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15 Signs A Couple Will Stay in Love Forever

Why do some relationships last only months while others last years or decades? Staying in love for the long haul has much to do with your personality, but it’s really about how you treat one another. How do some folks make it for eternity while others barely get a start before calling it quits?

Everyone knows that maintaining a marriage while being a celebrity is a challenge. In fact, it’s quite common for people to switch partners many times, as the grueling schedules and wealth take its toll. One of the long-time married couples in Hollywood was Jerry Stiller and Anna Meara.

At the time of her death in 2015, the couple had been together for over 61 years, according to Just Riches. They acted on sitcoms and had a life in the spotlight for many years, including bringing their two children, Amy and Ben, into the mix. When asked about the key to making their marriage work, they both agreed that it was Meara’s kind nature and that she was very forgiving.

Another thing in their favor was that the couple never cared about money. They didn’t fight about spending and would have traded all the wealth away if it meant they could stay in love forever. The same article mentions James Garner and Louis Clarke and their marriage of over 59 years.

All it took for Garner and Clarke was one date to know that their relationship was kismet. If Hollywood couples can make it this long with all the stressors of show business, how much easier it must be for a couple who doesn’t have these pressures to thrive?

Fifteen Signs A Couple Will Stay in Love Forever

Maybe the person you’re with is the one for you, or maybe someone else out there would be a better match. Staying in love is more about choice and commitment above all else. Here are some signs that your relationship has a chance of being forever.

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1. Spending Time Together is Important for a Couple to Stay in Love

It doesn’t matter how busy you are or what time constraints exist; you will find time to be together. Even if it’s eating dinner at 2 am because of work schedules, you do whatever’s possible to spend time with them as they hold a high ranking in your heart and life. You can’t imagine not dating them or having that particular time to connect at some point during the day or week.

2. Conversations are Good

There’s never a moment of silence, as you find pleasure in talking about anything and everything. You could sit and listen to their voice for hours, and just being together and sharing new stories and discovering things is perfect for you. You know everything that is going on in their work life, and they know all about yours, as you two don’t keep any secrets.

3. They are the First Person You Want to Run To When You Have Troubles

Sometimes the world is cruel, and you want to run and hide. Your partner is the first person you want to run to with your troubles, as you trust them. They’re affectionate and will wrap their arms around you in support. With them, the problems seem to melt away in their embrace.

4. You Text or Call Each Other Several Times a Day

Whenever you get a break at work or have a free moment, you check in with your partner. You want to make sure they’re having a good day, and if you’re having a bad day, it’s even more reason to text. Even though you are far apart, you’re still very much connected.

5. You Have Each Other’s Backs

You know that no one will talk badly about you or do anything to hurt you, at least while your partner is around. They have your back better than a bodyguard, and you feel safe knowing they’re watching out for you. No one protects you better than them, and they make the world seem better when they’re by your side.

6. You Care About One Another

You put their needs and desires above yours, as you care much about them. When you think about the next car you buy, you’re concerned about safety ratings and ensuring they’re safe on the roads. Your love for them is limitless, and you both go above and beyond to care for one another.

7. While Others Might See You Have Flaws, They See Them as Strengths

You know that your partner loves you because they see your flaws and view them as strengths. While others might say you’re overbearing and sometimes loud, they see it as the very reason you’re so successful in business. They look at you through the eyes of love as even your imperfections seem valuable.

8. You Only Use Nicknames

You use nicknames once you hit a certain comfort level with one another. These “pet names” confirm that you get each other on a deeper level. Using pet names often shows that your relationship is strong. It’s a way of showing affection and projecting tenderness that is a particular term of endearment.

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9. You Can’t Imagine Life Without Them, So It’s a Priority to Stay in Love

You’re lost without them if they get called out of town on business or other matters. Your connection is so strong that you go together like a hand and glove, and it feels odd and likes something is missing when they’re gone.

10. You Can Read Each Other’s Thoughts

The two of you have a system with one another. You can stay in love because you can read each other’s minds without speaking. You’ve honed this skill well because you use it all the time. Even in a crowded room, you can glance across to see them and know exactly what they’re thinking.

Psychologists call this superior empathic accuracy, and it comes from familiarity. According to the article, couples who have this ability have stronger closeness and have more satisfying relationships.

11. They Pick You Up, Not Tear You Down

It takes a solid person to shoulder both their burdens and yours, but your partner seems to have mastered it. They’re honest with you when you’ve done wrong, but they would never tear you down. They offer constructive criticism to make you a better person, and you take their advice to heart.

12. They Are Your Biggest Fan and Loudest Cheerleader

They’re the first to praise you when you do something unique, like graduate from college or get a new job. They will take you to dinner or a surprise party to celebrate with you. They have your back more than you know and knowing they’re always there cheering you on from the sidelines is what brings you comfort.

13. You’re Both Eager to Forgive if You Hope to Stay in Love

A relationship takes two people who forgive easily to work. They state that holding grudges wastes time and only develops further hurts.

The couples that learn to forgive each other when they do wrong are the ones that will stay in love forever. Rather than harboring ill feelings, their communication will let them work through it.

14. A Couple Striving to Stay in Love Will Listen More Than Speak

Your communication is excellent, but you must listen more than you speak. Nothing else matters when your partner speaks, including your opinion. You take the time and chance to talk about what’s going on in their life and mind, as it increases your bond.

