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15 Activities to Create a More Positive Mind

August 2, 2022 by Chris Butler

If you’re looking to create a more positive mind, it may not be as hard as you think. There are many activities you can do that engage your mind to improve your attitude and enhance your positivity. Here are fifteen activities that are guaranteed to give you a mood boost today and every day.

Fifteen Activities to Give You a More Positive Mind and Improve Your Attitude

1 – Music can help you have a positive mindset

Happy music and a cheerful attitude go hand in hand. When you listen to happy music, it produces a positive mind. Whether you’re listening to a classical piece by Beethoven or shaking it off with Taylor Swift, upbeat music lifts your spirit and improves your mood. Listening to happy music triggers the release of dopamine, a mood-stimulating chemical that makes you feel good. So, if you want an activity that gives you a happy boost, try listening to a catchy tune.

2 – Exercise improves your attitude

There’s a definite link between exercise and positivity. On the opposite side, inactivity causes you to feel sluggish and down. Exercise releases endorphins, serotonin, and other stress hormones that improve your mood. Other are lots of other benefits of exercise, including:

Better sleep
Improved focus and concentration
Higher energy levels
Relieves stress
Relaxes your skeletal system, so your entire body is relaxed

3 – Eat good foods for a more positive mind

Part of staying positive includes eating good, nutritious foods. Limit eating processed foods, sugary foods, and foods high in fat. These foods mess with your gut and make you feel sluggish and tired. All these things affect your mental health and attitude. Eating nutritious foods boosts your energy, making you more productive and happier. Try eating these foods to improve your mindset.

Avocadoes
Dark chocolate
Black beans
Coffee
Coconut
Blueberries
Eggs
Red wine
Seaweed
Salmon
Whole-grain bread

4 – Take a trip

Traveling is a positivity booster for your brain. Visiting other countries stimulates your mind because you’re learning about cultures different from yours, meeting new people and experiencing new things. All in all, going on a trip enhances a positive mind. Travel allows you to pursue your dreams and find new passions. Some of the best places in the world to visit include sites such as:

Grand Canyon, Arizona: Even though it’s in the United States, visiting the Grand Canyon should be on your list. It’s one of the seven natural wonders of the world. Its beauty and sheer size are overwhelming to the eyes.
Machu Picchu, Peru: Once a sacred royal retreat of the Inca rulers, this remote spot amazes visitors with its stonework cascading down the mountainside.
Rome, Italy: Visiting Rome is like visiting a museum. Ancient ruins and modern-day must-see places all co-exist in this fantastic city. It should be high on your list of places to travel.
Masai Mara, Kenya: A sizeable national reserve park, home to the big five animals, including lions, elephants, rhinos, leopards, and Cape Buffalos.
Maui, Hawaii: One of the Hawaiian islands that offer surfing, engaging cultural experiences, and five-star hotels. Check out the dormant volcanoes or walk through a beautiful rainforest as part of your tropical travel experience.
Istanbul, Turkey: As the capital of Turkey, Istanbul offers good food, history, and culture worth exploring.
New Zealand: This island country boasts beautiful landscapes and fun places to visit.
Angkor Wat, Cambodia: Here, you’ll see the largest religious site in the world. There are hundreds of ruins to explore all over this capital.

5 – Journal with words or pictures

Studies show that being able to express yourself through writing helps lower your anxiety and makes you feel overall happier. Writing your thoughts and feelings enables you to understand what’s going on in your heart and mind. It helps you let go of negative emotions. Even if you’re not much of a writer, that’s okay. Just getting words on a paper can help improve your attitude.

Another form of journaling that’s growing in popularity is illustrative journaling. Instead of writing about your day or thoughts, you draw small illustrations. Each day you start a new page and fill it with pictures of what you ate, an image of a book you read, or a description of a bird you heard singing outside your living room window. You’ll see how your days played out through these illustrations when you look back over the weeks. You don’t need to be a fantastic artist but enjoy drawing.

6 – A positive mind is grateful

The grateful person is attentive to the little things in life. There are so many experiences, situations, and people to be thankful for when you look for them. Whether it’s something as essential as your clothes, home, AC unit, good health, or family, gratitude is within reach. Expressing gratitude is like working a muscle in your body. The more you do, the stronger it becomes. Before you know it, thankfulness becomes a daily habit in your life. If you want a positive mind, find something to be grateful for today.

7 – Breathe to turn a negative attitude into a positive mindset

Even though breathing is involuntary and voluntary, your body naturally causes you to breathe, but sometimes you need to take a couple of deep breaths to let go of negativity. It’s incredible how this simple exercise of getting more oxygen into your brain and body lowers your stress and boosts your attitude. Try inhaling deeply and then exhaling slowly to let out the air. You will feel better and experience an improved ability to

Think clearly
Fee focused
More positive
Less anxious and stressed

8 – Volunteer

Helping others is a natural way to feel more positive about life. Focusing off yourself and onto someone else keeps you mentally stimulated, feels less stressed, and gives you a sense of purpose in life.

9 – Hang out with friends and family

Being socially active creates a more positive mind. Being part of a group gives you purpose and a sense of belonging. It elevates loneliness. Schedule weekly times of hanging out with your friends and family. It’s essential for your mental health.

10 – Don’t believe those negative thoughts

Everyone has negative thoughts once in a while. If you catch yourself constantly giving in to negativity, talk yourself into a more positive mind. Try something the following affirmations:

It’s true. I made a mistake, so what? I can do better next time. Everybody makes mistakes…it’s not my first nor my last.
I’m not good at that…but that’s okay. I’m good at other stuff. That’s what’s important.
I am not smart enough…but so what? Being smart isn’t all there is in life. I’m doing okay.
I’m having a terrible day….but that’s okay. Not every day is going to be amazing. The sun is shining. It’s all in perspective.

