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12 Steps to Being a Happier Person

June 10, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Many of us feel unhappy and disconnected daily. Sometimes even when we are doing our best, we get discouraged, wondering why we are not a happier person. The truth is, we often overlook some of the easiest ways to turn our frown upside down – our everyday habits. What we do consistently can make or break our happiness, no matter how good of a person we are.

Here are quick and straightforward tips (we often forget) that can add more happiness to our daily life.

12 Steps to Being a Happier Person:

1. Smile more and complain less.

Your smile is infectious! When people see your face light up, they’ll respond to you in kind. You’ll feel happier from this one small interaction. Plus, you’ll feel less impacted by daily stress.

2. Connect with people and friends.

Like most people, you likely have a support network of close friends. This circle serves as your boost when needed. Surround yourself with positive feedback from these connections. Some of us only have a few very close friends, and that’s okay, too! It’s all about the quality of the friendship and not the quantity.

3. Spend more time with a supportive family.

Do you have supportive family members? Rely on them to bolster your spirit on days that you need it!

One catch. You can’t choose your family members. To feel happier, remain closest to those who carry light and positivity instead of doom and gloom.

4. Help others in need.

You will love the feeling you get when you help others. Whether you’re a volunteer at a local soup kitchen or donating gently used clothing to a family in need, you’ll count your blessings. The act of volunteering makes you genuinely appreciate all the benefits in your life.

5. Be more optimistic about life and the way things will turn out.

Have an optimistic attitude. Assume that you’ll find a positive outcome at the end of each goal you set for yourself. Otherwise, accepting any less sets you up for a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure.

6. Plan a trip or a vacation.

Spend time in travel to renew and recharge your batteries. Getting a complete change of scenery will feel like hitting a “reset” button on your attitude. And, you’ll likely find fresh inspiration along the way.

7. Learn to forgive.

Carrying the albatross of anger and bitterness around your neck weighs you down. Let go of past hurts. But how? By forgiving. Even when the person truly doesn’t deserve the kindness, it will set you free of those bad feelings.

8. Set new goals and achieve them.

Setting goals helps us to grow. They give us something to work for–and we know that we will eventually benefit when we reach the outcome. You will feel happier knowing that you accomplished something important to you.

Goals can be career-related or personal. From taking the steps to a promotion at work to acting on a doctor’s advice to lower your blood pressure, you can do it!

Break the long-term goal into shorter steps or short-term goals. Write them down and check off your list as you accomplish each more concise goal. In the end, your diligence will pay you tenfold.

9. Do yoga or meditation.

Yoga and meditation proved through the centuries to offer both physical and mental benefits. A few of the outcomes of practicing these ancient arts are the following:

Stress relief
Reduction in inflammation in the joints
Improved flexibility
Better mental clarity
Enhanced sleep quality
Correction of posture

In short, you will feel happier because you’ll feel better!

10. Get a pet–and interact with the pet.

Pets soothe us after a long day at work and comfort us on our worst days. They love unconditionally and never judge us. Their devotion shows you the meaning of true love and makes you feel happier.

11. Get some time off of work.

Time off of work is essential to mental well-being. Not only do you need to free yourself of the physical act of performing your job each day, but you also need to clear your mind of your responsibility to your company mentally. Pressures like deadlines, negative co-workers, and things you can’t control wear on your nerves day-in and day-out.

The time off will help you fall back in love with your job again–or allow you to evaluate if you need to find a new career.

12. Do physical activities like walking or running.

Cardiovascular activities like running, walking, skiing, or even playing basketball are vital. This vigorous exercise releases a feel-good hormone that makes you feel happier, naturally. Ever hear the term runner’s high? It’s the result of that chemical reaction.

Additionally, you’ll improve your heart health and maybe even shed a few unwanted pounds.

5 Reasons to Stop Multitasking

June 10, 2015 by Power of Positivity

[dropcap]D[/dropcap]on’t blame yourself. It’s been subconsciously downloaded and wired into our brains that multitasking is good. Multitasking is for smart, capable people…the “go-getters.” Multitasking is efficient, saves time, and increases productivity, right? Wrong.

The truth is, the concept of multitasking is largely a myth.

