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15 Undeniable Signs of Falling in Love

April 5, 2022 by Chris Butler

Although everyone has a slightly different way to describe falling in love, it generally means having romantic feelings toward someone along with a powerful attraction to them. Falling in love has inspired songs, poems, and books. Countless romantic movies and television shows have characters who initially dislike one another but suddenly fall in love. These shows are usually predictable and filled with over-the-top romance. It seems like we love falling in love.

15 Tell-tale Signs of Falling in Love

So, how do you know you’re falling in love? What are the signs of falling in love?

1 – Time flies when you’re falling in love together

When you’re falling in love, you’ll feel like time flies when you’re together and drags when you’re apart. You enjoy dating this person and wish you could never be apart from one another. Some say that falling in love makes you lose your sense of reality. It gets distorted so that you lose track of time.

2 – They are perfect in your eyes

Love is blind, wrote Shakespeare in his well-known play, The Merchant in Venice. This is probably the best way to describe how you feel about your sweetheart. You’re blind to their flaws and poor habits. They can have the quirkiest behaviors, but they are perfection personified in your eyes. If someone points out their flaws, you’ll be quick to defend them. When you’re in love with someone, you only see the good.

3 – You think about them all the time

One undeniable sign of falling in love is being distracted because you can’t stop thinking about them all the time. It isn’t easy to concentrate at work or in class because you’re constantly thinking about your special someone. You replay every word they said to you, every moment of eye contact from the last time you were together. You rehearse what you want to tell them when you meet again. It’s time-consuming and emotionally exhausting because falling in love is a full-time job.

4 – You want to learn everything about them

One undeniable sign of falling in love is that you’ll want to learn everything you can about your love interest. You’ll be curious about what they like to eat, where they like to shop, their favorite movies or books, and even their coffee order will be significant to you. Nothing is too trivial. You’ll feel enamored by every detail they share about themselves.

5 – Your entire life feels wonderful

Falling in love has a powerful effect on how you view your entire life. Everything feels wonderful. If your car breaks down and your dog vomits on your carpet, you’ll laugh in anticipation of telling your lover about your hilarious day. Scientists suggest that falling in love releases extra dopamine into some regions of your brain. These chemicals cause you to feel happier about your life. Even the anticipation of being with your sweetie boosts your dopamine levels, making you feel excited about seeing them.

6 – You feel extremely affectionate

Of course, when you’re in love, you’ll feel highly affectionate towards the other person. Holding hands, cuddling, and leaning on each other comes naturally. Even if you aren’t a loving person, you suddenly become affectionate. Undoubtedly, it’s because some of the dopamine stimulates your brain to make you feel happy. No matter, because affection strengthens your bond while you’re dating. It builds your romance and makes you want to spend more time together.

7 – You want to be with them all the time

Another sign you’re falling in love is that you want to be together all the time. Even if you don’t enjoy dancing, you’ll go dancing if your sweetheart wants to. You’ll suddenly enjoy hobbies and activities you never had before because you get to be with them. You’ll rearrange your schedule and give up your interests, all to spend extra time with your sweetie. Your friends will scratch their heads when they see you taking painting classes, but you won’t care because you’re undeniably falling in love.

8 – You lose your appetite if falling in love

One of the signs of falling in love for many people is the loss of appetite. You can’t think about eating when you’re so busy thinking about what your sweetie is doing at the moment. Romantic love, according to science, changes a person’s behavior because of the release of hormones. Some of these hormones suppress your appetite and cause insomnia.

9 – You dream about your future together

Being in love makes your future feel bright. You may daydream about what life will be like together with your sweetie, plan your wedding, and imagine how many kids you’ll have. If you’re not careful, you’ll end up way down the road before you know it. Of course, it’s essential to let your sweetie know what you’re dreaming about, so they can get on the same page.

10 – You want to meet their family and friends

When you’re in love, you love everything about the other person. You want to meet their family and friends. You will love meeting them and love hearing stories about your sweetie growing up. Every little detail will delight you and make you love them more. You’ll attempt to make a good impression on their family and friends so they like you and will support your relationship.

11 – You call them first thing when you have news

Your sweetheart becomes your confidant and best friend. They are the ones you call whenever you have news, whether it’s good or bad. You feel talking to them calms you down and helps you decide. If you are upset, you’ll know they will be there for you as you walk through the difficulty.

12 – You feel safe when you are falling in love

An undeniable sign of falling in love is feeling safe with your lover. You know they have your best interest in mind. You’ll look to them for help and encouragement. They are the person you feel safe telling everything without fear of being judged. When you’re in love, you’ll share deep secrets and feelings you may not have told others. Of course, this is risky, especially if the relationship doesn’t work out.

13 – You want to protect them

When you fall in love, you feel protective of your love interest. If they’re having a hard time, you’ll be the first one to encourage and help them. If people make derogatory remarks about your sweetie, you’ll adamantly defend them and probably refuse to be friends with the person who made the comments. You’ll protect their privacy. You won’t tell your friends things they’ve shared in secret with you.

