9 Reasons to Stop Seeking Approval From Others

December 5, 2014 by Power of Positivity

When you seek approval from others, you add an unnecessary step to the decision-making process. You invite scrutiny from people who really can’t comment on your life because they haven’t lived it. You essentially give up your power to another person.

Why should others get to determine your life plans?

Why Do Some People Seek Approval From Others?

Humans are inherently social creatures. Evolutionarily, our survival and success depend on our ability to function well within a group. If you were accepted and valued by the group, you had a better chance of survival and sharing resources. If you were ostracized or rejected, survival became significantly more challenging.

This evolutionary heritage has made the need for social acceptance and approval deeply ingrained in our psychology. Several psychological factors come into play:

Self-worth and Self-esteem: How others see us often influences our perception of our self-worth. When people receive positive feedback or approval, it reinforces a positive self-image. Conversely, negative feedback can lower self-esteem.
Social Comparison Theory posits that people evaluate their abilities and opinions by comparing themselves to others. Gaining approval often means one is doing “better” in comparison, which can be a source of happiness and satisfaction.
Belongingness Hypothesis: This is rooted in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. The theory suggests that the need for belonging is a fundamental human motivation. People have a basic need to feel closely connected to others, and seeking approval is one way to strengthen these connections.
Validation of Beliefs: When others approve of our actions or beliefs, it reinforces the notion that we are on the right path. This validation reduces uncertainty and cognitive dissonance.
Conditioning: From childhood, many people are conditioned to seek approval. Positive reinforcement (like getting a gold star in school or praise from parents) can make individuals repeat behaviors that garner approval.
Fear of Rejection: At the same time, negative consequences from a lack of approval or outright disapproval can lead to a fear of rejection. This fear can drive people to seek approval to avoid these negative feelings continually.

In essence, seeking approval from others can be tied back to our evolutionary roots, fundamental psychological needs, and societal conditioning. While seeking external validation can provide short-term boosts to our happiness, long-term contentment often requires a balance between seeking external approval and cultivating intrinsic self-worth.

9 Things to Remember if You Seek the Approval of Others

Remember the following facts the next time you seek approval to refocus on why it isn’t necessary.

You are the One in Control of Your Life

Next time you have the urge to get permission from someone to follow through with a plan, remind yourself that you are the one in control. You can seek all the guidance you need from within by listening to your heart and following your passions. Others are often unsure about their life path, much less yours. Ultimately, you have all the power you need to take charge of your life. You are the driver of your soul; you know where to turn and what roads to take already. Trust in yourself and the Universe to guide you along your unique path.

You are in Charge of Your Own Happiness

Others can add to your happiness, but you shouldn’t depend on others’ opinions on it. Seeking happiness in others often results in disappointment because others may disagree with your plans. They may dismiss them and not understand what you truly want or believe in your dreams.

You empower yourself when you look to yourself as your beacon of hope, light, and happiness. You stop letting things or people outside yourself control your destiny and remember that happiness comes from within. Others can let you down, but you can never let yourself down if you remain true to your innermost desires in life.

Seeking Approval from Others is Time-Consuming

Think of how many other things you could be doing besides arguing with people about your plans and trying to get them to see through your eyes? To be honest, some people may never understand you or even try to see things your way. Asking others for approval adds a superfluous step to making a decision.

Instead of relying on others to support you, support yourself. If you have a burning desire to travel the world, go. You can tell others of your plans, but leave it at that. You don’t need their approval if you support your decision already. Time is precious, so use it to make your heart happy instead of convincing others to agree with every decision you make.

Freedom Comes When you Depend Solely on Yourself

Imagine how it would feel to make a big decision about your life all by yourself. Believe it or not, you have the strength to carry out your plan without others’ permission.

Next time you feel inclined to receive counsel from family/friends about your next big move, try to set your plan into action first. Don’t feel like you have to inform everyone when you make decisions; you can save a lot of headaches and gain freedom when initiating change by yourself. You are the creator and master of your life – never forget that. You have the power to transform your life all by yourself; all you have to do is believe it. True freedom awaits us when we rise to our potential and let go of our need to please everyone, which brings us to the next point…

You Can’t Please Everyone, So Don’t Even Try

Not everyone will agree with you all the time. Maybe no one will agree with your plan besides you, and that’s okay. Being a people-pleaser usually makes everyone happy except you; you’re the most essential part of the equation.

Everything stems from you – the quality of your relationships, your thoughts about life, what career you choose, etc. If you make major life decisions with everyone but you in mind, you will never find true happiness.

For example, if you took a high-paying job as a Marketing Director at a huge company just because your parents wanted you to, but you absolutely hated it, what good does this do for you? If you can’t come home at the end of the day and say you’re happy, nothing else matters. None of it is the money, your parent’s approval, your title or your status. Do what makes you happy. Others can either choose to encourage you or rain on your parade. Remember that others’ unhappiness with your life is not your responsibility to fix; everyone is in charge of their own.