Physiologically, the human brain is not designed to process more than one thing at a time. Actually, to be more specific, the human brain is incapable of effectively handling more than one task. What is actually taking place is the “switching” of one task to another. In other words, there is no “multi” anything going on. This switching from one task to another is actually harmful to the brain’s natural makeup.

Here are 5 reasons you may want to stop multitasking.

#1 Multitasking makes you less productive!

Well, that’s a bummer, isn’t it? I mean, being productive is reason numero uno why many people do it in the first place.

According to the American Psychological Association – the largest scientific and professional organization of psychologists in the United States – multitasking creates mental blocks that can result in as much as a 40 percent loss in production time.

Instead, choose to prioritize your workday. Identify the most important things to get done for the day and then simply do them one at a time. Remember: time management isn’t about getting more done in less time; it’s about completing the most important things effectively.

#2 Multitasking is stressing you out!

When you multitask on a regular basis, your brain releases a chemical called cortisol which, if chronic, can make you susceptible to heart disease, weight gain, high blood pressure, and diabetes.

In a study at the University of California Irvine, one group of employees was given access to email and messaging while the other group was not. The group that received a regular influx of messages displayed higher blood pressure and heart rates when compared to the other group.

Further, mental health issues can arise from multitasking as well. Researchers believe this is related to poor outcomes (on work, tests, etc.) as a result of multitasking. These unintended consequences can result in self-esteem issues and even depression.

#3 Multitasking is hurting your work!

Multitasking has a detrimental effect on the quality of work performed. Even routine tasks, such as driving a car, are performed with less precision when doing something else.

Consider this study synopsis by the University of Utah:

We used a…driving simulator to compare the performance with cell-phone drivers with (those) who were legally intoxicated from ethanol (alcohol). When…conversing on either a hand-held or hands-free cell phone, their reactions were sluggish… (the cell phone group) attempted to compensate by driving slower and increasing the distance from the vehicle immediately in front of them. When controlling for driving difficulty and time on task, cell phone drivers exhibited greater impairment than intoxicated drivers.

One expert summarizes this predicament quite well:

“Multitasking is the worst way to try and get lots of things done…it’s contrary to human psychology. We do best when we concentrate on one task at a time. It’s also insulting to the work (and the person who assigned it), because it indicates that the task doesn’t deserve our complete attention.”

Quite simply: to do your best work, Single-task!

#4 Multitasking makes you miss out on life!

Adding to its already abysmal record, multitasking makes it impossible to remain present. In addition, the harm that multitasking causes to your brain, it is quite possible that multitasking is hurting your relationships as well.

You may even notice it within your family. Have you ever been talking with your child only to have them pull out their iPhones? How about when speaking with your husband or wife only to see them dart for their Blackberry? “I have to check some work stuff,” they say.

Present-mindedness is not something that is practiced often in our society. Even before the advent of iPhones and other mobile devices, people were still preoccupied with work and meeting the demands of their schedule.

But how can we overcome all of these distractions and simply be present with others? Try out the “5 Senses Rule.” It goes something like this:

Do not (consciously) look at, listen to, touch, smell, or taste (eat) while interacting with someone. Even if the other person does otherwise. The basis of this practice is to give full attention to a person or task.

#5 Multitasking makes you dumber!

In a study conducted at Hewlett-Packard, researchers discovered something interesting: excessive use of technology decreases your intelligence. Here are some interesting finds from the study:

62% of people checked work messages at home or on vacation.
Workers distracted by incoming calls and messages experienced a 10-point drop in IQ – more than twice the impact of smoking marijuana.
Researchers equated the drop in mental sharpness as a result of technology overload to losing a full night’s sleep.

So what is the answer? Single-tasking!

As with any other bad habit, multitasking can be overcome. Of course, you still want to maintain that productivity…and you can! The simple solution is to single-task. Here’s how productivity and Zen expert Leo Babauta breaks down the practice of single-tasking:

Keep a shortlist ( no more than three or so) of the most important things to do today (MIT’s, or “Most Important Tasks).
Do not do anything else before completing MIT’s. No Facebook, email, Twitter, etc.
Clear away distractions. Turn off cell phones, incoming emails, TV, etc.
One task at a time. Focus only on one task until it’s done and then move on.
When feeling a loss of focus, gently bring your attention back to the task at hand.
Keep going on your MIT’s. Resist the urge to do less important stuff.
When important thoughts arise, write them down and store them away for later.
Remember to take short breaks, relax, stretch, etc. while completing the important work

With a little bit of work and dedication, you can make yourself into an excellent, productive single tasker! Remember: keep the distractions to a minimum and focus on what’s most important!

