Inspiration to your inbox

6 Relationship Skills Couples Often Forget

When a couple settles into a relationship, the spark can diminish and make the relationship a little monotonous. The impressing and chasing, or “courting” period is definitely very spunky and fun, but after getting into a relationship, couples can lose that hypnotic attention.  It gets replaced by contentment and a sense of security. Couples who were earlier spontaneous in displaying their love get channeled into a fixed routine. Tensions and problems arise frequently. Impressing your beloved and getting into a relationship is much easier than making your relationship work.

Making a relationship work requires patience, commitment, and the intense desire to stick together, come whatever may.  These 6 simple reminders can keep the spark alive in your relationship to make it harmonious.

“Being someone’s first love is great, but to be their last is beyond perfect.”

6 Relationship Skills Couples Often Forget:

1. Communication is the core of a happy relationship.

A couple may be deeply loving, but reading the mind of each other isn’t always possible for everyone. Therefore, it’s essential to express your thoughts, ideas, doubts, and problems with your partner. You should also share your negative thoughts and emotions with your partner.

If you’re having problems, or are bothered by something/someone, it’s important to share with your significant other.  You might not be willing to bother your partner with this, but keeping it bottled within you can harm the relationship.

Over the stretch of time, if the problem doesn’t get solved, you may even get frustrated and escalate into anger outbursts.  Therefore, communication is fundamental whenever either of the people in the relationship is bothered by something.

Miscommunications can be lethal in a relationship. If you misunderstand what your partner wanted to say, talk with them about it and be willing to listen openly. If you feel hurt by your partner’s gesture, tell them calmly that you felt hurt. If you keep quiet and assume things, arguments can sprout, souring the relationship.  You may feel that you know your partner very well but also remember that people grow and change with time. So be calm and communicate with your partner openly and often.

relationship skills

2. Don’t be afraid to admit mistakes.

This is extremely important to maintain harmony in your relationship. It can be difficult for some people to accept that they are wrong and their partner is right. However, inculcating this habit can keep your relationship unharmed by ego. If you realize that it was your mistake or you have been wrong with some information, accept it gently. When you admit that you are wrong, you are more likely to gain your partner’s respect.

Similarly when you’re discussing something and find that your partner is right, acknowledge it. It will increase your partner’s self-esteem. Being egoistic and always sticking to the belief that you are right will make you appear as an immature and arrogant person in your partner’s eyes.

3. Stay grateful.

“Taking for granted” has been the root cause of plenty of broken relationships. When you are in a relationship, you cannot take things too easy. You have to work on the relationship and nourish it every day.

Manage time for your partner, surprise him or her with little gestures and gifts, recollect memories together and tell your partner how much you love him or her. Making your partner feel loved and appreciated will keep your relationship always healthy.

4. Give your partner a little space.

Spending lots of time together is wonderful but you should also give your partner a little space if they require a little freedom. Some “alone time” is necessary for introspection, contemplation, growth, and realization.

A little absence will also give you time to miss each other and make your hearts grow more affectionate towards each other.

5. Provide unconditional acceptance.

When you are in a relationship, you will get to discover a lot of new things about your partner. Some of your partner’s quirks or habits may annoy you but you must provide unconditional acceptance to your partner. Do not try to change your partner or keep unrealistic expectations from them. Love your partner for the person they are.

6. Trust your partner.

Without trust, no relationship can ever survive. Trust your partner and don’t let silly, insignificant things make you suspect them. If you had a bad past and have been betrayed, then it will be tough for you to trust your partner. So, whenever you find yourself enveloped with doubts and insecurities, refer to tip #1 – talk to your partner about it. Do not assume things and let suspicion spoil your relationship.

 

If couples keep these 6 relationship tips in mind, their relationship will stay unaffected by misunderstandings, ego, and insecurities. Every healthy relationship faces some difficult moments but if you follow these tips, you can overcome those problems. Do not look for flaws in your relationship; rather try to work on them. When things go a little off the track, remember the time when you fell in love with your partner. That will make you realize the value of your partner and your relationship.