You Get to Know Yourself Better

There is no relationship more important than the relationship you have with yourself. Looking to your inner self for guidance and wisdom will help you better understand who you are and what you want out of life. Take some time to tune in. So block out everyone else’s voices attempting to control your life and listen to your inner guide. By breaking the habit of approval-seeking, you can focus on figuring yourself out and learn to trust in your path rather than putting that responsibility on others.

You Drain Yourself of Valuable Energy

Not only does approval-seeking waste time, but it wastes energy as well. Energy makes up everything in this vast Universe, including you. If you want to use that energy most efficiently, cut out unnecessary actions. If you want to keep the fire alive and genuinely transform your life, you must dismiss the need to gain outside approval for your decisions.

Asking for Approval Could Discourage you From Following Your Heart

Let’s pretend that you want to drop out of college and travel the world on a quest to find yourself. Do you first worry about how you think others will react? If this truly resonates with you, you will never know unless you try, and you will forever wonder where life would’ve gone had you only listened to that inner calling.

Don’t let others kill your dreams before they become a reality. Confess your desires yourself and trust that your inner voice directs you to the right path.

Seeking Approval From Others Promotes Fear

When you seek approval from others, you begin to form expectations of what they will say. You start thinking about how the conversation will go if they don’t agree with you, and you become anxious about their response. Fear only holds you back, but love will set you free. If you genuinely love yourself and feel assured in your life, you won’t even think twice about giving up the need for acceptance. We have been conditioned to fear many things – other people, their opinions of us, trying new things, listening to new ideas, and much more.

Final Thoughts on the Human Desire to Ask for Approval

Remember that fear is just an illusion. Give into who you indeed are, which is abundant and unconditional Love, and you will realize the limitless power within that greatly surpasses the power of others’ opinions.

21 Small Ways to Love Big In Your Relationships

December 3, 2014 by Kristen Butler

“You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.” – Sam Keen

The effects of giving and receiving love in a relationship can throw us some pretty big challenges in life. So colossal sometimes, that they can rarely be solved all at once. No matter how big the challenge may be. However, the best way to succeed is through a series of small, measurable steps.

First and foremost, it’s important to remember that love always needs to be nurtured. It develops deeper and deeper as it is fostered by small, loving steps. Authentic, lasting relationships are rarely created overnight. Love takes time.

Creating a successful relationship is a lot like building a home. First, you inspect and familiarize yourself with the land and decide if it’s the right place to build. When you’ve found the perfect spot, it’s time to begin building a strong and sturdy foundation. Each brick, slab of wood, wall, window, and ceiling are carefully placed with long term intention. Even after the home is built, there is specific care and maintenance that needs to be done for proper upkeep of the home. Without it, the interior and exterior start to break down.

That’s why the real secret to great love can be found in the loving small steps of your daily routine. In fact, many of them are free, it just take conscious effort. Try a few of these regularly to see a boost in your relationships and love life.

21 Small Ways to Love big:

1. Give more hugs!

Studies show hugs release oxytocin that reduces stress, relieves pain, eases anxiety and boosts your immune system. This is a simple, free action we can take every day to bring more love and wellness to our partner.

2. Give your partner more of your full attention, especially if they ask for it.

3. Complain less and compliment more.

4. Admit your mistakes.

5. Give a genuine “Thank You” more often.

Let daily gratitude for your partner flow naturally. Gratitude now creates more to be thankful for later. Which will naturally create a more loving relationship.

6. Be open minded about his/her ideas.

7. Focus on their needs first.

8. Say “I Love You” a few times a day.

9. Laugh together.

10. Make their favorite meal.

11. Allow them to have their own space when they need it.

12. Send a random, love-filled text message or Facebook message.

13. Cuddle and/or have sex more.

Just like hugging, studies have found cuddling to create the same effect on the body. Studies also find that couples who have sex more often

14. Be honest.

15. Plan occasional weekend getaways. Plan them together unless your partner loves spontaneity, then randomly surprise them.

16. Be their biggest fan! Encourage them to do well and keep them going in the areas they want to see the most success. We can all benefit from outside support. Successful people always have huge support that has helped them along the way.

17. Hold hands any chance you get.

18. Listen and be more conscious.

Pay attention to those little annoyances your partner asks you to be mindful of like putting the toilet seat down, picking up your clothes, putting dishes away, keeping your word, etc. Fine-tuning some of the daily little habits that can spark a big argument can really make a big difference.

19. Do a household chore that your partner usually does (pick one they don’t like for extra points).

20. Plan a random, romantic date.

21. Get them a small, thoughtful gift.

It could even be something they were saying they wish they had or needed to pick up (but haven’t yet).

BONUS: Be Generous. A study found that generosity between couples is a key element to their happiness.

