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7 Negative Behaviors You Need to Ignore

December 19, 2014 by Power of Positivity

Nearly every religion tells us that our beliefs determine our behaviors. Even ancient people relied on guidebooks to know that one’s life is a reflection of how they think. Nowadays, most of us would concur with the passage above. In fact, nearly every religion has a similar passage, demonstrating the uniformity around this belief.

“Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts.” – Proverbs 4:23

How our thought process is developed is a truly complex topic. It can be simply stated that the process develops in accordance with a number of internal and external factors. As such, we develop various behaviors both positive and negative. People that go through difficult situations in life have their thought processes impacted. In turn, this impacts a person’s behavior.

It is important to differentiate the behavior from the person.

We believe that a person is greater than the sum of his or her parts. We also believe that pain is often expressed in the form of negative behavior. Further, it is important to understand that ignoring the entire person is not the answer. Instead, develop your inner strength by ignoring the behavior while doing something positive for the person – prayer, a smile, positive energy, etc.

Here are 7 negative behaviors of people that you should ignore, and how you can help them…

1. Drama

Human beings have a flair for the dramatic. We have a flair for the dramatic because drama is everywhere around us – TV, magazines, movies, news, radio, the internet…no matter the outlet, drama is likely to be present.

This overwhelming presence of drama being depicted has resulted in people becoming literally addicted to the behavior. This dramatic behavior appears in a number of different ways in several different places. You probably encounter one of the following:

Co-workers who play the blame game
A friend that loves to gossip
The boss that demeans employees
Or, even the spouse or significant other that feels argument is a “healthy expression.”

Regardless of the source or severity, dramatic behavior is overwhelmingly negative. Instead of buying into this behavior when it’s directed towards you, conduct yourself with confidence and composure. The stronger the behavior, the more relaxed and positive you should be in response.

Be an example by communicating and expressing yourself peacefully. Don’t allow drama to impact the person you know that you are negatively.

2. Naysaying

Only one person knows your capabilities and what you can achieve – you. Any behavior directed towards you that aims to demean these capabilities and what you intend to achieve should be resisted to the utmost.

Denying or opposing your ambition through naysaying behavior should be considered unacceptable. Never allow the negative and unsubstantiated claims of others to limit how you think about and approach your ambitions, goals, and dreams.

This behavior manifests itself in other people’s opinions, presumptions, and other shunning words and actions about something you’re trying to accomplish. Simply put, never buy into this behavior.

Maybe you’ve been in this type of situation. It is important to look beyond this behavior and act confidently and positively in spite of it. Not only will you notice that your confidence is strengthened, but the guilty party will likely change their behavior as well.

3. Manipulation

Some people are always on the lookout for others that they can use to advance their agenda, whatever that may be, through whatever means possible. This is manipulative behavior in a nutshell.

People that attempt to manipulate often do so by playing on other people’s emotions. They generally don’t trust the logical capabilities of others and seek to “pull the wool over” their eyes. Truly a sad state, but this type of behavior exists.

There is no easy way to detect this behavior, but one way is to look at the person’s track record. Have you caught them in a lie? Do they have a generally negative attitude? Have they spread rumors or gossiped about someone? Do they display predominantly individualistic types of behaviors?

Generally, people that display manipulative behavior display these and other “red flags” that can potentially unveil their capability to manipulate. These individuals also have an egotistical streak, thinking that they are smarter and craftier than anyone else.

Be aware of manipulative behavior by remaining vigilant in your dealings with others. Remain positive and confident while sending positivity and encouragement to these types of individuals. This could be the difference in changing their perspective along with their behavior.

4. Stubbornness

What characterizes stubborn behavior?

Refusing to listen to others’ opinions
Being adamant that your ideas or desires are the most important
Refusing change

The truth is that we all display stubborn behavior at times. However, there are people that display this behavior at a magnitude that far exceeds the norm.

As with most other behavioral traits, stubbornness onsets through early negative experiences. Stubbornness may stem from a parent’s disposition, violations of trust, and other instabilities displayed throughout childhood.

Forget about the unfortunate circumstances that trigger the behavior. Stubbornness is difficult to deal with and comes in many forms. You may have a co-worker that refuses to listen, a parent that constantly judges, or others who refuse to give you the benefit of the doubt.

