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Seattle Seahawks QB Uses Power of Positivity to Prepare for Super Bowl

The Super Bowl – the annual championship game of the National Football League – is considered the preeminent sports event of the year. The pageantry of the event goes far beyond just the game. Superstar performances at halftime, millions of dollars spent on 30-second television commercials, and celebrity appearances are all hallmarks of the extravaganza. Last year, an estimated 169 million people watched as the Seattle Seahawks blew out the Denver Broncos 43-8 to win Super Bowl 47. One player instrumental to the Seattle’s incredible performance was Russell Wilson, the 3rd year star quarterback. Wilson completed 72% of his passes for 206 years and 2 touchdowns.

Wilson’s achievements go far beyond being a Super Bowl champion

The 26-year old is a 2-time Pro Bowl selection, 2-time NFC champion, and was the NFL Rookie of the Year in 2012. One award that often goes unnoticed is his 2014 Pro Football Writers Association ‘Good Guy’ Award, given to one NFL player “for his qualities and professional style in helping pro football writers do their jobs.”

Of course, Wilson has been helping people do their jobs for years, namely his teammates. In addition to being an outstanding and inspired leader on the field, he’s also an outstanding person once off the turf. Much of this can be traced to his upbringing as a child…and his genetics.

Wilson’s father, Harrison Wilson III, was a Dartmouth alum and lawyer, perhaps explaining his son’s cerebral approach to the game. He was also a strict disciplinarian that taught Russell the importance of hard work and dedication, perhaps explaining his son’s tireless work ethic and commitment on the field. Wilson attributes much of his success to his father, and it is easy to see why. Then there’s his uncharacteristically positive image off of the field.

“My husband always told the boys if there’s any kind of business situation, wear a suit and wear a tie,” says Russell’s mother, Tammy, “That’s why Russell is very adamant about taking a shower and being well groomed after a game before he does his press conference.” This likely explains Wilson’s utmost professionalism and thoughtful demeanor.

Sure, anyone can be successful when their thoughtful, intelligent, disciplined, and hard-working. But what about when the going gets tough… really tough? Can that positive, enthusiastic disposition possibly be evident in such a situation?

Fast forward to the 2014 NFC Championship game… with his team trailing 19-7 against the Green Bay Packers, Wilson threw his fourth interception of the game. By all accounts, this was possibly the young star’s worst game of his career. The game was all but over at this point, with many fans heading to the stadium’s exits and Seahawk’s players looking dejected, many of them with faces buried in gloved hands …and then there was Russell Wilson.

“I truly believe in positive synergy, that your positive mindset gives you a more hopeful outlook, and believe that you can do something great means you will do something great.” – Russell Wilson

“Hey! We can still win this game!” “We can win this game. We can win this game! Stay in it! We can still win this game!” Even if nobody in particular was listening (or believing) to what their quarterback was proclaiming, Wilson believed. And that’s all that ended up mattering.

There was the heads-up touchdown pass to running back Marshawn Lynch. Then he ran one in for a touchdown. Then he scrambled on a seemingly impossible play and completed a pass to the opposite side of the field for a 2-point conversion. This was before he threw two long, perfectly thrown balls to win the game in overtime. Final score: Seahawks 28, Packers 22.

Make no mistake about it – Russell Wilson has some incredible physical talent. He is also one of the most mentally tough (and smartest) football players in the game today. However, this is not what makes Russell Wilson truly great – it’s his attitude – his positive, energetic, enthusiastic mentality that seemingly takes over football games. Wilson believes in himself, but he also believes that positive thinking can make others believe in themselves.

Pete Carroll, Seattle Seahawks head coach: “I think that he’s very, very special. I don’t know how he could play at the level he plays at and have the expectations and be able to live up to those expectations in the most challenging times without having a tremendous mind.”

Mark Rodgers, Wilson’s agent: “The (Packers game) wasn’t half-empty, it was totally empty for a drop at the bottom of the glass…and to stay positive and stay focused, that (he) would change the game. He was on the sidelines preparing his teammates for that moment and they could’ve been down on themselves, but instead Russell was thinking about what was going to win the game, and now how they were going to lose.”

