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8 Ways to Handle Highly Stressful Situations

Truly, there is only one guarantee in this lifetime, and that is there are no guarantees. From the time that you wake up to the time your bed hits the pillow at night, any number of difficult and stressful situations can occur. At the risk of sounding cliché, it is how you respond to these situations that might make all the difference.

“Sometimes when people are under stress, they hate to think, and it’s the time when they most need to think.” – William J. Clinton, 42nd President of the United States

It can be difficult to remember the importance of our response when the drastic happens; you’re laid off, the car breaks down, money is tight (sometimes really tight), your job is stressful…any number of these things can happen to any of us. Let us remember to respond quickly and rationally if we should encounter any of these situations.

Here are 8 ways to handle any highly stressful situation…

1. Remember that nothing (and no one) can “make” you feel anything.

Your reaction to the situation is just that…your reaction. How you feel about and ultimately deal with a situation is your choice. There is no way to control the actions of others, but you can control how you respond.

One important aspect of this is to understand when a situation is uncontrollable, such as a bad economy, sickness, or something else. When the uncontrollable happens, we must accept it as is. There is a big difference, however, between accepting the situation and giving up. Acceptance is important, but so is coping effectively. In choosing to be effective in how we react, we significantly reduce stress. Remember this and utilize some of the pointers that follow.

2. Replace a poor attitude with gratitude.

The attitude that we have towards stressful situations has a definitive effect – positive or negative. A negative attitude is often the automatic, default mechanism that can have an adverse effect on our mental, physical and even spiritual wellbeing.

Instead, consciously attempt to replace this negative, default reaction with gratitude. For example, when you find yourself backed up in traffic, change your perspective. Think about things to be appreciative of. You might find family, friends, work, health, faith, or something else.

Look around for things in nature to admire and appreciate – trees, sunshine, or a pleasant view. When you make a conscious attempt to place gratitude ahead of negativity, you’ll find your attitude changing.

3. Relax, then relax some more.

In the midst of a busy, hectic, stressful day, it is very easy to forget about taking care of your emotional and physical wellbeing. When your boss is acting like a dictator or you are late on a project, it’s very tempting to allow this negativity to take over your day.

Instead, try to use the extra downtime at work to relax and rejuvenate. When you have a break, take a few minutes to step away from everything and let go. Do some breathing exercises, read, or send a quick text to a loved one. Spend your lunch hour doing something enjoyable and forget about the negative that happened before. Remember, relaxation doesn’t require a significant amount of time. It’s what you do with this time that ultimately makes the big difference in your mindset.

4. See the big picture.

When you are running late, forget something, or something else unexpected happens, it is likely to be of little consequence. However, your “fight or flight” response hardwired into your brain will release stress hormones that make this event seem much more significant than it actually is.

Remember to evaluate the stressful situation from an overall, rational perspective. Ask yourself “Will this situation really matter in the long-term?” or “How important is this to my life? Is it really more important than my mental and physical wellbeing?” Most times, the answer will be no. If this is the case, simply move on and adjust accordingly. It’s not worth your time and energy.

5. Learn some “stress stoppers.”

As mentioned, encountering stressful situations has a big effect on your mind and body. The American Heart Association recommends these “stress stoppers” for different situations.

– Count to 10 before you speak.

– Take three to five deep breaths.

– Walk away from the stressful situation, and handle it later.

– Go for a walk.

– Don’t be afraid to say “I’m sorry” if you made a mistake.

– Set your watch five to 10 minutes ahead to avoid the stress of being late.

– Break down big problems into smaller parts. For example, answer one letter or phone call per day, instead of dealing with everything at one time.

– Drive in the slow lane or avoid busy roads to help you stay calm while driving.

– Smell a rose, hug a loved one or smile at your neighbor.

– Consider meditation or prayer to break a negative cycle.

6. Positive self-talk

We all talk to ourselves throughout the day. Most of this talk is internal and will vary in accordance with the situation encountered. The default reaction when we encounter a difficult situation, task, or event sometimes leads to negative self-talk. This negative self-talk only serves to increase stress and makes the resolution of the problem more difficult.

Instead, practice using positive self-talk to calm down and control stress. Here are some examples:

“I can’t do this…” becomes “I’ll do the best I can.”

“I hate it when this happens…” becomes “I can easily handle this; I just need to think…”

“Nothing is going right today…” becomes “I’ll just take it step-by-step…”

The important thing to remember is to practice this transition. You can likely expect some internal resistance to a change in mindset, but you will see a positive change if you persevere.

