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Famous Psychologist Explains the 8 Stages of Life

Erik Erikson, a famous 20th-century psychologist, popularized the idea that people pass through eight stages of life. Erikson became famous because of his work in developmental psychology and psychoanalysis and his theories behind identity crisis and psychosocial development. He believed that your ego plays a role in your ability to master skills, ideas, and attitudes.

Erikson’s stages of life theory describe how people mature in life and the effect of social interaction. It details the different challenges each person will face during their developmental years. Each stage has conflicting concepts that it focuses on.

An intriguing part of the stages of life theory is that you don’t have to complete one stage to move to the next. If you haven’t finished one, you will still move on to the next stage, but you might not be able to overcome challenges. You will continue to experience consequences from the skipped areas until you figure out how to overcome them.

Erikson didn’t develop this entire theory alone, as Sigmund Freud influenced his work. Freud extensively studied psychosexual theory, and Erikson modified his information from that.

The 8 Stages of Life, Explained by Psychologists

Learning about the stages of life can help you understand human behavior better.

stages of lifeStage 1 – Infancy: Trust vs. Mistrust

The first life stage begins when a person is born and continues until they are between 12 and 18 months old. Infants must overcome the challenge of trust and mistrust. If their needs are promptly met, the infant will develop trust toward their caregiver.

However, if the infant’s needs are unmet, the infant will develop mistrust in others. Mistrust occurs when an infant experiences neglect, hindering their ability to be hopeful in the future. If the infant can develop a sense of trust and security, they will become more trusting later in life.

Stage 2 – Toddlerhood: Autonomy vs. Doubt

When the infancy stage ends, the toddlerhood stage begins. This stage continues until the child is about three years old. The toddler starts learning to do things alone, and if their caregiver offers praise and encouragement, the child develops autonomy.

Toddlers who experience positive and encouraging treatment grow into strong-willed individuals with a sense of independence and self-belief. They will develop essential life skills more quickly and increase their safe risk-taking skills. Plus, they will feel confident as they explore the world around them and figure things out.

However, if a toddler is discouraged or made fun of for doing things alone, they will develop self-doubt. They will feel ashamed and unsafe, discouraging them from trying new things. Children in this situation tend to become insecure and dependent.

Stage 3 – Preschool Years: Initiative vs. Guilt

The preschool years begin when a child is three years old and continues until they turn five. Children of this age range focus on doing things for themselves and setting goals. During this time in their life, the child should be around other children their age.

With encouragement from a caregiver, the preschool-aged child will grow into a person with initiative and a purpose. If they experience criticism instead, they will develop feelings of guilt.

Stage 4 – Early School Years: Industry vs. Inferiority

Between the ages of five and 12, children go through the industry vs. inferiority stage. During this time, the child experiences an increase in self-awareness. When the things that they do academically and in sports receive praise, they will feel industrious.

The child becomes more aware of the people around them, too. They begin to compare themselves to others and use social interaction to establish individuality. Their self-confidence and self-esteem will improve with a positive support system.

On the other hand, if they fail academically or during extra-curricular activities, they will experience inferiority. It could also lead to feelings of inferiority if they don’t receive praise when they feel like they did a good job. They will doubt their self-worth and feel overly criticized.

negative influenceStage 5 – Adolescence: Identity vs. Role Confusion

Adolescence occurs from the age of twelve and continues until the child becomes an adult at 18. As the child tries to figure out who they are and their goals, they try different personalities.

If a child is ignored or given too much responsibility during this time, they won’t figure out their identity. It can cause a sense of confusion about their goals and needs. They might feel like their parents or society as a whole expects them to be a certain way.

Stage 6 – Young Adulthood: Intimacy vs. Isolation

Between the ages of 18 and 40, people experience the conflict of intimacy and isolation. If you experience fulfilling relationships during this stage, you will reach intimacy. On the other hand, without meaningful relations, you will fall into isolation instead.

During this stage, young adults seek intimacy so intently that they dwell in unhealthy relationships. They tend to get married because of an urge to share their lives with someone else and experience commitment. Those who don’t get married often explore various relationships, looking for the one that suits them best.

Stage 7 – Middle Adulthood: Generativity vs. Stagnation and Self-Absorption

People between the ages of 40 and 65 experience the struggle between generativity and stagnation or self-absorption. Generativity means they feel a sense of duty to pass on their wisdom to later generations. They do this through parenting and mentoring other people.

The goal during middle adulthood is to be fully independent and established. People of this age group are urged to contribute to society and do meaningful things.

If the person is unhappy with their life, they will likely experience stagnation and self-absorption. They become frustrated and restless and isolate themselves without trying to make a meaningful contribution to society. The person may also feel things will only worsen as they age.

