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12 Essential Oils for Clear Skin : How to Use Them + Benefits  

Clear skin is something most of us search for a lifetime to find. While many products promise to give us the effortless healthy glow and firm and flawless skin, there are other all-natural ways to get the best skin of your life. With the right essential oils, you’ll be able to take advantage of nature’s best-kept secrets.

Essential Oils for Clear Skin

Want clear skin? Tired of struggling with oily skin, acne, inflammation, and similar conditions?

Look no further than some of the most popular essential oils. From the likes of clove essential oil to geranium essential oil, using these oils as part of your skincare routine will help you get the clear skin you’ve been longing for. Read on to find the best essential oil for clear skin.

1. Reduce Blemishes with Tea Tree Oil

Tired of turning to over-the-counter and prescription solutions for treating blemishes?

It’s time to try tea tree oil. This all-natural essential oil is a key ingredient for many people hoping to fight acne.

Loved for its antimicrobial, antibacterial, and antibiotic properties, tea tree oil is incredibly effective in killing any bacteria or germs that threaten to aggravate acne-prone skin.

With just one drop to the affected area or as part of a DIY treatment, this is is an incredibly powerful essential oil for clear skin.

2. Treat Cysts and Boils with Clove Essential Oil

Cysts can be particularly difficult to treat. These cysts are caused by bacteria and can be incredibly challenging to remove.

However, with the help of the best essential oils, you’ll be able to target and eliminate your cysts completely.

Take advantage of this all-natural treatment by using organic clove bud oil to treat any affected skin. The anti-inflammatory, anti-fungal, antimicrobial, and antibacterial elements in this oil make it a godsend to cystic outbreaks or boils. While traditional medicine is often used to treat these types of outbreaks, this essential oil is one of the best and most natural solutions to rid your skin of this condition for good.

Hoping this clove essential oil will treat your cystic acne? Be sure to consult with your doctor or dermatologist for their opinion before starting on this treatment.

3. Fight Pimples with Lemongrass Essential Oil

Lemongrass essential oil is a favorite among dermatologists and customers with oily skin alike. This stimulating essential oil is one that makes for an awesome DIY astringent.

Citrusy and light, lemongrass oil is one fragrant natural solution for fighting acne. This antimicrobial and antiseptic oil is effective in destroying pimples and relieving any pain related to acne.

This oil is one of the best oils for clear skin as it helps to prevent and reduce one’s appearance of pimples all while revitalizing and healing the skin.

As you start to use this essential oil as part of your daily beauty regimen, you’ll find that it has a wide variety of uses. As versatile as this oil is, it can be used as an astringent, cleanser, and overall fighter of acne.

When using this oil to fight acne, remember that a little goes a long way. Using too much of this oil can be harmful, so only use a few drops to keep your skin as healthy a possible.

4. Heal Popped Pimples with Lavender Essential Oil

So you’ve popped your pimples, cysts, or ingrown hairs? While it isn’t recommended to pop these common blemishes, the fact is that this does happen.

When cysts, pimples, and ingrown hairs are popped, this more often than not leads to scarred skin. If you find yourself in this situation, use lavender essential oil as soon as possible.

This soothing and calming oil will help relieve irritation and itchiness as it helps to heal and clean any affected areas. Moreover, using this essential oil will work to repair the skin after these blemishes have been popped.

5. Reduce Scarring with Frankincense Essential Oil

Another great essential oil for clear skin is frankincense essential oil.

This oil is an excellent solution for reducing scarring on the skin. Whether you’ve been cut and are bruising or you’re hoping to reduce scarring from acne, this essential oil is an all-natural and gentle treatment for repairing your skin.

Additionally, this oil is an excellent treatment for irritated and dry skin. With this oil, you’ll be able to better balance your skin’s oil production, as well as reduce inflammation.

Make your own DIY frankincense treatment with 20 or so drops of this oil added to a carrier oil, then apply to damp and clean skin.

Not sure what carrier oil to use? Consider jojoba oil.

Get back to nature by using jojoba as this oil is particularly light and the closest oil to our own molecular structure for sebum.

