Speaking To Yourself With Respect

November 16, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Viewing things negatively and feeling like you can’t handle challenges could indicate a lack of self-respect. Without self-respect, your work performance could suffer, and you’ll be afraid to take on new opportunities. Affirmational statements could help you increase self-respect and allow you to experience a fulfilling life full of experiences.

Self-respect affects how you handle life experiences. Everyone experiences bad days and weeks, and it can take a toll on your self-esteem. Using daily affirmations can help you turn things around and regain self-respect.

Affirming statements can help you embrace who you are and rediscover self-love. As you become confident in who you are, your self-respect will increase, too. Your work life isn’t the only part that will increase either, as it’ll also promote a calmer mind.

You won’t experience as many negative thoughts when you feel good about yourself. You won’t spend as much time thinking about what you did or said earlier. If you struggle with these things and want to improve your self-respect, these affirmational statements are for you.

Twenty Affirmational Statements to Increase Self-Respect

You can say these affirmational statements any time, but they’re best in the morning as you get ready. Look in the mirror and smile as you say the phrases; your mind will process them as the truth. It helps you gain self-respect that lasts throughout the day.

1. I am making progress toward my goals each day.

By reminding yourself that you’re making progress toward your goals, you’ll feel better about what you’ve done. It helps you identify your daily accomplishments, allowing you to see how great you are. This affirmation not only makes you feel better but also encourages you to make more progress.

2. I take care of myself and prioritize my health.

One of the best ways to boost your self-respect is to take care of yourself. Your mental and physical health are both essential to your well-being. If you want to feel good about who you are, start prioritizing yourself and your health.

3. I accept myself for who I am right now.

Accepting yourself as you are in this moment is essential to having self-respect. You can strive to become a better version of yourself while still recognizing the importance of respect. It will help you accept your flaws, mistakes, and anything else you’ve struggled with.

The more often you use this affirmational statement, the more your positive feelings increase. No one is perfect, but you can respect and love yourself anyway.

4. I am contributing to the world around me every day.

You might sometimes feel like you don’t contribute to society, but you always do. Whether you smile at a stranger, hold the door for someone, or do any other act of kindness, you’re contributing.

There are many other ways you contribute that you don’t always think about too. Jobs contribute to the world around you, and raising kind children does. Think outside the box and consider how you bring good to the world as you say this affirmation.

5. I deserve kindness and compassion, so I treat myself with respect.

Reaffirm that you deserve kindness and compassion and will be more likely to show it to yourself. It’s easy to forget that you deserve good things, too, so a daily reminder can make all the difference.

Being kind to yourself can quickly boost your sense of self-respect and remind you of your self-worth. This affirmation will help you feel better throughout the day. Indeed, this affirmational statement will grant yourself grace and compassion.

6. I am happy with who I am and embrace my unique qualities.

Everyone is different, and it’s nothing to be ashamed about. Instead, embrace your unique qualities because they are what set you apart from everyone else. You don’t have to be like everyone else to be happy with who you are, so use this affirmation as your reminder.

7. I stand up for myself and don’t allow people to mistreat me.

Standing up for yourself is one of the best ways to boost self-respect. You don’t have to be unkind to stand up for yourself; you’ll get your point across better if you’re nice. It will leave you feeling empowered and confident when speaking up.

8. I have everything I need in my life right now.

You might not have everything you want now, but you have what you need to survive and grow. Acknowledging that your needs are met daily can help you feel better overall. Then, you’ll experience more self-respect than when you thought you lacked something.

9. I am strong enough to handle anything that comes my way.

You are strong, powerful, and brave. Use this affirmation to remind yourself of that fact each day. You can handle anything that you encounter along your journey. By reminding yourself that no obstacle or hardship can stop you, you’ll quickly experience more self-respect and confidence.

10. I appreciate the supportive people in my life.

When you have people who love and support you, it can help boost your self-respect. The people who care about you treat you kindly; this affirmation is a helpful reminder. You’ll start to treat yourself the way your loved ones do, and it’ll quickly make you feel better.

11. I can do anything and know how to improve my life.

There’s nothing you can’t do when you set your mind to it. Remember that you have everything it takes to improve your life, so go with your gut moving forward. You’ll feel better about your life decisions and respect yourself more.

12. I am valuable to the world around me, and people appreciate what I do.

Don’t allow yourself to believe that you aren’t valuable to the world around you. You are valuable, and people appreciate you. This affirmational statement is perfect for you if you ever struggle with identifying your self-worth.

13. I surround myself with people who are kind and supportive.

If you have negative thoughts when you spend time around certain people, it might be time to reprioritize. Spending time with negative people who aren’t kind can affect your self-respect. Prioritize your friends and loved ones who support you and don’t make you feel bad about yourself.

14. I am capable of anything I want or need to do.

You can do anything if you dedicate yourself to it, and if you think you can’t, it’s likely because you lack self-respect. Anytime you tell yourself that you can’t do something, it indicates that you don’t believe in yourself.

