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Counselors Explain the Five Stages of Divorce Grief

Are you trying to muddle through the heartbreak of a divorce? It is critical to understand the stages of divorce to help your heart heal.

While marriage isn’t nearly as revered as it once was, it still holds value. Plus, it’s an important step that couples make. Some people take that step because they love each other and want to build something with their partner. Others rush into it. But that doesn’t change the fact that many people still value the idea of getting married.

The only problem is that divorce rates are higher than ever. And while a divorce is necessary to ensure people do not stay in unhappy or unsafe situations, it doesn’t mean that it does not affect people. After vowing that you’ll be with someone forever, not having them in your life can be hard to imagine. So, going through all the stages of divorce, grief can seem inconceivable.

Divorce symbolizes the loss of your life as you knew it. You end one chapter, and even if you’re preparing to start another, it doesn’t feel like you’re progressing. It feels like you gave up all your happiness, and you will never find it again. When you get divorced, it feels like you are letting go of the love of your life. And even though that’s probably not true, you have no way of knowing that at that moment.

Even if you get divorced for the right reasons, you still experience a loss. True, the person you are divorcing isn’t dead, but they’re out of your life, or they’ll never be in your life like they used to be. So, it’s only natural to go through a period of grief right after a divorce. But how does this grief manifest? And how can you get over it and allow yourself to heal?

The Five Stages of Divorce Grief

stages of divorce

Grief goes through the same stages in almost all instances. The only thing that differs is how these stages manifest. But the steps you go through when you lose someone are the same as those you go through after a divorce. While there is no way of comparing these experiences, psychologists still found that you can categorize them differently.

1.      Denial

Whenever a life-changing event happens, the first thing you feel is denial. That doesn’t necessarily mean that you refuse to acknowledge the truth, though that might be a part of it. In most cases, you might rationally understand what’s happening but cannot process those emotions. This occurs because the brain often cannot deal with a change that big and that sudden in a short time frame.

So, it denies reality to shield itself from all the grief, anger, and hurt it knows it will have to feel. You have probably gone through this stage, even if you haven’t gone through a divorce. What you think when you are in the denial stage of your divorce is similar to what you’d feel when going through a breakup. A divorce is a breakup but with some added legal steps if you think about it. So, you are probably familiar with how denial feels.

In this stage of the divorce, you’ll keep telling yourself that your partner was not serious about wanting to separate. That they’ll eventually realize divorce is not the answer and come back. Even if you initiated the divorce, you could still go through the denial stage. There’s not much you can do about this stage other than staying rational and letting go of any hope. It will only make you feel worse if you hold on to the idea that your partner might come back, and they don’t.

2.      Anger

After a few days or maybe a few weeks, you’ll come to terms with this divorce, and there’s nothing you can do to prevent it. Once you stop being in denial, the most natural next step is to feel anger. You start to realize that your life will fundamentally change, making you mad. This stage can become very pronounced, especially if you have been deceived or lied to by your partner.

Even if anger is not a positive emotion, it’s natural to feel this way. When you get married to someone, you give them all your trust, and you never expect them to turn on you. So, when that divorce happens, your trust gets broken by the person who was supposed to protect you the most. Anger is natural, but you must be careful regarding how you express it.

In this stage, it’s essential to communicate with people who are close to you and can keep you in check. Many people in this stage of divorce turn to destructive behaviors to feel better. Some people turn to drugs and alcohol because they feel betrayed.

You might feel irritation, frustration, and a lot of anxiety. You’ll have many unanswered questions that could haunt you. It would help if you learned to let go of all these worries and always have someone you can talk to when you feel things are getting too harsh.

3.      Bargaining

When people reach the bargaining stage, they have let go of their anger but still haven’t let go of hope. Even if you are sure that the divorce will happen, you’ll still try everything to get your life back. Even if divorce is the best thing for both of you, change is something that the brain wants to avoid at all costs.

So, you’ll try to say or do the right thing to get your partner back. You might even make promises you know you can’t keep, hoping you’ll get back together. This stage of divorce is more harmful than people give it credit for. Because of this stage, people accept staying in toxic situations even though they know they deserve better. Parents might bargain to remain married for the sake of their children even if they know it’s a bad idea.

Someone who cheated on their partner might feel guilty and promise never to do it again if forgiven. Some people might even try negotiating with whatever higher being they believe in. Whatever trade they can do, whatever promise they can make, they’ll try to make it. Again, to get past this stage, you need to have a robust support system that can keep you in check.

stages of divorce

4.      Depression

Naturally, someone going through a divorce will go through a stage of depression at some point. After seeing that anger and bargaining don’t help you, you’ll start to feel the emotional toll of the separation. Ending a marriage is never easy, and it will make you feel sad, lonely, and even isolated. The truth is that, no matter how social you are, once you get married, you start devoting most of your time to that one person.

So, when that person disappears, you can feel like you’re all alone in the world. Depression can also stem from guilt, believing that you didn’t do everything you could to save the marriage. When going through this stage of divorce, you might want to isolate yourself from the world. Simply getting out of bed could feel like too much.

These feelings are valid, and you need to allow yourself to feel them. But the most important thing you need to keep in mind is that you need to communicate how you feel. Don’t push your friends and family away. And if you feel like you can’t talk to them, you could always reach out to a specialist.

5.      Acceptance

The fifth stage of divorce is acceptance. This stage won’t hit you suddenly. Instead, acceptance is something that will come in bits and pieces. One day, you’ll wake up and feel better, a little more at peace. That feeling might not last, and on other days you might feel like the world is crashing down.

