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10 Ways to Overcome Self-Pity and Be Happy Again

October 9, 2022 by Power of Positivity

Have you ever felt sorry for yourself? It’s a normal reaction to occasional disappointments and hurt in life. Although it’s okay to experience self-pity, it’s not a mental place you want to stay.

You often internalize the pain when you’ve been hurt by someone or by unexplainable circumstances. You want to roll up in a ball and hide under the blankets to insulate yourself from the evil world. During depressive times, you’re apt to experience a seesaw of emotions from anger, sadness, and even hopelessness.

A study published in the Journal of Personality by Dr. Joachim Stober mentions the link between self-pity and personality, anger, and beliefs about control. Stober states that people who constantly feel sorry for themselves often believe that chance and influential people control them. They often ruminate on the pain and anger and have lonely, worrisome attachments.

Feeling Sorry for Yourself (Self-Pity) Versus Self-Compassion

There’s a big difference between feeling sorry for yourself and practicing self-compassion. The pity for yourself leaves you stuck in the mire of negative emotions and self-destructive behaviors. While it puts you in center stage, it does nothing to solve any problems.

However, self-compassion acknowledges that life can sometimes be challenging and even hurtful. Not everybody has your best interests at heart. Self-compassion recognizes the hurt you’ve experienced while inspiring you to find healing solutions.

You have the choice to learn from negative experiences and grow or to allow them to suppress your confidence and ambition. Being compassionate with yourself brings you to those crossroads and helps you choose the right path. Pity parties may seem justifiable for the moment, but the only one who loses, in the long run, is you.

1. Acknowledge Your Feelings

Just because you are an emotionally intense person doesn’t mean you won’t experience negative emotions occasionally. It’s part of life and something that you’re best to acknowledge with self-compassion. Permit yourself to feel the raw edges of grief, anger, and despair.

Once you confront your self-pity in the mirror of your consciousness, you cope with them. Realize that it’s a waste of time and energy wondering about the fairness of the world. Some questions don’t have answers, so you work your way through them.

A Psych Central article written by Jeffrey Ditzell, D.O., explains clearly why you should not ignore your emotions:

“Think of your negative thoughts as an untrained, jumping, barking dog. You can try and ignore them, tell them “no,” or turn on Netflix to tune them out, but they’ll keep hounding you until you give them some attention.”

2. Question Your Perceptions

Why is it easier to accept negative perceptions than positive ones? The pain and emotions keep snowballing when a person or a situation has hurt you. You may focus on negative points in your life rather than all your blessings.

When you feel overwhelmed with negativity and believe the sky is falling, stand back for a moment. Have the emotions from feeling sorry for yourself tainted the perception of your world? Allow yourself to experience the hurt, but don’t lose sight of all the positive things you have.

3. Recognize When You’re Struggling

Has a friend or loved one ever done you wrong, and you can’t get past it? Maybe you’ve experienced a big disappointment like a job loss or a missed opportunity. The longer you refuse to deal with your feelings, the longer they will fester into bitterness and negativity.

Since your actions often mirror your feelings, self-pity may cause you to snap at people or avoid socialization. These unchecked emotions and behaviors may lead to anxiety and depression. When you take control initially, it’s easier not to allow yourself to get to this point.

4. Turn Your Negative Emotions into a Challenge

Do you know that the law of attraction works for positive and negative affirmations? Your thoughts may turn dark if you’re throwing a colossal pity party for yourself. Since you’re experiencing one bad incident, may you assume more are on the way?

You may send negative affirmations into the Universe like “I never get a break in life,” or “Everybody is out to hurt and destroy me.” The Universe hears your affirmations and returns in kind, and you’ll continually reap negativity. Things will only change when you change your attitude and affirmations.

For example, “I may have lost this time, but I have better opportunities coming” or “They hurt me, but I still have countless people who are still at my side.” Again, your affirmations attract like, and the silver linings shine through the clouds.

5. Practice Gratitude Each Day

Feeling sorry for yourself often acts as a smothering blindfold. The painful emotions from your situation distract you from beautiful blessings. Being grateful shifts your attitude back into focus.

You can practice gratitude to make a list and post it where you see it daily. Look at your list when you feel down in the dumps and are tempted to drown yourself in pity. Gratitude is a persuasive reminder of how strong you are and how the Universe has your back.

The March 2019 NIH Newsletter, News in Health, had this to say about how gratitude can increase positive thoughts.

“When you make gratitude a regular habit, it can help you learn to recognize good things in your life despite the bad things that might be happening.”

6. Use Your Time Wisely

Life is way too short to waste on a pity party where you’re the only guest. Instead, push past the pity and use the time to think of solutions for your problem. How can you use your resources to make the situation better?

For example, you may feel miserable because you were passed over for a job promotion. You could cover yourself in resentment for your boss and your disappointments. Or you could learn from the experience and find ways to hone your knowledge and skills for the next time.

7. Close the Complaint Department

How do you feel around a negative person who constantly moans and complains about everything? Before long, their negative words and attitude bring you down. Refuse to be that miserable person in your mind or with others.

Do you have a situation that keeps you down in the dumps? Instead of bellyaching, decide that you’re doing something to make changes. If a situation is beyond your control, find healthy ways to cope with it.

Remember that complaints turn into negative affirmations that disperse throughout the Universe. Do yourself a favor and put a positive spin on your problem. You’ll be surprised at the creative solutions coming your way soon.

