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15 Hidden Manipulation Behaviors That Reveal a Controlling Person

July 7, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

A controlling person exhibits hidden manipulation behaviors that you might not recognize immediately. While you might envision an aggressive person, that’s not always the case. There are other subtle signs that someone might be manipulative you might not know about. In fact, these hidden manipulation behaviors speak volumes.

All relationships, romantic or otherwise, involve some social influence. However, no one should have control over aspects of your life. They shouldn’t want to change you or the things you love, either.

Remember that this situation doesn’t only affect romantic relationships. You can experience hidden manipulation behaviors from your friends, family members, your boss, or anyone else in your life.

Once you recognize the hidden manipulation behaviors that reveal a dominating person, you can learn how to deal with it. No matter the reason for this behavior, it’s not okay, and you should find a way to overcome it.

How a Manipulative person Controls People

A manipulator wants to use people for their benefit. They create a power imbalance and use other people to serve their agenda. They use psychological manipulation to take control over you and your life.

A controlling person wants to have power and make you ask for benefits or privileges. When this happens, it’s safe to say that the relationship is unhealthy. They want control over the details of other people’s lives, crossing a line into abusiveness.

If someone makes you feel embarrassed, inconsequential, or humiliated, it’s time to reassess. Think about your relationship with them and if they behave in the ways mentioned below. If you can identify the hidden manipulation behaviors, you can protect yourself.

Fifteen Hidden Manipulation Behaviors

These hidden manipulation behaviors can help you identify a dominating person in your life. You deserve people who love you for who you are and want the best for you. The following manipulation behaviors show that someone only wants to use you for their benefit.

1. They Do Favors, But Hidden Manipulation Expects Something in Return

A controlling person will do nice things for you, even when you don’t ask them to do it. However, they’ll expect a favor in return. If you don’t do what they want, they’ll make you feel guilty and continually remind you of what they did for you.

Once you repay one favor, they’ll continue the cycle and keep you indebted to them. They’ll also bring up the favors, sometimes listing them all, anytime you don’t give them their way.

2. They Pressure You Before You’re Ready

A manipulator controls you by pressuring you to decide before you’re ready. They give you little time to think things through, sometimes demanding an immediate answer. It’s their way of forcing you to do what they want because you don’t have time to consider the alternative.

3. They Only Want to Meet in Their Space

Dominating people prefer to meet where they are comfortable. They’ll choose places they feel in control, allowing them to dominate you. These areas might include their office, home, car, or any other space they own.

If they can’t meet you in one of these places, they’ll choose another spot where they’re comfortable. You’ll notice they always decide on a place you’re unfamiliar with.

4. Hidden Manipulation Pretends Not to Understand

Manipulative people often pretend ignorance, acting like they don’t understand what you want. They’ll pretend they don’t know what you want them to do or what they should do.

When they behave this way, it forces you to take on their responsibilities with yours. They also do it to make you uncomfortable or upset.

5. They Give Negative Information Without Warning

A dominating person will spring negative information on you without warning. They do it this way to disrupt your balance and gain an advantage.

Sometimes they’ll return on a deal they agreed to, but only after receiving what they wanted. Or, they’ll do it as you’re already working on your end of the deal.

Other times, the person will surprise you with the information that they can’t do something they said they would. They often give this information at an inconvenient time, such as at the last minute. This type of person doesn’t want you to have time to prepare for a change.

6. They Act Like the Expert on Everything

These people act like they’re more knowledgeable than others. They frequently tell people facts, statistics, and information that not everyone knows. You’ll notice that they only do it when it can give them an advantage over others.

Manipulative people use this tactic in financial, professional, and personal situations. They want to gain power over you by making it seem like they know more.

7. They Want Everything Their Way

If someone in your life won’t compromise on even minor issues, it’s a hidden manipulation behavior. They want you to wear what they like and do what they want. What you need or want won’t matter because they want everything their way.

8. Hidden Manipulation Does Not Admit to Blame

A manipulator typically refuses to accept blame. They don’t want to admit when they made a mistake, even when the situation is their issue. No matter what occurred, they refuse to accept blame.

Sometimes they’ll even blame you for causing them to make a mistake. The person will say you distracted them or interfered in some other way. Other times, they’ll blame you for things you weren’t even present for.

9. They Keep Pushing Even After You Say No

A dominating person isn’t good at accepting healthy boundaries. Even after you say no or clear your feelings, they’ll keep pushing and trying to change your mind.

This person won’t care about the situation or why you’re saying no. They all care about getting their way no matter what it takes.

10. Manipulative People Give the Silent Treatment

Someone who purposely ignores you is likely a controlling person. They’ll not respond to your phone calls, text messages, emails, or other methods of communication. It helps them feel superior because it makes you wait on them.

They also like that it places uncertainty in your mind, making you doubt yourself. These people use the silent treatment to gain control over you.

11. They Tell Mean Jokes to Make You Feel Weak

Manipulators make rude comments disguised as humor. They know these comments will upset you, and they do it to make you feel inferior and insecure. If someone makes mean jokes and makes you question yourself, you must find a way to handle it.

