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17 Things You’ll Miss About Being Single

New love is exciting, and it’s the stuff that fairy tales are made of. But, what about all those single days? Though you enjoy having someone to share your life with, there are plenty of things that you will miss about having some alone time.

Seventeen Things People in Happy Relationships Miss Most About Being Single

A long-term committed relationship comes with some sacrifices that many people overlook. While you love your partner, there are many things you’ll miss about the single life.

Do not feel guilty if you are happy in a relationship but still recall the good times you had when you flew solo. We all evolve in life–entering a new phase does not diminish the fond memories of the old one.

new love

1. Single People Don’t Answer to Anyone

There’s an obligation to cook well-rounded meals when there’s more than just you in the home. While a burger and fries might suit a single person, you want to cook something better as a couple. Eating what you want and where you want is something that many people miss about their single days.

2. Eating Whatever You Want

When you’re part of a couple, you must consider their food likes and dislikes. If they hate pizza, it can mess up your Friday nights. What about taco Tuesday that they’re counting on? It makes things challenging when you don’t even like tacos.

Learning how to cook and eat with each other’s preferences in place can be a challenge. Though new love is exciting, trying to eat something they don’t like can be complicated.

3. A Single Alarm Clock

Gone are the days when only one alarm blared you into the day. If your partner has to get up before you, their alarm clock can be an annoyance that disturbs your sleep. The new love part is exciting, but you wish they wouldn’t need an alarm clock to get up.

4. Having the Bed to Yourself

Is there any better feeling than sleeping alone? You can lay sideways in the bed if you want to, and there’s no one hogging the covers. Having a bed to yourself allows you to get some of the best sleep in your life. When you bring another person into this space, things can get cramped.

5. Being Single Means Only Having One Schedule to Consider

While you and your partner will indeed like similar things, it’s highly doubtful that you will do everything alike. Sometimes they want to watch a game or go to a sports event, and you may not like sports.

When you’re with someone you love, it’s all about give and take. You must give up some of the things you love so that you can spend time doing something they like. If you’re not flexible, it will be challenging for a relationship to work.

6. You Can Stay Out as Late as You Want

You can come and go as you please when you’re not tied to someone else. So you don’t have to answer for that midnight run for a candy bar. Nor do you feel any pangs of guilt if you come home too late. There’s no need to feel guilty about going out with your friends for a drink.

7. Sleeping As Long as You Want When You Were Single

Remember those Saturday mornings when you slept till noon? If your partner is an early bird, they might not appreciate you sleeping in for so long.

Your time is your own when you’re single, and you love that there’s no one to answer to for sleeping too much. You can take an entire day to slumber, and no one cares when you’re by yourself.

8. Traveling Spontaneously

Remember those days when you would hop in your car and let the road take you wherever you wanted to go? Now, you must concern yourself with your partner’s schedule. What if they can’t get time off work? You may feel guilty being spontaneous when they’re stuck at home.

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9. Giving Up your Self-Sufficient Independence

There’s a sense of self-sufficiency that comes with being single. Women don’t depend on men to change the lightbulb, fix the sweeper, and do those little things. It’s refreshing when you know you don’t need to depend on anyone else.

On the flip side, a man may like cooking and doing things like sewing on a button. Being by yourself allows you to learn how to care for yourself without depending on anyone, and it’s a beautiful feeling.

10. Your stuff Stays in the Same Location

When you live by yourself, nothing ever gets moved unless you’re the one to move it. However, when someone else is in your space, you might have to hunt for things that have been relocated. One of the best things about flying solo is that you have your system going on, and when you bring in a partner, they mess with the flow of things.

11. Engaging In More Self-Care

When you’re part of a couple, your time alone will decrease. Self-care is nothing you should ever cut back on, but when you’re with someone else, you might take this private time to be with them. If you’re going months without a haircut or struggling to get that pedicure, you must know that it’s vital to have time for yourself.

12. Single People Have the Most Personal Space

There’s not a person alive who doesn’t value personal space. Sometimes you need to be alone and shut the door. When you’re part of a couple, they may feel something is wrong, or you’re upset when you want to be alone. There’s always someone to answer to, which can complicate things.

13. Making Your Own Decisions

New love is fantastic, but sometimes you like how being single makes you more accessible. If there’s a decision about where you will live, work, or if you take that vacation, you don’t need to consider anyone else. Sometimes being with a partner can feel like you’re wings of freedom have been clipped a bit.