7. Take one step at a time

When I was in graduate school studying for my Master’s degree, I was often overwhelmed by the sheer amount of work to be done. When one research paper was complete, there was another one right around the corner. Then an exam…then a group project…and so on. But the focus was not on the next paper or exam; it was on finishing and just being done with it all.

It was a tremendously stressful time, and an advisor offered some advice: “Remember this corny adage: ‘How does a marathon runner finish a race? One mile at a time.’”

Marathon runners are in tremendous shape, practice year-round, and have tremendous self-discipline. Even so, a marathon runner can experience excruciating pains and difficulties in finishing a 26-mile race.

Sometimes we need a small shift in mindset. Too often, when faced with a difficult task we jump to the finish instead of facing one obstacle at a time. It’s much easier to narrow our focus, complete one task, and then tackle the next one.

8. Ask for help

With all of the tips, hints, and advice about dealing with stressful situations, this one may be the most important. Depending on the scale and longevity of the stress encountered, it may become necessary to ask for help.

It is important to understand that there is no shame in asking for help. Please don’t allow pride, discouragement, or stubbornness to dissuade you from seeking assistance, of whatever kind, when it’s needed. There are people who love and care for you unconditionally. And, they are there for you no matter the situation.

Your friends and loved ones don’t care what the problem is or its magnitude; all they care about is helping you to see it through. Sometimes, we need to allow the good people in our life show how much they care for us.

stressful situations

How Do YOU Handle the Stress of Daily Life?

Join the discussion:  How do you handle highly stressful situations?  Add your favorite tips and advice in the comments below! And, if you haven’t already, please join us on Facebook!

15 Proven Reasons to Meditate More Often

In recent years, a growing number of studies have been done to analyze the effects of meditation on the mind and body. Those who meditate receive numerous benefits.

Those benefits include reduced anxiety and stress, a clear mind, a more positive outlook. In some cases, it could even cure depression.

Asian cultures have practiced meditation for thousands of years, and ancient civilizations dating back to as early as 1st century BC documented their successes with meditation as well.

Meditation is quickly spreading into the western world as Americans realize the many benefits of this peaceful practice that have been forgotten for centuries. If you don’t already maintain a regular meditation practice, here are some reasons why you should include it in your daily regimen more often.

15 Reasons to Meditate More Often

1. It quiets the mind

Throughout the day, our minds become filled with a lot of chatter and excess information, so meditation helps to clear your mind and ease the incessant thought patterns that might go through your mind. Meditation actually makes you wiser by enabling you to observe your thoughts and eliminate those that no longer serve you. It teaches you that you don’t have to become a slave to your mind, and how to master it instead.

2. It changes your brain chemistry

Neuroscience research has shown that meditation and mindfulness training can alter the neuroplasticity of your brain. A group of Harvard neuroscientists studying mindfulness meditation have reported that just eight weeks of meditation can result in structural brain chemistry changes. What does all that really mean? It means that just by quieting your mind for fifteen to thirty minutes a day, you can create positive changes in the makeup of your cells, which control every function in your body.

3. It can relieve anxiety and depression

As mentioned before, meditation can alleviate mood disorders, according to 47 separate studies analyzed in JAMA Internal Medicine. In a study done by researchers at Wake Forest Baptist Medical Center, brain imaging of the participants in the study found that meditation-related anxiety relief was associated with activation of the anterior cingulate cortex, ventromedial prefrontal cortex, and anterior insula. These areas of the brain are involved with executive function and the control of worrying. Meditation-related activation of these three regions was directly linked to anxiety relief.

4. It increases your self-awareness

The whole idea behind meditation is to observe yourself without judgment. Most people feel disconnected in life because they actually don’t have any sort of relationship with themselves. Meditation allows you to develop a healthy relationship with yourself and explore your deepest thoughts and feelings. It helps you become aware of negative thoughts and teaches you to transmute them into either neutral or positive feelings.

5. It helps you stay focused

Oftentimes, people have a hard time focusing on the task at hand because their mind wanders in a million directions at once. Meditation can help with that over time by teaching the brain to slow down and fully immerse itself in the task at hand.

6. It teaches you self-love.

Believe it or not, your brain can become your own worst enemy. Meditation teaches you to become aware of your self-talk and take on the role of the silent observer behind the thoughts. Meditation practice allows you to increase your awareness of your thoughts without becoming attached to them. In this way, it helps you love yourself more when you can observe yourself without any judgment.

