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10 Life Lessons We Can Learn From Kobe Bryant

January 27, 2020 by Deborah Tayloe

On January 26, 2020, America lost one of its elite athletes. Known for his on-court skills and the famous “Mamba Mentality,” Kobe Bryant tragically died in a helicopter crash.

Adding to this tragedy, Gianna “GiGi” Bryant also perished. Bryant’s 13-year-old daughter, was an up-and-coming ball player herself.

In total, nine people perished in the crash and blaze that followed. CNN released the names of some of the additional victims:

Christina Mauser, a girls’ basketball coach from Orange County, CA
John Altobelli, a “basketball dad.”
Keri Altobelli, “basketball mom.”
Alyssa Altobelli, GiGi’s teammate
Helicopter pilot, name unreleased at this time

(Note: we will add names to this post as we receive verified information from reliable sources; we will not operate on speculation or hearsay).

About Kobe Bryant

NBA player Joe “Jellybean” Bryant and his wife Pamela Cox Bryant welcomed their son Kobe into the world on August 23, 1978.

Under his father’s guidance, Kobe began learning to play basketball around the age of three. Throughout his childhood, he developed both motor skills and intense knowledge of strategy and continued to grow into his destiny.

And, even after Jellybean’s retirement from the NBA and a move to Italy to play European league ball, Kobe continued to watch basketball videos. His grandfather regularly mailed videos of the best games to Kobe in Italy to analyze.

He learned from watching the greats. In fact, Kobe revealed to ESPN in a 2010 interview:

“I seriously have stolen all my moves from the greatest players.” ~Kobe Bryant

Bryant returned stateside for high school, attending Lower Merion High School, located in Ardmore, Pennsylvania. The Philadelphia suburb proved a competitive training ground. More importantly, it helped young Kobe to hone his on-court skills further.

In 1996, several universities attempted to recruit Bryant to their programs. However, rather than choosing a top-notch school like Duke University, University of Kansas, or UNC, Bryant had another plan. Instead of impressing college, he decided to showcase his talents to the NBA teams. He worked out with his favorite team, the Los Angeles Lakers in 1996.

Did he impress the big league?

Must have. Bryant, at just 17, entered the NBA draft that same year. The Charlotte Hornets signed the young shooting guard to a deal as the number 13 pick in the first round. In a move that must have made them smack a face-palm later, they immediately traded him to the Lakers in exchange for center Vlade Divac.

The rest, as they say, is history. During his career with the Lakers, Bryant earned many distinctions:

5 NBA championship titles (Lakers)
18 All-star game appearances
One-time season MVP

So, what can we take away from one of the greatest NBA players in history? These life lessons from Kobe Bryant remind us that mindset, hard work, and perseverance point us towards success. Take a look.

The Mamba Mentality

As mentioned, this man was a student of his sport. In fact, he developed such a sharp understanding of the game that he made split on-court decisions that won games. Sports fans and commentators dubbed this the Mamba Mentality, referring to the deadly snake whose bite is swift and deadly.

However, this was a compliment–it showed respect for the natural abilities of the player.

10 Life Lessons from Kobe Bryant

1 – “The moment you give up, is the moment you let someone else win.”

Of course, winning is everything to an elite athlete. But, how can you relate? Do you want to promote to a new job? Or, do you aspire to finish a degree you never completed? You must also develop an abundant mindset and gather the courage to “go for the win” in life.

We live in a competitive world. Besides, we are competing on a global level thanks to the internet. To get what you want, you must work for it. Because ultimately, giving up means a 100% chance of failure.

2 – “If you’re afraid to fail, then you’re probably going to fail.”

This is one of the most profound life lessons we can take from Kobe Bryant.

Why?

Almost all human beings fear failure, it’s an integral part of our “wiring.” However, it’s what we do with that fear that matters. You can overcome your fear and use that energy to reach your goals. Instead, harness the negative energy. You know it–the little voice that whispers that you’re not good enough. Then, change your mindset and use that energy to power forward and accomplish all that you want in life.

3 – “Haters are a good problem to have. Nobody hates the good ones. They hate the great ones.”

Too often, we worry about what other people think. Sometimes, we care more about impressing our Instagram followers than becoming truly happy.

So while you might not want others to hate you, success breeds jealousy. If you become successful, those who envy you will develop negative feelings. Rise above that, hold your head high and enjoy all the benefits of your hard work…despite the haters

4 – “I create my own path. It was straight and narrow. I looked at it this way: you were either in my way or out of it.”

The Mamba Mentality meant that nothing stood in the way of success on the basketball court. This legendary player did not allow others to stop him from scoring points and winning games.

Although this sounds ruthless, the truth is that there’s still a life lesson in this Kobe Bryant quote. We must carve our own path in life and stick to it. Of course, you will meet naysayers along the way who try to distract you. But don’t give in to their negative energy.

Reach the goals that best serve you and your loved ones– it’s the true way to genuine happiness.

5 – “Use your success, wealth and influence to put them in the best position to realize their own dreams and find their true purpose.”

Despite the Mamba Mentality, this superstar had a big heart off the court. He took ownership of managing his money in a way that he grew wealthier. As a result, he branched out into philanthropic ventures.

From mentoring underrepresented female athletes to providing after-school programs to needy inner-city kids, Bryant and his wife Vanessa believed in giving back.

So even if you’re not a millionaire sports legend, you, too, can make a difference. Find a cause you love. It can be working with shelter animals, homeless people, or aging veterans. Then…commit to it.