But there’s one main difference between this stage and the others: you’ve finally come to terms with the fact that the marriage is over. Even though you’ll have ups and downs, you’ll know that you’ll be alright in your heart. In this stage, you will let go of any false hope. You’ll let go of anger and understand that what’s most important is to move forward. You’ll want to get your life back on track.

This could mean going out more, watching what you eat, or working out. It could mean finally finding the power to get out of bed and make sure your house is in order. Slowly, day by day, you’ll get better until your marriage is just a memory. Your heart will heal, and you’ll even find that you’ll allow yourself to fall in love again.

stages of divorce

Final Thoughts on the Five Stages of Divorce Grief

The end of a marriage (and most breakups, for that matter) is something that’ll change your life forever. Even if no one dies, you’ll still have to bury your past and start a completely new chapter. The grief you feel when your partner leaves and the grief you feel when you lose a loved one for good are very similar. And it even has the same five stages.

The five stages of a divorce are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These stages don’t have to come in this order, but they usually do. Either way, you’ll feel all these emotions when coming to terms with your divorce. The most important thing you need to remember is that you need to keep your friends and family close no matter how you feel.

You need to make sure you have a robust support system to ensure you don’t shatter to pieces. When you go through something so traumatic, you can be very vulnerable. Because of this, it’s not uncommon to develop toxic coping mechanisms, like drinking. But when you are surrounded by people you can rely on, you can feel safe. Communicating can become your coping mechanism, and you’ll get through everything healthily.

20 Unsafe Foods That Contain Petroleum and Toxins

When you’re at the grocery store, it’s easy to convince yourself that everything on the shelf is safe. You assume that harmful ingredients aren’t in favorite snacks and that it’s okay to treat your children to these items. However, this isn’t the truth, as many of these items are unsafe foods, containing petroleum and other toxins.

Many of our favorite snacks contain unhealthy ingredients, including petroleum. Research shows that these unhealthy foods link to mental and physical health issues. Even with science backing the problems, the federal government still allows it to be in food.

Petroleum products can cause cancer, behavior disorders, and other health concerns. Since the ingredient is in food that won’t decompose, it’s a sure sign that it makes for unsafe foods.

What Is Petroleum?

Petroleum is an oil that runs your car, powers planes, and lubricates heavy machinery. It is used in computers, clothes, cleaning products, bottles, containers, and other objects. Petroleum is also found in lotion, shampoo, makeup, and other beauty items.

This ingredient is used so often because it prevents them from becoming rancid. The only reason it can stop things from going bad is that it isn’t truly food. However, this supposed benefit can have detrimental effects on your health.

Petroleum is known as mineral oil in the food industry, and many manufacturers claim that it’s safe to consume. However, some scientists state the opposite and show that you should avoid unsafe foods.

unsafe foods

How to Find Petroleum and Other Toxins on a Food Label

It’s sometimes hard to determine if your favorite foods contain petroleum. Manufacturers often list it differently, making it hard to identify. As you read food labels, look for the following ingredients:

  • tert-butylhydroquinone (TBHQ)
  • tertiary butylhydroquinone (TBHQ)
  • butylated hydroxyanisole (BHA)
  • methyl benzoate
  • ethyl methylphenidate
  • blue 1
  • blue 2
  • yellow 5
  • yellow 6
  • red 40
  • Mineral oil

Unsafe Foods That Contain Petroleum and Toxins

Avoid consuming these things.

1. Fruit Snacks

The same of this snack might fool you because it doesn’t often contain fruit. Most fruit snacks have Red 3, a food coloring with petroleum. Red 3 is considered a carcinogen as it links to cancer.

The snacks get their fruity flavor from added ingredients instead of the real food. Red 3 is banned from being used in cosmetics because it is associated with thyroid tumors. You shouldn’t be eating it if you can’t use it on your skin, and it’s something to keep in mind.

Fruit snacks aren’t the only gummy food to avoid. Any sugary or sticky snacks with false claims of containing fruit are likely unsafe foods.

2. Graham Cracker Bears

Graham cracker bears are an easy and delicious snack, but they are on the list of unhealthy foods. They’ve existed for decades, leaving many people assuming they’re healthy. However, they are full of petroleum in the form of TBHQ, a toxic ingredient common in foods.

TBHQ can cause problems such as vomiting, ringing in your ear, weakness or collapse, and delirium. Studies show that it can also cause cancer and damage cells. It can also cause restlessness, anxiety, and worsening ADHD symptoms in kids.

Regularly eating this snack and others with TBHQ can have lasting effects. It poses dangerous health risks that you could avoid by making better nutritional choices.

3. Snack Cakes

These snack cakes are fun and sometimes delicious, but they are one of the most unsafe foods you can consume. Many of them contain TBHQ, preventing oxidation or spoilage. While it can stay on your shelf longer, it won’t promote a healthy lifestyle or make you feel good.

Processed snack cakes also contain saturated fat, sodium, carbs, and sugar. Plus, there are very few nutrients in these products.

4. Candy Coated Chocolates

This chocolate candy contains Blue 1, Blue 2, Yellow 5, Yellow 6, and Red 40, all derived from petroleum. It can increase your cancer risk because they are carcinogens. They can cause hyperactivity in kids, too, so parents will want to remember this one. Additionally, these harmful ingredients can also damage DNA and cause allergic reactions.

5. Mac and Cheese Dinners

Kraft dinners are a popular option for families because they are convenient and quick. Plus, children love them, but these dinners can be detrimental to your health. Kraft dinners contain artificial dyes with petroleum.

6. Chewing Gum

You don’t swallow chewing gum, but you consume the ingredients anyway. Many chewing gums contain Butylated hydroxyanisole and Tertiary butylhydroquinone. It also often has Tocopherol, another chemical compound.