The solution is to be you around these individuals while directing positivity (in any form) towards them. Above all, don’t respond with any stubborn behavior of your own. Instead, show that you are a trustworthy, compassionate, understanding individual who appreciates the positive things about them.

5. Impatience

Impatience can be defined as (1) irritable behavior that results from delays or (2) a restless need for change and excitement. The display of impatient behavior is often tied into someone’s goals; specifically, anything that hinders or aggravates the person in active pursuit of these goals. These goals could range from getting ahead of you at the drive-thru to getting that promotion at work.

As with stubbornness, we all tend to be impatient at times. However, some individuals take impatience to the extreme. These individuals detest being held up at anytime, anywhere, for almost any reason.

Impatience is a trait that develops from early negative experiences, misunderstanding the nature of self and others, and a persistent sense of insecurity. Early negative experiences often happen during childhood. In many cases, parents barred the child from having a normal social experience resulting in a sense of “missing out”.

When dealing with an impatient person, it is important to understand how they “tick.” For example, these individuals prefer to be in control. When they are not in firm control, they become angry, annoyed and frustrated. The best way to deal with the behavior is to be polite but direct. Do not beat around the bush with impatient people; this will get you nowhere.

Direct positivity towards impatient people, but do so in an assertive way while standing up for yourself. Have you ever heard the term “firm but fair?” This certainly applies to dealing with the impatient.

6. Annoyance

Annoyance is simply the state of mind when something (or someone) irritated or angered you. Being irritated or angered by someone also causes the annoyed person to be distracted, which only adds to the annoyance factor; effectively increasing the possibility of a heated exchange. In this way, annoying behavior is a double-edged sword.

Whether or not a certain behavior is annoying is often a matter of perspective. Some people will find a certain behavior annoying while others will not. Do you have one or more “pet peeves?” Well, most people do not have the same reactions when encountering these behaviors. Annoying behavior is very subjective, which makes sense considering the person has absolutely no idea that their behavior is annoying in most cases.

The best way to deal with any behavior that annoys you is to control your emotions. Take a deep breath, let it out slowly, and focus on breathing normally. Understand that the person is not directing the behavior at you.

You can also practice using one word to set in your mind until the desire to react passes. For example, relax your body, close your eyes and think of the word “calm.” Repeat this word while imagining calm flow through your body from head to toe.

At times, you may need to stand up for yourself. Of course, do so privately and politely, but be firm and direct. Show appreciation for the person, even before the individual agrees to change their behavior. Doing so will drastically increase the likelihood that the behavior will change – at least around you!

7. Self-criticism

Last, but certainly not least, is our own inner critic. Just as the above six behavioral characteristics of others does not necessarily define them, your biggest critic doesn’t necessarily define you.

What you consider flaws are actually marks of individuality. Many people considered the most beautiful, wealthiest, most privileged people on this planet are incredibly lonely and depressed. Why? Simple – they are always their worst critic despite of these “advantages.” Perfectionism is a myth; there is nothing perfect…and this certainly includes us.

While the previous seven behaviors may be difficult to contend with, they don’t hold a stick to self-criticism. It is crucial that you take care of yourself, ignore negative thoughts (“tabloids of the mind”), and accept yourself for who you are.

3 Powerful Techniques to Boost Your Self-Confidence

December 17, 2014 by Power of Positivity

Several studies prove that people with high levels of self-confidence and self-esteem are happier overall and better able to meet the demands of challenging tasks at work and in their personal lives. Unfortunately, self-confidence isn’t an innate part of everyone. This is particularly true for sensitive people. These are individuals that can internalize criticism and past hurts so deeply that their self-image becomes deeply tarnished.

“Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings.” – Samuel Johnson

Still, there is hope for anyone who struggles with self-confidence. Simple actions and mindfulness can make a big impact on your self-esteem. Even better, you can begin fostering a positive self-image with these three simple methods.

Use these three tips to boost your self-confidence

1. Grow self-love with Mirror Work.

Many of us unknowingly engage in negative self-talk, cutting ourselves down with cruel words and criticisms that tear away at our confidence. Pioneered by best-selling author Louise Hay, Mirror Work helps counteract those unfair, negative words, replacing them with positive, uplifting language that can mend deep wounds and bolster your self-confidence.