7. Meditation develops your self-confidence

This goes along with teaching you self-love because confidence arises from actually knowing yourself. How can you feel confident about someone you don’t really even know? By getting to know yourself, you can accept who you are in your entirety, from your flaws to your greatest assets. When you truly love yourself, your self-esteem will increase because you no longer feel detached from your true essence.

8. It makes you feel more connected

Meditation can increase your interconnectedness to everything and everyone around you, not just yourself. The more time you spend alone, ironically, the more you will feel connected to the whole Universe. Recent studies have shown that by practicing what’s called “compassion meditation,” you can increase the area in your brain responsible for processing love and compassion.

9. It makes you feel happier

Who doesn’t want to feel happier these days? Start to meditate! Feeling better about yourself and about life couldn’t be any easier. All it takes is a commitment to the practice and the willingness to be open with yourself and flesh out all the bottled up emotions you may have.

10. It can help your memory

Meditation develops mental focus—a skill that may serve quite useful for other activities requiring prolonged attention. In a study in the journal Mindfulness, college psychology students who briefly meditated right before a lecture scored better on a post-lecture quiz than students who didn’t meditate.

11. It could lower your blood pressure

One of the biggest benefits meditation offers is the balancing of the nervous system, which helps regulate your blood pressure. A 1974 study conducted at Harvard Medical School (and since repeated in other studies) reported that borderline hypertension could be treated with meditation. By adopting the practice, most people under the age of 40 could expect to fall below the limit set for borderline hypertension, which is 130.90.

12. It can boost your immune system

Meditation also keeps illnesses and infections at bay. In one study testing immune function, flu shots were administered to volunteers who had meditated for eight weeks and to another group of people who didn’t meditate. Blood samples taken later revealed the meditation group had higher levels of antibodies produced against the flu virus, according to the study in Psychosomatic Medicine.

13. Meditation can ease PMS symptoms and increase fertility

PMS symptoms and infertility problems can be improved with regular meditation. In one study, PMS symptoms lessened by 58% when women meditated regularly. Another study found that hot flashes were less intense among women who meditated.

Women struggling with infertility showed much less anxiety, depression, and fatigue following a 10-week meditation program (along with exercise and nutrition changes); 34% became pregnant within six months.

14. It could increase your productivity

Most people who meditate find that they can focus better and get more done in a shorter amount of time. If you have been feeling frazzled lately, try meditating at least fifteen minutes a day. If you have a clear mind, you can more easily sort through tasks and get them finished quicker.

15. It makes you more optimistic

In general, if you feel disconnected and stressed, you probably can’t enjoy life to the fullest. When you meditate, you can eliminate all those barriers keeping you from a positive life and help you understand what you can do to make your life more enjoyable. With self-awareness comes self-responsibility, and by working actively on your life, you will have a better outlook and feel more positive about yourself and the future.

meditation rocks

How Do YOU Meditate?

We’d love to hear your meditation routine. Join in the discussion:  Do you meditate now? How has it helped you? If not, do you think you will start after reading this?

5 Signs You’re a Truly Humble Spirit

In today’s world, many people view humility as a sign of weakness, but it actually reveals many positive traits about a person. Despite humbleness being associated with a passive mindset or a meek personality, humility actually means that you feel confident enough in yourself that you don’t have to appear overly assertive. Quiet confidence often goes a lot farther than loud insecurities, and humble people prove that every single day in their jobs, school, or home life.

While humility is rare to find today, here are some common signs that you exemplify a truly humble spirit.

5 Signs You’re a Truly Humble Spirit

1. You Don’t Feel the Need to Boast

Humble people don’t need to brag about their accomplishments or beg others for attention; they already feel confident enough in themselves and don’t wish to always have the spotlight on them.

If you can walk through life feeling assured of your own path and your achievements without needing others to approve or acknowledge you, that’s a major sign that you have a humble disposition.

2. You Put Others Before Yourself

If you constantly worry about others and want to make a difference in their lives, you are probably a pretty humble person. Wanting to serve others is a common trait of humble people. If you volunteer for a local charity, work with the disabled or disadvantaged, or dedicate your life’s work to positively impacting others somehow, you should consider yourself a humble spirit.

3. You Enjoy Making Others Happy

If you put other people before yourself, chances are that you enjoy putting a smile on their faces. Self-absorbed people tend to only think about what benefits them, whereas humbled people look beyond themselves to what can benefit the entire planet. They enjoy contributing to the greater good. Furthermore, they believe that their purpose lies in contributing to others’ lives in a positive way.