15. I am making changes to live the life I want to live.

If you ever question yourself and wonder if you’re making the right choice, this affirmation is for you. Reassure yourself that you are doing what is necessary to improve your life. Besides that, this reminder will boost your self-respect and allow you to feel good about what you choose to do.

16. I treat myself with respect and kindness.

Telling yourself that you treat yourself well can make all the difference in your life. When you tell yourself something enough times, your mind processes it as the truth. So, repeat this daily affirmation to help boost your self-respect and feel better about life.

17. I love the person I am becoming.

Change is part of life, and even if you don’t realize it, you change a little daily. This affirmation will help you develop self-respect because you’ll love who you are. Life becomes much better when you see the good in yourself and embrace each step of your journey.

18. I appreciate the things I’m good at and use them to my advantage.

No one is good at everything, so don’t beat yourself up over your weaknesses. Instead, embrace the things you’re good at and see how you can use them to your advantage. Repeat this affirmation each morning to help you acknowledge and use your strengths.

19. I value how I spend my time.

When you value your time, it helps boost your self-respect. You only have so much time in one day, so respecting how you spend it allows you to take control of your life.

Don’t agree to things you don’t want to do, and don’t put other people’s needs before your own. You can’t get that time back, and letting people cut into your time that way can take a toll on your self-respect.

20. I deserve to prioritize happiness in my life.

Negative self-talk might lead you to believe that you don’t deserve happiness. However, good people deserve happiness and joy in their lives. Repeat this affirmational statement until you gain enough self-respect to embrace happiness.

Final Thoughts on Affirmational Statements to Increase Self-Respect

You can live a meaningful life that reflects the person you are when you respect yourself. So if you struggle with self-respect, these affirmational statements can make a difference in your mindset. Repeating them daily can help you build respect for yourself and prioritize your well-being.

Everyone experiences times when they don’t think they deserve respect, but you must overcome this feeling. Remember that you are valuable, and worthy. Indeed, you can do anything you set your mind to. These affirmational statements will help you remember, allowing you to increase your self-respect each day.

5 Signs Your Cat Is Actually Happy to See You

November 16, 2022 by Kristen Lawrence

If you own a cat, you’re probably familiar with the numerous ways they show affection. People often stereotype the feline as solitary, independent creatures, but they have so much love to give.

Dogs usually get more attention because of their reputation as humans’ best friends. However, new research shows that cats also deserve some recognition from humans. Because of their evolutionary traits, domestic cats have a more developed independent streak than dogs. The large felines that house cats evolved from preferred to hunt alone instead of in a pack. That’s why cats sometimes tend to wander off on their own. However, because we have domesticated them, they gradually learned to develop bonds with us as their caregivers.

Research shows cats don’t attach to people for security like dogs do. But cats still show appreciation for their owners in unique ways, especially if they’ve been socialized as kittens. Being exposed to humans during their second to the seventh week of life dramatically influences their social behaviors toward people.

You can probably tell quite easily if your kitty feels happy in your presence. Below, we’ll discuss a few behaviors they may display to show their love and affection.

5 Signs Your Cat Feels Happy Around You

1. You cat might rub their head against you.

Cats use their sense of smell to understand the world around them. They also rely on scent to bond with their human or cat family and identify members of their pack. Cats possess scent glands on their cheeks and head and frequently rub against the people closest to them. If your cat rubs or headbutts you, take it as a sign they feel comfortable and happy. It means they consider you a friend and one of their own, a surefire sign of a pet’s loyalty!

2. An attached feline will greet you by exposing its belly or sticking its tail straight up.

To discover if your feline feels happy around you, watch how they move their tail. A kitty holding its tail upright means it feels social and confident. It’s a friendly greeting that means they missed you and want to play or cuddle!

They might also hold their tail in a question mark or hook shape, indicating they want to interact. Finally, your feline may wrap its tail around your leg, the ultimate sign of trust and friendship.

Cats may also roll over and expose their bellies to people they feel comfortable around. Don’t take it lightly if you see your feline in this vulnerable position. It means you make them feel relaxed and protected, but it doesn’t necessarily signal they want a belly rub. Cats usually prefer being petted on their face or neck and may lash out if you try to pet their tummy.

You can also listen to the noises you make to see if your cat feels happy. If your cat gently purrs or meows quietly at you, it means they feel content in your company.

3. Your cat blinks slowly at you.

Many felines show love through their eyes, much like humans do. If you’ve ever watched stray cats in your neighborhood, you may notice they stare at you intently. However, when a cat feels comfortable around you, it will slowly blink as a sign of love and security.

Researchers have found that a cat slowly blinking indicates a positive mood and shows they trust you. You can even blink back at your feline to develop a deeper bond with them! Kittens form relationships with one another in this manner, so humans can also benefit from the gesture.

4. A loving feline enjoys cuddling and gently kneading you.

As you might have noticed, felines are highly territorial creatures and don’t like people disrupting their alone time. They also tend to have a favorite person and shy away from strangers or other family members. So, if a cat allows you to enter its personal space, take it as a compliment. Cuddling with you on the couch or lying on your lap also indicates a high level of trust.