Every time that you pass a mirror or see a reflection stop for a second. Look at your face and give yourself the gift of heartfelt confidence. Then, say a positive affirmation like “I am in control of my own happiness!” or “I bear witness to my success today!” Do this even just twice every day, and you’ll begin to quiet that negative self-talk, replacing it with the language of self-love.

2. Get Up and Move.

Finding an exercise activity that you enjoy and engaging in it regularly can help you dramatically increase your self-confidence. With each practice or session, you’ll notice improvements in your technique, endurance, and strength. Improving will help you begin to appreciate all that your body is capable of, fostering self-esteem that nothing can take away.

The key is to choose something that challenges you but is also inspiring. Hitting the gym and running are great options for fitness but don’t restrict yourself to these activities if they fill you with dread. Yoga, dance classes, tennis, cycling, skiing, golf, and other activities that get you off the sofa and moving are all possible options.

3. Seek Out Positive People.

There is a growing movement in education, known as “The Bucket Fillers.” Inspired by the children’s book by Carol McCloud, it encourages kids to be positive forces in the world and to commit acts of kindness instead of cruelty. The idea is that everyone is a bucket and that the actions of others can either take water out and steal their happiness or pour water in and fill the bucket, increasing happiness. In your own life, you can probably name a handful of people who are bucket fillers and many more who are always dipping their hands into your bucket and taking water away.

Seek out those people who are positive forces that build you up rather than diminishing your spirit while you may not be able to avoid the others entirely. The more time that you spend with positive people, the less impact those negative individuals will have on you.

Final Thoughts About Growing Self-Confidence

You deserve to feel great about yourself every day. It does not matter what has clouded your vision and diminished your appreciation of yourself. Indeed, you can take positive steps to see yourself clearly again and appreciate the beautiful person that you truly are. So start incorporating these three techniques in your daily life. Each one will give you a strong foundation for building self-confidence. And that puts you on the path to changing your life for the better.

9 Reasons to Start your New Year’s Resolution Right Now

December 16, 2014 by Power of Positivity

Have you begun to give thought to your New Year’s Resolution? If not, it is time.

According to the Journal of Clinical Psychology at the University of Scranton, these 5 resolutions are the most popular:

Lose Weight
Get Organized
Spend Less, Save More
Enjoy Life to the Fullest
Stay Fit and Healthy

If you have any goals such as these in mind to put into action when the clock strikes 12 on January 1^st, who’s to say you can’t start right now?

Many people wait until the new year to begin new projects or set new goals because a new calendar year implies starting over with a clean slate. At dinner on New Year’s Eve, friends and families gather all over the world and share their favorite moments from the year before, making a resolution for the next year and pledging to commit to them. Most people look at the new year as a chance at a whole new life, and it is – but why can’t your new life start now? It can, and there are plenty of reasons why starting your new year’s resolutions today is actually more beneficial in the long run.

9 Reasons to Start Your New Year’s Resolution Right Now:

1 – Every Day You Wake Up is a Chance to Start Over

Why wait until a certain date to transform your life? You can set goals and chase dreams every day when you get out of bed; you don’t need a calendar to tell you when you can make resolutions. Most people wait until the new year to make changes in their lives because it gives them an excuse to procrastinate and even give up their goals altogether. Also, when you set a future date to start something, you invalidate the present moment.

Right now is as good a time as any to start something new and exciting, and you are more than capable of transforming your life today!

2 – You Can Accomplish a Lot Between Now and the New Year

In a sense, if you postpone your goals to a later date, you will lose valuable time that you could spend to manifest your dreams. Think of how much you can get done between now and the new year. For example, imagine that you want to adopt a healthier lifestyle that includes more fruits and vegetables and a regular exercise routine. You could start feeling more vibrant and having more energy now instead of waiting until the new year, and you will feel accomplished knowing you beat everyone else to the punch and started your New Year’s resolutions early!

“Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today.” – Benjamin Franklin

3 – Time is Just an Illusion Anyway

Humans invented the idea of time as a way to measure events and order them from past to present. Even though it makes us more aware of deadlines and gives us a way to track important life events, the only real-time is the “Now.” Without getting too technical, the past, present, and future all exist simultaneously, converging and forming a continuous flow of energy. You can create whatever reality you want to see right at this moment, and that will set the stage for every subsequent moment you experience. While the idea of time can be comforting, you don’t need to set goals for a certain date in order to achieve them. You can simply have an action plan and pursue your goals in each moment without the added pressure of time.