If you truly love to lift others up and see their lives get progressively better, it’s safe to say that you are a humble person.

4. You Don’t Believe Life Owes You Anything

In reality, life doesn’t owe us anything; we actually owe something to life. However, most people feel entitled to more money, power, clothing, or other things in life, without stopping to think what they can bring to the table.

Humble people don’t subscribe to a victim mentality – they work the best they can with what they have, and remain thankful for everything they have been given. They find happiness with what they already have. Additionally, they view anything else they may get in life as a bonus. Humble people focus on what they can give, not what they can get.

5. You See Everyone as Equal

Humble people don’t see themselves as better or worse than anyone else. In fact, they aren’t even concerned with how they measure up to others; they’re too busy focusing on becoming their best selves to feel jealous of someone else’s status.

And, even if they do pay attention to what others are doing, they don’t feel threatened or worried about their actions. They encourage others and act as a team player. Humble people don’t feel the need to compare themselves to other people – they feel confident in their own path and realize that everyone on Earth must follow their own hearts.

They know that everyone, including themselves, has the potential to be great, because greatness is a choice at the moment. If you feel that you are on the same level as both a janitor and a CEO at the same time, you are likely a very humble person.

Final Thoughts on Living a Life of Humility

Some of the greatest minds in history lived humbly. Think Gandhi, Mother Teresa, Dr. George Washington Carver, the Dalai Lama. If you choose to adopt this mindset, you will be in good company.

We’d love to hear your take on this matter. Hop over to Facebook and join us.

25 Gifts You Can Give Every Day of The Year

“Each day provides its own gifts.” – Marcus Aurelius

Many people observe the holidays and recognize them as days to give gifts and spread good cheer.  While that is all well and good, it makes us question the days we do not observe as holidays.  Gifts aren’t as often shared to spread joy and happiness, mainly because we think “well, we would all be broke!” – but that is hardly the case.

The truth is, there are gifts that you can give EVERY day of the year (and you don’t even need to wrap them!).   To top it all off, these gifts will even make you, and the people around you, richer than ever before.

Furthermore, gifts don’t need to cost you a single dime! The best things you can give to your loved ones come from your heart. And, they are appropriate to offer up to friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors.

Here are 25 gifts you can give to anyone, every day of the year.

1. Give thanks

2. Give a hug

3. Give the person behind you in line the gift of a free lunch/coffee

4. Give a compliment

5. Give compassion

6. Give your time

7. Give your encouragement

8. Give your support

9. Give love

10. Give patience

11. Give your effort

12. Give positive energy

13. Give hope

14. Give a chance

15. FOR-give

16. Give a smile

17. Give a helping hand

18. Give a massage

19. Give someone confidence

20. Give advice (positive, of course 😉 )

21. Give happiness

22. Give education

23. Give an affirmation

24. Give a valuable lesson

25. Give the warmth of your heart

Offer These Heartfelt Gestures to Those You Love

So during your days, whether they’re “holi” or not, be sure to remember that giving is possible all year long. That is important to remember. And that’s because the gifts that are worth the most to give and receive hardly cost you anything at all.

Join the discussion:  What gifts do you like to share with the world all year long?  Share in the discussion below! Or, share some thoughts with us over on Facebook!

11 Life Changing Lessons to Learn from Einstein

When most people think of Einstein, they think of the theory of relativity and “the world’s most famous equation,” E=MC². However, we can learn a lot more from Einstein than just scientific formulas and theories.

Albert Einstein also offered renowned knowledge of becoming your best self and enjoying life to the fullest.

Even if you have no interest in science, you can still apply these valuable lessons today.

11 Life-Changing Lessons to Learn from Einstein

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1. Value Your Imagination

“The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination.” -Einstein

“Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.” -Einstein

“Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand.” -Einstein

Imagination is the highest form of research.” –Einstein

2. Never Stop Being Curious

“I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious.”

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.”

“The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science.” -Einstein

3. Be Willing to Learn New Things

“Learning is experience. Everything else is just information.” – Einstein

“Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.”

“Intellectual growth should commence at birth and cease only at death.” -Einstein

4. Realize that Growth Comes Out of Failure

A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new. – Albert Einstein

“The only sure way to avoid making mistakes is to have no new ideas.” – Albert Einstein

“You never fail until you stop trying.”

Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them. – Albert Einstein

“Only the one who does not question is safe from making a mistake.” —Albert Einstein

5. Dare to be Different and Take Initiative

“Only those who attempt the absurd can achieve the impossible.” – Albert Einstein

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” – Albert Einstein

The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the evil people, but because of the people who don’t do anything about it.