15 Things to Remember When Dealing With Problems

June 7, 2015 by Power of Positivity

We want to think of ourselves in control of our lives, but the reality is, we aren’t. We can take action to move us in the right direction, and we can do everything according to plan and yet problems happen that will have us questioning everything around us.

The only thing we have the ability to control is our reaction to the events of our day, whether expected or unexpected. And the best way to control our reaction is to put things into perspective by asking these 15 questions when problems occur.

Remember These 15 Questions When Dealing With Problems

1 – Did you try your best to solve the problem?

When things go against the plan, the first person you tend to blame is yourself. If you can say you put forth your best effort, then most likely there are other factors in play. Don’t blame yourself needlessly.

2 – If you had the same information, would you make the same choice?

Your responsibility is to make the best choices with the information you have at the time. As long as you are doing that, you are doing our part. When a problem arises, new information is available and it is up to you to make the best choice under these new circumstances.

3 – Would you rather do things right, or do the right things?

Plans change, and information changes and that means doing the right thing might change too. Don’t stick to a list of things to do just because it is the original plan. Challenge the plan when better opportunities make themselves available.

4 – What do success and failure mean to you?

Success means different things to different people. It is up to you to understand what it means to you. Don’t base the wins you achieve and the challenges you encounter on someone else’s ideas of success or failure.

5 – Are you asking enough questions?

It is easy to think we know things. In fact, we don’t know what we don’t know. And the only way to learn is to ask questions. Ask questions, until you see the completed vision and each of the steps needed to get there clearly in your mind.

6 – Five years from now will this problem matter?

This is a great question to put things into perspective. Often in the midst of problems, the problem itself takes on a life of its own. Remember, it is not the problem or the challenge that you should be focusing on, it’s the solution.

7 – If you had to explain this problem to a large group of people, what would you say?

Sometimes, stepping out of the problem and presenting it in a logical way will help you get past the emotion of the moment and see possible solutions.

8 – Would you allow a stranger to speak to you the way you are speaking to you right now?

Probably not. Hold yourself to a higher standard when speaking to yourself. If you can’t be kind to yourself, how can you be kind to others?

9 – What are you holding onto that you need to let go?

Many times your reaction, or over-reaction, to problems and challenges come from some other issue in your past. Evaluate whether this problem is really the cause of your reaction or is the reaction coming from somewhere else?

10 – Do you surround yourself with unnecessary things?

Life is complicated enough without finding ways to add to it. Simplifying your life and eliminating unnecessary things, makes it easier to handle challenges and move through them.

11 – Would you rather worry or act?

Here’s the thing, worrying prevents action and action solves problems. Have you ever solved a problem by worrying? When you find yourself worrying, change your thoughts of worry into thoughts of action and then do something. The simple act of doing will help bring more clarity.

12 – If you left this life tomorrow, how would you be remembered?

When you take action to solve a problem or simply to enjoy life, is it the action that will make you proud. We have all been in situations where our reactions to problems have brought out behaviors that do not show us in the best light. Before acting, make sure you are okay with being remembered for that action.

13 – What makes you happy?

Sometimes stepping away from a problem and doing something for pure pleasure can help bring perspective and ideas to a challenge. It is important to foster your happy self so you can do your best work.

14 – What gives your life meaning?

This is different than the happy question; this is more about what work makes you proud. Do the challenges you are encountering right now support your life’s meaning? If not, don’t treat them like they do.

15 – What is the worst that can happen?

This is the best question of all time. Seriously, what is the worst that can happen? Chances are the worst that can happen will end up not happening at all.

Most of these questions are designed to help put problems and challenges into perspective. It is your perspective that makes the issue bigger than it is and allows your emotions to get attached. When you put the problem into perspective, you can figure out the best next steps. The goal is to keep questioning.