14. Not Answering to Anyone About Money

Being single means that you can spend or save as you desire. You don’t have to worry about someone else spending money you wanted to put back, and there’s no need to answer why you must have that $6 gourmet coffee each day. Your finances were yours to do with what you please, and you didn’t need to answer to anyone.

15. Single People Spend Less Time on Daily Hygiene

Shockingly, you will miss those times when you didn’t have to groom as much. Women might especially forget the no-shave winters, as now they must ensure their legs are always touchable and soft.

Men may want to go without shaving their beards, but it might irritate their partner’s face. There’s endless grooming when you’re with a partner, as you want to ensure that you’re not offensive and remain attractive.

16. The Excitement of the Chase

Some folks love dating. The thrill of a first date can be exhilarating. However, you don’t have anything to look forward to when you’re already with someone.

Being chased or pursued by a potential suitor is quite exciting. The flowers, candy, gifts, endless phone calls, and texts are motivating. Consequently, these things sort of end when you settle into a routine.

17. Using Fake Excuses to Get Out of Things

When dating, you could tell the little white lie to get out of things. Conversely, avoiding dreaded activities when they live with you is much more challenging. They know if you’re busy or not, and you certainly can’t make up somewhere to be when you’re with them 24×7.

According to relationship coach Sam Owen, even a little, tiny white lie can devastate your relationship. You must be upfront and honest about everything if you don’t want to return to those single days.

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Final Thoughts on Things You Miss About Being Single

While there are certainly some things you will miss about your time alone, there’s so much more to life than being a party of one. Having someone to share your life with is one of the greatest blessings, as you know someone always has your back and is by your side. Think about all those cold nights when there’s no one to snuggle up to.

According to John Hopkins University, there are twelve elements to any good relationship. One of these essential elements is alone time. Just because you’re part of a couple doesn’t mean that you can’t or shouldn’t have some time alone. You need that space to regroup sometimes; the right person will understand and give you the necessary space. So enjoy your excellent new relationship, knowing it’s natural to remember those memories fondly from when you were single.

12 Behaviors a Loyal Partner Will Display

It’s normal to question if you have a loyal partner. They’re all heavy words– faith, honesty, truth, and loyalty. You may have some basic concept of these things, but it’s not until you’re in a fully committed relationship that you truly understand them.

You can be loyal to your favorite restaurant, your faith, or a sports team. Even these things take your time to develop that respect. Your favorite eatery earned a special place in your mind because of all the good experiences while dining with them. One thing you cannot do is force someone to be loyal to you. These are things that someone earns over a period.

Twelve Signs of a Loyal Partner

When you first start a relationship, you can’t expect this person to have the kind of devotion a couple of 25 years has developed. Just like your love blossoms and grows, so does your dedication. How do you know if you’re dating someone who is a loyal partner? Here are some signs of a dependable and devoted person that you should see from early on.

loyal partner

1. Their Phone and Email Accounts Are Not Hidden

It’s an honest person who leaves their phone on the table with you while they go to another room. They don’t try to hide texts, phone calls, or email messages. They’re transparent with their phone and don’t mind you going through them.

People who have something to hide will be very secretive with their phones. They will take calls in the other room, downplay texts, and act suspicious every time it rings. Someone who never deletes their history and is trustworthy with their phone is a keeper.

2. A Loyal Partner Maintains Appropriate Boundaries with Others

One of the biggest signs of a loyal partner is maintaining proper boundaries with others. Are they flirtatious with people when they’re with you, or are they sending nonverbal cues while in your presence? These are disrespectful actions that show they’re not loyal or committed.

You can bet this person has a wandering eye and won’t be faithful to you. Save yourself the heartache and move on. Someone in the relationship 100 percent will only have eyes for you. Even if someone flirts with them, they will politely turn them down.

3. They Show Consistency

Consistency is a part of loyalty. Your partner shows up daily and proves how devoted they are to you. You don’t have those games of hot/cold behavior where you can’t decide if they’re on today or off.

You know where you stand with them. They’re consistent in everything they do. You look forward to those cheesy texts each day because you know that you’re the first thing on their mind when they get up.

This person knows that the foundation of loyalty and faithfulness is consistency, and they’ve mastered it.