Stage 8 – Late Adulthood: Ego Integrity vs. Despair

In late adulthood, which is over 65 years old, people begin battling ego integrity and despair. During this mature stage, those with a sense of pride for what they accomplished in life will show their wisdom and gracefully accept aging. The ego integrity wins for this type of people, whereas others fall into despair.

If someone feels that they didn’t achieve enough or they have regrets, they will experience despair. They might feel like their life was unproductive, and they will feel a sense of loss.

As the individual reflects on their life, they will recognize meaningful experiences or moments of regret. Their time tends to move slower when they reach late adulthood, too.

The Opposition: Criticism of the Eight Stages of Life Theory

Although Erikson’s theory on the stages of life is popular and highly recognized, there is some criticism surrounding it. Some psychologists believe that Erikson focused too heavily on development during childhood and not enough during adulthood. Since an individual’s personality can change as an adult, it is sometimes thought that he should have elaborated in that area.

Another part of Erikson’s theory that is often criticized is his stress on male personality development. Most of his teachings focused on males as the subject, and he didn’t do much on females. In modern times, this lack of information regarding females has caused problems with using his study.

Other criticism shows that some people believe his theory was based on speculation. They think that Erikson didn’t obtain accurate data because he formulated his findings on available case studies. While the case studies he used were relevant to the topic, he didn’t do new research to back up his ideas.

One last bit of criticism about the stages of life theory is that it can’t apply to everyone. Some psychologists believe that it is too restricting for all people because everyone is different. It seems that this theory puts everyone into restricted categories without room for unique personalities.

stages of lifeFinal Thoughts on Erik Erikson’s Theory on the Eight Stages of Life

Erik Erikson’s theory for the eight stages of life offers a logical perspective on human development. It helps understand the conflicts people face at every stage of their life. Plus, it addresses how those conflicts can affect them later in life.

Understanding the stages of life can help you overcome areas you might have missed before. It is never too late to go back and work on a skill set you skipped over. By bettering yourself with the information found here, you will be well on your way to a fulfilling life.

While there are other theories out there, the stages of life philosophy offer helpful insight into the minds of age groups. Each stage is essential to living the best life possible, so try not to miss out on any of it. Go back and overcome anything you missed before, and it will help you move forward in life.

Esper the Borzoi Dog Is a Star on Instagram (You’ll See Why!)

Jacob Chattman is the owner of two Russian wolfhounds, also known as Borzoi dogs. Their names are Esper and Ora, and they’re jokingly called “magic spinning Russian noodle horses” on Instagram. The funny nickname comes from their love of spinning around in circles and their horselike features, like the long nose.

“Esper is my best friend. We do everything together. She likes to come on runs and hikes, and she sleeps in my bed,” Jacob says. “In 2015, I adopted Esper and her brother Vladimir. When we first met Esper, she was not in the best condition. She actually only had a little area to exercise when she was a young puppy. We had been looking for adoptions for years ‘cause I always wanted to rescue and adopt dogs, and the opportunity just fell in our laps.”

While he and his wife Christina were on vacation, they got a call about two Borzois available for adoption in New Mexico. They ended up driving 16 hours from Arizona to New Mexico to get them both. They’ve been on a fantastic journey with the beautiful dogs so far. However, Jacob is no stranger to the Borzoi breed.

“My parents have had Borzois since the 1970s, so I’ve grown up with nine different Borzois, and now the two of my own. I couldn’t understate the amount of positivity that comes from having a dog. There’s something to be said about the unconditional love that comes from having a dog that you just don’t understand until you own one,” he says.

“You’re having a bad day; your dog’s never really having a bad day; they’ll cheer you up. I’ve been making videos with Esper pretty much since I got her. This is back on Vine, and Esper got famous because we made “The little Russian lady” video, and we just continue doing content together. It’s something we love to do.”

The Borzoi dogs love the online attention but have a wonderful life behind the scenes, too.

borzoi

In January 2020, the family grew with the addition of another Borzoi named Ora. She’s a bit rowdier than Esper and loves to “jump and eat everything in sight,” according to their website. Ora also seems to enjoy being behind the camera, and she and her sister make tons of videos together.

They also get to explore tons of national parks and forests with their amazing humans. They’ve been to the Grand Canyon, the Petrified Forest, and all over Arizona pretty much. Not only do Jacob and Christina love having new experiences, but they also love taking their dogs along for the ride.

“You know, it gets me out of the house, too. It gets me traveling. It gets me having new experiences, it’s good for all of us. I think the best memory I have is the first day we had Esper and the first time we took her outside, and she started spinning. I have never been more terrified and excited and curious, I mean, we didn’t know what was happening, and we were so worried,” Jacob says.