10 Tips for Morning Motivation

June 7, 2015 by Power of Positivity

[dropcap]D[/dropcap]o you ever roll out of bed in the morning, sleepily pour yourself some coffee, and wish you could just crawl back under the covers and sleep away your responsibilities? We’ve all been there at some point, dreaming about a day when we could feel motivated and excited about our lives.

While life isn’t always smooth-sailing, these tips can help you stay encouraged on those days when you just wish life could take a backseat for a while.

10 Tips For Morning Motivation

1. Remember your “why.”

When you wake up in the morning, remind yourself why you will carry out your day in the way you have planned. It helps to keep that mental image in our heads of why we do certain things, so that we don’t operate on autopilot and forget our ultimate reasoning for going to work, school, or whatever we have going on. With that said, if you don’t feel inspired or fulfilled by what takes up the majority of your life, you should definitely think about leaving your current job or career path behind in favor of one that will truly make your heart feel full and happy.

2. Meditate when you first wake up.

As you awaken, you haven’t yet encountered all of the daily stressors and chaos that inevitably cross our paths in daily life. Mother Earth is still waking from her slumber as well, and the world is much quieter than at any other time of the day. Use this time to go to a peaceful spot in your home or in your backyard, and just allow yourself to relax and balance your energies. This will help set the stage for a positive, productive, and motivating day, and will assist you in dealing with any stress you encounter.

3. Exercise before you begin your day.

Morning exercise revs up your metabolism and wakes up your entire body, getting you pumped up for your work or school day. Many scientists agree that working out first thing in the morning on an empty stomach promotes weight loss and prevents weight gain as well, but it might suit some people better to eat a small breakfast before beginning their workout routine. Follow whatever method works for you, just remember to engage in an activity you enjoy and get your blood pumping!

4. Get a good night’s rest.

Of course, getting a poor sleep will just make you feel like slipping back under your covers, not meeting life head-on. You can’t function properly without getting a restful sleep, so make sure you go to bed at a decent hour and get rid of any distractions in your room. Lights from electronics can disrupt your circadian rhythm and keep you awake for longer hours, so make sure to turn off all your devices before nightfall.

This might seem difficult in practice, but just try it out tonight before bed and see how much better you feel when you wake up the next morning. Instead of using electronics for entertainment, try reading a book, playing a board game with family, or doing arts and crafts. Facebook, emails, tweets, and texts can always wait until morning when you have had a chance to rest your mind and body.

5. Eat a healthy, balanced breakfast.

When you wake up each morning, make sure you have a nutritious breakfast of something like a fruity smoothie, oatmeal, whole fruits, or maybe a green juice. Having the essential vitamins and minerals in your bloodstream will give you the energy to tackle everything in your day, and will help keep your blood sugar under control.

Many people either skip breakfast or eat sugary, nutrient-lacking foods that spike their insulin, leaving them feeling lethargic and unmotivated to do much of anything. Go for whole, fresh, ripe fruits and veggies or starches to give your body the energy it craves. J

6. Start off your day with a glass of lemon water.

Lemon water offers a slew of benefits, from fighting off colds to boosting the immune system to promoting weight loss, so pour yourself a nice, cold glass in the morning with a couple of slices of lemon added in. Not only will the tart, zesty flavor from the lemon wake you up, but the vitamins from the citrus fruit will invigorate you and get you excited for your day.

7. Have a list of small, achievable goals to look at each morning.

This goes back to the first point about remembering your why; you need to have your most important goals written out to refer back to often, so you can have a constant reminder of what you wish to accomplish in this crazy game of life. We often get sidetracked with all the distractions we face, which pushes our original motivations and aspirations to the back burner. Make sure you have a list somewhere in your room that you can consult often about your goals, and try to work toward them in some way each day.

8. Change up your routine.

Sometimes, we can feel stuck in a rut when we do the same things day in and day out. Take a different route to work, eat something unordinary for lunch, or go on a nature retreat to somewhere you’ve never been before. Adding variety into your life will help keep your motivation up; this way, you won’t risk burning out or falling into a state of complacency.

9. Work smarter, not harder.

Long work hours don’t do a body or mind good; if you can, try to get more work done in less time so that you have a portion of your day to allot to other activities, like working out, meeting up with friends, relaxing in nature, and just recharging. In Japan, people actually die from overworking; the term they use there for it is karoshi. This affects many people there, so obviously working to the point of mental and physical exhaustion does not have a positive outcome. Make sure you balance your work with your life for optimal health and happiness.