“I never made one of my discoveries through the process of rational thinking.” – Albert Einstein

6. Live in the Moment and Realize that Beauty Exists Everywhere

“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.” – Albert Einstein

“I never worry about the future. It comes soon enough.”

“He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed.” – Albert Einstein

“There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle.”

“A happy man is too satisfied with the present to dwell too much on the future.” Albert Einstein

7. Live Selflessly and Value Others

“Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.”

“Try to become not a man of success, but try rather to become a man of value.”

“Only one who devotes himself to a cause with his whole strength and soul can be a true master. For this reason, mastery demands all of a person.”

“We know from daily life that we exist for other people first of all, for whose smiles and well-being our own happiness depends.”

“Enjoying the joys of others and suffering with them—these are the best guides for man.” – Albert Einstein

8. Your Thoughts Create Your Reality

“I admit that thoughts influence the body.”

“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.” – Albert Einstein

9. Unleash Your Greatness

“Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.”

einstein quote

10. Be Kind to All Living Beings On Earth

“Our task must be to free ourselves by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty.” – Albert Einstein

11. Trust Your Inner Voice

“The only real valuable thing is intuition.”

“Never do anything against conscience even if the state demands it.”

“Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.”

5 Reasons to Cuddle More Every Day

Most people love to cuddle because it feels good, helps them relax, and can even increase their outlook on life. It’s hard to find any reason NOT to cuddle with someone every day because cuddling offers so many benefits.

However, you don’t have to be in a relationship to experience the positive effects of cuddling. In fact, even hugging friends and family or showing love to your pet releases oxytocin. That’s the hormone that scientists call the “feel-good hormone.”

So, what else can a cuddle do for you?

1 – It helps boost your immune system

Cuddling, or even hugging, someone at least four times a day is necessary for survival, according to psychotherapist Virginia Satir. Interestingly, science clearly connects better health with more cuddling in many different studies. The human touch has the power to drop a person’s levels of cortisol, a hormone released as a result of stress. As Roberta Lee of Beth Israel Medical Center in New York explains, “Cortisol suppresses the immune response. Anything that increases the relaxation response triggers the restoration of your immune response.”

In turn, cuddling can increase the effectiveness of your immune system while making you feel happier and loved. If that’s not enough reason to cuddle, here are some more reasons to consider.

2 – It can alleviate social anxiety.

Cuddling is just another way to exchange energy, whether that be between two humans or a human and another animal. When people cuddle, it releases oxytocin. That chemical is a powerful chemical in the brain known for its ability to relieve anxieties of all kinds. Because it helps break down social barriers, oxytocin is viewed as an incredible natural remedy to overcome social inhibitions. Studies have shown that oxytocin could be effective in treating debilitating shyness or to help people with social anxieties and mood disorders.

If you have been suffering from social anxiety for quite some time, cuddling could indeed ease your symptoms and help change your mindset about social situations.

3 – It relieves pain.

Again, a major contributor to why cuddling feels so good is oxytocin. If you have a headache or joint pain, cuddling can help alleviate your pain and even increase your pain tolerance. A small study with nine patients revealed that seven out of nine of them who took doses of oxytocin reported less chronic pain and improvement in the intensity of pain flare-ups over time.

You don’t even need pills to experience pain relief – you can just go right to the source and cuddle with your significant other or even your pet to get the same result!

4 – It makes you happier.

Cuddling with someone helps you feel bonded with them, which promotes feelings of safety and contentment. According to Women’s Health Magazine, “touching someone releases [dopamine and serotonin], both of which can boost your mood and curb depression.”

According to Paul Zak, a well-known expert on the oxytocin hormone and self-proclaimed “Dr. Love,” oxytocin is the “moral molecule behind all human virtue, trust, affection and love, a ‘social glue’ that keeps society together.”

Any sort of physical touch can release this hormone, which means cuddling can greatly improve your mood and promote lasting feelings of happiness!

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5 – A good cuddle helps to get rid of stress.

As aforementioned, your body releases cortisol into your system when you have high levels of stress. Cuddling immediately lowers your stress levels because of the famous love hormone, oxytocin, being released automatically into your body. High levels of stress promote numerous unhealthy reactions, from weight gain to high blood pressure, headaches, heart disease, and other serious problems.

If you feel stressed, skip the medications and head for a relaxing place in your home where you can enjoy some cuddle time with your loved ones.

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