She looked like a tornado, and both Jacob and his wife Christina thought, “What is wrong with my dog?!” That’s just another quirky part of Esper’s personality, but they wouldn’t have her any other way. They accept all of her spinning Russian noodle horse self.

 

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Despite their fun, active lifestyle, raising dogs requires a lot of patience and hard work.

Jacob gives the following advice for anyone looking to adopt a pet:

“If you’re going to start with a puppy, just expect it to be difficult, especially the first few months of having a puppy. It’s crazy, but think of it as an investment as your putting this effort, then you’ll get it back. When you train your dog well, they will give you all of that back tenfold because of the experiences you’re gonna have with your pup.

“Now, when you adopt a dog, there are quirks and stuff that come with adopting a dog because they’re older, and they’re more set in their ways. We got Esper when she was luckily fairly young; she was eight months, but where she came from, she had never seen cars, bicycles, skateboards, stairs. There are all of these things we had to prepare her for and get her used to,” he says.

“So, it’s going into it with an open heart and open mind, and trust it that over time, your dog will overcome their fears as long as you’re with them. It’s been a life-changing thing for me, and I would absolutely, absolutely do it 1,000 times, a million times.”

A few interesting facts about the Borzoi dog from the AKC:

  • They’re considered a giant breed, with adult males standing 28-32 inches high at the top of the shoulder. They weigh anywhere from 75-105 pounds.
  • The Borzoi dog is a hound group member and uses its eyes to find and chase prey. They have a 270-degree field of sight with eyes placed on the front of their head.
  • They were initially bred to hunt wild game like wolves, foxes, and hares. That explains their large yet agile body type, as they relied on their speed to catch prey. Indeed, the name Borzoi comes from the Russian word for “swift.”
  • Borzois make lovely family pets, as they’re gentle, sweet, and affectionate dogs.
  • They’re around the 90th most popular dog in the US, making them a pretty rare breed.

 

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A post shared by Esper & Ora (@esperborzoi)

Final thoughts on Esper the Borzoi dog and her sister Ora

Esper and Ora enjoy a happy, active lifestyle with their parents Jacob and Christina. They love spreading positivity and humor into people’s lives on their social media accounts. One of Esper’s videos went viral, titled “The little Russian lady.” We have to say. She pulled it off perfectly!

If you’re considering getting a Borzoi, make sure you have plenty of room since they are giant dogs! They will need lots of exercise and space to roam around. Overall, they’re just happy-go-lucky dogs with a lot of love to give.

Have you ever seen a Borzoi dog in person? Let us know in the comments!

Earth’s Energy Imbalance Has Doubled, According to Science

A joint NASA and NOAA study found that Earth’s energy imbalance approximately doubled between 2005 and 2019. This term refers to the difference between the Sun’s radiative energy the atmosphere absorbs and how much Earth emits to space. When the Earth gains energy (the current scenario), a positive energy imbalance occurs, and the planet heats up. Essentially, this means that Earth traps twice as much heat today compared with 2005.

Scientists fear that the energy imbalance only provides further evidence of rapidly accelerating climate change. The study was published June 15 in Geophysical Research Letters.

Scientists at NASA and NOAA compared two different data sets taken between 2005 and 2019:

  1. The atmosphere: NASA’s Clouds and the Earth’s Radiant Energy System (CERES) satellites measure how much energy enters and leaves Earth.
  2. The oceans: A global network of ocean floats, called Argo, measures the rate at which the world’s oceans are heating up. Around 90% of extra energy from an energy imbalance ends up in the oceans. So, the overall trends of heating in the atmosphere should correlate with changes in ocean temperatures.

“The two very independent ways of looking at changes in Earth’s energy imbalance are in really, really good agreement, and they’re both showing this very large trend, which gives us a lot of confidence that what we’re seeing is a real phenomenon and not just an instrumental artifact, ” said Norman Loeb, lead author for the study and principal investigator for CERES at NASA’s Langley Research Center in Hampton, Virginia. “The trends we found were quite alarming in a sense.”

What’s causing the Earth’s energy imbalance?

pop meme The scientists discovered a few critical reasons for the rapid warming trend on the planet.

  • Increases in emissions of greenhouse gases, such as carbon dioxide and methane, from human activity. Otherwise known as anthropogenic forcing, this causes a chain reaction of events. First, the excess heat generated by burning fossil fuels gets trapped in the atmosphere. As the radiation builds, more significant amounts of snow and ice melt. Then, the increased water vapor and cloud change further amplify warming.

All of these factors contribute to the planet’s energy imbalance. However, the investigators wanted to narrow down the primary reasons for the warming trend even further.