4. A Loyal Partner Will Keep Their Word

If someone tells you that they’re going to be at your front door to pick you up at six pm, you expect them to be there. You’re only as good as your word, and a loyal partner knows how to say what they mean and mean what they say.

You can count on this person to do what they promised they would do. When there are little broken promises every day, it puts a wedge between you. However, if you can count on them as you count on the sun to come up in the morning, you’ve found a loyal partner you should hold onto.

5. They Manage Their Emotions Effectively

If someone can manage their emotions, it shows they’ve matured. They know how to be empathetic towards you and the situations you find yourself in, and they’re loyal because they’re not constantly being spastic. Coping with stress is a constant battle in life, and you can’t have someone loyal to you unless they learn effective ways to cope with daily stressors.

Mental Health America warns that people who don’tknow how to manage their emotions will turn to things like bullying, self-harm, and substance abuse. You don’t want any of those things in a relationship, so ensure they can manage their stress effectively.

6. They’re Proud to Show You Off

There’s nothing worse than being stuck in the friend zone in a relationship. You want someone who isn’t afraid to show you off, as they’re proud you’re with them. They won’t hesitate to post your pictures on social media and declare their love publicly.

They want you to go to all their social events with them, as they can’t imagine one night without you. When someone is proud that you’re their other half, it shows loyalty and devotion.

7. They’re the Rock You Can Lean On

Your home is built on concrete footers, ensuring it’s not going anywhere. Wood is a vital building material but put into the ground can rot and decay over time. However, laying the solid rock foundation behind it makes it a tower of strength.

You want your partner to be as strong as you and your home’s foundation. They hold you up when everything around you seems to fall apart. They’re faithful, steadfast, and supportive. They know the right words to say to make even the darkest night seem brighter.

loyal partner

8. They Always Tell the Truth

What most people wouldn’t give to have a partner who tells the truth! Some people seem to have a problem with the very concept of the word. However, the truth is not a problem if you’ve found a loyal partner. They’re honest and transparent, qualities you want in any person.

9. They Embrace Routine and Change

If you know one thing about life, it’s constantly changing. What’s here today may be gone tomorrow. You want someone who can embrace change as well as routine.

There will be seasons in your life when everything seems mundane and boring, but these are the times you should relish the most. It won’t be long before everything turns upside down, and the foundation is the only thing you have remaining in your relationship. Being flexible is an admirable quality that helps you weigh out the ebbs and flows of life.

10. They Guard Your Secrets

A loyal partner is someone with whom you can be vulnerable without the fear of them telling your embarrassing stories. You know that you can tell them anything, and it will never go beyond the two of you.

They’re fiercely protective of you and won’t dare betray your trust. This is one of the impressive signs of loyalty in a relationship, and it’s a sign that this person is a keeper.

11. A Loyal Partner Displays Physical and Emotional Intimacy

Many people get hung up on physical intimacy, but the truth is that you need emotional intimacy too. Sometimes it’s things like wrapping your arms around them in a tight hug or patting their shoulder that mean so much. You don’t always have to connect intimately, as there are many other needs in a relationship.

12. They Always Talk Positively and Tell the Truth About You

Someone who is a loyal partner will say the same things to your face that they say when you’re not there. You don’t want someone who kisses you and then sticks a knife in your back when you turn around. Talking trash about your partner is not classy, and it just shows that they’re not a loyal person to you.

Your devoted partner should talk about you positively to others and be the first one to jump to your defense. Not only is this a sign of a healthy relationship, but it also shows that they’re 100 percent devoted to you.

truth

Final Thoughts on Recognizing the Truth and Kindness a Loyal Partner Will Display

The truth is that a loyal partner is not always easy to find. Even the princess had to kiss a few frogs before one turned into a handsome prince. You want someone with whom you can grow individually and as a couple.

They should enhance your life and not further complicate it. Together, you can grow into a potent force that can stand the test of time.

7 Habits to Build a Healthier Relationship

Perhaps you’ve recently hit a few roadblocks in your love life and want to create a healthier relationship. Most of us desire a stress-free, happy romantic life full of kindness and empathy. But things don’t always work that way.

Life comes with many problems and challenges we must navigate, including in our relationships. However, we can learn to fortify our relationships, so external stressors don’t affect them as much.

