Counselors Explain How to Beat A Rough Patch in Your Relationship

February 18, 2024 by Power of Positivity

Whether you’ve been dating someone for a few weeks or have been in a committed relationship for years, it takes lots of work. No matter how much you love each other, there will be times that you feel like walking away. It doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed just because you’ve hit a rough patch.

Perhaps you’ve heard the old saying that the good thing about arguing with your mate is making up later. Let’s face it, disagreements and sometimes hot arguments are inevitable when two individual mindsets are together. However, it’s how you both handle the clash of opinions that makes the difference between a healthy relationship and a toxic one.

There may come a time when things become stagnant between you and your significant other. It may be a rough patch where you can’t identify what caused it. These periodic slumps may seem to last forever, and you may be sure you and your lover are through. What can you do to get your relationship out of the ditch and back on course?

Ways To Get Through A Rough Patch

If you and your mate believe in yourselves and know in your hearts you’re meant to be, don’t give up. Every couple has their battles to conquer, and this is just one of the trials of your relationship. Here are some helpful hints to consider when you and your lover are going through a difficult time.

1. Identify the Culprit

We all have emotional triggers that can bring out the worst in us. After you and your significant other have been together for a while, you’ll understand. Both of you will know what “buttons” not to push to make the other person angry.

When you’re in love with each other, you develop a lover’s intuition that instinctively tells you when your relationship is in trouble. Have you been a little short with each other lately? Maybe it seems that your person gets flustered with your very presence.

It’s difficult not to take a rift in your relationship personally. If you’ve noticed that you’re not getting along, try to look past the emotional part to see the real culprit. According to a study published by the Clinical Psychology Review, stress can have a negative impact on the satisfaction and longevity of your relationship.

Consider the stress that you and your partner are experiencing. Chronic stress can make you feel cross and can magnify the smallest issues. What are some other outside forces that are bombarding your emotional triggers? These are things that you and your lover need to resolve.

2. Communication is Key

The root word of relationship is “relate.” How can two people have a relationship unless they relate by communication? An article published by Couple Family Psychology Journal agrees, stating lack of communication as one of the top reasons that couples divorce. Even if you’re not married, a lack of communication is bound to cause rifts.

It’s a two-way street that means that you listen to each other as well as talk. Do you both practice active listening by using open body language, not interrupting, mirroring the other’s emotions, and restating? Couples may have issues just because they aren’t listening to each other.

3. Be Honest with Your Partner

Are you and your significant other honest with each other when you communicate? Being genuine in the conversation doesn’t mean being rude or cruel. However, there are times in a rough patch that you must be forth-telling, even if the subject is uncomfortable.

Perhaps one of you is holding back on your feelings, afraid of how the other will react. For example, what if you settled on working an outside job when you’d always dreamed of working from home? Pent-up feelings can fester into resentment and can sabotage your love relationship.

If you’ve noticed some friction, maybe it’s time you both had a heart-to-heart talk and brought everything out into the open. You may have thought your mate was angry with you, only to discover they were unhappy with a past decision. Remember that a couple should feel safe enough to voice their opinions without judgment or repercussions.

4. Always Fight Fair

Of course, this has nothing to do with a physical fight. As a couple, you will lock horns countless times over differing opinions. It’s also not unusual for the disagreement to turn into a shouting match and a little time apart. Such lovers’ quarrels are normal, but they are expected, as long as each is true to their feelings.

However, couples have lines that should never be crossed, regardless of the argument. A relationship can turn toxic quickly if you fight more than you laugh. It’s especially concerning when you’re both screaming or slamming doors.

While nobody is above a stray expletive in the heat of the moment, verbal abuse is never okay. A person who loves you shouldn’t be calling you names, yelling in your face, or emotionally intimidating you. Such behavior is toxic and can’t be tolerated, especially if it escalates to physical violence.

When you and your person are hashing it out, try the old method of counting to ten. If you feel like you can’t express your feelings without screaming or bringing up past transgressions, take a time out. Remember that you can’t “unsay” words, so think before you speak or say nothing at all.

5. Think About the Good Things

It’s not easy to be positive when you and your lover are having a rough patch. If you’ve been quarreling for a while and not speaking to each other, all kinds of negativity can overtake you. Keep in mind that negativity attracts the same and can make your situation worse.

While you are taking some time alone and reflecting on the kinks in your relationship, ask yourself a few questions.

•What attracted you to your partner in the first place?

•What are some of the beautiful strengths you love about them?

•Do you have some favorite memories as a couple?

Bringing positivity into the mix can help you have more clarity. In a healthy relationship, the good should always outweigh the bad. A study published by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that optimists and their partners indicated great satisfaction in their relationship.

6. Spend Quality Time Together

If you’re experiencing a rough patch in your relationship, perhaps it’s because you’re not spending enough time together. Yes, it isn’t easy to juggle responsibilities for your family, career, and others. However, what good is a relationship if you aren’t together?

Most people would probably agree that quality means more than quantity. When was the last time you and your lover went out for a night on the town? Has it been forever since you both cuddled on the sofa and watched a movie?

Do you remember when you laid in each other’s arms at night for some quiet “pillow talk?” Do you and your significant other feel like strangers? If so, then it’s little wonder that your relationship is a bit rocky.

Perhaps you’ve become so disconnected that neither partner realizes that you’re drifting apart. You can only know these things if you communicate and spend quality time together. One of the best ways to reconnect is to plan date nights.

Make a loving pact that you both will have dinner, a movie, or even a “night in” once a week. Cultivating your relationship is just as important as anything else on your calendar, if not more so.

7. Leaning on Love

During the rough patches in your relationship, love can be a powerful tool for healing. When you and your person love each other, it makes going the extra mile worth it. While some transgressions and betrayals can go beyond love’s reach, it can still go a long way.

How often do you tell each other, “I love you?” Is it just a force of habit when you leave for work, or is it coming from your heart? Do you remember the first time you both confessed your love? It’s the one thing that can take you through the tough times.

8. Call for Help

Some relationship troubles go deeper than a little rough patch, especially if infidelity and trust issues are present. If you both love each other and are determined to heal the broken relationship, there’s still hope. What if it’s too difficult for you both to handle?