11 – Have faith in God

Studies show that people who believe in God have a greater sense of well-being. Assuming that your life has a purpose and that God oversees your life can help you deal with difficulties. You don’t feel you need to control everything in life because you trust God leads and guides your life. Well-known author C. S. Lewis once said,

The more we let God take us over, the more ourselves we become – because He made us. Have faith in God. Who knows, you may find that you truly become a happier version of yourself. -C.S. Lewis

12 – Don’t be too hard on yourself

Don’t be too hard on yourself, even if you’re feeling negative. Everyone has these kinds of days when they feel down emotionally. Accept that today isn’t perfect, but tomorrow will be better. Don’t beat yourself up for mistakes you’ve made. You can do better next time.

13 – Learn from your negative attitude

If you’re experiencing negative consequences for things you’ve done or not done, learn from them and then move on. Everything in life is a learning opportunity if you want it to be.

14 – A positive mind does not try to be all-controlling

Trying to control all things in your life and the lives of your loved ones is a futile exercise. It’s healthy to let go and accept the randomness of life. If you have faith in God, even the most challenging things in life don’t feel overwhelming because you are never alone. God walks with you through your trials and sorrows. An ancient text says,

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. (Psalm 34:18 NIV)

If you feel overwhelmed, feeling like you need to control everything in life, don’t be afraid to let go and ask God to help you feel his nearness.

15 – A social media break could mean a positive mind

Interestingly enough, social media use isn’t all harmful. It depends upon you. For instance, if you use social media simply as part of your day’s routine to check and respond to content, it’s a positive thing in your life. But if you’re using social media for your emotional connections and are worried about missing out or disappointing your friends if you don’t respond, social media can be a negative thing in your life. As long as you use social media and it doesn’t use you, it can be a source of a more positive mind as you learn about others and engage in new information.

Final Thoughts on Habits for a More Positive Mind and a Better Attitude

If you seek a few ways to boost your positivity, look no further than these fifteen suggestions. Try one or two of these ideas or all of them if you’re motivated. Improving your mood could be simple as listening to happy music, eating healthy, or creating an illustrative journal about your day. Whichever idea you try, you’ll experience a more positive view of your life and be a happier version of yourself.

5 Things Women Do That Guys Find Extremely Attractive

August 2, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

One of the things people constantly worry about is what makes them attractive in the eyes of others. Everyone to feel love and appreciation, so we want to make a good first impression. But people also have a hard time communicating. Most of the time, we don’t know what other people consider beyond physical attraction.

Not to say that there are a lot of misconceptions regarding the topic. In most cases, they stem from stereotypes about how people act. Women are particularly targeted by these stereotypes, as people label them as emotional or crazy. Girls often learn that partners value them for their bodies and not their personalities. Well, that’s not the whole truth, because most men find other qualities attractive.

Physical attraction is a very important aspect of attraction, but that’s not all there is to it. Even regarding the physical aspects, most men aren’t attracted just by conventional things. Think of the sie zero blonde fashion model doll–most people do not value that “look.” In most cases, the most attractive things about a girl are the more subtle qualities. Not to mention that it’s more about what women do rather than how they look, anyway.

5 Things Women Do That Guys Find Extremely Attractive

So what do men find attractive in a woman?

1. They Go Out of Their Way to Help Others

Even if you don’t have kids, women still have instincts that make them want to preserve humanity. For a woman, these instincts often manifest as empathy. So, in most cases, women are more prone to help people out than men are.

A man could walk past a homeless person and not even give them the time of day. But when a woman walks past that same person, chances are they’ll stop and see how they can help. You might be wondering why and how is this relevant. That’s because men are instinctually attracted to this kind of behavior. It all goes back to instinct and simple human hardwiring.

But what about the people who don’t fit this norm? What if those men do not react to their instincts? That doesn’t mean they don’t find empathy attractive. They still do, mostly because people aim for a partner to stand by their side. It’s all about knowing that your partner will come to the rescue whenever you’re in trouble. So, above all, physical attributes and qualities like empathy will always be attractive.

2. They Have Similar Interests (Because Physical Attraction Only Goes So Far!)

Everyone’s familiar with the stereotype of the pick-me girl who pretends to be into sports to get a guy to like her. As stupid as that stereotype is, it’s not entirely baseless. While faking that you like something won’t do you any favors, having things in common with a guy is attractive. But that’s only when your interest is genuine.

People tend to stick with peers they can relate to. This is true for all kinds of interpersonal relationships. You’ll tend to hang out with people you have hobbies and interests in common. For example, will likely hang out with your friends you can play video games with as often as possible. But you won’t want to spend as much your work colleagues who you have nothing in common with.

Even if you see them daily for years, sometimes you can’t click with others. Obviously, that’s not something men want to deal with in a relationship. They want to know they can go out and have fun with the girl they like. That doesn’t mean you must be into video games to get a boyfriend.

But men value having someone who shares their passions. Even if you aren’t knowledgeable regarding one of their hobbies, being open to learning does the job. Men love when they can teach others about things they are passionate about.

3. Attractive Women Take Care of Themselves

There’s nothing more attractive than someone happy and comfortable in their skin. The problem is when people believe that taking care of themselves is being skinny or eating loads of salads. However, that’s not what men appreciate in a woman. Sure, some men are superficial and think that looks are the most important.

Other people even think that being skinny is the epitome of health. But that’s not what most men are looking for. They are more interested in finding a woman who knows that taking care of herself means being happy. As a woman, you probably feel much pressure to be and act a certain way. How you dress or do your hair or makeup is influenced by what others think of you.