4 – The “Right Time” is Any Time

A lot of people spend a large portion of their lives waiting for a sign to tell them it’s the right time to pursue a goal, or wait until they feel ready. But, why can’t right now be the right time? If you wait until tomorrow, you might still think you’re not ready to wake your dreams into reality. Here’s a secret: you are ready if you just believe it. Your mind creates your reality, so make sure your thoughts stay positive!

You can achieve anything you want at any time if you simply have faith in yourself and your abilities. You were born ready. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be here on this planet right now. We all have a divine purpose, and we were put on this Earth to execute that purpose in only the way we know how.

5 – You Will Stay More Organized

When we put off goals or errands, we invite chaos and disorganization into our lives. For example, if you have five important projects that you want to finish by a certain date, but you put them off until the last minute, you will have to complete all of them in a shorter timeframe. This puts a lot of unnecessary stress on you as you scramble to get everything is done, which means your workspace will likely reflect your inner state of being. Then, important papers might get lost, you could accidentally delete files off your computer, or you might totally forget about a project altogether.

To prevent this from happening, just start your projects or goals ahead of time. Then, you will have more time to work on your goals and can keep your workspace and your brain more organized.

6 – You Can Eliminate Added Stress

When people make their new year’s resolution, they hold themselves to very high standards to accomplish their goals. Making a resolution has become a trademark of the holiday, and many feel that the New Year is incomplete without making declarations to change their lives in the upcoming year. However, when you announce your goals to your friends or family at a party or dinner, you might feel obligated to follow through with your plans to avoid embarrassment or shame in the future.

Simply put, people hype up their new year’s resolution and often feel very disappointed and stressed when they don’t follow through with them. By starting on them now, you will be more likely to commit to them long-term if they aren’t attached to traditions or expectations from others.

7 – There’s Less Pressure

When the new year rolls around and people start making the resolution to live life to the fullest, lose fifty pounds, get a new job, or travel the world, they put a lot of pressure on themselves. If you just commit to living better each day and don’t use a holiday as a starting point to transform your life and start anew, you can eliminate that added pressure. You can make goal-setting and living the life you want a daily habit rather than a highly overrated holiday activity.

8 – You’re Likely to Set More Realistic Goals

Since a lot of hype surrounds your New Year’s resolution, many people set grandiose goals that they usually never follow through with. Also, a lot of people set too many goals and don’t take into account the time they have to work on them. If you have more time to think about your plans and don’t just blurt out a resolution that sounds impressive, you will likely set more realistic goals for your lifestyle.

9 – There’s a Better Chance You’ll Stick to them Long-term

Since only 23 percent of people who set a New Year’s resolution actually follow through with them, according to a survey by FranklinCovey, you will have a higher chance of sticking to your guns if you set goals on your own terms. When you treat each day as a gift, a chance for a new beginning instead of waiting for that magical first day of the year, you will have more control of your life and realize that you create your future every single day.

51 Ancient Wisdoms that Will Change the Way You Think

December 16, 2014 by Power of Positivity

They say that time is the best teacher, which it may indeed be. However, considering some of the great words spoken long ago, we can benefit from heeding the ancient advice from some of history’s great minds.

So we’ve compiled a list of 51 of the greatest quotes on various topics – from action to work – these words will forever be a great source of knowledge and inspiration.

GREATEST INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES…EVER!

Enjoy this A to Z list of quotes of life’s important topics.

1 – Action

“Actions speak louder than words.” – Abraham Lincoln, 1809-1865

The Great Emancipator also happened to think that it’s our own actions that define us.

2 – Adversity

“Every adversity carries with it the seed of equal or greater benefit.” – Napoleon Hill, 1883-1970

3 – Ambition

“First say to yourself what would you be; and then do what you need to do.” – Epictetus, Greek Philosopher, c. 55-135

The ancient Greeks had many wise sayings, this ancient quote on ambition being one of them.

4 – Anger

“If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.” – Ancient Chinese Proverb

5 – Beauty

“Beauty is only skin deep.” – Sir Thomas Overbury, 1581-1613

The originator of this quote is an English poet, which makes sense given the short but thoughtful quote on beauty.

6 – Change

“A rolling stone gathers no moss.” – John Heywood, 1947-1580

Yet another great English writer and poet delivering a message on change.