Join the Conversation:
Do something that isn’t on the list? We’d like to hear about it . . .

What small thing do you and your partner do for each other regularly that has enhanced your relationship?

7 Ways to Turn Your Living Space into a Thriving Space

December 2, 2014 by Power of Positivity

Unless you are an interior decorator or just have a knack for aesthetics, your living space is probably like most others: a TV, some wall décor, a table, maybe even a nice china cabinet. But does your living space contain anything unique that makes it special to you? Specifically, is there anything within your living space that truly resonates with your inner being? This resonance can be one of peace, strength, spirituality… anything that makes your living quarters an extension of you, or what you wish to be.

“We live as ripples of energy in the vast ocean of energy.” – Deepak Chopra

Here are 7 ideas on how you can create a living space that thrives…

1. Feng Shui

Feng means “wind” and Shui means “water,” which makes sense given that both words are associated with good health in Chinese culture. Thus, Feng Shui is based on Taoist doctrine that environments are alive and filled with qi (pronounced “chee”), or energy. Feng Shui aims to balance the energies within the environment, assuring good health and fortune for the inhabitants.

Advanced Feng Shui techniques are beyond the scope of this article, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take some easy first steps to start the process. Here are a few first steps:

– Clear out clutter. Essentially, you are getting rid of everything in your house that you are not fond of.

– Have high quality air and light. Have as much natural light in the home as possible, open windows, and use spectrum lighting.

– Understand the 5 Feng Shui elements. This includes understanding the Bagua, or the energy map of your home, and the utilization of the earth, fire, metal, water, and wood elements to create the desired outcome.

2. Native American “Smudging”

Smudging is an old Native American tradition, used as a practice to cleanse a place, person or object of negative energies. While certainly a spiritual practice, conventional science does concur that the main herb used in smudging – sage – releases negative ions, which research has linked to a more positive mood.

Essentially, smudging involves burning a dried plant and fanning the smoke over your body and home with a sacred intention – health, prosperity, or any other positive intent – while ordering negative energy and spirits to leave with firmness in your voice.

The basic steps of this practice include:

– Crack open a window or door in your home.

– Take a dried bundle of sage and place it in an abalone or clay shell, then light it with a wooden match.

– Gently blow out the flame while allowing the material to smolder.

– Symbolically wash your hands in the smoke, while taking some over your ears, eyes, heart and head. You may also breathe a little in, if desired.

– While starting at the left side of your front door, walk along the left wall around your entire home; praying, while asking the good spirits to stay and the negative spirits to leave.

– When finished, go outside and put the ashes of the sage at the front doorstep, which is thought to protect the entrance.

3. Have a Sacred space

To have a sacred space in your home, be it an entire room or small cornered area, is to have space where you can be silent, reflect, and get centered. With our lives being so busy, it is easy to forget that silence has the healing power of its own. We each deserve to thrive!

Here are some simple steps to set up a sacred space in your home:

– Define what “sacred” means to you. This can mean religion, spirituality, nature, or something else. Whatever it is, try to define it in a couple of words such as uplifting, calm, prayerful, peaceful or spiritual.

– Dedicate a spot in your home. This can be a room or corner of a room, dresser, table, or somewhere else.

– Create an altar. Try to use items that are meaningful to you and in-line with your definition (using the first step). If you are of a certain faith, you may want a symbol of that faith, such as a crucifix or a small Buddha. The nature of the items is not as important as their relative meaning to you.

– Create a ritual. Once you’ve created your sacred area, figure out when and how you want to utilize it. This is a very personal element to your sacred space, so just find the ritual means to you. Bear in mind that this is optional – you may wish to visit this space whenever the mood strikes.

4. Himalayan rock salt

The ratio of positive to negative ions in the air affects both our breathing and mood. Himalayan rock salt naturally emits negative ions, altering this balance to an optimal state. This balancing of ions allows us to breathe more naturally, have more energy, and maintain a positive state of mind.

This rock salt is most popular in Himalayan Salt Lamps, which has been used in Europe for years due to its multitude of positive health benefits and treatment of disorders such as asthma, allergies, high blood pressure, migraine headaches, and rheumatoid arthritis.

These lamps come in multiple sizes, but it is thought that having small, strategically-placed lamps provides a more effective ion balance than one large lamp. Yoga and reiki practitioners also use the lamps because of their tranquil, pleasant glow.

5. Aromatherapy

Considered a holistic, alternative form of medicine, aromatherapy involves the use of extracted, natural oils for psychological and physical wellbeing. The inhalation of these various oils is thought to stimulate brain function and provide whole-body healing through skin absorption.

Essential oils come in many forms, including jasmine, lavender, patchouli, tea tree, rosemary, and others. Depending on the strength and concentration of the oil, it may be combined with a lotion to dilute its strength and then applied to the skin.

In addition to skin application through lotions and creams, there are other practices as well. Examples include aromatherapy baths, massages, vapor inhalation and compression.