8. Lend a Hand

Self-pity locks you in a dark solitary place, and your unchecked emotions shackle you. When you’re hurting, it’s easy to think that you’re the only person who’s ever experienced such pain. A simple glance around you will tell you a different story.

In fact, you may also see your problems in a different light when you see the struggles of others. The things you thought were singular and unforgivable may pale compared to other people’s experiences. They may also be an inspiration for solutions in your own life.

Helping others allows you to feel good about yourself and to get other perspectives. According to an article published by the British Mental Health Foundation, these acts of kindness may boost your happiness, optimism, and feelings of self-confidence.

The Mayo Clinic agrees. They note that volunteering to help others can ease symptoms of depression, lower stress, and might help you live longer. All these things can contribute to reducing your feeling sorry for yourself.

9. Recognize Patterns of Self-Pity in Your Life

As you reflect on your life’s landscape, notice any patterns of feeling sorry for yourself. Were these isolated incidences, or were they patterns of behavior that caused you turmoil? These situations may have been exacerbated by blaming others or harboring resentment.

What actions can you take to avoid these pitfalls in the future? This step requires self-honesty, accepting responsibility, and making necessary changes. You’ll also learn to recognize when you are ruminating on your past and stop it before it gets out of hand.

10. Learn to Apologize and Practice Forgiveness

It’s a bitter pill to swallow when you realize that your actions brought on some of the problems in your life. Sometimes, part of the solution is to own your mistakes, apologize, and make amends. True apology involves an effort not to repeat the offense, not just saying you’re sorry.

Are you nursing a grudge from people who’ve hurt you? Feeling sorry for yourself is normal and thinking the world is against you. Soon, the bitterness consumes you, and you’re oblivious to any blessings and joys around you.

It’s a harmful misconception that forgiving somebody lets them off the hook. It neither downplays nor excuses the offense or the offender. In hindsight, you may find explanations for the wrongdoing, but not an excuse.

Forgiveness is a kind, positive action you do for yourself. It breaks the crippling bonds of resentment so that you can go on with your life. You can’t forget the hurt, but you can acknowledge it and leave it in the past.

You can offer forgiveness without the offender being present. Sometimes, you may need to forgive yourself for your past wrongs and shortcomings. Either way, do it with decisiveness and compassion.

Final Thoughts on Learning How to Stop Feeling Sorry for Yourself

As with all life’s greatest lessons, learning how to redirect self-pity requires time, patience, and self-compassion. It’s empowering when you discover how to learn and grow from painful experiences. The rain may fall on the just and the unjust, but self-compassion can be your umbrella.

10 Causes of Cheating, According to Counselors

October 8, 2022 by Chris Butler

Have you ever wondered about the causes of cheating?

Why do people go outside of the realms of their relationship for their emotional and physical needs? There are many theories on why this happens, but many counselors believe it’s all about science.

Could there be a scientific reason why a person cheats? First, you must realize that there are many unfaithful levels, and everyone has philosophies on cheating. Some folks believe that if you talk or text someone without the other person knowing, it’s dishonest, while others feel there needs to be some physical activity to be classified as a cheater.

People have cheated on their spouses since the dawn of time. While it may seem like a modern world, it’s been going on for centuries. The interesting fact behind all of this is that many studies indicate cheaters may be inclined to do so based on their biology.

Could there be genetic and biological explanations for why some are unfaithful? It’s a common occurrence as a study cited by the National Library of Medicine found that in 2020, more than 25 percent of relationships had infidelity.

The Ten Typical Causes of Cheating, According to Relationship Therapists

Society is full of cheating, and since it’s such a common thing, it’s essential to understand it as much as possible. While you may see this as an emotional act, there are scientific reasons behind the causes of cheating.

1. The Person Favors Rock and Roll

A UK survey found a surprising musical preference among cheaters.

It sounds bizarre, but many cheaters love music, specifically the rock and roll varieties. The referenced survey study looked deep into the characteristics of cheaters, and one of the shocking similarities was music preference. So, what’s the scientific reasoning behind this strange similarity?

Rock and roll fans tend to be a bit rebellious and are not afraid to walk on the wild side. Remember the classic 1980s bands with members who lived on the edge? The rock genre is full of people who defy the normal expectations of society, so is it any wonder why they might be inclined to have a fling on the side?

Think back to all the famous rock stars that you adored. How many of them were guilty of cheating on their spouses? What is it about the proverbial bad boy that drives women wild?

2. They’re Happy in Their Relationship – Just Bored

The first thought that comes to mind when you hear of someone cheating is that they’re unhappy with their current relationship. They may not have good communication, or the other person doesn’t have time for them. Oddly enough, none of that is true.

Would you be shocked to hear that most people cheat because they’re bored? The relationship is always spicy initially, but things settle into a pattern over time and become more comfortable. They never fell out of love with their partner but became bored when things weren’t as sizzling as they used to be.

Most infidelity isn’t about physical attraction at all, and it’s bout easing the pangs of boredom.

3. It’s A Way to Reinvigorate A Lackluster Situation

Anyone would think that having an affair would make their relationship better is odd, yet some people think it will help. Perhaps the excitement they feel during the affair will give their mojo in their current relationship a boost.

While it seems like twisted thinking, science and counselors say it’s one reason people cheat. They feel it’s a way to reinvigorate the stale conditions of their current relationship.