15. They Are Your Person

The term “My person” came from the relationship between Dr. Meredith Grey and Dr. Cristina Yang on the tv show  Gray’s Anatomy. These two became close friends as residents at one of the biggest hospitals in the country. They only became closer through all the tests and tribulations they went through.

They called one another “my person ” when they discussed their relationship.” This term of endearment describes someone who has an unbreakable bond with you. This individual gets you on a level that no one else ever has before or might. They’re honest with you, even when you’re wrong, and they’re the ones you want by your side.

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Final Thoughts on Couples Who Stay in Love Forever

It’s commonplace for people to question whether or not the person they’re with is their “ride or die.” You want to ensure you don’t waste time on the wrong person when the right one is waiting for you. While no test can definitively tell you they’re “the one,” you can look for the synchronicities and other details.

If you want to stay in love for the long haul, you want someone affectionate, your biggest cheerleader, who puts your needs above theirs. They get you on a level that no one else does, so much so that you can even read their mind without them saying a word. While each relationship looks different, the communication and how you care about one another will be the same across the board.

15 Mental Hacks to Help Increase Positive Thinking

Do you mourn in the rain, or do you open your umbrella and dance among the puddles? Life often hurls pain, loss, and other negative situations in your path. Your resilience and how you react can make the difference between overcoming or being defeated. In fact, when you increase positive thinking, you really make the difference between those two outcomes.

Fifteen Mental Hacks to Increase Positive Thinking

While you can’t prevent life’s storms from raging against you, your positive attitude can keep you afloat. It takes time and patience to become an optimist instead of a pessimist. Consider these fifteen habits to increase your positive thinking.

1. Keep a Sense of Humor

One of the best characteristics to have is a keen sense of humor. The Greek philosopher, Epictetus, admired those who could laugh at themselves. He said they’d never run out of things to keep them laughing.

Sometimes, a little levity can ease tensions in a room and offer a different perspective. Laughter is also a balm to your soul and can promote a positive attitude. Try watching a classic comedy or spend time with a hilarious friend who makes you giggle.

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2. Spend Time Outdoors to Increase Positive Thinking

It’s hard to be glum and gloomy outside in the glories of nature. Spending time outdoors can lower your stress levels and boost your mood. The fresh air rejuvenates your lungs, brain, and the rest of your body.

Consider taking time daily to walk through the forest, a park, or any nearby green area. Admire the stately trees, enjoy the colorful foliage, and watch the birds and other woodland creatures. This experience costs you nothing, yet it is more valuable than anything.

3. Perform Random Acts of Kindness

Another way to cultivate positive thinking is to be kind to others in word and deed. You’re expected to do nice things for people in your circle. It’s part of a reciprocal relationship.

However, what about surprising a total stranger with an act of kindness? Perhaps you buy a stranger a cup of coffee or mow a new neighbor’s lawn for a welcome gift. These free and random acts of kindness often return to you and give you an optimistic outlook.

4. Give Your Mind a Break

Even when you’re fast asleep, your brain cannot keep your vital organs alive. Plus, it’s recharging your brain cells and filing information into short or long-term memory. It’s full steam ahead when you’re awake, so no wonder your brain gets tired.

Giving your mind a much-needed break can boost your mood and encourage positivity. When you feel like the walls are closing in and you’re overwhelmed, take a break, and do something relaxing. Although your brain never sleeps, it can revive with a bit of diversion.

5. You Increase Positive Thinking if You Practice Gratitude Everyday

Sincere gratitude benefits you and the people surrounding you. For example, you thank someone who gave you a gift. You’re blessed with talent, and the giver is blessed with your gratitude. A grateful mindset discourages envy and self-centeredness.

Awaken each morning with gratitude for another day of life. Perform each daily task mindfully and gratefully. Remember words of appreciation like “please,” “thank-you,” and “you’re welcome.”

6. Look For the Positive in Bad Situations

Amid a troublesome situation, positive thinking doesn’t come quickly. An article published by the Psychological Bulletin discusses the irony of negativity bias. This common bias is when your brain pays more attention to negative situations, even though positive ones outnumber them.

It’s easy to take negativity bias to heart and wallow in a hostile atmosphere. However, positive thinking helps you find life lessons in your trials and use them as learning curves. You can acknowledge the pain, learn from it, and leave it in the past.

7. Increase Positive Thinking by Surrounding Yourself with Positive People

Whether you realize it or not, you absorb the atmosphere of a room, be it positive or negative. Have you ever noticed that you can be in a good mood and spend time with an old grump? By the time you part ways, your mood probably sank into the mire like there was.

A positive thought process thrives around those with the same mindset. According to the law of attraction, surrounding yourself with positive energy attracts more. You also tend to have a greater sense of well-being when you’re in a lively group.

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8. Don’t Ruminate on Negative Thoughts

The law of attraction is unbiased, and sending negative thoughts into the Universe will attract more negativity for you. It’s a vicious cycle often caused by ruminating on your past failures and shortcomings.

Rumination can have physical and mental consequences. It may increase negative thinking and cause depression and anxiety.

Instead, find ways to learn from your experiences and leave them in the past. Do it if you need to forgive someone or ask for forgiveness yourself. It’s also helpful to let go of things you can’t change or control.