Controlling people to behave this way makes you look and feel bad. Some of the things they comment on include your:

Appearance
Possessions
Education
Credentials
Background
Fitness level

12. Hidden Manipulation Distorts the Truth

A dominating person manipulates the facts to distort the truth. They deny your reality and gain power with dishonesty. Some of the things they do include:

Lying
Making excuses
Being two-faced
Withholding information
Exaggerating
Understating

13. They’re Unpredictable and Moody

You never know what a manipulative person will do next or how they will behave. They keep you guessing so that you stay focused on them. Their moods change drastically, causing you to question where you stand with them.

14. They Raise Their Voice and Exhibit Negativity

Controlling people often raise their voices during discussions. They think that if they speak loudly or exhibit negative behavior, you’ll give in to what they want. These people will also likely stand during the discussion or use animated gestures.

15. They Do Anything to Be the Center of Attention

A manipulative person always wants to be the center of attention. If you experience a victory, they’ll rush in to try and upstage you. They also create drama to get people to pay attention to them.

If you talk about something exciting, they’ll overshadow it with their life issues. They’ll change the subject and talk about something that went wrong for them. When they do this, they’re trying to get you to feel bad for them, ruining your moment.

Tips on How to Handle Manipulative People

At some point, everyone deals with a manipulative person who wants to control their life. Whether it’s your boss, a family member, a friend, or your spouse, you must learn how to handle it. If one method doesn’t work, try the next, and keep going until you achieve the desired results.

If the behavior is manageable, you can talk to the offender. Tell them how you feel, avoiding placing blame. If talking to them doesn’t work, try the following:

Walk away until they calm down
Refuse to give in
Stop reading the text messages or emails they send
Set and enforce boundaries
Be clear about what you think is happening

You might need to end the relationship if nothing seems to ease the situation. You deserve happiness, and the people in your life shouldn’t interfere with that. If you can’t eliminate it, limit your time with that person or ensure there’s always a third-party present.

Final Thoughts on Hidden Manipulation Behaviors That Reveal a Controlling Person

If someone makes you feel bad about yourself, it’s a sign of hidden manipulation behaviors. Please don’t ignore your feeling because It’s there for a reason.

These behaviors can help you identify a controlling person in your life. Don’t let the situation continue, or it’ll create more significant issues in your life. You deserve people who care about you, so don’t settle for anything less.

10 Ways to Tell If You’re Living the Life You Deserve

July 7, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

You deserve to live the best, most meaningful life possible. If you’re unsure if you’re living it, take a moment to assess your life. These signs will help you see if you’re living the fulfilled life you deserve.

It’s easy to look at your life and see the things that didn’t work out as planned. You might recall a person you lost, a goal you didn’t achieve, or a dream that didn’t work out. Everyone has these moments, but you shouldn’t fixate on them.

When you fixate on the things that didn’t work out, you’ll always feel empty or sad. You’ll lose meaning and feel unfilled, searching for something to help you feel better. It’s time to stop looking for fulfillment from outside sources because it’s already within.

These feelings indicate that you aren’t living the meaningful life you deserve. If you think that’s the case for you, these signs can help you identify areas of your life that need work. Or, they’ll help you realize that you’re already living a meaningful life.

Ten Signs of a Meaningful Life

These signs can help you determine if you’re living the meaningful life you deserve. Life is short, and it goes by fast, so you must make the most of each day.

1 – You Have Enough of What You Need

Think about your life and how many of the essentials you have. You’re already off to a good start if you have food to eat, clean water to drink, and a roof over your head.

Next, consider whether your vital organs are functioning and intact. If so, that’s another blessing that shows you have a chance at a healthy life.

You might think these things are minimal and don’t signify a meaningful life, but they are plenty. Many people don’t have these things, so don’t lose sight of the blessings in your life. Let these necessities be enough when you’re going through a hard time, and you’ll always have something to be thankful for.

2 – You Have People Who Cherish You and Want Build a Meaningful Life With You

When you feel empty, take a moment to think about all the people who care about you. Consider those who would be affected if you suddenly weren’t in their lives anymore.

Don’t only think about the people who love you deeply and know you intimately. Many other people in the world would be sad about losing you. These people are the ones who appreciate you and know you in different ways.

Think of those who recognize your voice on the phone or smile when they see you. You might think of the person who remembers how you like your coffee or enjoys seeing your life updates. People who see you as a meaningful person don’t always have a deep connection with you.

3 – You Have Responsibilities–and Feel Fulfilled by Them

It’s sometimes hard to think of the daily tasks of your life as meaningful, but they are. The seemingly mundane reality of each day can begin to feel pointless if you don’t have the right mindset. However, even if your life doesn’t match your childhood fantasies, it is still fulfilling if you have priorities.

From making appointments to driving to and from work, you can find meaning in every task. The fulfillment comes from having responsibilities that affect someone else, whether directly or indirectly. Think of the people you impact by following through on your daily commitments.

Even if someone else can do the same thing you do, you still did it. That means that you’re the one who made the difference in this situation. Each day as you fulfill your obligations and responsibilities, you bring more meaning to your life.

4 – You Made Sacrifices for Someone You Cared About

If you ever gave up on a dream, you might still wish you’d made it happen. However, even if you had to give up on something, you can still live a meaningful life today.

You might have had to give up a dream when you had children or got a steady job. Or, you might have had to let go of something you wanted to move to a new location with your spouse. Whatever didn’t go the way you’d dreamt, remember that it is all okay now.