6. Art & Décor

Producing a work of art or skillful décor requires both exceptional talent and a lot of time. The final product is often a beautiful piece that is displayed on walls or can be seen on Custom furnishings, played as a song, or framed as a photograph.

In addition to being beautiful pieces, they also provide an element of transformational ambiance to the space that it occupies. Great art is in such demand because of its ability to heal and inspire, change and evolve.

Our experiences on this Earth are very unique and personal, as is the art that is produced and appreciated by the people who inhabit it. That being said, it is important that you choose the art form that resonates with you; whether in a photograph, painting, drawing, or other. If you find something that inspires you, consider using the piece to enhance your space.

7. Balanced & Energetic Lighting

Numerous studies, such as the one undertaken by the Ohio State University’s Neuroscience Department, have concluded that different shades of lighting affect your mood. One interesting find: people who are less active at night should avoid bluish lighting, such as that given off by TVs and computer screens in order to not disturb their sleep patterns.

Most interior designers already know the unique effects that lighting has. Because of this, they utilize a mix of soft and hard lighting to create the desired atmosphere of the homeowner. However, you don’t need to be an interior designer to learn how to use lighting effectively.

If you desire to create a more restful ambiance in the dining room, for example, consider using soft (shadow-less) lighting effects. In areas where activity occurs, such as the living room or the kid’s playroom, consider using hard (or direct) light to create an atmosphere of liveliness.

For a great article on lighting your home, check out this Better Homes and Gardens article: http://www.bhg.com/decorating/lessons/basics/how-to-light-any-room/

44 Simple Ways to Boost Your Energy

December 1, 2014 by Kristen Butler

Ever feel like you need to boost your energy during the day?

“The higher your energy level, the more efficient your body. The more efficient your body, the better you feel and the more you will use your talent to produce outstanding results.” – Anthony Robbins

In this fast-paced world, most of us have probably experienced drowsiness throughout the day at our jobs or school. Often, we look for ways to wake ourselves up quickly. Unfortunately, many people choose unnatural, unhealthy ways to re-energize, such as caffeinated drinks, energy drinks, or pills. These methods will do their job and make us feel rejuvenated in a heartbeat, but they also take a toll on our health.

When you introduce yourself to healthy, safe methods of boosting energy, you’ll eventually be able to say no to coffee and other unnatural stimulation.

Here are 44 Ways to Boost Your Energy Naturally

1. Get up and walk around every thirty minutes.

Sitting all day at your desk can cause serious long-term problems, so make sure you take some time to walk around the office and take a break from sitting. Even getting up for five minutes at a time can add up at the end of the day if done in 30-minute intervals.

2. Get out in nature.

What wakes you up in the morning? Most people would say their alarm, but sunlight plays a bigger part in getting you out of bed each morning. Nature provides one of the most natural ways to boost your energy, and most people have access to the fresh outdoors, making it a readily available energy booster.

3. Eat fruit.

Fruit contains fructose, a sugar that goes straight to your cells and converts to glucose that powers every cell in your body. Eating more fruit makes you naturally feel more alive from the abundance of carbohydrates. Also, coffee has been proven much more effective at waking people up than caffeine.

4. Increase your magnesium intake.

If you have a magnesium deficiency, your body will need to work harder to accomplish tasks, and your oxygen levels will decrease. To ensure you maintain an optimal magnesium intake, eat nuts, spinach, or beans. If you keep your magnesium levels high, you will feel more vibrant, and your body won’t need to work as hard to get you through each day.

5. Take a nap.

While American culture doesn’t emphasize naps, other countries, such as Spain, take siestas as part of their daily routine. A study found that people who took naps each day had better overall health and increased their efficiency in work. Naps can also rejuvenate you and give you a second wind when you feel tired or unable to concentrate.

6. Never skip breakfast.

Some researchers tout breakfast as the most important meal of the day, giving people the energy to start their day on the right note. Even if you run behind schedule some mornings, try to blend a quick smoothie to drink on your way to work or while you sit at your desk. Eating a breakfast full of fresh, whole fruits will energize you for your entire day and eliminate that mid-day drowsy feeling later on.

7. Exercise at least thirty minutes a day, five days a week.

A sedentary lifestyle can cause serious illnesses and usually makes people feel lethargic and unhappy. Try to participate in moderate to vigorous exercise for at least a half hour each day for five days a week to increase your energy levels and mental and physical health.

8. Stay busy.

When people have idle time, they tend to get bored easily and let their minds wander. This can lead to feeling off-task and without purpose, which gives us more time to think. Overthinking can cloud your mind and make you stressed and exhausted. To combat these feelings, keep your mind busy and focused so you can achieve clarity and perform each day to the best of your ability.

9. Get adequate sleep.

Most people need to drink coffee or energy drinks each morning to stay awake (mostly due to insufficient sleep the night before.) If you want to feel energized each day, make sure you give your mind, body, and soul the rest they deserve and aim for seven to eight hours of sleep each night.