What the researchers observed:

To do this, they used a method that analyzed the following:

  • changes in clouds
  • water vapor
  • combined contributions from trace gases and the output of light from the Sun
  • amount of light reflected by the Earth (surface albedo)
  • atmospheric particles called aerosols
  • changes in surface and atmospheric temperature distributions

The study found that excess greenhouse gases have partially caused the energy imbalance to double, as researchers suspected. They also found that atmospheric water vapor increases have trapped more outgoing longwave radiation. Finally, a decrease in clouds and sea ice has caused the Earth to absorb more heat from the sun. These factors are mainly driving the energy imbalance. However, there’s one more component likely contributing to a warming Earth.

  • A flip of the Pacific Decadal Oscillation (PDO) from a cool phase to a warm phase. This likely contributed significantly to the rapid intensification of the energy imbalance. The PDO is a long-term, fluctuating pattern of ocean-atmosphere climate variability in the eastern Pacific. The massive water area goes through cool and warm phases every 20-30 years. This cycle can cause significant impacts on the Earth’s weather and climate. In 2014, the PDO shifted to a warm phase, which continued until 2020. It caused a considerable decrease in cloud coverage over the ocean, leading to greater absorption of solar radiation.

“It’s likely a mix of anthropogenic forcing and internal variability,” said Loeb. “And over this period, they’re both causing warming, which leads to a fairly large change in Earth’s energy imbalance. The magnitude of the increase is unprecedented.”

The good news: the Earth’s energy isn’t off by much, and it may stabilize in the future

According to an article by Scientific American, scientists say there’s a relatively small energy difference. In fact, there’s only a 0.3% difference between radiation going in and out of the planet’s atmosphere. However, that’s enough to throw the planet’s climate and weather out of whack. Over the last 150 years, the Earth’s global average temperatures have increased by almost 2 degrees Fahrenheit.

While these are grim findings indeed, Loeb added that the study captures a relatively short period. There’s no way to accurately predict what the climate will look like in the future or if the energy imbalance will persist. However, the study proves that trapped heat in the Earth’s atmosphere is causing significant instability. Unless the Earth starts cooling down somehow, we can expect further climate volatility in the future.

“The lengthening and highly complementary records from Argo and CERES have allowed us both to pin down Earth’s energy imbalance with increasing accuracy, and to study its variations and trends with increasing insight, as time goes on,” said Gregory Johnson, a co-author on the study and physical oceanographer at the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration’s Pacific Marine Environmental Laboratory in Seattle, Washington. “Observing the magnitude and variations of this energy imbalance are vital to understanding Earth’s changing climate.

Loeb says that they will use this data to confirm their climate prediction models if the energy imbalance continues.

energy imbalanceFinal thoughts: Earth’s energy imbalance doubled between 2005 and 2019

Scientists from NASA and NOAA have found evidence that confirms our planet is going through a warming cycle. In fact, there’s twice the amount of heat on Earth now compared with 2005. Several factors have contributed to this: greenhouse gases, rapidly melting snow and ice, and decreased cloud cover.

Also, a pattern of ocean-atmosphere climate variability, the Pacific Decadal Oscillation, is in a warm phase. Scientists say this likely significantly affected the energy imbalance recorded over several decades. If the climate becomes further destabilized, we will likely see even worse effects in the future. The team will continue running climate models and analyzing data to better understand what we can expect.

A Self-Assured Person Does These 13 Things Without Realizing It

How would you describe someone who has confidence? Are they self-assured, or do they know and feel when they’re their best?

Every person is different. So having assurance and confidence in yourself means something different to each person.

For instance, you may wake up in the morning and love what you see looking back at yourself in the mirror. However, another person doesn’t even consider that as confidence. They would see someone who goes to work, does a good job, and lives to face another day as assurance.

The good news is that there is no right or wrong way to show assurance. Yet, there are ways that you can increase your self-confidence and learn from those who have this natural gift.

Thirteen Things the Self-Assured Person Does

Maybe you’re a self-assured person, or perhaps you’re working on becoming more convinced. However, here are some habits that the assured person does without even realizing.

1. They Won’t Stay in Abusive or Unhealthy Relationships

self-assuredThe self-confident person won’t find themselves in an abusive relationship or won’t stay there long. They know they can take care of themselves, so they don’t depend on anyone. Did you know that many people stay in an abusive or unsatisfying relationship because they fear they won’t be able to make it financially?

While that’s a lackluster reason to stay with someone, it was pretty commonplace in times past. However, in today’s society, both men and women bring home a paycheck, so the reason to stay with someone based on money matters has declined.

Consequently, the person who is assured and confident in themselves knows that they will make it come what may. So, they will not subject themselves or their children to a harmful situation in fear they will struggle. This person loves themselves enough to leave.