14 – Emotional ups and downs

Being in love is tumultuous. You’ll feel emotional. Things that never bothered you before will suddenly hit you hard. Love songs will make you feel romantic. Falling in love makes you bounce between excitement about the relationship to fear it will end. According to researchers, falling in love is addicting because of the release of brain chemicals. That’s why if you experience a breakup, you feel it emotionally and physically.

15 – You might feel a bit of stress when falling in love

Even though you feel happy when you’re with your significant other, falling in love is stressful. Your body releases high amounts of cortisol, a stress hormone, which makes you jittery, nervous, and sometimes anxious. Of course, this isn’t sustainable or healthy for your body. Over time, as your relationship progresses, you’ll calm down and feel more relaxed.

Final Thoughts on the First Signs of Falling in Love

Signs of falling in love are well known. Romantic movies, songs, and poems describe this experience. When you’re in love, you’ll feel many emotions, some good and some bad. You’ll be protective of your sweetie, want to be with them all the time, and enjoy meeting their family and friends. Strangely, falling in love makes you more stressed, but exhilarated. If you’re in an over-the-top romance, check out these signs of falling in love to see if you fit the mold.

10 Things Casual Relationships Teach You About Love

April 5, 2022 by Deborah Tayloe

Folks often fantasize about summer love, casual relationships, or a fling. While they seem to catch you off guard, sweep you up in an emotional storm, and feel so good, they also can teach you a great deal about the difference between these affairs and true love.

A fling is usually not meant to be something that lasts forever, and both parties know this from the start. For instance, you meet someone while vacationing at the beach and have an instant physical connection. Neither one of you are willing to give up your respected lives in other parts of the country, but for a brief moment in time, you have an exciting time together.

You’ve probably heard the old saying that there’s the kind of girl you have fun with and the kind of girl you marry. The relationships that these two different people provide are based on circumstances and personalities. Some people are only meant for dating and one-night stands, while others want something more permanent.

Male or female doesn’t matter, as you can learn many things from the brief, casual relationships in your life that come and go so quickly.

Ten Things You Learn About Love From Casual Relationships

Regardless of the duration, every relationship you have is there to teach you a lesson. Some will make you a better person, while others will leave you bitter and hurt. Here are some things that dating and those casual flings will teach you about finding true love.

1. Flings and Love are Based on Different Emotions

A casual situation is usually based on lust rather than love. When love comes into the picture, the emotions are all different. Many people can have one-night stands and no attachments whatsoever, but when love is involved, it hurts when it ends.

Both men and women can have these casual affairs without giving them a second thought. Some will fall in love and be caught off guard as they become wrapped up in emotions. However, most people have a mindset in advance that dictates that they have no intentions of a long-term situation with this person.

2. Emotional Despair May Be Involved

Cosmopolitan Magazine referenced an interesting study regarding the kind of people that engage in flings. Remember that there’s the kind of person you date and the one you marry. This study shows that a person who regularly participates in casual relationships is often highly anxious or depressed.

The study specified that these casual relationships are with people you’ve known for less than one week. Additionally, those more likely to engage in self-harming behavior are eager to jump into situations with such short durations. However, when you’re in love, it’s very different.

True love doesn’t require you to fix anything wrong with yourself or boost your ego to feel better. It’s an emotion that comes from genuinely caring for someone. Most people who engage in these sporadic flings do it for self-gratification and not to look out for the other person. This is why some people should remain single.

3. Narcissists Tend to Like Casual Relationships

You don’t want to date a selfish person, as they can be pretty toxic. However, these folks are more likely to engage in a spur-of-the-moment romance. They know that they can’t do anything for the long haul, and once people see their true colors, all bets are off.

They find gratification in these brief physical encounters as it helps to care for their needs with no commitments. Self-confident and socially assertive narcissists find engaging in these brief encounters easier. However, when you’re in love, you want to slow things down and savor every moment you spend together.

4. Casual Relationships Boost Self-Confidence for Some People

Love connections often start with friendships and grow into something more significant. However, casual relationships tend to be a bit more liberating. Some people don’t want to commit to anyone, so this arrangement works well for them. People feel free to push the boundaries and do things they usually wouldn’t do when they care about someone so deeply.

It’s not unusual for people to try new exciting or dangerous things when they’re with someone without strings attached. However, you’re often more cautious when you have a sense of emergent true love.

5. You Can Back Out of Casual Relationships With Relative Ease

Since no solid ties or friendships are involved, it’s okay if you back out. You make the call if you don’t want to be with this person tonight. Though it’s rude, it doesn’t matter if you catfish them, either.

The ability to change your mind at the last minute adds an element of freedom to a fling. However, when there’s love involved, you can’t back out and go the other way without someone getting hurt.

6. Summers and Heat Makes You Do Crazy Things

Love is more thought out and typically doesn’t happen in the blink of an eye. However, some people do believe in love at first sight. However, many flings happen during the summer, when people are basking in the golden rays and feeling that surge of vitamin D and being outside.

The love of summer and warm weather begins for most school-age people. You look forward and long for that break when you don’t have any responsibilities and can play and have fun. Even as adults, you carry some of that fondness for this season because of your childhood.