If you have people worth making sacrifices, try to count your blessings. You only made sacrifices to promote the happiness, safety, and well-being of someone you cared about. Some common instances of making sacrifices for someone you cared about include:

Passing on your dream college to be with your high school sweetheart
Not moving for your dream job to care for your parents
Letting go of your wish to have pets because your partner is allergic
Traveling the world because you have children

While it’s easy to dwell on missing the chance or thinking you made the wrong choice, it’s essential that you shift your mindset. Shifting your mindset isn’t to say you should give up on your dreams to benefit others. Instead, it’s to say that it means you had deep, impactful relationships.

These decisions also helped shape your decision-making process while being considerate of others. These seemingly bad decisions show that you’re a good person, and you should never shame yourself for that.

Let it be enough that you have a good life now. Every decision you made led you to the people and places you’ve experienced along the way.

5 – You Couldn’t Control the Things That Went Wrong

When things don’t go how you wanted them to, you might regret the situation later on. However, don’t dwell on things that were beyond your control. If you know you can’t change things, it doesn’t reduce the meaning of your life.

Since the world isn’t perfect, things won’t always work out. Things not going as planned don’t mean that your life isn’t fulfilling. Release the thoughts of things you couldn’t control, and you’ll find the meaning you deserve.

6 – You Embrace Challenges if You Have a Meaningful Life

When you acknowledge something isn’t right for you, it’s time to change. Sometimes you might be afraid to delve in and face the challenge. However, if you can embrace the challenges and see the good in your situation, you live a meaningful life.

Challenges don’t have to be defeating. Instead, they can be the changes that make your life better. Making the most of each challenge can make all the difference. Plus, it helps you make decisions for your future, too.

Making the most of the challenges and using the tools you have right now show that you live a fulfilled life. Then, you can learn to make better choices for the future. These experiences bring meaning, strength, perspective, and wisdom to your life.

7 – You Try to Build Meaningful Routines

Routines enhance your ability to make good choices. When something is important to you, nurture those steps. If you don’t wait until you feel ready, you’ll feel more fulfilled. Jumping in and practicing routines can make all the difference.

Taking small steps can help build momentum, helping you see all that you can accomplish. Each time you fulfill the routine, you’ll experience happiness, grace, pleasure, and excellence. As long as you keep trying, you’ll realize how meaningful your life is.

Building routines also shows a healthy balance between enjoying life and doing meaningful things. It builds a solid foundation for happiness, allowing you to embrace your life. A meaningful life is all about working at it each day, not waiting for the big moments.

8 – You Can Identify the Source of Your Intense Emotions

Intense emotions are part of life, including negative emotions. It shows intelligence if you experience anger, sadness, embarrassment, jealousy, guilt, resentment, fear, or regret. Using these emotions as signals to build emotional processing skills shows that you have a meaningful life.

When you avoid overthinking these emotions, it helps you understand the underlying issue. Then, you can work on making things right. Being able to do this shows that you have a fulfilling life.

9 – A Meaningful Life Means You Value Your Time

Time is a resource that will eventually run out. If you think of time any other way, it can interfere with achieving your personal goals. However, if you value your time, it helps you prioritize your goals and face your problems.

10 – You Don’t Limit Yourself

If you don’t limit yourself to things you couldn’t do in the past, you’re doing well. It helps you let go of your failures as you implement better habits. Removing these limits indicates that you’re doing better than before, and that’s all that matters.

Final Thoughts on Living the Meaningful Life You Deserve

You’ve made it this far in life, and it says so much about you. The aspects of life that you often ignore show that you’re living the meaningful life you deserve. Regardless if life worked out the way you dreamed, you’ve still built a beautiful life.

Your life doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s to be meaningful. Embrace the people and things that mean the most, and focus on bettering yourself each day. You can find meaning everywhere, especially in the repetitive parts of your day.

11 Behaviors People Need to Stop Taking Things Personally

July 6, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

When you keep taking things personally, it can take a toll on your well-being. It can make you feel judged or questioned, even when the other person never meant to offend you. These negative thoughts can be emotionally draining.

Someone can ask a harmless question or make a statement that leaves you feeling upset. Likewise, you might feel like the person thinks less of you. Whatever thoughts run through your mind, it’s sure to make you feel like a victim.

Sometimes, you might even take it personally when someone is too busy to see you all the time. It can make you assume the worst, going so far as to think someone doesn’t like you. However, reflecting on your behavior can help you stop taking things personally.

You can adapt some behaviors that allow you to stop taking things personally. Adopting these behaviors helps you develop and grow while building your self-esteem simultaneously.

The Negative Thoughts That Cause Taking Things Personally

There are a few reasons people continually take things personally. The reasons vary for everyone, but some include:

Being insecure
Misinterpreting a conversation
Defensiveness
Feeling an attack on their character, abilities, or competence
Having their achievements diminished
Being disrespected or mistreated

While you can’t control what other people say and do, you can control how you react. Please don’t blame yourself or assume that you’re the reason for their behavior. Whether the things they say are true or untrue, you can choose to disregard or internalize them.

When you internalize, it leads to taking things personally. However, disregarding the words allows you to push away negativity and self-limiting beliefs.

Eleven Ways to Stop Taking Things Personally

Taking things personally can hinder your ability to pursue your goals or engage in your passions. Learning to let go helps you take control of your response, emotions, and energy level.