2. They’re Goal Oriented

It’s essential to have goals and to work towards accomplishing them. Goals can be described as short and long term, but both types are essential. While most people see these challenges as hard work, the self-assured person looks at them with both excitement and optimism.

3. They’re Not Afraid to Be Assertive

The ability to stand up for yourself is a skill that everyone should cultivate. However, someone who is confident knows their value. They can be pretty assertive if the situation warrants.

With each use of their assertive nature, they gain a bit more confidence in their abilities. For instance, assume your job requires that everyone put in a mandatory ten hours of overtime this week. Knowing that you have children and responsibilities outside of your job, you are assured enough to voice opposition.

While others are afraid to speak up because they fear losing their job, you don’t care. You know that you’re a vital part of the job market and your skills are highly desired. So, in return, the boss listens to your reasons and understands that it’s an unfair call to make overtime mandatory.

It’s also common to see the confident person as a leader, as they have the drive and skillset that makes people listen and follow their lead.

4. They Live Life Without Regrets

Part of developing a good sense of yourself is learning to make those tough decisions. You use rationale to make your choices and trust that you will make the right call. For instance, if you go shopping and want to buy a pair of leggings as they’re super stylish, your rational side tells you that you will look better in jeans.

When you get to the office, you might see others wearing oh-so-comfortable leggings and become jealous. However, those who have confidence in their decisions remind themselves of the exact reason why they didn’t buy that pair of pants. They live life without regrets because they make wise and informed choices.

5. They Embrace Learning New Things

Learning new skills is both fun and good for your brain. However, the assured person knows that they can also help to boost their confidence. Whether it’s taking on quilting, learning how to code computers, or grasping karate, assurance comes with each new mastered task.

While most people think of the fun aspects of these hobbies, someone with confidence gives it their all. These individuals know that one day they might be able to use these skills to impress a boss or to get a leg up in the job market.

6. They Embrace Constructive Criticism

Getting negative feedback can be very crushing to some folks. However, when you’re self-assured, you know that there are bits of truth in these statements that can be helpful. According to Indeed, one of the authorities in the job market, there will be both positive and negative aspects of criticism.

The assured person stops their initial reaction and takes time to digest the statement. They weed through the harmful stuff to take the parts that they can work on. They are strong enough to admit they need to improve and determined sufficient to make such improvements.

gaslighting phrases

7. They Value the Thoughts and Opinions of Others

It’s often thought that the confident person will be dominating, and this includes conversations. However, these folks know how to listen quite well. They know that other opinions are valuable.

They will listen closely because they are ever eager to learn new things. You can discover a lot by listening to others and hearing their thoughts and opinions too.

8. They Share Successes Without Bragging

There’s a big difference between someone who brags a lot and someone who lets you know their skill set. For instance, Thomas and Keith work in the same office. Both are well versed in computer programming.

Consequently, when there’s an issue, people prefer to call Keith over Thomas. The reason is that Keith gets the job done and showcases his skills without bragging. Coworkers know how skillful he is as he often shows them tips and tricks to make their life easier.

Thomas, on the other hand, constantly brags about his education. He often acts like everyone else is beneath him. He is unrelatable, and people feel odd around him. The confident person shares their knowledge with others to enhance their lives, and they don’t need to brag.

9. They Know Kindness Increases Their Inner Strength

People often think that self-assured folks are arrogant and self-absorbed. However, nothing could be further from the truth. They know that kindness does wonders for their inner strength, and it makes them better people.

These folks often go out of their way to be kind to others, and they’re confident enough in their abilities to help others when they’re down.

10. They Keep Their Purpose in Mind

Everyone has a purpose and a destiny here on earth. While some folks get easily sidetracked by the little things, the self-assured keep their purpose in mind. Jack Hawley wrote a powerful book entitled Reawakening the Spirit in Work.

In his writings, he states that your purpose is a place where your talent and values live. While they’re there all the time, they need you to arrive. Many people spend so much time living in a basement apartment that they never consider there’s a vacant upstairs penthouse that’s calling their name.

Thankfully, the purpose-filled person knows that there’s more out there for them, and they won’t settle for mediocrity.

11. They Trust They Will Say and Do the Right Things

Did you know that your mind wanders naturally? It’s been said that you’re only aware of what’s going on about 50 percent of the time. It’s hard to pay attention to everything that’s going on around you, but those who have confidence in themselves know that even when their mind is daydreaming, they will say and do the right things.

12. They Uplift People and Never Gossip

The confident person has little time for idle chatter, so you won’t likely see them engaging in gossip. They would instead focus on their aspirations, dreams, and goals for the future. They tend to be more positive than negative, so they try to avoid negative things like gossiping.