Don’t be afraid or ashamed to ask for help. Consider talking with your spiritual advisor or another trusted friend. Be especially careful about airing your dirty laundry to relatives from either side. While they may be trustworthy and sympathetic, it can be a slippery slope.

You may also consider couples counseling. Your mental healthcare provider can help you find the right counselor for you and your mate. Everything is confidential, and the counselor can offer you tools that may improve your relationship.

Final Thoughts on a Rough Patch in Your Relationship

You needn’t throw in the towel just because you and your lover are having some difficulties. The solution lies within your love and determination to remain a couple. Once you’re over the rough patch, you’ll have the experience for ones that pop up in the future.

25 Empathy Phrases to Be More Supportive

February 18, 2024 by Kristen Butler

Here’s how you can be more empathetic to those who need comforting.

Digital connections are fast replacing face-to-face interactions. As a result, the art of empathy has never been more crucial. Empathy, the capacity to understand the feelings of another, is a cornerstone of strong, supportive relationships. Whether you’re comforting a friend, offering support to a colleague, or just trying to be more present in your daily interactions, knowing the right things to say can make all the difference.

This article will explore 25 empathy phrases to help you show even more kindness in your relationships.

Understanding Empathy: More Than Just Words

Before diving into the phrases, it’s important to understand that empathy is more than just saying the right thing. It’s bigger than comforting someone (although that’s part of it). Instead, it is all about genuinely trying to understand and absorb what another person is going through. This involves active listening, being present, and showing that you care through your actions and words.

25 Empathy Phrases That Improve Your Communication Skills

Try these phrases – or your adaptations – the next time you want to be supportive of someone.

1 – “I hear you.”

This simple phrase is incredibly powerful. It’s not just about auditory listening; it’s an acknowledgment that you’re fully engaged and attentive to the speaker’s feelings and thoughts.

When you say, “I hear you,” you’re telling the other person that their voice is important and their words are being absorbed. It also tells them you’re not just waiting for your speech.

This phrase cuts through the noise of everyday distractions and focuses squarely on the person before you. It signals that their perspective is being considered and respected. As a result, it creates a space of trust and openness in the conversation.

2 – “This must be really tough for you.”

By saying this, you are stepping into the other person’s shoes and acknowledging the weight of their experience. This phrase does more than recognize that someone is going through a difficult time. Instead, it conveys a deeper understanding of the emotional burden they may be carrying.

It’s a verbal nod to the complexity of their feelings, whether it’s sadness, frustration, or overwhelm. This empathy doesn’t try to minimize their struggle or offer quick fixes. But instead, it stands beside them in their moment of hardship, offering solidarity and compassion.

3 – “I’m here for you.”

This phrase is a beacon of support and reliability. It goes beyond mere words. Rather, it promises emotional availability and a commitment to be present, whatever the circumstances. When you say, “I’m here for you,” you’re offering a kind of emotional anchorage, a stable point amid someone’s turmoil.

It’s a reassurance that they don’t have to face their challenges alone and that you’re willing to share in their journey, providing comfort and understanding along the way. This phrase can be a potent reminder of the strength found in human connection.

4 – “How can I support you right now?”

This question is a proactive and considerate way to offer assistance. It’s not assuming or imposing what you think the person needs; instead, it’s giving them the control and choice to voice their needs.

This question respects the individuality of their experience and recognizes that support can take many forms. It could be a listening ear or a helping hand. It might also mean being there in silence. By asking this, you’re showing a readiness to act in the way that they find most helpful. That can be enormously comforting and empowering for the person receiving your support.

5 – “That sounds really challenging.”

With this phrase, you acknowledge the difficulty of the situation without underplaying or exaggerating it. It’s an empathetic recognition that their struggle is real and significant.

This statement validates their feelings without judgment and shows that you’re attuned to the complexity of their situation. It’s saying, “I see the hurdles you’re facing, and I understand that it’s not easy.”

This kind of acknowledgment can be a powerful form of emotional validation. In fact, it helps the person feel heard and understood in a world that often feels indifferent to individual struggles.

6 – “I can’t imagine how that feels, but I’m here to help.”

This phrase genuinely acknowledges the unique and overwhelming nature of someone else’s experience. By admitting that you can’t fully grasp what they’re going through, you’re showing humility and respect for the depth of their situation. It’s a way of saying that although their pain might be beyond your comprehension, your support isn’t.

This phrase signals your readiness to be there for them, offering a hand to hold or a shoulder to lean on. It’s about providing comfort and assistance in any way you can. You acknowledge the limits of your understanding but still offer up empathy or willingness to help.

7 – “You’re not alone in this.”

These words can be a lifeline in times of isolation and despair. By reminding someone they have support, you’re helping to lift the weight of solitude that often accompanies difficult experiences.

This phrase reassures them that they have an ally, a confidant, a friend in their corner. It’s a reminder of the shared human experience and the connections that bind us, providing a sense of community and solidarity. Knowing that they have a person who cares can significantly impact someone’s ability to navigate challenging times.

8 – “I’m sorry you’re going through this.”

This simple expression of sympathy is a powerful way to connect with someone’s suffering. It’s a verbal embrace, a way of showing compassion and concern. When you say this, you’re acknowledging their pain and sharing it, even for a moment.

This empathy doesn’t try to fix the problem or offer solutions. Instead, it’s about recognizing the struggle and showing that you care. It’s a heart-to-heart message that brings warmth and solace to someone going through a hard time.

9 – “Your feelings are valid.”

In a world where people are often quick to judge or dismiss emotions, affirming the validity of someone’s feelings is immensely important. This phrase tells the person that whatever they’re feeling – anger, sadness, frustration, or fear – is real and deserves acknowledgment.

It’s an act of acceptance. It offers them a safe space to express their emotions without fear of being belittled or misunderstood. Validating someone’s emotions can be crucial in helping them process and work through their feelings in a healthy, constructive way.

10 – “Take all the time you need.”

Patience is a gift, especially when someone is navigating the complexities of their emotions or a difficult situation. This phrase communicates that you respect their process and are willing to give them the space and time they need to heal, reflect, or be.

It’s an assurance that you’re not rushing them or imposing your timeline on their experience. By saying this, you’re offering them the freedom to move at their own pace. The reassurance can be incredibly empowering and healing. It’s a way of showing unobtrusive yet deeply considerate support, allowing them to take the journey at the right pace.