You’ll find that you are receiving back more than you are giving.

6 – “I realized that intimidation didn’t really exist if you’re in the right frame of mind.”

Have you ever been bullied, put down, or belittled? This quote offers a fresh perspective–you allow yourself to be intimidated.

Feeling intimidated–or not–is a mindset. Choose to deflect the negative energy and brush it off. Even though that is easier said than done, this rule of Mamba Mentality will help you rid yourself of these toxic people.

7 – “The most important thing is to try and inspire people so that they can be great in whatever they want to do.”

Again, the Mamba reveals a softer side. Off the court, Bryant served as a role model for young athletes around the world.

Regardless of your profession, you cannot help but admire someone who approached his game with such mechanical precision. Furthermore, you can learn from the man’s continuous desire to improve and succeed both on- and off-court.

So, find someone who inspires you. Strive to improve your mindset and set goals. In time, you will become great at doing what you love.

8 – “Once you know what failure feels like, determination chases success.”

Athletes in every sport know that the opposite of the victory is the ice-cold feeling that stems from defeat.

All of us face setbacks, roadblocks, or challenges in life. However, only with determination and a positive mindset can you view these as “temporary.”

The truth is that failure is part of life. It teaches us lessons that we could not learn otherwise. However, moving forward after failing with a renewed sense of confidence urgency will set you back on the right path.

So bounce back, set your goals, chase your dreams, and refuse to let others hold you back.

9 – “A lot of leaders fail because they don’t have the bravery to touch that nerve or strike that chord.”

Being successful at what you do requires bravery. And that sometimes means that you’ll annoy others as you stand up for what you believe is right.

Think of some of the most effective social activists and leaders of all time:

Mahatma Gandhi
Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Nelson Mandela
Steven Biko
Jesus

Sometimes, you must be brave enough to stand up for what is right. And that means you have the heart of a leader.

10 – “I can’t relate to lazy people. We don’t speak the same language. I don’t understand you. I don’t want to understand you.”

This life lesson reminds us that Kobe Bryant worked hard to perfect his game. Although some might argue that Bryant was “born into” basketball, the fact remains that he began training at the early age of three and watching videos as a pre-teen.

Undoubtedly, he had a natural talent. However, he also possessed the work ethic that took that talent to the next level in his career. He was willing to mentor anyone who was willing to put in time and energy.

And isn’t that something we should all try to do?

Final Thoughts on Taking Life Lessons from Kobe Bryant

Kobe Bryant retired from basketball and went on to continue to mentor others and give back to the world. He led basketball camps, advocated for women athletes, contributed to the homeless, and loved providing for LA’s neediest children. We all watched this gifted teenager grow into manhood in front of the world.

And he was far from perfect–he was perfectly flawed. Like all of us. Ultimately, that’s what made Kobe so likable a guy. The juxtaposition between the ruthless Mamba Mentality and the sweet dad and mentor fascinated all of us.

Kobe Bryant’s life philosophy was simple. Honor him by achieving all that you can. Focus on the positive, develop a mentally strong mindset, and work hard. Then, you can achieve all your goals. Rest in peace, Mamba.

Scientists Reveal How Junk Food Causes Depression

January 27, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Junk food is cheap, convenient, and tasty, but everyone knows it’s bad for your body. It can increase the risk of obesity, which in turn increases the risk of depression along with other diseases. But did you know that junk food is also bad for mental health, not just physical health?

Experts suggested that unhealthy fast foods are partially to blame for depressive symptoms for years. And now, there is scientific evidence of this fact.

Scientists Reveal How Junk Food Causes Depression And 10 Foods That Can Help

How Junk Food Causes Depression

A study entitled “Fast-food and commercial baked goods consumption and the risk of depression”, published in the Public Health Nutrition journal, confirmed the link between junk food and mental health disorder risk.

The study found that those who consume fast food regularly are 51% more likely to wind up developing symptoms of depression when compared to those who eat little to no junk food. Increased junk food consumption also increases risks. Thus, the more you eat, the more susceptible you become.

A study sample of 8,964 individuals participated in a study, all from the University of Navarra Diet and Lifestyle Tracking Program’s SUN Project. Each participant, none of which had a diagnosis of depression when the study began, was assessed over the course of around 6 months. After the study period was over, 493 individuals were prescribed antidepressants or were diagnosed with a depressive disorder.

From these results, researchers were able to determine that even consuming small amounts of junk food, even commercially baked goods lead to increased depression risk. Individuals consuming junk food were also found to work very long hours, smoke, be less active, have poor diets, and be single.

Though more research is needed, study authors are positive that those avoiding depressive symptoms should cut down on their junk food consumption overall.

Additional Negative Effects Of Junk Food

Junk food isn’t just responsible for depression. It can have adverse effects on a wide range of bodily systems, organs, and functions. Here are some of them:

1. Respiratory System

When you eat junk food, you’re opening yourself up to the risk of weight gain. Obesity and excess weight of any kind increases the risk of damage to your respiratory system, potentially leading to breathing difficulties and even asthma.

This is because the extra weight puts more pressure than usual on your lungs and heart, meaning you could lose your breath from simple tasks like walking or climbing stairs. This is even more apparent in children, as those who consume fast food thrice weekly have been found to have an increased risk of asthma development.

Of course, you won’t necessarily receive respiratory problems from rare junk food meals, especially if you work out and keep your weight down. But it is still a risk factor.