7. Cooking Oil

Petroleum preserves cooking oils, and you’ll commonly find TBHQ in unsaturated vegetable oils and animal fats. These ingredients allow cooking oil to maintain the flavor or odor of the foods you use it in. They also ensure the oil doesn’t become discolored.

Vegetable oils, including peanut and soybean oil, commonly contain TBHQ. Fish oil also has TBHQ. However, palm and walnut oils include BHA, BHT, and PG.

8. Potato Chips in a Can

While stacked chips in a can are a yummy snack, they’re one of the most unsafe foods. The spicy variations and the pizza flavor are full of petroleum-based toxins. It is linked to attention problems and is a carcinogen, meaning it could cause cancer.

9. Thin Wheat Crackers

Many people consider thin wheat crackers a healthy snack, but that’s far from the truth. They are highly processed, containing canola oil and refined sugar. Wheat thins have even been banned in some countries because they contain BHT.

10. Cheese Square Crackers

When you eat cheese squares, you consume flour, oil, and a little cheese. The oil contains TBHQ to increase the shelf life. The color of the crackers makes you think it’s cheese, but the color comes from the paprika used in the recipe.

toxins

11. Crispy Fried Cheese Snacks

This cheesy orange snack has become increasingly popular due to social media videos that show unique ways to use these crispy, cheesy snacks.. However, it’s best to ignore these tips because these are unsafe food. They contain yellow 6, methyl benzoate, and ethyl methylphenidate.

12. Ramen Noodles

Many people turn to ramen noodles because they are cheap, quick, and easy to prepare. However, these so-called benefits cause you to consume toxic ingredients. It’s not worth saving money when it can cause severe health issues.

Ramen noodles are full of sodium and preservatives, including TBHQ. The TBHQ isn’t digestible and offers no benefit to your body.

13. Frozen Waffles

Frozen waffles contain dyes, soy, and oil, making them a health risk. They may also contain GMOs, and the long-term effects are unknown. Your best bet is to make homemade waffles in big batches to heat up throughout the week.

14. Fast Food

Fast food is often the most unsafe food you can choose. Some fast food items contain TBHQ, including Taco Bell’s Doritos Locos Taco Shells.

Additionally, some restaurants use caramel coloring. The caramel coloring gives chili, barbecue sauce, oatmeal, and other items a darker color. Some of the caramel colorings contain 4-methylimidazole, a potential carcinogen. It also comes from wheat or dairy and could trigger food allergies.

15. Sandwich Crackers

Crackers are an easy snack, making them a popular option for busy people and parents. However, many sandwich crackers contain TBHQ as a preservative. Not only can it cause cancer, but it can also disturb vision.

16. Chicken Nuggets

Children tend to favor chicken nuggets over other foods, but they should only be an occasional treat. They contain TBHQ and other harmful toxins and additives. Then, if you or your child like to dip your nuggets, the sauce likely contains more toxins and other harmful ingredients.

17. Microwave Popcorn

Some microwave popcorn contains TBHQ and palm oil, making it an unhealthy snack. Plus, it can contain high amounts of salt and fat.

18. Breakfast Toaster Pastries

Often used as a breakfast food, breakfast pastries you pop into the toaster are highly unhealthy. They contain artificial dyes, synthetic additives, and tons of harmful sugar. They can cause sugar addiction, liver problems, and diabetes.

19. Cooking Spray

TBHQ is used to offer a longer shelf life as it stops and prevents deterioration. Research shows that sesame oil for cooking spray becomes unhealthier as it heats up. It also passes the harmful ingredients to the foods you fry in it.

20. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

This candy isn’t allowed at some whole foods and health stores. It contains TBHQ, making it one of many unhealthy foods. Reese’s peanut butter cups contain other chemical preservatives, too, furthering the detriment to your health.

What to Eat Instead

After reading about these unhealthy foods, you’re likely wondering what’s safe to eat. You can choose from many easy and quick healthy snacks, even when you’re in a hurry.

Keep organic fruit and vegetables on hand, and opt for homemade snacks. You can make a large batch of granola bars using fruit, nuts, and other healthy ingredients. Finding recipes online is simple, so look for recipes for alternatives to your favorite snacks.

Preparing food at home ensures you know the ingredients without deciphering a label. Aim for organic ingredients whenever you can, as you will encounter fewer toxins. Some foods labeled as organic have hidden ingredients, though, so don’t forget to check the label.

unsafe foods

Final Thoughts on Unsafe Foods That Contain Petroleum and Other Toxins

You want to live a healthy life and provide your family with the best foods, but many hidden ingredients are unhealthy. Don’t keep buying these unhealthy foods, and turn to homemade or organic foods.

Once you switch out your unhealthy favorites with better options, you’ll find new staples in your diet. Plus, you’ll feel better knowing that you and your family are healthier.

15 Things That Suggest You Had a Past Life

Reincarnation is a subject that we can no longer ignore. How does one explain a child who claims to have been here before and knows things that aren’t possible? What about odd feelings, unsettling dreams, and being able to speak languages you’ve never learned before? All these things indicate a strong connection that your past life is spilling over into your current one.

Fifteen Signs You’ve Had A Past Life.

Maybe you’ve experienced unexplainable things and believe you were from another time and place. Perhaps, you’ve kept these things to yourself for fear of feeling judged or that you would look silly. Here are some signs that indicate a person has lived and walked this earth before, and you may find that many of them resonate with you.

past life

1. Déjà Vu Might Show a Past Life

Déjà Vu is an unexplainable feeling that is hard to put into words. You may have instincts or be disoriented by a smell, taste, or sound. Did you know that more than 60-70 percent of people experience this transient state at least once in their life, according to the Cleveland Clinic?