Top cosmetologists note that this oil is an ideal carrier oil for individuals with oily skin as it will trick one’s skin into thinking it has already produced enough oil. Thus, using jojoba helps to stop the overproduction of any oils that may otherwise trigger acne.

6. Treat Acne with Rosemary Essential Oil

If you haven’t used rosemary essential oil for acne treatment yet, now is the time. This incredible oil has many benefits designed to improve the overall health of your skin.

As rosemary is known for its antiseptic properties, this oil is one of the best for reducing excess oil in the skin and eliminating inflammation.

Use frankincense oil to reduce redness and soreness caused by acne. As this oil also helps to improve circulation in the skin, be sure to use this oil if you want a clearer complexion and firmer skin.

7. Calm Skin with Aloe Vera Oil

Using aloe vera oil will help to calm the skin, reduce inflammation and redness.

If your skin tends to be particularly aggravated, use this essential oil on a regular basis. As it is packed with Vitamin B, E, and C, as well as other minerals, proteins, beta-carotene, and amino acids, using this essential oil will help to actively repair your skin.

8. Regulate Sebum Production with Geranium Essential Oil

Geranium essential oil is another important oil for regulating the production of sebum, making it an ideal pick for oily skin.

If you have overly oily skin, use this oil to tighten your skin and promote blood circulation. Regular use of this oil will help to heal any scars from acne as well.

9. Hydrate Skin with Ylang-Ylang Essential Oil

Ylang-ylang oil is an important treatment that effectively treats any irritation inflammation and dryness in the skin.

This soothing oil helps to regulate your skin’s oil production, hoping to balance out oily skin and eliminate excessive acne. As this oil helps to promote the growth of skin and hair, it is one of the best solutions for clear skin.

When used regularly, ylang-ylang oil also helps to improve circulation in the skin, helping to maintain hydration and prevent infection.

10. Fight Breakouts with Myrrh Essential Oil

Never thought to use myrrh oil for clear skin?

This oil is one of the oldest beauty treatments as it has a wide variety of benefits. As myrrh has powerful antiseptic properties, it is a powerful go-to for killing bacteria and microbes. When used for treating skin, this oil will help to protect against bacteria that may otherwise trigger acne.

essential oils

Additionally, past studies have shown that this essential oil can help heal wounds. When used as a skin treatment, myrrh also helps to inhibit fungi and the like that are triggered by bacteria on the skin.

11. Treat Breakouts with Chamomile Essential Oil

While chamomile makes for a tasty tea, as an essential oil, it is also an excellent treatment for acne.

Use chamomile oil to help you fight acne with its antiseptic and anti-inflammatory properties. Similarly, regularly using this oil will help to fight breakouts and acne scars.

In addition to chamomile’s effectiveness in treating acne, you can use this powerhouse essential oil to protect your skin from the effects of aging. As this oil helps to reduce the damage from free-radicals, it will also help to accelerate tissue and cell regeneration.

12. Soothe Skin with Eucalyptus Oil

Eucalyptus oil has long since been a favorite when it comes to all-natural acne treatments. With this essential oil, you’ll be able to kill any bacteria that threaten to infect your pores and develop into acne.

These antiseptic properties help to eliminate acne and clear up your skin. Additionally, this oil will help to reduce oil production, which helps to lower the risk of more future outbreaks.

Final Thoughts on Essential Oils for Clear skin

If you’ve never used this oil to treat your skin, now is the time to start doing so. With all the vitamins and nutrients packed in these high-powered oils, your skin will be totally transformed with these new additions to your beauty routine.

Stand up to acne, scars, cysts, blemishes, and more by using your own treatment with these essential oils. Keep this guide in mind as you search for the best oil to treat your skin with.

Here’s How A Woman Beat Stage 4 Breast Cancer in 2 Months Without Chemotherapy

When most people hear that they have Stage 4 cancer, they tend to think all hope is lost. However, a new treatment is restoring faith to doctors and patients alike. After taking part in an experimental clinical study, Judy Perkins discovered her breast cancer had vanished without any chemotherapy. This gave hope to thousands of others going through the same thing. How exactly did her cancer disappear without conventional treatment? Read on to find out her incredible story.