13. They Ask for Help

While this person is assured of their abilities, they’re also sure when they’ve taken on too much. They know that it’s impossible to do everything by themselves, so they have no qualms about asking for help when needed. Unlike many others, they don’t see needing help as a threat to their status or position.

pop memeFinal Thoughts on The Self-Assured Person

Do you feel that you’re confident, or is this an area you need to work on? Becoming self-assured is born into some folks, but others must work extremely hard to achieve this status. However, by incorporating a few things from this list into your life, you will soon find that it’s much easier for you to gain confidence and live a better purpose-driven life.

10 Ways an Honest Man Handles His Relationships Differently

You can recognize an honest man by the way he handles his relationships. When someone values honesty, they do things differently than others.

Honesty is important to him, and it shows in his relationships.

He won’t tell lies to hide things from his partner, and he expects the same treatment in return. Since he is so honest, he will look for someone that holds that same quality. This makes healthy communication possible in his relationships, and it is where he will shine the most.

An honest man knows that he must earn trust, and he speaks openly with his partner. He won’t deceive or betray those he is closest to, and his desire to tell the truth never wavers. While many men might claim to be this way, sincere men are rarer than that.

Ten Ways an Honest Man Handles His Relationships Differently

Since honest men handle their relationships differently, it is easy to spot the signs. They do things in ways that no one else does. Once you know the differences, you will begin to notice these characteristics about them.

honest man1. His Partner Always Knows How Much He Cares for Them

An honest man will not let those he cares for doubt his feelings for them. He is affectionate and makes his partner feel wanted and appreciated. His words and actions will match up, further confirming his true feelings.

When a man is honest, he won’t have a problem showing and communicating his affection. His partner will never have to wonder how he feels in the relationship.

This type of man will also show his appreciation to show his partner that he cares. He notices the things his partner does, no matter how little it is. Not only does he notice, but he expresses his appreciation sincerely.

2. He Works to Establish Trust in the Relationship

Trust must be earned, and honest men know that they need to prove their trustworthiness and commitment. They know that trust brings confidence and comfort to the relationship, and they want to achieve that.

Honest men also know that their partner can’t trust them without establishing that stage of the relationship first. Trust isn’t something that can just be handed over by choice. He will work to earn it, and then he will maintain that trust throughout the relationship.

Not only does he work to gain his partner’s trust, but he also works to trust his partner. He doesn’t accuse them without reason, and he takes his partner for their word.

Plus, he won’t believe things people say about his partner unless there is proof of wrongdoing. He can confidently do this because he has worked on trusting them and knows them at that level better than others.

3. He is Always Improving

An honest man always works on bettering himself. He likes to learn new things, develop new skills, and continually self-improve. Because of this, he is likely intellectual and keeps his partner’s attention.

He doesn’t do this for his partner, though, because he will do it even if he isn’t in a relationship. Continually improving himself is essential to his well-being, and he needs to feel like he is always getting better.

4. He Opens Up Emotionally

While some people struggle to express themselves emotionally, an honest person won’t have that problem. When a man is like this, he will talk about his feelings, fears, and desires. He doesn’t hide how he feels, making it easier to work through problems in his relationships.

Rather than allow problems to create tension and frustration, he speaks his mind. He won’t let things fester as his relationship crumbles. Plus, he is straightforward and doesn’t make his partner guess what he is feeling or hinting at.

He lets his partner into his mind completely and opens up to them. Even when it is hard, he understands that a healthy relationship requires this level of connection.

5. He Makes Others Feel Comfortable Being Honest with Him

An honest person will make others feel like they can be open and honest without judgment in their relationships. He encourages people to be honest and share their feelings because he wants to work on things. His partner won’t have to be afraid of him overeating or lashing out when they speak up.

He understands that no two people share the same views and beliefs, and he is okay with that. His understanding of this is what brings comfort to his relationships because people can be themselves around him.

who you are becoming6. He is a Source of Safety

If he is honest, he makes those around him feel safe. His partner might not need protection, but he is ready to be their safe space anyway. He won’t ever be the one causing his partner pain, either, so the person in his life won’t ever have to feel unsafe.

His partner knows they can come to him for anything at any time, and he will be ready to help them. He will offer support, speak on their behalf, and stand in the way of any potential harm.

When his partner is afraid of something, he will be their comfort along the way. If he can, he will take care of the problem his partner is scared of so that they can feel safer. When he knows his partner intimately, he can often take care of these issues without his partner having to ask.

7. He Takes Responsibility and Doesn’t Shift Blame

In his relationships, an honest man takes responsibility for what he does and the decisions he makes. He doesn’t shift the blame to other people or situations. When he makes a mistake, he admits it, apologizes, makes it right, and uses it as a learning opportunity.