Take, for instance, a woman visiting the great Titanic exhibit in the Smokey Mountains. She doesn’t understand what’s happening, but suddenly she feels like she’s choking. She feels like water is filling her lungs, making breathing impossible.

Then, she sees an exhibit with memorabilia pulled from the wreckage, and she instantly knows one of the pieces is hers. There’s no way to describe these feelings and no way to justify why she knows an artifact is hers that she’s never seen.

2. Unexplained Phobias

Having a phobia or irrational fear is not uncommon. According to Johns Hopkins Medicine, over nineteen million Americans suffer from this mental health concern. Take, for instance, arachnophobia. The fear of spiders may develop after being bitten and having an anaphylactic reaction to the bite.

Consequently, when a person develops a phobia without any trauma or verifiable connections, it can signify something that happened in a past life. Could you have been here before and suffered from a trauma affecting your present life?

3. Understanding Foreign Languages

Xenoglossy is a phenomenon that allows you to speak, read, write, or understand languages that are not familiar. It frequently happened in Biblical times, such as on the day of Pentecost in Acts 2:1-38. Though, it’s a modern-day occurrence too.

If you can suddenly understand another language in some capacity, it can signify that you’ve been here before. Could your previous lives be coming through into your present one?

4. Unexplained Pains

Everyone will experience some physical pain at some point or another. Consequently, when you’ve pains with no medical explanation, it could be your past life coming back to remind you of an occurrence. Many people undergo past life regression to understand their pains when nothing else makes sense.

Take, for example, a lady who kept having chronic discomfort in her shoulders and arms. Through regression treatment, she discovered that a bear once attacked her, and it caused her untimely death. The soul took those pains from the attack with her into the next life.

5. Reincarnation May Cause a Current Life Fascination with History

Some folks are natural history buffs, and they don’t even need to study to get an “A” on their test. Could this be a sign that they’ve lived in another time and place, and history fascinates them because it connects them to their other life?

6. Persistent Dreams

Your dreams tell you many things, but the biggest thing is that your brain is trying to process something that happened in your past. It can be a significant sign that you have a past life, especially when things in the dream seem odd yet familiar, and it’s as if you’ve been to this place or experienced this event before. A solid historical knowledge can mean you have a connection to the past.

7. Strong Intuition Might Come from Your Past Life

Can you predict events long before they happen? Those who have a solid intuitive side could be because of a link to their past. It’s believed that when you have past lives and experiences, you learn and grow from these events. These things allow you to have wisdom and enhance your intuitive nature.

reincarnation

8. Reincarnation Can Cause Fascination with a Specific Era

A past life can cause an affinity for folks who lived in another time frame. These kinships can also be for a particular world area, like Ancient Rome. There are no logical explanations for these fascinations or feelings, but you know there’s some connection between you and another time and place.

9. Gender Identity Questions

Is it possible that those who suffer from gender identity issues have been reincarnated? Experts in reincarnation often believe that the gender of a person is decided by the period in which a person lives. So, if you feel a draw to be a nurse, it’s possible you were a woman in the time frame when women were predominantly nurses.

Dr. Stevenson is renowned for his analyses of reincarnation; many of the things he uncovered are phenomenal. According to an article published by Scientific Studies, an odd occurrence happened to a little girl with a birthmark around her inner thigh. She often complained to her parents about missing Japan, even though she’d never been there.

She preferred masculine things and wanted manly clothing as she grew. After some past life regression, she discovered that she was a soldier in a previous life, and the birthmark was where she was shot and killed.

10. You Feel Like a Stranger in a Strange Land

Do you feel like the world around you seems odd, and you’re out of place? Everything feels weird to you. This can be a sign that you’ve lived before. Did you know that some folks believe that people reincarnate from other planets, so it’s only natural that these folks would view the current world differently?

11. Out of Place Memories Might Reveal a Past Life

Your memories are an essential part of who you are as a person. If you didn’t have your memory, you wouldn’t recall family or events that have happened to you. However, when you have memories of things that don’t fit your current life, it can be a sign that you remember something that happened to you in a past one.

12. No Connection with Your Parents

Many people don’t have good relationships with their parents, which doesn’t mean anything. Oddly, weak parental bonds can tell that you long for parents you haven’t seen in years, decades, or centuries.

You can’t feel at home with your current parents because your soul longs for other parents that were special to you. If you died young and were reincarnated, this could answer these strange feelings and the loss of connections. Maybe, the person who feels disconnected from family has another explanation.

13. You Have a Soulmate

Ironically, finding your soulmate can be part of your past life. A soul connection might mean that you were connected to this individual long ago. People who meet, fall in love fast, and are destined to be together, might find that they have a past life that carries into their current life.

14. Birthmarks May Indicate a Past Life

Birthmarks are not that spectacular in and of themselves. Reincarnation and birthmarks have a strong link. One specific case was a boy with a birthmark on his chest that was quite large. After speaking with the child, Stevenson found that the boy believed he was shot in a previous life, and the birthmark was merely the exact area the bullet entered his body.

How can this be true? Some folks would say that the child watched too much television, but it’s hard to refute when a kid with no knowledge of such things tells you of their previous life.

15. You’re Well Beyond Your Years

Do people refer to you as an “old soul” because you don’t fit with today’s modern society? This can be a sign of reincarnation and a past life. If you’ve been reincarnated several times, you may have a deeper understanding of things that you would have no way of understanding in your current realm. Your old lives may be spilling over into the present one.

past life

Final Thoughts on Signs of a Past Life

Many people question whether reincarnation and past lives are real, but it’s no different than believing in God or Baal as you go on your gut instincts and believe. When it comes to this phenomenon, there is medical and psychological proof that there are things one cannot explain.