9. Share Your Thoughts with a Trusted Friend

Some of life’s burdens seem lighter when you share them with a trusted friend or loved one. Frank discussions with an empathetic friend may help you get a fresh perspective. Maybe they can increase positive thinking and help you find possible solutions.

Emotional support builds camaraderie and a positive atmosphere. If they choose to self-disclose, you may often discover your situation isn’t unique. There’s an excellent reason why people need each other’s company.

10. Keep Your Self-Talk Upbeat

Everyone has a little voice that’s like a constant narrator. Unfortunately, negative self-talk can make you feel hopeless and give you the impression that you’ll never win. If you internalize these conversations, you’ll affirm them to the Universe and never be successful.

The good news is that you have the power to change your self-talk. Change your vocabulary to positively charged ones like “can” and “will.” Make your positive affirmations aloud and learn to attract more positive gifts into your life.

11. Exercise Every Day

Make daily treks to the gym to reap benefits from exercise. Did you know that exercise increases your endorphins and other “feel good” hormones? Plus, you’re doing your body a favor by toning and strengthening your muscles and joints.

You can create an exercise regimen right for you in your home. Consider strengthening, core, and aerobic sessions to work different body parts. Even a daily brisk walk can improve your health and increase your positive outlook.

12. Keep a Journal

Since written language began, humans have recorded world events, local happenings, and personal history. Indeed, they give future generations a window into past glories and tragedies. Some famous examples of diarists include Samuel Pepys and Anne Frank.

Your journal may not record notorious historical times, but it’s your story. Use your journal to list your thoughts, ideas, and goals. You can also record how positive thinking helped you overcome your bleakest moments.

13. Get Enough Sleep to Increase Positive Thinking

When you don’t sleep enough, you feel like a zombie searching for the next cup of coffee. Sleep deprivation leaves you in a brain fog, feeling drained and grumpy. It’s the perfect setting for negative energy to seep in and make you feel worse.

Your body, mind, and spirit depend on getting the right sleep each night. When your entire being is revitalized, you’re in good spirits, and positive thoughts come quickly. You have the energy to be more productive and enjoy some recreation.

14. Take a Media Break

Whether it’s news from your smartphone, computer, or tv, the media perpetually blasts you with doom and gloom. Not only do these news commentators drag you through the muck of current adverse events, but they surmise worst cases. When you’ve finished your morning cup of Joe, you feel drained and depressed.

Get your mind off these woeful reports and give yourself a media break. The world will not stop if you don’t watch the 24/7 news feeds. In the evenings, spend quality time with your loved ones and put your phone, TV, and computer on hold. You can replace negativity with a fresh supply of positive thinking.

15. You’ll Increase Positive Thinking When You Practice Mindfulness

It isn’t easy to comprehend that the past and future don’t exist. There’s nothing you can do to alter history you don’t know challenges lie ahead of you. What does exist is present, and you have the power to make a difference at this moment.

You can improve living in the present with mindful practices like meditation or yoga. These ancient tools help you bring your thoughts into captivity and, for the moment, “be.” As you let go of depression from the past and anxiety for the future, you create a positive frame of mind.

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Final Thoughts on Using Mental Hacks to Increase Your Positive Thinking

You can’t control every situation, but your attitude remains in your control. Deciding to overcome negativity with positive thinking can make a difference in all aspects of your life. You can soon realize the blessings of your divine heritage.

10 Reasons Why Snuggling Makes People Happier

You’ve worked a long day, and you’re exhausted. You can’t wait to get home because you know your partner’s arms are waiting for you, and their loving embrace keeps you going. There’s something about snuggling and that physical touch that makes everything better.

Why do people have such a hard time making space for physical contact? Folks in this country will make considerable sacrifices in their relationships to get more time to work. However, your intimacy with your partner, even on a different level with your children, matters more than you imagine.

Did you know that an intimate relationship can make you happier? Cuddling up next to someone you love is one of the easiest and best ways to experience intimacy, and the other party also feels the benefits. Here’s something that might shock you, men enjoy snuggling and closeness just as much as women, according to a study by The Kinsey Institute and a report in International Business Times.

Why Snuggling with Your Loved One Makes You Happier?

While you know hugging feels good, did you also know it’s good for your body and soul? Ironically, cuddlers have become a hot topic recently, as people who long for that physical contact without intimacy are in high demand.

Specialty agencies charge premium fees to snuggle with a lonely person in such demand. There are no intimate acts, just feeling the warmth of another human close. There are many benefits to snuggling up next to the one you love, and here are just a few of them.

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1. Snuggling Relieves Pain

Physical contact with another human gets your feel-good hormones pumping, specifically oxytocin. Oxytocin is the hormone responsible for helping with things like social bonding. After an intimate moment, oxytocin rushes through the body, giving you that euphoric feeling, but you don’t need arousal to make these hormones surge.

It’s been proven that even a simple touch like a hug or a kiss on the cheek can stimulate the hypothalamus gland, which is the area that makes this hormone. So, the next time you have a headache or your back is in knots, try hugging someone for at least 3-5 minutes before you reach for an over-the-counter remedy. This natural medication has no side effects, and the benefits are undeniable.