2. Skeletal System

When you eat junk food, the extra sugar and carbohydrates lead to more acid production in your mouth. Eventually, over time, this can lead to the diminishing of enamel on the teeth. Thus, you increase the risk of bacterial infection and cavities.

In addition, the potential weight gain from regular junk food consumption could lead to muscle mass and bone density problems if it develops into obesity. Overweight individuals have a higher risk of breaking bones, and a higher risk of falling and developing injuries in general.

3. Reproductive System

Studies indicate that the ingredients used in junk food can be damaging to your reproductive system and fertility. Phthalates, specifically, are chemicals that change hormone function in the body, and they are commonly found in processed foods.

Exposure to a lot of this chemical can result in reproductive problems, ranging from cycle irregularity to birth defects. If you’ve been having trouble with fertility, seeking to reduce junk food consumption may have a positive effect.

4. Cardiovascular and Digestive Systems

The huge amount of carbohydrates in junk food is typically accompanied by little to no fiber. This means that the body will be breaking down and absorbing a lot of carbs into your blood, causing a significant spike in blood sugar.

Lower in your body, the pancreas releases insulin in order to transport the glucose (sugar) from the carbs all over your body. In a healthy body, this goes off without a hitch. But in a body that is overly used to consuming high levels of carbs, this can be especially dangerous as your body’s standard insulin production procedures falter.

This will eventually lead to type 2 diabetes, as well as other issues caused by insulin resistance, like weight gain, PCOS, cardiovascular disease, and more.

5. Integumentary system impacted by junk food

This system, which basically consists of your skin, hair, and nails, can be affected by what you eat. Past experts believed that greasy foods and chocolate were the culprits for acne, but more recent research indicates that carbohydrates might be even more at fault.

This is due to the aforementioned blood sugar spikes, which may lead to acne production. In teenagers and children, consuming fast food thrice weekly is enough to increase the risk of developing eczema.

Ten Foods That Can Help Ease Depression

1. Berries

Berries are packed with antioxidants, and these are known for helping repair DNA, fixing cells and reducing the risk of cancer and other similar diseases. Numerous studies have indicated that antioxidants are able to lower depressive symptoms and risks, increasing positive thinking and mental health.

Raspberries and strawberries are great options, but blueberries are by far the best choice thanks to their high polyphenol and vitamin C content. Wild blueberry juice has also been found to boost the general mood within hours.

2. Fermented Foods

An unhealthy gut can lead to an unhealthy mental state, according to numerous forms of research conducted over the years. While experts are still working on uncovering the exact reasons for this, the results don’t lie.

Kimchi, miso, tempeh, kombucha, sauerkraut, yogurt, and tamari are all good fermented food options for battling depression.

3. Leafy Greens

Dark, leafy greens are packed with nutrients and are among the most commonly recommended foods for literally any purpose. They boost immunity, reduce cancer risk, and reduce brain inflammation, which can lead to depression.

Swiss chard, kale, watercress, cabbage, collards, and spinach are all great options – and if you need a break in between leafy greens, broccoli and peppers also work.

4. Avocado

This increasingly popular food is famous among health fanatics for a reason. It’s packed with good fats, vitamins, and 11g of dietary fiber in just one fruit.

Healthy fats are important brain-boosters, and the lack of sugar in this fruit also makes it even healthier than other fruits in many cases. The fat in avocados is oleic acid, which helps your brain run smoothly.

5. Walnuts

You likely already know that the mix of antioxidants, omega-3 fatty acids, and vitamin E in walnuts are good for the cardiovascular system, but it’s actually also good for lowering depression risk thanks to its healthy fat content.

In fact, a recent study conducted with the data from more than 26,00 different adults in America was able to definitively link increased positive thinking and reduced depression risk with regular walnut consumption. Eating just an ounce of walnuts daily can reduce depression scores by 26%! This is 8% lower than any other type of nut provides.

6. Dark Chocolate

Eating very highly sweetened chocolate can count as eating junk food, and that’s why dark chocolate is such a good option. Cocoa beans have an antioxidant known as flavonoids, and these are well-known for boosting mood and positive thinking.

Milk chocolate and other non-dark chocolates have fewer flavonoids and more dairy and sugar, making them less effective. But dark chocolate – especially of 80% and above – works wonders!

7. Salmon

Salmon has two nutrients that make it useful for battling depression. The first is omega-3, a fatty acid which is a form of good fat. As we’ve previously discussed, this is great for improving the overall health of the brain. Salmon is especially powerful here because it has EPA and DHA, which are even more beneficial.

The second nutrient is vitamin D. Those who have lower levels of vitamin D in their bodies are often found to have a higher risk of developing depression. While it’s not easy to have a vitamin D deficiency, you may still not be getting exactly enough.

8. Beans

Beans are great for the cardiovascular and digestive systems. They’re very high in fiber, which allows them to absorb carbohydrates and sugars that you eat, preventing them from entering the bloodstream. High-fiber foods also digest more slowly. So, you stay full for longer and don’t wind up eating excess junk food.

Gut health and mental health work hand-in-hand. Furthermore, fiber can also aid in the production of short-chain fatty acids. And that reduces the risk of inflammation in the brain, which can cause depression.

9. Tomatoes

Tomatoes are full of nutrients that can fight depression. Folic acid is its main benefit. Among those with depression, folate deficiency is surprisingly common, accounting for ? of every patient with the disorder.

This may be because folic acid is capable of balancing homocysteine production. Homocysteine is responsible for limiting dopamine, serotonin, norepinephrine, and other positive neurotransmitters.