7 – Consequences

“A guilty conscience needs no accuser.” – English Proverb

8 – Courage

“Courage is not the absence of fear; it is the conquest of it.” – William Danforth, 1870-1955

A great quote from another writer on mastering fear.

9 – Creativity

“Imagination is more important than knowledge.” – Albert Einstein, 1879-1955

Yet, many still label the creative among us as “weird”. The smartest person in history certainly didn’t think so.

10 – Criticism

“The worst enemy you have is right in your head.” – Unknown

11 – Death

“Death never takes a wise man by surprise; he is always ready to go.” – Jean de Lafontaine, 1621-1695

Lafontaine, a French poet, sums up death by being ready for it.

12 – Differences

“Different strokes for different folks.” – Clarence Darrow, 1857-1938

The lawyer and once-leading member of the ACLU recognized and appreciated differences.

13 – Experience

“Experience teaches slowly and at the cost of mistakes.” – James Anthony Froude, 1818-1894

Mistakes are part of the experience, according to this English historian.

14 – Family

“A father’s a treasure; a brother’s a comfort; a friend is both.” – Benjamin Franklin

15 – Foolishness

“Fools and scissors require good handling.” – Japanese Proverb

16 – Forgiveness

“Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill.” – Henry Ellis, 1721-1805

This famous quote was brought to you by an ancient Irish explorer.

17 – Fortune

“It is possible to have too much of a good thing.” – Aesop, c. 620-560 B.C.

Another ancient Greek, another famous quote; this one on fortune.

18 – Friendship

“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” – Unknown

19 – Generosity

“What you do to others will bear fruit in you.” – Sinhalese

The largest ethnic group in Sri Lanka has some words on giving generously.

20- Gossip

“Not everything you hear is good for talk.” – Japanese Proverb

Those Japanese are pretty smart, I hear…that’s good gossip.

21 – Gratitude

“Since we cannot get what we like, let us like what we can get.” – Spanish Proverb

22 – Habit

“Character is habit long continued.” – Greek Proverb

23 – Health

“Eat to live, not live to eat.” – Socrates, 469-399 B.C.

The infamous Greek philosopher had some words on indulgence.

24 – Honesty

“Honesty is the best policy.” – Aesop

25 – Hope

“The darkest hours are just before the dawn.” – English Proverb

26 – Humility

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Gandhi

This wouldn’t be a complete list without the great Indian leader’s words on humility.

27 – Identity

“If the shoe fits, wear it.” – Nicholas Breton, c. 1545-1626

Another English poet makes an appearance, taking credit for this adage on identity.

28 – Joy

“Out of the fullness of the heart, the mouth speaks.” – Chaucer, c. 1343-1400

Perhaps the greatest English poet in history shows us why with this terrific quote on joy.

29 – Justice

“The end doesn’t justify the means.” – Ovid, c. 43 B.C. – 18 AD

Ovid was a brilliant Roman poet who also gave us this notorious quote on justice.

30 – Knowledge

“Knowledge is power.” – Francis Bacon, 1561-1626

Truly an Englishman of many hats – scientist, orator, essayist, author, politician – Bacon also gave us this tremendously powerful quote.

31 – Leadership

“Even the largest army is nothing without a good general.” – Afghan saying

32 – Learning

“A man who asks is a fool for five minutes. A man who never asks is a fool for life.” – Chinese Proverb

33 – Love

“A loving heart is the truest wisdom.” – Charles Dickens, 1812-1870

The infamous author of ‘The Christmas Carol’ also had a word or two to say about love.

34 – Nature

“Nature is the art of God.” – Latin saying

35 – Opportunity

“Opportunities come but do not linger.” – Nepalese saying

36 – Patience

“Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.” – French proverb

37 – Perseverance

“Slow and steady wins the race.” – Aesop

38 – Poverty

“Poverty is the worst form of violence.” – Gandhi

Gandhi despised violence; this quote demonstrates that he despised poverty at the utmost.

39 – Prayer

“Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his brother.” – Kahlil Gibran, 1883-1931

Gibran, a Lebanese artist, poet and writer, delivered this wonderful quote on the importance of faith in the face of doubt.