10. Limit your technology use.

Heavy technology use can reduce your natural circadian rhythm and affect melatonin production, which can cause sleeping disorders and even depression. Using less technology can prove challenging today, especially if your job requires you to use a computer, but try to put your phone away at least an hour before bed each night. You will sleep better and therefore have more energy the next day.

11. Meditate.

One of the most effective ways to wake up naturally, meditation provides many other benefits. Meditation can change our DNA and alter our brain chemistry. If you have been feeling tired lately, try to meditate for at least ten minutes each day. You will feel the benefits just minutes after each session, and it provide your mind with some peace and clarity.

12. Drink plenty of water.

Staying hydrated prevents dehydration, which can lead to feelings of fatigue. Our bodies contain over 60% water, which means we need to replenish it often.

13. Avoid artificial energy boosters like caffeine.

Over time, caffeine can affect your sleep schedule, leaving you feeling drained and less-than-stellar. Drinking caffeinated drinks even six hours before bedtime can drastically compromise sleep quality, so avoiding caffeine whenever possible can lead to more energy and better sleep.

Believe it or not, eating an apple has been said to do the trick as a natural energy booster!

14. Splash cold water on your face.

An age-old practice, splashing water on your face can instantly make you feel more alert and refreshed. Try this when you feel sleepy to boost your energy.

15. Get up and stretch.

If you sit at a desk all day, you can easily feel tired simply by staying sedentary for too long. Loosen your muscles and joints by doing quick stretches or yoga poses. Yoga moves the circulatory system and awakens the nervous system, bringing renewed energy to the body.

16. Have something to look forward to.

Oftentimes, people get stuck in a rut when they live a life void of passion. If you want to feel more energetic, make sure your life excites you and provides you with fulfillment.

17. Hug someone.

Hugs just feel good overall. They act as an energy exchange between people and release feelings of happiness and comfort. Hug people often to increase oxytocin, the feel-good chemical known to facilitate bonding and reduce stress. Hugs will make you feel loved and accepted, naturally making you feel more alive.

18. Call up an old friend.

Talking to someone you have known for years allows you to reminisce, laugh, and share stories with that person. Life-long friends usually know us better than anyone, and talking to them after a long lapse can revitalize you and put a smile on your face.

19. Take Vitamin D.

If you live in an area without a lot of sunshine, take a vitamin daily. It will make you feel happier and refreshed, naturally increasing energy levels.

20. Give to the less fortunate.

Feeling low on energy? Practice giving. It will give you a surge of energy because you bring happiness to people’s lives and feel more fulfilled. One of the best ways to renew energy is giving because the positive energy associated with giving comes back to you tenfold.

21. Keep your space organized.

If you have a desk or room filled with clutter, it makes your stress levels rise, which depletes your energy. Devote some time to cleaning up your space to feel calm and stay focused.

22. Eat power snacks.

Eat a handful of nuts or some fresh fruit throughout the day. This will keep your glucose levels steady, which means your energy will remain more level.

23. Write down your goals.

If you have a plan, you will likely feel excited to work toward accomplishing those goals. This will keep you focused and on-task, and completing goals gives a sense of fulfillment. When you reach your full potential, you realize your true power and activate previously dormant energy.

24. Stay thankful.

A surefire way to increase your energy is by giving thanks for everything and everyone in your life. Practice gratitude, and you will naturally have more to be thankful for.

25. Be loving.

If you have ever held onto hatred or extreme dislike toward someone, you likely have noticed a decrease in your energy and overall happiness. By giving love to all beings, you will have a huge store of natural energy and keep a positive attitude, revitalizing you.

26. Choose positivity.

Of course, this list must include positivity; a positive attitude about life keeps lower-frequency thoughts and feelings at bay, which deplete your energy. No matter what situation you encounter, try to remain positive. You will thank yourself later for the burst of energy you feel.

27. Have a close circle of friends.

Having companions to confide in and share all of life’s joyous moments with can make you feel loved and give you a sense of belonging, making you feel more vibrant.

28. Avoid processed foods.

Chemical-laden, altered foods or “food-like” substances lack their potential for true nutrition and are usually higher in calories. Choose natural, organic foods when possible to reap the benefits and energy that foods like fruits and vegetables from the Earth provide.

29. Implement natural lighting.

Artificial LED and fluorescent lights can interfere with our natural sleep cycle and cause more restless than restful nights. Try to turn off artificial lights and open your blinds to let natural light in. Your body responds best to light from the sun because it contains Vitamin D, which is essential for us to function.

30. Give away things you no longer use.

If you want to de-clutter and help those less fortunate, go through all your old things and decide what you need and can give away. In addition to organizing your space, giving away the non-essentials will renew your energy and make you feel good knowing you contributed to a good cause.