11 – “Would you like to talk about it?”

This question opens a door, offering a safe and non-judgmental space for someone to share their thoughts and feelings. It’s a gentle invitation that puts the control in the hands of the other person, allowing them to decide if they’re ready to open up.

This phrase shows you’re willing to talk and listen – a key component of support. It’s about allowing them to express themselves and unburden their heart if they choose to. Sometimes, just knowing someone is willing to listen can be incredibly comforting and significantly affect how someone copes with their situation.

12 – “I’m always just a phone call away.”

Physical presence isn’t always possible in busy lives, but this phrase bridges that gap. It’s reassuring that you’re accessible and willing to provide support, even if you can’t be there in person.

This promise of availability can be a source of great comfort to someone who might feel alone. It also shows that someone cares, ready to listen or help at a moment’s notice. It’s a reminder that support and connection transcend physical distances and that they have someone in their life who’s ready to be there for them, no matter where they are.

13 – “It’s okay to feel this way.”

This affirmation is a powerful antidote to the societal stigma surrounding strong emotions. By normalizing their feelings, you’re helping dismantle the notion that there’s a ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way to feel in any situation. This phrase acknowledges the authenticity of their emotions and reinforces that it’s natural to have a strong emotional response to life’s challenges.

It’s a form of validation that can provide immense relief to someone feeling guilty or ashamed of their emotional state. Hearing that it’s okay to feel as they do can be a crucial step in their emotional acceptance and healing journey.

14 – “I believe in you.”

These words can be a powerful motivator, especially during self-doubt or uncertainty. Expressing your belief in someone’s abilities reinforces their self-worth and can inspire them to tap into their inner strength and resilience.

This empathy phrase shows that you see their potential and capabilities, even if they struggle to see it themselves. It’s a verbal vote of confidence that can help lift their spirits and give them the courage to face and overcome their challenges. Knowing that someone else believes in them can be the push they need to persevere in moments of difficulty.

15 – “You’re so strong, and I admire that.”

Recognizing someone’s strength – especially when they might feel anything but strong – can be incredibly empowering. This phrase acknowledges their challenges and celebrates their resilience and fortitude in dealing with them.

It’s a form of admiration that can help bolster their self-esteem and encourage them to continue being strong. You highlight their ability to cope with tough times by respecting their strength. You also help them see themselves through a lens of strength and resilience. This recognition can provide great comfort and motivation during difficult periods.

16 – “Let’s figure this out together.”

This phrase is more than just an offer of help; it’s an offer of partnership. It shows that you’re willing to share the load, stand beside the person in their struggle, and work with them towards a solution. It’s a message of solidarity that tells them they don’t have to face their problems alone.

This collaborative approach can be incredibly empowering, transforming a challenging situation into an opportunity for joint problem-solving. It reduces the overwhelming feeling of having to tackle everything by oneself, fostering a sense of teamwork and mutual support.

17 – “I appreciate you sharing this with me.”

When you acknowledge the courage it takes for someone to open up, you’re honoring their trust and vulnerability. This empathy phrase makes the other person feel seen and respected for their willingness to share something personal or difficult.

It’s an affirmation that their experiences and feelings are important and that you value the openness of the conversation. This reassurance can strengthen the bond of trust and deepen the connection between you and the person sharing, making them feel safer and more supported in future interactions.

18 – “You’ve been handling this so well.”

In adversity, it’s easy for people to overlook their strength and resilience. By pointing out how well they’ve managed their situation, you’re helping them see their capabilities and strengths. This recognition can be a significant morale booster, providing a sense of accomplishment and pride.

It’s a way of reflecting on their strength. It also reminds them of their ability to cope effectively, even under difficult circumstances. This positive reinforcement can be incredibly motivating and uplifting.

19 – “It’s not easy, but I know you can get through this.”

Offering encouragement while acknowledging the difficulty of the situation strikes a balance between realism and optimism. This phrase doesn’t downplay challenges but emphasizes your belief in their ability to overcome them.

It’s a message of hope and confidence, suggesting that despite the hardships, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Hearing these words can be a source of comfort and inspiration, especially when someone is doubting their strength or ability to cope.

20 – “Let’s find a solution together.”

This phrase extends an offer of collaboration and support, making the problem-solving process a joint effort. It’s an approach that can alleviate feelings of isolation and overwhelm in the person facing the challenge.

Working together to find a solution provides practical help and emotional support, creating a sense of unity and shared purpose. It implies that their burden is your burden, too. It also reassures them you are committed to helping them find a way through their difficulties. This collaborative spirit can make the journey toward a solution more manageable and less daunting.

21 – “Your experience is important.”

This phrase is a powerful affirmation of the individual’s unique journey and struggles. By validating the significance of their experiences, you’re acknowledging that what they’re going through matters and deserves attention. It’s a way of saying that their story is worth hearing and that their feelings are a crucial part of their reality.

This recognition can help individuals feel seen and understood and encourage them to value their experiences and perspectives more deeply. It’s a statement that can instill a sense of dignity and self-worth, particularly when they might feel overlooked or invalidated.

22 – “I’m proud of how you’re managing this.”

When you express pride in how someone is handling a situation, you’re not just acknowledging their struggle; you’re celebrating their resilience and resourcefulness in the face of adversity. This expression of pride can be a tremendous source of encouragement.

It can boost one’s confidence and reinforce the effectiveness of their coping strategies. Hearing that someone is proud of them can provide a sense of accomplishment and motivation, inspiring them to continue facing their challenges with strength and determination.

23 – “You have the strength to get through this.”

This phrase is a reminder of the person’s inner resilience and capability. It’s a way of bolstering their confidence and empowering them to draw on their strengths. Sometimes, people can lose sight of their power and resilience during challenging circumstances.

By reminding them of their strength, you’re helping to reignite their belief in themselves. This encouragement can catalyze resilience, sparking a renewed sense of hope and the determination to persevere.

24 – “I’m here to listen whenever you need.”

This promise of ongoing support is incredibly valuable. It’s not just about being available now; it’s about offering sustained, reliable support. Reiterating your readiness to listen anytime underscores your commitment to being there for them, which can be incredibly comforting.

It lets the person know they have a dependable source of support and a safe space to share their thoughts and feelings…but without any judgment. This ongoing availability can be a significant source of solace and strength for someone navigating difficult times.