Woman Cures Stage 4 Breast Cancer in 2 Months Without Chemotherapy…Here’s How She Did It

Judy’s battle with cancer

Judy Perkins got the unpleasant news in 2003 that she had the early stages of breast cancer. Soon after, she got a mastectomy and got back to her regularly scheduled life. However, 10 years later, Judy found that the disease had returned and had become full-blown metastasis.

An unconventional treatment

Doctors offered Judy the most common treatments such as chemotherapy and immunotherapy, but she didn’t respond to them. Two years later, though, she had a renewed sense of hope after coming across an unusual treatment for cancer. In a class on immunotherapy, she met Stephanie Goff, a member of the National Cancer Institute. Stephanie told her she was doing clinical trials of groundbreaking cancer treatments using immunotherapy, so Judy immediately decided to sign up to be a part of the study.

The immunotherapy treatment

The doctors took out some immune cells from Judy’s body. They then evaluated what happened when the cells came in contact with cancerous cells. Once they figured out which immune cells attacked the cancerous cells, they took the cells to the lab. Scientists kept them here for a few months while the immune cells multiplied and increased in potency. Once the immune cells were strong enough, doctors injected them back into Judy’s body.

breast cancer

Cancer-free in 2 months

At the beginning of the treatment, Judy felt very sick and suffered from chills, pain, and fatigue daily. However, Judy kept at it because she knew the treatment was working. “I started to notice that the tumor pinching the nerve in my arm seemed to be causing me less pain,” she said. “After a week or 2, it was pretty much gone.’’ She noticed the same results with the tumor near her heart. The treatment was successful, and in less than 2 months, Judy’s cancer eradicated. She’s been cancer-free now since 2016.

The mastermind behind this breast cancer treatment

The doctor who came up with immunotherapy is Dr. Steven Rosenberg, Chief of Surgery at the National Cancer Institute, and a pioneer in immunotherapy research. “I think it’s the most promising treatment now being explored for solving the problem of the treatment of metastatic, common cancers,” he shared. It may not cure every patient’s breast cancer, but it can certainly provide a new solution to many people.

What do you think about immunotherapy? Have you ever known anyone who has undergone this treatment? Share with us in the comments!

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

15 Foods You Can Eat On a Low Carb Diet to Boost your Health

We all love carbs. From pizza to baguettes and beyond, carbs make a strong contender for the best macronutrient. However, many of us have decided to steer away from carbs for a while in an attempt to shed some fat and re-focus our health. If this is you, you may have noticed that a lot of your favorite foods are carb-heavy. If you’re struggling to figure out how to stay satiated and not an irritated, hungry mess without your carbs, fear not. There are tons of healthy, nutrient-dense, low-carb food options out there that don’t make you feel like you’re dieting. The secret is to be selective in how you choose your food.

Fifteen Low Carb Diet Foods Never to Overlook

With that in mind, below are fifteen delicious, nutrient-dense foods that fit perfectly on a low-carb diet.

1. Eggs

The most basic breakfast item out there is still one of the healthiest options, especially for a low carb diet. Eggs have a ton of protein and healthy fats, not to mention their high omega-3 content, which helps regulate brain function as well as cardiovascular health. Eggs are a super-basic building block for a huge variety of foods. The first that comes to mind is the infamous avocado toast, which can be made with a ket-friendly toast to keep the carbs low. Eggs can also be used for a variety of dinner options and can be prepared in a variety of ways.

eggplant

2. Red Meat

This is a huge category of foods that offers a ton of variety. Meat’s high protein content makes it very satiating, which is crucial to succeeding on a low carb diet. Meats offer more than protein, though: They have a great variety of nutrients that are crucial to overall health and longevity. In particular, beef has a good amount of vitamin B12 and iron. Iron is essential to maintaining energy levels, which you’ll need more than ever without the “quick” energy that carbs usually provide. Other meats like lamb or bison vary but are all generally a mixture of good protein and mostly healthy fats, so they are all safe options.

