Do you need a boost of self-confidence? If so, consider finding a mantra.

Mantras are a concept that many people are aware of and generally understand.  They generally consist of a phrase, set of words or sounds that you repeat in order to guide your life and essentially re-wire your mind in a different direction or thought pattern.  We all have mantras that we repeat regularly whether we know it or not.

In the last few of months, I got really tired of the mantras that had been running through my head.  They hadn’t been intentionally cultivated and they were starting to really drag me down.  I was consumed by thoughts that trapped me in my insecurities. Worse, they slowly wore down my confidence.  Negative thoughts had consumed me and it was time for a change.

Mantras helped me make that change.  I adopted these three mantras over the past two months. Already, they helped me to get back on track to where I wanted my headspace to be.  These are my mantras. I hope they help you with your self-confidence as much as they’ve helped me:

3 Mantras to Help You Regain Self-Confidence:

1 – “My time is too valuable to waste it worrying about the things I have no control over.”

This mantra came about because, obviously, because I was having obsessive thoughts about things I had no control over.  Worrying about these things wasn’t going to change the outcome.  All it was doing was robbing me of my sanity and peace of mind in the moment.  As soon as I decided that my time was valuable and needed to be respected and used in a more productive way, my thoughts changed and this mantra came into my mind.

Every time I started stressing out, worrying and thinking about scenarios that I had no control over, I would repeat this mantra and almost instantly my peace of mind would start to creep back in and I was able to once again enjoy life and regain self-confidence.

2 – “The outer is always a reflection of the inner.”

This is a great Buddhist philosophy and the more I welcome it into my life, the more apparent its truth becomes to me. Whatever is going on around you, whatever you are feeling, whichever situations are angering you or pleasing you, is a reflection of what is going on inside of you.  It is not a reflection of the innate state or meaning of that situation.  Futhermore, it is a reflection of you.  So, if you are feeling neglected by a friend or a lover, you are probably neglecting yourself.  If you are feeling loved by life and the things in your life, you are probably being loving yourself.

Nothing has a particular meaning to you until you decide it does.  You could be lacking money and choose to feel sorry for yourself or choose to be grateful for the fact that you are alive and have abundance in other forms.  It is not situations that dictate how you feel. It is YOU who dictates how you feel.  Every time a situation in my life starts to feel crappy to me, every time I start arguing with someone or feeling rejected by something, I try to remember this and instead of reacting to the situation, I try to explore what it is inside of me that is causing the bad feelings.

After I have done this, I can usually come to a place where I can respond in a way that is productive instead of creating more conflict in my life.  It is an incredibly beautiful and empowering thing.

3 – “I take nothing personally.”

I would bet that you, like most of us, take a lot of what other people do to you personally.  I found that a lot of my peace of mind and confidence was robbed by the fact that I thought other people’s feelings towards me reflected my own inadequacies.  But then something occurred to me: No one on this earth can see further than their own mind.  Everything anyone else is doing or feeling in relation to you, whether that means someone is offended by you, rude to you or loving to you, is a reflection of how they are feeling on the inside. In fact, they are not saying something about you.

No matter how perfect you are or how great of a person you are choosing to be, someone is always going to have something crappy to say about you.  Now does that mean that you should fully disregard the opinions of every other person on this planet? No. But it does mean that you can understand that most things in life are just that-opinions.  They are not right or wrong.

Don’t Ruin Your Own Self-Confidence

They are just a reflection of where someone is at in their life and that doesn’t have to define you in any way. You define you. No one else. So, don’t rob yourself of that self-confidence you deserve.

There’s a lot of pressure. We emphasize succeeding in our society. We want to do well in our career, have happy relationships, be a great parent, keep a tidy home, excel in our hobbies, and still find time to relax and just be. Keeping all these aspects of life in perfect balance can be rather demanding, and when we have too much demand we can tend to be harder on ourselves – especially if our progress is slower than we expect.

The power of positivity can always strongly influence your every day life, starting with your thoughts. When you are feeling down, like you aren’t succeeding in life, here are 10 reasons why you are! Remind yourself of the list as often as you need. You can never have too much inspiration.

10 Reasons You ARE Succeeding in Life:

1. You keep going, even after the challenges.

It can be easy to say, “I could never make it through this.”

The reality of life is that difficult moments happen to all of us.  Success does not mean that there’s a void of these trying times, it just means that you’ve decided to forge through them with resolve.  Every time you’ve stood back up and brushed yourself off as best as you could, you realized that it wasn’t long before the struggle was behind you and you were back on course.  It’s ok to stumble as you continue to make small steps toward success.

Keep this mentality moving forward and remember your resilience – you can bounce back again and again!