If you’ve ever noticed your cat kneading its paws against you, this also shows they feel happy. Kittens perform this behavior while they nurse because it provides comfort and releases endorphins.

So if they knead you with their front paws, it indicates they feel relaxed and content. They may knead you while you pet or cuddle them to return the affection you’re offering. While this behavior might soothe your cat, it may cause significant discomfort if they have sharp claws. You can always place a blanket between you to form a barrier if it becomes too painful.

5. Your cat likes to sleep nearby.

Cats love keeping their owners in sight, especially if they have a deep attachment. You might notice your feline following you around the house or outside if they feel happy around you. Also, your feline friend might curl up next to you at bedtime. This behavior means they trust that you will safeguard them from danger, and they will return the favor.

People typically think of dogs as being protective of their owners, but cats also display this behavior in their own way. They may not look intimidating, but they won’t hesitate to hiss or chase away an intruder.

Final Thoughts on Signs of Happiness in Cats

Cats show contentment and affection in various ways, such as cuddling or kneading you on the couch. They follow their owners around the house and even jump in bed with them. In addition, felines enjoy greeting humans by curling their tails around your legs or rolling over on their backs. Slowly blinking at you or softly purring indicates a happy, relaxed cat.

We don’t usually consider felines warmhearted, tender animals, but they sometimes show their softer side. If you have a loving, close relationship with your kitty, they will show you affection whenever possible. How can you tell that your cat feels safe and happy? Join the conversation on Facebook.

7 Considerations Before Making a Life Change

November 15, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Making a significant life change is something that requires planning and consideration. It can be scary, but it’s also an exciting time. Regardless of your age, life-changing adjustments must be well thought out.

Making a change can be the best thing you ever do, but it isn’t something you should do on a whim. As you grow into the best version of yourself, you’ll want to explore all life offers. Whether it’s a new career, a cross-country move, or any other significant change, it’s a big deal, and you shouldn’t take it lightly.

Think about the benefits and consequences before making any decisions either way. You might decide to keep things as they are now, or you’ll go ahead with the change. Either way, there will be pros and cons involved, so make sure you consider both situations.

Seven Essential Considerations Before Making a Significant Life Change

These essential considerations will help you decide if you should make a life change or stick to what you’ve got right now. You won’t know which option is best until you think everything through, and it all depends on your situation. Work your way through the considerations, keep an open mind, and be honest with yourself.

1. Can You Achieve the Goal?

Ask yourself if you can achieve the goal associated with your life change. If you doubt yourself even a little bit, you likely won’t make it. Your thoughts guide your life, so you must be confident that you can achieve the goal before changing.

Pay attention to how you talk about the situation, too. Using words like “it would be nice…” implies that it isn’t possible. With that thought, you won’t be able to make that wish come true.

However, saying things like “it is nice” shows that you believe it is achievable. There’s no limit to what you can do with the right mindset, but you must believe in yourself first.

Believing in yourself isn’t the only thing to consider when deciding if you can achieve a goal. You also have to think about your talents and dedication. While passion is essential, you must also have the necessary skills and be ready to do the hard work.

You might love doing something but lack the talent to make it a career. While you can develop your skill set, you also must have something that sets you apart in the field. Everyone has different strengths, so consider yours when it comes to a change.

2. Can You Test the Process?

Before making a significant life change, you must determine if it’ll work long-term. Start with baby steps before you make drastic changes to see if you can sustain them. Each goal you achieve is a method of testing the process, no matter how small the step was.

When you build on the small steps you’ve achieved, it shows that the change can work. You’ll need dedication to keep going, but taking small steps shows you have what it takes. If you haven’t taken baby steps, you aren’t ready to test the process, so making a significant change would be detrimental.

You don’t want to make a change prematurely and then find it doesn’t work. It’s sometimes hard to go back once you’ve shifted your path, so test it out and ensure you can succeed.

3. Is the Change Familiar Yet Original?

A well-balanced mix of familiarity and originality is necessary to find success in your plan. Sticking with something familiar will help you feel safer in the process. You don’t want too much uncertainty, or you’ll experience overwhelming fears and anxiety.

However, you won’t grow much from the change if it isn’t original. You’ll need originality and unfamiliarity to help lead you in a new direction. You’ll know you’ve found a good balance when you experience surprises and delights.

Studies show that learning new knowledge is easier based on what you already know. A firm foundation to build your unique ideas is essential for successfully making a significant life change. The originality will stimulate your brain to grow, and the comfort of the familiar will give you confidence as you go forward.

4. Does the Life Change Align with Your Identity?

A significant change requires adapting a little, but you must stay true to who you are. It’s exciting to explore new possibilities that have nothing to do with your identity, but they can hinder your progress. This situation is another one where balance is essential.