2. Enhances Your Relationships

Where would you be in life without quality relationships? You know that it’s essential for you to communicate within these relationships, but don’t forget how important physical contact is. Your job and all the other responsibilities you have can take a toll on your interactions.

Rather than coming home and starting to cook dinner and get laundry going, why don’t you try cuddling with your partner for about ten minutes? It could be just the surge of feel-good hormones you need to make it through the night. Plus, it sends your partner a loud and clear message that you’re putting them first above all else that evening.

Putting this kind of attention in a relationship can do good things. Plus, it gives you time to rest before starting the next phase of your day.

3. Snuggling Increases the Bond Between Parent and Child

When you think of feel-good hormones, you wouldn’t guess that they exist in other contact forms. However, when a mother and child are breastfeeding, the same hormones are released.

The purpose here is different, though, as the hormones help mamma relax and feed her child easily, and it’s passed through the milk to the child to calm them. Have you ever noticed how a baby calms right down when feeding? Sure, they’re enjoying the milk, but those hormones are also settling them.

It’s just another of the incredible benefits of breastfeeding that many people don’t realize.

4. Snuggling Reduces Social Anxiety

You might benefit from a snuggle session if you constantly tend to have negative thoughts. That same hormone that makes you feel good can also inspire you to think more positively. Wouldn’t it be so much better to have an optimistic outlook rather than a pessimistic one?

Social anxiety is a horrible condition that can make you feel like a prisoner in your home when you can’t leave. However, if you take someone with you to the grocery store or a party, try hugging them or holding their hand. The surge of hormones your body experiences can help you counter those worried thoughts and make you feel less anxious.

5. Your Sleep Will Improve

Who couldn’t use better sleep? What if snuggling with your partner for about 10-20 minutes before you sleep could change how you rest? Well, a study conducted in 2020 from Frontiers in Psychiatry found that the boost of oxytocin released in cuddling can affect how long and how deep your sleep.

Why not try spooning for a portion of the night to keep those hormones flowing? Plus, it helps you bond with the one you love. When your anxiety levels are reduced and you enter a state of relaxation, you sleep better and have a better-quality rest.

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6. Reduces Your Chance of Heart Disease

When you manage your stress levels, you lower your chances of developing severe conditions like heart disease. Surging oxytocin levels also creates a chemical reaction that reduces your blood pressure and calms your central nervous system.

Elevated blood pressure left untreated can cause your heart to wear out before its time, especially if you’re under a significant amount of stress. Thankfully, hugs and snuggling can make you live longer and healthier too.

7. Snuggling Can Reduce Stress

This is such a vast topic it deserves another mention. Stress can kill you, and experts have repeatedly said this. However, when you can calm yourself through hugs or other physical contact, the feel-good hormones tend to melt the cares of life away. This positive effect is going to make you feel fulfilled and less angst.

8. Boosts Your Immunity

Have you heard that there’s power in positive thinking? Well, it truly works, which is why many psychologists are touting this phrase. If you’re negative and downtrodden all the time, it will wear on you.

However, there are tremendous benefits to your immunity from oxytocin. See, the feel-good hormone counters things like cortisol caused by stress. A system with an overabundance of stress hormones like adrenaline will take a toll on your immune system.

So, the next time someone throws their arms around you in an embrace, don’t be so eager to pull away. They’re helping you boost your immunity and keeping you from getting sick.

9. Snuggling Makes Intimacy Better

Another hormone that hasn’t been discussed yet, but can also release during moments of contact, is dopamine. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter much like serotonin and norepinephrine. It might also help to restore proper cell function, making the messages between the body and the brain work better.

You might not realize that dopamine can also help you increase your desire for your partner. So that simple hug after a long day might lead to more intimate moments in your life, which is never a bad thing.

10. Conveys Emotions Without Saying a Word

Sometimes the spoken word is hard for folks, especially when they can’t put their thought into a proper way to articulate. However, when you’re wrapped in an embrace, your bodies communicate in a way that speaks volumes. Holding someone can make you forget about your horrible day and let them know how much they mean to you.

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Final Thoughts on Snuggling with Your Loved One

When people consider the benefits of snuggling, they only think of their partner. However, to have that surge of hormones from your body can happen when you embrace your child or anyone. Even rubbing your shoulders can cause this chemical response if you’re desperate and stressed.

Why do you think pet owners are less stressed than other folks? It’s because of the constant embrace and the release of these hormones. Those warm feelings of being connected and having some touch is what many people are missing in their life. So, even if you don’t have a partner or an animal, you can find ways to stimulate your feel-good system to help your overall well-being.

The old saying that an apple a day will keep the doctor away might be accurate, but what if you found something that works even better than fruit? Snuggling up to your partner or someone you love can undoubtedly have many benefits that one cannot ignore.

12 Things That Prove Why Optimism Is So Important in Life

Are you an optimistic person, or do you tend to be more pessimistic? Since the dawn of time, music and poetry have discussed the benefits of being a positive person. Scientists have discovered that optimism and living on the sunny side of life can significantly impact things like your longevity on this earth and the strength of your social connections.

Folks like surrounding themselves with positive people because it makes them feel better. No one wants to be around someone who constantly whines and complains, as they’re like a damp blanket thrown across a fire. Do you know a person who’s always negative and has a dark cloud of sadness that follows them wherever they go?