2. You grow stronger on the inside.

Experiences may not have always had the most positive result, but whether you realized it or not,  every one of these has increased your inner strength.  You’ve grown into who you are so that you could take today’s challenges head on.  As a stronger, wiser person, you can begin to see every outcome as an opportunity.  You see your experience as a teacher and know that with all lessons in life, there is always a takeaway.  Sometimes it’s victory and sometimes it’s strength – but your inner strength always continues to grow from these lessons.

3. You decide to love others.

Choosing love is the first step to success in any situation and an ability you always have on hand.  As you close the gate on hate, you begin to see the opportunities that love brings into view and how much easier it is to find success in the present moment.

As you choose to allow more love for yourself and others, more positive energy surrounds your experience, continuing to lift you higher and higher.

4. You recognize your accomplishments.

Feeling down because you are not where you expect to be is common, and it keeps us striving to do better, but you know it’s not a place you want to get stuck.

When the feeling sets in that you’re falling short of the goal, you remember the previous accomplishments you’ve had so far. You switch your focus from the lack by reminding yourself about all of the good things you have done and are doing right now. Celebrating and paying attention to previous success (in even the small things) helps maintain a better positive mental attitude.

This is a great exercise to practice especially before bed (instead of worrying). You’ll find you fall asleep easier and it’s a habit that leads to more success.  The dominant thoughts you have before bed replay in your mind at night, and since your thoughts help create your future, it’s important to have positive ones.

5. You follow your own path as much as you can.

Intuition guides us all through our path in life.  Recognizing your individual calling and making the decision to stray from the herd and blaze your own trail is what makes big differences in your own outcome. In fact, it’s vital in succeeding.

If you feel like you’re being singled out, remember that the path to your best life is unique, and continuing on it, regardless of what the “normal” route to success may be, is just as good as anyone else’s.  Richard Branson is a perfect example of this.  His path has been anything BUT normal, but his success is apparent.

6. You work on overcoming fears.

Overcoming fears doesn’t always come as easy as some people make it sound, and you’re aware of the fact.  But once again, you see the importance of progress over perfection.  If swimming isn’t your thing, dipping your toes in the water as a first step is every bit as important as going at it alone in the open ocean.  Future daredevils don’t jump the Grand Canyon in their very first practice, and you understand that you’re not failing at releasing the fear if it’s not completely gone on the first attempt.

Keep taking your small steps and know that with each one, you’re closer than you were yesterday.

7. You respect yourself.

There are more than a few unsavory ways to find money, fame or success.  When you respect yourself and your values, you see that your path to success can still come just as easily.  As you remain “in alignment” with what feels good to you, a clear conscience becomes even more valuable than the superficial reward of turning a blind eye to your own self-respect.

8. You are learning to love yourself more.

We talk often about the importance of loving yourself. We aren’t talking about egotistical, selfish “love”. We’re talking about real, true healthy love for who you are and the unique gifts you bring to the world.  The essence of your being is amazing. And, it’s an important part of succeeding.

When you get to know that person you should embrace it and enjoy it. Let go of the tiny, pesky imperfect traits that bother you and hug yourself for the magnificence that you possess inside. Love it so much that you aren’t afraid to show it to the world. You WANT to be yourself no matter who you are around. In fact, being yourself attracts more people to you. People are naturally attracted to loving, happy, genuine people.

9. You release judgement.

Letting go of the urge to judge isn’t something that comes easy for everyone, but you know that passing judgment onto another is not going to get you any further than where you were.  There is a great freedom that comes in “minding your business”, and you can decide to take full advantage of the moment to be your best self, not someone else’s.

10. You remain grateful

The difference-maker in your life comes from the daily gratitude reminders you give yourself.  Whether it’s one, three, or a hundred reasons to be grateful, you see what you do have rather than what you don’t.  An optimistic outlook not only turns your perspective around, it’s what ultimately helps change your life.

Final Thoughts on Measuring When You Are Succeeding

Write at least three things you’re grateful for in a notebook each morning.  Review at the end of each month and you’ll quickly see how the things you are grateful for have grown.

Next time you’re feeling hard on yourself, remember to revisit this list as often as you need – you can never have too many resources (even when you’re already succeeding!)

How aware are you of the thoughts, feelings, and sensations inside your body? Do you ever truly focus on every sensation you experience? If so then you are probably a believer in mindfulness. Mindfulness is a very important concept in Buddhism and it focuses on the concept that by being in the moment and being aware of every thought and feeling your body experiences you can enhance your physical and mental well being.

Here are six ways you can become more mindful:

1 – Rise and Shine

Being mindful can start from the minute you wake up every morning. Before you jump out of bed to get on with your day take some time to focus on the environment you are waking up in and the sensations of the world around you. If you start your day in a mindful day then you will start it calm and relaxed, and you will find your days are calmer and happier.