Your changes should align with your identity but still allow you to grow. You’ll want to step out of your comfort zone while staying true to who you are. Staying true to yourself isn’t to say that you should pass over every drastically different opportunity, but you must consider how it’ll affect your life.

As you consider your identity, think about the people who love you now. While they want to see you do well and find happiness, they also want you to stay true to yourself. Consider how the change will affect those closest to you because your lives are intertwined.

5. Is It Worth the Cost and Effort?

A significant life change will result in both rewards and costs. Whether the price is tangible or emotional, you’ll want to consider whether the reward is worth it. If the prize doesn’t seem worth it at first, see if there’s a way you can make it all work out.

When you consider the reward compared to the cost ahead of time, you might be able to adjust. If finances are involved, you’ll want to ensure you can afford the change and sustain the long-term expenses. However, if you can’t afford it and continue living as you are now, you’ll either need to avoid the change or decrease your costs.

If you want to switch careers, you’ll have other aspects to consider, including health insurance. If your current employer offers an insurance plan, you’ll want to factor in the cost of paying out of pocket before switching jobs.

Additionally, you’ll want to consider the effects that a significant change can have on your family. If your change jeopardizes their healthcare, home, or overall well-being, it might not be a good idea.

6. Does the Life Change Align with Your Values?

You will never feel fulfilled if you don’t stick to your value system. It might look like you’re living a good life, but you will always feel like you’re falling short. To avoid feeling this way, consider whether the change aligns with your values.

However, it might be complicated to determine if the change aligns. The things you believe in aren’t always straightforward, so you’ll have to contemplate this question. Even if your values aren’t as socially accepted, you must follow them, or you’ll feel like an imposter.

Come up with a list of things you can’t accept. Then, make a list of the things you can’t live without. From there, brainstorm some of your deeper values that don’t immediately come to mind.

Before changing, take the time to delve within and consider every belief you have. You don’t want to be taken aback later on when you realize you aren’t comfortable with something.

7. What is Your Motivation?

You must figure out the reason for what you are doing before making a significant change. Think about what motivates you and why you’re doing what you’re doing—figuring out your “why” can help you make a change that will be meaningful and beneficial for your life.

If your “why” is to escape a situation that weighs heavily on you emotionally, then you can weigh the pros and cons. Plus, it’ll help you find a better position elsewhere because you won’t settle for another emotionally draining situation. In this instance, it might even be worth it to take a pay cut so you’ll be happier.

Once you’ve determined your motivation for wanting a change, you can see if it’s worthwhile. If you end up having the same experience either way, a significant difference might not be necessary. Remember that every situation has negatives.

Final Thoughts on Essential Considerations Before Making a Significant Life Change

Making a significant life change is exciting, but you must make sure it’s the right choice. You can use the above questions to consider whether to change or keep things as they are now.

Once you’ve answered these questions, you will have the necessary information to make the best choice for you and your family. Don’t resist change, but do your due diligence and think it through before taking drastic measures. Whatever you decide to do, make sure you’ll be happy and find success.

15 Ways To Grow Strong Again After a Loss

November 15, 2022 by Chris Butler

When you experience a tragic loss, psychological and emotional effects will stay with you indefinitely, but you can’t dwell on it forever. Each person grieves in their own way, and you can’t judge yourself based on someone else’s ability to get over things quickly. There’s no right or wrong way to handle a tragedy, but there are some things that you can do to keep your mental health.

Once you get through the initial shock of the situation, you have a lot of work to heal and strengthen your mental health after a loss. You might be dealing with losing a home from a natural disaster, the death of a pet or a loved one or going through some stress over losing a job. Whatever the situation is that brought you to your breaking point, you must realize that you need positive actions to counter all the negativity of the situation.

The good news is that the despair won’t last forever. Humans are resilient, and you will learn to cope. Time does have a way of easing things, but it won’t erase all the pain. When all is said and done, you can emerge an even stronger person.

Some find that the pain lingers longer than others, but this is where you might have some unchecked grief that must be addressed. Loss can quickly become a mental health concern when a person is in the depths of despair and can’t find a way out.

Fifteen Ways to Help Your Mental Health After a Tragic Loss

When you first experience loss, you don’t know how to turn or what to do. However, it would help you find ways to renew and keep going. You have a family, friends, and a job that depends on you. Here are some ways to help ease the pain and become even stronger on the other side of grief.

1. Know That It’s Okay to Hurt and Cry After a Loss

You’ve been through a horrific ordeal, and the worst thing you can do is suppress these emotions. You must let them out and allow your tears to flow. Crying is healing as it gets all these emotions from the inside to the out.

People who don’t process their anguish are the ones that have major issues down the road. Counselors often advise that if you don’t handle the emotions and channel your grief proactively, you can slip into acute depression.

2. Acknowledge Your Painful Loss

It hurts when you lose someone you love through a tragic loss. Even strong people realize this kind of incident is more than they can handle. It’s okay to acknowledge that it hurts, and you don’t have to pretend everything is back to normal after the services.