40 – Pride

“The higher you climb, the heavier you fall.” – Vietnamese Proverb

41 – Revenge

“The old law about an eye for an eye leaves everybody blind.” – Martin Luther King Jr., 1929-1968

42 – Strength

“Control your emotions or they will control you.” – Chinese Proverb

43 – Success

“We learn little from victory, much from defeat.” – Japanese Proverb

44 – Temptation

“If passion drives, let reason hold the reigns.” – Benjamin Franklin

45 – Truth

“Be sure you are right, then go ahead.” – Davy Crockett, 1786-1836

The “King of the Wild Frontier” also had a reputation as an honest and straightforward fellow.

46 – Vanity

“The drum makes a great fuss because it is empty.” – Trinidadian Saying

47 – Virtue

“You are what you think about.” – Buddha

48 – War

“War is sweet to those who haven’t experienced it.” – Latin Saying

49 – Wealth

“Wealth is but dung; useful only when spread.” – Chinese Proverb

50 – Wisdom

“Wisdom is ofttimes nearer when we stoop than when we soar.” – William Wordsworth, 1770-1850

Wordsworth is an English poet who launched the Romantic Age in English literature…it’s easy to see why.

51 – Work

“Genius is ninety percent perspiration and ten percent inspiration.” – Thomas Edison, 1847-1931

Pretty powerful stuff coming from perhaps the greatest inventor in human history.

5 Ways to Clear Your Mind of “Can’t”

December 15, 2014 by Power of Positivity

All of us have goals, ambitions, and dreams. Some of us persevere quite well when attempting to reach our goals, while some of us can use some help. Mindset is the biggest difference between these two groups. The people that reach their goals have a mind set of “can,” while others often think “can’t”.

If you are currently experiencing difficulties in achieving what you want out of life, there is hope. You can clear your mind of those thoughts that are sabotaging your progress. Even if you are relatively successful and happy, enhancing the innate ability to motivate yourself and clearing mental roadblocks can bring you to a new level.

“Whether you think you can, or think you can’t – you’re right.” – Henry Ford, speaking on the power of the mind

Here are 5 ways to clear your mind of the “can’t” mentality.

1. Realize you’re holding yourself back

This can certainly be a difficult pill to swallow. Most of us are prideful and can shun accountability for ourselves at times. However, when you realize that only you have the control over your life, it is a tremendously powerful motivator.

Notice the first word: “realize”. It’s there because many of us aren’t even attuned to the fact that we are the major roadblock – not co-workers, bosses, or other external factors.

According to research conducted on rationalization (i.e. “making excuses”), the internalization of perceived failure affects self-esteem; which in turn negatively affects your thoughts and behavior. In layman’s terms – we are not good at letting go.

We must let go of our perceived failures in order to succeed in this lifetime. We can only let go of these failures by being present in each and every situation – whether at work, home, or somewhere else. Focusing on what needs to be done in the present without rehashing past failures is the answer. Be present.

2. Reverse your “cants” to “cans”

This may sound cliché, but we are the sum of our thoughts. It is important to affirm and declare your goals in order to motivate your thinking, particularly during the difficult times.

Affirmations are an incredibly powerful and effective way to do this. Essentially, affirmations are often-repeated, positive statements used to describe a desired situation until they get impressed into your subconscious mind.

Even athletes, such as Muhammad Ali, have used affirmations to enhance their performance. According to Ali, “It’s the repetition of affirmations that leads to belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen.”

If the greatest boxer in history achieved his success in no small part to affirmations, we should certainly take notice.

Here’s a quick “how-to” guide on how to use affirmations.

– Identify and write down negative self-talk and beliefs (or “cants)

– Create and write down positive affirmations (or “cans”); the opposite of the items on the first list

– Begin using the new affirmations. Post the written list in an area that you visit frequently to remind yourself.

– Watch things begin to happen.

3. Remind yourself of what you’ve overcome

It’s normal to want to be and achieve more. It’s healthy. It’s what keeps us going. That being said, we need to remind ourselves of our past successes from time to time. This is important because when we feel stuck, past accomplishments serve as a reminder of the potential inside of us to achieve success.

Your life wasn’t handed to you on a plate; you had to earn it. Give yourself some credit for overcoming obstacles as they’ve presented themselves. You’ve become a stronger person having gone through these trials. This accumulated strength makes it possible for you to move forward and continue your path in life.

Maybe you got a promotion in a past job, lost weight, graduated college or something else that made you feel inspired. Keep in mind how far you’ve come. Write a list of the things you’re proud of; then come back and read this list whenever you lack confidence to move forward in your life.