Why should you strive to be positive, and how can this benefit you in life? What advantages are being fueled by optimism rather than suffocated by negativity?

Ten Reasons Why Optimism Is So Important in Life

It’s effortless to mope and be upset about the things life has thrown your way. However, it takes a strong person to rise in the face of adversity and be happy anyway.

Being positive makes you a better person, and having an optimistic outlook means that getting out of bed tomorrow won’t seem like an arduous task. Here are reasons that prove why being optimistic is best for you and those around you.

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1. Optimism Means You’ll Have a Better Mindset

You must develop a positive mentality, as your mind controls your entire body. It would help to have the proper mental position to keep things functioning normally. You can achieve so much more than you ever thought possible with an optimistic mindset.

Remember the old storybook where the little engine said, “I think I can, I think I can?” The world is your oyster when your mind is set on success and good things. However, when you are constantly thinking about negative things, it can cripple you emotionally.

2. It Benefits Both Your Mind and Body

Your words are powerful, and science has discovered that optimistic people will live longer than negative ones. The Today Show referenced a study conducted by Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, and they found that people who live to be 85 years old and beyond do so by being positive. Additionally, they found that your demeanor is 25 percent dictated by genetics.

3. You’ll Have Better Social Networks When You Exude Optimism

Folks find that being around individuals who think their glass is half-full is much easier than those who are constantly negative. When you’re positive, you tend to have more friends and manage those relationships much more manageable. These bonds can impact your social life in both professional and personal settings.

Additionally, your positive or negative attitude can directly impact your health. There are many advantages to being a positive person, and if you’re born with an optimistic spirit, consider yourself lucky.

4. Optimism Helps You to Overcome Setbacks

There will be many setbacks in your life’s journey, but it’s not how many times you fall that matters. People are watching you and rooting for you, and when you exude positivity, you can get back up no matter how many times you stumble. You’re a survivor and can overcome almost anything.

5. Better Opportunities Will Come Your Way

The Universe rewards folks who have a good outlook on life. If you had to fill a customer service position, would you want to give it to a bubbly person who has a good perspective, or would you provide it to a sour person who barely cracks a smile?

Better opportunities will come your way because positivity is attractive. Your outlook can have blessings come to you that you never dreamed possible when you have the right attitude.

6. You’ll Be Your Best Self

Since you’re here on earth and trying to do what’s right, why not be the best version of yourself? Can you be your best self when you’re full of positivity?

If you live every day in doom and gloom, you’ll have mental health issues like depression and anxiety. You can help change your path by choosing optimism.

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7. Optimism Allows You to Be More Solution Focused

An endearing characteristic of a positive person is that they desire to fix problems that come their way. They are solution-driven rather than falling to pieces at the first sign of trouble. They use their solution-based thinking to find creative resolutions, making them proactive. No wonder these folks are happier, as they don’t sweat the small stuff.

8. You Won’t Be Afraid of Failure

You want that ball to have plenty of bounce when you play basketball. A ball that’s half-flat will fall and stay down. However, the one pumped full of air will spring back and dance all over the court.

When you view the world with optimism, you won’t be afraid of failure as you know you will “bounce back.” No one likes a flat basketball, nor will they like a person so weighed down with pessimism. Positivity is the spring in your step that will keep you dancing and enjoying life.

9. Most are Future Orientated Thinkers

According to Science Direct, the Recency Effect describes people who tend to remember the most current events in their life. For instance, if you’ve just had a job loss and a turn of bad events, the person controlled by this effect will expect the bad luck to continue.

However, when you’re optimistic, you realize that you must look at the big picture rather than getting caught up in all the small details. Optimism tells you to keep moving forward, and you know that you can’t become stalled just because of a bit of setback.

10. You’ll Be One of the Great Communicators

Communication skills are essential in both your personal and professional lives. When you adopt an optimistic outlook, you have no issue communicating and sharing your desires with others.

You can always find something to talk about, and you make it easy to get to know you. People will find you endearing because your life is an open book, and you’re also eager to hear their story.

11. You’ll Learn to Use the Language of Motivation

Did you know that a language called motivation is a gift that leaders possess? You’ve likely had many bosses in your day, and the ones that know how to motivate you will always be the ones that stick out in your mind. In modern history, Sir Winston Churchill was a person who spoke this language.

He was tough as nails but also known as one of the best leaders ever. Why do his leadership skills stand out from the rest? It’s because of his great optimism. Remember when the British were losing badly during the war, he motivated his people and turned them around. Soon, they saw the same vision he had for the future of his country and were able to win.

Yes, all odds were against him, but his positivity helped him conquer the enemy. In his mind surrendering to the Germans was not going to happen, so he used his powerful influence to motivate the people. You’re able to move mountains when you think positively. People will be drawn to your positive nature and will believe in you.

12. Your Behaviors Are Infectious to Others When You Display Optimism

Happiness is contagious. Have you ever been in a dark room and opened the blinds to let the sunshine inside? As soon as the first slat was twisted open, the light would flood the room enveloping every surface. The same thing happens with optimism.

When you go into an atmosphere of depression and darkness, you can’t help but be a bright light of inspiration for others. Positivity is infectious, and you can spread it around.