It’s okay for you not to be okay, and you must acknowledge the pain you feel to handle and process it.

3. Remember the Good Times

Memories are something that no one can take from you. Whether you knew this person for a few years or a lifetime, you have a database full of reminiscences.

Laugh about the funny things they did and recall the love they showed to others that touched your heart. These memories can sustain you when the world feels cold and unkind, and you need encouragement.

4. Get Back to a Normal Routine Quickly

Most employers allow a few days off for a person to grieve their loss, but some people need more. The key is to remember that getting back to your everyday life is better. The longer you’re off, the more time your mind has to wonder. Sometimes it’s scary to be alone with your thoughts when you’re reeling from a tragic loss.

5. Turn to Your Higher Power to Request Help With Your Mental Health

Strong people know their higher power is the first place they should turn to during tragic loss. Your faith will be tested during times like these, but it’s also when you can find the greatest fulfillment in your beliefs.

6. Surround Yourself with Positivity

Perhaps you had someone who was fatally wounded in the military. You will find that listening to the news and hearing about soldiers and war might be too much for you. Regardless of the situation, it would help if you found ways only to let the positivity in and keep the negativity at bay.

If you need to turn off the news feed on your phone, take a breather from social media, or keep the TV off, you must do what you need to for your mental health.

7. Seek Mental Health Therapy to Overcome the Sense of Loss

Therapists are trained professionals that help people through tragic loss every day. Finding a counselor, you can talk to that can give tips and tricks to manage heartache are powerful ways to take control of your misery.

8. Do Something in their Honor

Losing someone you love is gut-wrenching, but you can take your pain and do something to honor their memory. One example of such was Stephanie Spillman. She was 31 years old when she received the diagnosis of breast cancer.

Rather than cowering in the shadows and going through this journey with her family, she decides to educate others. She became a voice for other women and brought national acknowledgment to this disease. According to UA History, she and her husband, Chris, worked to help fellow central Ohio folks with similar conditions for years.

While Spillman passed in 2009, they raised millions for Ohio State University James Cancer Hospital. So, to honor her work after her death, her husband worked with the hospital to add a special wing for breast cancer dedicated to her memory. This is just one of the numerous examples where the loss of someone is used to help others.

9. Use Artistic Expression to Cope with Loss

Some of the best songs ever written were during a time of tragic loss, and perhaps this is why the lyrics are so touching. For instance, when the Notorious B.I.G. was killed, his friends P. Diddy and Faith Evans got together and wrote a powerful song to grieve. The music included special memories of their dear friend.

Maybe you can write a song, a poem, or draw a picture to help with your sorrow. Being proactive and allowing these emotions to come out in another way can be healing.

10. Find Comfort in the Smallest of Things

Every person is different, and so is the path they choose when grieving. You must find something that brings you peace, such as a cardinal. Many folks believe that when a cardinal appears near you that it’s the spirit of a loved one that’s passed on coming to comfort her.

This tradition has been around for decades, but these little things bring peace and give you the power to keep going.

11. Keep Your Sense of Humor

Though it’s going to be hard, you need to laugh. Find something that makes you smile, chuckle or even belly laugh every day. As they say, laughter is one of the best healing medicines around.

12. Write a Letter to Heaven

There were instances when you didn’t get to say goodbye and had lingering questions. One of the best ways to get closure and renew yourself is by writing a letter. Get everything out on paper, then burn it outside, allowing the smoke from the ashes to rise to the heavens.

13. Surround Yourself with Family and Friends

When dealing with a significant loss, you mustn’t isolate yourself behind four walls. You must realize that the more you lock yourself away, the easier it is for depression to creep in. Your mental health is of the utmost importance, so you must go out to dinner or hang out with family and friends.

14. Take Care of Your Mental Health After a Loss

Your self-care can’t be put on the back burner just because you’re devastated by a tragic loss. You still need to exercise, eat healthily and get plenty of sleep.

15. Share Your Feelings About the Loss with Others

You’re not the only person going through a tragic loss; many folks find themselves troubled and struggling. Ted Talks is a great platform for people to share their stories of overcoming obstacles. You can work on a large scale with one of these platforms or do something small in your local community, but sharing your experiences can be healing.

Final Thoughts on Ways to Be Stronger After a Tragic Loss

Did you find anything on the list that you think will help you? Remember that the pain and devastation you feel from this tragic loss are normal. However, there’s going to be a point where you must carry on. You must learn to accept what has happened as a reality and find a way to move forward.

Some find it’s easier when they start embracing life again, but whatever it takes to heal, you must do it. You can’t stay down for too long, as you’re strong and an overcomer. Look at all the things you’ve already overcome in life.

10 Behaviors That Break Trust In A Relationship

November 15, 2022 by Chris Butler

Having a great relationship is a balancing act. Not only do you need to ensure your needs are met, but you also must be considerate of your partner and their desires. There are times when things are going well. But if someone has done something to destroy trust, you might believe it’s time to give up. Can you fix this?