3. Salmon

Seafood is arguably the healthiest (in terms of nutrient content) food out there. Seafood is particularly high in vitamin B-12 and Omega-3 fatty acids and, of course, contains virtually no carbs. Salmon, one of the best seafood options, is super high in good protein and fats as well. The best part about seafood is that it is virtually carb-free and always high in protein.

4. Brocolli

Most vegetables are super low in carbs, especially leafy green vegetables like spinach and kale. Other vegetables like peppers or tomatoes are a bit higher in carbs, but not nearly high enough to be excluded from this list. Other vegetables like potatoes or plantains are pretty high in carbs. Brocolli is a great low carb option; it’s one of the best sources of vitamin C, and it has been found to have a variety of cancer-fighting properties. It can be added to a variety of dishes for a great nutrient boost.

5. Shellfish

While shellfish probably isn’t a common item on your plate, they are still worth considering as part of a healthy diet. Foods like crab or lobster closely match organ meats in their nutrient content. They contain a variety of nutrients that are lacking in most people’s diets, and of course, are essentially free of carbs. There are around 4-5 net grams of carbs per 100 grams of shellfish.

6. Eggplant

An eggplant is a great option for low carb diets because it retains a nice, carb-like structure without the presence of a lot of actual carbs. It can be chopped up and used in stir-fries in Asian dishes, along with a ton of other options. Eggplant can also be crusted with parmesan cheese for a very convincing bread-like cheesy dish. It is perhaps best prepared roasted to bring out the sweetness.

7. Asparagus

One of the best side dishes to pair with meat out there, asparagus is super high in both fiber and vitamin C. It is very high in protein for a vegetable, and also contains folates and vitamin K. Asparagus can be pan-roasted with plenty of olive oil and butter and topped with garlic and parmesan cheese. Served alongside steak or salmon, asparagus is a great side dish option for low carb diets.

8. Avocados

Avocados have become the fruit in vogue in the past few years, and for good reason: They are a super satiating fruit that is high in nutrients without the presence of carbs. Plus, avocados are high in omega-3’s as well as potassium. They also contain plenty of fiber, which transforms carbs into net carbs, which means they are not digested or absorbed by the body. Avocados are always great served alongside eggs or meat.

best low-carb diet foods

9. Almonds

Almonds are another option for a low carb diet that is high in fat and protein with very few carbs. Additionally, almonds have a ton of fiber and vitamin E. They also contain magnesium, a vital micronutrient that most people don’t get enough of in their daily diet. Because of their high protein and caloric content, they are super filling, which makes them a powerful food to include in a low carb diet. Almonds can be eaten by the handful, thrown on top of smoothie bowls, or included in salads.

10. Chia Seeds

Chia seeds have become much more popular in the last few years among health and diet enthusiasts. These tiny seeds are incredibly nutrient-dense, and, because of their size, are extremely versatile when it comes to including them in your diet. Chia seeds can be mixed with water or almond milk to make a pudding, which can be topped with fruit and other healthy, high-protein foods. They can also be thrown in smoothies or sprinkled on top of just about anything.

11. Cheese

If you can do dairy, cheese is a great high-protein and low carb diet option for you. Besides being one of the most satisfying and delicious foods on the planet, cheese contains plenty of good protein and fats. We probably don’t have to tell you to eat more of it, but just in case you need some ideas, you can bake it on top of meats, shred it on top of tacos with keto-friendly tortillas, or eat slices of it when cravings strike.

12. Full-fat yogurt

Yogurt, when purchased at big chain grocery stores, is most often found in “low fat” form. This is because, for years, popular health science has touted the benefits of low fat diets, assuming that consuming fat is what makes us fat. While this might sound like common sense to some, it’s really not the truth. For most people, excess sugar consumption is what makes them fat, not dietary fats. The problem with “low fat” yogurt is that it has lots of added sugar to replace the flavor it would normally get from fat. Because of this, look for full-fat yogurt to avoid the excess carbs. Full-fat yogurt has tons of protein: Just one cup has around 20 grams of protein.