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Final Thoughts on Why Optimism Is So Important

Someone who has optimism is always hopeful and never defeated. These folks tend to be better in all aspects of their lives, including their careers, relationships, and personal. They have learned to keep stress and drama away using the power of positivity.

They are well-equipped to deal with issues when challenging situations arise because they have the right mindset. While it’s easy to get caught up in all the drama of the day, they tend to focus on the big picture rather than the minor inconveniences that pop up. They’ve learned to always search for a positive in a negative situation, and their health shows it.

It’s no wonder that studies show that those who live on the sunny side of life tend to have greater longevity. What can you do to become a more positive person, and how can it improve your quality of life?

6 Positive Relationship Habits That Make Couples Last

You want your relationship to last and build a secure, healthy, and happy partnership. You want your partner to be in it for the long run with you. But that’s easier said than done, especially in today’s dating scene. People break up all the time, and the chances are that you’ve seen your fair share of relationships that met their eventual end.

So, what’s the secret of those long-lasting couples that have been together for a decade and still seem so happy? Why does it look like some relationships never leave the honeymoon phase? What determines such longevity? There are many, but let’s start with just a few! Here are six positive relationship habits that make couples last.

Relationship Habit #1 – Expressing Regular Appreciation

The longer a relationship lasts, the less the people in it tend to remember to express their appreciation for each other. There’s no malice behind this trend – people assume that their partners know they love and appreciate them. Or they get so used to their partner’s actions that they forget to stop and truly soak in the love they receive.

The flippant, casual nature of how appreciation expressions decrease over time makes this so deadly for relationships. Research has shown that small gestures and expressions of thankfulness and appreciation for your partner can significantly boost relationship satisfaction.

All you need to do is keep noticing what your partner does and commenting positively on those things! Just make sure you’re being honest and genuine – people can tell when you’re faking something like that.

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You can try doing these things:

  • Thank them for their hard work at home and in their career
  • Express the things you love about them in terms of their qualities and strengths
  • Tell them when they impress you
  • Support them when they’re going through something difficult and express your admiration for their perseverance, strength, and capabilities
  • Compliment them on their appearance regularly
  • Write little notes to each other
  • Get each other small but thoughtful gifts

Relationship Habit #2 – Doing Chores Together

There’s nothing that kills a relationship’s spark faster than feeling like a housekeeper, servant, or parent to your partner. Doing chores together and dividing up tasks you both dislike can help to facilitate bonding while diminishing resentment. You’ll also build trust with each other, and it’s a way to spend time together and make unpleasant tasks go by more quickly.

Labor division can indeed mean one partner ends up doing more chores. For example, a stay-at-home, homemaking partner will likely do far more chores than the partner who leaves the house to work. However, there’s a misconception that this division means that the working partner must do zero chores whatsoever. That’s not the reality! Here’s why:

·         Chores Are Normal

Chores are an everyday part of life for all people. Full-time working individuals who are single will do 100% of their chores. In a relationship, those people don’t lose their personal responsibilities. Some of that work can, of course, be delegated to a partner, but they shouldn’t be responsible for 100% of the other party’s chores. This is especially true if the partner at home also has to raise and care for children, which is a whole exhausting ordeal in itself!

·         Full-Time Homemakers Are Always “On”

When you work outdoors, there’s a point where you come home and switch off for the day. Homemakers, however, never get a break. They must keep doing work around the clock, but they’re not getting paid for this 24/7 overtime! It’s reasonable for a homemaker to do all the chores they can while their partner is away at work. But once both parties are at home together, it’s also reasonable for them to split their work so that both people can enjoy a better quality of life.

·         Homemaking Is Not An “Easy” Job

There’s a common misconception that it’s easy to be the stay-at-home partner, but that’s far from the case. There’s a huge chunk of mental load that goes into managing a household, especially if raising children is also involved. The job of being a manager is a full-time, well-paid job outside of the home, and there’s no reason to view it as more accessible or as of less value at home. Treating a partner as if their work is “easy” is also a rather disrespectful way to interact with them!

Relationship Habit #3 – Taking Time To Interact Physically

No, we don’t just mean in the bedroom! If you’ve ever noticed that relationships tend to get less physically affectionate over time, then you know just how sad that change can be. Couples shouldn’t lose their physical affection – that’s how spark dies out and interests change.

Physical touch initiates the release of oxytocin, often called the “love hormone.” This hormone can boost mental health, and it also helps to facilitate bonding. In other words, when you cuddle, hug, or kiss your partner, you’re getting closer together and making each other feel better.

Take time each day to spend time cuddling with each other or simply holding hands. This can make a world of difference. Make sure that this type of time is a priority for both of you, even if it’s just 15 minutes of cuddling in bed before you turn in for the night.

If your relationship isn’t significant on physical touch, that’s okay! Just replace this with whatever love language or expression of affection you both prefer. What matters is that you’re getting the chance to communicate love to each other in meaningful ways.

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Relationship Habit #4 – Spending Time Apart

It seems counterintuitive, but spending time apart is incredibly important for a healthy, long-lasting relationship. Often, people get overly wrapped up in their partners and lose their sense of individuality in the process. This may be due to unhealthy, insecure attachment styles, or it might just be from overenthusiasm and idealism. Either way, it’s not great!