4. They Want the Attention of Being Caught

Another bizarre reason why people cheat is they want to get caught. This falls back into the rebellious nature of humans, but some people want their spouses to catch them being unfaithful. The affair might not be exciting, but the thrill of being caught can send your hormones into overdrive.

Indeed, some people feel a “cheater’s high,” a hormonal rush arising from the thrill of infidelity.

5. They Get Too Comfortable with Someone They Know

Did you know that most affairs happen with people you already know? Forget those one-night stands after visiting a club; many cheaters choose someone they know. One of the causes of cheating is people get too close and cross the boundaries between friend and lover.

Take, for instance, a couple having problems in their relationship. It may be too easy to confide in a friend of the family. However, feelings of empathy develop once you start getting too personal with someone.

Those feelings cause the person to want to comfort you in any way possible. One hug turns to stronger embraces, a kiss, and finally, a full-blown physical act. Think back to all the people you’ve known who have had affairs.

How many of those people were to a best friend, family friend, relative of the other party, or other close affiliation? It’s uncanny, but it’s a recipe for disaster when people become too familiar with one another and start talking about their troubles.

6. PMS Causes Hormonal Shifts That Make Women Have Affairs

Everyone knows that a lady’s hormone gets all out of whack during her time of the month. However, many counselors have found that the lady is more likely to cheat during ovulation than during other times of the month. It’s theorized that the emotional instability caused by her ovulation mode can make a female more apt to mood swings or to make emotional decisions.

7. Improving Intimacy for Current Relationship

So, if you’re not the best cook, you’re likely to take some classes or watch videos on how to do things better. The same can be said of your intimate relationships. If you don’t feel you’re the best in the bedroom, you might be inclined to learn a few tricks from someone more experienced.

It’s not a good reason to step outside the boundaries of a relationship, but many people feel that it can improve things with their spouse if they get some training from a third party. There are certain expectations of one another when it comes to romance; often, one party doesn’t feel good enough. It’s certainly advisable to keep things fresh in your physical relationship as things can quickly become mundane and boring.

8. Ladies Cheat for Emotional Reasons and Men for Physical Ones

If you could summarize the causes of cheating into a nice, little package, you would find that women cheat due to their emotions, and men cheat because of physical needs. Most ladies cross those emotional lines, which turn into physical ones.

Men, on the other hand, tend to be in it for the purely physical aspects. It’s the beast’s nature and shows the different sexes’ various tendencies. Men are always seen as more likely to have an affair, and a study backs this theory. The Institute for Family Studies researched that men are seven percent more likely to cheat than women.

9. Lack of Maturity

Do you remember telling your young children not to touch the stove because they will get burnt? However, it wasn’t until they touched the stove and felt the discomfort they learned why they should have stayed away. Men tend to have a lack of maturity when it comes to women.

Guys don’t often think about infidelity’s consequences, so they act now and pay later. They don’t get overly involved in the emotional and physical aspects of cheating, but they soon learn that there are scorching repercussions that come later.

Some counselors concede that men don’t know how to fix issues in their current relationship, so they look outside to fill their needs. They don’t want to leave their wife, but they don’t know how to deal with the problems they have at that time.

10. Disillusioned with the Idea of Marriage

Some folks fall in love with being in love. They see their friends or relatives getting married and starting a life, and they feel that it’s also what they’re supposed to do. However, long-term committed relationships take real work.

No one knows how challenging it is to live with someone day and night until they do it. To some individuals, cheating is just an act of skin-on-skin. It’s not that they don’t love their spouse, but it’s more about the fact that they got into a situation they don’t know how to handle, and infidelity makes them feel better.

Final Thoughts on The Causes of Cheating

The causes of cheating are vast, and each person and situation is different. The bottom line is that people have an affair because they want to. Sure, it can be caused by being unhappy with their partner, the chemistry is gone, or an inner need for more attention, but the most significant cause of cheating is that someone wants to do it.

Like a child with impulse control issues, many people don’t truly understand the repercussions of stepping outside the confines of their relationship. However, they soon find that they’re in over their head, and they may lose the best thing that ever happened to them because of a lack of willpower.

10 Behaviors That Can Unblock Your Intuitive Ability

October 8, 2022 by Power of Positivity

Did you know most people have a hint of intuition in their minds? It’s just more developed and prevalent for some. The good news is that you can bring out the best of your intuitive ability by adopting certain habits.

Have you ever “known” something in your mind before you’ve even had a chance to study and rationalize it? Some people call this phenomenon their inner voice or gut feeling. Nobody knows how your intuitive ability works.

In an article in the Association for Psychological Science, Dr. Joel Pearson introduces a study about intuition that he conducted with colleagues.

Pearson’s analysis concludes that people can use this unconscious knowledge for decisions and guidance throughout their lifetime. He also states in the article that intuitive ability can be scientifically measured.

Do You Have Intuitive Ability?

Your inner voice may surprise you at times. For example, maybe you awoke one morning with a deep concern for a friend or loved one. That day, the same person calls you and says they were almost in a car wreck about the same time they came to your mind. Is it merely a coincidence, or were you connecting on a higher level with the person?

Although such an example is rare for most people, it may occur more often than others. Have you ever made important decisions based on a gut feeling? In hindsight, you may have found that your intuition was usually correct.