7 Habits to Build a Healthier Relationship

Below, we’ll review a few essential habits that ensure a more fulfilling relationship–one filled with empathy for each other and compassion.

relationship

1.     Practice Mindfulness With Your Partner.

To have a healthier relationship, you and your partner need quality time for each other. This isn’t always easy to accomplish with life’s pressures and demands. However, no relationship can survive if couples don’t try connecting and listening to one another. Being mindful means shutting out distractions so that your full attention goes to your partner.

So, to create a healthier relationship, turn off the TV, smartphones, and other devices in your partner’s company. This shows them that nothing will come between your time together. Your company email or Facebook feed will still be there later, but your partner needs your empathy now.

You don’t have to plan an elaborate date to enjoy each other’s company. Just sitting and talking with them could help you reconnect. In today’s world, many relationships have fallen victim to the digital revolution, with more people distracted than ever. However, we can begin restoring our relationships by being present for one another.

2.     Allow Time For Fun Activities.

You may feel restless or bored if you’ve been with your partner for many years. Daily life is an endless cycle of commuting, working, making meals, and doing chores. Any relationship will lose its luster after a while, so making time for fun is essential.

Some studies indicate that even planning an exciting activity with your partner can spice things up. Doing something spontaneous, like taking a last-minute weekend trip, could reignite the spark you’ve been missing.

So, to build a healthier relationship, put aside work and chores for a while and have some fun! Go to a theme park, plan a trip to an exotic country, or even try a new restaurant in town. This will help you feel more satisfied in the relationship and let go of worries for a while.

3.     Practice Active Listening and Respond With Empathy.

Sadly, many people today don’t make time to listen to one another truly. We have become human doings rather than beings, rushing from one place to the next. We have forgotten the art of slowing down, telling stories, and showing empathy for one another. You can see this in almost every interaction, not just romantic relationships.

So, if you want to repair communication with your partner, set down the devices and practice active listening. This involves looking your partner in the eyes when they speak and turning your full attention to them. It means not interjecting and listening until they have finished speaking. In essence, it means listening to understand rather than reply. When you respond, do so with empathy and kindness to convey the depth of your love.

People need to feel heard and seen to find happiness in relationships. So, show your authentic self and share your deepest thoughts with your partner. And give them the space and permission to do the same with you.

4. Approach Problems In the Relationship as a Team.

Many people would have healthier relationships if they had a team mentality. When problems arise, most people in relationships naturally go on the defense and get into arguments. They’re seeing issues from a “me vs. you” mindset instead of approaching them as a couple. However, finding a solution that benefits you both will strengthen the relationship.

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5. Express Gratitude For Your Partner.

How often do you tell your partner “thank you” for something they’ve done? If you want a healthier relationship, it’s important to remind your SO of everything you love about them. You may not say it enough if you’ve been with them for many years. However, expressing gratitude about minor things, such as making coffee or washing your car, can make them feel appreciated.

5.     Have a Nighttime Routine Together.

This one might seem strange, but having a nightly routine could help build a healthier relationship. If you have to do chores anyway, why not make it more fun by getting your partner involved?

It also offers bonding time, especially if you’ve both been at work all day. Brushing your teeth or making tea together may not sound all that exciting, but it’s another opportunity to connect.

Going to bed simultaneously can also benefit couples, as studies have shown it can boost REM sleep. So, to create a happier relationship, make time to unwind with your partner at night.

6. Turn the Negatives Into a Positive.

Every couple gets under each other’s skin at some point, but fighting over petty matters creates tension. For example, perhaps your boyfriend or husband isn’t pulling his weight regarding household chores. You may feel resentful or passive-aggressive if his behavior continues and he seems indifferent about it. However, instead of lashing out, take a more constructive approach by expressing your needs clearly and calmly. Rather than getting upset at them for their behavior, explain what would make you happy. They’ll be more receptive if you express what you want rather than what you hate about their behavior.

7. Speak Your Relationship Partner’s Love Language.

Love language refers to the ways your partner expresses and receives love. Marriage counselor Dr. Gary Chapman came up with five love languages that describe how couples experience love. These include acts of service, words of affirmation, gift giving, quality time, and physical touch.

Some people respond more strongly to kind words or affirmations of love, while others would rather receive love through actions. To know your partner’s love language, ask them directly how they prefer experiencing love. Understanding your SO’s needs will help build a healthier relationship.

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Final Thoughts on What Creates a Healthier Relationship

In today’s world, we’ve overcomplicated relationships and perhaps expected too much from our partners. At the end of the day, we’re all imperfect humans just trying to make it in life.