31. Take a new road to and from work.

We thrive on new experiences, so taking a new route to work or school will rejuvenate your spirit and make you feel like you are going to a new place.

32. Share a funny story with co-workers.

It never hurts to share some laughs with your work buddies; it will liven up the workplace a bit. If your workday seems dull and your energy drops, mention something funny that happened to you recently. Your co-workers will appreciate it, too.

33. Avoid negative television programs or movies.

Negative messages in TV shows or movies can give you a negative outlook and damage your mood. Try to fill your life with positive images and thoughts, and avoid the heavy programming in most TV shows and movies promoting fear and violence.

34. Keep a journal.

Every night, write down your thoughts about the day or anything. Giving yourself an outlet for your feelings will help you release anything bottled up, allowing more energy for other things in your life.

35. Start a garden or plant flowers.

Another opportunity to get out in nature, growing your own food or planting pretty flowers, will allow you to connect with the Earth and engage in something positive. Most people love to save money, contribute to a cleaner Earth by growing their own food and feel more fulfilled knowing their meals come from their own backyard.

36. Stand on your head.

If you can, look at the world upside-down for a few minutes. The rush of blood to your head will give you more oxygen and make you feel more alive.

37. Consider adding natural herbs to your diet.

Some herbs, known as adaptogens, can increase your endurance and calm anxiety, keeping your energy levels high. Siberian ginseng is one of the most popular and effective herbs for increasing energy.

38. Watch a funny movie.

Most people love a feel-good movie, and there are plenty to choose from. Put on your favorite comedy if you feel a little down about life. It will remind you to take a step back and not take life so seriously, and restore positive feelings.

39. Visit your family.

If you haven’t seen your family in a while, consider visiting them when you can. As the adage goes, “There’s no place like home.” Family can remind you what’s important in life and give you some support, which could be just what the doctor ordered.

40. Put on some upbeat music.

If you can, listen to some up-tempo music. It will stimulate your brain and give you that mid-day boost of energy you were looking for.

41. Avoid energy vampires.

These people constantly complain or find something wrong with any situation. If you want to keep your energy levels high, try to steer clear of these people. They will take your positive energy while leaving you with their negative energy if you aren’t careful.

42. Exercise before work.

Keeping active each day increases vitality and longevity, but exercising before work takes things to the next level. When you make your body sweat before a long day at work or school, you prepare your mind to endure the challenges of the day and are better able to respond to negativity.

43. Simplify your life.

Most people have fairly complicated lives full of more obligations than they can take on. Consider cutting out events or errands that aren’t necessary, and you will free up your time and life for more things you enjoy.

44. Practice positive affirmations.

When you wake up each day, tell yourself something you love about yourself and your life, and remind yourself what a beautiful Universe we live in. Say something like, “I’m amazing and can accomplish whatever I want.” This will empower you to live your best life and give you a quick energy boost before you start your day.

Final Thoughts of Finding Natural Methods to Boost Your Energy

Add to the list! In what ways do you boost your energy naturally? Leave a comment below! 🙂 🙂 🙂

6 Behaviors that Push People Away (And How to Reverse Them)

December 1, 2014 by Power of Positivity

We all manifest one or more behaviors that push people away at least once, if not more. It’s human nature and nothing anyone has to be ashamed about. The mere recognition that you’ve possessed one or more of these traits is a good step towards eliminating them from your life and allowing positivity to enter.

Most of the time, people may not realize they’re pushing others away. There are several reasons for that, and this article will focus on what they are and how to reverse them.

6 Behaviors That Push People Away (and How to Reverse Them)

1. Selfishness

Undoubtedly, the world could use more considerate and thoughtful people. A small gesture of selflessness can go a long way in keeping the people you care about the most in your life. Humans, by nature, are intuitive creatures and can sense if you are doing something with selfish intent. Just because people may not always act on that intuition doesn’t make taking advantage of them okay.

To live a happy life, you must learn how to live and thrive with others, which requires giving away part of yourself without seeking anything in return. Ironically, when you give of yourself without expecting, you are returned that back and more. So if you need a blessing, switch your focus and be a blessing.

2. Conceitedness

The display of conceited behavior will surely push people away in any social situation. Nobody likes story after story of self-edification consistently communicated via an over-inflated ego. Talking about yourself is great when it’s light and authentic. It’s easy to tell the difference.

Despite what mainstream media may portray, there isn’t a single person in the whole world who is the center of everyone’s entire Universe.

It is always a good idea to let other people into the spotlight and consider the implications of your decisions and actions towards them to foster a healthy relationship. Pop any self-inflated bubble you may be living in and try to communicate and understand the needs and happiness of those around you.

3. Self-Righteousness

Sometimes people tend to think highly of themselves and their beliefs… too highly. This can lead to looking down on others and their decisions without even knowing it. In some instances, some people’s egos go so far that they may intentionally want others to feel degraded. But this is a false way to live and gain respect.