1. Create Some Space Before Taking Things Personally

When you feel offended, create some space before reacting. Allow yourself to calm down before returning to the situation. By doing so, you can prevent yourself from lashing out in anger, frustration, or pain.

While taking your space, reflect on the situation and see if you reacted negatively. You might realize that the other person wasn’t judging you or being condescending.

Additionally, remember that you don’t know everything about the situation. You don’t know what’s on the other person’s mind or what else they’re dealing with. Whether it’s about you or not, taking time before reacting can make a difference.

2. Focus on Self-Compassion

Self-compassion can help you stop taking things personally. When you’re hard on yourself, it’s easy to become offended by what someone else says.

However, you can choose not to take negative comments personally with self-compassion. It’ll help you stay positive even when another person is rude or insensitive.

When someone is rude to you, you can shift the situation. You can choose not to let it in, allowing you to take control of your emotions and mindset.

3. Change Your Self-Talk from Negative Thoughts to Positive

When you take someone’s statement personally, it often confirms a negative self-thought. The words trigger you because you already feel inferior in that area of life. If this is the case for you, it’s time to shift your mindset and adjust your self-talk.

Rather than think of yourself as messy, consider yourself creative. If you tell yourself you’re not a good cook, remember your other skills. While you can’t be good at everything, you can shift from negative thinking to positivity.

You can stop taking things personally by focusing on what you’re good at. Everyone has flaws and weaknesses, but you shouldn’t fixate on them.

4. Stay Busy

When you don’t have anything to do, it’s easy to let your mind wander to negative thoughts and emotions. This negativity often links to things other people said or about you. Instead of letting your thoughts get the best of you, find ways to stay busy.

Spend your time wisely, doing productive things you enjoy. It keeps you too busy to care what other people say and stops a cycle of negative thinking.

If you aren’t sure what to do to stay busy, think about what you enjoy doing. You can take a class, sign up for a club, or join a team. Or, you can do home-improvement projects to improve your environment while staying busy.

5. Question Your Negative Thoughts and Beliefs

If you greet someone and they don’t respond, you might think it’s because they don’t like you. However, you must question that thought because you don’t know if it’s true.

Instead, the person may not have seen you or didn’t have time to recognize you. Or, maybe they were lost in thought and didn’t even acknowledge that anyone greeted them. Your negative thoughts and beliefs lead to misinterpretation, causing you to take things personally.

6. Know Yourself and Your Worth

If you know yourself and your worth, it’ll boost your confidence. It helps you understand who you are, allowing you to ignore comments that say otherwise. Knowing yourself helps you push away negativity rather than taking it personally.

When you know your worth, it prevents you from believing what other people say about you. Even when they say something passive-aggressive, you’ll be resilient to their attempt to hurt you. Knowing your worth lays a solid foundation for what you need to stop taking things personally.

7. Don’t Reply with Negative Thoughts

When someone disrespects you, don’t respond in the same way. Avoid further toxicity and negativity because it’ll make you part of the problem. It might make you feel good momentarily, but it’ll make you feel bad later.

If you can remember to be mature and respond respectfully, it’ll help you stop taking things personally. You’ll feel better about who you are, too, boosting your confidence.

8. Accept That Not Everyone Will Like you, and It’s Okay

Everyone is different, and that means not everyone will like you. However, don’t take it personally because it’s not worth changing who you are. You can’t force everyone to like you, and you don’t need their approval.

Think about why you take it personally, and then focus on the root of the problem. If you want someone’s approval because you want everyone to like you, shift your mindset. You don’t need everyone to like you, and it’ll never happen anyway, so learn to be resilient when it happens.

Sometimes you’ll want someone to like you because they are a friend or family member of someone you care about. In this case, you must remember that their opinion of you doesn’t change who you are. Even if you’d enjoy their approval, you don’t need it, and you still know your self-worth.

Make an effort to stop caring what other people think about you. It’s not always easy, but you must stay true to yourself and let go of those who don’t embrace it.

9. Be Assertive But Kind

You can be kind while still being assertive. Many people believe that assertiveness is a way to be mean, but it’s not true. Instead, it means standing up for yourself or something you care about.

If someone says untrue things about you, being assertive can end it. Declare the lies and half-truths for what they are, and make it clear that you have boundaries. It helps you regain control of the situation and your response processes.

If you take things personally because you don’t get something you want or deserve. When this happens, it’s up to you to be assertive and ask for it.

Maybe you want your partner to stop bringing something up, but you haven’t asked them. You must speak up and let the other person know that their actions or words cause pain because they might not realize it.

10. Remember That It’s Not About You

When someone is insensitive and says harsh things, it’s often not about you. Sometimes a rude person might be having a bad day and takes it out on whoever they can. Or, they might struggle with self-esteem and confidence and feel better about themselves when they’re mean to others.

11. Ask for Clarification to Eliminate Taking Things Personally

If you know the person well enough, speak up and ask for clarification. When they say something upsetting, it’s best to ask what they meant or intended. You may have misinterpreted the situation, and giving them a chance to explain can prevent future issues.

Plus, asking for clarification prevents you from overthinking the situation later. You either get the answer you wanted or recognize a person you should eliminate from your life. The people in your life shouldn’t intentionally hurt you, so getting clarification can help.