Another good component in tomatoes is alpha-lipoic acid. It is capable of helping to balance mood, and it also assists the body in energy production from glucose.

10. Oysters

Oysters contain healthy levels of zinc. And, studies find a link between low zinc levels and depression. In fact, there are experts who genuinely recommend regular oyster consumption to their patients in order to boost their cognitive ability and mood.

Oysters are the best foods for this particular job, but if you’re not a fan, you can also opt for any other kinds of shellfish. Either way, you’ll get zinc, fatty acids, vitamin B12, and selenium. Each of these links back to mental health.

Final Thoughts on the Connection Between Junk Food and Depression

Junk food does no one any favors. It is irrevocably bad with no redeeming qualities, and the fact that it can cause and worsen depression is even more reason to avoid it.

So you don’t have to cut out junk food permanently and 100%. However, it’s a good idea to cut down on eating these empty calories to the point where they’re a rare treat. Instead of eating junk food, focus on eating foods that power the brain and have positive effects on mood!

15 Benefits of Asana Yoga to Never Ignore

January 26, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Though Asana yoga is thousands of years old, it is only in the past couple hundred years that it spread to the western world. Today, yoga is well-known all over the globe. People use it as a form of exercise, a kind of meditation, and for many other reasons to promote health and wellness in their lives. Whether you are new to yoga or interested in elevating your practice, asana in yoga is an excellent way to improve your physical body as well as take advantage of other yoga benefits in your life.

Asana is a term that refers to the physical practice of the poses used in yoga. Yogis use it to refer to all physical aspects of yoga as well as an individual posture. It is one of the eight “limbs” of yoga practice. The other limbs are:

pranayama (breathing)
dhyana (meditation)
yamas (social conduct)
niyamas (self-observance)
pratyahara (sensory withdrawal)
dharana (concentration)
samadhi (bliss)

Asana yoga is one of the most beautiful ways to effect a positive change in your life. Paying attention to the way you move your body and the yoga benefits that come from your practice give you a foundation to build the remaining limbs of yoga in your life. This discipline can help you achieve your health and wellness goals.

Yoga benefits are well-known. Asana yoga focuses on the postures and poses of the body in yoga practice for it to be productive and healthy for the body. These are just fifteen of the many, many benefits of the asana of yoga.

15 Benefits of Asana Yoga

1. Improved flexibility

One of the primary yoga benefits is improved flexibility. Yoga practice is designed to move the body and improve flexibility through gentle movements and held poses. The more you practice asana in yoga, the easier the poses will become. Like any exercise regimen, a regular yoga practice will condition your body to the poses and movements, making them easier for your physical body. This reason explains why yoga can be so effective for those with limited mobility.

2. Improved muscle strength

Asana yoga uses your body weight in your exercise to achieve tangible results. Regular yoga practice improves your muscle strength in the same way it improves your flexibility. The more you do yoga, the more your body is conditioned to the movements and poses in your practice. Also, once you begin to gain strength and the yoga poses begin to get easier, you can move to more advanced poses to continue challenging yourself.

3. Improves spine health and posture

Your spine is a vital part of your physical health, but it’s also a part that many people neglect or overlook frequently. From sitting improperly at desks to using the wrong pillow at night, we can cause our spine a lot of stress. A focus on asana in yoga places a strong emphasis on the posture of your yoga poses, which typically require good posture, creating a straight line from your head all the way through your body. As you focus on straightening your spine in your yoga practice, you’ll find yourself keeping the same posture throughout your day, as well.

4. Reduces depression and anxiety

Yoga has a meditative quality to it that helps fight anxiety. Unlike other exercise regimens, yoga uses slow movements and held poses, aligned with conscious breathing, to achieve the desired results. Yoga practice allows you to focus on your breath and your body’s movements. This benefit is why yoga is effective as a form of meditation. Furthermore, it proves time and time again to be effective in fighting symptoms of depression and anxiety.

5. Increases blood flow

There are lots of exercise programs that are used to get the blood flowing. In fact, almost any form of exercise is effective for increasing blood flow. The poses in yoga do the same, and they do it gently so as not to overtax your system. In addition, yoga helps get oxygen to your cells better, which also helps improve your blood flow and circulation health.

6. Improves emotional health

When you feel better physically, you typically feel better emotionally, as well. As a low-impact exercise, yoga allows you to breathe consciously, align your breath and movements, and to concentrate on the moment you are in. This mindfulness helps improve your emotional health, making you generally feel more at peace, happier, and less emotionally distressed.

7. Facilitates a healthier eating lifestyle

For many people, a regular yoga practice opens up additional changes in their lives. One thing that often changes is a healthier eating lifestyle. What you eat can have an impact on your yoga practice. Yoga teachers may recommend a yogic diet to improve your practice, which may include fewer red meats and more whole foods like fresh fruits and vegetables. When you start eating healthier, you’ll not only improve your health, but you’ll feel better and improve your yoga practice, as well.

8. Improves mental focus

Mindfulness is a way to focus your mind on the present and prioritize your thinking patterns to what is truly relevant and important in your life. As a result, you develop a mental clarity that can greatly improve your overall mental focus. Being able to focus like this can help you in your career as well as in your personal life.

9. Improves physical balance

Many yoga poses require some balance. Not all poses are as complex as headstands or balancing the body on one foot, but they do require you to be able to be balanced. As you build a regular yoga practice, your balance will improve, and you’ll find even more complex poses easier to manage. The balance you learn through yoga will help improve your balance throughout the day, as well.