This relentlessly positive mentality has allowed Wilson to work harder, achieve more, and to become the truly special player and person that he is today. The fact that he may win a 2nd Super Bowl trophy in just his 3rd year in the league is attributed almost solely to his outstanding, undefeatable, and positive mindset.

Final Thoughts on Russell Wilson and the Seattle Seahawks

Wilson will lead his team onto the field Sunday to battle the New England Patriots in Super Bowl 48. The debate has raged on who will win that game, with the Seahawks being the slight favorites. One thing that is not being debated: that the Patriots had better keep a close eye on #3, no matter the score.

7 Ways to Find Your Flow and Flourish

Contrary to what you hear on the mainstream news these days, life isn’t meant to be a constant tooth-and-nail fight to the finish. Humans came here to thrive, not struggle. If we tap into the right energy, we will get swept up by the natural flow of the universal and discover that life seems so simple once we stop resisting.

If you feel unhappy or confused about life, consider the following strategies for learning how to “find your flow” and tap into your own personal superpowers!

7 Ways to Find Your Flow and Flourish:

1. Visualize what you want your life to look like.

Before anything begins to manifest in the physical realm, you must first envision what your dream life would consist of. The idea that the reality we see every day begins as vibrational energy held at the same frequency for an extended period of time before it exists physically has been coined “The Law of Attraction.” This elusive concept seems foreign to many people, but it becomes easier to understand if you break it down in laymen’s terms.

Basically, what you repeatedly think becomes what you repeatedly do, and all of this determines what reality you see every day. To live a life you really want, you must align your thoughts and actions with the reality you seek. The energy you put out into the world comes back to you, so make sure you pay attention to your thoughts; you’re subconsciously creating your reality at this very moment with your mind!

2. Buy a vision board and write down your goals.

Ask yourself these five questions:

  • What do I want to do with my life?
  • Can I identify my unique talents?
  • What makes me happy?
  • How can I get from where I am now to where I want to be?
  • How much money do I need to live how I want to?

vision board

Write down your answers to these questions, and keep the board somewhere clearly visible to you. In particular, pay attention to your answer to #4. Your response to this will determine the answers to all of the other questions because where you want to be likely includes more money, happiness, and a fulfilling career already.

Now, you just need to create actionable goals with a clear timeline, work on your goals every day, and see your life vision transform into manifestation!

3. Follow the lead of the Universe

In the book “Into the Wind” by Jake Ducey, he travels the world with $8,000 and no plan other than to follow the flow, help others, and find himself. He accomplished all three of these things, but he allowed himself to be carried by the powerful jet stream of the universe and didn’t ever doubt where it was taking him or what plans it had for him in the future. He surrendered to the natural order of the world and tested the power of the human spirit in the process. You can do exactly what he did in your own special way, but you must believe that you came here for a purpose.

follow the flow

The source-of-all, Spirit, God, or whatever you prefer to call it, can co-create your reality if you choose to open yourself up to infinite possibilities.

4. Limit your technology use.

Phones and computers offer great resources for learning new concepts, but spending time without it will help your creativity flourish. Technology tends to stifle inner growth because it becomes addicting after a while, and takes away our power to think and create independently. Think about it – how many times do you check emails, Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter each day? Probably more than you can count, if you’re like most people.

limit your technology use

Instead of mindlessly scrolling through the social networks, use that time to cultivate your passions and work on yourself. Your life will become much more meaningful and gratifying to you once you dig deep and use your passions to create a life you truly love.

5. Get your creative juices flowing.

If you want to become an active creator in your life, rather than just a spectator, you will have to use your imagination to get things started. It might seem a little strange at first to use your creative energy, because our world runs on mostly left-brained, linear thinking. However, find an activity you enjoy that makes you come alive with boundless inventive energy, such as yoga, writing, painting, dancing, rock-climbing, or anything else you can think of. Just immerse yourself in some sort of activity that requires more doing rather than thinking. Too much thinking encourages stagnation, whereas doing inspires new ideas through movement.

find your flow

6. Give your mind and body adequate rest.

Working on your life requires a lot of energy, especially in the beginning, so make sure you get at least 7-8 hours of sleep every night so you can recharge your batteries. Finding your flow has just as much to do with proper self-care as it does with setting intentions and taking action.