Final Thoughts on the Behaviors That Help Someone to Stop Taking Things Personally

Taking things personally can negatively affect your confidence levels and sense of self-worth. It can also interfere with the progress you make toward your goals.

Rather than letting words bring you down, learn to stop taking things personally. Remember that it’s often not about you at all, and even when it is, it doesn’t change who you are. Let go of things that bring you down, and focus on all the good instead.

9 Ways to Manifest a Positive Change

July 6, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Life is a blessing, but it can also be challenging sometimes. It’s easy to focus on negative thinking when things get hard, although it won’t help. Instead, find ways to manifest positive change in your life to improve the situation. How? By unlocking the Law of Attraction.

Manifesting positive change will improve your life in ways you never expected. You can quickly shift your mindset when you face challenges or experience negative thinking. With positive thoughts, anything is possible, and you’ll find fulfillment.

If you struggle to overcome negative thinking, making these changes in your life can make a difference. You don’t have to let negativity hold you back and hinder your happiness. Instead, make a positive change and live the life of your dreams.

Manifesting positive change in life takes dedication and persistence. You must develop new habits and avoid reverting to old habits. You can do it, though, and you’ll find the changes joyful.

What is Manifesting?

You’ll be happy to know you can manifest anything in life, including positivity and change. It takes commitment and self-discipline to stick to the positive changes. However, there will be no looking back once you realize how effective the differences are.

Manifesting is the process you use to bring your desires to reality. Your thoughts, dreams, and goals can become real if you display them with positive change. It involves the Law of Attraction that states “like attracts like,” so positivity brings beneficial change.

To attract good things into your life, you must have matching energy. Your energy must remain positive to reach your goals and accomplish your desires. Recognize that all good things come from within, and you won’t find them elsewhere.

How to Manifest Positive Change in Life

Staying positive is a choice; you can manifest positive change in your life daily. Learning how to choose each day will change your life and help you find happiness.

1. Visualize How You Want the Next Day to Play Out

Before going to bed each night, visualize how you want the next day to go. Think positively as you envision the next day, making it easier to make positive choices. Doing this before bed can help the thoughts and feelings solidify in your subconscious. Plus, falling asleep with a positive mindset allows you to wake up in the same state.

2. Use Positive Affirmations

Positive affirmations can help in all aspects of your life. Using them to manifest positive change can help you eliminate negative thinking and focus on good things instead. They help you develop a positive mindset, allowing you to attract everything you want and need.

If you come up with your affirmations, make sure they are:

In the present tense
Focused on positivity
Realistic

If you’d prefer to use pre-created affirmations, plenty are available online. You can repeat them exactly or alter them to fit your situation.

Use affirmations in the morning as you prepare for the day, allowing you to start on the right path. You can also use them at night to release negativity from the day and help you sleep better. Plus, using them throughout the day can help keep your mind focused on the good, even when things go wrong.

3. Practice Gratitude to Unlock the Law of Attraction

Gratitude can make every aspect of your life better. If you live with negative or anxious thoughts, think about the things that mean the most to you. Please don’t focus on what could go wrong or isn’t working out because it’ll cause you to think you’re lacking.

With gratitude, you’ll feel like anything is possible. Implement daily gratitude practices into your life, and you’ll feel better each time. Some of the ways you can practice thankfulness include:

Take a deep breath in and out while envisioning three things you’re grateful for
Keeping a gratitude journal near your bed for a daily list
Writing letters to people who have helped you

Focusing on gratitude allows you to attract more positivity into your life. Setbacks or obstacles will seem more accessible to overcome when you know that you have good things no matter what.

4. Implement a Morning Routine to Make Positive Change

A morning routine can be life-changing because it starts you out on a positive note. You get to choose how you want your day to go. Of course, that all starts with a good routine. A morning routine shows that you’re committed to making positive changes in your life and will encourage you throughout the day.

Without a routine, you might hit snooze a few times, unhappily drag yourself out of bed, and rush to get ready. This process is stressful, and it starts your day off negatively.

Instead, try getting up early, getting ready with minimal stress, and beginning your day on time. The positive change will improve your life because your days will be more positive. How you start your day can make a difference in manifesting positive change. It’ll keep your mindset positive and influence the rest of your day.

5. Avoid Negative Content When You Want to Make Positive Change

The things you fill your mind with affect every part of your life. If you constantly take in harmful content, you’ll acquire unhelpful thoughts. IF you want to manifest positive change in life, you must consume positive content instead.

If harmful content affects your life, consider doing the following to harness the Law of Attraction:

Listen to uplifting music
Follow positive social media accounts
Read inspiring books
Find positive news sources
Listen to positive podcasts
Turn off your electronics when harmful content seems constant

Sometimes, avoiding harmful content requires avoiding the news altogether. Delete the news apps from your phone, and limit your time on websites. Negative information can cause fear-based thinking and negativity, so it’s best to stop indulging in it.

6. Envision Positive Change on a Vision Board

A vision board gives you positive reminders of what you want in life. It helps you envision your dreams, allowing you to turn them into realistic goals. Vision boards help you attach emotion to your goals, giving you something to direct your energy on.

Vision boards are fun to create and help you think about what you truly want out of life. Once it’s on your board, you’ll be more likely to develop an operational plan that helps you get there. Plus, it allows you to push away negative thoughts because you’ll have your eye on the prize.