The idea that all couples must be two halves of a whole is a lovely sentiment, but if taken too literally, it has disastrous effects. Partners shouldn’t “complete” each other. They should complement each other but as two whole, complete individuals all on their own. That’s why each person needs to have time and space to be themselves, do their hobbies, and be their people.

The desire to live your whole life consumed by your partner, centering your universe on them, is certainly tempting for some. But that’s not healthy, and it’s only going to lead to codependent and insecurely attached relationships. Things will crash and burn if you don’t let them breathe.

So maintain your own identity for the sake of your relationship. Keep some interests that are just yours, have separate friends, go to places alone, and be independent!

Relationship Habit #5 – Arguing Fairly

Arguments are inevitable in most relationships. They don’t spell doom or gloom – if you do it right, that is! Studies show that expressing anger productively can lead to a happier relationship in the long term. Stronger couples are capable of fighting fairly and effectively. They do this by:

  • Addressing conflict and issues directly instead of avoiding or running away from them
  • Squashing resentment through open communication and positivity to resolve problems
  • Listening to each other and fully considering the point of view of the other party
  • Listening with a focus on understanding instead of responding
  • Avoiding negative forms of communication, such as name-calling, personal attacks, judgment, and defensiveness
  • Taking time to breathe and calm down if things get too heated
  • Respecting each other’s boundaries throughout this entire process
  • Picking battle wisely and choosing when not to pursue an issue
  • Accepting and letting go of battles that are left abandoned so you can both move on

In addition, positive relationships don’t get caught in the idea that you shouldn’t “go to bed angry” with each other. Strong couples know that getting enough sleep reduces irritability and allows people to revisit conflict with a clear head for better resolution. Research supports this, showing that couples who earn more than seven hours of sleep can resolve disputes and have calmer fights.

Relationship Habit #6 – Accepting And Respecting Flaws

The act of trying to change your partner is an act that’s doomed to fail. So is the act of trying only to find the “perfect” partner. These are both concepts that either won’t work or are entirely fictional. No one’s perfect, no matter how much they seem to be at first, and you don’t have the power to change others – only yourself.

Getting lost in the idea that your partner is perfect and without flaw is signing up for disappointment. You’ll see an idealized version of your partner that will be impossible for them to live up to. And, of course, you’ll be utterly blind to any negative behaviors that they do have.

But even worse than that is the act of trying to change your partner’s flaws. If you wouldn’t date your partner as they are, you shouldn’t date them at all. People aren’t projects! A happy, positive relationship will have partners who accept each other’s flaws and don’t try to get rid of them.

It’s worth noting, of course, that some flaws are more problematic than others. Things born from hostile intentions or that negatively affect you need to be discussed and can be grounds for separation.

But for the most part, most flaws are things that each partner must work on individually out of a desire for personal improvement. Partners should respect, accept, and even love those flaws! That’s what makes you both who you are, after all. At the end of the day, date people whose flaws you can happily live with and learn to adore them!

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Final Thoughts On Some Relationship Habits That Make Couples Last

Long-lasting, happy relationships are born from the work and effort of both partners, giving their all to their commitment to harmony and positivity. If that’s something you want for your relationship, start including these six positive relationship habits into your bond with your significant other.

If you and your partner find that you may need some help in your relationship, there’s no shame in seeking marriage counseling! Even the happiest, healthiest relationships can earn benefits from couple’s therapy, so give it a shot if you think it’ll be helpful.

10 Types of Shame to Let Go Immediately

Have you ever dreaded looking in the mirror to face yourself? Maybe it’s because you’ve come to believe false things about yourself. These types of shame can negatively impact your life, and you do not see the true beauty within you.

It’s common for people to use the words shame and guilt interchangeably. While they both include negative thought patterns, they are different emotions. Both can be detrimental to your entire well-being.

Guilt is a negative emotion you feel in response to something specific you’ve done. Consequently, shame is confusing, as it’s a negative emotion that encompasses your whole self. If you’ve purposely done something to hurt someone, you should feel guilty enough to make it right. In this aspect, guilt can create a positive outcome.

However, shame is usually unwarranted and does nothing to benefit you. It’s a bit confusing until you understand both terms and how they can impact your life.

In an article published by Psychology Today, Dr. Shahram Heshmat explains some of the components of shame. He states shame is an overwhelming feeling that you’ve failed to live up to standards. Shame involves self-awareness, self-blame, personality traits, standards, and self-esteem.

Ten Types of Shame to Free Yourself From

It’s understandable to lump shame into one exclusive category. However, different kinds involve everyday human experiences. Here are ten types of shame and why you should let go of them immediately.

types of shame

1. Body Image Shame

Thanks to the media and Hollywood, generations of children grew up with a negative body image. According to an article by Do Something, at least 91 percent of American women are unhappy with their bodies. According to the report, approximately twenty percent of men say they would have cosmetic surgery if they could afford it.

This prevailing emotion is one of the most severe types of shame. The same article explains that only five percent of women in America have what the media calls a “perfect” body. A negative body image can destroy your self-esteem and make you hate yourself.

If you cringe each time you look in the mirror, you’re probably experiencing this cruel shame. It’s the basis for teens’ and adults’ weight shaming and eating disorders. Body image shame refuses to allow you to celebrate your beautiful individuality.