But a man will appreciate a woman dressed in an outfit she feels good in much more than a woman following trends. A curvy, confident woman who cares more about nutrition than following diets is much more charming than a skinny girl. The most charming woman isn’t afraid to fight for the life she wants while ensuring she has time for things that make her happy. Self-care is a sign that you value yourself, and men appreciate that in a woman.

4. Attractive Women Know How to Play Up Their Natural Beauty

As much as we would like to believe that looks play no role, it’s normal to feel physical attraction. It’s not just normal. Indeed, it’s vital for a healthy and sustainable relationship. But contrary to popular belief, men don’t just want big lips and butts. Actually, studies show that, while standards of beauty keep changing, one thing is constant: being attracted to specific facial features.

Across cultures and decades, this is the only thing that has stayed consistent. Even now, many Asian cultures prefer soft features, petite bodies, and traditional clothing. But Western cultures, especially Americans, prefer the slim-thick body type, trendy clothes, and sharper features. Still, we can all agree that faces are attractive. And especially attributes like facial symmetry. When researchers discuss beauty standards, symmetry is the first metric they analyze.

One quality that might be surprising to learn is considered attractive is averageness. Men don’t like features that are overly exaggerated or out of common. For example, many men don’t prefer women with artificially-filled lips. Instead, they prefer natural beauty. Even in movies, many actresses who play the lead are girls with more or less average features.

Their lips are not any particular size, their eyes are not too wild, and their nose is not too skinny or too wide. Come to think of it, many of the most famous women in the world have features that could be described as enhanced average features. Nothing is too over the top; everything is in place and taken care of. One other factor that’s important when it comes to physical attractiveness is femininity. Men find it very attractive when the effects of secondary sexual characteristics are visible.

To be more concrete, men like softer, rounder faces rather than squared jaws and thinner lips. You cannot change this as a woman, and you shouldn’t have to. Don’t feel bad if your face is not that soft heart shape. Men might feel a biological attraction to these features. However, it doesn’t mean they’ll only go for feminine women. Perception and what you learned growing up is just as important as biology is.

As society evolves, people have started to stray away from the idea that femininity is the only thing that matters. Nowadays, people are physically attracted to all shapes and sizes. Still, facial structure is something that will probably always be valued. That’s why men prize symmetry and average proportions.

5. Physical Attraction Goes Along With a Charming Personality

Above all, personality differentiates a crush from someone a man wants to build a life with. And it’s what makes you stand out and catch a guy’s interest in the first place. Your look might catch his eye, but your personality will spark genuine interest. And personality is something that never fades. As you grow older, your looks will fade, but your sense of humor and quirks won’t.

Studies show that men are attracted to stable and extroverted women. Findings determined that athletic, introverted, and unstable women are the least attractive. Men prefer easy-going, friendly, and pleasant women, even if they aren’t athletic. Instead, men also prize a sense of humor and open-mindedness.

All a man wants is to be with someone who can improve his life. And a jealous and unstable woman will not do that, no matter how good-looking she might be. But a girl who can be your friend and lover is all someone could ask for.

Final Thoughts on Things Women Do That Guys Find Extremely Attractive

Dating is hard for anyone, but especially for women. A romantic life becomes dreadful when you don’t even know what you can do to be more attractive. It’s much easier to realize what attracts a partner. And the good news is that personality and values are more important than looks.

Men want a woman who is kind and empathetic. They also want someone who can share their interests. They want someone funny, friendly, and open-minded. You probably don’t know that men value a woman who can care for herself. They want someone who is happy and stable and who can respect herself. Sure, looks and physical attraction also play a minor role. Being skinny, toned, or athletic aren’t always essential qualities.

Men are more attracted to faces than anything else, and symmetry and averageness are universally valued. While all women should be aware of these five things, there’s something else you should know. Asa woman, don’t allow a partner to dictate your self-esteem. Instead, physical attraction comes from your willingness to work to achieve your happiness.

10 Reasons Children Have Emotional Damage That Parents Don’t Realize

August 1, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Parents affect their child’s life in more ways than they initially realize. Some of the things your child goes through during their childhood can cause emotional damage. While you might recognize some of the instances immediately, there are others that you don’t always immediately see.

Even good parents aren’t perfect, so some of your actions can cause emotional damage. Damage occurs when caregivers verbally or emotionally assault a child. These behaviors damage their self-esteem and disrupt their well-being.

Emotional damage doesn’t go away, as studies show it lingers later in life. It can cause mental health problems that affect their life forever.

Emotional damage can be just as bad for a child as physical abuse. Even one instance of emotional abuse can disrupt their life and cause serious harm. Parenting is hard enough, so learn the reasons for emotional trauma to help give your child the best life possible.

What Is Emotional Abuse?

Research shows that approximately one in seven children has experienced abuse in the past year in the United States. Some of these instances included neglect and emotional abuse.

Anytime a child is made to feel unloved, worthless, scared, or alone, it’s emotional abuse. It’s sometimes called psychological or verbal abuse, and it’s more common than any other type. It involves hostility, yelling, criticism, rejection, teasing, bullying, and witnessing violence.

There are often signs that a child has emotional damage. If you recognize any of these signs, you can’t go back and change anything, but you can do better in the future. Use this information to identify issues and find ways to overcome and help your child regain confidence and self-esteem.

Emotional abuse is complex, and there is more than one type. The different types include:

Rejection: A child gets told that they are unwanted or worthless
Withholding affection: The caregiver ignores the child, showing little interest.
Threats and yelling: The child experiences threats, yelling, and cursing.
Isolation: A child is allowed to engage with friends and loved ones.
Corruption: This type occurs when an adult exposes a child to drugs, alcohol, inappropriate conduct, or criminal behavior.
Exploitation: A caregiver exploits a child when they force an activity without their consent or consideration of their well-being.