25 – “We’ll get through this together.”

This phrase embodies the essence of teamwork and shared struggle. It’s a powerful declaration of solidarity, showing that you’re not just a bystander in their challenges but an active participant in overcoming them.

Emphasizing a shared effort highlights that the burden is shared and that the journey toward resolution or healing works both ways. This sense of partnership can greatly alleviate the isolation that often accompanies difficult experiences, fostering a feeling of companionship and mutual support. It’s a reminder that together, challenges can become more manageable and less daunting.

Final Thoughts on Trying These Empathy Phrases When Comforting Others

Remember that empathy is more than just saying the right words. It’s about genuinely comforting someone you care about. It encompasses a supportive tone of voice, the willingness to listen, and your actions to support someone. These phrases are tools to help you express empathy – a skill that will help you become a better communicator. Shine on!

15 Quotes to Heal From Depression After a Breakup

February 17, 2024 by Power of Positivity

After a breakup, you likely experience many unpleasant thoughts and emotions. It causes grieving, even if the relationship ends for a good reason. By exploring these 15 quotes, you can find solace and inspiration to heal from depression after a breakup.

These quotes remind you that you’re not alone and promote healing. The grief process takes time as you overcome what happened and prepare for the future. You might feel depressed but trust that you’ll come through it and find happiness.

While the process is complicated and can contribute to depression, you can heal and overcome the experience. You’ll find happiness after a breakup, and reading quotes can help.

The Power of Quotes

Reading inspirational quotes after a breakup promotes emotional healing, reminding you that you can persevere and overcome the pain. The words of wisdom can provide support, encouragement, and guidance for moving forward or remind you that you’re not alone in the experience.

Quotes can also help you put words to your feelings, allowing you to discuss them with someone you trust. They also encourage self-reflection so you can learn from your mistakes, grow, and boost your well-being.

Healing Quotes After a Breakup About Acceptance and Moving On

It’s sometimes hard to accept a breakup and focus on letting go. These acceptance quotes can help with moving on as they encourage you to heal and focus on the future. You’ll be less likely to dwell on the situation and more likely to consider what you can do for yourself moving forward.

1 – Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.” – Deborah Reber

Letting go of someone doesn’t make you suddenly not care about that person anymore. Even if you’re the one who ended the relationship, you likely still care about them on some level. Instead, it helps you recognize that you can only control yourself so you can focus on that rather than letting your ex affect your thoughts and well-being.

“Take all the time you need to heal emotionally. Moving on doesn’t take a day, it takes lots of little steps to be able to break free of your broken self.” – Tere Arigo

Accepting your breakup is part of healing and can help you start the journey. It takes a while and involves hardship but sets you free. Remember this acceptance quote so you can focus on taking small steps to move forward.

3 – “Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.” – Ann Landers

Moving on is sometimes the best way to show strength because it requires prioritizing yourself and your well-being. When you recognize when it’s time to accept the situation and let go, you can focus on overcoming depression after a breakup.

Quotes About Personal Growth and Self-Discovery

Personal growth quotes after a breakup promote self-discovery. As you learn about yourself, you can embrace the change and build inner strength, helping you overcome depression and find new meaning in life.

4 – “The challenge is… learning to be my own best friend instead of my own worst critic.” – Kristen Butler

Grant permission to yourself to fall in love again–with yourself. Self-love is not vain or narcissistic. It builds your self-esteem. After a breakup, learning to be comfortable in your own space without your partner is critical. Don’t blame or criticize yourself for the breakup, instead take the time to soothe your pain–by being your own best friend.

5 – “Sometimes we must undergo hardships, breakups, and narcissistic wounds, which shatter the flattering image that we had of ourselves, in order to discover two truths: that we are not who we thought we were; and that the loss of a cherished pleasure is not necessarily the loss of true happiness and well-being.” – Jean-Yves Leloup

Life isn’t always easy, but it helps you discover new things about yourself. You must go through hardship and reflect on when you want to heal from depression after a breakup.

6 – “I think a spiritual journey is not so much a journey of discovery. It’s a journey of recovery. It’s a journey of uncovering your own inner nature. It’s already there.” – Billy Corgan

Everything you are is already inside of you, and you only have to find it to embrace it. Look within for healing so you can experience personal growth.

Quotes About Self-Love and Compassion

Self-love quotes can help you practice self-compassion during the healing process. It will help you prioritize and nurture yourself to recover from depression.

7 – “Respect yourself enough to know you deserve the very best.” – Unknown

This quote reminds you that you deserve the best in your relationship. It promotes self-love and self-compassion as you prioritize yourself despite the hardship you’ve experienced.

8 – “Things to know about life: ‘No’ is a complete sentence. It does not require justification or explanation.” – Unknown

After a breakup, you might experience requests or other things from your ex. However, you can say no without explaining.

Doing so is a form of self-care because it allows you to continue moving on without getting caught up in unnecessary hardship. This quote also reminds you that if you had to justify yourself when you said no, it wasn’t the relationship for you anyway.

9 – “Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.” – Unknown

If your past relationship was one-sided, this quote helps you overcome depression after a breakup. It reminds you that you deserve more than being an option to someone you prioritize. Once you realize it, you can put your energy into nurturing oneself instead of putting it into another person.

Quotes About Resilience and Perseverance After a Breakup

These resilience quotes can promote perseverance as you focus on overcoming obstacles. You’ll experience healing and growth when you stay strong and push through your difficult emotions.

10 – “Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have – life itself.” – Walter Anderson

Perseverance is essential to healing because how you respond to hardship defines your life. You must focus on what you want and keep pushing through to live a fulfilling life.

11 – “You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Overcoming obstacles helps you build strength, courage, and confidence. It requires facing your fears and stepping out of your comfort zone, even when it would be easier to stay where you are.

12 – “You may think you’ll never get over it, but you will.” – Unknown

You might feel like the pain will never end, but this quote reminds you that it will. Keep pushing and hone in on resilience to promote overcoming obstacles during your healing journey. You’ll become stronger, wiser, and feel better about this fresh start.

Quotes About Hope and New Beginnings

Hope quotes can help you get excited about new beginnings and a fresh start. Staying hopeful is one of the best ways to overcome depression and embrace your future with optimism.