There’s a proverbial line drawn that they can’t go back once a couple crosses. This line includes usually includes infidelity. How can people move forward when the one supposed to love them hurts them so badly?

10 Behaviors That Destroy the Trust of a Partner

Have you done things that have made your partner distrust you? Would you forgive yourself if the roles were reversed? Here are ten behaviors that might make your relationship rocky or even destroy it.

1. You Destroy Trust if You’re Not Honest

If you lie to your spouse, you will destroy your trust. Sometimes people lie because the truth is too painful to admit, or they want to keep the other person from getting hurt. You can rest assured that they will be more hurt by your deception than they will by the truth.

Though it’s challenging to be honest when you’ve done wrong, it’s better to get it out in the open and deal with the situation. Lying is never an effective way to hide something, as it will always come back to haunt you.

2. You Haven’t Been Faithful

Faithfulness in a relationship is one of the top concerns. According to Infidelity Statistics, 90 percent of people in this country think that affairs are wrong, but more than 50 percent of all committed relationships will eventually face infidelity. Regardless of the situation, getting over such a devastating blow is hard.

Still, you can work through this situation and go forwards, but you must be willing to forgive and rebuild your trust.

3. Manipulative Behaviors Will Destroy the Trust

A manipulative person might use gaslighting to keep another person in check. If you play mind games and use your relationship for personal gain, you will find that your faithfulness to your partner is skewed. Dealing with a narcissistic personality disorder can make the other party distrust you and your motives toward them.

4. You’re Not Trustworthy

Being trustworthy is about more than lying. You can ruin the trust between one another by not having each other’s best interests at heart. For instance, if your partner tells you something personal and doesn’t want to get out, you can ruin your trust by gossiping.

They will think twice about telling you anything further. Not only does it show that you’re not trustworthy, but you also lack dedication. How can they trust you when you tell their intimate secrets to others?

5. You Don’t Express Your Feelings

Keeping your feelings hidden can be a big issue. It would help if you were honest enough to say what’s on your mind and express how you feel. When you suppress these emotions, the other person doesn’t know what’s wrong or how to fix it.

It can be overwhelming to have someone emotionally closed off to their partner. It may appear you’re playing games or have an issue with them.

6. You Destroy Trust When You Can’t Accept Their Friends & Family

Every person wants their friends and family to love the one who stole their heart. However, if you don’t have the same respect and love in return, it can tense the situation. When you commit to someone, their family and friends come with them as a package deal.

You’ve heard stories of in-laws that sabotage relationships, but there must be some mutual respect. When you marry someone, you also marry their family.

7. You May Destroy Trust if You Have a Terrible Temper

Someone who is very temperamental can be quite a handful. Your partner feels like they can’t talk to you about anything as you’re like a bomb about to explode. They also may feel like your fuse is so short they walk on eggshells to keep things from erupting.

A temper issue is an indication that someone has anger problems. According to The Mayo Clinic, many people have tension, grudges, stress, and personality disorders behind their rage. A temper can destroy a relationship, especially if combined with gaslighting or verbal abuse.

8. You Don’t Communicate Well

Communication is one of the foundations of your union, and you must listen more than you speak. Your partner has a voice and wants to be heard. If you’re too busy complaining about your life and feelings, they may feel like they’re not essential or their feelings don’t count.

9. You Break Promises Regularly

When you make a promise to your partner, it creates an expectation and a bond of trust between you. However, if you habitually break your promises, no matter how small they are, it can significantly damage the trust in your relationship.

It might be easy to overlook or dismiss the breaking of a minor promise, but doing this consistently sends the message to your partner that you don’t take your commitments to them seriously. It undermines your reliability and could lead your partner to question your honesty in more significant matters. Keep your word and fulfill the promises you make. If you can’t keep a promise for a valid reason, be upfront about it and discuss the situation honestly.

10. Neglecting the Needs of Your Partner Can Destroy Trust

You and your partner both have needs. Your needs are physical, emotional, and spiritual. While you cannot fulfill their spiritual needs, you can help with their psychical and emotional ones.

If you neglect any of their needs, it can destroy trust and ruin your relationship. Things like denying intimacy can cause them to seek other places to fulfill these desires, though this is not an excuse for infidelity.

10 Ways to Restore Trust With Your Partner

Now that trust has been destroyed, it’s time to fix what’s been broken. Nothing can keep you apart if you both want to resolve things badly enough. However, if only one person works to repair the relationship, it will never work. Here are some things you can try.

1. Attend Counseling

Counseling is an excellent way for you both to start the rebuilding process. Since the therapist is a third party who looks from the outside, they can quickly identify issues and know where to begin the hard work.

2. Try Couples Exercises

There are many exercises out there that can help you become closer together. For instance, writing an appreciation list, eliminating stress, unplugging from technology, and having an open period to talk about things, can help you rebuild.

3. Make Time For One Another

Whether you’ve been dating for six months or married for twenty years doesn’t matter. It would help if you spent quality time together. If you don’t make time for the one you love, someone else will quickly swoop in and do everything they desire.