 

What do you do to maintain a positive relationship?  Share on Facebook or in the discussion below!

10 Ways Positive Thinking Improves Your Health

We’ve all heard the sayings about the power of positive thinking. But what many of us haven’t heard of is the power that those positive thoughts can have on our physical health and social environment. If more of us were aware of the benefits from a simple state of mind, imagine what a world we could live in. Change your mind, change your life.

Here 10 ways positive thinking can improve your health.

Positive thinking can improve physical health:

1. Positive thinking can improve the immune system.

With recent events worldwide, current medical research has focused on ways the immune system functions and can be improved. In a similar effect, psychological studies show that people recover from illnesses such as flu and colds faster and are less symptomatic than compared with people who have a more negative thought process.

2. Positive thinking can decrease blood pressure.

By having more positive thinking, stress becomes less of a factor in your life. As a result, all of those negative side effects from stress also become irrelevant. Heart disease, high blood pressure, and other heart-related effects will become less significant if not eliminated completely. It’s not just a state of mind, but positive thinking can literally save your life.

3. Positive thinking can increase resilience.

People who have positive thoughts also have better coping skills. As a result, they are better at healing after a medical setback. Not only is the immune system improved as mentioned, but healing after surgical procedures, fractures, and other acute injuries have been shown to be faster than negative counterparts.

4. Positive thinking contributes to longevity.

On average, people with the power of positive thinking average a lifespan of 10 years longer than those with negative thoughts. This is due to a culmination of all of these physical benefits that allow you to enjoy improved health and physical function longer into your golden years.

5. Positive thinking can increase pain tolerance.

Nobody wants to have to tolerate pain, but there are times where you might not have a choice. Let’s say you overdo it on that new workout fad and you wake up barely able to move. With positive thinking, your mindset reduces the focus on pain and discomfort.

 

Positive thinking can improve social health:

Social perception of people is so important in today’s world of social media where “image is everything”. If you are perceived as positive, society will place a higher value and level of respect on your decisions, opinions, and overall level of interaction. Whether you are working in a corporation or business for sales or you are an individual striving to make your mark on the world, here’s how positive thinking can help you do that:

6. Positive thinking contributes to leadership skills.

People who have more positive thoughts are more likely to be hired for jobs in a leadership position. Similarly, people with more positive thoughts are more likely to be promoted to a leadership position. Studies show that positive people are more likely to be followed by employees. Another example is that salespeople who are positive have more sales than those who are perceived as negative.

7. Positive thinkers enjoy life more.

People who have more positive thoughts have an overall better love for life. They are often more socially outgoing, interacting with people and their community, and enjoying their environment and surroundings to the fullest.

8. Positive thinking increases self-esteem.

Self-esteem is a natural by-product of positive thinking. If you think positively, then you will have more confidence in yourself and in the situation you are in. And, again, people are attracted to people with a healthy dose of self-esteem. Just make sure to keep your self-esteem in check before it turns into arrogance and you lose those people you lead.

9. Positive thinking helps create healthier relationships.

Relationships are perhaps the most difficult thing in life for many people to master. But studies show that people with a positive outlook not only find their perfect partner but stay married longer. You can also put those interpersonal skills to good use in the workplace by forging positive relationships with coworkers and potential clients.

10. Positive thinking produces better habits.

With positive thinking comes more social awareness and better-coping skills. People make better decisions with such things as drinking, exercising, and eating better. They are more socially aware of their actions and how they are perceived. They are less likely to give in to social pressures that aren’t good for them. Their decision-making skills are more detailed and objective and geared to a better overall outcome for everyone involved.