Our relationships can provide comfort and happiness, but problems will always arise. It’s how we approach them and weather the storms that determine the outcome of our relationships, though. So, if you want a healthier relationship, remember to look at it as a team effort and have realistic expectations.

5 Reasons Why Highly Intelligent People Often Have a Messy House

Have you ever heard that creative people tend to have a messy house? Many creative people also possess the superior intellect and thrive in chaotic environments. Highly intelligent people emphasize solitary pursuits like research and contemplating solutions to life’s problems.

They don’t feel as concerned with keeping up appearances and maintaining a spotless household. Simply put, they don’t have time for trivial matters like cleaning when they’re trying to solve world hunger or develop a life-saving technology. People with high intellect tend to focus on one subject, making it challenging to meet other responsibilities.

5 Reasons Why Creative, Intelligent People Have A Messy House

In some cases, having a messy house implies laziness, but not when it comes to brilliant folks. They’re some of the most energetic people on the planet, but they use their energy wisely. Below, we’ll explain why intelligent, creative people tend to have cluttered households.

messy house

1.     An Unkempt House Can Encourage New Ideas.

A study by researchers from the University of Minnesota found that a messy house could encourage creativity and novelty. They discovered that a cleaner environment does have its perks, such as promoting generosity and healthy eating. However, a disorderly environment makes people more likely to think outside the box.

“Prior work has found that a clean setting leads people to do good things: Not engage in crime, not litter, and show more generosity,” psychological scientist and lead author of the study Kathleen Vohs explains. “We found, however, that you can get really valuable outcomes from being in a messy setting.”

For example, the researchers asked participants to brainstorm new uses for ping pong balls in one experiment. They divided participants between a messy room and a clean one. Both groups generated the same number of ideas. But, impartial judges rated ideas from people in the unkempt room as more enjoyable.

“Being in a messy room led to something that firms, industries, and societies want more of: Creativity,” says Vohs.

Next, the researchers asked participants to choose between a novel product and an existing one. They found that most people in the messy room chose the new product, indicating that a disordered environment encourages non-conventional thinking. However, most participants in the tidy room chose an established product.

“Disorderly environments seem to inspire breaking free of tradition, which can produce fresh insights,” Vohs concludes. “Orderly environments, in contrast, encourage convention and playing it safe.”

2.     They Don’t Adhere to Social Norms.

Some people prefer a messy house because it stimulates new ideas and views of the world. Highly intelligent people also dislike authority and have a propensity for independence.

Therefore, they may not clean their house as often because they don’t see the point in following the herd. To them, a messy house doesn’t say anything negative about their character, so they have no problem with it.

They don’t care about being accepted by others, so they make up their own rules. Intelligent, creative people only clean when they can’t take the mess any longer. They’d rather spend a day tidying up than doing a little each week like most people do.

messy house

3.     Intelligent People Use Their Energy For Other Pursuits.

People with high intelligence spend most of their time reading books or researching interesting subjects. They’re so immersed in their passions that cleaning rarely crosses their minds. That’s why they prefer to clean once a month or when they get around to it.

They might use their energy for developing new technologies or running a large company that requires much of their attention. Highly intelligent people focus on complex ideas such as quantum physics or other scientific subjects. They don’t have the bandwidth for trivial matters like having a messy house.

4. They’re Lost in Their Thoughts, Not Caring About the Messy House.

Creative people often get so lost in their thoughts that they don’t notice their surroundings. They’re off in their own world, contemplating our universe’s existence and nature. They get so immersed in these ideas that they hardly pay attention to anything else. Relationships and eating take a backseat to their brainstorming sessions because they require so much mental stimulation.

Unlike most people, they don’t get excited by everyday events like eating at a new restaurant or buying the latest gadgets. Intelligent people come alive by discussing ideas rather than people or places. So, it makes sense why a messy house wouldn’t bother them if they’re contemplating the bigger picture.

5.     They Have A Messy House Because Cleaning Seems Boring.

As we hinted at in the point above, geniuses find cleaning quite monotonous and uninteresting. They only clean when necessary but have a higher threshold for messiness than most people. Intelligent people require more mental stimulation than cleaning can provide, so it’s not on the top of their to-do list. After all, they’ve got companies to run and scientific endeavors to pursue.