Signs and Effects of Emotional Damage

Getting a handle on detrimental behaviors that cause damage to your children is essential. There are many negative impacts of emotional abuse. If you think your child or anyone else is experiencing emotional damage, look for these signs:

avoiding going home
running away
low self-esteem or confidence
developmental delays
declining school work
anxiety or depression
being afraid or distressed
secretive or disruptive behaviors
frequent changes in emotional behavior
trying too hard to please parents
inability to connect
being unable to relate to others
withdrawn behavior
feeling like no one wants them around
self-blame and guilt
inability to trust adults
lying or stealing
self-harm
suicidal thoughts
substance abuse
unhealthy coping strategies
sucking, biting, or rocking for comfort
anti-social behaviors
eating disorders
difficultly sleeping or sleeping too much
aggressive or destructive behavior
inability to express themselves

Trauma affects children differently depending on how old they are. Preschool-aged children might also experience separation anxiety, eat poorly, have nightmares, and cry often.

Reasons Children Have Emotional Damage That Parents Don’t Realize

There are many reasons children have emotional damage, and you might not know all of them them. When you know the causes, you can work to avoid them in your life. Plus, you can alleviate ongoing issues that might lead to trauma.

1. Gossiping with Their Parent

You might think gossiping with your child is harmless, but it has lasting effects. Talking about other family members or friends behind their backs creates a toxic environment.

Even if you don’t intend it to be, your child might subconsciously feel they have to choose their loyalty. They feel like if they say the wrong thing, you’ll think they’re disloyal to you. This reason isn’t to say that filling each other in on other family members is detrimental. However, bad-mouthing others can cause emotional damage.

2. They Witness You Repressing Your Emotions

You might repress your emotions as a coping mechanism for issues you experienced during childhood. If you’ve handled it your entire life, you may not realize you even do it.

You’ll ignore your feelings and pretend everything is okay when it’s not. It teaches your child to behave the same way, making them shut down their feelings instead of feeling them and opening up. Instead, teach them to become emotionally intelligent by allowing them to see you handle things positively.

3. Intense Pressure and Scrutiny

If you pressure your child to excel at everything and never give them room for mistakes, they’ll suffer. Your child will feel like you only love or care about them when they’re doing something well. Sometimes you’ll unintentionally hurt your child’s feelings when they didn’t accomplish something the first time.

If you find that you often do this, make a conscious effort to change because they must know they’re unconditionally loved. Intense pressure and scrutiny negatively affect the child, even with good intentions. They’ll feel your love only occurs when they do what you want.

4. Excessive Teasing

You might think it’s harmless to joke around with your child, and it usually is. However, excessively teasing your child can create emotional damage.

It can decrease your child’s self-esteem if you target their insecurities or cause them to feel left out of a joke. This behavior is a form of manipulation and involves mockery, demoralizing interactions, and humiliation.

5. Witnessing Unhealthy Relationships

When a child sees unhealthy adult relationships, it creates emotional damage. They learn to interact in the same unhealthy ways, setting them up for unhealthy relationships throughout life. If they see or experience passive-aggressive or manipulative behavior, they quickly learn it.

Children who witness unhealthy relationships learn to push good people away because they’re scared to get hurt. It can also cause trust issues and an inability to engage in social settings.

6. Experiencing Financial Stress

It can take a toll if a child’s family experiences financial stress, poverty, or unemployment. Not only do they face the reality of the situation, but they also pick up on their parents’ stress. Living in a low-income neighborhood often indicates a lack of resources. If that’s the case, they might be dealing with negative feelings they’re afraid to open up about.

7. Being Compared to Siblings

Comparing children to their siblings is highly detrimental to their well-being. It causes emotional damage because they’ll never feel good enough. They’ll only focus on their shortcomings rather than honing in on their strengths.

Comparing your children to one another also creates tension between siblings, further creating emotional damage. They’ll always pick at one another, never wanting to admit when the other has done something well. Sibling rivalry is expected, but you don’t want to make it anything more than that.

8. Privacy Violations

It’s your job to look out for and protect your children, but there should be boundaries. If you constantly invade your child’s privacy, they’ll feel like they can’t have limits in their life. It’ll cause them to struggle with telling others no and can lead to a lack of boundaries in other areas of their life.

9. Experiencing Major Life Changes

When a child goes through life changes like moving to a new home or having a sibling, it can cause emotional damage. It won’t always cause issues but can cause turmoil and detrimental changes.

10. Receiving Frequent Guilt Trips

If a child frequently is made to feel guilty, it’ll cause emotional turmoil. They might receive a guilt trip about spending time with others or things outside their control. Whatever it is, it can make them feel obligated to do things they don’t want to do. It can also cause them to miss out on new opportunities or experiences.

Why a Child Doesn’t Always Speak Up

Many people think that if a child experienced emotional trauma, they’d say something. However, this isn’t usually the case.

In many cases, the child feels a sense of loyalty to the person hurting them. They want their caregiver to love and approve of them, so they keep the issues to themselves. Other times, they might be afraid to open up because they don’t know what will happen.

Some children think that everyone gets overly criticized, denied affection, or called names. If they’ve experienced it all their life, they won’t know anything is amiss. When they recognize the difference in their situation, they might be embarrassed to call attention to it.

Final Thoughts on Reasons Children Have Emotional Damage That Parents Don’t Realize

Emotional damage from childhood can affect people throughout adulthood. If you recognized any of the reasons on this list, it’s time to make a change in your family unit. Sometimes you don’t realize it’s harming them, and you can improve it at any time.