For example, you could tune up your car and install the highest-powered engine in the world, but if you run your car into the ground, the engine does no good. Your body and mind need some R&R if you want them to run optimally and help you in your quest to become your best self.

7. Try things you thought you couldn’t do.

Take a speaking class, go skydiving, talk to strangers, attempt to stand on your head, or try eating totally raw foods for a week. Do things you previously thought were impossible, and make them possible. You will grow your confidence exponentially by getting uncomfortable often, and it will help you evolve creatively as well. You will begin to see the full spectrum of your potential, and develop the “yes” mentality about life that the universe has wanted you to have all along!

8 Ways to Stop the Silly Things from Stealing Your Happiness

Do you feel like happiness eludes you? Are you known as a chronic worrywart among your friends and family, who always makes fun of you for thinking of the worst-case scenario?

Maybe people know you as having a short fuse because you get angry easily. All of us have certain dispositions that drive our overarching behaviors and feelings, but those inherent personality traits don’t have to rule our entire lives.

A lot of people sweat the small stuff because they have simply picked up bad habits, or let the negative energy of the world get inside of them. However, overreacting or feeding off of negativity becomes taxing on our minds and bodies, and can even lead to chronic stress, heart attacks, and other health problems. If you want to stop letting little things affect your happiness, start by following these simple tips.

8 Ways to Stop the Silly Things from Stealing Your Happiness:

1. Don’t make a problem bigger than it really is.

So, the barista at your favorite coffee shop made a hazelnut latte instead of white chocolate mocha. Does that mean your whole day is ruined? Of course not. People make mistakes sometimes; they wouldn’t be human if they didn’t. Instead of overreacting, just point it out to him or her and say you understand – you could even make a joke about it to lighten the mood.

Remember, this whole human experience naturally comes with imperfections and disorder, because life is simply an experiment. We all came here to learn and grow, and that involves failing, making mistakes, and adjusting to whatever happens.

2. Take your mind away from the problem.

Any time something happens that could adversely affect your mood, immediately do something else to take your mind off of it. This might seem irresponsible, but it actually shows great accountability for your own well-being. It means you will come back to the issue later when it seems stale and less serious.

Put on some happy music and dance around your house, even for just a few minutes. Then, come back to the problem and see if you feel the same way about it that you did before. Chances are, everything will seem way less serious, and you will probably find a solution much faster since you have given yourself a chance to cool off and regroup.

3. Remember that life is fleeting.

Do you really want to spend the majority of your time worrying about trivial matters that steal your joy? Probably not. So, zoom out and look at the bigger picture. We only have a limited amount of time here in these bodies, having this human experience. Why waste it fixating on problems that we create in our heads? Most problems don’t even exist unless we draw our attention to them.

life is fleeting

Remember that bills, money, jobs, possessions, and disagreements are all temporary. Focus on what really matters, and forget about all the distractions that detract from your happiness.

4. Adjust your attitude.

“The problem isn’t the problem, it’s your attitude about the problem.” – Ann Brashares

We assign labels to experiences based on our perceptions of them. For example, if we identify something as “bad,” it becomes a problem, which means we have subconsciously deemed that experience as undesirable. So, if we don’t desire it, why give it any more attention than it deserves?

happiness quotes

Move on from the issue, and look at it as a challenge overcome rather than a lingering annoyance in your life. If you become irritated easily, you need to look within and see what energetic blockages you need to chip away at in order to let more happiness into your life.