The social and physical aspects begin to intertwine as well.  As you have more social opportunities and develop more relationships, you tend to celebrate life a little more. Your stress goes down as more and more positive things happen for you. Your overall health is now increased and you feel better than ever. And when something happens that affects your health, you are now able to cope and heal faster than before.  Above all, the positive thinking lifestyle takes effort but is an effort well worth it.

How have you used the power of positivity to change your life?  Share with others in the discussion below!

This One Minute Video Will Give You Instant Peace & Serenity [Positive Affirmation VIDEO]

Every word we speak is affirming our perspective of ourselves, others or the world around us. Essentially, we are using affirmations every day, sometimes without consciously realizing it. At times, our affirmations are not the most accurate or positive affirmations.

Consciously using affirmations can help us flip the switch and begin speaking in the direction that we actually want to travel – reversing the unconscious self-sabotage that holds us from our goals and dreams.

“An affirmation opens the door. It’s a beginning point on the path to change.” – Louise L. Hay

We have found that visual inspiration is always the best and most effective. So, we created a video with some of our favorite affirmations to bring you instant peace and serenity. It’s only a minute, too.

Without further ado, enjoy this little dose of instant awesomeness! 🙂

Positive Affirmations for Abundance:

Here are more Positive Affirmations for Abundance:

My good comes to me from every direction. I am open to receive!

I am in tune with the smooth, beautiful rhythm of the Universe. Abundance is lining up for me in EVERY area of my life!

I feel truly grateful for the abundance that surrounds me!

I remain grateful for the victories already on the way.

Focusing on my individual self will bring the outward results I am looking for.

I thrive and flourish in an environment that expands my current boundaries. My potential is truly limitless!

My thoughts and spirit are wealthy as can be. I am using my Power of Positivity!

Wealth is a mindset. I allow it to flow freely into my life and abundantly enrich multiple avenues.

Feeling and expressing gratitude in any situation allows me to change my focus to the good things in life.

I love my career and earn a good income.

Love is abundant in my life.

I open the doors to receive more right now.

I am self-sufficient! And, I am equipped with everything I need to THRIVE!!!

Life is sooo good to me!

How I feel matters, therefore I concentrate on aspects of life that make me feel good!

Positive affirmations will always be the main ingredient to attracting more health and abundance into your life.

We have a collection of affirmation articles on our site to help you expand your awareness and transform your life, just like we did.

Every day is a day to Shine. SHINE ON!positive-affirmations

 

3 Ways to Handle Disturbingly Negative Thoughts

The human psyche has so many funky glitches that it’s a wonder we can all get along. Actually, on the whole, we have a very, very difficult time getting along, aren’t we?

This is why positive thinking resources are so necessary. They help us remain on the positive side of the mental equation. Still, what do we do when negative thoughts creep in?

Well, negativity begins in the mind, so let’s start with how it manifests and then discuss steps to take that will neutralize it.

Negativity can spontaneously manifest – and it often does so in a disturbing way. You may be sitting at lunch with a friend. Suddenly, a thought pops into your head: He’s so stupid. And look, his socks don’t even match.  You may be meeting with your boss or another authority figure. Suddenly, you feel the urge to go off, ranting about what a horrible supervisor he or she is.  You may even be cuddling with your romantic partner and begin to have doubtful, negative, and unfounded thoughts about his or her intentions.

Negativity can have a life of its own within our psyche, and we often feel helpless to do anything about it.  The question is – what can you do to manage the negative aspects of your mind effectively?

Here are three ways to handle disturbingly negative thoughts:

thoughts meme

 1. Realize that impulsive, critical, and even blatantly hostile is normal.

These thoughts are not “socially acceptable,” so few people want to admit what’s going on in their heads. Nevertheless, your average person’s mind can be a steaming cauldron of mischief.  I know this from 25 years of counseling and coaching very average people like me. My clients have always been well-adjusted, successful people with families, jobs, business ventures and adult responsibilities. Normal people.  Yet, when we dig around just a bit, even the nicest, most reserved people reveal a totally different and much darker version of themselves.