If you recognize any signs of emotional damage in another child, make sure to be a positive influence on them. You might not be able to speak up to their parent, but you can try to offer help however possible. Sometimes you might want to report neglect to ensure the child is taken care of.

4 Signs Your New Relationship Won’t Lead to Instant Regret

August 1, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

If you’re anything like the average human, you’ve probably gotten yourself into some complicated romantic entanglements before. You’ve probably had an abusive partner or at least a relationship that seemed promising but was a let-down. If you’re reading this, you undoubtedly regret your choices in your love life. But just because the past didn’t turn out great doesn’t mean the future can’t be a little brighter. The time will come when you will find a partner that won’t lead to instant regret.

Your lousy past experiences have probably made you lose hope of finding someone to make you happy. You probably don’t believe you can build a long-term relationship with someone new. Maybe you don’t even want to have faith in people again. But this will only keep you from finding the right person. You must believe that someone out there can make you feel loved again.

But before starting anything with anyone, evaluate what you want from a relationship. Furthermore, you must watch for some signs that the person you are interested in is worth it. This might seem like you’ll be taking a clinical approach when choosing a partner. But that’s not a bad thing. It’s always better to make sure you back your feelings with logic than to be impulsive and get hurt.

What Should a Healthy Relationship Look Like?

Before considering any new people as potential partners, you must understand what a healthy relationship should look like. And the best way to do that is to evaluate your past relationships and understand why they didn’t work out. While those relationships cause regret, that doesn’t mean you can’t learn from them.

What you should know about any relationship is that to be healthy, there must be trust, open communication, and boundaries. These characteristics are essential, but they are not all a relationship needs to have. If you want to avoid regret, you must also ensure that your partner’s and your needs are met. But first, you need to understand what your needs are. This can look different for everybody. Some people want to have something casual with no strings attached.

Others want to build something long-lasting, maybe even start a family. Everyone has different goals and views, so understanding yours can take to closer to having a good relationship. Another critical factor that can make or break a relationship is having similar principles you base your life. This doesn’t mean you must have all the same goals as your partner. Maybe you want to focus on your career, and they want to start a family, but you can compromise.

If you are willing to change your focus in a few years and start a family, and they will wait, it will all work out. But if you never want to have kids, things won’t work out, and the relationship will probably lead to regret. This can be true for moral values because the relationship can become unstable if they don’t align. All these factors are things you should consider before looking for potential partners.

This is precisely why past relationships can be a learning experience. Even though they led to regret, you can learn from your mistakes and become better at finding love. If you had an abusive relationship, at least you know what red flags to look for. Even the worst possible situations can help you pursue a better life if you learn to use them to your advantage. Still, most relationships don’t end because of abuse. They end because people grow and they don’t see eye to eye anymore.

You can learn from these situations how to make sure you and your partner stay on the same page. A healthy relationship is based on people being able to make compromises and sacrifices for the person they’re with. Not everyone is ready to have a relationship, and it’s okay if you aren’t there yet. You may still haven’t fully healed from your last failed experience. In that case, the future of your romantic life is contingent on your ability to make sure you can be a good partner. We might like to think that other people cause all our regrets, but that’s not always true.

Sometimes, we cause issues that end the relationship ourselves. Even if your intentions are good, sometimes you mess up. You might not know how to communicate or respect someone else’s needs. So, it’s not enough to look for the best potential partner. You need to make sure that you have the potential to be a good partner.

4 Signs Your New Relationship Won’t Lead to Instant Regret

Do you see any of these behaviors in your new partner? You might have found a long-lasting love.

1. You Can Be Yourself Around Them

Even though all relationships need sacrifice and compromise to work out, that doesn’t mean you need to change who you are for someone. In fact, feeling like you need to change for someone is a red flag. The right person will accept you for who you are. And they won’t just accept you; they will love everything about you, even the imperfections. You must understand it’s worth waiting for someone who will make you feel comfortable being who you are.

From the first meeting someone, you can understand how genuine you can be around them. With some people, the connection is instant, and they make you feel comfortable from the beginning. If you are interested in someone who makes you feel like that, that’s a sign you should go for something more. If you form a romantic bond with someone who accepts you, that won’t lead to regret. In fact, it might even mean you found “the one.”

2. They Bring Out the Best in You

Emotions can be weird sometimes. Connecting with someone can completely change your personality based on how you interact with them. You’ll probably be angry and mean when you’re around angry and abusive people. Even if you don’t become toxic, you’ll still isolate yourself and change how you interact with people. But being around the right people will bring out the best in you.

Some people positively affect you and will make you want to be a better person. Even though they see your imperfections, they will want to see you become the best version of yourself. And you can see that in how the people around you interact with you. If your love interest is someone who always wants to help you navigate your issues, that’s a sign they’re the right one for you. They won’t lash out at you and always try to force you to do things their way. Instead, they’ll complete you and give you the motivation you need to succeed.

3. You Feel Like You Can Share Everything with Them

Most regrets in relationships come because of the things you didn’t feel you could say at the right time. People drift apart when they let issues simmer without ever talking about them. And there are some people you won’t feel you can open up around. Even if you love someone, it doesn’t mean you think they understand you. This is true even for platonic relationships.

You might love your parents, but that doesn’t mean you feel like you can share your life with them. Some people can be judgemental, meaning you’re better off hiding some things from them. But you’ll regret having a relationship with someone like that. You will come across people who instill trust from the moment you meet them. There will be something about them that makes you feel comfortable opening up. That’s because you know they’ll never judge or try to use what you tell them against you.