This is the same reason why so many adults get just as excited for snow days as they do for spring break. You feel freer to take risks and do things during the summer as you know reality will hit you hard, and you must return to a regular schedule. Unlike the summer weather, Love doesn’t have a definitive starting and endpoint.

7. Sometimes it’s Better When Things Don’t Last

You will learn through self-growth and reflection that sometimes it’s better if these casual relationships don’t last. Every intimate act you engage in doesn’t have to be life-changing. Still, you will learn lessons and take things with you from this brief encounter.

Some casual flings last months or years, but others are one-time occurrences. Regardless of your situation, you will remember it and learn something, even if it’s small. The divorce courts are full of couples who tried to make it work but didn’t, so sometimes it’s better if things don’t last.

8. You Can Blame Your DNA For the Casual Hook Up

It’s ironic, but some people are more inclined to have a one-night stand than others. If you frequent these casual associations, you might have this DNA variant. According to research conducted by Los Angeles Times, some folks tend to be more eager to engage in these quick and uncommitted relationships than others, and genetics are to blame.

9. Those with a High Libido Tend to Like Casual Relationships

Some people will never be faithful to anyone, as it’s not in their personality. Therefore, so many people have affairs and end up in divorce court. Some folks just aren’t cut out for marriage.

Those with these casual flings tend to have a higher libido, which usually gets them in trouble. It’s better to stick to casual relationships when you have an issue like this, as typically, no one gets hurt emotionally in a fling.

10. You Can Better Control Casual Relationships

Love takes you as a hostage and makes you a whole different person. You experience feelings and sensations you never thought possible. However, you have more control when you’re involved in something casual.

You get to call the shots, ensure you don’t leave your comfort zone, and leave with no strings attached. The control element appeals to many, as they feel free to be more dangerous. However, love doesn’t allow such freedoms, and you can’t always control it.

Final Thoughts on Lessons Learned from Casual Relationships

Something causal does have the potential to blossom into something more significant. According to a study by Nautilus, 66 percent of men and 50 percent of women admit to having one of these quick relationships. However, they’re not always just one-night encounters. Around 28 percent of people with a casual fling fell in love afterward.

What seems to be a win-win experience for both parties can take a sudden turn, but this is not usually true. Sometimes, people are desperate and lonely, and need someone to connect with physically. However, love has some of these elements in the mix. But it’s about so much more than just intimacy.

True love proves much more profound, and it awakens the soul. It lights a fire in your heart and changes your entire life. This is an area where casual relationships could never compare. Part of love is self-growth and the desire to be better and build a life with someone who stole your heart. Having a one-night stand won’t do any of those things for you.

10 Steps to Emotional Recovery from Cheating

April 4, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

When you’re in a relationship, you hope for fidelity and loyalty. However, cheating happens more often than we’d like to admit, and it can take a toll on your mental wellbeing. Finding a way to emotional recovery is essential for moving forward and overcoming the heartache.

Experiencing infidelity in your relationship is one of the hardest things you’ll ever go through. You can overcome it, though, but the process won’t be easy. You must decide what step to take next, but you also must focus on emotional recovery.

Moving on is essential no matter what you decide to do next. You must let go of anger and embrace your situation as a new beginning. Moving on might not seem possible at first, but you can make it happen.

If your partner has been unfaithful, you must prioritize your physical and emotional wellbeing over anything else. Even if you only suspect something is up, start prioritizing yourself right away. When you put yourself first, you’ll start the path to emotional recovery from cheating.

Ten Steps to Emotional Recovery After Your Partner Cheats

Cheating can drastically alter your emotions, making it hard to get over the situation. The experience is shattering because you can’t undo it no matter how much you want it to be. Plus, the grieving process can be long and hard, especially if there are many good memories to look back on.

However, there are ways to make it easier to deal with and experience less pain. These steps can help you with emotional recovery from cheating, helping you move on and let go.

1. Rediscover Who You Are

Being cheated on can diminish your self-esteem, so take the time to rediscover who you are. Explore hobbies and interests you didn’t take the time for during your relationship. Focus on things that make you feel confident and sure of yourself, as it’ll help you rediscover yourself sooner.

Consider the things in your life that make you feel the most like yourself. It might be cooking, spending time with loved ones, dancing, or anything else you enjoy. Filling your life with these positive experiences can help you move on and rediscover yourself.

Building new connections as you rediscover who you are can help you find meaning in your life outside of the relationship. Being in a relationship isn’t the only meaningful thing in life, and you’ll feel better when you invest yourself in other areas.

2. Give Yourself Time and Grace

You can heal from infidelity but still experience pain when thinking about it. It might hurt for a while, so give yourself time to overcome and let go of the pain. Healing is a process that takes different amounts of time for everyone, so be patient and give yourself grace along the way.

3. Speak to a Professional

The emotions that come with emotional recovery are intense and heavy. It’s sometimes more than you can handle alone, and a therapist can help guide you through it. You can feel confident that you’re moving on in a healthy way when you get professional help.