13 – “Sometimes the door closes on a relationship, not because we failed but because something bigger than us says this no longer fits our life. So, lock the door, shed a tear, turn around and look for the new door that’s opened. It’s a sign that you’re no longer that person you were, it’s time to change into who you are. It’s going to be okay.” – Lee Goff

This quote reminds you to embrace new beginnings because it means something better is out there for you. You grew as an individual and now require a fresh start to live a fulfilling, happy life.

14 – “Sometimes good things fall apart so that better things can fall together.” – Marilyn Monroe

Remembering that good things are in your future can help you heal from depression and find hope in what’s coming. Trusting in new beginnings allows you to overcome negativity and find joy again.

15 – “Don’t be afraid to start over. It’s a brand new opportunity to rebuild what you truly want.” – Unknown

One of the best ways to heal your depression after a breakup is to embrace the new opportunity. It allows you to reflect on the aspects of your life that could be better and rebuild them how you want. Once you recognize it, you’ll begin feeling better and building a happy life again.

Applying the Wisdom of Quotes to Your Healing Journey After a Breakup

After a breakup, you’ll experience negative feelings, including anger, betrayal, worthlessness, and others. Releasing these feelings and healing from depression can help you with emotional recovery to become optimistic and boost your life satisfaction.

Once you read the quotes, consider the ones that resonate within you. These quotes can help with reflection, allowing you to incorporate inspiration and comfort into your healing process.

Some of the ways you can use quotes as reminders for emotional recovery and personal growth include:

writing them on sticky notes to post in a place you see often
putting them in your journal or planner
saying them aloud to yourself
sharing them with friends or loved ones

Final Thoughts on Reading These Quotes for Healing After a Breakup

The healing power of quotes can help you overcome depression after a breakup. They provide guidance moving forward and remind you that you aren’t alone.

Use these quotes to guide your journey toward emotional recovery and personal growth. Remembering these comforting words for moving on from a breakup can benefit your well-being and help you heal. You’ll gain inspiration for overcoming depression after a breakup, helping you find joy and meaning.

15 Phrases That Worsen Arguments (and What to Say Instead)

February 16, 2024 by Chris Butler

Avoid these words when you argue with a loved one.

Arguments are a natural part of human interactions. But how we handle them what we say while we argue can greatly impact our relationships and mental health. In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to let emotions take over and say things that worsen the situation.

This article explores the impact of words, fifteen phrases that can escalate arguments, alternative expressions to show understanding, and resolution after the argument ends.

Understanding the Impact of Words in Arguments

Before we look into the specific phrases that can worsen arguments, it’s crucial to appreciate words’ profound impact on our interactions. The language we choose during a disagreement holds the power to either bridge gaps or deepen divides. This influence extends far beyond the content of what is said. In fact, it encompasses how we say it, the tone we use, and the context in which the words are spoken. It also encompasses the intent behind them – and how the other party receives them.

The tone of our voice can convey a multitude of emotions. To name just a few:

Anger
Sarcasm
Calm
Compassion
Fear

Each elicits different responses from the listener. Albert Mehrabian’s 55/38/7 Communication Model shows how tone can often communicate more than the actual words used. For instance, a statement made in a harsh tone can seem aggressive, even if the words are neutral.

Context also plays a pivotal role. The same phrase can have altogether different meanings depending on the situation. In a heated argument, a comment might be interpreted as criticism. Conversely, the same comment in a calm discussion could be constructive feedback. That’s why understanding the context and adapting our language is key to effective communication.

Moreover, our intent – or the purpose behind our words – is critical. Are we deliberately trying to hurt or control the other person? Are we attempting to convey frustration? Or do we honestly hope to find a solution? Words spoken with the intent to harm or belittle can cause lasting damage to relationships. On the other hand, words used to understand and resolve can foster stronger bonds and mutual respect.

It’s also important to consider the listener’s perspective. What might seem like a straightforward statement to one person could be received as a deeply hurtful remark by another? That is where emotional intelligence comes into play, allowing us to anticipate and understand how others might interpret our words.

Finally, words we utter while we argue can shape our reality and influence our mindset. The language we use can affect how we perceive a conflict and how we approach its resolution. We can steer conversations towards a positive outcome when choosing more positive and solution-focused words.

Avoid These 15 Phrases During Arguments

Here are some inappropriate, unhelpful things to avoid saying in the heat of the moment:

1 – “You Always Do This”

This phrase is an absolute statement that generalizes a person’s behavior, making them defensive. It shuts down any chance of constructive dialogue.
What to Say Instead: “I’ve noticed this happens often. Can we talk about why?”

2 – “You Never Listen to Me”

Similar to the first phrase, this one also uses absolutes. It implies a total lack of effort or care from the other person.
What to Say Instead: “I feel like I’m not being heard. Can we discuss this?”

3 – “I Don’t Care”

Saying “I don’t care” dismisses the importance of the issue and the other person’s feelings.
What to Say Instead: “I’m finding it hard to connect with this issue. But I really want to understand your perspective.”

4 – “Whatever”

“Whatever” is a dismissive term that shows indifference. It can also be hurtful, invalidating the other person’s input into the discussion.
What to Say Instead: “I need some time to think about this before we continue our conversation.”

5 – “It’s Your Fault”

Blame is a surefire way to escalate an argument. It puts the other person on the defensive and avoids shared responsibility.
What to Say Instead: “Let’s look at how we both contributed to this situation.”

6 – “You’re Overreacting”

This phrase invalidates the other person’s feelings and experiences as you argue about an issue.
What to Say Instead: “Your reaction seems strong; can you help me understand why you feel this way?”

7 – “Calm Down”

Telling someone to calm down often has the opposite effect. It can be perceived as patronizing.
What to Say Instead: “I can see you’re upset. Let’s take a few moments to breathe before we continue.”

8 – “You Don’t Know What You’re Talking About”

This phrase dismisses the other person’s knowledge or feelings on the subject. The person may know about the topic but struggle to express it clearly.
What to Say Instead: “I see this differently. Can you explain your perspective more?”

9 – “This Is Stupid”

Calling the issue or argument stupid is dismissive and disrespectful. It has no way to advance a constructive conversation on the topic.
What to Say Instead: “I’m struggling to see the importance of this issue. Can you help me understand?”