Everyday tasks seem dull compared to envisioning a better future and taking steps to achieve it. That’s why intelligent people seem to lack the common sense of regular folks, but they think on a different wavelength. Ordinary people may enjoy the reward of a clean home, but a genius will see it as punishment.

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Final Thoughts on Why Intelligent People Usually Have a Messy House

If you have astute friends or family, you may find that they keep a messy house. Perhaps it bothered you in the past, and you immediately wanted to tidy things up for them. Now you know why they live in a disorderly environment and don’t seem phased by the clutter. Of course, many people with average intellect also live in chaos, so a person’s environment doesn’t tell the whole story.

However, some of the brightest people in history seem to have put cleaning on the backburner. Do you know any brilliant people who also have a messy house? Let us know in the comments!

10 Ways to Celebrate When You Have a Broken Heart

You rarely associate sadness with a special occasion to celebrate. But sometimes, life throws you a curveball, bringing unexpected heartbreak. While everyone else happily enjoys the celebrations on special occasions, you may feel disconnected and lost. Life is rarely like the Hallmark movies portray it. There’s death, sickness, and pain. Sadly, if you live long enough, you’ll experience suffering.

While you may feel the raw emotions of loss, others in your family might be ready to move on–and they invite you to celebrate with them. So, if you feel sad because of losing someone or experiencing heartbreak during a special occasion, here are ten ways to get through.

How to celebrate a special occasion, even if you are brokenhearted

If you choose to mark special occasions during your loss, keep these tips in mind.

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1. Look to God or your higher power to help you celebrate life

Life can hit you out of nowhere. Many people get help from looking to God during sadness and grief. Bring your heartache to him, asking for strength to get through another day. God wants your honesty, so you tell him how you feel. You may want to pray something like this prayer of St. Augustine of Hippo.

Lord, our God, we are in the shadow of your wings. Protect us and bear us up. You will care for us as if we were little children, even to our old age. When you are our strength, we are strong; but when we are our own strength, we are weak. We now return to you, O Lord, that we may never turn away again. Amen –St. Augustine of Hippo

2. Don’t believe all you tell yourself

It’s easy to fall into negative self-talk. Resist the urge to believe everything you’re saying to yourself. Accept that your sense of what’s true is skewed right now by your heartbreak. Life may look bleak, but instead of seeing everything as hopeless, try to tell yourself it won’t always be this way. Whenever you try to tell yourself something negative, counter it with a tiny positive thing. Even the slightest positive statement can help alter your perspective.

3. Keep a routine

When you’re struggling with grief and sadness, keeping a routine will help you. It allows you to have a predictable pattern of eating, working and sleeping, which can bring a sense of calm. Fight to maintain your routine even if you don’t feel like keeping one. Get out of bed each morning, eat something during the day, do a little work. These small attempts at a routine will help you get through this challenging season.

4. Acknowledge your feelings, even as you celebrate life’s occasions

Losing someone you love is extremely difficult. It’s normal to feel sad. Don’t feel pressured to act happy during special occasions. Your close friends and family who know what is going on won’t expect you to fake happiness. Ask them to pray and support you during the special occasion. It may be good to ask if they wouldn’t mind hanging out with you at the celebration to push away people who don’t understand what you’re going through. They can help you quietly slip out of the get-together if you’re struggling.

5. Avoid social media

You may want to avoid checking your Instagram or TikTok for a while. Social media can be complex when you’re grieving. It’s hard to see all the happy posts of smiling people. As you scroll through, you may be tempted to feel like everybody else’s life is perfect. You may resent their seemingly carefree life. Remember, no one has a perfect life. For your own sake, take a break from your social media sites until you feel better and have a better perspective.

6. Celebrate life’s milestones but also remember your self-care

Be sure to take care of yourself. Try to eat well, get some sleep, and exercise. Even if you don’t feel like doing it, get outside for a walk around your neighborhood. The sunshine will help you feel a bit better. Avoid bad habits that will hurt your health, like smoking or drinking too much alcohol. Getting into these habits will only make things worse for you.

7. Volunteer to help the host or hostess

Studies found that when you help others, it reduces your depression and anxiety. After losing someone, you may want to offer to help at a celebration or a special occasion. Helping could be a way for you to honor your loved one. They would be proud of you for attempting to help even in your grief.