• Psychic Versus Intuitive Ability

Although intuitive ability and psychic ability are somewhat related, the terms aren’t interchangeable. Almost all psychics are intuitive, but not all intuitive people are psychics. The difference is how the information is processed.

If you’re psychic, you can receive messages through your five senses. Then, it’s up to your sixth physic sense to interpret those messages. On the flip side, intuition gives you an interpretation before you have any information about the situation.

Do You Have Gut Feelings?

How often do you listen to your inner voice for direction? We all have one, but some people are more familiar with theirs. According to an article published by Discover Magazine, psychologists aren’t sure if everyone has intuition or an inner voice.

However, Dr. James Honeycutt explains that listening to your gut feeling may help problem-solving and goal setting.

Do you want to develop your intuitive ability and have more confidence in your decisions? While you should always review facts to make an informed decision, your heart’s voice matters, too. Here are ten habits that can unblock your intuition and allow you to benefit from it.

1. Recognizing Your Inner Voice

When you buy a new tool or device, it’s wise to read the directions before using it. Likewise, being more familiar with your inner voice can help you develop better intuitive abilities. It’s usually that same soft, gentle voice that you hear in your mind when you are reading or thinking.

However, your intuition may not always speak to you in words. Often it will use symbols that are singularly recognizable to you. This is the same mental process you have when you dream.

Whether you hear a voice, see symbols, or just feel an urge, your inner being is trying to communicate. Try to pay attention to this gentle guidance and see how it affects situations in your life. The more you use your intuition, the stronger it will become.

2. Schedule Intuitive Exercises

It’s never easy when you are trying to juggle caring for your family, career, and other social responsibilities. Most people must schedule time for physical fitness and other self-care each day. While strengthening your body, remember to include time for your mind and spirit.

Dedicate a few minutes each day to ponder problems and important decisions. Sit quietly and tune into your gut feelings. Not only do these exercises help you become more sensitive, but they may enhance your creative problem-solving skills.

3. Trust Yourself

We have Shakespeare’s plays to thank for countless words of wisdom, such as “to thine own self be true.” Do you find that it’s easier to listen to other people’s advice more than your own intuition? Maybe it’s because you need more faith in yourself.

Nobody knows you better than you do. Remind yourself daily that you are worthy and can trust your inner wisdom. Solid faith in your intuitive ability can mean better decisions and completion of your life’s goals.

4. Work with the Universe

Everything is eternally linked in the Universe on a cosmic level. Your actions, words, and thoughts attract the same, positive or negative. It’s called the law of attraction, and you can use it for your benefit.

As you hone your intuitive skills, try posing questions aloud. You can address these to the Universe, a deity, or however you identify the Source of Knowledge. Ask questions about problems and decisions, and listen to your heart’s voice. The Universe will align with your affirmations, and you’ll notice more positive changes.

5. Explore Your Intuitive Ability Through Writing

Isn’t it frustrating when you have an inspiring thought and can’t remember it later? Here’s another benefit of keeping a journal. While you meditate and focus on your intuitive voice, have your journal handy for jotting down any words, symbols, or impressions you receive.

Journaling can be your central tool to practice listening to your inner voice, trusting yourself, and uniting with the Universe. You build up confidence in your intuition when you review past journal entries. You’re more apt to trust yourself as you see positive outcomes.

6. Make Some Space

A study published by Dr. Joseph Ferarri in Current Psychology suggests a connection between clutter and procrastination, both behavioral and indecision. Being surrounded by piles of stuff can raise your anxiety levels and contribute to depression and other mental issues. With your space and your mind drowning in clutter, it’s almost impossible to listen to your inner voice.

Does your living space look more like a flea market than a personal sanctuary? Clearing away the clutter not only gives you more room to move and breathe, but it can clear your mind. It may take some time to sort things to sell, donate, recycle, or pitch, but it’s worth the effort.

7. Practicing Gratitude

Sometimes, it’s easy to have a negative attitude when the media bombards you every day with doom and gloom. Unfortunately, such an attitude can stifle your inner voice and give it a negative vibration. There’s no pretending that evil exists, and catastrophes happen, but they needn’t be your daily focus.

Instead, concentrate on the beautiful things in your life and show gratitude. Consider devoting a section of your journal to composing a gratitude list. You may think of so many things to write that you may need a separate gratitude journal.

How often were you or a loved one spared heartache or disaster? Did your heart’s voice play a part in it? When you are grateful for the multitude of blessings you have, you cultivate more contentment and joy.

8. Try Divination Tools

While there’s a difference between being psychic and intuitive, both skills can be boosted by using divination tools. Contrary to popular belief, tools like runes and tarot cards aren’t magical and can’t predict the future. They use symbols that the reader subjectively interprets.

Many of these divination tools have been used for thousands of years. Many people use crystals to increase their spiritual vibrations and focus on their intuitive side. You can use oracle cards, runes, a crystal ball, or a water scrying bowl. Choose the tool or tools that best speak to you.

9. Find a Mentor

Since some people are naturally more in tune with their heart’s voice than others, they make wonderful mentors. Nobody knows why, but intuitive skills often run in families. If you have a relative or friend you find exceptionally intuitive, talk to them about ways to better develop your skills.

Many cultures throughout history and today practice elder veneration. They believe that the younger generation has much to learn from their elder’s words and experience. Also, you may be surprised by how intuitive children can be when you talk to them.