7. Find Something Positive in Every Situation

When things aren’t going as planned, it’s easy to focus on negativity. However, you’ll manifest positive change if you find something positive in these situations.

Staying positive allows you to look for options you wouldn’t have considered otherwise. Plus, it helps you keep an open mind as you work through the obstacles. You can find good aspects in any situation, even when hurt or devastated.

Making it a habit can make all the difference as it’ll help you remember that the world is still good. Finding the positive aspect doesn’t invalidate the situation but gives you enlightenment. If you can’t think of anything else, you can find a beneficial life lesson in the experience.

8. Go for Regular Walks Outside

Daily exercise is good for your mental and physical health and can help manifest positive change. Getting outside makes the experience even more beneficial. Researchers from UC Berkeley found that you’ll experience positive emotions when in the presence of natural beauty.

Further studies show that sunlight benefits your well-being in the following ways:

Improves brain function
Lowers blood pressure
Improves bone health
Lifts moderate depression

Make it a point to go on a 30-minute walk around your neighborhood daily. You can squeeze in a half-hour for walking even when you’re busy.

9. Take a Break from Social Media

You must exude positivity to benefit from the Law of Attraction.

Social media can zap your happiness and cause constant negativity. It can be highly detrimental with scary news articles, comparisons, and online drama. Pay attention to your mood when you use social media. You might find that you could benefit from a social media break.

Aside from a break, you can be more mindful of your social media usage. Set personal boundaries like limiting your time and monitoring who you follow. If specific pages or people make you feel bad, you don’t have to follow or interact with them.

Consider the apps you use, too. If one app brings more negativity than others, get rid of it. Likewise, if you spend too much time on a specific app, set a time limit on your phone. You will receive a notification when you’re getting close to your limit.

Another option is to set times of the day when you can’t use social media. You can choose not to use it during work, dinner, family time, or any time you think it creates negativity. Other beneficial times to avoid it is first thing in the morning and last thing at night.

Final Thoughts on Ways to Manifest Positive Change in Life

If you want to see improvement in your life, it’s time to manifest positive change. Create better habits by implementing some of these ways. You’ll experience increased positivity and happiness, and the Law of Attraction will take care of the rest. Start small by implementing one or two positive changes in your life. Gradually add more methods until you’re living the life of your dreams.

10 Ways to Ask for Help (Even If You Don’t Think You Need It)

July 6, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Everyone needs assistance sometimes, and it’s okay to ask for it. If you’re afraid to ask for help, you must learn how to develop the skill. Even when you tell yourself you don’t need it, there will come a time when it’s necessary.

People need help all the time, including the following instances:

Needing directions in a new location
Not knowing an answer
Needing input from colleagues
Moving something heavy
Tackling an overwhelming task

When you find yourself in one of these situations, it can be uncomfortable if you don’t know how to ask. Or, you might continue telling yourself that you don’t need anyone else, even when it’s clear that you do. Either way, learning to ask for help can make a positive difference in your life.

Why You Think You Don’t Need Help

Before learning how to ask for help, take some time to consider why you think you don’t need it. Some of us are so afraid to ask for help that we struggle alone rather than reaching out. If that’s the case for you, there’s likely an underlying reason.

You might not want to seem weak or needy, especially in front of peers and supervisors. If you work in a competitive environment, your resistance to asking might be more prevalent. You might even tell yourself that asking will be used against you and that people will think you’re incompetent.

Other times you might be embarrassed to ask for help. It can bring out insecurities and make you feel less confident about yourself and your abilities. You’ll worry about what people think of you, so you stick to the thought that you don’t need it.

No matter why you think you don’t need help, remember that you judge yourself more harshly than anyone else. The things you believe about yourself aren’t running through everyone else’s minds. Push away the negative self-talk and speak up when you need it.

Getting help from others has many benefits that you’ll miss out on if you don’t ask. You can learn from others, helping you move ahead quickly and with fewer setbacks.

Why You Should Ask for Help

Asking gives you a new perspective you wouldn’t have considered otherwise. You don’t have to be desperate before you finally reach out. If you recognize a situation that you can’t effectively handle alone, find someone to ask.

When you dare to ask, it helps improve your life and well-being. It promotes self-development, allowing you to become a better version of yourself.

Asking for help also helps build a solid support system in your life. You’ll experience improved well-being, a healthier life, and improved coping skills with a support system. They see things you don’t see, helping you maximize your efforts.

While many people think asking for help signals a weakness, that’s not the case. Instead, reaching out is a sign of strength because it allows you to take control of your life. You don’t let your pride stand in the way of how well you perform.

How to Ask for Help

Now that you’re ready to ask for help, you might be unsure how to do it. These tips will help you request some assistance in a polite, professional, and appropriate way.

1. Take a Risk

If you’re unsure if someone will help you, take the risk and ask them. The worst the person can do is say no, so don’t be afraid of what will happen. It might be uncomfortable for a minute, but it’s better than not trying.

Most people are more than willing to help others, so they will likely say yes anyway. It makes them feel useful, and it promotes happiness within themselves, too. Even if they can’t help, they’ll reply kindly and could suggest someone who can.