10. Say a few mantras that will get you in a positive mindset.

When you first wake up, say a favorite motivational quote of yours either aloud or in your head; this helps to start your day off positively and will inspire you if you wake up feeling discouraged.

10 Mind Blowing Facts About the Human Brain

June 6, 2015 by Power of Positivity

The human brain is by far the most complex and misunderstood organ in the body. It contains over 100 billion nerve cells. Furthermore, it generates roughly 70,000 thoughts per day in the average brain. In our brains, memories are stored, thoughts are created, experiences are perceived, and visions turn into actions. New pathways, or synapses, form each time we learn something new. So in this sense, we most certainly create our own realities based upon our thoughts and experiences most often.

These facts just barely scratch the surface when it comes to amazing discoveries about the human brain. However, they perfectly demonstrate the incredible power and intricacy of the most important organ in the human body.

Here are 10 Facts About the Human Mind That Will Amaze You (#8 Is Incredible!)

1. Introverts and extroverts have actual differences in the wiring of their brains.

Our genetic makeup has a lot to do with what type of personality we will have, according to research. However, the degree of introversion or extroversion you exhibit has less to do with personality traits. Instead, it has more to do with where you obtain your energy and how you react to stimuli.

For example, an experiment scanned the brains of the participants while they took gambles. The experiment’s findings uncovered that successful gambles provoked a stronger response in two regions of extroverts’ brains: the amygdala and the nucleus accumbens.

The latter area of the brain releases the chemical called dopamine into the body when we feel good, for lack of a better term, and the dopamine system in the extrovert’s brain encourages them to take more risks and get out of their comfort zone more often.

The amygdala processes emotional stimuli, which means that while extroverts feel a rush of excitement when trying something new, introverts feel easily overwhelmed and nervous.

In a book titled “The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World” by psychologist Marti Olsen Laney, she explains that introverts and extroverts have different pathways through which stimuli travel through the brain. Extroverts have much shorter pathways than introverts. This might explain why introverts tend to be more critically thinking, analytical, logical, and take more time to register stimuli.

2. Your brain generates about 25 watts of power at any given time, enough to power a lightbulb.

3. Stress can actually decrease the size of the organ.

Chronic stress causes the most significant and lasting changes in the brain, by far, but did you know it can actually shrink your brain? One study confirmed that the hippocampus in the brains of rats actually shrank after exposure to chronic stress. The hippocampus is responsible for storing memories, which means that people with a smaller hippocampus may have difficulty recalling certain memories.

4. Despite the rise of multitasking in today’s world, our brains physically cannot process two tasks at the same time.

While corporate executives and teachers might encourage multitasking, this is literally impossible to do based on how our brain really works. Multitasking, in the true sense of the word, means doing two or more things at once. However, our brains only know how to context-switch or switch between tasks quickly.

For some reason, many people seem to believe that multitasking means getting more done in a shorter amount of time when really, we are just switching back and forth between tasks, which doesn’t reduce the time it takes to complete them. On the other hand, it actually doubles how long it takes to get things done, while increasing our error rate by 50 percent, according to the book “Brain Rules.”

The idea behind this is simple: when you split your brain’s resources, you aren’t giving your full attention to the tasks at hand, therefore increasing the number of errors that will inevitably occur. Simply put, our brain wasn’t designed for multitasking, because in our natural environment, attempting to run from a predator while also foraging for food, for example, would have gotten us killed. Just some food for thought.

The organ also generates more electrical impulses in a single day than all the telephones in the world!

5. Your brain has over 100,000 miles of axons. That’s enough to wrap around the Earth 4 times.

6. There is no left/right brain divide, according to some research.

The myth goes like this: left-brained people are more logical, methodical and analytical, while right-brained people are more creative and artistic. While the preference to use one specific region over another for certain tasks, such as public speaking, does exist, there’s no line separating the two regions. Also, the connections between all regions of the brain help to support both analytical thinking and creativity. One side doesn’t dominate the other in either process.