10. Hear the Voice of Nature

Some of the most profound internal discussions you may have with yourself can be in the great outdoors. There’s something mystical and straightforward about being surrounded by verdant trees, plants, and woodland creatures. As you stroll through a forest or your neighborhood park, listen to your heart as the birds sing overhead.

Walking can benefit you physically, mentally, and spiritually. Please think of how the animals rely on their instincts and don’t question themselves. Although humans need reasoning, you also need to listen to your inner voice.

Final Thoughts on Unblocking Your Intuitive Ability

When you learn to block the noise and confusion of the world for a while, you’ll better hear that still, small voice. The more you learn to listen and trust your gut instinct, you may see a difference in your life. Sometimes, you make a choice just because it feels right.

6 Ways Positive Affirmations Can Help Change Lives

October 8, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

Positive affirmations are statements, phrases, and sentences affirm your belief in your capabilities, skills, and value. They are commonly used to fight negative thought patterns and can change lives. These phrases can be a powerful tool in improving how you see the world. Usually, these sentences are repeated in a mantra-like fashion for a short period every day.

How can simply saying some phrases repeatedly be so effective? This is desirable because the human brain tends to latch onto what it is told and manifest it. The brain isn’t great at figuring out what’s real and fake, so even the act of faking positivity works by slowly getting your brain to believe the words you say, even if you don’t believe them at first.

Of course, not everyone fully believes there’s a point to positive affirmations, and some roll their eyes at the concept. But these affirmations, as simple as they are, can work so many wonders that they’re worth trying, at least for a little while! Still not convinced? Here are six ways positive affirmations can help change our lives!

1. They Make You Kinder To Yourself

Self-compassion is a simple concept in theory but a complex trait to properly achieve. It involves the act of being kind to yourself with understanding and patience. For many, achieving this characteristic is tough and almost like a skill.

This is because:

You see yourself at your most flawed and worst.
The only people you can compare yourself to are those you usually see the best sides of that they present to the world.
You are more likely to have high standards for yourself than for others.
It is much easier to be cruel to yourself than to another individual.
Your inner voice is affected by your struggles and circumstances, so the more negative your situation, the less likely you are to think well of yourself.
Many people are conditioned to view self-compassionate acts as selfish or self-centered.

Due to all these reasons, it’s not surprising that self-compassion isn’t a common trait. But positive affirmations may be able to help with that, or so say studies. This is because affirmations can be used to remember your good qualities and capabilities and remind you that taking the time to care for yourself is okay.

Being kind to yourself is one of the most important steps to living a healthy life. While you also need to be responsible and hold yourself accountable, you shouldn’t neglect the need to be there for yourself. At the end of the day, you are the only person you can guarantee will be with you forever – so you’d better start being your best friend! Your life will change for the better when you intrinsically value yourself and your happiness.

2. They Reduce Your Need For External Validation

For many, it’s a significant struggle to stop desiring external validation from others. Seeking this kind of validation or “needing” it to feel better about yourself can lead to several problems, such as:

Constantly comparing yourself to others.
Doing things you don’t want to do solely for other people’s approval
Neglecting to focus on your journey in life
Viewing life as a race with finite resources
Burning yourself out to compete with others
Playing to other people’s strengths instead of your own
Believing every single bad thing said about you
Relying on other people to decide what’s best for you
Hinging your self-worth on what others say about you
Creating a false idea of those around you
Damaging your relationships with the people around you
Feeling depressed or anxious whenever you don’t receive external validation
Increasing your risk of being taken advantage of by those who can see your desperation for validation
Being too afraid to go against the grain and carve your path; sticking to the status quo, and stifling your creativity and innovative thought

This isn’t to say that being praised, rewarded, or recognized for your efforts by others won’t still feel good to you! No one can deny that it’s nice to see yourself appreciated. But relying solely on these extrinsic sources of validation to feel good about yourself is an unhealthy way to live your life.

Positive affirmations provide an internal source of attention and validation, so you don’t need to rely on extrinsic sources. You’ll be comfortable doing what makes you happy and forging your path, and you won’t let other people’s words get you down. It’s a state of personal satisfaction coveted by many in life!

3. They Boost Self-Esteem

A brain is a powerful tool. The more you bolster yourself by saying good things about yourself, the more likely you will internalize those good things into genuine positive thinking. This is why affirmations work; studies show they’re a good and workable tool for improving confidence in yourself.

Self-esteem is vital to your understanding of your worth. A lack of self-esteem can cause you to:

Settle for less than you deserve because you believe you aren’t good enough for more
Talk down to yourself negatively and damage your self-worth via a critical inner voice.
Develop a negative view of yourself that prevents you from achieving your full potential

When you have healthy self-esteem, you’ll be able to tackle negative thoughts and unlearn them until you truly believe in yourself. This doesn’t mean you’ll become arrogant. Instead, you’ll see yourself for the great person you are, know your strengths, and be confident in them!

Seeing yourself in a more positive light can dramatically change the way you look at the world, the opportunities you seize, and the way you let yourself be treated. Positive affirmations are a great way to rewire your brain naturally so you genuinely believe good things about yourself.

4. They Remind You About Small Good Things

It’s easy to overlook the little details in life when you’re stuck in negative thought patterns. Bad things can feel big and overwhelming, especially when they’re outside of your control, and during bad times, any good things at all can be hard to come by.