In ancient writings from India, Greece, and the Celtic Druids, the occurrences that may reveal reincarnation go back more than 3,000 years. If you’ve experienced anything listed above, it can indicate that you’ve been here before, and things from your previous life firmly grip you.

15 Causes of Evening Leg Cramps

Leg cramps are a harmless and common condition where your leg muscles suddenly get painfully tight. Most people experience this in their calf muscles, but it can happen in any part of your leg or feet. Sometimes, after the cramp gets better, you’ll still feel a soreness in the cramping area. Many people complain of leg cramps during the night.

Why is this situation called a charlie horse?

The painful, sudden muscle spasm you get in your legs is called a charlie horse. This name originated from a Hall of Fame baseball player, Charlie “Old Hoss” Radbourn, who experienced frequent leg cramps while playing in the 1880s. The nickname caught on with fans and has gained favor ever since.

Fifteen Causes of Leg Cramps and How to Fix Them

Some of these are surprising.

leg cramps

1 – Muscle overuse and lack of recovery time

Nighttime Charlie horses could indicate you’re overdoing it at the gym. Strenuous exercises put extra stress on your muscles. You may not allow your muscles enough time to rest between high-intensity workouts. High-intensity workouts create lots of tiny tears in your muscles. As these wounds heal, they cause your muscles to get stronger. Not allowing enough time for your muscles to recover adds stress, leading to leg cramps. If you enjoy working out, give your body time to repair and rest. This should eliminate the nighttime leg cramps.

2 – Dehydration causes leg cramps

Your body comprises 60% water. You must constantly replenish your body fluids throughout the day, especially if it’s hot outside or exercising. Leg cramps at night are often because of dehydration. Increase your water intake if you’re outside in hot weather, exercising a lot, and not drinking enough. You may want to drink an electrolyte drink that contains extra potassium. These can help replenish essential minerals lost through dehydration, so the Charlie horse disappears.

3 – Nerve damage

Nighttime leg cramps could be a symptom of early-onset diseases, such as nervous system disorders such as Parkinson’s disease. Nerve damage can also occur because of a car accident or other injury in sports. Some infections can lead to nerve damage and cause leg cramps. Discuss it with your doctor if you’re experiencing painful nighttime Charlie horses. They can do tests to determine if any of these reasons could cause nerve damage.

4 – Pregnancy often causes leg cramping

Leg cramping is common during pregnancy. This is because of all your body’s circulatory changes, especially in the second and third trimesters. Cramping may also be because of the stress on your muscles as your stomach grows. Exercising while pregnant is safe if you don’t strain your muscles. Exercise helps you control your weight and strengthen muscles over the months. Be sure to drink water to stay hydrated.

5 – Certain medications cause cramping

Some medications cause evening discomfort. They usually list these side effects on the medicines. Statin medication, taken to help treat high cholesterol, is one of the most common medications that may cause cramping side effects. Other drugs that may cause leg cramps to include the following:

  • Zyrtec
  • Aleve
  • Lyrica
  • Zoloft
  • Wellbutrin
  • Celebrex
  • Xopenex
  • Combivent

6 – Fatigue

If you’re exhausted and not sleeping enough, it takes a toll on your body. Rest allows your muscles time to rest and recover. You may not get enough sleep if you’re having leg cramps at night. You may be overly tired, and it’s showing up through cramping at night. Attempt to get at least 7 hours of sleep every night. Take time to rest your body and mind. You should notice a change in fewer leg cramps.

7 – Cirrhosis can cause leg cramps

Liver disease causes leg cramps. Cirrhosis is the scarring of your liver because of lifestyle choices like alcoholism or an infection. Although the liver can regenerate itself, permanent damage can occur. If you have liver disease, you may experience chronic leg cramps because of the medications used to treat this condition. If the cramping worsens, talk to your doctor about ways to find relief.

8 – Chronic kidney disease

People with chronic kidney disease (CKD) are prone to leg cramps. CKD erodes your kidney function so that toxins build up in your blood. The CKD mineral and chemical imbalances cause nighttime leg cramps and spasms. These may be because of the medications for CKD, so speak with your doctor about your cramping, and they can adjust your medications to help you ease the cramping.

cramping

9 – Age impacts evening leg cramps

As you age, you’re more prone to leg cramps. Older muscles get tired and are sensitive to fluid changes, leading to dehydration and leg cramps. Women are more prone to leg cramps as they age than men. One study found that older people in better shape were less apt to experience nighttime leg cramps. As you age, you must stay in shape with exercise and healthy eating. These things associated with nighttime leg cramps predicted less severe cramps that didn’t interrupt sleep.

10 – Peripheral artery disease

Individuals with circulation disorders are prone to nighttime leg cramps. This condition causes narrowing of your arteries, reducing blood circulation. People with PAD often have cold extremities, numbness, or weakness in their feet and legs. If you have PAD, be sure to get exercise to aid your circulation to your extremities. Speak to your doctor about your cramping to see what else you can do to ease the pain of nighttime leg cramps.