A professional can give you advice specific to your situation. If you get lost in your thoughts, a therapist can help you work through them as they offer insight others can’t.

4. Work Toward Forgiveness

You can forgive someone for cheating without staying in the relationship, so this step works for everyone. If you choose to stay, you’ll want to forgive and work on building your relationship back. However, forgiveness is just as important if you leave the relationship.

Forgiveness takes time, so don’t rush the process and assume it happens automatically. You must focus on building your life and finding meaning again to make it happen. When you forgive, it takes power away from the person who hurt you as you won’t experience pain from them anymore.

While you might want to get even, it won’t help you get any closer to forgiveness. You might want to act out in anger and do things to hurt them in return, but you should avoid it. It won’t do you any good and’ll only slow your emotional recovery.

5. Get Tested for Sexually Transmitted Infections

While the emotional aspect of being cheated on is overwhelming, there are still other things to deal with. When your significant other has other sexual partners, it increases your risk of developing sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Getting tested allows you to take control of the situation by ensuring you’re free of disease.

If you get tested and find out that you have an STI, you can begin treatment immediately. However, if your results come back clear, you can eliminate that worry from your life.

6. Turn to Your Loved Ones

When your partner cheats, spending time with your loved ones can help you on your road to emotional recovery. However, please don’t rush off to everyone you know and give them all of the details of what happened. Choose a few close people in your life to confide in and lean on them when times get hard.

It might be tempting to isolate yourself as you experience a rollercoaster of emotions, but it’s not going to help. You don’t have to go through the healing process alone, so reach out for support or company.

7. Take Time to Decide What You Want to Do About Your Relationship

Part of emotional recovery is also deciding if you want to stay in the relationship. Sometimes it’s possible to repair the damage and stay together, but you must consider if it will work. You must first talk to your partner to figure out why it happened and how you can repair it together.

It’s essential that you feel safe and loved in your relationship, and if those things aren’t present, it isn’t beneficial. Either way, it’s a tough choice to make, but it’ll help with your emotional recovery. This situation is different for everyone, so trust your gut and do what is best for you.

You might want to spend a little time alone for soul-searching without distractions and unwarranted opinions. Deciding how to proceed after infidelity requires searching within for the answers.

If you think you’ll always be suspicious or unable to move on, it might not be best to continue. However, if you’re able to forgive and let it go, staying together could work for you. The decision is ultimately up to you, so look within for the answers as you decide.

8. Acknowledge and Accept How You’re Feeling

This traumatic experience comes with many emotions, and accepting them can’t be hard. You might feel upset, betrayed, let down, and angry. You likely even question your self-worth.

Your negative emotions must be acknowledged and accepted to experience emotional healing. The feelings are normal, so don’t deny or push them away. Acknowledging your feelings will help you let go of anger and other emotions to feel better again.

Accepting your emotions won’t always be easy, so you must find a way to do so. One idea is to write about the way you’re feeling.

Pull out your journal and detail your recurring thoughts and emotions, allowing you to think about one aspect at a time. As you work your way through each emotion, you’ll not only express your pain but also helps you process and move forward.

9. Let go of Blame

It’s easy to blame yourself for your partner’s cheating, but it isn’t your fault. Blaming yourself destroys your self-esteem, making you feel like you aren’t good enough. When the person you thought was committed to you cheats, you question everything about yourself.

Avoid blaming yourself by remembering that cheating isn’t personal. Your partner chose to do something hurtful, and there’s no excuse for the behavior. Blaming yourself is unhealthy, and it won’t help your healing process.

10. Prioritize Self-Care

Infidelity can take an emotional and physical toll on you, so you must prioritize self-care. You likely have more stress than usual, and it can be hard to complete your daily tasks. By prioritizing self-care, you give yourself the energy and mindset for moving forward.

Focus on treating yourself like you’d treat a friend or loved one during a hard time. Give yourself love and respect because you deserve it just as much as those closest to you. Take care of your mind and body by doing the following:

Get enough sleep
Eat nutritious foods
Give yourself time to reflect
Exercise daily
Do something fun
Avoid toxic influence
Practicing positive affirmations

Final Thoughts on Steps to Emotional Recovery from Cheating

If you get cheated on, it’s a devastating situation with many negative feelings. It can be hard to understand infidelity, but you can acknowledge and accept your feelings. Emotional recovery from cheating takes time, but you can make it happen by focusing on moving forward.

Use these steps to emotional recovery to help you let go of anger and other emotions. When you let go, you’ll start feeling much better. The healing process takes time, so give yourself time and grace as you work through the situation.

10 Behaviors Highly Sensitive Children Display Without Realizing It

April 4, 2022 by Chris Butler

Highly sensitive children look the same on the outside as other kids. But inside, they are wired differently, and their processing is dissimilar. They handle and react to situations differently, and many parents don’t know how to address these challenges. These beautiful children can give and receive love, but they often need more guidance and direction to manage their disabilities.

An HS child can be aggressive, energetic, relentless, and passionate all in the same day. Though these kids are incredibly wise and sympathetic, life as you know it has many challenges and limits for them. Dealing with this kid can be overwhelming for the parent. But it would help if you considered what the child is feeling inside that is causing these behaviors.