10. Facilitates physical relaxation

Since yoga uses slow movements and held poses, it is more relaxing than other forms of exercise. While other exercise regimens get your heart going and push your muscles to extremes, yoga uses your body’s muscles more gently, which helps you relax your physical body instead of tensing up. This can help reduce the chance of getting muscle aches and knots from your exercise regimen.

11. Facilitates mental relaxation

Along with physical relaxation, yoga facilitates mental relaxation, as well. The focus on breathing and slow movements calms the mind and turns your thoughts to the present. For that moment, you are not worrying about the future or dwelling on the past. For the duration of your practice, you can let go of the mental stresses of your life.

Read to learn how yoga helped one person recover from a broken heart.

12. Allows increased oxygen intake

When you move from pose to pose in your yoga practice, you inhale or exhale based on the movement and the pose you are moving to. This technique aligns your breath with your movements. Your yoga instructor may also advise you to take a few slow breaths while holding a pose. Whether moving or holding a pose, the slow, deep breathing of yoga increases the oxygen brought into the body. This improvement in breathing can help your cells do their jobs better to keep your body healthy.

13. Eases physical pain

Both acute and chronic pain can be debilitating, keeping you from living your life the way you want. Fortunately, your yoga practice can ease your physical pain. The movements and poses move your muscles, which can reduce the tension that leads to knots or strains. The movement can also reduce inflammation, which can cause chronic pain, such as arthritis and fibromyalgia. Even if an injury causes your pain, yoga moves your body gently, which helps your body heal more effectively, which can reduce the pain of the injury.

14. Promotes self-care

In recent years, there has been a big push for self-care practices, which means engaging in practices that promote your mind, body, and spirit health. Integrating asana in your yoga practice is a way to engage in self-care. Yoga has physical, mental, and emotional benefits to your health. That means you take care of yourself when you practice yoga.

15. Facilitates positive change in your life

Most people come to yoga because they want to experience the numerous benefits it carries. Whether you are seeking benefit in body, mind, or spirit, a regular yoga practice can help you make positive changes in your life through increased physical health, improved mental health, and greater emotional awareness.

Learn about the warrior pose and other yoga postures.

Final Thought on Embracing Asana Yoga as Part of Your Daily Life

No matter the reason you have come to a practice, asana yoga benefits can be impactful in every area of your life. Implementing asanas in your yoga practice, which means an emphasis on the poses and movements, can maximize these yoga benefits to achieve your health and wellness goals. You don’t have to be an expert yogi to implement asanas into your practice. Instead, all it takes is a desire to make improvements in your life through the practice of yoga.

5 Effective Ways To Swap a Negative Mindset for a Positive One

January 26, 2020 by Lakeisha Ethans

The way you think dictates your life, your world, and how you handle different situations. It can dramatically affect your mental health, so having a negative mindset can damage your psyche.

But changing an ingrained mindset, no matter how bad it is, can be challenging. Here are 5 effective ways to change a negative mindset and replace it with a positive one to help you out.

1. Identify Triggers of Negative Thought Patterns

As with all things, you cannot change a negative mindset if you don’t confront it head-on and reflect upon its causes. Finding the worst of your negativity triggers is often the first big step in overcoming those thoughts and shifting towards more productive and positive thinking.

Identifying a trigger usually involves being aware of the events that are leading to the instigation of negativity. To help foster this awareness, when you notice a negative thought pattern, start practicing the act of understanding its roots. Here are some questions you can ask yourself to get started:

· What Was It That Happened?

Ask yourself what happened that led up to your negative explosion. Try and think about all the little details. Triggers can be surprisingly subtle and difficult to catch!

· Where Did This Happen?

Sometimes, the environment can be the cause for the triggering of something negative. Maybe it was too crowded, too loud, or somewhere you were uncomfortable. Maybe it reminded you of other negative events. Think about it!

· Who Was With Me When This Happened?

Sometimes, people can play a role in their reactions. Being around people who are experiencing negative thoughts can make you more prone to similar patterns, and agitated or aggressive people may further trigger these reactions in you.

· When Did This Begin To Happen?

Can you pinpoint the exact moment your emotions became more heightened? Can you see a trend of negative thoughts forming during certain periods of the day or even week?

· What Happened Right After That?

Think about what happened next. Did that further your negative thoughts or help them? What do the results of the events and your thoughts mean for the reality of the situation?

2. Pay Attention To Your Negativity and Patterns

You already know that you must confront negative patterns, but you can’t really do that if you’re not paying enough attention to them. Self-awareness is the key to understanding a negative mindset and learning to change it to a positive one. Here are some tips for paying attention to yourself in productive ways:

· Pay Attention To Reactions of Emotional Intensity

Emotional reactions to events are not inherently wrong or unhealthy. However, noticing them, understanding them, and being aware of their intensity is crucial to understanding a negative mindset and swapping it to the positive. For example, when someone rejects you, you ask out, do you feel a little hurt and need a few hours to recover? Or do you spend a week moping about at home? As another example, when someone cuts in your lane on the road, do you briefly shake your head at their dangerous actions, or do you start shouting expletives? Take note of how intense your emotional reactions are, and you’ll be able to find reactions that indicate a more serious negative root issue getting in the way of your positive thinking.

· Pay Attention To Automatic Thoughts

Automatic thoughts are mostly uncontrollable, and they occur naturally, as an immediate response to personal interpretations of input and circumstances. These thoughts are usually shaped by ingrained beliefs, past experiences, and worries. For example, when you receive a message marked “urgent” from an employer, you might immediately begin to fear that you’re in trouble, even though you haven’t opened the message yet! Or when someone is dressed nicely, you might instantly think about how bad you look in comparison, even though that’s an unproductive thought. Learning to catch and notice these automatic thoughts helps you dig at their roots, so you can change them as you go.