You can talk about your trauma and tell them your whole life story; they’ll listen. They’re there to talk about anything, whether the discussion is light and fun or the topic is more serious. They are interested in getting to know you and always make time to talk to you.

4. You Find Ways to Manage Your Relationship Conflicts

If you want to avoid feeling regret in a relationship, you must know you can handle conflicts. In every relationship, no matter how stable it seems, there will always be issues that need solving. Having problems is natural, and they can even help you strengthen your relationship. The key is knowing how to solve them healthily. And a clear sign that you found someone worthwhile is that you can talk through any problem.

Some people don’t act in good faith when in conflict. When they do something wrong or someone has an issue with them, they feel caged and lash out. Others don’t have the empathy to work things out and arrive at the best possible solutions for both parties. Still, some people will prove they’ll do their best to solve your conflicts. But someone willing to sit down and have a serious discussion to make things work is someone you won’t regret being with.

Final Thoughts on Signs Your New Partner Won’t Lead to Instant Regret

Your past relationships have probably brought along great hurt and regret. But that doesn’t mean all your relationships will be like that. Just because there’s a pattern in your past doesn’t mean you can’t break it. It just takes meeting the right person to build a relationship that will fulfill you.

When you first meet someone, you can’t be sure they won’t end up hurting you. But some signs can give an idea about who they are. If you feel you can be genuine and open around them, they’re someone you can grow with. Even more important, if you can healthily manage your conflicts, you’ll make things work out. You won’t regret pursuing a relationship with them if you feel safe sharing your life. So, as long as you have a little faith, you’ll find someone who will be the perfect match for you.

Journalist Explains How He Used Positive Thinking to Beat Drug Addiction

August 1, 2022 by Deborah Tayloe

Emmanuel Anderson is proof positive that drug addiction can happen to anyone. It’s not a reflection on your education or social status, as sometimes it just takes one simple mistake to head down the wrong path. Sadly, addiction is not only a dangerous life but often deadly. Fortunately, people can reclaim their lives by learning from their mistakes, embracing positive thinking, and making healthy new habits. This story reveals how this journalist embraced triumph over drugs.

Anderson’s story began in his hometown in Ghana. By the time he was a sophomore in high school, Anderson was what most people would call a “good boy.” He had never tasted alcohol or even smoked a cigarette by this point. He thought of himself as someone “green” or inexperienced.

He hung out with a group of “cool kids” at his high school–the hip-hop guys. In fact, he enjoyed this association, as they were the guys who got all the pretty girls. The real problem was that Anderson’s parents sheltered him from the world around him. When he got his first taste of freedom during his sophomore year of high school, everything changed.

One Bad Choice Was All It Took

Freedom comes with a cost, but Anderson maintained his good-boy status for a few years. It wasn’t until he met a new friend that his entire world began to change. His friend had a boyfriend who used drugs heavily, and he seemed to be always hanging out with Anderson.

Naturally, everyone assumed that he also smoked weed because of the company he kept. One afternoon Anderson was hanging out with these two friends. The girl asked him if he smoked, and he feared he would sound uncool if he told the truth.

So, he told her he did smoke marijuana. Before he knew it, she had a joint out of her pocket and lit it, offering him a hit. This was his first encounter with any drug, and it didn’t take long for the drug addiction to snowball.

Plan B in Life Came with Serious Consequences

His senior year was supposed to be the highlight of his life, but he failed his final exams. He could not go to college, and his plan B was to travel the world and gain a new perspective. Anderson felt that no one would think anything different of him if he left the area.

Many people travel and put off college for a few years. He didn’t want to be known as someone who failed, but the drug addiction to marijuana was already affecting his life. His parents didn’t have the funds to help him travel, so he became a stowaway to get to Europe. Anderson grew up in the Ghana port city of Takoradi, so it was easy for him to stow away and emigrate to another country.

The only problem is that this is a hazardous way to travel. At this point, his drug addiction took a turn for the worse. Being a stowaway sounds innocent enough. But it’s very tough, and you can quickly lose your life.

Anderson tried to make it the best he could, but the only way he could keep his morale was to use both drugs and alcohol. At night, he had to use a small canoe in the sea, and if the canoe capsized, you must swim to shore. You will perish in the cold waters if you’re not strong enough to make it.

Alcohol and drugs gave him the confidence to keep up with this process, but the addiction only grew. He could do nothing about it, as he had made the wrong decision, and now his drug addiction and choices were ruining his life.

Enough Was Enough, the Journalist Said of Drug Addiction!

Seven long years passed, and Anderson still hadn’t done anything with his life. He never made it to the local university; at this point, depression set in. If you know anything about drug addiction and depression, you will see that they often run together.

According to a National Library of Medicine study, about 46 percent of people with addiction also have depression issues. Some centers treat both as this dual diagnosis is hard to manage. For Anderson, things became unbearable.

So many people find that the drug isn’t working anymore and need more of the same thing to cope with the pain. It was at this point that he made a life-altering declaration. He was done!

Anderson felt like he was losing himself as the dream to travel never happened, and he no longer enjoyed doing drugs. He called these atomic habits, and he was determined to conquer them. He finally got the opportunity to go through the Sahara Desert and eventually make it to Europe.

Sadly, even on this journey, he faced significant risks, but he knew he had to try at least because he was losing himself to substance abuse. During this long journey, he gave up his drug addiction once and for all.

Three Steps to Form New Habits to Combat Drug Addiction

Anderson was delighted when he finally made it to the United Kingdom. He knew that it was time to make some much-needed changes. Like so many folks find themselves, Anderson was stuck between pain and pleasure and couldn’t escape.