13. Butter

While butter has historically been seen as the enemy, it’s really not detrimental to your health when consumed in a normal amount. We honestly can’t say enough good things about butter. It’s extremely satiating, has no carb content whatsoever, and makes everything taste incredible. It contains plenty of great nutrients, especially if you choose grass-fed butter, which we highly recommend. A super-popular option for a low-carb diet is bulletproof coffee (coffee with butter and MCT oil blended in.) Fans claim that it can increase energy and help burn fat. While it might take a little getting used to, it’s actually quite good.

13. Coconut Oil

Another popular health food, coconut oil is a great alternative to other cooking oils. It has a unique (but very pleasant) taste and has plenty of medium-chain fatty acids that can work to boost your metabolism. Including fats like coconut oil in your diet can curb appetites and help you lose fat quickly.

low carb diet

14. Coffee

Coffee, when taken black or with cream, has zero carbs. It has also been shown to help increase the body’s fat-burning ability. If you’re into intermittent fasting, it has also been shown to have the ability to curb appetites to help push your first meal back a little later in the day. Coffee is our secret weapon for fat burning and sticking to a low carb diet successfully.

15. Dark Chocolate

Surprise! Dark chocolate can be included in a low carb diet, with one stipulation: It has to be real dark chocolate. Look for chocolate that advertises over 70% cocoa content, and you should be safe. Make sure to check the nutrient facts section to make sure there isn’t excess sugar added in. Natural dark chocolate is packed with tons of great nutrients and is extremely satiating as a healthy dessert option. In addition, around 25% of carb content in chocolate is fiber, which means that the total net carbs are greatly reduced.

10 Time Management Tips That Will Give You More Success And Freedom

Time management is something that teachers don’t tell us in school. However, this might be one of the most important topics that you can master.

Time is everything in a world where we want to get as much done as possible. We might have energy. Yet, we lose hours to our sleep and wake cycles. We must utilize our daytime as best as possible when we want to achieve something without losing time in the process.

You could be working on completing an important project, making the income that you want, or achieving your dreams. And, you might need time management tips. Here are some time management hints that will drastically change your life with their simplicity.

10 Time Management Tips for Success

Try these ten hacks to improve your productivity.

Find Where You Are Losing Time

pop meme

It might be the occasional look on social media that turns into an hour of reading posts or just endless talks on the phone. Either way, there are periods in the day when you aren’t productive. In fact, you’re doing things that are not propelling you forward in a chosen direction. We all need our time to relax. And sometimes that makes us even more productive during our working hours. However, time for inactivity and leisure can also be strategically set apart from the rest of the day.

Most people get caught up wasting our precious time. It could be because you have it easy in those moments or are too vague or hindered in your goals to get on with them. Whatever the case may be, the first step to claiming back more of your time for the things that you count on is to pinpoint the activities that you use to escape from your productivity time.

This drain of your time could be surfing on the internet, reading emails, or just chattering on the phone. When you find the things that take up most of your time, set a time limit. This habit makes you keep a check on the time you are spending on those activities and keep it to a minimum.

Separate your Work Time and Personal Time

When you are at work, you can be tempted to open up that email from a friend or checking out an online shop. This distraction cuts up your time and concentration on what you are doing. Focus is the key to finishing things as quickly as possible.

When you are busy at work and know that you must complete a given goal for a given period. Therefore, you will focus entirely on what you are doing and finish it as quickly and efficiently as possible. This task might require that you set a goal that you will not look at things that are separate from your work until you are finished. Keeping things compartmentalized this way will make you feel calmer as well as you will not be jumping between different tasks simultaneously.

Organize Your Work Space

Disorganization is another time waste. You might not realize it, but how much time passes by to find the file you need on your computer or a desk? Time organization includes space organization as well.

Keep things organized and labeled. Then, when you look for something, you will not spend minutes looking for it. This searching for something you need in the middle of the process also impeded your momentum with work and diverts your attention from what you are doing.