· Keep A Thought Journal

If you have trouble with being aware of your thoughts and patterns, try logging them in a journal. You can opt to write down notable thoughts when they occur or record them all at the end of the day by brainstorming your day’s events. This is a commonly used trick in many therapy and treatment plans for mental health issues related to negativity and anxiety. If you record your negative thoughts, you’ll see your negative mindset and will be able to take steps to move towards a more positive one.

3. Add Positive Habits To Your Routine

Changing a negative mindset often means making bigger adjustments to your overall life. Often, the habits you form could be responsible for enabling or furthering the worst of your negativity. Here are some positive habits that you can try incorporating into your regular life to shift your thinking and encourage a healthier mind slowly:

· Create A Good Morning Routine

If you get a bad start to the day, you’re not going to feel good about yourself. That’s why the incorporation of a healthy morning routine can be crucial to developing a more positive way of thinking. It’s up to you how you make your morning routine better. Still, simple factors like ensuring a healthy breakfast, getting some time for exercise, or using positive affirmations can help make you feel better from the get-go before you even leave your house.

· Stop To Breathe

In this bustling, fast-paced world, you could use a little time to slow down and rest your mind, letting your worries slip away. Use reminders, alarms, and even scheduled blocks of time to remember to stop what you’re doing and take a breather. It doesn’t have to be for a long time – just five minutes will work wonders for your positive thinking and stress levels. As time goes on, try incorporating the breathing break whenever you feel your negative mindset rearing its ugly head.

· Try Mindfulness

Mindfulness refers to the act of living in the present. It means letting go of worries about the future and thoughts about the past and simply existing as you are. A lot of people attribute it to meditation, which you can certainly add to your routine. But mindfulness is about more than that. It means being aware of and appreciating your world. It means taking note of everyday things you usually take for granted, and it means learning to let bad things slide off your back so you can take things one step and a time when needed. It’s a great way to shift to a more positive mindset!

4. Hit Pause – Not Stop!

Sometimes, the quickest way to change negativity to positivity is by directly stopping that bad thought pattern in its tracks. The important part is learning to pause the pattern to change it, not stop and block the pattern permanently to the point where it is never followed through on. Here are some elaborations on this:

· Pause To Restructure

If you don’t hit pause when you first experience a negative thought or reaction, you won’t be able to catch it and take note of your initial impulse. If you feel that negativity bursting forth, stop and think first. This is especially true if you tend to give in to vices and unhealthy coping mechanisms when sad or if you lash out at those around you when angry. These strong emotional reactions can be prevented if you learn to pause before they take over you.

· Choose To Change

When you pause, you’re giving yourself a few seconds to make a choice. Do you want to handle your emotions explosively, or do you want to be proactive and wise? Do you want to allow your negative mindset to rule you, or do you want to teach yourself more positive ways of handling what you feel? This choice is up to you!

· Remember, Don’t Stop, Just Pause

There’s a difference between pausing to understand your emotions and stopping them altogether. Trying to stop a negative thought process, emotion, or reaction by simply repressing it will lower positive thinking in the long run. At no point has negative repression ever been beneficial to one’s mindset! If you want to swap bad thoughts for good thoughts, you have to allow yourself to confront your thoughts, not avoid or ignore them.

5. Create New Thoughts

The most crucial part about changing your mindset from negative to positive is the act of learning to create new thoughts. Your replacement process won’t work if you don’t have good thoughts to slide into the spots left behind. These can be simply positive thoughts that contradict the initial bad ones, or they can be careful corrections of your original thinking. Here are some examples of replacement thoughts:

· Example 1

Initial negative thought: I’m going to be in so much trouble if I mess up this project!

Positive replacement thought: I’m equipped with great skills for this project and can do a great job on it!

Alternative positive replacement thought: This project is quite a challenge; what a great opportunity to learn!

· Example 2

Initial negative thought: Wow, what a jerk, he almost drove right into me and killed me!

Positive replacement thought: That was quite scary, but I know I’m a good driver, and I could have handled things going south.

Alternative positive replacement thought: I’m thanking my lucky stars that the driver missed me just in time!

· Example 3

Initial negative thought: It’s going to be so tough when we move to a new city.

Positive replacement thought: It may be a challenge to adapt to a new city, but I know we’ll be able to address any issues as we go.

Alternative positive replacement thought: Moving to a new city opens up so many opportunities for us!

· Example 4

Initial negative thought: I can’t believe that person was so mean to me, what a terrible person.

Positive replacement thought: That person seems like they’re having a rough day. I hope they cheer up soon!

Alternative positive replacement thought: I don’t need to expend energy being angry about someone’s unfairness; I know I handled myself well!

Final Thoughts On Some Effective Ways To Achieve A Positive Mindset

A negative mindset can make the difference between success and failure. Your brain is such a powerful thing, and dedicating it to something positive allows you to manifest the very best out of life!

Therapists Reveal Signs That Someone Is A Victim Of Domestic Violence

January 26, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Domestic violence affects nearly 3 million people each year. Women and men both fall victim to this horrendous act every single day. Often, they do no tell anyone what they are going through.

Knowing the warning signs can change their life for the better. These signs may be the only way you will ever know that something is wrong. Never ignore it if you suspect that there is abuse, even when the person tries to hide it.