He isn’t uncomfortable saying that he is sorry, and he knows that it doesn’t diminish his worth. Another reason he takes responsibility so easily is that it makes him feel more confident and courageous. Admitting his faults humbles him and helps him grow as a person.

8. He Pursues Passions That Don’t Involve His Partner

Although he loves spending time with his partner, he pursues other passions, too. He stays busy and doesn’t plan his life around the person he is in a relationship with. Not planning his life around his partner isn’t to say he doesn’t make time for them, but he also makes other plans that don’t involve them.

His relationships don’t define him, and he understands that everyone needs to be an individual. He is confident enough to pursue things he is passionate about even when he is in a relationship. Plus, he knows that his partner has things they want to do, too.

He encourages his partner to chase after their dreams and do things they are passionate about, as well. This understanding and encouragement allow both partners to grow as individuals while strengthening the bond in the relationship.

9. He is Helpful

When a man helps with responsibilities, errands, and other things, he might be an honest person. He knows that all of the work can’t fall to his partner, so he helps without being asked. His level of honesty doesn’t allow him to pretend that he doesn’t see the things that need doing.

Since he is happy to help out without being asked, his partner won’t have anxiety about needing or wanting help. They will know that he doesn’t mind helping out, and it gives them a sense of relief to have someone like this in their life.

10. He Has His Priorities Straight

An honest man never has to be told that he needs to adjust his priorities. He knows what he must do, and he can easily prioritize without being told. This type of man stays on the right path because he knows what is most important in life.

He has more than a few priorities, and he makes sure to take care of them all. Taking care of everything involves spending time with his family and friends, working toward self-improvement, and maintaining a healthy romantic relationship. There will be other things he prioritizes, and he won’t forget about them when he gets into a relationship.

honest manFinal Thoughts on Ways an Honest Man Handles His Relationships Differently

An honest man is rare, but he is out there. Knowing the ways that he handles his relationships can help with identifying honesty in the people around you. You can eliminate dishonest people quickly and easily and won’t be easily fooled.

An honest man will have his priorities straight, and he won’t make excuses for his shortcomings. As he works to strengthen his relationships through honesty, he will work on improving himself, too. His relationships don’t define him, so don’t mistake that quality for indifference.

Watch for people that tell the truth even when it isn’t beneficial to them. Those are the people that likely have these other qualities, too, as they aren’t afraid of honesty. Once you find an honest man, keep him around because they are hard to come by.

10 Secretive Behaviors That Cheaters Exhibit Without Realizing It

Cheaters have plenty of things in common, but the most familiar signs are the inclination to be unfaithful and overall secretive behavior. Do you have a partner that you doubt their fidelity?

What causes a person to cheat on someone they love, and how do they act after they’ve committed such a sin? Is it a selfish urge to act on and don’t think of the consequences, or does the person have dysfunctional mental issues lurking below the surface?

There has been much research done regarding cheaters, and most point to one standard set of characteristics. Serial cheaters are different than those non-philandering folks.

The good news is that once you understand and readily identify these qualities, you can protect yourself from getting hurt.

Do You Know How to Spot the Traits of Partner Who Might Cheat?

Here are some of the warning signs of a cheater.

  • Excessive flirting: Everyone loves to be a tease and be toyed with when they’re trying to get someone’s attention. However, this person flirts with people right while their wife or husband is sitting with them. They know no boundaries and have an overly flirtatious nature.
  • Insecurities: One of the reasons why people cheat is insecurities. It’s like this fling helps their ego and gives them a boost as they still feel desirable.
  • Thrill-seeking behaviors: According to the National Library of Medicine, some folks with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder often have trouble with impulse control issues. It’s derived from a frontal lobe dysfunction that occurs with this mental health problem, but other things can cause it too.
  • Immorality: Anyone who has had affairs in the past will likely repeat these behaviors. Once they have a taste or the thrill of cheating, it’s easy to do it time and again.
  • Reality distortions: Many people have a distorted view of themselves and the world around them. This can also be caused by mental health issues, such as narcissistic personality disorder. According to Neuro Tray, cognitive distortions are often the cause for many breaks from reality, though they’re not severe enough to affect going to work or other responsibilities.
  • Lack of respect: Some individuals have no respect for those they claim to love. These are often the folks who usually can’t keep a job because they have a challenging time with authority.
  • Narcissism: Did you know that most serial cheaters are often narcissistic? Part of having this mental health disorder is being greedy, selfish, and using people to benefit your needs. When a cheater feels a sense of entitlement, it can be part of their brain’s wiring that feeds their disorder.

secretiveTen Common Secretive Behaviors of The Cheater

Whether they’re about to be caught or they’ve already been figured out, there are some specific behaviors or actions they engage in.