4. Vow To Be Honest in All Aspects

Taking a vow of honesty is hard to live by, even when it eliminates white lies. Even if it hurts, you must be honest with one another.

5. You Must Want the Relationship to Work

Above all else, you must want the relationship to work. If you don’t have your heart in it and are not giving a hundred percent, you’re wasting your time.

6. Be Vulnerable

Being vulnerable means opening up the innermost parts of your heart and life and sharing them. You may have some emotional baggage from other relationships holding you back. As a result, you may need to talk to your partner about serious issues you never disclosed. Putting all your cards on the table is a great way to rebuild the destroyed trust.

According to Good Therapy, you must be willing to let your guard down to heal. People often go into these situations, still reserved, afraid they will be hurt again if they put themselves out there. However, sometimes you must tear everything out to put it back together correctly.

7. Make Your Needs Known

It would be best if you made your needs known to your partner. Don’t hold anything back as you go through this rebuilding process; your dedication means everything. Speak up and let your voice be heard because this is the time to get everything out in the open.

8. Establish Boundaries

Before going forward with the restoration process, you need to establish boundaries. These safety zones are there to protect you from further hurt. Your partner should respect the limits you set, and you should respect theirs.

9. Analyze Things from Their Perspective

The best thing you can do for your partner is to step into their shoes for a minute. Look at things through their eyes and see how they view matters. Keeping the situation one-sided is easy, but it changes everything when you look at things differently.

10. Make a New Commitment

Once you’ve decided to work on the things that hinder your relationship and destroy trust, it’s time to make a new commitment to each other. Define your relationship anew and make goals for the future. You can’t leave things in the condition they’re in, so you must try to move forward.

Final Thoughts on Things That Destroy Trust and the Rebuilding Process

You can have the perfect relationship that’s been vital for years, and all it takes is one foolish mistake to change everything. However, if you’re both committed to making things work, there are steps you can take to rebuild the trust and get back to a place where you’re both happy with each other.

5 Signs of a Guilt Trip to Never Ignore

November 14, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

A guilt trip is a form of indirect communication that creates feelings of guilt or discomfort in the recipient. They are common in close relationships where each party cares about the other’s emotions. The manipulative tactic can be performed in other, more distant relationships but are less likely to incite guilt in either party successfully.

For many, guilt trips are accidental. We naturally feel guilty when we worry that we’ve hurt someone we care about or think we haven’t done our fair share of something. As such, someone pointing that out can be sufficient to create a guilt trip, and that doesn’t have to be a bad thing.

But some people use guilt trips as a means of controlling others. These toxic people resort to this and other forms of emotional blackmail to coerce others into doing what they want. If you’re unsure if someone’s doing this to you, look for these five signs that someone’s using the classic guilt trip to get their way.

1. Someone Who Uses A Guilt Trip Will Bring Up Your Past Wrongs

To guilt trip someone, a person may opt for emotional blackmail by bringing up previous wrongs from the person they’re guilt-tripping. They’ll act as if the other person is constantly doing bad things and that they’re innocent and undeserving of that treatment.

This abuse often involves talking about past mistakes and referring to them calculatingly to get the other person to feel bad and do something to compensate for that. You’ll notice that playing the victim is ubiquitous among guilt trippers and toxic people, and it’s certainly true here.

Of course, we’re not talking about pointing out common issues in a relationship that need work. This isn’t to say that you can’t or shouldn’t talk about complicated negative patterns you’ve noticed. But there’s a time and place for such discussion. Furthermore, there’s a way to do this respectfully and productively.

Specifically, a guilt trip that involves bringing up past wrongs means talking about things that:

Were already resolved and moved on from
Were never brought up as an issue by either party, to begin with
It occurred differently than the way they’re being presented for the guilt trip

2. They Bring Up Their Past Rights

This reinforces the previous point. In addition to bringing up the wrongs of others, a guilt tripper will often bring up the things they’ve done right in the past. They’ll list their actions for you or a group and contrast your behavior to theirs. They may say things like:

I’ve done so much for you, and you do this to me?
I have never forgotten an important date, but you couldn’t even greet me happy birthday?
I’ve been putting in lots of extra hours at this job, and it’s discouraging to work so hard when everyone else keeps taking time off.

Again, there’s some nuance to this. There are respectful and productive ways to bring up problems of this kind. But someone using a classic guilt trip for the sake of control will amp up these discrepancies to paint a picture of their innocence and your cruelty.

If you start to feel like everything nice someone does will eventually be thrown back in your face and used against you, this is a sign of a manipulative guilt-tripper.

3. A Person Employing A Guilt Trip Will Avoid Conflict Staunchly

Direct conflict can often kill the severity of guilt because the people involved will be hashing out their emotions and thoughts. Someone using a classic guilt trip will not want this to happen. They need to continue to make themselves appear innocent and as a martyr, so they can’t be involved in any form of aggressive conflict.