To transform this, one must understand that each individual sets a different standard of how they want to live their lives – and that’s okay. We all have unique values, and no one is better than anyone else. Respect that and honor others as you honor yourself.

4. Perfectionism

Humans are not perfect. They are bound to make mistakes, which makes humans special. They are capable of using failures as a learning experience. Expecting perfection from others is unfair when you cannot guarantee everything you do is perfect.

Allow for a little leeway and acknowledge that people will make mistakes. Aiming for perfection is unrealistic, but excellence in all things can provide a life of fulfillment.

5. Chronic Complaining

Happy and successful people do not complain much. Conversely, it seems that chronic complainers always have something negative to say… even when those around them are happy! The bottom line: we all have different circumstances that we are given in this lifetime, but in the end, these circumstances are ours – fair or unfair, wanted or unwanted. Instead, seek solutions to problems instead of complaining, leading nowhere.

6. Cynicism

One of the most burdensome behaviors that people tend to display is cynicism. There is no way of finding out the outcome of anything without giving it a chance first. Remember to give people the benefit of the doubt without jumping to conclusions. Positive thinking can bring new ways of thinking and living to any cynic. It may even completely transform their life, because they will be created when you believe in more possibilities.

“Behavior is the mirror in which everyone shows their image.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

9 Comebacks for Dealing with Rude People

November 30, 2014 by Power of Positivity

How do you respond to rude people?

People can tend to have a love – hate relationship with their families, bosses, friends, and even spouses. They can be the sweetest people with loving intentions one second, and the next, say something so rude and offensive that makes you want to call them every name under the sun and react negatively.

Questions like “When did you gain so much weight?” or “When will you ever get another boyfriend?” or “Why haven’t you found a job yet?” can really hit below the belt and set off your temper, if you allow it. People don’t often think about what they say before they say it, which can lead to disaster if the person they are speaking to (you) becomes offended.

You have a right to defend yourself and speak your mind, but you can come up with a retort that allows you to express yourself while still being cheerful and polite.

Finding the proper comeback to deal with rude people isn’t always easy, especially if that person signs your paychecks. If you have been wondering how to handle your mother-in-law, who can’t seem to keep her mouth shut about your weight, or your boss, who shows no remorse when he gives you extra work to do, consider these comebacks the next time you encounter rudeness.

“When someone is rude, keep a smile on your face. When you stay on the high road and keep your joy, you take away their power.” – Joel Osteen

9 Comebacks for Dealing with Rude People

1. Thank you.

A simple “thank you” speaks volumes when you encounter rudeness. Not only does it show the other person that you didn’t let their words affect you, but it also reflects maturity on your part. You chose not to ignore the person or get angry but met both tactics somewhere in the middle. A “thank you” usually implies that you acknowledge someone’s thoughtfulness and respond to that. However, in this case, your “thank you” will mean that you acknowledge the person’s rudeness and choose not to let it affect you. That will shut the other person down quickly when he or she realizes the comments didn’t phase you.

You choose how to react in any given situation, so choose happiness. It will keep your thoughts and actions positive, and show others that their rude words cannot take your power from you.

2. I appreciate your perspective.

Not only is this an intelligent approach, but it will also show the person that you only wish to communicate in an adult manner and not stoop to their level. Any rude comments reflect the other person’s shaky perception of themselves, so remember that when someone blurts out something tactless. They may want to bring you down, but you don’t have to let them. Show them that you will only continue the conversation with dignity and respect. They may respect you more by reacting in such a considerate way. If this doesn’t happen, shift your focus with this next tip.

3. This conversation is now over.

If you find yourself too angry to respond to someone civilly, end the conversation. You don’t want to cause permanent damage to a relationship by losing your cool, but you also don’t want to disrespect yourself by pretending like the person’s comments or questions are acceptable.

Choose to take the high road and not allow the conversation to continue, and you will be able to keep your dignity while skipping a potential all-out brawl or heated argument.

4. Why do you feel that was necessary, and do you really expect me to answer?

Especially in group settings, this will likely put the other person in check very quickly. Instead of getting the expected irate response out of you, they will meet a calm, cool and collected you, ready to talk things over sensibly and decently. Also, it will allow them to redeem themselves and apologize to you in front of your friends, family or co-workers.

Other people do need to know that you do not tolerate rude or uncalled-for questions and comments and that you will call attention to their uncouth behavior. If they say “yes” to the second part of your question, reply with “Well, it looks like this isn’t your lucky day,” and be done with the conversation.

5. That almost hurt my feelings.

While a little on the sarcastic side, it tells the other person that you choose not to absorb their negativity. It also deals with rude people maturely, and will probably discourage the other person from making any other remarks once they realize you aren’t affected by them.