Have you ever been in a grocery store and observed a parent struggling to quiet their child? It never fails; no matter what time of day you go, at least one kid is having a complete meltdown. Rather than casting judgment on the parents trying their hardest to calm the child, look at things through a different set of lenses.

These kids often have a fit, not because they can’t have a new toy because their senses are overloaded. A person on a high sensory overload can experience terrorizing feelings from the beeping of the cash registers, the rustling of many shopping cartwheels, and the low roar from the chattering of people nearby.

The child is often young and cannot tell you exactly how they feel, yet the only way they communicate is by their behaviors. Regularly, that screaming child who appears to be undisciplined is struggling, and they don’t know any other way to tell their parents than to fall to pieces.

Ten Signs Displayed in Highly Sensitive Children

Diagnosing a sensory input issue is not always easy. The first symptoms are hyperactivity, temper tantrums, and other typical behaviors of ADHD. To further confuse things, ADHD is also a neurological disorder that can mimic some of the issues of HS, according to an article published in Scary Symptoms.

Since the prevalence of ADHD has grown, doctors feel safe giving this diagnosis to children who fit the diagnostic criteria. However, it takes a doctor attuned to the patient to understand that the child is in sensory overload. If you think your child may have this condition or has already been diagnosed, here are symptoms you may observe.

1. Highly Sensitive Children Often Analyze (Overthink!) Everything

To protect themselves from the world around them, highly sensitive children become processors. Their little brains are constantly working and analyzing everything to keep them safe. They can notice minor things, even a change in the tone of your voice. While this analyzing gift is helpful in some areas, it can also mean that they get overwhelmed more easily.

2. Fearful of New Situations and Changes

When it comes to significant changes, like moving to a new classroom, highly sensitive children will resist. They have a comfort zone that they’ve developed to keep themselves safe, and they will cling to those comforts for assurance. New situations bring intense anxiety, and they may ruminate on questions internally like:

Where am I?
Who are all these people?
Will they be kind to me or mean?
How do I know if they will like me?
Am I safe here, or should I be worried?
Can I do what these people expect of me?

They will be on edge with new situations, sending them into overdrive. It’s imperative to help prepare an HS child well in advance to make them comfortable with changes.

3. Emotional Extremes Often Display in Highly Sensitive Children

The HS child will experience continuous emotional extremes. While stubbing a toe might be something another kid can shake off, the highly sensitive child will feel this much deeper. Their feelings and experiences are wired to feel quite different from a fully functioning neurological system.

Many parents of these children recognize that they can be elated or enraged, and there’s no happy medium. This child tends to live at extremes, making life quite chaotic. They can be pretty demanding of their parents’ times while other children get pushed to the sidelines.

4. Prone to Perfectionism

Highly sensitive children are sore losers by nature, as they tend to be perfectionists. Their brain tells them that things need to be one way, and when they have a moment where they feel like they’re losing control, they cannot cope. Constructive criticism comes across as criticism, and they feel shame in greater magnitudes than most kids.

5. Highly Senitive Children Might Be Extra Self-conscious and Easily Slighted

The highly sensitive child often feels easily slighted. They tend to be more self-conscious than other kids, and they’re always worried about how others see them. They don’t like to be the center of attention, whether for good or bad issues.

6. Experience Extreme Emotions When Being Corrected

If the HS child gets into trouble, they will feel like you’re personally coming down on them. They don’t see it as you’re correcting them or offering guidance. When faced with this perceived rejection, they may start laughing, become intensely angry, or run to avoid this confrontation.

While you may feel infuriated when a child is laughing in your face, they’re using it as a coping mechanism to protect themselves from the flood of emotions they’re feeling.

7. Enhanced Sensory Input Reactions

Since highly sensitive children have different internal wiring, their emotions make them more susceptible to the sensory response. Though the lights in the doctor’s office might not bother you, they can be blinding to a child with HS. Things like the automatic flushing toilet in the restroom at the mall may terrify them, and they may avoid bathrooms because of it.

If a food has a strong smell that they find unpleasant, they won’t even try it before turning it away. Clothes are another significant issue for the HS child. They prefer the comfort of things like sweatpants and will have a complete temper tantrum when you try to put them in scratchy jeans. These kids feel overwhelmed with sensations they can’t cope with effectively, intensifying their emotional responses.

8. Low Tolerance for Frustration

These kids have a lower tolerance for frustration as they’re attuned to the world around them as they know it. They will often experience distress when tackling a task they cannot accomplish, like learning to ride a bike. While you know that you must work to master a new skill, they see this as an unreachable goal that furthers frustration.

They may refuse to ride a bike because the risks make their sensory issues increase.

9. Rigid and Inflexible Behaviors Are Often Seen in Highly Sensitive Children

HS children don’t like their schedule or anything around them to be interrupted. To make their life more manageable, they rely on things to be rigid. While things come across to you as irrational demands to have a specific type of socks or foods that doesn’t touch one another on the plate, it’s how they cope with their situation.

These little mechanisms help them bring order to a world that seems so out of order to them.