Set Clear Time Limits

We all have many jobs to do. So whether you’re reading emails or completing a project, it’s a good idea is to set time blocks for those activities. For example, if you need to read emails from clients, you will strictly place a time limit for this activity.

Whatever happens, the moment the clock hits that time limit, you will stop doing it and go onto another essential task. Another great thing about this particular time management tip is that you will not linger on one email when you know that you have a limited amount of time to read them all and respond.

Have Routines That You are Committed To

Routines are great for time management because they help you get straight to your task without losing time or wondering when and whether to start what you have planned. While routine is not something set in stone and changes can occur on different days, if you keep to your routine as much as possible, you will have more consistency and focus when doing what you must accomplish.

This practice gives you peace of mind when dealing with things that you might not particularly enjoy working on. Instead of wondering when to do them, you will have the time of the day set aside for them when you will be mentally prepared to deal with whatever they require of you.

brain multitasking

Get Help

If you are working on a chore or task that requires your particular skills or qualities and takes up all or most of your time, consider delegating or outsourcing. While this step will need you to look for the right people to complete tasks for you, once you find the right people, you will be glad that you found someone to help you out.

Find people who can do the simple things for you like reading and answering emails or just taking some of the workloads on themselves. Some people look to complete simple tasks daily for you, so you can concentrate and work without disturbance on what you do best to push your projects forward.

Prioritize

There are too many things to be seen and done. You might have people waiting for you to spend time with them or projects that you are thinking of starting. Remember that you still have your hours of the day to dedicate to your activities.

Whenever thinking about whether to turn down a meeting or not, remember that time is the most precious thing you can give to something or someone. Choose the things that you give your time to carefully, as those will become part of you and your future.

When waking up in the morning, you can make a list of the priorities that you have for that specific day. This list will help you to keep your eye on the things that are important to you and not jump into random activities during the day and leaving your priorities behind. Be decisive and even ruthless when choosing your preferences over things that you do with half a heart or for uncertain causes.

Use Time Management Tools to Your Advantage

Today there are apps, tools, and programs for your computer for almost anything that you can think of. There are also time management tools and apps that you can and should use for your daily schedule.

The will help you organize your time in a way that you can tailor it to your unique lifestyle. Tools such as Outlook let you schedule your events way before their time. Even if you forget about them in the future, the app will remind you of what you need to do for that day.

You can readjust the schedule at any given moment using those apps. This way, you will have an idea of graphically seeing your days ahead of you and making any changes that you need to make at any given time. Seeing the thing you need to do graphically will also give you more clarity on what you need to get accomplished and check them off as you go.

Don’t Wait

You might fall into any situation where you have to wait or something. While you are waiting for someone to do something that you are dependent on, use the time to your advantage. With the mobile world we live in now, you can always open up your phone or laptop and finish up something while waiting.

Remember that your time is precious and any five additional minutes can be used to check up on emails, get spreadsheets done, or plan your next step for your projects.

Set Goals

It’s vital to implement time management tips. It’s also essential to remember that you are not changing time but improving your habits and behaviors. Have a clear set goal to eliminate all your time-wasting in the first place. For example, you can set a goal to cut down talking on the phone to a specific time limit. Then, never go over it.

Set clear goals for a certain amount of time and change your habits one by one. With patience, you will completely transform the way you do things and how your days go by. Before you know it, you will be getting more done than you ever expected. And, you’ll have time set aside for the things that make you unwind.

time management skills

 

Final Thoughts on Time Management Tips

Time management is all about changing your habits and the way you look at your life. You will begin to value your time and yourself more as you start to prioritize your time.

Learn to change the way you manage your time. Indeed, you will be surprised at how much longer your day will seem. Plus, you’ll love learning how much you can get done in a single day. You will also feel more relaxed and less stressed out with what looked like strenuous work before. This is because cutting your attention span with multiple tasks is more stressful than working long hours during the day.

Take your productivity and time in your own hands with these time management tips. You might be pleasantly surprised by the results and boost your self-confidence through the process.

25 People Describe Their First Experience With Anxiety

Anxiety disorders are the most pervasive mental disorders in the U.S.