5. Eliminate major stressors in your life.

If you have a lot of minor problems in your life, you probably have bigger issues that contribute to these smaller complications. Think of it like a tree: the trunk connects to lots of smaller branches that stem from the biggest part of the tree. The roots give life to the tree itself, giving it support to grow. In just the same way, your thoughts represent seeds, and the quality of seeds you plant determines how the tree (actions) will manifest in your life. If you have a lot of happiness in your life, the trunk of the tree symbolizes the greatest source of your fulfillment, and this joy results in other, smaller opportunities for happiness to arise.

stress in life

If you have a cloud of darkness over your head, however, you need to figure out the predominant stressor, or problem, in your life, and come up with ways to solve it. This way, you can eliminate the smaller issues as well, and allow thriving trees (situations) into your life instead.

6. Simplify your life.

Maybe you have a lot of obligations, too much stuff cluttering your space, or complicated love life. Whatever the case might be, try to live as simply as you can. Whittle down your commitments and daily to-do list until it becomes more manageable. Get rid of extra possessions that you don’t use any more, and keep relationships in your life that serve your best interest. Leading a simple life eradicates the breeding grounds for silly problems.

happiness - simplify your life

7. Talk about the problems with someone.

Maybe these small issues have been ongoing for quite some time, and you need someone else’s point of view to put things into perspective. Even if you feel like these problems don’t warrant getting another person involved, sometimes we just need to vent so we can clear our heads and move on from the situation. Talking about what bothers you with others can give you support and help you regain clarity in times of distress.

8. Help someone with bigger problems than you.

Offering our hearts and hands to those less fortunate can easily snap us back into reality once we see the incredible challenges others face just to make it through the day. Volunteer your time to help those who need food, shelter, or water, and that will quickly dissolve any problems you thought you had. As a society, we complain about inconsequential problems right and left, but some people struggle just to survive each day. Try to alleviate problems for other people, and yours won’t seem so serious anymore.

Join the discussion: How do you avoid letting the trivial stressors of life take your happiness?  Share in the conversation below!

How to Find Peace of Mind During a Meltdown

No one really enjoys the feared “meltdown” situations – they drain you of vital energy, make you feel out of control, and strip you of any feelings of contentment. Most people know how to recover from a meltdown, or even avoid them…but finding peace of mind during a meltdown? Well, that’s almost unheard of. That’s why we’re going to talk about it here today because you can actually find peace even in times of extreme anguish. Here are a few things to keep in mind during one of those “nuclear situations”:

3 Ways to Regain Peace of Mind During a Meltdown

1 – Give Into Your Feelings

Wait, isn’t that counterproductive? I know it seems like the exact opposite of what you should do, but fighting your feelings will only make the situation spiral even further out of control. Sometimes, you just need to let out all the emotions you have bottled up inside of you, and accept the moment as it is.

Society pushes us to always keep our composure no matter what, never fall down, and, heaven forbid, never show any human emotions because it makes us weak. However, going through a very difficult time emotionally will make you stronger in the end. Showing emotions doesn’t make you any less of a person; it actually makes you a person. Part of this human experience means accepting that sometimes, life may seem incredibly overwhelming and scary. Instead of beating yourself up about how you feel and trying to stuff your emotions back down where they came from, just let them out and accept them.

You could even go a step further and celebrate them. Hold on…why would a breakdown be a cause for celebration? Because it means you have felt the highest joy at one point in your life to even be able to acknowledge feelings of despair and pain. Almost every self-help book you read, whether by Eckhart Tolle, Wayne Dyer, or Deepak Chopra, will tell you that the key to overcoming your feelings is just to simply accept them. The more you fight them, the farther down the hole you will fall. Resistance causes suffering, plain and simple. Once you accept how you feel in the present moment and allow the emotions to move through you, you will find the most overwhelming sense of serenity.

2 – Talk About Your Feelings

We live in a highly automated society that seems to focus on productivity and perfection, but our feelings often get pushed to the wayside. People expect you to deal with your emotions on your own, and quickly get back to your “human duties.” Feelings seem to be losing popularity in favor of facts, performance, and results. However, as long as we’re human, we will have a heart, a brain, and therefore…feelings.