This is normal, normal, normal. I’ve never met anyone – anyone – from the average marijuana-smoking teenager to the most distinguished professional who wasn’t struggling on a deeper level with this stuff.

I remember when I first realized that my mind was ready to go off on people. I was standing in the office of the Mission President in Sao Paulo, Brazil. (At the time, I was a Mormon missionary from 19-21 and a devout Mormon until age 37).   Through hard work and dedication, I had risen through the ranks and landed a position as a special assistant to the president. This job was the envy of all power-hungry missionaries. Anyway, there we stood. The president was going on about necessary changes in the field and I was nodding along gravely.

I support you, Mr. President!

And then it hit me – the sudden urge to punch him in the face. I noticed my hand clenching and….Whoa! Hold on a second. Don’t punch your spiritual leader!

Then the voice, “Screw it. I’m going to lay this guy out right now!”

I said a silent prayer. I’m so sorry for my violent thoughts. Please give me the strength to respect my leader…

“Punch him! Punch that sucker!”

For six months I worked in the office of the president. And for six months I wanted to haul off and sock that guy in the face for no apparent reason (there was a reason – just not one I was aware of at the time). It was agonizing.

Ok? I’m a person, too. And this is all pretty normal from my perspective. If you are aware enough to notice your disturbing thoughts, congratulations. You are not alone. You’re in the company of every other human being who has ever existed. Trust me.

2. Thoughts are only thoughts; that is all they will ever be.

A thought is a tiny secretion of neurotransmitters. They happen to the tune of thousands per hour according to some estimates (actually, they can’t really be quantified since the brain never rests and is constantly processing an enormous amount of data). Some of this data rises to the surface where we give it conscious consideration and meaning.

Isn’t it interesting that we often give the negative stuff all the weight and dismiss the positive? These are your negative psychological attachments at work. Negative attachments are what keep us glued to inner angst. They’re powerful. I dedicated a book to this concept of clinging to inner negativity. It’s real – and everyone should be aware, as difficult as it is to admit.

Anyway, thoughts are just thoughts. They are neither good nor bad. They only have the significance that you give them. Can you stop taking them so seriously? If you can, then you’ll have more choices.

 3. There is a solution.

It’s not a magical solution. No one can wave a magic wand that will clean up your mind, turning you into pure, golden light. You’re a person; imperfect and vulnerable.

That said, if you are willing to address the deeper issues, you can achieve a purer, more relaxed mind a lot more often. In my experience, you won’t get there by battling each thought. This only sets you up for war within yourself.

You get there by dealing with your deeper issues.

For me, the deeper issue was one of resistance to authority. Growing up, those in authority over me consistently hurt or neglected me. At length, I came to the conclusion that they didn’t care or didn’t know what they were doing – and therefore, no authority figure ought to have any power over me. In fact, I guess I thought authority figures needed to be punished.

These are childish thoughts from a hurt child who didn’t understand that my parents and older siblings were just people struggling with their own issues. In my child mind, I didn’t care. I just wanted revenge.  This leads to problems throughout early adulthood. My rebel attitude only invited more intervention from authority – not less -which made me resent them all the more….vicious cycle.  The Rebel is one of the 12 attachment types that cause self-sabotage per the AHA Solution online program. I had to work through this one for quite some time. It was worth it.

Most of all, working on the deeper issues has allowed me the luxury of a quiet mind that rarely spins out of control. My mind does still get the best of me from time to time, but nothing like before. More than worth all the effort!

thoughts

Final Thoughts on Managing Your Darkest Thoughts

What’s the deeper issue beneath your negative thoughts?

Identify it. Name the issue and square yourself with the truth. Then, you’ll have your work cut out for you. It’s doable. And a much better path than remaining at the mercy of your mental demons.