And it’s a commonly found illness, affecting over 40 million adults age 18 or older, or 18.1% of the population. Unfortunately, only about 37% of those suffering receive treatment, probably due to the stigma still surrounding mental illness. Until recently, scientists thought that a hyperactive amygdala – the brain’s emotional processing center – caused anxiety.

However, new studies have come out showing that anxiety is caused by complex interactions between different brain regions and that by being able to overpower the emotional brain by using cognitive rationality, anxiety will be reduced.

Cognitive behavioral therapy, medication, or a combination of both can usually help reduce anxiety symptoms. Also, eating healthy, exercise, getting enough sunlight and sleep, reducing stress, and other lifestyle factors can help symptoms of anxiety.

However, people with anxiety will tell you that it isn’t an easy disorder to manage by any means, and it usually requires lifelong treatment to keep symptoms under control. Below, you’ll find first-hand experiences from different people who have suffered from anxiety their whole lives.

We hope you find comfort in their stories and that they will serve as a reminder that you are not alone.

25 People Describe Their First Experience With Anxiety

1 – Malia A.

I could date this all the way back to grade school. Not wanting to go to Wednesday night church because I was so shy and afraid I would get asked to be called on or someone would just want to talk to me. I would feel physically sick because if it. #My1stExperienceWithAnxiety

2 – Rebecca

3 – Tristitia

 

4 – Nico

5 -Nohemi

 

6- Jennifer

7 – Brittney

8 – Bella

9 – Lindsay F

10 -Brittany L.

11 – Chloe

12 – Maddie

13 –  Arya

14 – Gamerga

15 – Jacqueline Z.

16 – Jim

17 – Bekah K.

18 – McSpocky

19 – Kaz W.

20 – Alana

social anxiety

Social anxiety is a real struggle. Learn 12 tips for coping.

21 – Jordan D.

22 – Joolz

23 – Nadir

24 – Allis

25 – Elle

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

Why Finding the Right One Begins with You

We all crave love, but not just any love. We crave a love where we are free to be ourselves; where we connect with the other person intimately; where we feel supported, listened to, and protected. All of us want a love that completes us physically, emotionally, and mentally. We want to find the Right One we can give our entire soul to … knowing they will do the same.

Yet, with over 8 billion people on this planet, finding “the right one” can be a bit challenging. Young girls are raised to look for a knight on a great stallion to sweep in and carry them away. A man is taught to go out and seek many women until they find the woman of their dreams. These are quite contradictory to each other and certainly not how love works in reality.

Finding “The Right One” may require you to find yourself first.

It may require you to let go of your fairytales from childhood and be willing to accept that the man may not be the tall, dark, handsome prince, but instead of average height, slightly overweight, and possibly bald. The woman of your dreams may not have the perfect figure you dreamed of, be a great housewife, or blindly follow you wherever you wish to go.

It is those traits that may make them perfect for your imperfections.

“Never obsess about chasing love. Chase goals [and] dreams. Chase the behaviors that are going to make you better. You don’t chase love; you allow that to find you by accident, and when it finds you on accident, you’ll know that it was supposed to find you purposely” – Sylvester McNutt III, in “Lust for Life”

Know yourself and heal yourself

Knowing yourself, or self-actualization can be a crucial component to finding lasting love. I had a friend who carried around insecurities, past loves, and old emotional baggage; she found the “one” for her at 70 years of age.

How you may ask?

It wasn’t that she hadn’t been married before. She had. Sadly, this person became a widow by age 50. Events related to her husband’s death and relationships afterward kept her from becoming the person she was meant to be. She also failed to accept who she was. Once she did accept herself and made some necessary changes in her life, she found the man of her dreams.

Now, don’t make the mistake of thinking it was as easy as I made it sound. She was on that journey for years. I just so happened to become friends with her in the most pivotal last few years. It was an amazing transformation and I was so happy for her when I attended her wedding. They were married within a year of starting to date because they “just knew.”