11 – Anemia might trigger cramping of the legs

Anemia affects your body’s ability to produce hemoglobin, a protein found in red blood cells. This protein carries oxygen to all of your body. If you’re low in hemoglobin, you’ll be anemic. You may need treatments to improve the oxygen flow in your body. They usually do this with medications such as iron supplements or infusions if your anemia is terrible. Anemia’s side effects are nighttime leg cramps. If you’re experiencing leg cramps at night for no apparent reason, get tested for anemia. Other symptoms of anemia include:

  • Fatigue
  • Pale skin
  • Weakness
  • Headache
  • Dizziness
  • Cold feet and hands
  • Headaches
  • Brittle nails
  • Shortness of breath
  • Chest pain

12 – Diuretics

Taking diuretics puts you at a higher risk for leg cramps. Individuals with high blood pressure often take diuretics. This medication helps reduce the fluid around your heart, which drops your blood pressure. Although diuretics are helpful, they have side effects like nighttime leg cramps. They can cause a fluid imbalance in your body, causing you to become dehydrated. If you’re taking diuretics, monitor them to keep the proper water balance in your body. Usually, a simple change to your diuretic will eliminate your nighttime cramping.

13 – Too high cortisol levels

Cortisol is sometimes called the “stress hormone.” That’s because cortisol aids your body when dealing with stress, like infections and other stressful situations you experience. It’s usually highest in the morning but drops off at night so that you can fall asleep. If your life is incredibly stressful for a season, it can make your body produce an oversupply of cortisol. This causes you to be in a constant, stressful response. You can’t sleep and feel jittery and anxious all day. The high levels of cortisol at night cause cramping. Try to lower your stress levels during the day by following these practices:

  • Take frequent breaks
  • Avoid drinking too much caffeine
  • Exercise to help reduce your stress levels
  • Get enough sleep
  • Try yoga or meditation to relax

As your cortisol levels drop off, the Charlie horse should go away. If not, speak with your doctor about ways to help get relief.

14. Ill-fitted shoes

You can have a charlie horse when your shoes don’t fit correctly. Walking around all day at work or school with poor-fitting shoes puts stress on your legs and feet. Too tight shoes or too high heels press on the nerves of your feet and legs. If you’re experiencing nighttime muscle discomfort, changing your shoes for several weeks is worth seeing if that helps them go away. Choose shoes with support and comfort rather than stylish, uncomfortable shoes. They may look cute during the day, but the pain at night isn’t worth it.

15 –  Seasons changing may trigger leg cramps

Did you know that a Charlie horse is more common in certain seasons? Indeed, they are more common in the summer, usually peaking in July. Studies show that complaints of leg cramps almost double in the summer. It’s unclear exactly why this happens, but it could be because nerve repair and growth are most active in the summer because of exposure to more vitamin D from the sun exposure. So, your body is speeding up doing these repairs, which triggers leg cramps.

leg cramps

Final Thoughts on the Causes and Fixes for Evening Leg Cramps

A Charlie horse is harmless but can be painful to deal with. They may disrupt your sleep and cause tenderness for hours afterward. If you suffer from leg cramps, check out these fifteen causes to see if one could be why you’re getting a charlie horse at night.

12 Behaviors That Reveal a Disrespectful Child

A disrespectful child can be hard to deal with, and raising kids to show respect is even harder when you don’t realize it’s happening right away. The sooner you can handle the behavior, the better you can correct it. Recognizing the behaviors helps you start the process and determine what to do next.

Before you become a parent, you don’t envision raising a child who behaves disrespectfully. Unfortunately, it can happen anyway, and it’s up to you to address. Raising kids is hard, and you shouldn’t beat yourself up if you find yourself in this situation.

You might wonder if your child’s behavior stems from something else. However, acknowledge that the underlying issue is disrespect. If your child exhibits any of these behaviors, it’s a sure sign that you must make a change to help a disrespectful child.

The Difference Between Normal Rebellion and Raising Kids Who Show Respect

Children go through rebellious stages, and it doesn’t always mean they’re disrespectful. There is a difference between this normal part of life and crossing the line to unacceptable behavior.

The best way to tell the difference is by asking yourself if your child is expressing frustration or being hurtful. If they are only complaining about life’s challenges, it’s likely just rebellion. However, it has crossed over if they are saying condescending things or being abusive.

Another way to think of this is to consider how your child behaves when they get scolded. If your child rolls their eyes or stomps up the stairs, it’s rebellion. When it turns into name-calling, it’s disrespect, and it’s up to the adult in this situation to draw the line.

disrespectful child

Twelve Behaviors of a Disrespectful Child

Many behaviors reveal a disrespectful child, and knowing the signs is the first step. Recognizing and addressing the issues is key to raising kids who behave positively.

1. A Disrespectful Child Won’t Follow the Rules

All kids break the rules sometimes but making it a habit indicates disrespect. A disrespectful child might act like the rules don’t apply to them, even with reminders.

Most kids understand that the rules are in place to avoid potential consequences. Disrespectful kids either don’t care or think that someone else will fix the problem and shield them from the fall out.

2. They Won’t Do Chores

Kids have plenty of time to help out around the house, and it’s a sign of disrespect if they refuse. When you ask them to pick up their room, they should at least attempt. If your child refuses to do chores when you ask, it likely stems from a place of entitlement.

Kids can do chores from a young age, and it’s up to the caregiver to implement good habits. No matter how old your child is, teach them to clean up after themselves. Even toddlers can learn about picking up toys and putting them away.

3. They Talk to You Like You’re a Peer

If your child talks to you like they would talk to a peer, it’s not a good sign. You might think it shows a level of comfort, but it indicates a lack of respect. They might speak dismissively or assume they hold the same power in the family as you do.

4. They Lash Out When You Say “No”

Kids don’t like to be told no, but it must happen sometimes. If your child lashes out when they don’t get their way, it’s a sure sign of disrespect. It shows a lack of coping skills and signifies an entitled child.

Disrespectful kids might react in a mean way or be overly dramatic. Don’t be afraid to put your foot down, and trust that your child will get used to it. They might not handle it well at first, but the more they hear it, the easier it’ll get.