The problem was that he didn’t feel pleasure or satisfaction anymore. Anderson wasn’t improving his life because his drug addiction was worsening things.

Anderson knew that if he wanted to start the journey toward sobriety, he must break free from the addiction. He used the pain caused by the addiction to motivate himself. These are the steps he took.

1. Change the Atmosphere

Anderson realized he couldn’t stop his addiction if he didn’t remove himself from the situation. It wasn’t until he got to Europe that he felt sobriety was possible because his environment was different. He began his journey towards positive thinking and could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

2. Focus on the Future

By this time, Anderson had wasted most of his life. He needed to become focused on his future as a journalist. With this weight on his back, he knew he would never become anything, so he had to free himself from the entanglement. Positive thinking and declaring where he was going helped him realize his mind was powerful in beating the drug addiction.

3. Staying the Course

Conquering drug addiction is one of the most challenging things you can do in this life. However, you must stick to the course. When you try to break free from such a powerful hold, many chains will try to hold you back.

Positive thinking and a made-up mind will keep you from backsliding. You can only be free if you commit to your new habits, no matter how tempting your old life might seem.

Why Does the Pain/Pleasure Analysis Mean So Much?

For Anderson, it was the pain/pleasure analysis he used to rationalize his way free from addiction. He knew that his habit was causing him way more pain than pleasure. It wasn’t until he reached that point that he could obtain sobriety.

So many times, family members and friends try to push people to get help and fight their addiction, but the person isn’t ready. Until they get to the point where they realize that the drug is ruining their life, they won’t get help. No therapy, screaming sessions from his parents, or endless begging from his friends made any difference to Anderson.

It wasn’t until he could see the damage the drugs did to him that things changed. He had to use positive thinking to combat all the negativity that comes with addiction, but it worked.

Anderson’s journey had some unique aspects, but it was challenging, just like so many others face. He learned that breaking a bad habit takes a ton of work and dedication, as it’s much easier to create good ones.

He also learned that the crowd you hang around means everything. You can’t get sober amidst other drug users, as you must remove yourself from the atmosphere to stop the temptation. According to the National Survey on Drug Use and Health, more than 8.5 million American adults with addiction also have a mental illness. Treating this mental health issue is imperative for the journey toward sobriety.

Final Thoughts on a Journalist Using Positive Thinking to Make Healthy New Habits and Beat Drug Addiction

Anderson says you can overcome this battle if you struggle with drug addiction. You must first decide that you need help and then take the first step towards getting it. You know you’ve had enough when you see that the drug is ruining your life and not helping anymore.

Anderson offers this advice:

“Whatever life you’re living reflects what’s going on in you. To have a great life means having your internal world under control. You do that by ensuring you engage in things that bring you peace. And if trying to do it demands you get come people out of your life because of their ways, you do it.”

It’s not until a person reaches this point that they can receive the help they need. For example, Emmanuel Anderson needed to experience the worst time of his life before he could move in the right direction. Today, he’s a journalist with a successful career–and an exciting new life in Spain. But his life could have been very different if he hadn’t decided that he was done with the lifestyle and formed new habits to break through drug addiction.

Undersharing With Your Partner Leads to Isolation, According to Psychology

August 1, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

You’ve likely heard that you shouldn’t reveal too much information, but that shouldn’t be the case in your relationship. Society makes it seem like you must hide your feelings and never say when something is wrong. However, undersharing with your partner is detrimental to your relationship and overall communication.

When you experience negative emotions like anger, fear, anxiety, or despair, it’s natural to want to keep them quiet. You won’t want your significant other to see you that way, but keeping it to yourself is harmful to you and your relationship. While you don’t want to upset your partner, you also don’t want to disrupt your mental health by keeping quiet.

Undersharing with your significant other does more harm than good. It can lead to isolation, and you might not realize it until it’s too late. Vulnerability and sharing your feelings are sometimes the best thing you can do.

What is Undersharing?

Humans constantly communicate, even when you don’t realize you’re doing it. You communicate nonverbally through the following:

facial expressions
body language
voice tone
behavior

If you withhold your thoughts, your significant other still knows something is wrong. They will recognize that something is bothering you and know you’re undersharing. You might say nothing is wrong or give a vague answer rather than opening up and being honest.

Five Key Reasons for Undersharing

Every relationship is different, and there are a few reasons for undersharing. These reasons for undersharing all interfere with your relationship strength.

1 – Trust Issues Causes Myriad Communication Breakdowns

A lack of trust in your relationship can lead to undersharing. If you aren’t transparent or question things your significant other does, it can cause feelings of isolation. You must have trust in one another to make things work.

2 – Living a Busy Lifestyle

Life gets busy for everyone, and it can interfere with the strength of your relationship. You might be dealing with tight deadlines, stress at work, conflicting schedules, or other overwhelming situations. When you get home after a busy day, you want to relax and pretend everything is okay. However, since it’s not okay, it leads to internalizing and adversely affecting your relationship.

3 – Trauma Can Cause Undersharing

A traumatic event or shocking situation can change the dynamics of your relationship. Rapid and sudden life changes throw everything off, including your ability to connect.

Some traumatic events that can lead to undersharing with your significant other include the following:

The loss of a loved one
Sudden grief
Job loss
Accidents
Illnesses
Health scares

4 – Engaging in Unhealthy Relationship Behaviors

If you or your significant other engage in unhealthy behaviors, it can lead to undersharing and feelings of isolation. Some of these behaviors include:

Avoiding confrontation
Keeping secrets
Infidelity
Constant fighting
Trying to control your significant other
Forcing change
Co-dependence
Not leaning on them in times of need
Being unwilling to make sacrifices
Trying to hurt one another in daily interactions
Frequent criticism

5 – You Don’t Want to Burden Your Partner

Sometimes you keep things to yourself because you don’t want to be a burden. You don’t want your significant other to have to carry your load, so you don’t tell them what’s going on. However, you must remember that your partner wants to help if you’d let them.