10. Meltdowns Due to Stress

Some kids are more prone to temper tantrums and meltdowns because of sensitivity issues. Any stress can trigger them, and when they feel overwhelmed, their reactions are often oversized. These tantrums can be intense and leave both parent and child physically exhausted.

Final Thoughts on Highly Sensitive Children

While highly sensitive children seem few and far between, it’s actually more common than what you might imagine. According to Parenting for Brain, it occurs in around fifteen to twenty percent of the population. The problem is that many children go undiagnosed because it’s easier to put labels on them like ADHD rather than to dive deeper into what’s going on neurologically.

Another thing to consider is that many adults have sensory processing disorders that they’ve had since childhood. These adults often didn’t get the help or diagnosis they needed as a child, especially since attention to this issue is relatively new.

Whether it’s in a child or an adult, the signals sent to the brain to process things get misinterpreted. The blanket that doesn’t have a silk-lined edge might be bearable to most people, but it’s unbearable and scratchy to the HS person. This individual lives in the same world as you, but it’s perceived in an entirely different manner.

Dealing with highly sensitive children and their sensory input issues can be quite taxing. The meltdowns are frequent, and the inability for change makes things a challenge. A parent must become educated on how to help their child and view things through their eyes.

One of the best tools to help people understand sensory processing issues is posted by The Autism Site. Once you view this video and observe the overwhelming sounds and sights for the person with processing issues, it can help you understand what your child might be experiencing.

7 Ways A Positive Mindset Is Better Than a Negative One

April 4, 2022 by Kristen Butler

The age-old question to determine if you’re a pessimist or an optimist is whether you see the glass as half-empty or half-full. This adage is about more than just a glass, as it can demonstrate your outlook on life. Most people don’t understand the direct connection between a positive mindset and your overall health, but it’s essential to realize your thoughts’ impact on you.

Some folks think that you must ignore the bad things that happen to you to stay positive. There’s no way around those bad days, but it’s all about your attitude and how you handle these situations. The first way to be positive is to use self-talk to combat negative thought processes.

Negative self-talk happens because you have numerous misconceptions running through your mind, and you may also lack information and jump to conclusions.

All these unspoken thoughts that race through your mind will either be positive or negative and if you have more bad than good thoughts, it shows your mindset. Alas, it doesn’t mean all hope is lost. You have the power to change your mindset and your entire life.

Jumping to Conclusions

When these negative thoughts come your way, you can counter them with something positive. For instance, you’re sitting in the breakroom, and a coworker walks in, and it’s someone with whom you don’t have a good relationship.

You instantly start having ruminating thoughts about why this person doesn’t like you, as you did nothing to them. By the end of lunch, you’re sure that they hate you. The truth is this person is timid and doesn’t talk much because of their insecurities.

Your mind concocted a whole scenario that wasn’t true based on misinformation. See how easy it is to get your mind off on the wrong track? But what if you looked at this person in a different light?

Would it change how you feel and the dynamics between you two? You could be missing out on a remarkable friendship because someone doesn’t act or talk in a way that you find acceptable.

Why a Positive Mindset Is Better

You know that walking in positivity is the best way to live, but you need reasons why you should change your mentality. Here are some ways that a positive mindset can make you a better person and enhance your entire life.

1. You’ll Live Longer if You Keep a Positive Mindset

It sounds too good to be accurate, but research has proven that if you stress less, you will live longer. When you’re constantly fretting about the day-to-day occurrences in your life, then you’re going to cause more inflammation in your body. According to a study conducted by the Mayo Clinic, you have a fifty percent less chance of dying early when you have a positive mindset.

Their study was conducted over thirty years, and they found that those folks who stayed positive had a much better life and better health than those who were pessimistic.

2. You’ll Have Better Self-Esteem

Have you ever considered the first thoughts of your morning? If you wake up and start thinking about how bad your head and back hurt, as well as all the things on your to-do list, you defeat yourself before you even begin. Your attitude is a significant indication of your overall feelings of self.

If you think positively, you can increase your self-esteem and learn to see yourself in a more positive light. Your first thoughts of the day should be that you have breath in your body, food on your table, and are going to have a wonderful day. Changing how you think can increase your esteem and put a boost in your step.

An attitude of gratitude is always more appealing to others and the Universe.

3. You’re Less Likely to Struggle with Depression

Depression you experience can be circumstantial or genetics. Some situations are out of your control, and it’s challenging to have optimism when you’re dealing with job loss, death, or another major upheaval. However, having a negative mindset can cause you great distress.

Did you know that according to studies from the National Library of Medicine, negative people have a higher rate of being depressed? When you dwell on the harmful and toxic things in your life, they will consume your mind. Negativity is like cancer that grows and takes over an area decaying everything it touches.

Once you allow these toxins to start growing in your mind, it won’t be long until it takes over and poisons the good.

4. A Positive Mindset Attracts New Opportunities

Let’s assume that you received a pink slip from your job. You’re angry, bitter, and feel like life has given you a significant blow. The positive person would realize that there are many jobs out there, and it’s just a matter of time till you find another one.