But positive affirmations can help you find the silver linings in all bad situations, even if they seem bleak at first.

They change lives by doing the following:

Finding small things to be grateful for in dire circumstances.
Reminding you to look for lessons you can learn from in bad situations instead of letting you dwell on negativity.
Providing insight into the temporary state of negativity, positive and negative situations alike will come and go, but your innate positivity will always remain.
Letting you spot all sorts of small good things in your everyday life, even when you’re dealing with bad times.

Learning to be more aware of small good things in life can permanently rewire your brain and rewrite your natural thinking patterns. You’ll learn to be more grateful, and gratitude increases with time the more you practice it. Living life with gratitude will bring you much inner peace and genuinely change your life for the better.

5. They’re Good For Your Health

Positive affirmations are commonly used to manage the effects of anxiety and depression. While they certainly aren’t cure-alls and don’t magically fix mental disorders, they certainly help you cope with some of their worst symptoms.

On top of being good for your mental health by increasing positive thinking despite disorders, these affirmations can also help physical health. This is because when your mental health improves, you’re under much less stress and strain from your daily life.

Many problems, like anxiety, depression, and high stress, are commonly linked to cardiovascular disease and blood pressure imbalance. These issues can also decrease motivation to make healthy choices and make one less interested in taking care of themselves.

Combining all of these factors means that by boosting mental health and emotional well-being, positive affirmations also help you stay healthy physically. That means that all aspects of fitness are well looked after through these affirmations!

6. They Can Help You Find Success

The very concept that using positive affirmations may improve your chances of finding success sounds far-fetched, but studies prove it! This is because:

When you have high regard for yourself, you gain more confidence.
With gains in confidence, you have more belief in yourself and your capabilities to reach your goals.
When you are confident, you are more likely to be able to take complex situations in stride.
Positive affirmations can motivate you to stick to commitments and overcome challenges.
Positive affirmations can help you pick yourself up and recover from failure.

Many people prefer to use defensive pessimism when gunning for success, which the previous research looks into as well. People want to “manage their expectations” by cautiously talking down about themselves. They think that by believing they may fail, they’re preventing themselves from facing disappointment. In reality, the only thing they’re preventing is their success.

While having reasonable belief in yourself and setting fair expectations is essential, it’s also crucial to believe that you can find success and be committed to putting in the work required for that goal. With positive affirmations, you’ll be able to coach yourself towards success – which can significantly change your life!

Final Thoughts on How Using Positivity Affirmationsaff Can Change Lives

Positive affirmations are incredible tools for improving your life. While they may not work to their most significant point for everyone, they almost always help people somehow and are worth giving a shot.

Not sure where to begin? Start by picking a specific thing you’d like to gain confidence or motivation in. For example, let’s say you want to be more focused on your tasks. You can then create a phrase or statement that speaks positively of your ability to achieve this goal, such as “I remain focused on my tasks,” “I complete my to-do list every day,” or “I am capable of completing what I set out to do.” You can even use more specific phrases, like “I will be living in my dream city by 2025”, or terms for more comprehensive concepts like “I am happy.”

The important thing is to speak with positive energy and positive language and use present tense when you do so. Positive affirmations will help you improve your self-esteem, boost your motivation, and improve your wellbeing as you gun for success!

5 Ways Overindulgence Can Harm Children

October 8, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

Do you overindulge your child? Overindulgence can be defined as the act of giving too much, too soon to your child all at once. This can come in presents, treats, rewards, praise, chores, school-related exercises, activities, and more. It seems alright on paper. But in practice, it is a highly harmful way to raise a child. Moreover, it can lead to lifelong psychological struggles.

There are rarely ever any harmful intentions from parents who overindulge their children. It can come from a place of concern and care. You want the best for your child, after all. So if you have more to give to your kid than your parents had to give to you, it’s natural to want to make sure they live a happier life than you did at their age.

Parents may also overindulge a child due to feelings of guilt. For example, if you’re often busy at work, you may give your kid many presents to make up for it. Some parents may also be burned out or unequipped to handle a poorly behaved child, causing them to cave into whatever their kid wants to keep the peace.

The bottom line is that overindulgence comes from the best intentions. Still, if you have been overindulging your child, you’re not necessarily a bad parent! Parenthood is tough, and you have to learn as you sometimes go, after all. Still not convinced that overindulging your child is bad for them? Here are five ways overindulgence can negatively affect a child’s mental and emotional wellbeing.

1. They Think Happiness Can Be “Bought.”

Mental and emotional wellbeing relies on more profound, more meaningful things than material possessions. But for children raised with overindulgent beliefs, the concept of happiness is shallow. Instead of being given the care and attention they needed, they were instead showered with material items or surface-level rewards.

This type of attention can cause children to associate happiness with material things naturally. Unfortunately, studies show that this damages positive thinking. Individuals who seek happiness via material objects typically do not find what they desire. On the other hand, those who use the material resources they have to further their life experiences have a much happier and healthier mental wellbeing.

In other words, children have to learn that experiences in life will make them happy and that happiness is something to be enjoyed as and when it comes, not a destination to find.

What are some possible outcomes of overindulgence?

Overindulgence prevents this healthy mindset from developing because:

Many overindulged children don’t get to have many experiences and are often very sheltered and confined. This sheltering makes seeking experiences later in life very difficult.
Effort and motivation are necessary to seek experiences for happiness. But overindulged children are likely to want happiness to fall into their lap through material objects.
Kids raised in a situation where they are overindulged, already accustomed, and attuned to the “buzz” of falsely positive neurological responses from receiving material items can become addicted to fake happiness.