10 – “I’m Done Talking”

Shutting down the conversation doesn’t resolve anything and can leave issues unresolved.
What to Say Instead: “I need a break. Can we revisit this conversation later?”

11 – “You’re Just Like Your [Family Member]”

Comparing someone to a family member in a negative light can be deeply hurtful and unproductive. After the current discussion ends, you will be on the hook for insulting someone the other party loves.
What to Say Instead: “I notice a pattern that concerns me. Can we talk about it?”

12 – “You Should Have Known”

This phrase implies an expectation of mind-reading and is unrealistic.
What to Say Instead: “I wish there had been better communication about this.”

13 – “That’s Crazy”

Labeling someone’s thoughts or feelings as crazy is demeaning. It also lends itself to stigmas or calls into question the other party’s mental health.
What to Say Instead: “That’s surprising to me. Can you explain more?”

14 – “You’re Being Too Sensitive”

This phrase invalidates the person’s feelings and experiences. Moreover, some people are actually more sensitive. They cannot help it; it’s how they’re built.
What to Say Instead: “Your feelings are important. Can you share why this affects you deeply?”

15 – “I Don’t Want to Talk About This Anymore”

Refusing to talk about an issue can leave unresolved feelings. Walking away solves nothing and can make the other person feel abandoned.
What to Say Instead: “I’m finding this conversation challenging. Can we take a break and revisit it?”

Healing the Rift After You Argue

Even when handled with care, arguments can leave a rift in relationships. Healing this rift involves a process of accountability, apologizing, making amends, and moving on healthily. This section explores these steps, supported by evidence on effective relationship repair strategies.

What is accountability?

Accountability is acknowledging your role in the argument. It’s about owning up to your actions and their impact without excuses or deflection. Taking responsibility for one’s actions – owning up to mistakes – is crucial in repairing trust.

Implementing Accountability:

Reflect on your actions and their consequences.
Acknowledge your part in the argument without shifting blame.

The Art of Apologizing

An apology is more than just half-heartedly saying, “I’m sorry.” It demonstrates remorse for your actions and their effects on the other person. An apology is a chance to own up (accountability) and express your regret for the words or actions that led to the heated discussion. It’s also appropriate to apologize for hurtful words you said while arguing.

Giving a Meaningful Apology:

Express remorse genuinely.
Acknowledge the specific harm caused.
Explain your understanding of why your actions were hurtful.

Making Amends

Making amends, when appropriate, is a proactive step towards repairing the relationship. It shows a commitment to change and to do better in the future. Reparative actions can significantly improve relationship satisfaction post-conflict.

Steps to Make Amends

Offer to rectify the situation, if possible.
Discuss ways to prevent the same or similar issues in the future.
Commit to positive changes in behavior.

Moving On Constructively

Moving on from an argument is crucial for the health of the relationship. It involves a conscious decision not to use the argument as a weapon in future disagreements. A report in the American Psychological Association highlights the importance of forgiveness and letting go of grudges for mental health and relationship stability.

Strategies for Moving on:

Agree to leave the argument in the past.
Focus on positive aspects of the relationship.
Engage in constructive communication in the future.

Healing after you argue with someone is a vital, though often challenging, part of any relationship. It requires a combination of accountability, sincere apologies, making amends, and a commitment to move forward positively. These steps, grounded in psychological research, can help mend the rifts caused by arguments, leading to stronger, more resilient relationships.

Final Thoughts on Avoiding the Phrases that Worsen Arguments

Effective communication is key in resolving conflicts. By being mindful of our phrases, we can create a space for understanding and problem-solving. Remember that people who truly care about one another sometimes argue. But it’s not about winning an argument but finding a solution respecting everyone involved. Even the most challenging discussions can lead to positive outcomes with patience and empathy.

12 Behaviors for a More Positive Life

February 16, 2024 by Kristen Butler

A positive life means different things to everyone. When you think of positivity, you are upbeat and see the good even in difficult situations. It means looking for the good in other people. You may struggle with positivity. Perhaps you’re a realist who feels jaded by the world. If that’s the case, here are some ways to increase your positivity. Check out these behaviors that can help you live a more positive life.

What Is a Positive Life?

Having a positive life doesn’t depend upon your wealth, career, or education. Positivity is an attitude of the heart. You choose to be positive. Here is a positive life defined:

It focuses on solutions instead of a problem
It means working to improve yourself
It’s living in the present and not worrying about the future
It means learning from your mistakes
It’s noticing good things in others
It’s not allowing your troubles to define you
It means seeing life as worth living and doing the best you can
It’s choosing to be kind and compassionate even with hard-to-love people
It helps you say “no” when you should

12 Behaviors That Can Help You Live a More Positive Life

1 – Have positive social interactions

When you have positive interactions with people who love and care for you, it boosts your mental health. Healthy relationships and positivity go hand in hand. Having solid friendships affects you physically and mentally. The benefits of positive social interactions include the following:

You trust people
You’ll cooperate with others
You have better self-esteem
You have more empathy for others

Positive social interactions make you feel happier about your life and give you a sense of belonging. One study found that having positive social contact can offset depression more than a phone call. Find ways to be a part of positive social interactions at

Church
Your neighborhood
Sports team
Book club

2 – Seek gratitude for a more positive life

Being grateful can help you feel less stressed. It keeps you going when things are difficult because you’re trying to find even a glimmer of good. Thank the people around you at a restaurant, the grocery store, or school. It may surprise you how you can make someone’s day a little better by showing gratitude to them.

3 – Write down your thoughts

It’s helpful to keep a journal to write down your thoughts. Pour out your heart on paper, and you’ll feel better. Maybe write down things that are especially difficult right now, then look to solve these problems.

4 – Laugh about it

An ancient proverb says A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17:22 (NIV) It seems like the writer of this proverb knew what they were talking about. Studies show that laughter has positive physiological effects for those who engage in it regularly. Laughter lowers anxiety and stress. It causes chemical changes in our body that help increase our pain tolerance and lighten our moods.

There’s a considerable debate about spontaneous laughter versus simulated laughter. Scientists say both types of laughter are just as good. So whether you’re belly laughing about something funny your dog did or chuckling at the funny joke you just heard on the radio, laughter is one behavior to include in your day for a more positive life.