8. Take breaks when needed

Be sure to take breaks when you need them. You may want to try doing something you love, like painting, visiting a museum, or going to sporting events. It’s okay to give yourself some space. Find ways to reduce stress and clear your mind, especially before attending a special occasion.

9. Join a grief group before the special celebration

If you know the special occasion is around the corner, it may be helpful to join a support group before the celebration to prepare yourself for it. Perhaps there’s a wedding coming up that you must attend. The people in your support group can give suggestions about what they did when facing something like this. Their encouragement and support can help you get through the celebration.

10. Be patient with yourself

Remember to be patient with yourself. You’re going through a lot right now, dealing with heartbreak. It’s common to feel many emotions right now. Don’t worry about not feeling happy at the special occasion celebration. That you show up is enormous, so be content with that. You may not feel like a celebration, but being with people can be helpful amid your grief.

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What are the stages of grief?

There are five stages of grief, but not everyone goes through each stage similarly. The main thing is that you move forward through the stages and find peace.

Denial

Denial may help you buffer the shock of your hurtful situation. When a heartbreaking situation happens, it’s hard to believe. The reality of the loss is overwhelming. You may feel emotionally numb for a while. Life may feel unsafe and out of control.

Anger

At some point, you’ll feel angry about what happened. It may surprise you at the intensity of your anger. You don’t need to fear your anger if you use it constructively and not against people. This is also the stage when you might question why the particular happened. Often when people are angry, they blame God for allowing it. Your anger may not be rational, but it’s real and part of the grieving process. If you’re in this stage of grief, it may not be a good idea to join in celebrations of special occasions for fear that you erupt in anger at someone at the celebration.

Bargaining

This stage of grief gives you a glimmer of hope. You might think that you can restore what was lost. You long for life to return to “normal,” meaning what your life was like before the event happened. You may have conversations with God or yourself mulling over what happened and what life could have looked like. You may feel guilty about something you did or didn’t do. As emotionally difficult as this stage is, it’s necessary to work through the reality of your loss.

Depression

This stage is different for everyone. There isn’t a wrong way to go through this stage. This stage isn’t a sign that you have mental health issues, but one of the typical five stages everyone goes through in grief. Now the reality is setting in, and you feel it emotionally. You feel unfortunate and may experience despair. Other things you may encounter in this stage include:

  • Extreme tiredness
  • Confused
  • Distracted and unable to focus
  • Vulnerable
  • Loss of appetite
  • Not wanting to get out of bed
  • Not able to enjoy the things you used to

If you’re in this stage of grief during a special occasion, have a friend or family member stick with you during the celebration. You may need a hand to hold while everyone else around you celebrates.

Acceptance

Once you’ve reached this stage, it doesn’t mean you’re feeling good again. You may never be the same because of your loss, but you will come to where you’ll have acceptance of the situation. Acceptance means you acknowledge your loss and are ready to learn how to live with your loss. It’s believing that you can readjust your life. In this stage, you’re more able to reach out to friends and family, but you may set boundaries. If you’re in this stage during a special occasion celebration, you may feel you want to go for a short time with someone else. You’ll still feel grief and sadness, but the pain may be less than at first.

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Final thoughts on learning to celebrate special occasions with family, even when you suffer a loss

Being part of a celebration during a special occasion is hard when grieving a loss or experiencing heartache. There’s no right or wrong way to get through this time, but understanding the five stages of grief can help you understand your feelings. Be sure to have trusted friends and family members around you to listen and support you during each stage of your grief. Be sure you’re not alone when you put on a brave face and celebrate special occasions.

Nurse Promised to Adopt the Son of a Terminally Ill Single Mom

After being diagnosed with liver cancer, a terminally ill single mom worried about what would happen to her son. Tricia Somers had an 8-year-old son named Wesley, so her main concern was finding someone to care for him.

Unfortunately, both of her parents died many years ago. Moreover, she didn’t believe any other family members could take on the responsibility of looking after Wesley.

Thankfully, her oncology nurse, also named Tricia, stepped up to the plate and offered to adopt Wesley. Somers felt a close connection with Tricia Seaman and knew she could trust her with her son.

While Somers realized the gravity of the situation, she intuitively felt that Tricia would agree to adopt Wesley. So, she worked up the courage to ask her right before being discharged from the hospital.

Somers and Seaman had gotten close during the ten days Somers spent at Pinnacle Health Hospital. Located in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, Somers underwent many diagnostic tests and a procedure to treat cancer.