6. You’re right.

While most people have a hard time saying these two words, it will benefit you to make the other person believe they were in the right in what they said, and will likely cause the conversation to be cut short. What more can they say after this comeback? You admit their rightness and then disengage from the conversation. While you might not get as much satisfaction by using this tactic, it will damper the other person’s enjoyment since they won’t get a rise out of you, which is what they were after in the first place.

7. You always have something negative to say, don’t you?

This takes the attention off of you and back onto them, making them think twice about their choice of conversation topics. Not only will you, rightfully so, draw their focus onto their own words, but also force them to reconsider what they say in the future.

Speaking your mind when a person repeats behavior that offends you is never wrong or uncalled for; if you need to draw attention to someone’s behavior, listen to your gut. The person’s negativity likely affects other people besides you, so making them aware of their toxic behavior will actually benefit you and others in future situations with this person.

8. I love myself, and I love you, too.

This may only apply in certain situations with friends, family, and your spouse. If you say it to your boss, you might get a strange look or get your name removed from the payroll, so use it at your discretion. However, this comeback had to appear on the list because of its effectiveness at shutting down rude people.

Kindness always prevails over negativity; darkness cannot thrive where light is present. When you express to the other person how much you love life and others, their comments become irrelevant and quickly lose power. Their sour mood and bleak outlook on themselves, you, and life will not be a match for your extreme happiness and zest for life. People also aren’t used to such raw emotions from others and will probably be too surprised to respond properly.

9. Laugh

This reaction will catch the offender off-guard and make a rude person feel embarrassed for even commenting in the first place. For instance, laugh if your aunt repeatedly brings up your recent job loss at dinner. It will make the present moment seem a little less serious, and will send a message that you don’t let other people’s rude comments affect your mood or outlook on life.

Final Thoughts on Controlling Your Response to Rude People

Your words can boost the entire energy of a room and promote more positive conversation. You can’t go wrong with that!You choose how to react in any given situation, so choose happiness! Add to the discussion below: How do you positively react to negative, rude people?

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9 Reasons to Stop Seeking Approval From Others

Why Do Some People Seek Approval From Others?

9 Things to Remember if You Seek the Approval of Others

You are the One in Control of Your Life

You are in Charge of Your Own Happiness

Seeking Approval from Others is Time-Consuming

Freedom Comes When you Depend Solely on Yourself

You Can’t Please Everyone, So Don’t Even Try

You Get to Know Yourself Better

You Drain Yourself of Valuable Energy

Asking for Approval Could Discourage you From Following Your Heart

Seeking Approval From Others Promotes Fear

Final Thoughts on the Human Desire to Ask for Approval

21 Small Ways to Love big:

1. Give more hugs!

5. Give a genuine “Thank You” more often.

13. Cuddle and/or have sex more.

18. Listen and be more conscious.

21. Get them a small, thoughtful gift.

Join the Conversation: Do something that isn’t on the list? We’d like to hear about it . . .

Here are 7 ideas on how you can create a living space that thrives…

1. Feng Shui

2. Native American “Smudging”

3. Have a Sacred space

4. Himalayan rock salt

5. Aromatherapy

6. Art & Décor

7. Balanced & Energetic Lighting

Here are 44 Ways to Boost Your Energy Naturally

1. Get up and walk around every thirty minutes.

2. Get out in nature.

3. Eat fruit.

4. Increase your magnesium intake.

5. Take a nap.

6. Never skip breakfast.

7. Exercise at least thirty minutes a day, five days a week.

8. Stay busy.

9. Get adequate sleep.

10. Limit your technology use.

11. Meditate.

12. Drink plenty of water.

13. Avoid artificial energy boosters like caffeine.

14. Splash cold water on your face.

15. Get up and stretch.

16. Have something to look forward to.

17. Hug someone.

18. Call up an old friend.

19. Take Vitamin D.

20. Give to the less fortunate.

21. Keep your space organized.

22. Eat power snacks.

23. Write down your goals.

24. Stay thankful.

25. Be loving.

26. Choose positivity.

27. Have a close circle of friends.

28. Avoid processed foods.

29. Implement natural lighting.

30. Give away things you no longer use.

31. Take a new road to and from work.

32. Share a funny story with co-workers.

33. Avoid negative television programs or movies.

34. Keep a journal.

35. Start a garden or plant flowers.

36. Stand on your head.

37. Consider adding natural herbs to your diet.

38. Watch a funny movie.

39. Visit your family.

40. Put on some upbeat music.

41. Avoid energy vampires.

42. Exercise before work.

43. Simplify your life.

44. Practice positive affirmations.

Final Thoughts of Finding Natural Methods to Boost Your Energy

6 Behaviors That Push People Away (and How to Reverse Them)

1. Selfishness

2. Conceitedness

3. Self-Righteousness

4. Perfectionism

5. Chronic Complaining

Join the Conversation:
Do something that isn’t on the list? We’d like to hear about it . . .

Rise and Shine On!
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