Nobody needs to devote themselves to all-out minimalism, and it can be nice to have material objects. Still, your children must grow up knowing that there’s a balance to be found in that endeavor. For as long as you overindulge them, they won’t find that balance, and they’ll think that happiness lies in the items they own. It’s a lousy way to look at the world!

2. They Think They Need Certain Things To Live

Children who are overindulged are often given certain items to “tide them over.” For example, a kid who is anxious or shy may be given the promise of material rewards, such as toys, candy, or privileges, to motivate them further.

This means that they will begin to use items like these as a crux and will start to associate any success in their endeavors to the items they have.

For example:

They may believe that they can’t succeed at something without purchasing expensive equipment.
The child might refuse to learn a new skill unless they can take proper classes for it.
They may develop an attachment to material items, believing that they are nothing without them.
They might not have sufficient confidence to believe in their capabilities outside of their possessions.

It’s easy to see how this is harmful. The real world and adult life can sometimes involve making do with minimal, and grown-up experiences certainly won’t allow for perfect preparation at all times. And, of course, your kids will eventually see many people around them who can do great things without material items, which will make them question their worth.

No one likes feeling reliant on certain things to survive, especially as it becomes apparent that these reliances aren’t worth having. The sooner your children realize that they don’t need considerable material possessions to make it in life, the better for their mental and emotional wellbeing in the future.

3. They Don’t Value Anything

Overindulgence decreases the value of many things to a child. With the over-the-top influx of affection, toys, gifts, and similar “rewards,” a child will begin to view each one as the norm, reducing their value to something to be expected instead of enjoyed. Here are some things an overindulged child doesn’t value:

· Possessions

Overindulged children tend to think of material items as quickly and tirelessly disposable. This means they will break the things they have and take their privileges for granted because they only know a life packed with possessions.

· Relationships

An overindulged child won’t end up loving you more because you indulge them. Instead, they will begin to view relationships in this transactional manner, where they are given things they want or overprotected as a sign of love. This means they’ll devalue their relationship with you and carry on these unhealthy patterns in future relationships. They’ll have unrealistic expectations for both themselves and anyone they date.

· Other People

Social interaction and support are both important to well-being. But overindulged children tend to be selfish, according to studies. They think of themselves first and foremost and can have difficulty caring about others. This means that if you overindulge your kid, they are less likely to develop meaningful and supportive relationships and interactions with others.

4. Their Self-Worth Is Tied To The Wrong Things

Overindulged children receive all sorts of material items in exchange for adequately being raised and cared for. This can lead to adverse effects, as a child may grow up believing that their entire self-worth hinges on the things they own, the validation they receive from others, or how well-protected they are from hardship.

Self-worth that is truly healthy and positive must come from within and be motivated intrinsically. Children can only learn to think of themselves in this good light through careful teaching from their guardian figures – so overindulgence is not the way to go!

5. They Won’t Learn Necessary Life Skills

Overindulgence often involves:

Coddling a child and sheltering them to the extent that prevents them from being exposed to the necessary facts of life.
Walking a child through every step of different situations of even low difficulty, causing them to rely on you for constant instructions.
Providing a vast safety net for a child to rely on so they can make unwise choices without worrying about permanent harm.
Doing everything for a child to the point where they don’t learn how to do those things themselves.
Reducing a child’s need to take responsibility and accountability for their misbehavior.
Refusing to allow a child to explore safely and naturally.

It’s easy to see how this can cause your kid to grow up without the life skills they need for their adult life. You can’t always be there for your child, no matter how much you want to be, and there will come the point where you can’t protect or save them. Teaching them, so they know how to take care of themselves before that time comes is essential.

But how does this tie into mental and emotional well-being? According to research, adults find the most positive thinking through independence. A child who grows up without overindulgence will achieve the autonomy necessary for this positive state.

Specifically, the research mentioned above states:

Money and material possessions don’t contribute positively to well-being in any meaningful or lasting manner. But they can cause decreases in mental state.
Low levels of autonomy can worsen anxiety, burnout, and stress in many different cultures and societies.
Individualism is also essential; the more individualistic someone grows up to be, they likelier to enjoy good well-being.

Final Thoughts On Some Ways Overindulgence Negatively Affects A Child’s Mental And Emotional Wellbeing

Overindulging a child leads to learned helplessness that harms them in their adult life and causes them to latch onto ideas of self-worth based on materialism and surface-level concerns. And, of course, it damages your relationship with them and gives them unhealthy patterns in their future relationships.

In a nutshell, this means that overindulging your child will almost always lead to a more difficult time for them in adulthood. Additionally, it negatively affects their emotional and mental well-being. This is why it’s so vital that you learn other parenting styles to prevent your kids from falling into this trap.

You can avoid overindulging your child by creating healthy boundaries, limits, and rules. Then enforce the guidelines with a firm but fair hand. In addition, you should do your best not to over-nurture your child by doing everything for them. Indeed, this behavior will never allow them to learn or try things for themselves. Finally, don’t give too much to your child, whether “too much” includes screen time, toys, activities, or even learning materials.