While you shouldn’t ignore the signs, you also shouldn’t push too hard if the victim isn’t willing to talk. It can only cause them to isolate themselves further from those who love and care about them. Asking about it gently is always worth it, however, so knowing how to tell if someone is a victim of domestic violence is essential.

The Primary Warning Signs of Domestic Violence

According to the counselors at the National Domestic Violence Hotline, here are some of the key things you’ll see.

Physical Signs

Blackened eye(s)
Split or swollen lip
Marks on their neck (ordinarily red or purple)
Sprains in their wrist
Bruises, frequently on their arms
Unexplained injuries that occur often
Broken bones with explanations that don’t add up

Emotional Signs

Low self-esteem, especially if they didn’t have low self-esteem before
Apologies too often, especially about insignificant things
Timid behavior
Fearful most of the time
Changes in eating or sleeping patterns
Unexplained anxiety or always on edge
Drug use
Depression
No longer participating in activities they once enjoyed
No longer enjoying hobbies
Suicidal comments

Behavioral Signs

Unusually withdrawn or distant
Backing out of plans or appointments at the last minute
Missing important meetings
Showing up late often
Being overly concerned about the privacy of their personal life
Isolating themselves from those they were close to

Why The Domestic Violence Victim Might Stay With Their Abuser

For someone who has never been the victim of domestic violence, it may be difficult to understand why a victim stays. Some of the reasons include:

Fear of physical retaliation if they try to leave
They still feel love for their abuser
They believe or hope their abuser will change
Their abuser promises to change and shows remorse
For married couples, some victims don’t believe in divorce
When a couple has children, the victim may be staying only so the children’s lives aren’t uprooted
They believe the violence is their fault
Low self-confidence
Fear of being lonely since they may have isolated themselves from their loved ones
The pressure to stay from those who don’t know about the violence
Not enough money to live on their own
No place to go or a vehicle of their own

How You Can Help a Domestic Violence Victim

1. Make time in your schedule for them

Even if they have canceled plans at the last minute before, make sure you have time to spend with them. Sometimes it’s hard for victims also to ask to spend time together, and it can be even harder for them to leave their homes.

Always make yourself available to them so that they know you aren’t going to turn your back on them. This situation may lead to opening up to you and asking for assistance. Just remember to always protect yourself, too, by setting up plans when things seem to be calm for the victim so that you don’t find yourself in the middle of a domestic dispute.

2. Begin the conversation about your worries.

If you wait for the victim to open up on their own, you may get nowhere. Instead, calmly and gently tell them that you are worried about them. Explain why you are afraid and point out the changes that you have noticed.

Assure the victim that you’ll be discreet about anything that you discuss, and don’t pressure them to continue talking if they seem uncomfortable. Only keep asking questions if the victim is readily willing to give answers because making them uncomfortable could cause them to avoid making plans with you next time.

3. Listen but don’t judge

Remember, you may not understand why a victim stays in a violent situation. It isn’t for you to decide. Your only mission is to help the victim when they are ready.

This impartiality means that as you listen to them, don’t be judgmental. You should even try to avoid giving unsolicited advice or solutions. Simply let the victim talk until they don’t want to talk anymore.

Now, don’t think you can’t ask questions to clarify things they describe. Those types of questions are generally okay. Just remember that it is most important to be there to listen.

4. Tell the victim that you believe them

Often, in a domestic situation, the abuser can hide their true colors from those outside of the home. This behavior makes it hard for a victim to come forward with the truth because they may be afraid they won’t be believed. To make it easier for the victim to keep going to you for help, make sure they know that you understand them.

Just knowing they have someone who believes what they are saying will give them hope for the future and a small dose of relief in the present. Say things to them like “I believe you,” “none of this is your fault,” and “you don’t deserve do go through this.”

5. Validate their feelings, even if they are contradictory

In this type of situation, the victim may understand how terrible their abuser is and still feel love toward them. They also may feel guilty themselves while also being angry. Another common emotional contradiction is for the victim to have hope but also feel despair.

Don’t question their feelings. Instead, validate them. Tell the victim that it is reasonable to feel the way that they are feeling.

Most importantly, tell them that what is happening to them is not okay. Make it clear that living with constant fear, guilt, despair, or any other feelings that are brought on by the situation is not normal.

Sometimes, victims may not even realize that their situation is abnormal. If the victim experienced this type of violence as a child or witnessed many couples harm each other, chances are they believe it’s normal.

Again, do not be judgmental as you validate their feelings, but do tell them that they are in a dangerous situation that could escalate at any time and that you are worried about them.

6. Offer your help and support

Be specific when offering by telling the victim precisely what you can and will do for them. Help them look up phone numbers and other resources that can help them. They may need to contact social services, an attorney, a therapist, or even the police.

Try to go in prepared with brochures, or pamphlets about their situation, but don’t pull them out unless they vocalize that they do want help. Pulling out your information too soon could spook the victim and make them not want to talk.

If the victim asks for help with something specific and you are able (and willing) to do it, definitely step up and get it done. If not, offer them information to a resource that can help them with their specific request.

The most important thing is always to be available for them to reach out to or for moral support during the process.

7. Help come up with a safety plan

Even if the victim isn’t quite ready to leave their situation yet, they will need a safety plan for when violence occurs again, if it escalates or if they decide they need to leave home. Creating a safety plan will make it easier for them to escape because they will already have it in mind, and they will be more psychologically prepared to do it.