As such, classic guilt trippers will find a way to avoid conflict while conveying their message. These avoidance tactics will irritate, infuriate, and confuse you into experiencing guilt. Most commonly, someone may do this with the following methods:

· Silent Treatment Goes Along With a Classic Guilt Trip

The goal of silent treatment in a classic guilt trip is to fill in the blanks yourself. The guilt tripper can opt for complete inaction, ignoring and stonewalling you, so you feel confused and desperate. You’ll do anything to determine what’s wrong and appease them.

· Denial Of Emotion as a Manipulative Tool

When you directly ask a guilt tripper if something’s wrong, they may lie and say everything is fine. While their mouth says one thing, their actions will say another. After telling you everything is fine, they will visibly act as if it isn’t. This makes you feel uneasy and uncomfortable and can cause you to try and please them to avoid any issues that you feel brewing.

· Body Language Only

Human beings naturally pick up on a lot of body language in most cases. This means that a guilt tripper can avoid direct conflict by communicating non-verbally. They’ll shake their head, cross their arms, or adopt a disposition that makes it clear they’re upset with you.

Indeed, some people will try to keep their emotions to themselves to avoid conflict. But a guilt tripper will not hide their feelings – they’ll find alternative ways to communicate it. That way, you’ll feel the pressure of their emotions and experience guilt while they get the plausible deniability of being able to say they’re not doing anything to inflame you.

4. Somone Using A Guilt Trip Will Appeal To Emotions

Appeals to emotion aren’t unusual in any form of interaction. Most people know that it’s easiest to convince others to do things by making them feel something for the cause. Someone trying to guilt-trip you will utilize this to its fullest. They may do this by:

· Amping Up Their Emotional Reactions

Someone using a classic guilt trip may exaggerate their emotions to make you feel bad. They may burst into tears or act as you’ve entirely broken their heart, even when they don’t think that severely about this. Sure, it’s important to remember that not all emotional reactions are manipulative. But someone who amps up their emotions to a false degree is just trying to get you to do anything you can to stop them from continuing their reactions.

· Making You Feel Something Negative

No one wants to deal with bad feelings. If you feel something negative, you’ll likely want to make it go away as quickly as possible. Guilt trippers know this and will use it against you. They’ll talk about how your actions make them feel unloved, thus making you feel sad enough to do anything they want to help them feel loved again. They’ll say you never do what they ask, so you’ll feel like you have to do what they want to assuage the discomfort.

· Eliciting Sympathy in a Manipulative Way

Someone who wants to guilt trip you will try to prey on the natural sympathy for them. When you’re sympathetic, you’ll want to do things for them!

5. Somone Using Guilt Trip Tactics Will Act Like They’re On High Ground

A manipulative and controlling person will guilt trip you by acting like they’re on some form of high ground. They may act morally, intellectually, or physically superior to you to make you feel smaller, say studies.

These people may frame their actions as a form of moral education. They’ll act like they’re teaching you something you’re not wise enough to know. They’ll insist that the behavior they want out of you is somehow the “right” behavior and that your current behavior is inferior.

There’s a lot of difference between guiding someone with genuine wisdom and simply framing yourself as superior. Someone using a classic guilt trip doesn’t want you to learn the truth or be better. They want you to fall in line according to their desires. They may make this happen by:

Referring to the harsh words they use as “tough love,” framing it as if it’s for your good
Acting like they have automatic authority over you or that they need to be responsible for you in some way
Intentionally using things you’re most sensitive about to get you to fall inline

This also means that they’ll often deflect any accountability or responsibility to you. It is manipulative! When you try to explain your side of the story or point to something harmful they’ve done, they’ll completely deflect you. They may turn everything into your fault by:

Saying that their negative behavior is only being performed because of your negative behavior
Justifying their manipulative actions by jumping through numerous mental hoops
Insinuating that you’re rightfully deserving of the negative actions that they perform while they don’t deserve anything that you’ve done

Final Thoughts On Signs Someone Uses Guilt Trip To Get Their Way

Guilt is a very complex thing. This emotion has some positive purposes, and it’s acceptable and healthy to feel guilty about some things. This is especially true if you use that emotion to fuel positive change, improvement, or accountability.

On top of that, a guilt trip isn’t always born out of manipulation. Because of how easy it is to trigger guilt in others in our close relationships. Indeed, it can happen accidentally or through genuine communication. Someone might mention that you’re not doing your part in a relationship – whether platonic, professional, familial, or romantic – and supplement that with evidence that they have done their part.

The topic of guilt-tripping is nuanced. It can be a part of someone’s genuine efforts to inspire a good, necessary change. However, even well-intentioned guilt-tripping can backfire. And, of course, people use this trick to get what they want from other people.

Ultimately, if someone uses a classic guilt trip to get their way, you must examine the situation with nuance and understanding. This will allow you to discern toxic people doing this as a form of manipulation so you can push back or disengage. Keep an eye out for the signs of a guilt trip, and learn to respond productively for each manipulative tactic!

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