10 Ways to Help Kids Think Positive

Helping kids understand the effect of their thoughts, words, actions (and reactions) is essential in building a foundation for their future wellness. When kids learn how to think positive from a young age, they will have a much greater chance of leading happy, healthy, and successful lives as adults.

There are many effective ways to help guide children down a great path in life, but it’s up to us, the adults in their lives to get them started in the best direction possible. Here are some fantastic parenting tips to help you to that end.

Here are 10 ways to help your kids think positive:

1. Be a great role model.

“Children are like wet cement. Whatever falls on them makes an impression.” – Haim Ginott

If you want children to think positive, it’s important to be an exemplary role model. When you have a child, being conscious of your thoughts becomes a clear goal as you see them begin to mimic your moods, speech, and actions toward others.

Find a positive perspective in your experiences, and explain why the choice you made is important. Adults know that the world isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, but children can forget this awareness at their age. Be someone they can learn from through both success and failure.

2. Help them feel comfortable with their emotions.

The aged assumption that “boys should not cry, and girls should always be dainty” can hinder a child’s creativity and ability to tap into their wellspring of love for themselves and others. Fostering emotional well-being among children has actually been shown to avoid “mental illness” later in life, along with many other health and social benefits.

Teach your child how to laugh, cry, and express their joy, and that it’s ok to do so. Let them live in an environment where they feel safe enough to communicate what they’re feeling, and what they want in life.

3. Teach them the law of attraction.

The law of attraction simply states that you will eventually receive the opportunity, in some form, to achieve that which is in alignment with your most dominant thoughts. If children understand this concept, they can learn to focus on achieving everything from potty training to becoming President.   Teach your children to think well of themselves, as they are now. Teach them to be kind and compassionate toward others. This simple 3 step process to the law of attraction will help you explain it to them simply.

Also, have your child repeat positive affirmations in the mirror with you every day. Phrases like “I am creative, I am strong, I am a good friend, and I make a difference in the world” plants the seeds of positivity in their hearts, and impacts their lives in a tremendous way.

Nothing can stop your child from achieving greatness when they make positive thinking their habit. Watch young Jessica as she expresses her inner confidence in this Youtube video:

 

4. Be a motivator and encourager.

Help your child believe that they can be their best. Encourage them to follow their dreams and to believe that they can achieve great things in life.

Even if your child fails at something, motivate them to pick themselves up and carry on – teach them that in every outcome, there is always a silver lining. If your child was expecting to win first place at the science fair but didn’t, acknowledge their feelings. Talk about the cool projects, and how they can be inspired for their next project. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is say that you tried your best, look forward, and that another opportunity will be on the way.

5. Teach them how to focus on solutions.

Followers talk about problems. Leaders talk about solutions.

Problem-solving is a critical skill that all kids need to gain confidence, continue thinking positive, and excel in life. Help them learn about the problem and what created it, then how to move past it and focus on a solution.

Moving into the “solution zone” as quickly as possible will encourage them to always think positive, and be confident that answers are always out there.

6. Allow them the freedom to do what they love.

To flourish in their own unique way, children need some freedom to do what they love. Guide children to safely find their purpose and passion. Create a learning environment from what excites them in life. Everything has a lesson, and it’s up to us to provide that lesson in the most engaging way to maximize a child’s learning.

7. Surround them with positive people.

Surround children with a positive, uplifting environment. Explain to them that they are a product of the people they spend the most time with, and to try to associate with other people who also think positive. From this fertile positive environment, they can move forward in helping others think positive as well.

8. Encourage strong morals and values.

Children can grow up to be strong, positive leaders if cornerstone positive morals and values are built from a young age. Knowing what’s “right and wrong” when interacting with friends, holding them accountable for their mistakes, and teaching them to follow through with commitments are all core principles of practicing positivity.

To help them understand easily, talk about your own life experiences such as returning someone’s wallet or intentionally making friends with the new kid at school to welcome them.

9. Ask them about the positive events of their day.

Instead of just asking how their day went, ask them about the positive things that happened during their day. These specific questions help them focus on their achievements rather than disappointments.