2. Health Issues Shame

Being ashamed of your health and physical limitations also creates a toxic self-image. Maybe you have a developmental disability or cope with a debilitating condition. It may alter your appearance or limit what you can do every day.

Do you struggle with shame because of a condition brought on by your past lifestyle? Even if it was, the unfounded guilt isn’t helping you now. These types of shame do nothing but make the issue worse.

One condition that’s especially prone to such shame is mental health issues. Since society has stigmatized mental illness for so long, the unfair guilt lingers. Even in the 21st century, many people are hesitant to get help for a mental condition because of the implications and stigma.

3. Cultural or Ethnic Shame

It’s a beautiful world that thrives in diverse things, including people. Wouldn’t it be a dull existence if everyone was exactly alike? Yet many folks are ashamed of their rich ethnic and cultural heritage.

4. Gender Shame

Gender shame is another type created by society over thousands of years. The dominance of many male-controlled institutions has suppressed women, but it’s often made gender shame for them.

Many people battle gender shame because of hurtful stereotypes and prejudice—no wonder those free of this self-condemnation highlight their pride. Self-respect in who you are can turn your painful feelings into confidence, regardless of your gender attraction.

5. Age Shame

There is a high level of elder respect in most Asian countries. It is a tenant of Confucianism that has lasted for centuries. Types of shame like ageism would seem foreign in the East but not so much in the Western world.

Americans and the media in the West idolize youth and vitality. Those who are middle-aged flock to plastic surgeons, beauticians, and stylists as their last hope for the fountain of youth. According to an article published by AARP, age discrimination in the workforce remains a severe problem.

6. Financial or Social Status Shame

Ever since humans created the concept of wealth, there’s been a noticeable rift between the “haves” and “have nots.” Throughout the ages, money was power, and those who had it ruled the poor. “Keeping up with the Joneses” has created a type of shame steeped in envy and discontent in America.

You probably won’t hear many people say they are happy with their financial situation. If you aren’t, you’re measuring your self-worth by your bank account. You may feel shame and guilt that you’re not in the luxurious circles you’ve longed to be.

7. Career Shame

Some types of shame, such as financial and career, go hand in hand. It’s easy to be frustrated when working a dead-end job and wanting a high-paying career. There’s just as much dignity in sweeping floors for an honest living as in being CEO.

Being ashamed of your career may create negativity in your workplace. Plus, it may hinder you from seeking to better yourself. At some point, you realize that you work to provide for yourself and your family, and your job doesn’t define you.

8. Productivity Shame

Do you have a healthy balance between work and leisure, or do you insist on working all the time? Some people compare their self-worth to how productive they are each day. They feel guilty when they take a well-deserved break or vacation because they should be working.

Of course, you should be productive and have pride in a job well done. However, productivity shame only makes you lose precious time with your loved ones. Nobody ever wished they’d been in the office more from their death beds.

types of shame

9. Grief or Trauma Shame

Although it goes against reason, many people feel guilty after a traumatic experience. A PTSD-related condition called survivor’s guilt is the crushing blame that people often experience after surviving a disaster when others don’t.

Those who survive predator attacks may also battle unfounded guilt as if they provoked the abuse or aggression. It’s a type of shame that makes you contemplate and loath your life. It won’t allow you to start the process of healing.

Constantly reliving the trauma and holding guilt keeps you in the victim’s position. However, realizing the uselessness of such shame empowers you to become a survivor. It’s all how you perceive yourself and to allow the guilt to continue or not.

10. Parenting Shame

The parenting portrayed in family sitcoms of yesteryear isn’t based on reality. During a half-hour show, cheerful dad reads the paper while mom serves dinner dressed in heels and pearls. If the playful children have any conflict, it’s usually resolved by the end of the program.

You’re still human, even if you’re a parent. No matter how much you love your kids, you’ll make mistakes. Parenting shame creates unrealistic expectations that demand perfect sitcom parents and children.

How to Get Rid of  Those Ten Types Shame

Building up shame in your heart didn’t happen overnight, nor will your healing. However, you can take positive steps to get the process going in the right direction. These are steps to take to release those uncomfortable emotions.

1. Identify Your Types of Shame

What are the traumatic events or situations trigger your shame, and what are the thought processes behind it? Once you recognize what’s caused your shameful feelings, you can start the healing process.

2. Take Responsibility for Your  Types of Shame

You can’t heal and move on from unnecessary shame by feeling guilty. Own these feelings and consider them a challenge. Discover how destructive they can be and any life lessons you can learn from them.

3. Release Your Shame

Once you’ve identified your shame and taken responsibility for it, you can let it go. If it helps, express your intentions and release them compassionately into the Universe. You can also remove the shame by recording your thoughts in a journal or talking to a trusted friend.

4. Enjoy a Fresh Start After Your Release Any Types of Shame

Reusing your painful feelings into the Universe neutralizes them, and you can finally breathe in peace. Now, it’s time to reprogram your mind if old thought patterns return. Instead of reacting with shame, learn to be compassionate with yourself and let them go.

types of shame

Final Thoughts on Identifying the Common Types of Shame So You Can Set Yourself Free

You deserve a satisfying life filled with love, adventure, and self-appreciation. Shame does nothing but tear you down and stand in your way of realizing these goals. When you acknowledge your guilt and its negative impact, you can start to heal and love yourself back to life.

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