You can’t hide them or pretend they don’t exist, so you may as well talk about them with someone you trust and who cares about you. No one can handle everything on their own, and you shouldn’t be expected to. If you feel that the walls are closing in on you and you can’t find the way out, reach out to a close friend or loved one who can sit and listen to what you’ve been going through.

negative feelings

When you release all those pent up emotions, you will immediately feel liberated, lighter, and much better than before. Don’t ever feel ashamed by asking for help – most people love when others come to them for advice or support because it makes them feel needed and important. Everybody needs somebody sometimes, and a breakdown definitely counts as one of those times to lean on those who care about you.

3 – Travel and Put on Relaxing Music

After you have calmed down a bit, get in your car, on your bike, or head out on foot and just travel for a little while. You can put on your favorite music, enjoy a change of scenery, and have some time to yourself. If you have been under a lot of stress lately, getting out of the house can help for a few reasons:

For one, traveling means you have to concentrate on the journey and all of your surroundings, which means it will help get your mind off of whatever you’ve been dealing with. Also, maybe you just want to be alone for a while; maybe dealing with other people just exacerbates the situation. Usually, during a mental breakdown, people need to be left alone for a while to process their feelings and pray, meditate, or just try to relax.

music for peace of mind

Going for a trip to the countryside or maybe to your favorite local park will allow you to recuperate and hopefully resolve any underlying problems. Being surrounded by nature always seems to put things into perspective and mend the soul – coupled with music that sort of zones you out from all the problems in the world, this can act as a powerful natural therapy.

4 – (Bonus) Connect with your creator

Last but not least, one of the absolute most powerful ways to find mindfulness during a meltdown is to connect with the tranquil spirit that resides within you. Take three deep breaths, close your eyes, and simply ask your spirit for its tranquility to assist you through these trying times.  You’ll be surprised at the rapid response and the soothing energy that flows throughout your mind and body.  Never forget that divine assistance always stands at the ready – if you merely ask.

peace of mindFinal Thoughts on Regaining Peace of Mind Post-Meltdown

Anytime you have a mental/emotional/spiritual breakdown, it can feel like the whole world is crashing down around you. Let the waves of feelings wash over you, and remember not to resist them. Ride out the storm and wait for the sun to come out again because darkness doesn’t last forever.

In time, you will regain your peace of mind.

9 Reasons to Nap More Often

Winston Churchill. Margaret Thatcher. Bill Clinton. What do all of published a study these individuals have in common? Yes, they were all heads of state and leaders of their respective countries. They each also indulge in a mid-day snooze. Thatcher told her aides not to bother her between 2:30 and 3:30 pm each day so she could nap, while Clinton did the same at 3 pm.

Napping isn’t just for political dignitaries, however. The benefits of taking a nap are almost practically indisputable. Those who nap report better performance, improved mood, enriched creativity, and a myriad of health benefits. For these reasons, the previous stigma about naps being a form of laziness has long since faded away. (To the best of our knowledge, Presidents and Prime Ministers are not exactly known for laziness).

“You must sleep some time between lunch and dinner, and no halfway measures.” – Winston Churchill

Here are 9 reasons that suggest why you should nap more often:

1. Taking a nap reduces fatigue

According to WebMD, Americans (and many others) are chronically sleep-deprived. Dr. William Anthony, the author of the book The Art of Napping at Work and clinical psychologist/director at Boston University’s Center for Psychological Rehabilitation, states that naps are the result of the numerous demands placed on people.

Anthony cites long work hours, early-morning commutes, and many responsibilities at home as being the main reasons why many people require daytime naps. He goes onto further state that napping is extremely effective for counteracting fatigue.

2. Taking a nap improves mood

A study done at the Department of Behavioral Sciences at Hiroshima University in Japan was undertaken to determine the effects that a short, 20-minute nap has on overall mood.

The study involved seven young adults with normal sleeping habits who did not nap on a regular basis. The youngsters were placed under conditions which involved measured periods of napping and non-napping. An Electroencephalography (EEG) device was used to measure brainwave activity and self-ratings of mood (among other measurements) were taken by the seven adults.

The study found that the short nap resulted in a better overall mood, increased self-confidence, and increased alertness.

3. Taking a nap improves memory

It’s already proven that sleep is vital to storing information learned throughout the day. In addition to regular sleep cycles, researchers wanted to find out how napping can improve overall memory.