This lifestyle is very secretive, and they want to do whatever possible to keep someone from finding out their sins. Here are the most common behaviors of a cheater.

1. Jealousy

Perhaps, jealousy is the most confusing of the behaviors that the cheater exhibits. It could be due to the cardinal rule that what goes around comes around. However, these people often become very jealous of their spouse, even stooping to the level of accusing them of cheating.

Their jealousy can consume them, especially if they’re afraid that you will leave them. Sure, they’re the ones that made a mistake, but they’re fearful of what you may do, and they don’t want to lose you.

2. Flirting

While it’s already been discussed that most cheaters are flirtatious, it’s worth mentioning again. Not all cheaters have this flirty edge, but most exhibit this behavior. It’s not that they want to hurt you, but it’s that they need validation to soothe their low self-esteem from the opposite sex.

3. Lie

One thing you can count on with a cheater is that you can’t count on them to be honest. They have a way of lying to those around them, and those lies often snowball into a big mess. If you stay with a cheater long after the event, you will often find that they lie about anything and everything.

You would think that they would be on their best behavior after committing such an act but remember that a leopard can’t change their spots.

4. Vendetta With the Opposite Sex

Many cheaters have secretive hurts from the opposite sex, so they have an “I’m going to get back at you” attitude. This is often true of those who have been abused. The selfish person will usually have deep wounds from their childhood, and if a mother hurt them, then they might take this vengeance out on women.

Another thing to consider is that people often accuse men of being serial cheaters, but women can be cheaters too. How many girls have you seen with “daddy issues” that turn to lascivious acts to ease those pains?

5. Mood Swings

When someone has a secret to hide, they’re often nervous. This anxiety can cause mood swings that make a living with them unbearable. So, if you find that you’re walking on eggshells around this person, then it could be because they have something to hide.

As they say, the truth will set you free, and once this person gets this massive secret off their chest, they will feel relief.

mood journal6. Buys You Guilt Gifts

Has your partner started buying gifts for no reason? If you’ve been together for ten years and they’ve never bought spontaneous gifts before, it’s a cause for concern. Their guilt may be eating them alive inside, and the only way they can soothe this guilt is to buy gifts to ease their conscience.

7. Too Much or Too Little Interest in Romance

One way that many people can tell something is wrong in their relationship is that things are disrupted in the bedroom. If a person gets plenty of intimacy somewhere else, they don’t need their desires taken care of at home.

However, they may be fearful of losing you, so much so that they can be a little overzealous at times too. Therefore, anything out of the ordinary in your romantic life is a cause for concern.

8. Becomes Obsessed with Grooming

When someone has a new fling, they often want to groom themselves to look good. So, a big red flag to spot the secretive life is to see their grooming habits. Do they suddenly get a new wardrobe, hairstyle and act younger than they usually do?

They may be having a mid-life crisis, or they have a big secret to hide. The grooming maybe for their new fling.

9. Gaslighting

Gaslighting is an age-old problem with a new reality. When someone tries to make you doubt your sanity or makes you believe that your speculations are insane, it’s called gaslighting. The standard trick of the selfish person is to turn things around so that you doubt yourself.

Sure, they may be guilty, but they want to turn things around so that you feel bad, and they’re off the hook. Therefore, they will twist things, lie, and do whatever they can to cover their secret. You must be one step ahead of this conniving person, as they will stop at nothing to keep their affair hidden.

10. Spends Extra Money or Has Money Issues

Money issues are a hallmark of a cheater. They may become secretive about their spending, or there is money missing you can’t account for. They may get a checking account separate from yours or even suggest keeping finances separate.

There are lots of expenses involved with affairs. Often, they will need to pay for hotels, flowers and gifts, new clothes, and other things to keep up with this game. The money must come from somewhere, and if you often had your hand in the bank accounts, then it’s not so easy to hide.

secretiveFinal Thoughts on The Secretive Nature of Cheaters

A study found that 55 percent of men admit to cheating on their partner, and 50 percent of women. Those numbers are staggering, and it means that you must be on your toes when it comes to abnormal behaviors from your partner.

Sadly, you may be a cheater or be cheated on at least once in your life. These actions make you develop a secretive nature as you fear getting caught. Many cheaters don’t want to leave their spouse or long-term relationship, but they want the thrill of the fling.

Sadly, some people feel that once you cheat, then the relationship is through. These folks want to stroke those feel-good chemicals in the brain, and once they get their thrill, they will return to the comforts of home. Unfortunately, dealing with a cheater is never easy, even if you decide to stay and work things out.

Once you find out for sure they have been unfaithful, you both have a lot of work to heal the relationship or move on apart. However, their secretive lifestyle is a dead giveaway that something is not right with them. It might take a little detective work to figure things out, but you can solve the case.

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