Going through a breakup can be devastating and likely stir up some negative feelings. You might be angry, hurt, confused, scared, or sad, but you can reclaim happiness and move on. While you might not feel like that is possible right now, you will find that you can find joy again.
The negative feelings that come after a breakup do not last forever. You must take it one day at a time and give yourself time to grieve and heal. Each day is one step closer to overcoming, so keep pushing through.
How to Reclaim Happiness After a Breakup
When you find yourself struggling, there are things you can do to help you along. These tips will help you reclaim happiness and find joy in your life again.
1. Give Yourself Enough Time and Permission to Grieve
Breakups are devastating and can leave you feeling hurt, insecure, and many other negative feelings. You need time to get over these feelings, and grieving is the only way to get started. Permit yourself to grieve and give yourself plenty of time.
There is no rush, and it won’t happen immediately. Work on it a little at a time, and give in to your feelings sometimes. Some days will be better than others, but allow yourself to cry or wallow when necessary.
2. Take Care of Yourself
If you want to reclaim happiness, you must focus on yourself. Take care of yourself by practicing self-care both physically and mentally. Get out of bed in the morning, take a shower, and eat a nutritious meal each day.
Your physical needs must be met, and your emotional ones need to be, as well. Get enough sleep, exercise, spend time with family and friends and do things that you enjoy.
Part of taking care of yourself means handling your responsibilities, too. Go to work when you’re supposed to, do your job, and make sure to pay the bills when they are due. If you let these practical things go, you’ll never manage to find happiness again.
3. Don’t Blame Yourself
It is easy to fall into the trap of self-blame after a breakup. Neither of you is perfect, so you both likely made some mistakes along the way.
If you made a mistake, it is fine to recognize it. It should be used as a learning opportunity instead of a reason to blame yourself.
4. Pursue Your Personal Goals and Make a Positive Life Change
Now is the time to do whatever you have always wanted to do. Make the most of your time spent alone, and use it to pursue things you didn’t have time for before. Set goals and chase your dreams as you make positive life changes that will bring happiness.
If you haven’t achieved your life dream yet, work on that. Otherwise, set new goals for yourself and focus your time and energy on making progress.
As you advance and develop your skills, you will feel more confident. It will keep you focused on something positive and give you a sense of individuality.
5. Recognize Your Feelings
You can’t grieve, move on, and find happiness if you don’t acknowledge your feelings. Take some time to sit quietly and pay attention to the way you feel. Your thoughts and emotions can help with recognition, and then you can focus on the rest.
6. Spend Time Doing Your Hobbies
Spending time doing what you love to do is essential if you want to reclaim happiness and find joy. You can do hobbies you used to enjoy but don’t do much anymore, or you can find new hobbies to try.
If you are looking for a new hobby, some ideas include:
- arts and crafts
- learning a musical instrument
- sports
- outdoor activities
- exercise
- writing
7. Turn to Your Support System
After a breakup, you need some support. Even if you are a private person, you will feel better if you have some company. When you feel upset, lonely, or angry, reach out to your trusted friends and family. Most people have been through a breakup, so they will be understanding and sympathetic.
Your support system should consist of people who are positively there for you. They might offer encouragement or help you work through your feelings. Spending time with those you care about can also help distract you from any negative feelings.
If you don’t have anyone in your life that you can talk to, consider professional support. A counselor or therapist can help you work through your feelings, and it’s helpful that they are unbiased.
8. Avoid Checking in on Your Ex
Checking in on your ex when you are still healing from the breakup is incredibly tempting. Looking them up on social media or asking around about them could hinder your healing process. It could even set you back and cause negative feelings to resurface.
If you have to, deactivate your social media accounts or delete the apps from your phone for a while. This will help you resist the temptation as it will take more work to look them up.
9. Remember That the Emotional Pain is Temporary
The pain you feel after a breakup is real and intense, but it will improve. Remind yourself that this emotional pain is only temporary when it seems like things can’t get any worse. You will reclaim happiness and find joy in life again.
Give yourself time to grieve and heal. Remember that the process has no timeframe, and it differs for everyone. Be patient and compassionate to yourself along the way.
10. Learn and Grow
Everything that happens in your life is a learning opportunity. Even through your pain, you should be finding ways to learn, grow, and better yourself as a person.
Reflect on your role in the breakup and the relationship in general. You are smarter now; once you have broken up with your ex, you can look at things differently. Figure out what you can do to become a better person and partner in the future.
You can learn from both the good and the bad times in your relationship. Learning will help you see the reason for the breakup and the benefit of this stage of your life.
11. Practice Self-Love and Positive Self-Talk
You will be surprised by how much self-love and positive self-talk can help you reclaim happiness. These positive behaviors will help you reaffirm your belief in yourself, which is essential right now. Even if you made mistakes, you deserve self-love and positivity.
If you give in to negative thinking, find a way to change your mindset. Push the negative thoughts away and replace them with positive things about yourself. No matter what anyone else says, you deserve love and support and should start giving it to yourself.
12. Revisit Places You Love
Don’t let memories of your ex ruin your favorite places. It is tempting to avoid locations that entice memories with your ex, but you have to reclaim that part of your life.
The more frequently you visit those places, the better you will feel about it. Before you know it, you will create new memories that don’t bring up negative feelings.
13. Be Realistic
You must be real with yourself in all areas of your life, especially after a breakup. Negative thoughts won’t help, so be realistic and check your mindset. You will be more motivated to think positively when you acknowledge that your negative thoughts aren’t helpful.
Be realistic with yourself when it comes to the healing process. You won’t feel better overnight; some days might be worse than others. It takes time, and you can’t skip ahead, unfortunately.
14. Volunteer
When you spend time volunteering, you won’t think about yourself and your issues as much. You will be so focused on the task and helping others that you will find joy in it. Find a volunteer opportunity that involves doing something you enjoy so that you can have fun while helping out.
15. Accept it and Reclaim Your Peace
There is nothing you can do to change what happened, so acceptance is essential. Remember that there is a reason your relationship didn’t work out so that you can work on finding peace. Acceptance and coming to terms with the situation will help you move on.
Final Thoughts on Behaviors That Make it Easier to Reclaim Happiness After a Breakup
It doesn’t matter if you were the one who ended the relationship or the one broken up with. Either situation can be difficult, and you are bound to be upset or hurt. There is a way to reclaim happiness, though.
As you work through your breakup, remember these tips to help you get through. Each day you wake up and give these behaviors a shot, you will be one step closer to happiness.