In the safety plan, you should include a safe place to go, an excuse to leave, a code word that only family and close friends know that signifies that help is needed, a list of emergency contacts, and an escape bag. The escape bag should include:

cash
birth certificates
social security cards
any other important documents
keys
basic toiletries
a change of clothes

Read to learn how to offer support to someone who left an abusive relationship.

Final Thoughts On Helping A Domestic Violence Victim

Victims of domestic violence don’t always want help. Even if all of the warning signs are there, don’t push if they don’t want to talk. It is essential to be available to speak with them, however, just in case they are ready to accept some help from you.

Have your resources ready so that you have them prepared the moment they ask for help. Assure the victim that they are not alone in the situation. For further assistance, the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1?800?799?7233 can offer immediate assistance.

Remember always to protect yourself first. If you feel like your own life may be in danger, back off and call the police immediately. You can’t rescue everyone, and your safety is imperative, too.

How to Find Beauty in Everything (Even If It Doesn’t Look Beautiful)

January 25, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Life is beautiful. But although it is, many people get so focused on their personal problems that somehow they forget to enjoy the beauty and positivity around them. Sometimes, we need to do what the adage tells us. Take the time to stop what we are doing smell the intoxicating fragrance of the roses surrounding us.

Here is why.

We can draw a parallel between seeing the beauty in everything around us and a mindset of positivity. For while we may observe the darker side of humanity, and remain cautiously aware of it, we can choose the path to light, instead. Indeed, research proves time and time again that a positive mindset is at the core of well-balanced mental health.

So let’s look together at five ways we can find beauty–and therefore, positivity–in the world at large.

5 Ways to See the Beauty in Everything

1 – Learn from children

All the great persons try to learn something new from everybody. But the ones that may teach us more about life are the ones who know less about it. That is the true beauty of children.

Children know how to play and enjoy the game. They will get upset in one second only to forget the next one. The most sincere friendships are made during childhood when there are no judgments and social differences. It may sound a cliché, but it’s true.

Furthermore, children have a dogged determination as they set out to master their worlds. Research suggests that this stems from their unspoiled intrinsic motivation, a natural lean towards learning new concepts. Sadly, some people lose that internal drive as adults, causing us to feel stuck or unmotivated in life.

Here’s one final note about learning from kids.

All adults have an inner child, being more or less aware of it. Some will release that child in the company of other children, while others won’t be able to control it during difficult times. But one should stop a moment and watch the world through a child’s eyes. It’s the only way to see all the wonders that are around us.

2 – Wake up with a purpose

Mornings may be stressful, especially when all kinds of worries replace the promise of a new day. Those who want to change their life should start the new day in an exciting manner. Writing a list with desired activities is an excellent habit to adopt. If the job is super stressful, try to wake up earlier and make a personal routine.

Do you struggle to wake up enough to try to find beauty in the early hours of the dawn? Then, try adjusting your nighttime habits to make way for a smoother morning routine.

Once you awaken, find something to do that inspires you and nurtures your soul. That could be jogging for some or yoga for others. Or, it might be a prime time for you to read a chapter of a book you love, do some affirmations, or indulge in an extra-long shower before work.

These morning activities will offer you peace for the entire day and will help you think in a positive way.

3 – Appreciate the inherent beauty in nature

Every day is beautiful, but there are those days when people feel more inspired. Chalk it up to human nature. But, this fact arises from a state of mind. In fact, it really doesn’t matter if it’s a rainy or sunny day.

There’s a magical feeling when you head out of doors. The feeling of a cooling breeze on a hot summer evening or the beauty of blooming wildflowers blooming makes you feel connected back to Mother Earth. Furthermore, that connection to nature can help minimize feelings of anxiety and stress. In fact, a recent study shares that time spent in nature relieves both the physical and the mental ravages of stress in your life.

So whenever you feel stress encroaching on your life, head outdoors. Go out and take a long walk and enjoy the beauty of the landscape. One may even take a few pictures in order to capture the beauty of life, no matter if it’s a cherry blossom, a rainbow, or a winter landscape.

4 – Read as many books as possible

Reading is a beautiful way to gather new life perspectives. It is incredible how one may fall in love with a particular character. Every book teaches us something new and valuable, so don’t forget to read. It doesn’t matter if you choose a novel, a psychological book about self-development, or a motivational book.

Beyond learning about new ideas, books can transport us out of our minds in a quiet, focused activity. A 2018 Chinese study confirms that bibliotherapy (therapeutic intervention via reading books) is useful in alleviating the symptoms of both depression and anxiety in children.

5 – Keep a positivity journal

Sometimes we ignore good things because we focus too much on the bad ones. This should change.

But how?

Keep a positivity journal, aka gratitude journal, each day. This daily habit allows you to reflect on your day and take stock of all the cool things that happen to you. From the mere fact of waking up in the morning in reasonably good health to celebrations of milestones, something good happened to you. Take time to dig deep and find this event. Even on dark days, you should focus on the small things that add to your quality of life.

This practice invites abundance into your life. The positive thoughts will allow the flow of excellent outcomes into your realm. As a bonus, these positives will eclipse the adverse events in time.

So every night before going to sleep, write down all the things that you are grateful for and make a list of everything that made you happy.

Final Thoughts on Finding Beauty Around You–and Gaining in Positivity

Choose to see the good in others, even when fighting with them, listen to uplifting music as often as possible and make many compliments to others. In this way, you will make others feel good about themselves. Better yet, the beauty and positivity you invite into your life will enhance your mental balance and open up new doors for you.

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