5. A Disrespectful Child Will Often Lack Empathy

It’s a sign of disrespect when a child doesn’t show empathy. They might refuse to make a craft for someone who isn’t feeling well. Or, they might not seem to care about bad things that happen to those around them.

Even small children can display empathy. Watch for a lack of empathy if you think you have a disrespectful child on your hands.

6. They Don’t Use Their Manners

Parents teach their kids to use manners from an early age. It indicates disrespect if you have a child who won’t say please or thank you even when prompted. It shows that they feel entitled to the things people do for them or give them.

7. They Say Rude Things Without Caring About the Result

Kids tend to say the wrong thing, but it doesn’t mean they’re disrespectful. Usually, the child will feel bad afterward or won’t realize they said anything wrong. However, if your child often says rude things and doesn’t care, it’s a sign they’re disrespectful.

Once your child becomes school-aged, this sign is even more prevalent. A disrespectful child might seem unable to identify the time and place to say something or ask a question.

One example of this situation is when a child continually interrupts their parent and demands their attention. Then, when the parent turns to the child, it turns out that what the child had to say could have waited. Another example is when your child shows open disdain for gifts they don’t want.

8. A Disrespectful Child Don’t Care How They Affect Others

It’s a sign of disrespect if a child doesn’t care how their behavior affects others. They might know that their behavior will inconvenience others, and they’ll do it anyway. Sometimes they might not even consider the effect because they don’t care about the outcome.

9. They Manipulate People

A disrespectful child tends to manipulate people to get what they want. The child might tell you that their other parent is better because they let them do whatever they want. They tend to use parents and other adults as pawns, pitting them against one another to get their way.

10. They Believe They Deserve Special Treatment

While you want to make your child feel special, they shouldn’t begin demanding things the others don’t get. When a child starts expecting special treatment, it’s a sign that they’ve become disrespectful.

If your child expects you to make a special meal rather than eating what everyone else eats, it’s not a good sign. Likewise, they don’t often appreciate what they have and keep asking you to give more. They’ll also be unwilling to compromise, wanting everything to be their way.

raising kids

11. They Don’t Offer to Help

A disrespectful child won’t ask if you need help with anything. They should see when you could use a hand and offer to carry something for you. Or, they can hold the door when they see you coming with groceries.

It’s a red flag if your child won’t even do small things to help. Teach your kids to think of others, and they’ll offer to help when they see a need.

12. A Disrespectful Child Might Not Get Along with Their Peers

Disrespectful children don’t always have good friends because they struggle to get along with others. They want everything to go their way and don’t care about the well-being of others, so they have a hard time with friendships.

Raising Kids Who Show Respect to Others

If you identified any signs of disrespect in your child, it’s not too late to get it under control. You can make a few changes to stop the disrespectful behavior.

1. Become an Authoritative Parent of Your Disrespectful Child

Authoritative parents are assertive and help their children develop. They use love and kindness to encourage kids to grow into better people every day.

Research shows that an authoritative parent offers more guidance and advice than other parents. They stay firm while using reasoning to explain things, allowing their children to understand the situation. This parenting style helps their kids make good decisions rather than feeling controlled by a parent.

2. Stop Saving Them from Everything

You want your child to be happy in life, but you can’t save them from everything. When they make a mistake, you must allow them to experience the consequence. Stepping back helps them learn and develop, setting them up for a better future.

3. Don’t Be Their Best Friend

Having a special relationship with your child is a given, but you shouldn’t be their best friend. You don’t want them to talk to you as they do to their friends, so you must set the boundary. It’s more important to be their parent than to put yourself on their level in this way.

4. Call Them Out

Tell your child when they are being disrespectful. Respectfully explain that they are being hurtful and that you won’t put up with it. After a few times of calling them out, you might notice a change in your child.

5. Model Respectful Behavior When Raising Kids to Be Kinder

Even when you don’t realize it, your child watches and learns from you. If you use disrespectful language, call people names, yell at others, or make derogatory remarks, your child will follow suit. Model respectful behavior so that they can do better.

disrespectful child

Final Thoughts on Behaviors That Reveal a Disrespectful Child

Recognizing the behaviors that reveal a disrespectful child can help you determine if you need to make changes in your home. Respect begins at home, and you must teach your child to do better.

Call them out on disrespectful behavior and explain why it’s not okay. Kids understand more than we give them credit for, and they’ll likely get it. Don’t stress if your child is disrespectful because it’s not too late to make a change.

10 Ways to Have Better Mental Discipline

Your mental discipline affects many things in your life. You can’t be full of happiness and success unless you have focus and control over your mind. Imagine you go to a buffet, and you’re overwhelmed by the options and want to eat everything in sight.

While you want to go back two or three times for more food, you know that you will pay later by being sick if you overeat. So, you use self-control to only eat the portions and foods you can without overdoing it.

This is an example that can also be used in your life. When you have mental discipline, you can make informed decisions without giving in to temptation. Sure, it’s not always easy to resist, especially when you’re dealing with comfort foods, but you know that you must stop yourself as it will cause issues.

One of the benefits of developing such control is that, eventually, you won’t be tempted to indulge. You’ll know your perimeters and stay within them without giving it much thought. Though a buffet is just an example, you can use this analogy for many aspects of your life.

Ten Excellent Ways to Have Better Mental Discipline

You won’t let your impulses dictate your actions when you learn not to give in to temptations and exercise your beliefs and boundaries. If you struggle with mental discipline, here are some ways that you can help to strengthen this form of self-control.

mental discipline

1. Develop New Habits When Building Better Mental Discpline

If you want to develop a new habit, you need to allow yourself anywhere from 18-250 days, according to a study from the European Journal of Social Psychology. The new practice will become automatic for most people by the 66th day. So, your new habits will not become a part of your life overnight.

