deep emotional and physical bond. Love can hurt, but it also is crucial for our well-being.

Studies have proven that love releases feel-good hormones, eases depression symptoms, increases your lifespan, reduces anxiety and stress, and much more.

After a few failed relationships, though, you might feel like throwing in the towel on love. Don’t worry; many people feel this way after just leaving a serious relationship, but if you’re looking to leave the past behind and give love another try, these tips can help.

Here are six ways to open your heart to love again:

1. Let go of past heartache.

As they say, you can’t get to the future if you remain fixated on the past, so release any feelings of resentment or pain and realize that you had to go through those experiences to evolve and learn. Simply ask the universe for help in moving on from the relationships that have caused you grief and accept the past for what it is: necessary stepping stones on your path to enlightenment and self-development.

Also, remember that only you can decide how you feel; others have power over your emotions only if you let them. Of course, everyone needs time to recuperate after a serious relationship emotionally, but just allow those feelings to move through you without judgment, and move on. Just try to enjoy living in the moment instead of ruminating on the past; after all, this moment is all we truly have.

2. Forgive others who have hurt you.

“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” – Katherine Ponder

Remember that holding a grudge is like injecting yourself with poison over and over again and expecting the other person to suffer. Resentment only affects the person who feels it, and it will hold a dark cloud over your head until you resolve those feelings.

Part of letting go of the past is forgiving those who have caused you pain, so either in person, in writing, or just in your head, offer your forgiveness to those people. Thank them for what you learned during your relationship, and wish them the best in their future. Then, you can finally free yourself from those emotional chains and truly open your heart to love again.

3. Don’t have any expectations going into future relationships.

Life hardly ever goes as expected, so having any anticipations about how it will unfold can lead to huge disappointments later on. No relationship will ever offer perfection, so don’t go into relationships with preconceived ideas about how your partner will react to a certain situation or how long the relationship will last. You can never entirely predict anything, from people to the weather, to what your life will be like even 5 minutes from now.

Just enjoy the ride and take life as it comes rather than wishing or demanding certain situations from life; remember, the universe will always give you what you need, even if that differs from what you want at the time.

4. Focus on loving yourself first, and you will attract others of the same vibration.

The actual first step to attracting someone who will love you is to cultivate that feeling within yourself. How can you expect others to love you if you don’t even feel that way toward yourself? We all give off a certain vibration, and others either become attracted or repelled to that energy based on their own frequency.

So, to attract those with a higher, more loving vibration, you must give off that energy yourself. You attract what you are, so keep this in mind when you feel ready to open yourself to love once again.

5. Don’t compare everyone you meet to your exes.

When you do meet a potential partner, you might feel inclined to figuratively put them beside your ex and compare every aspect of them to one another. However, this will only lead you to either harbor bitterness about your past relationship or believe that no one can ever offer you what your ex did. Both of these ways of thinking will only lead to despair, so save yourself from the unnecessary heartache by avoiding comparison altogether.

Every person offers something unique and valuable to the world, so just accept people as they are without needing to size them up and critique every part of them. Your ex will probably have traits you desire in a future partner, but instead of fixating on that, just focus on the possibilities that the future holds. Based on your vibration, you will eventually find your way to someone who deserves you.

6. Choose to see the positive aspects of people instead of putting all your attention on the negative.

One surefire way to close yourself off to love is to believe that everyone has bad intentions with you; remember, hate and negativity contract, while love and positivity expand. After a rough breakup, you will probably go through a phase of anger toward the person, which could lead you to see the worst in everyone you know and meet. However, try to remember that other people carry their own vibration and have a personality completely different from your ex’s.

Just because you had one bad relationship, doesn’t mean that this will repeat infinitely into the future.

Smile and focus on the beauty present in all human beings, and you will attract more people set on seeing the best in their fellow man and woman, as well.

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