Dr. Jeff Anderson, director of the MRI Neurosurgical Mapping Service at the University of Utah, performed an experiment to test the left brain/right brain theory: his team examined the scans of participants ranging from age 7 to 29 while they rested. For the experiment, they studied activity in 7,000 brain regions and looked at neural connections within and between these regions. Although they saw isolated incidences of heavy neural traffic in certain key regions, on average, participants seemed to use both sides of their brains fairly equally.

7. Experts estimate that, over the course of a lifetime, modern human brains will retain up to 1 quadrillion pieces of information.

8. Information can travel between nerve cells in your brain at speeds of 260 mph! (faster than most race cars)

9. Every second, more than 100,000 chemical reactions occur within the brain.

10. Half of the organ could be surgically removed with no adverse effects on personality or memory.

10 Ways To Tell If You’re In A Mature Relationship

June 5, 2015 by Power of Positivity

We grow up with an idea of what the perfect relationship looks like. We dream of the fairy tale. Unfortunately, the fairy tale is just a tale and our expectations for what a real relationship looks like are shaped by the shows we watch, the magazines we read and the music we listen to.

These influences often depict an unrealistic view of what being in a meaningful relationship means. When you are in a healthy and mature relationship you have space to grow as an individual and as a couple. You continue to learn new things by yourself as well as together and you are confident in yourself and your partnership.

Being in the right relationship combines the best of who you are with the best of someone else to create a force that is magical.

Here are 10 ways to tell if you’re in a mature relationship:

1 – You Maintain Individual Interests

Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean you lose your individual identity. The things that made you attractive to your partner should continue to make you attractive to him. That means maintaining the things that bring you joy.

2 – You Develop New Interests as a Couple That You Both Enjoy

Entering a partnership requires compromise and creating space for new activities that you can do together. Developing interests you can do together and sharing new experiences will bring you closer and allow you to grow in your relationship.

3 – People Like You Together

If your relationship is serving both you and your partner, then it will show through your actions and your attitude. The people around you will notice a new sense of confidence and higher self-esteem about you and will like the “new” you and the relationship.

4 – You Fight Fair

Fighting fair is about understanding your partner’s point of view and compromising in finding common ground. It isn’t about winning or even making a point; it’s about taking an issue you disagree on and finding a way to move forward in a way you both can live with.

5 – You Have a Similar Vision for The Future

It’s hard to plan a future life together if your vision for what that looks like differs from one another. You must be on the same page from the beginning because believing your partner will come around to your way of thinking will just lead to disappointment and frustration down the road.

6 – You Don’t Feel The Need to Change Your Partner

Being in a mature relationship means accepting each other as you are. Sure we all have quirky traits but we learn to accept them as part of the bigger package. The time you spend to trying to change your partner would be better spent finding the right partner.

7 – You Share a Group of Friends but Also Have “Your” Friends

Similar to maintaining individual interests, it’s important to maintain your friends. These are the people that know you, that help heal you and support you and they are important. Do not feel you have to choose between your friends and your partner because doing so will damage both relationships.

8 – You Make Each Other Better

Your individual interests should serve as an inspiration for each other. Your relationships should not only make you better, but it should also make you want to be better. When you are in a relationship that serves you, you increase your natural energy so that anything seems possible.

9 – You Enjoy Your Time Alone as Much as You Do Your Time Together

Healthy and strong relationships are not threatened by time apart. Of course in the initial phases of any relationship, you can’t seem to spend enough time together. Just remember your time alone is how your soul recharges. You should want that space where you can process and enjoy what is good in your life.

10 – There Are No Secrets

When you are in a mature relationship, you feel supported in sharing information about events that have shaped you. You feel comfortable talking about money, past transgressions and the lessons you learned along the way. You know that your partner won’t judge you, nor will you judge them and it will only help to strengthen the relationship and deepen the bond.

Of course, this list is not comprehensive and there are many other ways to determine if we are in a mature relationship. The biggest thing we need to pay attention to is how the relationship is making us feel. Does it make you feel whole, supported and good? Then chances are you in a good relationship.

Do yourself a favor and keep checking in on your feelings and observe how you and others react to your relationship. In the end, keep your eyes open and remember at some point you have to trust that the relationship is the right one. Constant doubt will only undermine the goodness in it.

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