However, the negative person will think of all the bills coming due, and impending doom will set in. You will immediately begin searching for new employment, but your attitude could dictate how quickly that process happens. If you go to interviews with a negative attitude and talk about how wrong the other company did you, the prospective employer will be less likely to hire you.

If you’re bad-mouthing your old company, then they feel that you could also do the same to their business. However, if you walk into an interview, act thankful for the experiences you’ve been given, and are happy to start the next chapter, things could be quite different. Employers judge a book by its cover, as it’s all they can go by initially.

When you put your best foot forward, you’re more likely to have people and good things attracted to you. Optimism is so much more appealing than pessimism, and basking in a positive nature will allow the world to be your oyster.

5. You’ll Have Better Coping Skills

Positive coping tactics are measures you take to control and reduce the stresses you face so that they will not be harmful or damaging to you in the long term. People who use these positive approaches are not only better able to confront challenges, but they’re also able to bounce back from these challenging times.

Additionally, they can be much happier even though their world isn’t perfect. Coping tactics are these tiny aids you develop that help you bounce back in life. Inevitably, things will not always go your way, and you will face some storms.

However, when you have good coping skills in place, you can manage and reduce these situations’ impact on you. For instance, your coping mechanism may be to meditate and call a trusted mentor when you feel overwhelmed. This is certainly better than hitting the local bar and drinking till you pass out or burying your head in a container of ice cream.

A positive mindset will help you bounce back and lessen the impact of whatever comes your way.

6. People Will Want to Be Around You

Positivity will attract more people to you, and you will have more friends than you know what to do within your life. No one wants to hang around someone who is all about doom and gloom, as it can be a lot to handle. Do you have a friend or relative that’s just exhausting to be around?

You may learn to avoid this person because they always seem like a wet blanket that appears to smolder the life out of everyone. People are attracted to those that make them feel better about life and themselves. You’re going to find that the positive people in life have larger inner circles, and people want to be around them because they’re enjoyable and make you feel good.

7. You’ll Have More Motivation with a Positive Mindset

A positive mindset can help you accomplish all the dreams and goals you have for your life. Everyone has a bucket list, and it takes motivation to cross things off this list. Positivity puts fuel in your tank and pushes you forward when you don’t think you can go another mile.

When obstacles come your way, it encourages you to keep going. It helps you to be motivated to get all the things you want. You can do far more than you ever imagined possible when you believe in yourself.

Final Thoughts on Adopting a Positive Mindset

When your brain adopts a positive mindset, you’ll have greater resilience and resourcefulness. You’ll easily set goals and achieve them, as well as live longer and better. It doesn’t mean those nasty things won’t happen to you, but it means that you will have an effective coping mechanism to help you overcome them.

Do you see the glass as half-empty or half-full, and what can you do to change your perceptions? You can do and become more than you ever thought possible if only you alter how you feel.

6 Behaviors That Can Predict Narcissistic Rage

April 4, 2022 by Deborah Tayloe

Remember the wicked queen in the classic story of Snow White? When her mirror said Snow White was more beautiful, the queen became jealous. This story may be a fairy tale, but it’s a classic case of narcissistic rage that’s a reality.

On the surface, narcissists seem calm, controlled, and self-centered. It’s a ruse to hide their internal insecurities and anger. Anyone or anything that threatens them will ignite their wrath.

Often, the slightest things make them explode, as managing anger doesn’t come easy. A misinterpreted word or perceived slight is all it takes to send them into a frenzy. They are at boiling point in an instant before you know what happened.

Six Telling Behaviors that Predict Narcissistic Rage

The more you understand this personality and the disorder, the better prepared you are to deal with them, and once set off, they can’t control the rage. Most narcissists have comparable triggers that can make them lose their temper. Here are six behavior patterns and possible scenarios to consider.

1. Disproportionate Reactions

Given the right stressor, narcissistic rage can be set off at any time. You’ll notice that these personalities often have a fiery fit that’s blown way out of proportion. They can get so angry that it seems they are fueled by hate.

Example: You ordered a pair of shoes for them online, and the shoes that arrived were the wrong size. It’s an easy fix by returning the package to get the correct size. However, this person goes into a harsh tirade about how careless you are and that the online company is incompetent.

2. The Short-lived Storm

Although narcissistic rage can explode out of nowhere, these episodes are often short-lived. The eruption can cease almost as quickly as it started, and the toxic person may act like it never happened. They may try to shift the blame on you for making them boil with rage.

Example: The two of you are enjoying what you hoped would be a pleasant dinner at a new restaurant. The romantic scenario grinds to a halt when your narcissistic partner rants and raves at the server for putting onions on their sandwich. After embarrassing you, the server, and the other diners, they remove the onions and eat as if nothing happened.

3. A Volatile Situation on Hand

Narcissists use these irrational outbursts to control others. They also use narcissistic rage to discharge their anxiety and put others on the defensive. What’s more, their wrath can escalate to verbal and physical violence.