Why Undersharing with Your Partner Leads to Isolation

Now that we see what causes this gap of communication, here is how it can lead you to an isolated place.

1 – It Only Allows for a Superficial Connection

Sharing with your partner allows you to feel connected, improving your well-being. When you reveal your thoughts and feelings, it promotes a meaningful bond between you. Without this level of communication, you’ll only find a superficial connection.

2 – You’ll Feel Like No one Values You

When you can’t or won’t reveal yourself, you’ll feel like no one values you or your successes. It leads to isolation because you feel like you’re on your own. Feeling like your significant other doesn’t recognize your value can cause resentment.

3 – Undersharing Can Cause Toxicity or a Break-Up

Undersharing causes conflict in the relationship. It can lead to toxic or unhealthy behaviors and even cause the relationship to end.

4 – It Interferes with Growth and Intimacy

When you under share, it leads to a communication breakdown. One or both partners stop talking about important things, sometimes stopping talking altogether. You might feel like you can’t talk to them without it becoming an argument. When this occurs, you can’t grow as a couple and will experience a lack of intimacy.

5 – This Communication Gap Might Mean You Grow Apart

Not communicating and opening up to your partner interferes with your connection. Without understanding each other’s inner thoughts, your relationship can’t evolve. Eventually, you’ll grow apart and feel alone until you either break up or fix the issues.

6 – Undersharing Leads to Toxic Behaviors

Undersharing exacerbates issues, and you can’t ignore it. Eventually, it’ll go beyond keeping things to yourself and can turn into hostility and harmful behavior.

Some signs that it’s gone too far include:

constant criticism from one or both of you
belittling each other
giving or receiving the cold shoulder
defensiveness
passive-aggressive behaviors
assuming you know what your significant other thinks, and your partner assuming they know what you think
inability to resolve arguments
no longer attempting to connect
inability to compromise

7 – Your Partner Can’t Understand Who You Are

When you under share, your significant other doesn’t have a chance to understand who you are. They won’t know what you need or how they can help you through hard times. Eventually, you’ll start to think that they can’t help, although you never gave them a chance to try.

8 – You’ll Feel Like You’re the Only One Going Through Hard Times

When you undershare with your significant other, you’ll quickly experience loneliness and isolation. It causes you to feel like you’re the only person going through negative emotions. When you feel this way for too long, it can make you feel flawed and alone. It only leads to you isolating yourself so your partner doesn’t see that you’re not in a great place.

9 – Missed Opportunities for Finding Solutions

If you don’t open up to your partner, you miss out on the chance to find a solution together. You’ll continue grappling alone, spiraling until you’re dealing with more than you can handle. Feeling stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed can cause you to miss seeing your strengths and resources. Sharing the problem with your partner gives you another person who can offer suggestions.

10 – Undersharing Creates Negative Self Talk

If you don’t talk to someone about your thoughts and feelings, it can lead to negative self-talk. Keeping all of your emotions in can cause toxicity, including shame, to build up within. It also makes you feel embarrassed, weak, unworthy, and unlovable because your thoughts convince you of these things.

When you feel all of this, it causes tension and negativity within your relationship. Your partner will know something is wrong, and you’ll isolate yourself to hide it.

11 – Your Partner Will Think They Did Something Wrong

You might not say anything, but your partner will pick up on your body language and demeanor. They’ll know something is wrong, but they won’t know what it is unless you tell them.

Otherwise, they must guess what’s wrong and think they did something wrong. Your partner might believe they did something to upset you, causing them to become more concerned the longer you withhold.

12 – Other Effects of Undersharing

There are many effects of undersharing, making it highly detrimental to your relationship and well-being. Some of the other results include:

Lack of intimacy
Difficulty reaching goals
Increased conflict
Feeling unseen
Turning away from one another
Developing a negative perspective of one another

How to Fix It and Improve Communication

The only way to develop a deep connection with your partner is by opening up to them. Let go of the idea that you’re oversharing and embrace feeling seen, heard, and cared for as you are. It might be uncomfortable initially, but the bond it creates is worth every moment.

1 – Learn New Communication Strategies

If you can learn how to connect with your partner, you’ll have an easier time sharing your life with them. You’ll want to tell them the details of your day and the problems you’re experiencing. Find ways that work for both of you, and you’ll become more comfortable sharing.

2 – Practice Identifying and Feeling Your Emotions So You Can Communicate Them

When you become comfortable experiencing your emotions, it gets easier to talk about them. It’ll take time, so start small or seek guidance from a therapist.

3 – Advocate For Yourself, Communicate, and Set Boundaries

Speak up for yourself, and don’t be afraid to reveal your truths. When you advocate for yourself, it enforces your boundaries, allowing you to feel comfortable and respected. If your partner doesn’t know how you feel or think, they won’t know when they’re crossing a line.

4 – Learn Your Partner’s Attachment Styles

The attachment theory refers to a person’s way of handling relationships. It’s based on how they received care early in their life. Each person’s style can offer insight into how they communicate.

Final Thoughts on Undersharing with Your Partner Leads to Isolation, According to Psychology

Undersharing with your partner can cause more issues than you might initially realize. It prevents you from forming a deep bond with your partner and can create tension and further problems. No matter the reason for your undersharing, you must overcome and find a way to fix it. If you want to connect with your significant other and develop a lasting connection, it’s time to open up.

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