5 – Tell yourself positive things

It’s easy to get burdened by stuff you did or didn’t do. Maybe you feel discouraged because your life hasn’t turned out like you thought it would. It’s easy to beat yourself up about what you should have done. Why not shift your self-talk to something more positive? Focus on solutions to your problems. Tell yourself what’s good about your life. If you’ve made a mistake that you can fix, step out and begin the process of restitution and resolution. Make that phone call or write that email. Today’s a new day, and you can start better time management.

6 – Go for a walk for a positive life

It may sound too simple, but just walking outside can help add positivity to your life. Moving around in the great outdoors improves your mood, decreases stress, and restores your mental fatigue. Exercising in green spaces is like natural medicine. Whether you walk around a park, hike in a nature reserve or enjoy the countryside, you’ll enjoy better health and happiness. Walking or hiking outdoors is a habit to include in your day or week for a more positive life. Other benefits of walking include:

Improves your memory
Helps you sleep better
Boosts your self-confidence
Decreases your anxiety

7 – Get adequate sleep

Scientists continue to be surprised at the importance of a good night’s sleep. Sleep rests your body and mind, but it clears your brain of toxins, distresses you, and restores your body. Of course, life gets busy with work, kids, and other things. Missing even a few hours of sleep may not seem a big deal. Some scientists estimate that approximately 30% of adults in the United States have sleep deficiency. Lack of sleep connects to chronic disease, social problems, lifestyle, and occupational problems. When your biological cycle of sleep is disrupted, you’re at risk for health problems such as these:

Heart disease
Dementia
Metabolism problems
Immune problems
Stress and anxiety

8 – Get a pet

Owning a pet is one way to live a more positive life. Pets give you a lot of joy, a sense of purpose, and lots of love. Petting your dog or cat lowers your blood pressure and lessens your stress. Playing with your pet isn’t just fun. It also causes your brain to release serotonin and dopamine. These chemicals make you feel happier. Your furry friend also forces you to go outside for walks or playtime. A dog is a great way to meet neighbors because everyone wants to pet your buddy. One study found that people experiencing stressful situations recover quickly when they have a pet.

9 – Look for others who lead a positive life

Bad stuff is all around. Just read the news. It’s easy to assume the world is a terrible place. But for your own sake, you need to look for the good. Start in your neighborhood, at work, or your school. Look for the people in your life who make the world a better place–your teachers, pastors, or coaches. Limit the negative influences that affect you, such as

News
Social media sites
Blogs that tear down others
Toxic people

Focus on what’s good. Complaining about all the bad things happening in the world is easy. Why not be part of the positive things going on in the world? Bring positivity into your life. Volunteer at a homeless shelter or a school. Donate your time and energy to a soup kitchen or an animal shelter.

10 – Maintain your values

When you have a solid foundation of values, you’ll be more focused on those things that give your life purpose. Things like faith in God help you make decisions or solve problems. You feel more confident of a direction and are ready to stand up for what you believe. Family values help you choose to work less and spend more time with your kids. You may not deal with as much stress at work because you’re not out to climb the success ladder. Your values influence your thinking, build your self-confidence, and give you a sense of purposefulness in life.

11 – Get creative

Creative people are problem solvers. When you choose to be creative, you’re finding solutions to problems at home, at school, or at work. Creativity causes you to focus your energy and enthusiasm on something. You feel a sense of purpose. You feel accomplished when you solve a problem or create something. It builds your self-confidence and your sense of adventure to find more solutions. Creativity is a behavior that helps you live a more positive life.

12 – Create a more positive life through music

Start listening to music at home, in the car, or at work. Create a playlist of your best songs and listen to these while you work out or wash the dishes. Music lifts your mood and makes you feel happier. You can sing along or dance to boost your heart and mind even more positivity.

Final Thoughts on Living a Positive Life

A positive lifestyle is a choice. It doesn’t hinge on whether you’re rich, got a great job, or have a big house. Being positive comes from the heart. More often than not, the habits that give you a more positive life are free. Things like gratitude, your values, walking outdoors, or getting enough sleep. You make these choices to have a better life with purpose and meaning. Why not try adding these behaviors to your every day and see if you begin to feel like you have a more positive life?

6 Things That Make Smart Men the Most Attractive

February 15, 2024 by Power of Positivity

Intelligence and confidence have long been desirable qualities in a potential partner. A bright and confident person impresses others and inspires admiration and respect. In today’s world, where intelligence is valued more than ever, being smart has become a significant factor in attraction. But what exactly makes smart men so attractive? What qualities set them apart from others?

By answering these questions, we better understand the traits that make smart men irresistible and promote self-confidence in those who possess these qualities. Intelligence is a trait that links to success, creativity, and problem-solving abilities. No wonder it is also a desirable quality in a partner. People are attracted to those who can confidently converse, make well-informed decisions, and exhibit wit and charm.

On the other hand, confidence is equally important in attraction because it conveys a sense of security, self-assurance, and assertiveness. A confident person radiates positivity and can handle challenging situations with ease. Gentlemen who possess both intelligence and confidence, are seen as particularly attractive by many people. They are the guys who can carry a conversation, offer fresh perspectives, and make others feel at ease.

Their intelligence and confidence shine through in their behavior and attitude, making them more desirable as partners. However, intelligence and confidence are not the only qualities that make smart men attractive. Several other factors contribute to their irresistible charm. By highlighting the qualities that make smart men attractive, we promote self-confidence. So, if you are wondering what sets smart men apart, read on to discover the six things that make them irresistible.

NOTE: If you want to know why smart women are the most attractive, be sure to check out our separate article on that topic.

6 Things That Make Smart Men Very Attractive

We’ve established the importance of intelligence in attractiveness, so let’s dive into the six things that make these guys irresistible. These qualities make them stand out, from their sense of humor to their emotional intelligence. So let’s look at these six traits that make smart men very attractive.

1 – Intelligence and Intellectual Curiosity

Intelligence and intellectual curiosity are the first things that come to mind when considering intelligent men. These wonderful qualities are what set them apart from others and make them particularly attractive. However, a smart man’s intelligence is not just about being book-smart. It also includes thinking critically, making informed decisions, and holding engaging conversations. They deeply understand the world, and their knowledge isn’t limited to a specific subject area.