Dr. Matthew Walker, professor of psychology and neuroscience at the University of California, Berkeley and his team recruited 44 volunteers – 27 women and 17 men – to conduct a napping experiment. The research team then instructed the group to memorize and match 100 names and faces and tested for how well they performed.

Half of the participants that took a nap for approximately 90 minutes, while the other half remained awake and carried on as usual. At the end of the nap, both groups were given another set of 100 faces and names. The difference in performance was significant – the napping group performed about 20% better than those who stayed awake on the same test.

4. Napping prevents burnout

“Burnout” – irritation, poor performance, and frustration – is a common occurrence among the overworked (pretty much everyone). This happens because the brain overloads with stimuli (information) when doing anything that requires cognitive effort for a period of time. This burnout effect intensifies as the day unfolds.

A study done in the journal Nature Neuroscience had participants perform a visually-oriented task: stating either the vertical or horizontal (up or across, respectively) positioning of three bars on a computer screen. To make the test more cognitively demanding, the graphic bars were set on a background of horizontal bars in the lower left corner of the screen.

In a series of four test periods, the results worsened for each test period. Indeed, the second outcome proved worse than the first period, the third worse than the second, etc. When the researchers granted the participants a 30-minute nap, the scores stopped lowering. A 1-hour nap improved the performance results back to those similar to the beginning period.

The bottom line: consider taking a nap when experiencing burnout to improve performance.

5. Napping improves performance

Study after study continues to demonstrate the powerful effects that napping can have on cognitive performance. This is due to the fact that naps enhance the processing of information.

nap improves performance

A study done at The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) found that pilots who were allowed to take a short nap (40-45 minutes) improved their flight performance by 34% and their alertness by 100%. This improved performance and alertness likely apply to any field of work, whether or not you happen to pilot a space shuttle.

6. Napping heightens creativity

The journal Sleep published a study showing that napping can increase creative thinking. There is one caveat to this study – the nap must be at least 60 to 90 minutes in duration. This is because demanding cognitive processes such as creative thinking require cycling through all five stages of sleep. For this reason, it is best to take this lengthy snooze sometime during the early afternoon or at an hour that will not interfere with your nighttime sleep.

creativity -nap

7. Napping improves heart health

In a 2007 study done at Harvard University’s School of Public Health, it was discovered that regular napping can reduce the rate of death from heart disease by upwards of 37%. This statistic is comparable to the cardiovascular benefits of other activities – healthy dieting, lowering cholesterol intake, and exercise.

heart failure

Here’s what Dr. Dimitrios Trichopoulos, the study’s head researcher said:

“If confirmed by other investigations, these results would imply that a siesta could be added to the several means available for the control of coronary heart mortality…the magnitude of the effect appears to be considerable.”

8. Taking a nap regulates weight

Not getting enough sleep also has negative effects on your waistline. So you won’t shred many calories sleeping. However, you’ll earn other positive benefits.

In a study conducted in 2010 of 35,000 Japanese adults, those who slept five to six hours a day were twice as likely to become overweight than those who slept seven to nine hours. In a similar study at Columbia University, those who got five to seven hours of sleep were 50% more likely to become obese than those who slept seven to nine hours.

taking a nap

Researchers believe that this weight disparity from not getting enough sleep is a direct result of the decrease in the hormone leptin – which makes you feel full – while increasing the hormone ghrelin, which makes you feel hungry.

Provided that napping does not interfere with nighttime sleep, it is a great way to get in the seven to nine hours that is recommended by the National Sleep Foundation (NSF).

9. Taking a nap promotes restoration (all the above)

You might argue that all of the above benefits of napping result from decompression. Your brain continually takes in and analyzes information. This continuous processing of external stimuli has a direct effect on the functioning of your body. The human body counteracts this impact with the mechanism of sleep for the sake of relaxing and restoring your mental and physical capabilities.

Final Thoughts on Taking a Daily Nap

The important takeaway from this article is not to neglect the importance of sleep. Yes, you work hard and don’t have the luxury of much extra time. However, you’ll find that by making time to sleep (napping included) that you can better handle any situation.