4. Accept and love yourself

Do you accept who you are as a person? What characteristics do you love about yourself?

These are two questions that you should be able to answer without too much thought. The truth is, there is nothing wrong with you. Whatever shortcomings you may feel can be overcome with time and effort, but they don’t mean that you are deficient as a person.

Self-acceptance is a necessary component to live a fulfilling life. You must let go of the thought patterns and behaviors that are interrupting your path towards growth. Often times, these are a matter of perception. We can choose to perceive ourselves as unworthy and handicapped, or we can focus on our strengths and capabilities.

Be aware of thoughts that pop into your head that can damage your self-image. Understand that these impulses do not truly reflect who you are a person…they are just thoughts. Let them go. If you feel your behavior needs to be changed, then change them; but don’t feel that you are unworthy to live a fulfilling life.

When you embrace and accept yourself, you allow self-love to manifest. Self-love is simply the act of living while remaining true to yourself. It’s an expression of your own acceptance, allowing you to support your progression through life. This is not applicable only to your finances and career; in fact, these are not even close to being most important. Your emotional, psychological and spiritual growth is where the self-love truly occurs.

5. Take action

Here is where many of us get caught up…actually doing it. This is because we have a tendency to think way too much…we wait until we feel like taking action. The big problem with this is that we’ll never feel motivated enough to accomplish the difficult, but necessary, tasks to achieve our goals.

The solution? Just take the first step. For example, you want to get into better shape (who doesn’t)? Getting into better shape requires exercise and eating right. Now, you don’t feel like going to the gym or changing your eating habits. This is too difficult, you think to yourself.

Don’t feel like going to the gym? Okay…just put on your workout clothes. Then, just walk out the front door. Now that you are out of the house, it would be counterproductive and silly to just walk back in and do nothing, so you end up at the gym.

Don’t want to change your eating habits? Okay…just make out a grocery list. You don’t have to buy anything, but you have a list of stuff that you could if you wanted. A day or so later, you head to the grocery store with the list of healthy food. Convenient, since now you don’t have to think about what to buy. Just put your mind to it.

See how this works? Just take the first step, and you’ll notice that once you are in motion your motivation and drive will happen naturally.

The Single Best Pain Reliever on the Planet

December 15, 2014 by Power of Positivity

Don’t reach for pain relievers in your medicine cabinet or pay for expensive treatments to alleviate pain. Instead, try this age-old trick known as the best medicine on Earth…

Laughter.

That’s right; you don’t have to resort to over-the-counter medications with dangerous side effects to experience pain relief. Indeed, you can simply laugh more and get the same results for free. The best thing about laughter is that it’s easily accessible everywhere. Of course, you can laugh at funny movies, your children, your friends, your family, and even yourself!

Experts believe that a hearty chuckle can release endorphins in the brain which can ease muscle tension, decrease pain, and even boost the immune system. In addition to those benefits, laughter also offers other benefits. Those advantages include reduced stress, improved blood flow and even a reduced risk for high blood pressure.

The proof

In 2009, two studies presented at the American College of Sports Medicine’s yearly meeting in Seattle concluded that laughter allows for the dilation of blood vessels. In turn, this effect increases blood flow and vascular health.

The first study performed by researchers involved a handful of healthy adults who watched either a comedy or documentary. During the films, the doctors checked their carotid arteries. Of course, those are the main arteries in the neck that transport blood to the brain and face.

People who watched the comedy showed higher “arterial compliance,” or the amount of blood that flows through the arteries. If blood flow is restricted, it can lead to high blood pressure and heart disease, according to the American College of Sports Medicine news release.

In the second study, the researchers found that the group of adults who watched a comedy had further dilated blood vessels than the group who watched the documentary. Constricted blood vessels can lead to high blood pressure, according to the news release. Surprisingly, the documentary actually restricted the participant’s blood vessels by 18 percent.

Results

In both cases, the positive effects of laughter lasted for a full 24 hours, proving that laughter can contribute to health long after the initial laughing occurs.

Another study performed in 2009 by cardiologists at the University of Maryland Medical Center in Baltimore revealed that laughter, paired with a lively sense of humor, may even help ward off heart attacks. The study found that people with heart disease were 40 percent less likely to laugh in many instances compared to people in the same age bracket without heart disease.