Of course, as mentioned prior, a desire to overindulge your child may come from your issues. Speaking to a personal therapist or similar professional may grant you some insight into your overindulging impulses. Of course, there’s no shame in seeking help this way. Nor will there be shame in going to a specialist to learn healthier and more positive parenting styles. Parenting is hard work, and it’s okay to need help to raise your child in the best way possible!

Psychologists Warn: 90% of Americans Have Inflation-Related Anxiety

October 7, 2022 by Kristen Lawrence

A recent American Psychiatric Association (APA) poll found that inflation anxiety reached an all-time high. According to the findings, about 90% of United States residents reported feeling anxious or highly anxious about inflation. That represents an increase of eight percentage points from May 2022.

In addition to inflation anxiety, the poll found that more than half (51%) of Americans feel concerned about losing income. Groups that reported worrying the most about potential income loss included Hispanic adults (66%), mothers (65%), millennials (63%), and Gen Zers (62%).

“The economy seems to have supplanted COVID as a major factor in Americans’ day-to-day anxiety,” APA President Rebecca Brendel, MD, J.D., said in a news release.

Morning Consult conducted the poll between June 18 and 20, 2022, and surveyed 2,210 adults.

One positive finding from the poll was that fewer Americans felt anxious about the pandemic. The survey showed that COVID-related anxiety decreased from 49% to 47% among all Americans since May. In addition, pandemic worries declined among Black Americans by 16% during that timeframe.

Concerns about money and inflation have replaced COVID as Americans struggle to make ends meet. Another July 2022 survey revealed that many Americans have cut back on spending to pay bills. According to a U.S. News & World Reports survey, about 81% of Americans have adjusted their budgets due to inflation.

Americans Have Found Creative Ways to Fight Inflation

While declining gas prices have slightly eased the pain of inflation, food and energy prices remain high. The national survey revealed a few ways consumers have managed to combat rising costs. Some respondents said electronic coupons helped with sticker shock at grocery stores.

According to the survey:

More than half of Americans (58%) search for coupons at least once weekly.
Three in four Americans (76%) have looked for digital coupons while grocery shopping.
Half of Americans (51%) follow couponing social media and blog accounts. 87% reported using advice from those accounts to save money.
25% use digital coupons at least once a month.
54% of Americans said they used gas-price comparison apps to find the cheapest gas prices near them.

“Our latest survey makes it clear Americans are flocking to digital coupons and similar digital money-saving tools because of inflation’s impact to their wallets,” said Alexandra Kelly, senior editor at U.S. News & World Report’s 360 Deals, in a press statement.

Despite finding ways to cope with rising costs, financial stress has become a heavy burden for many. With inflation at a 40-year high, most Americans worry about an uncertain economic future.

“Stress is not good for health, mental or physical. So, while it’s a reality that Americans are faced with finding ways of making ends meet, it’s more important than ever to make sure that we are all accessing the care that we need,” said Brendel in an interview with Medscape Medical News.

Other Tips on Dealing With Inflation Anxiety

Scouring the internet for coupons can provide control over the economy and keep more money in your wallet. However, that doesn’t address the emotional toll of living in such turbulent economic and political times. Hopefully, the tips below can take some weight off your shoulders and help put things into perspective.

Ask friends and family for support. If you feel overwhelmed about the state of the world, lean on your loved ones for comfort. We can’t expect to carry the world on our shoulders, so don’t feel ashamed to ask for help.

Sadly, the APA survey found that Gen Zers felt the least comfortable talking openly about their feelings. Only 29% said they would turn to loved ones for support about financial stress. Also, they’re less likely than millennials to speak to a therapist about their feelings (28% vs. 38%).

“While many people show resilience, it’s troubling that most Americans wouldn’t speak openly about their feelings after a traumatic event,” APA CEO and Medical Director Saul Levin, MD, said in the news release.

“In many ways, naming feelings is the most important step toward healing, and this reluctance to air our thoughts may indicate that mental health stigma is still a powerful force in our society,” Levin said.

Practice self-care. Thankfully, many Americans (42%) said they engaged in some form of self-care to cope with inflation anxiety. Meditation, yoga, aromatherapy, a warm bath, or even cooking your favorite meal all constitute self-care. Sometimes, we have to tune out the world, put our phones on silent, and make ourselves the priority. Remember, self-care doesn’t make you selfish — it makes you human!
Speak to a mental health professional. Always remember that you don’t have to solve every problem yourself. We didn’t come into this world alone, so we shouldn’t expect to carry all its burdens. No man is an island, after all — we need each other for support and basic survival. A therapist or psychologist can listen and offer helpful advice when you need it the most.

Final Thoughts on How to Cope with Inflation Anxiety

When the inflation rate skyrocketed, many people had the rug pulled out from under them. Most young adults have never experienced such severe inflation and understandably felt anxious about rising prices. An APA survey found that 90% of Americans feel stressed about the economy. Hispanic adults, mothers, and younger generations worry the most about income loss.

While the financial outlook may seem grim, remember that you have some control over the situation. Utilizing coupons when available, cooking at home more, and taking advantage of government aid programs can help ease the burden of inflation. Also, don’t hesitate to seek emotional support from loved ones, therapists, and even your pets!

Take one day at a time, and focus only on what you can change. Keep yourself rooted in the present moment and take a deep breath. The world may seem scary at the moment, but always remember that it’s just one chapter in the story. It isn’t the whole journey, so keep your head up!

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