5 Ways to Heal From a Broken Heart

No one likes breakups – they involve pain, depression, anger, and the loss of someone you truly loved. It doesn’t matter whether you or your partner initiated the breakup. Regardless, both of you will have to work through your broken heart and give yourselves time to heal.

Generally, the longer your relationship lasted, the more time you will need to move on from it. Furthermore, you might feel completely torn and shattered on the inside.  (Which, if you’re reading this, you just might). Know that you can overcome the pain if you take the following tips into consideration.

“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” – Marilyn Monroe

5 Ways to Heal From a Broken Heart:

1. Take the breakup as an opportunity to love yourself.

If you have dealt with a breakup recently, you might feel in a constant state of turmoil, but it’s actually a blessing in disguise. If things didn’t work out with your previous lover, it presents an opening in your life that you can fill with whatever you choose. You can try things that make your soul truly happy, like taking those sculpting classes you always wanted to, or starting that business you always dreamt of owning.

Breakups might seem painful, but they always happen for one main reason: you and that person learned and experienced all you could from one another, and now you each need to go your separate ways to keep evolving in this lifetime. If you look at it as a new beginning and a chance to keep growing toward your highest self, this will help you heal a lot faster.

2. Focus on the beautiful relationships you do have.

Even though you may have lost a romantic partner, you still have friends and family who love and care about you. You can still spend your time with them and enjoy life without always having a romantic type of relationship; in fact, it might actually feel more freeing for a while to not have to be tied down all the time. You can go spend an entire day with friends or family and not have to worry about what your partner is doing, or if he or she feels lonely with you not around for the day.

beautiful relationship - broken heart

Remind yourself of who has been by your side through the good times, as well as the bad times, and be grateful for your connection with them. This will help you forget about what you lost by focusing on the relationships that you do have.

3. Don’t talk to them for a while after the end of the relationship.

Seeing, talking to, or being around the person you ended a relationship with will stir up a lot of strong emotions, especially in the first few months after the breakup. Your broken heart is a fresh wound. Give yourself some space and time to heal by not contacting him or her until you feel ready, if ever. Maybe both of you have decided to just move on and cut ties completely, which is sometimes best if the relationship ended on bad terms.

relationship

After the initial shock of the ended relationship, you will likely go through a period of grieving and have an intense longing to get back together with them. With your emotions running high, you might forget why you two ended the relationship in the first place. Just make it easy on yourself and your feelings, and make a pact with your highest self to not contact your ex for a while.

4. Be gentle to yourself.

Let’s face it – breakups are one of the hardest things to go through in life. It often leaves us feeling rejected, broken, confused, and abandoned, and we’re left to mend our aching heart alone. Go easy on yourself after the breakup; if you feel like eating a pint of ice cream one night to cope with the pain, allow yourself to do it. If you need to call into work one day because you don’t feel like getting out of bed, call in.

broken heart

Try not to dwell on your emotions, but also give yourself some slack for a while. You shouldn’t let the breakup dictate your entire life. But you also should realize that you can’t get over a breakup in one night. Let yourself deal with the pain in whatever way feels most comfortable to you.

5. Think of all the qualities you now know you do seek in a relationship.

It’s much easier to get over a relationship when you see all the things you didn’t particularly like about them, then see the lesson of clarity to find what you DO want. It might seem harsh, but it will help you remember why it wouldn’t have worked out long-term with the person anyway. And, you will better remember why you deserve better. Maybe that person didn’t have clear goals for their life, and you wish they did. Maybe they lost their temper easily, and you wished they had been more even-keeled. You can’t change a person. However, you can decide exactly what you want in a partner. Then, only pursue relationships with people who possess those qualities.

broken heart

Of course, no one will be perfect, but you are probably drawn to certain characteristics more than others. Any time you feel down about the breakup, remind yourself why your ex didn’t quite measure up in terms of what you wanted. This will help you stay focused on attracting someone better for you in the future. After you’ve healed your broken heart.

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