2. Don’t Make Them Guess

When asking for help, don’t make the person guess what you want. Make sure you’re clear about what you want to make the assistance beneficial for you both. If you want someone to show you how to do something, tell them so that they don’t do it for you, instead.

Likewise, be clear about whether you need to discuss a topic or if you need help with a task. Sometimes it can be unclear when you’re describing it, and you assume the other person knows. Be as specific as possible so that you get the help you need.

3. Think About the Timing

You don’t want to disrupt someone’s important tasks to ask for help. Consider their work schedule or if they’re busy during a specific part of the day, and avoid asking during those times.

If you’re unsure when a good time would be, you can work around it. Tell the person that you’d like to ask something and you’d like to know when a good time is. The time might be right now, but otherwise, you’ll have a plan that works for both of you.

4. Consider Who the Best Person is to Ask for Help

Once you’ve figured out what you need, be mindful of who you ask. You’ll ask different people based on the kind of help you need. If you require specific information, consider if you know an expert in that area or if you need to seek a professional opinion.

When you need help moving heavy furniture, think about who is strong enough and less likely to have an accident. If you’re unsure who can help you, start by asking around to see if someone you know has an idea. You might have to ask multiple people before getting the help you’re looking for.

5. Offer Assistance to Others

People are more likely to help you if you’ve helped them before. It also makes it easier to ask. When you helped someone in the past, you won’t be as nervous or afraid when it’s your turn to need assistance.

Offer your time and talents to others without making them ask to create a support system you can turn to. You’ve been in the position of needing help, so don’t wait for them to ask before you step in and offer.

6. Be Appreciative and Show Gratitude

Anytime someone helps you remember to show appreciation and gratitude. Thank the person when they accept your request for help and reiterate how much you appreciate it. If possible, reward them for helping you out with a little gift to show how thankful you are.

Being appreciative and thankful is not only polite, but it levels the playing field in a way. If you offer a gift, you won’t feel as indebted to the person who helped you. Plus, it puts you in a position where you can ask for it again when it’s needed.

7. Be Mindful of the Way You Ask for Help

The way you ask makes a difference in the other person’s willingness to lend aid. Be mindful by not making the favor sound like a command. You might have to give context so that the person knows they’re not obligated to help.

Be kind and humble when you ask to promote empathy from the person you ask. It shows that you’re vulnerable, which will make the other person more likely to agree.

Be honest about why you need a hand. Honesty is a sign of respect, and it shows that you’re open-minded and trusting. Be willing to listen and learn from the person who helps you.

8. Explain Why You Need Assistance and What You’ve Already Tried

People are more likely to help you when they know why you need help. Instead of being vague, be specific about why you need their assistance. They’re more likely to say yes because they won’t feel like you’re using them.

Tell them what you’ve already tried so that they know what didn’t work yet. Knowing what you already did can help the person troubleshoot your issue and find a solution.

9. Prepare Them for the Question

Don’t just blurt out that you need help from someone. Instead, prepare the person for the request by telling them that you need to ask for a favor.

The person won’t feel blindsided or like you’re putting them on the spot. It gives them a moment to process what’s coming instead of catching them off guard.

10. Show That You’ve Already Tried on Your Own

People are more likely to help you if they know you’ve already tried. By making it clear that you’ve attempted it, they’ll understand that you did what you could.

They don’t want to feel like you’re asking them to do your work for you. However, the person will be happy to help if they know you gave it a shot.

Final Thoughts on Ways to Ask for Help (Even If You Don’t Think You Need It)

Everyone needs assistance sometimes, so consider what you need and how it could make your life easier. Then be courageous and ask for help. Once you receive the aid, you’ll realize how much it helped your progress. Be appreciative and show gratitude, and you’ll develop a helpful support system.

9 Ways Letting Go of Judgment Can Increase Empathy

July 6, 2022 by Chris Butler

It’s perilous to develop an ego that thinks you’re superior to others. Humans tend to be judgmental by nature, and it’s ingrained in you since birth. Some people tend to be more hypercritical than others, but everyone does it in some capacity. Letting go of this air of superiority can help increase your kindness towards others.

You may not realize the dangers of being so negative all the time, as it can affect your ability to empathize with others. You know you should walk a mile in someone’s shoes before judging them. Yet so many people don’t utilize this ability, and their empathetic side lacks.

The Dangerous Game of Judgment of Others

Assume that you’re at a play at your child’s school. You notice that a family there is not dressed the best. Their clothes are older and faded, and they need a shower. You immediately start to judge them based on their appearance.

You don’t know that these people are homeless and live in their cars due to a job loss. They don’t have access to running water, and showering is a challenge. So, it was hard for them to come, given their circumstances, but they wanted to see their child’s play.

Now, how do you feel about these people? If you knew their story, would you have condemned them so harshly? Passing judgment on others blocks your empathetic abilities, and you can’t be a decent human being when you’re so critical of others.

Nine Ways of Letting Go of Judgment

Since having a critical nature is commonplace in society, it’s not an easy habit to break. Here are some things you can do to stop being so hypercritical and enhance your empathetic side.

1. Never Judge a Book by Its Cover

Being judgmental can be detrimental to all aspects of life. A plumber wanted to take on an apprentice to teach the trade. Two men showed up for the interviews. One man was polished and had a suit on with a resume in hand.