Intellectual curiosity is also a vital aspect of a smart man’s personality. They are passionate about learning and expanding their knowledge base. That makes them even more appealing to others. Smart men with intellectual engagement are curious and eager to explore new ideas, perspectives, and concepts. This quality allows them to offer unique perspectives on various topics and challenges, making them a valuable conversation partner.

Moreover, their intelligence and intellectual curiosity create compatibility and connection with others. A person who can hold interesting conversations and offer unique perspectives will catch the attention of others. Their intelligence and curiosity reflect their open-mindedness, creativity, and willingness to explore new ideas and possibilities. All these qualities make smart men more attractive to potential partners, colleagues, and friends.

2 – Smart Men Have a Sense of Humor and Wit

In addition to intelligence, smart men often have an excellent sense of humor and wit, making them even more attractive. A sense of humor is a crucial quality that can make others feel at ease and break down barriers. These guys are often quick-witted and uniquely able to use humor to their advantage. They can make others laugh and feel at ease, even in difficult or awkward situations.

That makes them more likable and approachable. Wit is also a desirable quality in a smart man. They can think independently, develop clever responses, and make insightful observations. This quick thinking and creativity in humor reflect their intelligence and ability to connect with others on an emotional level. Additionally, a smart man’s humor is often more nuanced and sophisticated than the average person’s humor.

Their intelligence allows them to come up with witty comments and jokes that others might not understand. This makes them even more intriguing. They can use their keen intelligence and creativity to make even the most trivial situations exciting and entertaining. A smart man’s sense of humor and wit are essential to their attractiveness. They can also make others feel at ease and bring joy to others. All of this demonstrates their intelligence and creativity in humor.

3 – Emotional Intelligence and Empathy

Emotional intelligence and empathy are other essential qualities that make smart men attractive. Emotional intelligence refers to understanding and managing one’s own emotions, as well as the feelings of others. Smart men with high emotional intelligence have a keen self-awareness and can regulate their emotions healthily. Empathy is another quality that goes hand in hand with emotional intelligence.

It’s the ability to understand and relate to others’ emotions and experiences, which is a lovely quality. Smart men who possess empathy can connect with others on a deeper level. They build strong relationships based on trust and understanding. Active listening and effective communication are also vital to emotional intelligence and empathy. Smart men who listen actively and communicate effectively can build rapport and create a safe space for others to express themselves.

They can navigate complex interpersonal dynamics, offer support, and offer thoughtful advice when needed. Emotional intelligence and empathy are essential qualities that make smart men attractive. These qualities allow them to form solid and meaningful relationships with others and easily navigate the complexities of interpersonal dynamics. These guys can create a deep sense of connection and intimacy, making them even more appealing to potential partners.

4 – Smart Men Have Confidence and Self-Assuredness

Confidence and self-assuredness are two qualities that are highly attractive in a partner. They have a strong belief and self-assuredness in their abilities and worth. That translates into a confident and assertive demeanor. Smart men who are self-assured have high self-esteem and a positive self-image, which makes them more appealing to others. Confidence and self-assuredness also allow smart men to assert themselves and speak up for their beliefs.

They are unafraid to take risks, make mistakes, or learn from failures. This trait appeals to potential partners who value ambition, drive, and self-assurance. Plus, confidence and self-assuredness can also be contagious. When a smart man exudes confidence, he can inspire others to feel more confident in themselves. This quality can be particularly attractive in a partner, leading to a healthier and more fulfilling relationship.

Confidence and self-assuredness are crucial components of an intelligent man’s attractiveness. They allow them to project a positive self-image, assert themselves in a relationship, and inspire confidence in others. By promoting self-confidence and self-assuredness, we encourage smart men to embrace their strengths and show the world what they can achieve.

5 – Kindness and Altruism

Kindness and altruism are two additional qualities that make smart men highly attractive. These traits reflect a compassionate and caring nature that extends beyond self-interest. Smart men who are kind and altruistic have a profound sense of empathy and understanding for others’ perspectives. They will lend a helping hand. Connecting with others through shared values and experiences is another benefit of kindness and altruism.

Smart men who are kind and charitable can form meaningful relationships with others based on mutual respect and admiration. They value their relationships and prioritize the well-being of others, which can be a highly attractive quality in a partner. Kindness and altruism are contagious qualities that inspire others to be more compassionate and caring.

When a smart man exhibits these qualities, he sets a positive example that can encourage others to do the same. These qualities are essential in making a smart man even more attractive. They reflect a deep sense of empathy, compassion, and willingness to help others, which can lead to meaningful relationships. By promoting kindness and altruism, we can encourage smart men to prioritize the well-being of others. Thus, we can create a more caring and empathetic society.

6 – Independence and Ambition

Independence and ambition are two more qualities that make smart men highly attractive. These qualities reflect a self-sufficient and goal-oriented nature often admired by others. Smart men who are independent have confidence in their abilities and can make their own choices without relying on others. Ambition and drive are attractive qualities that demonstrate a willingness to take risks and pursue one’s goals.

Intelligent, ambitious men envision what they want to achieve. Because of that, they are willing to work hard to make it happen. This quality can appeal to potential partners who value ambition, motivation, and a strong work ethic. Additionally, independence and ambition can be beneficial for a relationship as well. Smart men who are self-sufficient and goal-oriented are more likely to bring their strengths and talents to a partnership.

That can lead to a better, balanced, and fulfilling relationship, as others often admire this self-sufficient and goal-oriented nature. We encourage smart men to pursue their goals and aspirations by promoting independence and ambition. This often leads to a more fulfilling and satisfying life.

Final Thoughts on the Attractiveness of Smart Men

Smart men have a certain allure that goes beyond just their intelligence. Their sense of humor, emotional intelligence, kindness, independence, ambition, and intellectual curiosity all make them highly attractive to others. Embracing and celebrating these qualities can help promote confidence and individuality in smart men. As a result, it can make them even more appealing to potential partners.

Smart men need to recognize and value their unique strengths and qualities. We must encourage them to understand that these traits make them truly attractive. Promoting confidence and individuality can help smart men feel more comfortable expressing themselves and creating deeper connections. Ultimately, being attractive is to be true to oneself and embrace one’s uniqueness. By doing so, these guys can attract those who appreciate them for who they are. As such, they can build fulfilling relationships based on mutual respect, trust, and understanding.

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