2 – Enjoy Your Food 

Many people are so time poor that they wolf down their food, and a vast percentage of the population even eat their lunch at their desk whilst continuing with their work at the same time. Instead to eat more mindfully, eating should be the only thing you focus on. Taste your food, savor every mouthful, and experience the flavors and textures you may never have experienced before.

3 – Stop Multitasking

We live in a society where people value multitasking and the ability to do more than one thing at the same time is highly praised. However multitasking doesn’t make you more productive: if anything it can slow you down and cause unnecessary stress and pressure. Use mindfulness to focus wholly on just one task at a time and you’ll find yourself feeling calmer and happier, and less prone to rushing or making mistakes.

4 – Take a Walk

In our rushed and modern society we are used to always being busy. However one of the best ways to be mindful and focus on yourself is to simply take time out. Take a walk and and think about how that meditative exercise makes you feel. Focus on your breathing and on how your body feels as you move it. Even a walk to the grocery store or round the block can become mindful walking if you focus your mind as you do it.

5 – Let it Ring

When your phone rings don’t rush mindlessly to answer it. Instead take a second or two to focus on your breathing and gather your thoughts before you answer. Focus on the effect the ringing phone has on your body (it causes many people to become more tense, for example) and breath deeply before you mindfully take your call.

6 – Capture The Scene

Finally, if you really want to be as mindful as possible in your everyday life then try your hand at mindful photography: no camera required! Take mental photographs of everything you find interesting and everything you’d like to remember as you do around your everyday life. Think about what details you’d like to capture and take the time to focus on them to commit them to memory.

 

Ever wish that you were happier?

Long hours at the office, a lack of sleep, poor nutrition and other stressors chip away at your happiness. And that leaves you feeling less than savory at the end of the day. If you find yourself feeling stressed or flooded with this kind of negative energy, it’s important to remember that you are in control of  your thoughts, and ultimately, your life.

It is up to you to get happier, and to do that, positive changes must be made.

It’s a proven fact that more people in this world want happiness in their life over being rich or famous.  Unlike becoming rich and/or famous, reaching your own state of happification doesn’t have to be hard.  In fact, it can be FUN when you use proven methods that work best for you.    The great part about happiness is that ANYONE can find it.  Here are 5 of our favorites:

5 Scientifically Proven Ways to Get Happier Right Now

1. Drink Green Tea

The ancient secrets of green tea have always been revered for its soothing and relaxing qualities.  This sweet little leaf has also been shown to improve mood. A University study released scientific results showing that people who consumed green tea were more relaxed, attentive, and in a better mood overall. So sit down, have a cup, and cheer up!

2. Exercise more

Exercise releases proteins and endorphins in the brain that makes us happier, acting as a cure (and preventative agent) for depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and many other afflictions.

A study published by the National Institutes of Health can reduce anxiety, improve mood, increase brain power and provide many other health benefits.  More research has also revealed that if you exercise within the first 20 minutes of being active, you’ll witness the benefits of having a better day overall.

3. Meditate

Numerous scientific studies (over 200 in 2013) concluded that there are many positive benefits to meditation, including statements from the American Medical Association that say meditation is a beneficial practice.

One study in particular involved Neuroscientists at Harvard University who conducted a study that shows the brain can be physically changed with meditative practice.

In the study, Anatomical magnetic resonance images (MRI) were taken of 16 healthy participants before and after they underwent an 8-week Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) program. This program is one of the most widely-practiced by those seeking better mental functioning and emotional control.

After the program was completed, the second set of MRI scans were taken. The images showed increased gray matter concentration in 4 regions of the brain, including the hippocampus and cerebellum, responsible for learning and memory processes and emotional regulation! The participants reported improved mental processing, emotional balance, and other benefits.

With all of this scientific support, it’s easy to see why meditation should be instantly recognized as a go-to source to get happier!

4. Sleep more

Sleep helps the body recover and repair, and also helps us focus and be more productive. It turns out, it’s also important for our happiness.

In the book titled NurtureShock, authors Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman recall one specific study that revealed sleep-deprived people fail to recall positive memories, as well as negative ones.  In one experiment, sleep-deprived college students tried to memorize a list of words. They only remembered 81% of negative terms. However, they could only remember 31% of neutral or positive words.

Another study using facial recognitions proved that naps can block, or even reverse negative emotional reactions, while simultaneously boosting happy ones.

How well (and long) you sleep has a powerful effect on how you feel and your overall attitude throughout the day. Even the simple act of going to bed earlier has been shown to improve your sense of humor!

5. Get happier with gratitude

When life gives you a losing hand, remember how wonderful it is to still be sitting at the card table.  There is always, always, always something to be grateful for. It might even be the fact that you’re breathing and reading this.

Science shows that just by writing down what you’re grateful for, your mood can improve drastically.  Another study shows that by expressing gratitude, depression can decrease, and happiness and overall satisfaction with life can increase.