A classic example of a selfish fury turning violent is road rage. While not all road rages are linked with a narcissistic personality, these eruptions are typical. Not only can they explode in a litany of verbal abuse, but they can threaten the offensive driver with physical harm.

4. When the Table Turns

Some of the worst temper triggers for narcissists are when they perceive humiliation, confrontation, or loss of control. In extreme cases, they can turn their ire on themselves and cause self-harm. Since they adore themselves above all others, self-harm can be unintentional.

Example: You’ve decided that you want to sever a romantic relationship with your narcissistic mate. Instead of giving in to their manipulation, you take a stand for yourself. Driving away in a fury, they total their car due to reckless driving.

5. The Ignored Narcissist

There’s nothing a narcissist craves more than the limelight. They are on their best behavior when being showered with praise and attention. If they perceive that anyone’s light is a tad bit brighter, that person will face their wrath.

It’s almost like a toddler having a temper tantrum over a toy in the department store. The mood may go from grumbling and whining to a full-blown fit. Narcissists demand all the attention or else.

Example: You and your partner have decided to make it official and get married. Everyone is thrilled for you except the narcissist who’s supposed to be your best friend. Instead of gladly helping you plan your wedding, they pout, whine, and are mad at you because they want the attention.

6. Called on the Carpet

You may avoid the narcissist’s ire if you allow them to control you and be your cheerleader. The minute you confront them about a lie or criticize them in the least, you’re in their verbal crosshairs. They use unbridled anger to cope with their anxiety of losing control.

They guard their exaggerated self-image fiercely and will lash out if they think you tarnish it. Even if your criticism is loving and constructive or they’ve overstepped their boundaries, their temper will flare. Narcissists often refuse to accept any shortcomings or own up to mistakes.

Example: A narcissistic coworker calls you home to gripe about office politics. You’ve expressly told them you’re not interested in these gossip games, especially in your private time. After you confront their behavior, they get angry and spread vicious rumors about you in the office.

How to Avoid Narcissistic Rage

It can be physically, mentally, and emotionally draining to cope with a narcissist and their rage. The good news is that you needn’t be a target of these volatile temper tantrums. Here are a few ways to avoid explosive drama.

1. Get Out of the Way of Narcissistic Rage

According to an article by the Mayo Clinic, narcissistic personalities usually lack empathy and have problems controlling emotions and actions. If they turn their rage on you, create some distance from them. Go into another room or go outside if their anger turns violent.

2. Keep Your Cool

You’re feeding the narcissist’s ego if you react out of anger or frustration. They want to see you feel uncomfortable because it means they’re in control. Do your best to take a breath, be calm, and refuse to participate in their antics.

Try something like meditation or other relaxation techniques. Avoid the urge to yell or fight fire with fire. If you control your rage, you’re not giving them any ammunition.

3. Take a Break

Brief pauses and space are essential for managing anger outbursts from abusive narcissists. When you’re in a confrontation with this person, pause and take a breath before saying anything. They’ll often finish their rants, and you can walk the other way for some space.

4. Realize You Are Not Responsible for the Narcissistic Rage

Furious tirades of selfish people are often peppered with personal insults and blame-shifting. It’s important to realize that they’re the person with the issue, not you. A narcissistic personality disorder is usually established at a young age, and there’s nothing you did to take responsibility for it.

5. Establish Boundaries

There are many stable times that you can reason with a narcissist. Consider a neutral discussion about how you expect to be treated. If they cross a line and blow their top, you’ll walk away and not discuss it until they can do it calmly.

6. Give Consequences for Their Narcissistic Rage

Unfortunately, narcissists consider others weak and unable to take up for themselves. They may listen to your boundaries, but these are only words unless you act. If you tell them the consequences for disrespecting your limits, follow through and send them a message.

Other Narcissistic Rage Situations to Consider

Just because you are paid to do a job doesn’t mean anyone gets to abuse you, whether boss or coworker. If it’s a coworker, tell them you won’t tolerate their abusive outbursts. You may consider talking to a higher authority if they can’t respect your boundaries.

What if the narcissist is your supervisor? You can still go over their heads to human resources if necessary. However, the situation may be unfixable, and you may consider getting another job.

The Raging Stranger

Narcissistic temper flares can be especially frightening if you don’t know the person. You never know if this ranting stranger is going to turn violent. Don’t engage with their fury; you must escape them.

You should call 911 if you feel threatened or like the person has become dangerous enough to hurt themselves or someone else.

The Toxic Family Member

Blood may be thicker than water, but it doesn’t entitle any toxic relative to abuse you. Some relatives you must love from a distance, even parents, siblings, or adult children. Stick to your boundaries and refuse to be part of their anger-infused situations.

When Enough is Enough

Narcissistic temper flares usually include abusive language and often become violent. Your safety and peace of mind are more important than your ego. You needn’t be the object of their abuse and can get help if necessary.

Final Thoughts on Identifying Narcissistic Rage and Avoiding It

Narcissists have a personality disorder that affects all personal and professional relationships. They may believe that everything about them is dynamite, but you’ll soon learn it’s the explosive kind. You’ll either learn techniques to help during these times, or you will steer clear of their fury until they get the help they need.

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