The other person was rather rough-looking, and he was covered in tattoos. The plumber automatically assumed the rougher-looking man wouldn’t be a good worker, so he hired the more polished person. Within a few months, the one who appeared so put together on the outside showed his true colors, and he stole over $20,000.

Feeling regretful, he called the second guy and asked him to work for him. That was over thirty years ago, and he is now running the place after the plumber’s death. When you let go of criticism, you see people differently, as things are never as they seem.

2. Don’t Become the Victim

Have you ever played the victim? Sure, everyone has a time or two in their life when they use this card. Sadly, some folks use it as a crutch and a way to survive.

If you fail, it’s easy to point the finger at everyone else and blame them rather than take responsibility for your wrongdoings. When you blame everyone else, you also become critical and judge them. Why do people feel the need to focus on external circumstances so much?

Did you know that playing the victim is a damaging and self-defeating behavior often tied to some mental weaknesses? According to the National Library of Medicine, you often find this behavior in someone with lower self-esteem, minimal empathy, and the need to control a situation. They can present as selfish or narcissistic.

When you start taking responsibility for your actions, not only will you have personal growth, but you will bring out your compassionate side with yourself and others.

3. Watch Who’s in Your Inner Circle

Birds of a feather always flock together, as you don’t see blue jays hanging out with sparrows. The friends you keep say something about you, and if your friends pass judgment on others, you will feel that it’s acceptable to be so critical. Sure, everyone likes to gossip occasionally, and trash talk can be exciting, but it doesn’t feel good when you’re the topic of interest.

When you alter your inner crowd, you will see a difference in your empathy towards others. You will turn away from toxic gossip and learn to speak positively. Fill your inner circle with positive and ambitious people who have no time to pass judgment on others, as they’re too busy living life to the fullest.

4. Stop Driving Good Folks Away from You

People are attracted to those who are positive and radiate joy. When you’re negative and have a black cloud of doom hanging over you, you will only attract people of the same mindset. You can drive good folks away from you when you have a critical attitude.

5. Don’t Allow Judgment to Cause You to Accumulate Guilt

It seems odd that when you criticize others, you accumulate guilt inside. Have you ever been negative towards someone and then felt guilty about it later? When you don’t know this person’s story, you have no right to be critical or mean towards this individual.

This allows negativity to build inside you from all the guilt you carry. Guilt is a heavy load to carry. How can you show others your compassionate and empathetic side when always pointing out flaws and imperfections? Letting go of these guilty feelings can be an excellent place to start.

6. Live with Consciousness

When you’re consciously aware of the things going on around you, you have a different view of the world. Understanding the true nature of items helps you to realize that everyone is human and fallible, including yourself. Diversity is the spice of life, and the world would be boring if everyone were the same.

Having folks from various cultures, religions, and beliefs different from yours only adds to the dynamic that makes this world a fascinating place. Looking through these lenses of appreciation, you see that it doesn’t equate to judgment.

When you develop this mindset, it becomes more challenging for you to be hypercritical as you appreciate the differences in one another and see them as strengths and not challenges.

7. Think Optimistically When Letting Go

The age-old debate about whether the glass is half-full or half-empty has much bearing on your outlook in life. The beauty is that if you don’t know which side of the debate you fall on, you always have the option of knowing that you can refill the cup at any time. When you develop an optimistic outlook, you start to believe that you can change the future.

So, what if the glass is half-empty? Can you refill it anytime you want? Wouldn’t it be nice if positivity was something that you could attain by the snap of your fingers?

It’s challenging to be positive in such a hostile world, but the good news is you can control the negativity. When you change your mindset and stop allowing yourself to see things through a pessimistic lens, you will change your view of people.

Watch yourself become more empathetic as you let the critical side of you fall by the way. It’s effortless to accept others and their indifference when you’re optimistic.

8. Letting Go of Stereotyping and Labeling

Why do people need to categorize one another and label folks? You define this person as rich, while this one is poor. Why does money equal quality and worth in this life?

According to Dr. Monnica Williams from the Moment US Institute, she states that these behaviors are part of a dysfunctional class system. Using this mindset, you see others you judge at a disadvantaged or advantaged status. When you proximate with many types of people, the stereotypes fall, by the way, as does the attitude of superiority.

Conversely, you don’t need to have a penny to be rich beyond compare. When your heart is full of love and empathy for others, your value is priceless. How many good people have you stopped from entering your life simply because you put them in a category of unworthiness according to your standards?

9. Love One Another As You Love Yourself

Every action you make in this life comes with consequences, whether in your words or thoughts. You know how hurtful it is when you’re the center of gossip, so why do something that would hurt others? When you’re overly critical of people, you will bring the same judgment onto you.

Remember, the Golden Rule says to “Do unto others as you want them to do to you,” If you live by this as a guideline, you will see that the world is a much better place.

Final Thoughts on Increasing Empathy by Letting Go of Judgment

While there are aspects in the world you cannot change, there are many things that you can alter. Take, for instance, a person who needs glasses. Without these corrective lenses, it’s very challenging to see clearly. However, everything suddenly becomes vibrant and focused when they put on their glasses.

Letting go of the blinders of negativity and criticism, you start to see and appreciate the diversity in others. You’re more empathetic to their needs and don’t judge them based on differences. You never know what another person is going through, so be kind.

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