After learning she was terminally ill with liver cancer, the single mom only had one thought in her mind. So, on her final day in the hospital, she presented Seaman with her last dying wish.

She asked her favorite nurse, “When I die, will you and your husband raise my son?”

Initially, Seaman didn’t know what to say to such a big request. After all, they had only met ten days earlier and didn’t know each other well. But Somers just had a gut feeling about the situation. She described the nurse as an “angel” and felt an instant bond with her.

Somers added that as soon as her cancer nurse walked into the room, she felt comforted. Seaman didn’t have to say a word for her to feel surrounded by love and support.

She called her an angel because she had never felt that way around anyone before. Somers felt like someone had covered her with a warm blanket, a sign that she was in good hands.

The Terminally Ill Mom’s Wish Came True

terminally ill

However, the nurse didn’t say “yes” to the request immediately. While she genuinely wanted to help, she told Somers she should take time to think it over.

Of course, the nurse felt flattered that the terminally ill mom would trust her in caring for Wesley. However, she wanted to take a diplomatic approach and ensure everyone involved would feel comfortable.

It seemed like fate that Seaman and Somers met at the hospital. Seaman and her family had recently gone through the process of becoming foster parents. They’d also been approved as adoptive parents and completed the first step in that process. So, it seems the universe was on Somers’ side after all.

After asking the nurse to adopt her son, the terminally ill mom and Wesley started visiting Seaman’s family. At first, the nurse came to Somers’ apartment to get to know the pair better.

The next step involved inviting Tricia and Wesley to Seaman’s house. She wanted to see how they would get along with her husband and four children. Besides that, it would help Wesley get acclimated to a new environment.

The first time Somers visited the Seamans’ home, Tricia made sure to ask her opinion. She wanted to know if everything looked okay and if it lived up to her standards. Thankfully, Somers couldn’t have been happier with the house and said everything seemed “perfect.”

Now, the only thing left was to get Seaman’s husband’s approval, Daniel. That evening, she sat down with him and asked how he felt about adopting Wesley. Surprisingly, he had no reservations about the idea. He told her someone needed to help the terminally ill woman, and they were in the best position to do so.

The Oncology Nurse Cared For Both Wesley And Tricia in Her Final Days

Seaman and Somers grew closer while the 45-year-old terminally ill mom underwent chemotherapy. However, the intense treatments made it difficult for Somers to walk, and eventually, she couldn’t take Wesley to school. Even walking to her car or leaving bed seemed like a monumental task for which she no longer had the energy.

When she became too weak to keep up with daily tasks, Somers entered hospice care. But Seaman couldn’t bear to watch her beloved friend spend her last days in a hospital. So she decided to bring Wesley and Tricia into her home to make her more comfortable.

She told Somers that she wasn’t just her nurse any longer – she was family. After inviting her to stay at her home, Somers broke down in tears and wholeheartedly agreed.

When Tricia arrived at the Seaman’s home, doctors believed she only had one month to live. However, with proper treatment and healing, Seaman reported that the cancer gradually improved. She even began walking without a cane and could perform basic tasks independently.

Before Tricia’s death, Seaman and her husband signed adoption papers to become Wesley’s legal guardians. That summer, they took Wesley and Somers on a family vacation with their three teenage daughters and 10-year-old son. Wesley enjoyed having siblings to hang out with, and Tricia savored every last moment with her new family.

On December 7, 2014, Tricia passed away at 45 years old. However, the oncology nurse will never forget her favorite patient. She described her as being “larger than life,” and luckily, Wesley inherited his mom’s fun personality.

Somers had such an impact on Seaman’s life that she wrote a book about her called God Gave Me You. The kind nurse said even though Tricia passed away, she would always be a part of their lives.

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Final Thoughts on Nurse Who Adopted a Terminally Ill Mom’s Son

When a terminally ill mom learned she had liver cancer, she only felt worried about her son. Who would take care of 8-year-old Wesley after her death? Thankfully, she met an angel during her time in the hospital who agreed to adopt him. Tricia Seaman, a longtime oncology nurse in Pennsylvania, felt God brought the two women together for this specific reason.

Now, Wesley lives with his loving adoptive parents and four siblings and feels grateful for them every day. Wesley may have lost his biological mother, but her spirit lives on through the love of his new family.

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