Don’t make the mistake of thinking the right one is going to make you happy and take away all of your baggage and insecurities. The goal in life should be to become the best version of yourself you can possibly be. Granted, that is a lifelong process. You should always be changing and growing. However, it is essential that you recognize that happiness is a “now” concept. It is not about when all the ducks are lined up in a row perfectly.

Be happy with who and where you now.

For several of us, that is a difficult concept. Part of that means dealing with your past baggage and insecurities. You have to be able to love yourself to let love in. That is not just a cliché. When you are hurt, angry, or bitter, you are less trusting of others and, therefore, less open to allowing others into your life.

The sooner you are able to know and heal yourself, the more willing you are meet others, trust them in your life and be open to receiving love.

Embrace Imperfection

Knowing yourself should include embracing your imperfections, as well as the imperfections of others. Our imperfections are part of what makes us who we are. They are the unique twists and turns of your personality that make you, you. What you may view as a fault, maybe something that another person finds real value in. The same philosophy should apply to how we view others.

Some people can look at the traits of stubbornness and think of negative ideas like closed-mindedness, inflexibility, and determination to have their way. Others can look at the stubbornness and see a strong will, passion, and determination.

Oftentimes, humorously, one person’s perceived faults can be what makes our strengths shine. It can aid in creating a mutually beneficial relationship. For example, having two stubborn people in a relationship together can be intense. They tend to be more like two bulls butting heads.

Yet, if one of the two knows how to back off, then communication becomes far more successful. On the other hand, the more willful one may bring out the expressiveness of the passive one. In essence, they complement each other through this dichotomy so long as respect is given to each.

No One Is Perfect

Learning to recognize that not only are you not perfect, but neither is anyone else, can surprisingly bring you great relief. The pressure is off for you to force yourself to be a certain way that is contradictory to your nature. You can then learn to appreciate your faults and see where they actually serve you. You will see how your weaknesses have taught your brain to think differently. A person prone to depression, for example, will usually be more empathetic than the average person. They feel for the underdog and will go out of their way to help someone in need.

Accepting your flaws will allow you to be far more accepting of other weaknesses. It will also balance the idea that the right one you are looking for must fit your idea of the “perfect person.” They don’t need to be perfect, and shouldn’t be. Their imperfections will perfectly offset your imperfections and allow each other’s strengths to shine.

Pushing your limits to grow together

While striving to become the best you that you can be, the right one may enter your life and cause even more havoc. The right one might push all of your buttons. He/she may challenge your way of thinking about life, people, success, and love.

Finding the right one does not guarantee love at first glance or the whirlwind romance of roses and kisses. Sometimes that right one is going to turn your world on its end first. They force you to make changes for your own betterment that you hadn’t even conceived yet. They will challenge you, push your limits, and even infuriate you. In the end, the two of you have been molded together.

On the other hand, they may also teach you how to love yourself and heal. They may see through your façade and demonstrate enough love, care, and patience to help you bloom back into the person you were meant to be.

Essentially, not every relationship is obvious in the beginning. Everyone is a work in progress and, therefore, relationships require work as well. The more two people learn about each other through strife but remain supportive, the stronger their love can become. Life is hard and so are relationships. Both require work, but that work becomes the foundation for something great and lasting. Knowing you have each other’s back breeds trust, a sense of calm about each other, an innate ability to communicate with each other, and comfort in each other’s nearness.

the one

Above all, the right one will only help grow your capacity to love, be empathetic and supportive, and further encourage you to be the best you can be.

The right one is not about just what they can do for you. You are together to help each other through this world and this life. With continued work, communication, trust, respect, and love, your relationship can only grow stronger. With appreciation and gratitude, love only grows more abundant. There is no limit to the amount of love you can share and the beauty is, the more you share, the more it grows.

In conclusion, finding the right one may include finding and accepting yourself, flaws and all, so you can, in turn, open your eyes and your heart. The right one may not be the perfect one of your dreams, and neither are you. Yet, a relationship with the right one will be far more substantial and rewarding than any fairy tale.

“I’d rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else.

I’d rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself.

I’d rather have hard times together than to have it easy apart.

I’d rather have the one who holds my heart.”

Luther Vandross – song “I’d Rather”

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