For further reading, check out these 7 ways you to rewire your brain and make powerful life changes. 

Let’s chat about this article. Leave a comment below with the ways you’ve found that always make you happier.

Happiness can be relative to the health of our chakras. Here’s a popular explanation by our friend Doe Zantamata from Happiness in Your Life.

7 Steps to Happiness

The colors of the above image represent the colors of the chakras, the energy centers of the human body. They correspond to our glands, to CHI life energy, and to our lymphatic system.

The meaning behind each color. . .

Think Less, Feel More

White is the Crown Chakra, which is our connection to God and The Universe. This is especially helpful when everything around us seems wrong. We can still know inside that things will get better. This is why I made it, “Think Less, Feel More.” As long as we can go within, pray, meditate, we can still feel joy and connection, even when nothing else around us in the physical world seems to support it.

Frown Less, Smile More

Purple is the Third Eye Chakra, which is similar to the crown except it’s a connection to others. It’s the place of intuition. I have it as “Frown Less, Smile More,” because if we are smiling, the world smiles back. If we think positively, we’ll be open to more positivity around us. One of the Laws of Karma says that if we believe something is true, the Universe will have no choice but to keep showing us that truth. That’s why it’s so important to keep smiling!

Talk Less, Listen More

Blue is the Throat Chakra, which is communication. Communication isn’t just talking. If you train yourself to listen, really listen, you will be able to communicate much better, which is why I made that one “Talk Less, Listen More.”

Judge Less, Accept More

Green is the heart, which is unconditional love to self and others, which is why it’s “Judge Less, Accept More”…you cannot love if you are judging, and you can accept when you love.

Watch Less, Do More

Yellow is the Solar Plexus chakra, which is one of action. Whenever you get nervous and you get that tightening in the chest below the ribs, that’s the solar plexus. In society today, we often watch..watch movies, watch tv, watch sports. We get in the habit of watching but not doing as much. Then this habit can also lead to a less “action” motivated response in us, so when we really want something or really don’t want something, we risk becoming more prone to just dealing with it and not taking the action(s) to change it. So this is “Watch Less, Do More.”

Complain Less, Appreciate More

Orange is the Sacral Chakra, which is the one of relationships. Just imagine how much better our relationships would be if we all thought daily to “Complain Less, Appreciate More?” 🙂

Fear Less, Love More

Red is the Root Chakra, which is the survival center. When we build our life on fears, we will have more and more fears. When we build our life on love, we will have more and more love…and ultimately, happiness. This is why it is “Fear Less, Love More.”

This image is also available as an inspiration refrigerator magnet for a daily reminder.

The path to authentically becoming happy involves clearing the blocks to the happiness already waiting within us–we were never meant to search for things on the outside because our wellspring was waiting inside. We don’t have to fix anything or make ourselves better–we just have to brush off the dust that’s clouding and dulling our shine.

Taking spiritual teachings from the esoteric realm, or intellectual level into an experiential level was the catalyst for my personal shift from suffering to happiness. We do this through making a commitment to ourselves and creating a daily practice in which we connect with our higher self in meditation and then throughout the day so that we are able to consciously observe our life by being “up above it” rather than “stuck within it”.

From this higher perspective, observe your thoughts, beliefs, emotions, actions, and patterns so that you can begin to see clearly what changes you need to make in order to clear the blocks to your happiness within.

5 Things to Release in Order to be Happy

1. Thoughts

We begin by identifying the spiritual ego which is synonymous with fear–this means all thoughts that are not love can be released. Loving perceptions feel expansive, inspired and free. Fearful perceptions feel tight, stuck and doubt, judgment and lack are at the forefront. Choose love over fear to truly be happy.

2. Beliefs

A belief is simply a thought that has come in over and over until it has formed into a belief. What we believe in, we create. Are you believing in a nightmare or a happy dream? Identify limiting beliefs and commit to releasing them moment-to-moment.

3. Emotion

Feeling is healing–as we allow emotions to surface and release, we clear emotional patterns from our bodies that were energetically blocking us from happiness and abundance.  Energy is always trying to flow to us in the form of new relationships, creative and financial opportunities, and even better health. However, it’s up to us to open the pathways to be happy.

4. Actions

The actions we take directly affect our well-being.  When we pay attention to those which lower or drain our energy, we can let them go; even if it might not make sense on a logical level, it’s important to listen to our inner guide and body because it knows best.

5. Patterns

Unconscious activities or behaviors are operating from the place of the ego, not our inner guide, which requires us to be present and conscious to align with it. Create awareness of the behaviors that create self-sabotage and cause you suffering, and have the willingness to let them go. This will allow them to fall away naturally. Thus, you can free yourself to become happy.

My clients begin working with me because they know there’s more and they’re ready to get to the next level. Create a life you love from the inside out and download your *free* copy of The Happiness Blueprint.