When children stay focused on thinking positive, their positive experiences will only continue to grow.

10. Create a literacy-rich environment.

Support literacy starting from an early age. It takes them to places they can embrace their own powers. A child that often reads is enriched with the power to strategize and solve problems. Give them library cards, provide puzzles, read a variety of books, play bingo, scrabble, and introduce books on the computer.  There are even programs like Reading Kingdom that allows them to play online as they learn to read.

 

Your turn: Share your tips to help kids think positive in the discussion below!

5 Ways to Think Outside the Box

To think outside the box means to think creatively, free from any constraints of societal or “accepted” norms.  It’s become almost cliche in society, but is so much more than that.  Throughout history, “radical” ideas from outside the box have changed the way people learn, form ideas, and construct civilization as a whole.  But why is such a common phrase today put into practice so little?  

With an expanded positive thinking mindset, it becomes very possible avoid the cyclical ills of society that cause problem after problem.  Solutions are often waiting for you to simply peel back the curtain of your current awareness.

Here are 5 Ways to Help You Think Outside the Box:

1. Release limiting beliefs

The first thing you’ve got to be willing to do to regularly think outside the box is realizing what’s holding you in it in the first place and why you’re in it.

Society has molded a “structure” that people are expected to follow.  In many cases, people pursue academia, followed by a career to work your way to the top…  But when you realize that many of the world’s biggest successes never made it out of high school, following a traditional path may seem fruitless.  Don’t be afraid to blaze your own path to creating a positive and prosperous lifestyle.

Anyone can release limiting beliefs.  You’ve probably done so and don’t even realize it.  Just ask yourself “are there beliefs I’ve held 5 years ago that I do not hold today?”.  That question alone shows you the possibility to release limiting beliefs think outside the box

2. Practice responsibility

Thinking outside the box is like exploring uncharted territory.  You’re opening yourself up to new perspectives, beliefs, and paradigms.  The potential energy that awaits you outside the box is limitless and must be handled with responsibility.

As new people and possibilities enter your realm, maintaining a level head will help you stay focused on what you want.  The possibility of losing your vision for stepping outside the box altogether is there — if you allow it to be.  No matter how far in or out of the box you may be, your actions still create your future.  Create responsibly.

3. Release judgment

Once you’re opened up to new ways of thinking, you may come to a new level of understanding a person’s power of choice.  So long as it’s not destructive or hurtful toward anyone, a positive practice is to release judgment and understand that we all have an equal amount of power to create in this world.

Releasing judgment will not only make room for more abundance in your own life but may also even restore a little bit of your faith in humanity!

4. Remember how small you really are.

Many people are thinking inside the box (and sometimes a very small one) without even realizing it.  They think that this space is all there is, with nothing behind the walls of their current reality.

Your life is a perfectly unique piece of the entire cosmos but is only that – a piece.  Stepping outside and away from “you” for a moment opens up a whole new perspective on how small you really are, and how big the world around you really is.  Like sand, a beach is not formed from a single grain, but each grain still plays an equal part in creating the beach.

5. Be confident

Make no doubt, many thought leaders have paid the price for thinking outside the box.  But those people knew the positive effect their discoveries would make and showed resolve to prove a new truth to the world.  If you’re ever afraid of what “the box people” think of the new ideas you’re bringing to the table, remember that if they don’t accept it – it may be because your idea is too big for the box itself.

As you continue to think outside the box, you’ll find yourself asking new questions. Dare to continue asking and seeking answers – be an agent of progress. The “rabbit hole” you’re traveling down goes as far as you want it to.  Could you be thinking outside one box, then realize that you’re only in another?  Life is limited only by the limitations you set on it.

 

Take this article outside the box – In what ways have you discovered newness in your life?  What new ways of thought, speech, action, and reaction have you discovered?  How have they changed your life overall?

Skip to content