Your habits are actions that have become automatic for you, and you don’t have to stop and think about doing them. For instance, you buckle your safety belt when you get into the car. You don’t realize you’re doing it, and you don’t think about it, but you do it.

The same thing can happen with other aspects of your life. A disciplined brain likes habits because it helps it to function more efficiently. Automated actions help to free up some of your mental resources so that you can focus on other tasks.

2. Eliminate Temptations

If you’ve ever been on a diet, you know that you must remove the temptations from your home to be successful. It’s challenging to develop new eating habits when you have a drawer full of snacks calling your name. When you remove the temptation from your presence, it doesn’t have the same power over you.

Sure, you’re still going to crave and want these things, but if they’re not as easily accessible to you, it makes it harder to get them. If you want a disciplined brain, you must remove the temptations from your path.

3. Always Have a Plan B

If life teaches you anything, it’s that you must be flexible. Things will never go as planned, and you may need to alter your route. So, while you’re making your goals and deciding where you want to be, make sure you have a plan B.

It’s essential that when your device has this backup plan, you don’t think of automatic failure, but you need to be realistic. While you don’t plan on using it, you need the other roadmap for purposeful course correction. Mental discipline will allow for adjustments in your path, but you must keep moving forward no matter your setbacks.

4. Dust Yourself Off When You Stumble

There’s no way you’ll be perfect and never make any mistakes, as it’s unrealistic. The disciplined brain can see that when you make mistakes, it’s all part of the learning process. You must pick yourself up and try again. How many times does an ice skater fall before they learn to do a triple axel?

They certainly don’t start on the ice doing flips and landing perfectly, but it’s a skill they must acquire. They wouldn’t know the proper stance and speed to make the perfect jump if they didn’t fall twice. Don’t expect perfection when changing your mental discipline, but know that you can try again.

5. Define Your Goals and a Plan to Achieve Improved Mental Discipline

If you want to obtain a higher level of self-discipline, you can do so by having a vision for your future. It would help if you had a plan or a roadmap for your life. To start, you must define what success is to you, as it’s different for each person. It’s much easier to get sidetracked when you don’t have a clear destination.

When you take the time to develop a clear plan, each step you make is done with purpose. For instance, you won’t spend that extra money on a new car because your goal is to be debt-free in three years, and a new car won’t fit into the plans. Well-disciplined people know how to stay on track, and they do it by becoming emotionally connected to their journey. It’s easier to see the finish line when you have an emotional connection to your goals.

unrealistic goals

6. Gain Strength from Mentors and Coaches

Remember the story of Anne Sullivan and Helen Keller? A debilitating case of scarlet fever caused Keller to become blind and deaf at only 19 months old. As a young girl, it seemed like her life was over, but Anne Sullivan saw the potential through her darkness.

Under Sullivan’s direction, Keller learned sign language and that everything has a name. Sullivan also taught her how to speak and communicate with the world. The fascinating part of the story is that Sullivan was also legally blind, and she wore dark sunglasses. She lost most of her vision at five years of age from trachoma.

Keller published an autobiography of her journey, but she wouldn’t have been successful if it hadn’t been for her mentor. Everyone needs mentors in life to help them along the way. In contrast, you may not have the challenges of Hellen Keller, but having someone to help you along the way can mean everything in your journey.

7. Identify Your Strengths and Weaknesses

Everyone has a few weaknesses. For some folks, it’s video games and electronics, and for others, it’s junk food. Regardless of your vulnerabilities, the real issue is the amount of control it can have over you. Identifying both your strengths and weaknesses is essential to securing your mental discipline.

You’re not doing yourself any favor if you pretend these weaknesses don’t exist, and you’re causing yourself great harm by living in denial. Never throw your hands up and say, “Whatever!” Instead, you need to realize what you struggle with, and it’s only with the proper mindset that you can overcome them.

8. Alter Your Perceptions

Your beliefs greatly limit you. Perhaps you want to run the 5K in your local town, but you only think you can run two miles, so you don’t sign up. If you don’t believe you can accomplish something, you won’t. Consequently, if you think you can run the race, you will push through. It’s all about willpower and your ability to press through your judgments.

When you develop a mindset of unlimited willpower, you can strengthen your mental toughness. Your internal perceptions about willpower and self-control will help establish your level of discipline. Everyone has subconscious obstacles that stand in their way, but your drive will help motivate you to turn your dreams and goals into a reality.

9. When It Comes to Mental Discipline, Practice Makes Perfect

No one comes into this world with a disciplined brain, but it’s a learned behavior you develop over time. Have you ever watched a ballerina elegantly glide across the floor? They don’t just wake up one day and decide to dance, but they must practice from a young age to develop this skill.

Why are some dancers better than others? It’s all about the amount of time they spend in training, and their focus and discipline play a big part. Sure, these individuals have other things to do, but their self-control drives them to reach their goals. Practice makes perfect, and exercising your self-discipline can get you where you want to be.

10. Realize Your Mind is Weak

Your mind is restricted by rigorous limitations, but your consciousness doesn’t have these constraints. Sometimes, you need to look beyond your mind and realize that you have another energy source from which you can draw strength. There will be days when you feel mentally and physically exhausted and don’t want to keep going. You realize that you must push yourself, as this is what being disciplined is all about.

mental discipline

Final Thoughts on Having Better Mental Discipline

You have the power within you to do anything you set your mind to accomplish. It takes focus, willpower, and determination to have the mental discipline you desire. Developing a disciplined brain isn’t an easy process, but it’s worth the effort.

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