Michael Miller, M.D., director of the Center for Preventive Cardiology at the University of Maryland Medical Center, said that mental stress can impair the endothelium, or the protective barrier lining the blood vessels. He explained that this can lead to various inflammatory reactions that lead to fat and cholesterol build-up in the coronary arteries, which ultimately results in a heart attack.

In the study, researchers compared the reactions of 300 people. Half of the participants had either experienced a heart attack or undergone coronary artery bypass surgery. The other half did not have heart problems. The researchers passed out two questionnaires, one which had a series of questions with multiple-choice answers to discover how much or how little people laughed in certain conditions, and the second one listed statements in a true/false format to measure anger and hostility.

Miller revealed a noteworthy finding from the study. In it, he reveals that “people with heart disease responded less humorously to everyday life situations.”

Generally, they laughed less, even in positive situations, and displayed higher levels of anger or hostility.

“The ability to laugh — either naturally or as learned behavior — may have important implications in societies such as the U.S. where heart disease remains the number one killer,” says Miller. “We know that exercising, not smoking and eating foods low in saturated fat will reduce the risk of heart disease. Perhaps regular, hearty laughter should be added to the list.”

Even more good news about laughter

Possibly the most interesting fact about laughter is its ability to relieve pain and even increase the pain threshold of people. They may feel less pain after laughing because the body releases chemicals that act as a natural painkiller. In a study performed by researchers at the University of Oxford, they wanted to see how laughter would play a role in people’s pain tolerance.

The researchers first tested the pain thresholds of volunteers, who were split into two groups. The first group watched 15 minutes of comedy videos. On the other hand, the second group watched more “boring” programs, like golf tournaments. The study concluded that the participants who had recently experienced deep belly laughs were able to withstand up to 10 percent more pain than they could before viewing the videos. Interestingly, the other group tolerated less pain after watching 15 minutes of “boring” programs.

The type of laughter also played a role in the study: chuckles and giggles did not produce any physiological effect; only a long, hearty belly laugh did the trick.

Doctors agree

Professor Robin Dunbar of Oxford University, who directed the research, believes that uncontrollable laughter releases endorphins into the body which elicit mild euphoria and reduce pain.

“It’s the emptying of the lungs that causes [this effect],” he told BBC News.

“It’s exactly what happens when we say ‘I laughed until it hurt’. It seems to be extremely painful and it’s that pain that produces the endorphin effect.”

In addition to better heart health, decreased stress, higher pain tolerance, and better blood flow, studies have also shown that regular laughter can boost the immune system as well.

Patch Adams

Dr. Patch Adams, well-known for his promotion of laughter and humor in hospitals, has even started a free “silly” hospital in rural West Virginia. Remarkably, a poll of rural Midwestern cancer patients revealed that doctors utilized humor as one of the most frequently practiced CAM (complementary and alternative medicine) therapies. Scientists have also begun to explore the benefits of laughter by conducting clinical trials that measure targeted changes in psychological and physical health after laughter occurs.

Further Findings

In one study, conducted at the Indiana State University Sycamore Nursing Center, 33 healthy adult women were separated into two groups. The treatment group watched a funny video, while the control group viewed a tourism video. All participants filled out surveys asking their stress and humor levels before and after watching the videos. In addition, the researchers drew blood before and after treatment to test for natural killer cell levels.

In comparison to the control group, the treatment group reported a significant decrease in stress after watching the videos. Their stress level appeared inversely correlated with the amount of “mirthful” laughter they experienced. Participants with high scores on the questionnaire also had significantly higher numbers of natural killer cells after treatment, and the treatment group showed higher levels of these natural killer cells than the control group as well.

The researchers concluded that laughter seems to reduce stress and improve activity of natural killer cells, which could even reverse cancer.

Final Thoughts on Laughter Being the Best Pain Reliever

Research on how laughter plays a role in our mental and physical health is ongoing. However, the studies in recent years prove that consistent laughter makes a significant difference in our heart health. Additionally, it enhances our immune system performance and overall mood. Laughter is also infectious. So by laughing, you can also spread these positive effects to all your friends and family as well. If you need a good laugh, go for it. Just put on your favorite comedy, watch kids play, or bring out your own inner child to play! The opportunities to laugh are endless. Moreover, the benefits you experience from laughter will probably keep you coming back for more in the future!

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